First Contact
Introducing yourself online and your first meeting.
Responding to emails
We've been on the site and in the lifestyle for years. We are different from some, because we don't mind at all if people don't respond to our messages. A no-response is a respons…
118replies12,740viewsThings related to first contact that make you think WTF?
We got a Hot Listing from a single guy on another site who's tag line was "Looking for a friend after prison". Seriously?....lol
by mayhem8118replies12,625viewsFirst dates and fucking
I don't understand the frantic "I won't play on the first date" stuff in a swingers' community. A community specifically about sex. The boundary is don't fuck anybody you don't wa…
by Esperanza911158replies11,540viewsSexual expectations and communication?
We haven't made it as far as clothes coming off yet. And the first couple we met up with was absolutely wonderful when it came to talking about sexual likes/dislikes/etc. But we'v…
132replies8,819viewsKik
Brand new members here. Question: Should messages asking if we have Kik be considered suspicious? Is Kik even a good app? Everything else in profile seems legit so they might just…
144replies7,339viewsWhy do so few coupled women in the LS seem directly involve in their own dating lives?
It's frustrating to go to the trouble to actually finally meet a couple only to find out that the woman hasn't actually read our profile at all and just follows her husband wherev…
by Esperanza91182replies6,181viewsSo bad I had to post it
Just got this contact from a single guy. His profile grammar is about the same. Really does he think he can attract anyone with this? Hi haw are yall doing i open my pic for yall…
49replies6,017viewsHow much is too much
If you don’t get a reply from a single or couple after your initial message, how many times should you follow up before moving on?
by ItsMrFlex51replies5,516viewsCreative excuses
We've all been there, someone that you're meeting for the first time cancels at the last minute. The reason we were given this weekend was that he came down with a serious sinus i…
51replies5,460viewsWhy do people swing?
We know why we swing. But ya think of all the jealous peeps out there amd we wonder, why do so many swing??? We are curious of reasons...
58replies5,101viewsCasting your net: sending an email to show your interest
I'm not sure if this is on another thread elsewhere but I am curious... Do you send out a "form" email to show your initial interest in a person's profile or do you tailor it to t…
36replies4,736viewsOral and intercourse
How many positions due you know. Either oral or intercourse. I been researching both and putting down how to do them. If anyone wants to know name of positions.give me the bird an…
4replies4,553viewsWe have cooties!!!
Or we must, and everyone knows about it except us. We are easy going, laid back people who are always open to meeting new couples, but we can't get anything going on this site. We…
by kinkiez33replies4,115viewsMessages to nowhere.
We have been in the lifestyle for a number of years and have meet a lot of great couples. But why is it that we send massages of interest or just to say hi and not even get any re…
by Lkng4Mschf58replies4,071viewsInitial Contacting via messaging
Now that SLS has eliminated mail we all must use the messaging system. What is the consensus . . . . or various opinions as to the best way to make initial contact through the mes…
by pcbguy0183039replies3,955viewsKen and Barbie First Contact, Opinions?
The worst you'll get is a no. But you'll never get a yes if you don't ask. We say take the chance and say hi.
by AandJinNNJ8replies3,818viewsInitiating First Contact - Its Complicated
I think your issues are much deeper than just getting pickup advice from other swingers. If the fear of making small talk with a woman at a swingers party indeed causes insurmount…
26replies3,398viewsCamping
Looking to see if camping is a good way for a first meet. We own a camper and love the outdoors. Is anyone else interested in this.
by Newbee72923replies3,372viewsEver get a derogatory message from a couple like this?
Because some people have small, mean souls and are so comprehensively stupid they don't really understand that other people are real? That's my working theory anyway. In this case…
7replies3,222viewsFirst time doing this what do the experienced people here sugguest?
My wife and I decided last weekend to try this. We are going to a party which is a first for us and this whole thing is a first for us. We have been together for 18 years and are…
by garyamy10replies3,207viewsNeed suggestions for an appropriate response
On another web site we just received a message saying just one word: “interested”. The couple didn’t attach any pictures or open any private galleries. Their profile has one publi…
by hotluvrs32replies3,200viewsOne sentence replies
One sentence repliers are odd characters. I think that anyone you're exchanging messages with should reciprocate an equal level of openness. I've had inquiries from various profil…
by MrTrainer34replies3,155viewsConnection on a first date?
When you are meeting up with a couple on a first date, what helps you both to feel connected to the other couple? Thanks!
23replies2,983viewsCan I have your opinon privately
I have no experience with meeting people on here. I have only met people in person at a club. A couple recently messaged me on here and they are in a hurry to play with me. I said…
by Ymichael1468replies2,964viewsTrend of skittish contacts?
Looking back to earlier this year when we first joined, our profile was pretty bad. Way to general/broad in the text and our pics did not flatter or even really show us. Fast forw…
30replies2,712viewsReading Profiles!!
I find that so many message me without reading the entire profile and if they did they would realize their odds were slim at best and proving that they didn't care about things I…
20replies2,701viewsSharing Personal Galleries
Happy summer to you all. Couples/single women: what is your take on single guys opening their personal galleries in the 1st message, granted of course that the message itself is d…
by curious_mo11replies2,674viewsFace pictures requested .
So, some people say they won’t respond to you if you don’t put a face pic in your message... I feel that once you do that, you should at least get the courtesy of a response. Am I…
15replies2,552viewsNo replys
Why is it that when you express interest in a profile then reach out politely to the owner suggesting there might be a match so to speak and open your pics for them to see and may…
21replies2,533viewsCuriosity!!!!
My wife and I have a promise to each other. Either we both play or neither one of us plays. Why do so many men let there wives have sexual encounters, and they get what they are g…
by jb3ton12replies2,060viewsWhat to talk about?
My partner and I are new to navigating this lifestyle. When you first meet up with other couples for a meet and greet, what's "acceptable" to talk about? What do people find turns…
by Delmania24replies1,983viewsCopy and Paste introduction
It there something off putting about a copy and paste introductory message? Have lifestyle things picked up since Covid? It seems I have been having trouble meeting new friends la…
by SevenCoxxx47replies1,889viewsLong time married couple trying new experiences
So we are new to the lifestyle. Honestly my wife is the one who has been very curious about the lifestyle for a while now. However, we dont know where to start. So we finally took…
7replies1,811viewsIn Defense of Lets Fuck DMs
People often bitch and moan about lewd messages that skip the foreplay and get right down to business. These very same people will also decry timewasters and flakes. After a lot o…
14replies1,769viewsInvited to come over to see them
I am new on the site and I had met a single woman. According to the site she lived 7 miles from me. So I want to see her on the way she wanted me to pick up some chips for her. I…
5replies1,548viewsQuestion About Free Accounts
I've received a friend request from a couple with good pics, profile, validations, etc. No red flags. But no message and their profile is marked as a free account. I've sent them…
by Sparkline11replies1,522viewsContinuing or Ongoing Contact
This is more of a couples to couples post versus couples to singles. We admit this is not a new phenomenon but of late it seems to be getting worse....at least in our experience.…
by Phxfunx25replies1,476viewsBreaking the ice
We get lots of " let us know if you want to meet " or " We're willing to meet with you " Im here for fun , excitement and sex , I'm sorry but that approach is a turn off . I get t…
by Satincouple1replies1,388viewsMultiple Private Gallery requests
I suspect that these were accidental, but I got 4 requests from a couple with no other contact. If it were just 1 or 2 I might have Messaged them, but after 4 in a day, I just blo…
by mayhem811replies1,340viewsDress code
So what do you wear on a first meet? After years in the lifestyle, I still struggle with this. Obviously the venue is a factor, whether you're meeting a single or a couple, yes I'…
by sexxyjessy6915replies1,267viewsGHOSTING NEW TWIST ???
We chatted with a couple on a site today, they seemed very interested, even showed us their photo. Start out with him doing the talking, then "supposedly" she takes over and state…
by MNJFLA8replies1,145viewsPersonal Gallery Pics
We were just contacted by a good looking guy with lots of G rated pics in his profile. He also has over 20 Certs to his credit. Something that set me back was the fact that a numb…
6replies1,132viewsContinuing a conversation over text/IM
Once introductions and pleasantries are exchanged we move on to interests, jobs and what got us into the lifestyle. Now that we've tentatively set up a date it just seems rude to…
by WhiskeyGames9replies1,130viewsQuestion about the back and forth
Hello all, this forum has been really helpful for us as a couple as we start to navigate through some exciting experiences. We are completely new to this site and the LS. One ques…
by Jajk78806replies1,123viewsLingo
We are very green when it comes to a lot of this. I understand that swapping would not be considered "soft". But, where is the line? What constitutes being into soft swinging? Tha…
by ButtsnPucks2replies1,023viewsNever available or plans change on a dime
Perhaps this should have gone in the BF thread, but... We have a couple that we've chatted with for a while and exchanged outside emails. They occasionally write to us saying we s…
by mayhem810replies977viewsSwitching the conversation
Say you have been messaging a couple online and thing are going great, how should you switch the conversation from normal vanilla stuff to something more sexy and we want to swap?
by malandliz9replies971views- 2replies964views
My favorite part
The very first moment is probably my absolute favorite thing about swinging! When the door opens or when you're walking toward each other across the lobby or when you see them hea…
by sexxyjessy690replies903viewsFriends feature
We're new to the site. We got and accepted a friend request. It doesn't seem to have changed anything. Still the same level of photo access. What exactly does being "friends" do f…
by JandJDoeSRQ14replies888views
