685 total posts. Showing the most recent 100.
The korral kink night this month should be wildm it's the anniversary of kink night, and they will probably be near capacity. I recommend going down to the Baltimore Playhouse if you want a more pure kink experience.
Have heard that Covid did a number on the LS. We can't really speak to that
Pretty much given up on LS stuff. People were way more enthusiastic back in 2020 when we made an account. Not sure if we are aging out of things or if those people still into the LS around here have already filtered us out, but there is ju…
There are lots of swinksters in this area. Plenty of sex happening at kink events and bdsm happening at swinger events.
" Pull-ups. Women like watching men do pull-ups." 100% accurate.
This should be renamed the false dichotomy megathread
Not a huge fan of the turkey wattle look shaved genitals give off. I've also found penetrative sex to be better if people have hair. It seems to simultaneously add a bit of friction and maintain lubrication.
Genetics for the (occasional) win. Indeed. Sometimes you luck out on the draw of muscle inserts.
I highly doubt the OP asked about bench and chest development with zero consideration for the rest of the body. Almost nobody with a big bench also isn't horsecocking heafty loads on the OHP, deadlift, squat, and row.
It was a late summer evening Of flowered simplicity Two lovers walked down a path Bound by their mutual anxiety The breeze was warm and it passed with no threat Of any of the orange tinged leaves Two lovers gazes locked inside a season tha…
Only needs to be one if they are the right person, but if you are taking about non-regular play partners, the answer is "more." You need more leads.
That just seems to be dating apps as a whole. As a general rule of thumb, a message's effort and compellingness is directly proportional to how physically attractive they find you. If that baseline isn't there: you can't negotiate then int…
I'm trying to hit 405 by the end of the year. I hit 390 for a double last week. So, it looks like I'm going to get there. Can't speak for women in general, but my wife drools over my chest and shoulders and also my legs, which are rather s…
Precisely 87.35799987% of success in the LS is physical attraction, universally.
If someone writes and it is clear they didn't bother to read your profile (e.g. they meet zero stated requirements, or lead with something you specifically caution against), then they don't really deserve the courtesy. If it was a thoughtf…
Magnums and Skyn large are marginally different size wise in my experience. From what I can find Skyn Large are 56mm wide and Magnums 55mm.
FFM threesomes have to be one of the most common, if not the most common, sexual fantasies out there. Consequently, a large contingent of people in the LS are just unicorn hunting, and men don't matter to them. However, there are plenty of…
Lol. The grapefruits on that guy. That or he just has an overabundance or options. Fair play to him either way. At any rate, we'd be completely off put by that, but wouldn't be personally wounded or anything.
Indeed
Using the site, or other apps, as a primary mode of meeting people is really only routinely reliable for a select few (exceptionally attractive) people. For everyone else, it will maybe lead to a hit here and there. Going to clubs and even…
Interesting that it is women reacting negatively to the bush.
I'm a sucker for Altgirls and Battle PAWGS.
I think those attitudes probably stem from PrEP being associated with men on men activities, which is higher risk. The testing every 2-3 months while great, is typically just for HIV and not other STIs. From what I can discern only about 1…
What HollyBlue said. In the Kink community, they have what are called munches that are more or less the meet and greet concept, and we find them to be a waste of time.
It was in that liminal space of time between EA's huffs of glue and continuing to smash their keyboard. Normal, well-adjusted, people will take it as given that risk within the LS can't realistically be reduced to zero.
" Now with that said, if you think condoms are 100% effective in stopping STDs you are mistaken." This is something you imagined in order to rock about spastically on your little hobby horse. The CDC is quite clear that condoms are effecti…
Unless you are going to do an extensive STD panel and sexual history talk with every potential partner, forgoing condoms seems needlessly risky to us.
We look at online platforms as predominantly for information gathering and finding fun clubs. On the rare occassion, we find a couple that vibes and piques our interest, but we would never rely on this site or others
Catshit can often carry Toxoplasma Gondii which causes toxoplasmosis and is associated with a variety of mental diseases.
Lol, Ed. I feel like everyone who has done a few FFMs has a couple nightmare stories. They might be the most sought-after thing in the LS, but honestly they are incredibly overrated in my view. The single women that tend to be into them ar…
I'm generally more horned up in the morning or early afternoon, but haven't observed a monthly or weekly cycle.
Depends a lot on the couple and personalities involved, but generally going to a club is going to be the option I recommend. It controls for more variables and let's you spectate if you aren't quite ready to try something.
Did you change your profile pic?
We've had people's relationship implode prior to a scheduled date, but that is even worse.
Fuck bro, if I'm still alive at 60, that is a win.
That doesn't sound too out of the ordinary to me. We go to 2 events every year that are always at the same hotel, but they never advertise the location. They reveal it to registered attendees only. Likewise, in the UK there are a few Swing…
What's your point?
" Single men are very much desired in the lifestyle, probably now more than I've ever seen. But the poor behavior of many single guys is the cause of their lack of success." Yeah, no.
People overall are a bit undereducated about kink and BDSM in general. The top vs dom distinction is a tough one for some to grasp
Online is just bizarro world. It's hard to put my finger on it but it tends to make people generally both more hyperselective and hypercritical. We have pretty much ruled out online approaches entirely. It's just not worth the hassle, and…
This is not uncommon for those new to the LS I'd venture thisbis primarily a psychological/anxiety driven phenomenon, but I'm going to suggest something I haven't heard anyone mention yet: Try playing during the morning or early afternoon.…
In our area, there are clubs that are known to be more cliqueish/elitist and those for the more average and inviting. You really just got to go with no particular outcome in mind and find out for yourself.
As with any walk of life, different milieus and factions exist within swinging. I'll caveat that with saying there is something about the internet that elevates selectivity (specifically in women). In normal life I (the man of the couple)…
1 word? Damn, that's a lot.. lol
I personally don't think SMs should bother with the LS at all, unless they look like they came out of a fantasy.
I guess we assume if they are for sure not interested, we don't need to see their profile continue to pop up. Just block. It's also a better approach to saying no than saying nothing as well. Basically, it is just a filtering tool.
"Why make a profile" A question we've grappled with ourselves.
Seems pretty plain to me. Don't bother contacting them; they will contact you (aka they definitely won't).
The private image request is almost certainly an app user. It's easy to accidentally send them on that.
At the end of the day, presuming people on a site and in a lifestyle that resolves around sex with others might just possibly be interested in sex with others shouldn't be treated like some porn informed fantasizing.
Fair enough, but just because someone said they saw something doesn't mean they did. What you are purporting doesn't pass a reasonable smell test. A person responding "but in this video I saw once..." would suggest a person conpletely bere…
Rather than speaking in allusions, can you be substantive for a moment. Rather than referring to some ubiguitous porn brained guy and their nondescript expectations and behaviors, state what you think these guys supposedly expect and behav…
"Guys have warped expectations due to porn" is clueless boomer talk. Dating apps have pretty much tanked men's prospects and standards. Most dudes are ready to sign their soul away for rather mid (and I'm being generous here) women. If I w…
Sounds like you should have just sent a grunt and gesticulation from those nonsequitur responses. Good to know SLS continues to be a useless site, populated by the barely functioning illiterate.
I'd treat it as if they were a straight man and not interested in dudes. Or your average woman on a dating app... also not interested in dudes.
"Try posting a hot date" lololol
The instances of someone looking at another profile and thinking "I bet my friend would like this, let me share it with them" has to be exceedingly low. It may have happened once in a movie.
Nope, I wouldn't consider that polyamorous because couplehood has primacy. To me, polyamory has the self as the center.
Reading everyone's methodologies is illuminating and explains why this site is such a waste of time.
Reading everyone's methodologies is illuminating and explains why this site is such a waste of time.
Hard to get a current cert in the middle of a dryspell.
Ambivalent. Mine aren't erroneous, but I appreciate the thought, I guess. On the other hand, an ear nibble provides a first class ticket me to shiver town.
Go to hot dates. Events are posted for a plethora of clubs. Weed through them and pick one where the vibe seems more you.
SOS room at the Korral is good for that. I'd say maybe 4 couples can comfortably do the thing in there. I vaguely remember the Korral having orgy themed nights, but it has new (better, IMHO) management, and I don't know if they still have…
Sounds like an app user. It is absurdly easy to send pic requests on that.
We don't really have a hard and fast rule about parties, aside from making sure to talk and check-in prior to any engagement. We do have a same room rule and approach the LS more as a couple rather than two individuals. As such, we gravita…
Also, the post prior to mine is unfathomable cucked. "Keep going to events so you can be increasingly frustrated and feel inadequate while your wife gets railed, bro. That's what a real man would do. Raaaaaaawr!" Ridiculous.
The reality of the sexual dynamics is that women, on average, are going to have far more options than men (heteronormatively speaking). That disparity bound to cause resentment if the wife of the couple always gets into fun while the guy j…
We've got a large block list. People being unresponsive is probably the top block reason. Being boring or nasty/rude is probably a close second.
I've seen crazier shit at kink conventions. Definitely not my thing, but go for it.
Unless you fit into a niche or are exceedingly attractive, online approaches are a complete waste of time for single men. Whether we are talking SLS, Tinder, 3Fun, or something else, trying to find fun people interested in you is like sear…
Hard disagree that men don't care what others think. They are just as prone to self-image issues and validation seeking. Many have been thoroughly fucked up by social media.
Smiling is overrated. If you look goofy and unnatural smiling, don't do it in pictures
Doesn't matter if you drink a lot during fast days, your body will be in gluceoneogenises mode and water is one of the byproducts of that. It's absolutely water weight being lost.
I didn't really see it as bitching either, nor is it bad to air grievances in my view. Beats just suppressing frustration. But yeah the 10 certs thing does make it harder to sympathize.
Did the OP nuke their account?
10 certs in less than 4 years definitely makes me want to break the mini violin out a bit, but ultimately I still feel ya. Every one of those certs likely had a ridiculous amount of rejection and work behind them. For us, online approaches…
If a buddy is just recording, it can be fun, but actually being on set with some slimeball barking orders and camera guys up in my business... seems more like a job and less fun.
Wingcucks are insufferable bores who have supplanted individual personality with algorithmically induced political autism.
Which club? We've been to a number of them in PA and could probably give you an idea of trends
Online still remains the absolute worst way to meet people unless you fit a very specific niche/fetish or are exceedingly attractive.
Having a bunch of guidelines up front just to chat and see if there is chemistry is way more insane than people ignoring those guidelines, imho.
Profile makes you appear fun and approachable to us. You are in an area that is something of a LS hotspot. Not sure why you wouldn't be getting traction or interest. People on this site seem primed to pass for some reason.
@mahem. Maybe. I was taking her more personalized statement and generalizing it humorously. In other words, "respond to people that write to you" assumes people write to you (in the royal sense).
Another victim of surprise waterboarding. We've all been there brother!
Are you being serious right now?
" Answer people that have written to you.." Ha. That's quite the assumption
Seeing a lot of cope over the controversial idea that women love and seek validation.
Better advice; don't bother with it in the first place. This is like agreeing to a boxing match with both arms tied behind your back. Why put yourself at such a terrible disadvantage? That the LS is rife with gendered pricing tells you all…
Glad not everyone is so porn addled as to think they have to shave.
Never been to the Cottage. We like the Korral in Springgrove. Been to TJ's a few times but it may be too crowded for us. Anyway, we've found that the best nights tend to not be super busy nights. It is too easy to get lost in the shuffle.…
People are also way, WAAAAY more picky about appearances online vs IRL. It's why we've thrown our hands up with online approaches
Dating apps and their consequences have been a disaster for the human race
That seems pretty normal to me. You get more interest early because you are a new shiny profile people haven't seen before. Over time, most the people in the area see your profile and pass it over. I also agree that being niche is going to…
Ball's Rule more or less applies in our case. Online approaches have produced very low probability of success for us. Low enough to not bother utilizing it for finding play partners anymore. Best to find a club or event to go to.
Not really a porn guy; usually too faked up, and honestly what am I going to be able to do for a woman who has probably experienced every conceivable sex scenario. I did just see a Pennsylvania political ad, and Josh Shapiro's daughter can…
Are bisexual singles not possesive? Seems unlikely, if not counterintuitive to me. The reason we label ourselves as swingers and not poly is that we require sex that isn't between us to be casual and not imply any future obligations.
Dumb analogy. People sign up to this site for the express purpose of getting a sex pitch. It is part of the job description to be able to break bad news. The random solicitation call is entirely out of the blue.
Could be that younger people interpret smoking as including the Devil's Lettuce.
Why wouldn't they?
