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AsianMilf559

255 total posts. Showing the most recent 100.

Short Jokes

in Jokes and Funnies ·

Remember one from a Richard Pryor stand up routine. He told his wife he was leaving her and gonna find some new pussy. She replied If you had two inches more dick you'd find some new pussy here.

MM oral to please your lady??

in Men Talk ·

Had a coworker long ago that used to say, "When I'm 65 I'm gonna suck a dick and if I like it I'm really gonna be pissed off." Maybe your him?

Limerick time

in Games ·

Eat, bite, munch, hunch, gobble, nibble chew. Titty, busson, hairpie, finger fuch, screw.

fantasy fulfillment

in Fantasies ·

In the beginning she was bi curious and my fantasy was to kiss her after she went down on a another woman. It happened and was awesome.

WTF

in Open Forum ·

Well my little border collie is a killer too! Cuz if I ever lost her I'd break my heart!

WTF

in Open Forum ·

Of course I'm sensitive to price but more concerned with Quality

Double penetration

in 3-Some ·

In the past we were LS friends with two SMs. Why she didn't do them both at the same time we still wonder. Duh!

WTF

in Open Forum ·

For Halloween this year I'm going to put a potato in my shorts and go as a Dicktator!

WTF

in Open Forum ·

Heard a story long ago about a woman who made gravy from her breast milk for her guests. Is that the same?

Limerick time

in Games ·

Eat, bite, munch, hunch... Gobble, nibble chew... Titty, Busom, hair pie... Finger, fuck screw

Short Jokes

in Jokes and Funnies ·

What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson? It's the location of the "Dirt Bag"

Limerick time

in Games ·

I don't smoke no dope I don't chew no rope I don't dance, prance, romance, fight, fart, fuck off, shoot the shit or drive a truck. I been to maine, spain, Spokane, been around the world three time. Been ta two world fairs I've even seen go…

Getting her to try the lifestyle

in Getting Started ·

Once, before we got into LS we were out for dinner. Had about a half hour wait. We were texting back and forth goofing off. There were three really good looking girls working the desk. I texted her, "Which one would you like to take home w…

How to convince my wife

in Swinger Advice ·

Just bring up the subj can cause a serious rif in a relationship. Don't believe "Convince" is the right word either. Question is ... is she interested in the LS and how to find out in a non threatening way. A way that I heard once was to p…

MM oral to please your lady??

in Men Talk ·

Knew a guy long age that used to say, "When Im 65 I gonna suck a cock, and if I like it Im gonna be really pissed." We all though he was just joking. Maybe!

Short Jokes

in Jokes and Funnies ·

What does the Unabomer and a 16 year old girl from rural Indiana have in common? They both got fingered by their brother.

Short Jokes

in Jokes and Funnies ·

What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner? It's the location of the "Dirtbag"

How to convince my wife

in Swinger Advice ·

Really think using the word "Convince" gets folks all worked up. Do believe there are guys on here seeking info on how to broach the subject and get a dialogue started with their wife without destroying their relationship.

How to convince my wife

in Swinger Advice ·

Thats gotta be scarry for a guy to ask of his wife. It's like lighting a fuse. Theres gonna be a bang of some kind. I think the best way is to covertly plant the seed and see what happens.

Rimming

in Fantasies ·

Oh yeah! She balance a full bottle of beer on her tongue. For real...

Rimming

in Fantasies ·

Used to know a gal that could deep throat a cock and shove a have a shot of tongue up your ass at the same time. Oh the memories!

Sucking my 1st cock

in Fantasies ·

Used to have a coworker who used to say, "When I'm 65 I'm gonna suck a Cock, and If I like it I'm really gonna be pissed off" Think he was joking but who knows.

Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own

in Jokes and Funnies ·

These two women would get up early and go fishing. One would fish on the left bank and the other on the right bank. One of the women would always catch all the fish no matter which bank she fished on. The other lady finally asked, "What's…

First time mfm

in 3-Some ·

MFM is really a self starter. If she wants it to happen it will. Never fails.

What's your biggest kink/taboo?

in Fantasies ·

In the beginning she was bi curious and had a few wonderful experiences. My kink was to french kiss her after she had enjoyed some sweet pussy. Happened once. Awesome!

What's your biggest kink/taboo?

in Fantasies ·

In the beginning she was bi curious and had a few wonderful experiences. My kink was to french kiss her after she had enjoyed some sweet pussy. Happened once. Awesome!

Convincing Her?

in Getting Started ·

I think what the original poster means is how to make a SO feel comfortable swinging. My answer would be to communicate.

Bareback.

in Fantasies ·

During all our play time we insisted on condoms for the other guy. We spent a lot of time with a single guy and got very comfortable and trusting with him. The last time we met up with him he told us that he was moving out of state. So thi…

cuckold couples

in 3-Some ·

Just another way to put labels on people. Sex between consenting adults, for what ever reason, is just sex between consenting adults. We don't need the labels. We occasionally invite another guy into our relationship because I (Him) am now…

What's your biggest kink/taboo?

in Fantasies ·

I guess my biggest kink was to french kiss my milf after she't eaten pussy. That happened a few times until she gave up the bi thing. Think about it. Yum Yum. Still miss that.

What's your biggest kink/taboo?

in Fantasies ·

I guess my biggest kink was to french kiss my milf after she't eaten pussy. That happened a few times until she gave up the bi thing. Think about it. Yum Yum. Still miss that.

What's your biggest kink/taboo?

in Fantasies ·

I guess my biggest kink was to french kiss my milf after she't eaten pussy. That happened a few times until she gave up the bi thing. Think about it. Yum Yum. Still miss that.

What's your biggest kink/taboo?

in Fantasies ·

I guess my biggest kink was to french kiss my milf after she't eaten pussy. I happened a few time until she gave up the bi thing. Think about it. Yum Yum. Still miss that. Is that kinky enough?

What's your biggest kink/taboo?

in Fantasies ·

I guess my biggest kink was to french kiss my milf after she't eaten pussy. I happened a few time until she gave up the bi thing. Think about it. Yum Yum. Still miss that. Is that kinky enough?

cuckold couples

in 3-Some ·

Our past swingtime in the beginning was never really hardcore. The sex was definitely hardcore but we didn't play that often. We met and played with couples and a few SMs occasionally. Then I (him) had a fight with cancer. I won that fight…

Multiple Guys Fantasy

in Fantasies ·

In the past we alternated between two SMs for MFM. Why we didn't invite both at the same time we can't really explain. Both were larger than average and both did her well. Now we desire two SMs to join us. Hope to make that happen soon.

Fun Facts

in Open Forum ·

Yeah! They've got a good line of shit. I like the part where your SSN will be suspended.

Fun Facts

in Open Forum ·

I mean that if grandma tries to put $1,000 on an itunes card they should know somethings wrong.

Fun Facts

in Open Forum ·

I'm sure that these stores that sell those gift cards know that the scammers are using them to scam people. I'd think they would put up a warning sign.

Fun Facts

in Open Forum ·

Got a phone call at 6:30 this morning from the fake IRS scammers. I usually don't answer my land line. I just let the machIne record all the BS calls then call back the real ones. But this am I just thought I'd fuck with them a little. The…

Fun Facts

in Open Forum ·

This doesn't fit FFs but its funny. Well to me anyway. Years ago I bought a puppy from a local breeder. Named him Lucky. About a year later I saw the breeder in the local supermarket. He was in the check out line about 5 or 6 lines down. S…

Fantasy .

in 3-Some ·

For Tappinit... We've done this but using a dildo as the other guy. I too wouldn't care for the face to balls contact either. I guess if she layed on her side and he was doing her from behind you could lick her from the other side. Hopeful…

Guns Guns and More Guns

in Politics ·

FYI... It does have a single shot direct fire round also. The baton rounds have multiple rounds usually 5.

Guns Guns and More Guns

in Politics ·

I've used the 40mm launcher in the past. Only in training. Never had opportunity to use in a situation but did see it deployed for real. It's not a direct fire weapon. The round, either wood or rubber, are to be skipped off the floor/groun…