Jokes and Funnies
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Short Jokes
Rule: One short joke per post. I used to be in a band called "Lost Dog" ... you've probably seen our posters.
by VicSoCal360replies30,233viewsBad funny pickup lines. Add your own.
Are you my pinky toe? Cause I’m going to bang you of furniture all over the place!
by ne14funw35m22replies4,386viewsFunny Firsts
Last night my wife and I hosted our very first foursome ;) Of course we had a couple of NO SHOWS ); but we had a good time anyway...
by Jonandchar4replies2,758viewsBest Worst Pickup Lines
Are you the Tower of Babel? Because you are stacked in defiance of God and when you go down I can't speak coherently.
by ionsawmill8replies1,472viewsMrs Breakthru favorite time of day
Q: What's Mrs. Breakthru's favorite time of day? A: Dicks O' Cock! Bah-dump-tish!
0replies839viewsVanilla World Mistakes
Anyone else get so used to just letting loose and enjoying life at swinger parties and events all the time that you finally go out to a "regular" bar and have a couple drinks and…
by sexxyjessy698replies1,312viewsCool but useless facts.
An owl can fly without making a sound. A flea can jump 150 times its body length which is equivalent to a human being able to jump 1000 feet. Penguins and vultures are monogamous…
by VicSoCal162replies14,794viewsAs a girl who likes anal.
It was really disappointing flying all the way to Iowa to find out that it’s a *caucus.*
6replies3,608viewsTHANKSGIVING
IF THE SETTLERS HUNTED BOBCAT INSTEAD OF TURKEY WE ALL WOULD BE EATING PUSSY FOR THANKS GIVING
by splat3replies1,412viewsDoes FUCK AROUND AND FIND OUT have a different meaning in the LS?
Seems like it should.
3replies1,273viewsAunt Ava in Germany
The more your mother and father tell you you’re beautiful. The less likely it is to be true.
by Dear_diary0replies236viewsJokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
Rick is in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him " Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200…
by DestinFlCp1,008replies180,315viewsFavorite Quotes
My smart uncle (we all have one, don't we?) gave me a gift once of a copy of Bartlett's Book Of Quotations, saying "Here, now you don't have to think for yourself." We all have so…
by Inlove1957164replies30,011viewsThere once was a man from Nantucket
All I know is There once was a man from Nantucket who's d... was so long he could suck it. can anyone add
by monkeys24244replies12,036viewsIKEA
Friend of mine went into labor and had her baby in IKEA. They’re debating whether to name the child Sörlinn or Bevjät.
by ionsawmill0replies464viewsAnyone ever hear of Sodium Lauryl Sulfate
It is in toothpaste and abbreviated SLS. Leads to some funny headlines, my favorite being: What is SLS and Why Does It Make Things Taste Funny? When I saw it, I was pretty sure I…
by Shades7142replies950viewsFood Sex
Ok. Let's play a little game. Give me something you might say at a family dinner that would also be appropriate during sex. Go!
75replies7,257views- 0replies945views
Best Quotes From Other Members
There are some really clever and funny members on here. From profiles, forum or chat, what are some of your favorite quotes you've seen/read from others you've come across on here?
by calcanfun21replies778viewsFunniest thing you heard today?
With today's news being so dim and glum, thought it would be nice to hear (ok see) the funniest thing you heard or seen today..
32replies5,525viewsDp etiquette
So a week ago my buddy and I went to a party long story short I got invited in a room by a couple being the good friend I am I decided to Invite my buddy. The hot wife of the coup…
by Biganstrong4replies2,655viewsJapanese Sex
Japanese Sex: Japanese couple in an argument over ways of highly erotic sex Husband: Sukitaki. Wife replies: Kowanini!! Husband says: Toka a anji rodi roumi yakoo! Wife on her kne…
by NineFiveDeep0replies1,123viewsThe divorce
A husband and wife get a divorce. The wife is worth a lot of money but forgets to take the ex husband off of her accounts. In her will she requests that ALL of her money be buried…
by ReadyToGo2199replies5,034viewsI feel bad for laid off men during this pandemic
They're losing $1.00 for every $.79 I'm losing.
2replies1,064viewsDp etiquette
So a week ago my buddy and I went to a party long story short I got invited in a room by a couple being the good friend I am I decided to Invite my buddy. The hot wife of the coup…
by Biganstrong1replies1,965viewsCopypasta pickup from a professional writer (Chimney Sweep Of Fucking)
Since people seem to have a hard time with their online dating "game" I have decided to help out the less creative writers with their copy-paste messages and compose one for them…
by AshlaBogan1replies1,150viewsSex parties
Hello all, I'm fairly new and want to go to a party in the Rhode Island area, can anyone please help me? Its extremely discouraging, any and all help is greatly appreciated.
by Filthyhubcpl1replies2,490views