Favorite Quotes

A man convinced against his will

Is of the same opinion still?

Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.

• Martin Eugene Mull

Not all who wander are lost.

I had a friend in high school (back in the early 80s) and he thought this one girl was the most beautiful girl in the world.
Every time he was with us and he saw her (we lived in a town of 5000 so we saw each other alot). he would say.
"I would drag my balls across two miles of broken glass just to suck the guy who fucked her so I could just taste her".

I always wanted to come up with a smart ass reply but could never come up with one.

Then one day out of the blue he said it again, and totally improved I said "I wouldn't go that far...maybe a mile or mile and a half". Everyone lost it.

"Son, you're good but you didn't do one damn thing funny."

Uncle Dave Macon to Earl Scruggs after his debut on the Grand Ole Opry circa 1948

My Karen's favorite: "Suck It Up Buttercup!"
My Favorite: When the weather's Hot and sticky, It's no time for Dunking Dickie.
But when the Frost is on the Pumpkin, then it's time for Dickie Dunking!"

“Ah, yes, divorce … from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.”

Robin Williams

First full day of Autumn today. "When the frost is on the Pumpkin that's the time for dickie dun ken". Let the dun ken begin.

Well because I'm a nerd... (Bonus points if you know)
"I mean to confound these buggers <takes a drink> I Aim to Misbehave"

ISRAEL MOSSAD quote, "When the enemy is coming to kill you, get up early and kill them".

I heard this toast many years ago. I wasn't old enough to drink or know exactly what it meant, I think the profanity is what burned it to memory.

The day is long; The pay is small
Live long; and F&(k them all

"The world isn't flat or round. It's fucked". Rickie, from Trailer Park Boys.

“My wife and I want to try swapping. We want to go to one of those key parties where you put your keys in a bowl. But we just want to upgrade our car.”

Andy Kindler

"THE BRAIN, An amazing organ. It works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. From birth until your first erection".

Excerpts from the notebook of Lazarus Long:

"Tell her she is beautiful every day, especially if she is not"
"Rub her feet"
"Never try to teach a pig to sing, it wastes your time and annoys the pig"
"Get one shot off fast, that will startle your opponent and give you time to make the second one count"

AS written by Robert Heinlein

Plzrs, you nailed it!

Plzrs, you nailed it!

@Havingfuntogether
Lol..Life's Cycle.

Mom was so mad when she found me with a playboy, she sent me to my room to wait for my dad. I was in trouble!
My dad swung open the door and told me, "you WILL go blind!" If you keep this shit up...
I looked at him and said, "dad, I'm over here."

plz, that means going from being Liberal to being Conservatives.

We are old and wise because we survived being young and dumb.

This Month Is National Breast Appreciation Month:
Remember the slogan; “We stare because we care"

“Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. “ - Ambrose Bierce

—

“I've thought it over in the light of my 40 years' experience in legal jurisprudence, and I've come to the positive conclusion that there ain't no way to do this legal and honest.

But, being good, sensible Texans, we'll do her illegal and dishonest.”

• Edgar Buchanan - “The Comancheros”

—-

“We come into this world naked, wet and hungry.

Then, things get worse from there!“