Certs and how important??

I got a few just meeting couples at Partys . I Don,t think that is a Good reason to get a Created So I delet Them I don,t need peoples to know Who I play with Just mt two cants Worth

I have never dated anybody who came with references, and I am not about to start. There was another thread about someone contacting the people who wrote the certs, as though someone were applying for a job, and they were checking references.

No thank you. We neither provide nor accept certs.

The funny thing about certs , we looked for them at first and most where older certs like 2016 . everyone of those guys turned out to be picture collectors or no shows, then we met one with no certs . He rocked her world and was very nice guy considering he was only 22. It seems like the older guys are either married or just want pics to spank it to now days. At least in our area! For 5 weeks being back on here ,I guess out of 30 or so guys most with certs flaked and 2 have been for real . Not bad odds for 5 weeks I guess. still looking for a repeat person not just one night stands . But most SM are not true lifestylers ., there just looking for sex!!!

We like the group chat for many reasons. First, it allows us to get exposed to both personalities which in important since we're looking for a couple and we all need to have a connection. Doesn't seem like there's much point in just talking to one half of a couple. We like to make sure they can hold a conversation. All too often we've just gone to meet people out only to find ourselves having to painfully draw conversation out of the people sitting across from us as they do nothing more than blink with a blank stare at us. As far as it being easier for everyone to be aware of what's going on with a single account, we only group chat so naturally both of us would know what's going on. Finally, even though we notice practically everyone says it now, we truly are looking for new friends in an out of the bedroom and not just booty calls. We enjoy talking to our friends every once in a while.

Exactly Hiwayrider.. exactly!

We've been with couples and guys that refuse to accept certs. Being very attractive and great at sex, they don't need the "advertising" of certs. That's confidence, as I see it.

There's that 'too many' phrase again......

I resisted them for years as most just said “showed up” then allowed and gave them but they seem flat . When anyone has too many, they seem transactional, or don’t care lets fuck most I have met here, and really enjoyed have none or only a couple. Anyway, if you communicate and better vEtte you can still find great matches. Just saying . . .

NVPMWDN Club: where the cool kids hang out

Every once in a while, even a blind squirrel finds a nut ;-)

BT

Excellent breakdown BT!

So...for SMs:

Having no certs is ok.

Not having certs is not ok.

Asking for certs is weird and uncouth, but no one has addressed having them offered to you after play by SFs or couples. Friends tell me that happens sometimes.

Having too many certs (though, what qualifies as “too many” is undefined) gives you the right to brag...which probably qualifies you for entry into the Not Very Picky-Man Whore/Douche Nozzle Club.

And lastly, as always, none of these rules apply to certs for couples or SFs. Nor should they, in all honesty.

So, just to simplify things, I guess I’m going with what UPinMichigan is saying ;-)

BT

I don't know, a single guy with a ton of certs probably have reason to be a bit high on himself.

Certs defiantly help me in attracting other couples and singles ladies!

I think it's very simple.

For some people certs are important and for others they aren't. So it is up to you to determine who you are trying to attract with your profile - those that would be interested in reading cert and look for them? Or those that are not interested in them.

I think asking for certs is the weird part of it all. just imagine we have sex, it's can be amazing, bad, or in between... Then I send you a text the next day "Hey can you go on SLS and leave a review"

Not only does the woman need to be the one running SLS, but she also has to let the world know you slept together and then type of a report of what you're like. This would be like getting a job, leaving the interview and coming back the next day and asking for a referral to another job.

Then you have certs... People won't say "Oh there are some certs, he's who he says he is." Nope. They'll read your certs, go to the profile of the person who wrote it, go in their pics to see if they are attractive enough for THEM to take that cert serious, then go in their certs to make sure they are valid enough to validate certs...

Like, couldn't you have just asked me by now? You mean you see pics you like, read a profile you like, and then take a complete strangers "certification" over talking with them yourself? Let it sway you to or away from them? Then walk into a party/event and meet another stranger and don't require nor care about any of that stuff... It seems crazy to me. It goes message, phone, meet for me. If I can't verify in those 3 methods, certs isn't going to get me there

FWIW - I saw it at a Christmas Tree Shoppes store and had to have it.

Mayhem - great coffee cup! Might be better than the one of mine that says "Insanity is inherited - you get it from your kids."

Hotluvrs - I have a coffee mug that says "I don't need Google. My wife knows everything." ;-)

Calcan wrote:

“ None of us are right, and none of us are wrong. On the lack of separate chat, I think that falls more on a trigger issue for us. Simply because, we've been duped too many times into just the husband chatting.”

That is not correct.

My wife is right.

I am usually wrong. I know this because she tells me so every day.

As to being duped by husbands, I’m sorry to hear that has happened to you. That kind of thing will certainly change your strategy going forward.
We’ve had the similar experiences, but it hasn’t happened for years. If we are doing a video chat, we want to have a very clear View of both parties, and even then, we don’t agree to do anything more than meetNgreet.

All of these discussions are just a reminder of why we tend to skip the hassle just go to parties and clubs.

By the way, the last time I even looked at certs was last year when looking for a few single guys to attend our party. We are still relatively new to the area. Once we are more established and familiar with some local and reliable guys I doubt that I’ll be relying on certs.

Onehourcouple - Spot on.
sexynovacpl112 - For us, we meet a little differently. Separate meets require (for us) some extra Sounds like you have your situation figured out pretty well. Right on.

All these stories about issues with communications before meeting is why we don't take much stock in these communications and just meet people in-person in a public place, zero expectations, and we can enjoy the rest of the evening there if someone's a no-show or if connecting with us doesn't work out for whatever reason. Our profile is descriptive enough for people to get a good idea what to expect. We started out with the usual "phone interviews" and the like and she found them incredibly awkward most of the time. People she's never met asking her for details about her sexual life, our relationship, etc. etc., so we ditched all that. We know, our approach takes longer at the start and some couples won't do it this way, but we're not in such a hurry that we want to deal with all this. We meet most people at parties and nearby swinger/nudist resorts, so we don't have to depend on this site as our only avenue to connect with others. We just moved to a new city a few months back and already have made enough connections this way that we'll probably let our membership here terminate when it's expired next month.

Since we've been with SLS we learned that certs isn't everything, especially with single males. Experienced single males with lot of certs can come with a high degree of arrogance.

We get it, you think you're a stud with all those certs and you probably are but it doesn't excuse you to be rude.

Hotluvrs,You wrote:
"We have been in contact with couples like yourselves who insist on group chats with each person having individual accounts."

Why is the separate accounts important to you?

We decided long ago to both use the same LS handle, accounts, email and phone number.

We did this to make transparency that was present between us obvious to anyone we meet. Neither of us has any problem with the other speaking one on one , and there have been occasions when we decided to share our real personal phone numbers. That is , however, the exception not the rule. As far as new friends are concerned speaking to one is speaking to both.

One account also makes it far easier to keep each other updated on any developments, as all emails go to both of our computers and phones.

It works well for us.

hotluvrs - I think we all have our own needs, desires and trigger issues. None of us are right, and none of us are wrong. On the lack of separate chat, I think that falls more on a trigger issue for us. Simply because, we've been duped too many times into just the husband chatting. Given the option, many of those husbands have been perfectly fine chatting separate with the Mrs., but not OK with his Mrs. chatting separate with the Mr. We don't care what your needs, desires or concerns are. Just don't be a fucking hypocrite.