Short Jokes
You know back in my day BLOWING A TRANNY meant you were having car TROUBLE .
john33415
82 total posts. Showing the most recent 81.
Short Jokes
3 OLD LADIES ARE SITTING ON A PARK BENCH WHEN A GUY WALKS UP TO THEM WEARING A TRENCHCOAT ,SUDDENLY OPENS THE COAT TO REVEAL HE'S NAKED THE FIRST LADY AS A STROKE THE SECOND LADY WAS A STROKE THE THIRD LADY COULD NOT REACH.
Short Jokes
What do a BURNT PIZZA ,A FROZEN BEER ,and a PREGNANT LADY have in common? SOMEONE FORGOT TO PULL OUT
Short Jokes
A sign in front of a brothel said BEAT IT WERE CLOSED
Short Jokes
Fishing and Boobies have a lot in common , even the small ones are fun to play with.
Short Jokes
Butt plugs are fun until you need to fart and you shoot the CAT
Short Jokes
What are those little bumps around a woman's Nipple ? Braille say's suck here.
Short Jokes
Whats the meaning of TGIF tongue goes in first
Short Jokes
How to finger a girl ??? Start with your Tongue...
Short Jokes
One for the ladies Whats the one thing you should say during sex??? OUCH
Short Jokes
Why do women rub the eyes when they wake up in the morning??? Because they don't have balls to scratch...
Turning the big 70 what should a guy with ed treat himself too
Windowed 15 years ,turning 70 in July ,any ideas???
Short Jokes
Whats the difference between a HUSBAND and a LOVER??? About 45 minutes
Short Jokes
Why don't women wear miniskirts in the winter??? They will get chapped lips,
Who like to be Watched?
Would love to find a couple near me that likes to be watched . I could even take pics for you!!!
Short Jokes
Whats the difference between a potato and a Jewish Boy??? A POTATO GETS TO KEEP ITS SKIN
Short Jokes
Dildos are GREAT Vibrators are FUN But nothing can beat the almighty TONGUE
Short Jokes
Whats the difference between a refrigerator and a butt hole? The refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull the meat out !!!
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
A husband asked his wife honey whats the difference between a peeping tom and a pickpocket? Wife didn't know . A pick pocket snatches your watch a peeping tom watches your snatch.
Lost Underwear!
My wife would loose her panties after every time we played at someone eleses house ,I would clip them to the car antenna for the ride home .
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
A womans asshole is like a 9 volt battery. You know it's wrong but your eventually going to stick your tongue on it!!!
Short Jokes
Mommy Daddy what are you doing? We are making you a little brother or sister. Can you do it doggystyle I'd rather have a puppy.
Short Jokes
When I'm at the grocery store I always look for the cashier I'm most likely to have sex with. Yes I end up at the self checkout .
Video Calling
First if I were to get a video call I would need time to maybe look at a profile before answering .Second I spend a lot of computer time on sls but may be on the other side of the house , a ringer to alert of a incoming call would be nice.
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
A guy ask's his wife ' honey does my junk look like a clock" wife say no honey Well it would if you put 2 hands and a face on it .
Women squirting - yea or neh?
I was seeing a older woman (70+) we discovered she could squirt. Before we would start a play session she always peed and we would shower together. I would always cover the bed with a shower curtain and a sheet , We would go to town ,somet…
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
What is 6.9 ??? A good time ruined by a period
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How do you tell horney woman from a hungry woman? Placement of the cucumber.
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A guy goes into a $10.00 brothel gets services and leaves ,a week latter his back raising hell with the madam ,he got crabs from the girl. The madam replies "what do you want for $10.00 LOBSTER.
Short Jokes
teacher asked little Johnny _What comes after 69 Johnny's answer was MOUTHWASH she kicked him out .
Short Jokes
Found a sticker on the back of gfs car---IF YOUR GOING TO RIDE MY ASS AT LEAST PULL MY HAIR
Food Sex
Must be jelly ,jam doesn't shake like that!
Short Jokes
A little girl starts school and befriends a little boy ,they do everything together even have the same lunch every day ,a chicken sandwich. every day a chicken sandwich for lunch ,years go by and still a chicken sandwich. One day the girl…
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
A guy returns to his hometown after 20 years away, one night he is in a bar having a few and he spots his old high school sweetheart, they get a table and start chatting and drinking.Three hours latter they are both silly drunk, she says y…
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Why does Santa have such a BIG SACK ? Because he only cums once a year.
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My grandma just asked my pregnant niece " If the stork delivers babies ,what bird prevents a pregnancy? She did not know . Grandma says THE SWALLOW
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NEWS ALERT*****There is a critical shortage of tampons in America ,due to the rising amount of Pussies here.
Keeping you cock and balls hairless
Instead of shaving cream I use Hair Conditioner keeping it wet for a few minutes before.
A lot of smokers
I quit smoking,drinking and sex all at the same time, it was the worst 15 minutes of my life.
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
Why did the Burger King knock up the Diary Queen? He forgot to wrap his whopper.
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
A little boy comes home from school one day ,his dad asks son how was school today? The boy replies Great I has sex with the teacher,thats one proud papa. the next day as the son is leaving for school dad asks son are you going to sex with…
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
Give a man a fish he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish and you get to bang his wife every weekend !!!
BBW who loves them
First of all let me say that I lost my virginity with a bbw and I took hers also. I think I was 17 at the time she was a year younger we were under the boardwalk in Long Beach NY ,We got together about a year ago,she as here on a vacation…
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
What does Popeye use as lubricant? Olive Oyl
The Dick Sucker Club.
A few years ago when I was on aff there was group in Pompano Beach ,does anyone know if its still active and how to get a invite ?
Daytona Threesome
Wish in one hand poop in the other lest see witch one fills up first!!!
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
LIFE is like toilet paper. Your either on a roll OR taking crap from someone .
Short Jokes
Whats the difference between a husband and a lover? About 90 minutes
BI couples with no pics of the guys.
Why is it not many couples have any pics of the men . We don't need cock pics ,just something to peek our interest.
Short Jokes
Whats the difference between a wife and a lover? Daytime Nighttime
Short Jokes
how does a blond turn the lights on after sex? She opens the car door .
Short Jokes
Mary and Joe bought a new SUV ,Mary keep saying she wanted to have sex in the back while driving around town ,so I said lets go. Joe stay off main street its under construction!!!
What do you find sexier?
The fun starts by unwrapping a present !!!
The Dick Sucker Club.
Short of going to a abs (witch I don't like to do) its almost impossible !!!
Bareback
I have only bottomed once and it was bareback ,the guy could not believe I was virgin as I moved around and ground on him as the women I ass fucked did to me .Would I do it again ,HELL yea!!!!
giddy cock rings
As we all age thing don't work as well as they did when we were younger , just wondering if anyone has tried the Giddy cock ring and do they work as advertised . They are rather expensive just to try . Did it keep you hard and could your w…
giddy cock rings
As we all age thing don't work as well as they did when we were younger , just wondering if anyone has tried the Giddy cock ring and do they work as advertised . They are rather expensive just to try . Did it keep you hard and could your w…
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
How does a blond turn the light on after having sex ? NO OFFENSE LADIES I MARRIED A BLOND she opens the car door
cock rings
Has anyone tried the Giddy rings ? Do they work as claimed or are they a overpriced gimmick.
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
Shortly after getting married I started to notice the wife has started putting some powder in my undershorts ,I thought that was very nice of her. When I thanked her for the baby powder she started to laugh ,its not baby powder its MIRACLE…
are there outward sings to indicate the LS if out in a non LS club?
on amazon just search SWINGLIFESTYLE and the goods pop up
Is swallowing hard?
Before I started sucking cocks the wife suprised me with a cum kiss to share ,I thought that was the HOTTEST after that I went to creampies mine and a fuck buddy's . Then she wanted to see more ,and as the saying goes "happy wife happy lif…
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
Mary and Joe are a young couple that just got married ,don't have much money and are trying to set up there first apt together so they hit up a few yard sales when they see one. Joe came home one night with a old dirty antique mirror . Aft…
Strangest or most unusual place you've had sex
under the boardwalk in longbeach first time for both of us and we learned a good lesson we brought a blanket the 2nd time .
THANKSGIVING
A woman goes into Wallmart and is looking at the turkeys . She sees a guy putting out more meats so she goes up to him and asks ,son do these turkeys get any bigger? The guy responds NO LADY THERE DEAD!
I surrendered my body completely
Like myself at that age was straight,wasn't til I got myself into a 3some and the guy started going down on me and I liked it ,his wife started sucking him off and brought me into it and rite away I took over giving him head .I would like…
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have you heard about the woman who swallowed a razor blade ? she gave herself a tonsillectomy,a mastectomy,a hysterectomy and circumcised 3 guys on the block
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Whats the difference between a husband and a lover? ABOUT 90 MINUTES
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
A farmer runs to this neighbors farm and complains to the farmer there kids could no longer play together. the guy confused asked why not ? I went behind my barn today and there written in the snow with pee was your sons name so what ,we a…
Is noise a turn on
Oh this bring back memories of my first screamer,up to this point in the ls about a year yes all the normal moaning and grunting with some dirty talk thrown in . Then we meet this one great sexy couple ,the first time she orgasmed she let…
Pineapples
Sounds like the whole pineapple thing must have been started by DOLE to boost sales,LOL
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
when we were first married we had house sex ,all over the house kitchen,living room ,bathroom,garage,everywhere. 5 years later it was just bedroom sex ,dont get me wrong its still good. now married 10 years we have hall sex ,we pass each o…
Strangest or most unusual place you've had sex
in the ocean at haulover beach and again at playalinda beach,in a hot tub in a condo community in the keys , in the rest room at a nudist resort
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Why is it when people see my pregnant wife they want to rub her belly ,no one ever wanted to rub my balls saying good job buddy!
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BUTT PLUGS ARE ALL FUN AND GAMES UNTIL YOU FART AND SHOOT THE CAT
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
Jim goes to his girlfriends house one nite and they start fooling around ,out of nowhere she tells him she's tired to his beard and he should go shave it off. He says he can't that his wife loves his beard ,well she was having none of it a…
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
3 Guys are have lunch at the country club ,one says he owned a clothing store that did very well until on day there was a fire ,the insurance company paid the 3 million dollars so he retired. the 2nd guy said he owned a 5 star restaurant ,…
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A truckers wife sees 3 parrots for sale .$170.00 ,$150.00 & $10.00 She asked the store owner why is the last one so cheap? The pet store owner said it used to live in a whore house the cops busted. The women laughs & buys it anyway. She ge…
Prostate massager
I know my profile says straight ,but like most guys my age with pussy getting harder to get and Mr.Happy not acting like he did a few years ago I got curious so I ordered a prostate massager any suggestions before I try it on my own?
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
Whats the difference between a husband and a lover? about 4 inches
Jokes and Funnies feel free to add your own
Whats the difference between a wife and a lover DAYTIME NIGHTTIME