I mentioned this in one of the other posts, some friends of ours pay when they're actively looking for an extra guy for her. For years we did the same thing: paid when we were active, were free when life got too busy. Some free members were paid but let their membership go when they found out they are pregnant. Or have medical problems. But pay again at a later date. Why should their account be deleted?
Block free member if they bug you so much.
Back in the olden days, one of the advertising tactics was to attract free members as a place they could participate.
Some free members are pains in the ass, some are not bad.
WaupacaWildOnes, this topic has been covered repeatedly, if you dont care for free members, skip/delete them, its like changing the channel on the TV, this site used to have free and different length trial memberships, not everyone decides to join or leave right away, we are now life members, but we went from free to 3 month to 6 month to 3 month to free memberships first. Some take a bit longer to pull the trigger than others.
We are life time members.....I have talked to other paying customers here and they agree why should you clutter up the system with free profiles, to me they are like BOTS. They are of no value, I do not care to see the photos or writing they post. They are are a waste of space and encourage more scams. Maybe offer a three month or even one month special fee to get them interested. STOP letting these people ruin your business by dissuading the genuinely interested people from posting. This is not just the opinion of a few people, but most will not even take the time to contact you. Can you genuinely correct this problem???
PP: I always read the hot date postings and today I observed one from a visiting SM profile that does have a recent cert and a couple of pictures BUT - when I scrolled down to read his profile he devoted a grand total of FOUR (4) lines to his description and what he’s looking for and he devoted EIGHT (8) lines to the Sydney University warning, privacy, legal action mumbo jumbo.
Ms U
My pet peeve is the "Free Ads" why even bother, you can not talk to them and they can not not talk to anyone. Serious / paid accounts only should be allowed. We spend hours on here trying to find compatible couples. If people are not serious then don't bother !!!
Sometimes someone has pictures I just enjoy. So when they come up randomly, I check them out sometimes.
There is a profile from Pennsylvania that checks us out perhaps once a month and has for years. Dunno why.
Agree, not much more than idle cursorily for us as well. Hell, we are window shoppers!! Why pass up a look at a beautiful woman or a handsome man? Perhaps the only difference with us? If we see enough of what we like in the window, we don't mind reaching out and saying hi. Pictures are fun but lack the full dimension of a conversation over a glass or wine (her) and scotch (him).
Do we get turned down? Yep. Do we get non-answers? Yep. Do we make new connections? Yep. I guess we've been doing this long enough to no longer fret over someone saying......we are not a match. I guess we'd rather know there is no interest than sitting on the sidelines wondering if there might be interest.
While it doesn't bother me, seeing someone check out our profile daily over a period of weeks just makes you go, "Hmmmm".
I suspect this is closer to what was meant by "window shopping". This is beyond just checking out a profile and "forgetting" they did, unless the person had no short term memory like in the movie 50 First Dates.
Again, no concern. Just a curiousity, at least for us.
Don't get me wrong it's always flattering that someone checks you out, even the ones that are over 2000 miles away. We like to think they like what they see or maybe I stirred something up in a post somewhere that they wanted to read more about us or reference our profile...that's awesome...what baffles us is the ones that check us out often....please send us a word of some kind....tell us you opened pictures, you would like to meet or even if its just chat about something.
What strongly lacks in this Lifestyle specially SLS seems to be communication....
We have a one window shopper that has another profile that has reached out, sent k i k messages, face pics, made semi-sincere attempts to meet & so forth, then stopped responding for weeks, now with a weekly "what's up this weekend?" from the female, but the other profile (the window shopper) doesn't respond whatsoever. Same pics, paid account, etc., when I first noticed it I assumed they had lost the password to the first account or something, now I'm just baffled.
Why would anyone open a second paid account just to peek or window shop, but never respond? Now I'm curious, and want to pick at it like a scab, my wife keeps saying "don't attract notice from the crazies".
We have had a lot of "window shoppers" also, it used to really annoy me (husband), some you just cant explain, but I did finally realize that if one spends any time in the chat rooms or makes any comments in the forums, other people tend to check your profile for background interest, proximity and of course to check out the photos (but never seem to actually read the profile itself).
We've had some window shoppers as well. It's hard to tell the motivation. You think there's interest so reach out, but then nothing. Could be a number of reasons such as they're just too busy, shy, maybe only like the looks of one of us, etc. Though we'd LIKE an email to understand why, we realize that nobody owes anyone anything here.
Not something we take personally and it's likely clear by now that any meetings from online interactions are just icing on the cake for us at this point. I keep thinking that I'm just not going to pursue any more new people outside of LS parties, but then we pull yet another diamond out of the rough and make even more LS friends, so it's all good.
SOTW,
We've had that happen too! Never heard back from them.
We've learned that people are weird. We can only laugh at it when stuff like that happens.
@ AandJ
We had sort of the same thing happen... A couple very close to us looked at us several times a day every day for months. I looked back and saw they opened a private pic folder. I reached out to them and said hello. They did not respond. They have not looked at us since, but they still have that folder open to us today. Go figure....
AandJ - Wow, isn't that the truth! We find window shoppers highly interesting. At some point and if we enjoy the window shoppers we will just send an initial email to say hi. The responses are even more interesting. We've been enjoying this little hobby long enough to not worry about the non-responses. While on the verge of a pet peeve but only a nuisance at this point, people need to get our to the Twitter 120 character responses. Us? We'd prefer a bit more depth.
Zak,
You'd be amazed at how many people are afraid to reach out. We've had folks look at our profile pretty much daily, then finally open private pics (without telling us) and still not send a note to say hi. We finally reached out and asked what was going on and they said that was their way of letting us know.
How about the people that repeatedly checking out our profile, Sometimes done a few times in one week...... Are you that forgetful or are we that dull that you viewed us just yesterday but can't remember....or are you hinting that you want our attention to respond. How about a quick e-mail anything simple like... Hi just passing by and can't resist checking you guys out again or wish you were closer or check us out and let us know what you think.... something, anything..... Because the impression that it leaves us with is that there would be no conversation which translates to poor communication and verbal skills, a lot of awkward silence does not convert to erotic sexy moments. Lets get verbal before physical.....
NJNY
I had Slim Shady in my head too.
@Njny.
Give the band "Call Me Karizma" a listen
"Monster (Under My Bed)"
Monster, monster under my bed
Come out and play 'cause I need a friend
You're so damn close that I feel your breath
You're the only one I have left
fistbump
Its particularly annoying when it comes from someone old enough to have grandkids. Dood, you're old enough to know better, dont act like a whiny little schoolkid.
It's not as if I'm some kind of paragon of virtue either. Dumpster fire might be more appropriate. But I got here through my own decisions, my own choices. Why should I let someone else take credit for that? Its MY dumpster fire. I'm gonna wave my freak flag high.
People who repeatedly jump up and ask for help in the forums, but have no intention of following through and actually DOING something about it.
@DNLB: hi there. Thanks for sharing!
As I mentioned in my later reply, those 2 happened to be the exceptions. I am very flexible once the action starts to work with the couple's comfort. I understand that it took a lot of work for them to meet and I respect that. I am used to tag team play, usually let the lady call the shots since it is about her. I am very confident to where they didn't bother me only feeling it was poor etiquette. I learned from it and moved on.
Sorry about your (and other couples) experience with one liners SM. I want to thank them because they usually make the rest of the considerate SM shine :)
Happy swinging y'all.
CM: "Couples who decide, in the heat of an MFM moment, that they like each other's company so much o totally exclude me!"
So this has me wondering, was it a heat of the moment development, and did you give it long enough to play out?
For us, any mfm play is really mFm, as in it's all about her and what she wants. We have often engaged in more of a tag-team effort than the three way play, and it works well with a tiny effort to communicate.
Speaking of which, in the 30 minutes I've been on line today we've received 3 messages from SM: 2 that said "Good morning" and one that said "BBC fantasy", all of which got a "no thank you" response.
@MoT1974: what is weird is that the ladies were totally into me in both cases, hence the private meetings, but the hubby sorta "butted in" haha. Not sure if it was jealousy or an alpha male moment, but I never give couples reasons for that. 1st time I let them do their thing and the lady could tell I was done and we politely said our goodbyes.
Second time I told them I am not really into just watching (true, I am not a voyeur.) I offered to film them because I lost interest in playing and was going to take a shower and head to the gym. They left shortly after.
I am still shocked by that behavior because in both cases they seemed to be drama free in our public meeting but they had an 180 turn in private. It is against my nature to be rude so being put on the spot felt strange. I resolved to being direct in any future communications for 3somes of the couple expectations and my perceived role.
Contrast that with the time I had a steamy 3some with a couple and the guy approached me after and asked if the 2 of them can stay awhile and fuck like bunnies because he was so turned on by the performance! Now, how can I deny him that?!
