[LOCKED]Fakes, Flakes and Time wasters

This sounds similar to the same thing I go through on a daily basis, it's almost like talking with someone who contacts me from CL ad.
If a person contact me saying they are a couple, I would ask them certain questions and ask them to both send me a face pic holding a piece of paper with today's date on it. If they can't do that, I will give them details about a meet n greet to meet me at, if they still can't do that just a block button and move on.

I know how to deal with people who stood me up and flakes. They get scared and back off when you hit them with certain words and questions.

From time to time we get a "Couple" profile reaching out. Usually a single guy posing or a married guy who's wife has no idea what he's doing or has said no to the idea of swinging. Also, some couples profiles were real at some point in the past (certs) but they've split up or the wife/girlfriend doesn't want to swing any longer. Once we bring up the phone call to verify it's crickets after that. We never meet a couple unless they voice verify via a phone call.

Swinging 7 years ... 1st time we experienced a single guy pretending to be a couple was this past summer ... although there was a case a couple yrs ago when we got a single guy vibe from a couple... when we asked for the females to talk on the phone (which never do, but did this time due to our single guy meter going off), he got argumentative and said it was the stupidest thing he has ever heard of and then ghosted

“ 14 years swinging and we've never encountered that. So many people complain about it that it must be real, but I've never seen it myself.”

That would be another first; So many.

:-)

~Allen

Yes! I had one of those too!!!

We could easily name half a dozen on the panhandle, its a common theme. We also have an abundance of their counterparts, the "single male" who are trapped in a loveless marriage, only staying in it for the children.

It's sort of comical.

I've experienced it at least 3 times of a single guy posing as a couple.

"One things we hate is the whole single guy playing couple. Christ almighty who does that work on? Whats your end game? "Sure I'm a single guy who just lied to you, but now that we are meeting, wanna bang?""

14 years swinging and we've never encountered that. So many people complain about it that it must be real, but I've never seen it myself.

One things we hate is the whole single guy playing couple. Christ almighty who does that work on? Whats your end game? "Sure I'm a single guy who just lied to you, but now that we are meeting, wanna bang?"

We are honest and what you see is what you get. We keep our pictures updated and even our weight and age updated. We have a few older pictures to serve as a pictorial resume if you will.

We hate to be suspicious but at this point first we chat on IM, then we Kik, we need to see face pics that include a pic of you two together. Then, maybe cellphones.

The ratio of fakes and flakes to legit is sadly low.

Finally, if you are a single guy, just tell us damn it. Single guy isn't a deal breaker for us; fake is!

Only ever had one no show. Had many more simply disappear from communicating. As our profile states. We don't mess around long before setting up a date for fun. That's usually when they disappear as soon as I put them on the spot and say "let's do this on this day".
Sadly it's been single guys almost every time.

We've had it all. Our first weekend at a LS resort we met a couple whose pics were 10 years (and more teeth) out of date. We've had that happen almost routinely, enough so we now privately "age" pics based on the profile date unless they specify they're within a certain date range.

We've also had a couple show up at a meet and greet, look at us from the door, she shakes her head, and they turn around and walk out without a word. Same couple posted a Hot Date within the past month complaining "Aren't there any real people on here that will actually show up?"

They're free-range on here, and impossible to avoid entirely. Part of the experience, though, right?

Why do fakes and flakes always travel together? You never see one without the other.

Our experience of late falls more into the time wasters with a close lean to flakes than anything else. The pattern seems to follow pretty closely. 1) They initiate contact and state they'd enjoy meeting us. 2) We write back, generally within 24 hours and say sure, here are the dates we are open. 3) That is the last we hear from them. Yep they Casper the ghost us LOL.

So we can necessarily call them flakes because we never got to the time and place stage. Now they could fall into the fake category?? We've been on this site long enough to see the warning signs. 1) Very high level profile, not a lot of detail. 2) Pictures from circa 2014 that have never been updated. 3) The initial email, or now IM never contains their names.

Silly us, even with the warning signs we still write back. Why? We are actually on this site to meet people and have more than a Saturday afternoon BBQ type event with them. We generally conclude that they were actually more afraid we'd say Yes than No and that's why they Casper on us.

We’ve had some “no show - no call” couples who’ve accepted invitations to our parties. They don’t get invited again. But luckily, with a party, there are others to fill in.

In the “close but not quite what the OP asked” dept: We quit meeting couple-on-couple after we drove 90 miles to meet what seemed like a fantastic couple. We got there and met...him. He took us upstairs where his wife was, quite visibly, sick. She obviously couldn’t play, but he still wanted to play right there in front of her. We got the he!! out of there, and swore from that day on that we would only meet new couples at our parties (where others could fill-in for the flakes and wackadoodles).

I can see how someone might lose their nerve?

Had a fairly naive view of some of this until recently.

Talked to one couple on here and the woman was attractive etc... we KIK'd, talked on the phone, and I even sent her a copy of my driver's license before our planned meet (never do that again). Then she/her husband completely flaked on the meeting. Leaving me wondering just what the heck was going on, if they were real and worse; why in the H#LL did I send them a copy of my driver's license...

(I know... STUPID!) I think as a single guy you get so used to being a second class citizen that you do anything to make a couple feel comfortable before a meet; but sometimes you forget to watch out for your own safety.

Other than that, get a lot of interest in the package, lot of couples say they are interested, but I think the attention span couples have for single guys they haven't met is pretty small... Lot of interest, not many meetings.

Unlike Magnetite, we like the whole IM/chat thing. We also like to just meet for a quick coffee or cocktail, but with our schedules that can be pretty difficult, and we don’t want to give up a free weekend night. We hate to drive 40minutes just to find out that they look nothing like their profile pics.

We use KIK for chat. It has video chat capability. A two minute video chat will remove the possibility of being surprised by their appearance when they appear at the door.

We have been stood up for a second date by a couple in the lifestyle long enough to know better. We run into them occasionally but they are kind of on my shit list.

In my mind the time wasters are anyone into the whole IM/chat thing. Set up a time to meet for drinks or just forget about it. I have no time for such BS. Just meet in person and we will see if we are DTF of incompatible.

We have never had a couple that did not show up in 8 years of swinging. We usually recognize early the signs of fake or couples where one is not on board. Years of practice!!

Time wasters are a dime a dozen. Honorable mention goes to this guy
of a couple who has been contacting us for 7 years, knowing well his wife has a jealousy issue and does not play or wants him to. His last offer was to come and service our male half during the day!!

We have had once a couple that did not look anything like their profile pictures when we met them. When we asked, they simply said they used internet model pictures for discretion. They also lied just about every aspect of their lives.

We also had a couple where the woman had no idea what the date was about. You should have seen her eyes when we told her we were swingers.

We also had a guy bring a first blind date to one of our parties. She turned out to be a dominatrix and beat the shit out of him in front of everyone. That match was not made in heaven.

Finally, we have thrown 2 men and 1 woman out of the house in 8 years which is not bad at all.

You live and see!

How many of you have set up a date with a couple and got stood up? How many have set up a date with the couple and the couple showed up but was unrecognizable because they used old pics on their profile? What about those couples that set up a date with a couple but also schedule other couples to make their choice from to go on a date with while leaving you sitting there?