If someone contacts us with a detailed message with pics open and certs we give it a serious look.
If no certs we insist on the messenger to open to us a selfie holding a piece of paper saying “ Hi DD’s” …. If serious about contacting they will have no issue doing it.
If someone messages and it’s just “hi” and nothing else we delete without a second thought.
Not all Time Wasters are Fakes and Flakes.
Think some forget common courtesy under the self-imposed pressure of considering intimate relations with other. And a few are trying to be super careful after being burned.
We try to be patient as well as polite. It’s like panning for gold. You have to sift through a lot of waste before finding those precious nuggets, which can be rare depending on your standards.
Ghost you or ghosting is when someone begins connecting with you and then up and disappears. Maybe they just stop writing, maybe they don't show up and don't respond anymore- without an explanation.
Meh, it was a 5 minute bummer today as we are looking to get out for some fun this weekend. And we still are.. :)
"...and people who put ketchup on their hot dogs"
People actually do that? What the hell! ;-)
As for the topic, so many kids that are now getting older were raised in a way to make them think the whole world revolves around them, so it's no surprise they care less about wasting people's time or flaking for what they think is a better offer. I'd say, get used to it because it's likely going to get worse.
We just experienced this.. again. It's not NEW to us having some EXPerience in the lifestyle, especially when we've visited the beach in jersey and DElaware yet it's the primary reason we love clubs and hotel parties. This afternoon a delaware couple who chatted with us and perved us a bunch of times chatted with us again.. opened a few face pics, asked in a sexy way for us to reopen our private ones. We did, just for three days. Within a few minutes they blocked us. And trust me our private pictures are classy and sexy.
So they had just enough time to screen shot our pics before blocking us. There is a special place in hell for rude people like this- right next to bad drivers and people who put ketchup on their hot dogs.. just sayin'
And the issue of time wasters is even more of a bigger problem. How do we expose serial time wasters?
How do we expose serial ghosters and stand up con artist scum with track records? especially if they stand you up for hours and ghost you with no explanation or apologies even days or weeks,months later. It has happened to me several times in just the past 4 months.
Mayhem, thought about blocking, but figured a note works well enough. If they get obnoxious, we’ll block. We agree that if we met a sm we liked we could have subsequent meets outside of the club. The club we were at had plenty of good quality guys that we really didn’t have any problem completing our plans.
JCcpl2 - Totally agree with your SM plan. We only do mfm's at parties anyway because it gives us both more play options, but we also don't have to worry about no shows.
After a while, you'll have a number of your own reliable SM contacts if you decide you want to do an mfm with someone, but getting some strange does have it's appeal as well, and LS parties seem to be the best way to scratch that itch with less risk of a wasted night.
One nice thing about SLS is the ability to tag profiles with Notes, and I also make use of that feature. Some people just go ahead and block no shows, so that can work too.
Ironically got stood up this weekend, however we were able to salvage our night and ended up having a great time. The offending parties have had notations added, so that we never mistakenly make plans with them again. A while back we decided that we would only meet new singles at a ls club or event, and it felt like that plan was validated Saturday night.
We’ve met people that didn’t quite look like they were represented on their profiles but not often. We can only recall getting stood up once. If we got stood up we won’t make plans with that person again obviously unless they had reached out with some plausible reason why they were cancelling. Do a no show no call and we won’t waste more time.
If we make plans with someone, we keep them and won’t cancel just because a better sounding offer comes along. Our biggest irritation if we were to get stood up is knowing that we might have passed on other great people and opportunities.
Lisalooking. We have only had one guy do that to us. Texted he was stuck at the light around the corner then a no show. He also must have blocked us on SLS as he completely disappeared. There have been a few that when they showed up we wish they hadn't.
MoeKathy
Spot on in your assessment- I have been in this lifestyle both as a married male and now single. I am one the fortunate ones that have met a few great couple from this site, It was not without difficulty though and through many times of no shows or excuses from the ones who failed to follow through. I will admit at times I felt like giving up on this site, but it has it moments. I would not have met the couples I have without this site.
moekathy - Sounds about right ;-) Luckily we have had great luck in finding many in that first 25% group.
lissalookin - Sorry to here that. Not much consolation, but we'd have you guys over if we lived closer.
We just had 2 SMs this past weekend , the first was just to meet at local club said he was on his way , and then nothing the second one stayed in touch all the way there , sit at bar for 20 mins . Then got text I will be there. He never showed and not to be heard from again . This weekend was the worst we ever had as far as fake and flakes . Wasted a lot of time getting to know these idiots , and going out for nothing....
Kinky, you will discover that true lifestylers are only a small portion (25%) of the members of this site. So what makes up the remaining 75%, you ask?
1) Fakes. (15%): Mainly single guys or married guys whose wives are not on board. They will chat forever and suggest you trade photos on Kik so they can see your nude photos.
2) Cheaters (15%). Those are people not only cheating on their spouses, but also want to fuck others than the ones they are cheating with.
3) Chat room masturbators (15%). Those are the ones who are always in the chat rooms with no intention, capability of playing. Their profiles are optimized for chats with many galleries they gradually open during chat.
4) Exhibitionists (10%) who like to go to events to show off their 9 days a week in the gym bodies but won't play with anyone.
5) Occasional hookup people (15%). Those folks are not true lifestylers but lots of fun. They play only when they get horny (or drunk) and usually results in some pretty raw action if you like that.
6) And the last 5% are people who signed up for a specific reason like a fantasy, or a mini adventure. They are not usually around long after that.
Despite all, there are some great people on this site and you will have some memorable moments. So grab your sieve, sort through the piles of crap like we all do, and pull out the the few gems you are looking for.
Welcome to the forums Kinky. I'm not sure what you were expecting but it appears you've only been members here for a little over 2 weeks.
It's not unreasonable to expect that there'd be a number of others here looking for the same as you, but by the sound of it, you already figured out that it's not that easy. Covid of course didn't make things any easier. If not for that, I'd suggest looking for some local parties. Otherwise, give it some time.
That is all we have found here.
Just plain awful.
We only joined by the suggestion of s good friend and long time playmate.
He certified us.
He introduced us to many people who were on this site but that was from some years ago.
Our entire experience here has been utter crap.
@Mayhem - Oh I agree! It wouldn't last for 5 minutes. But it would be one of the greatest 5 minutes in SLS history lol
Should we call it "The Jerry Springer Thread"? I suspect this would be even worse than the Politics thread.
Problem is, if someone has an axe to grind for whatever reason, they could make stuff up and post it. Then it becomes their word against yours. I can see people avoiding contact with anyone that posts in that thread for any reason. Sounds good in theory, but I suspect in practice it would mostly suck and quickly result in TOPIC LOCKED.
@FUN - You know that's not a bad idea... Whether here or somewhere.. There should be a group/forum for bad experiences and the people who caused them.. And since the other person is likely to be here as well, they can explain themselves or move along. And I bet the shame would stop a lot of people from flaking, as to not wind up in there.
m&k - Your observations probably explain why it can be so hard to meet couples online. More than once I've wondered why some people are even on here.
It's all about money for SLS. They will admit a single guy because he pays. Lucky for us, we don't meet single men, so other than the occasional pesky one who refuses to take the hint, we don't get too much annoyance from them.
Speaking of money, don't forget the chat rooms in this equation. A significant percentage of the SLS users who are not the "meeting" types lurk there. They watch masturbation cams, and talk spend time just "chatting" about their fantasies, as evident by how their photos are arranged. Don't expect to meet them in person.
when I look at a product on Amazon, and see 4000 positive reviews and 50 negative ones, I will buy it. Perhaps SLS should consider a review system where 1) Participation is voluntary, 2) Only cumulative score is visible, and 3) Lots of negative scores prompt a notification from the administrators. There would be lots of details to iron out, and it will probably result in losing about half the subscribers who were all fakes anyway. Therefore, it is highly unlikely SLS would want to implement it.
It seems to have gotten a lot worse since we started on this site. Yes I'm going to blame single guys.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Single guys will be the demise of sls.
Oh YES MOE.. more the norm on SLS at last 50% of the time and that percentage is low for Fakes !
Still say we need a Yelp type review on SLS explaining why it was given based on facts. No shows, married cheating, wife had no clue, guy or couple were great on dance floor and in bed...etc etc .. Oh Yes they are here... but when you find some good ones.. they too are NICE!
