Slut House party

Transcript

Welcome to the Pineapple Pinup, the Hot Wife Life podcast. On today's podcast, I'm going to talk about a party that we went to, a special room that they had, some basically queries about how to move on to the next steps, and then some more defining different roles in the lifestyle. So Saturday night, we went out to do our slutty fun and it was a departure from our normal. Um, our normal is a hotel party and this was a departure from our normal. Our normal is a hotel party and this was a house party.

Now, that's not to say we haven't done house parties in the past, but the few times that we've done them, they have been very hit and miss. The house party in Vegas, off the chain. the house party in richmond good until it went bad and then the house party that we did in um in up north the first time was too weird we went back and tried it again and it was again not again, not our cup of tea, not our scene. So going to a house party is not exactly 100% guaranteed to be a good time.

Hotel parties usually are, but the house party has a lot more, there's a lot more that can go wrong in a house party. There's no clear set starting gun at a house party where there is at a hotel party. So because of the fact that we are creatures of habit, it's a little intense for us to try to do this, to do these house parties. But we decided to go and we went and I was really glad that we had gone because my friends were there. My friend B who moved out of the area, she and her friend Elle came and it had been a very long time since I had seen her. Now B is very, she's very chatty.

She is very social. She's bubbly. She's a lot of fun and she's very fun to talk to. And so we spent a good portion of the time talking to B and L and Jeff and their friend A. Um, it was exciting to catch up with her because it'd been a while since we'd seen her. And because of the fact that there was no clear starting gun, I just spent a lot of time sitting on the couch talking to her. And at some point, um, Jeff actually got up And we'll see you next time. there was no clear starting gun. I just spent a lot of time sitting on the couch talking to her.

And at some point, Jeff actually got up and went with Elle to go play. And he got invited to go into the hot tub. And this house had a hot tub inside, which I'm a woman of a certain age. And when heat and humidity get me, I'm like, I'm done. So I knew better than to go play downstairs because the heat and the humidity were just rising all through the night. But he went down and played in the hot tub. And then he came back and it was time for us to go play.

So I got up and I went with him to go play and i tend to have when some action starts that's new and interesting a lot of times you'll get it'll be a pied piper kind of moment where one minute i wasn't playing with anyone and then all of a sudden i was playing with three guys and I will get into why but um so I was playing with these three guys I was playing with Jeff Moses and I call him Moses because that man had a staff I it was long it was thin but it was a fucking staff like this appendage was like almost to his knee and um then i then there was also john and john came over and it was it was okay so let me start at the beginning jeff and i are looking for a place to play.

We find a place to play and I get all set up. I make sure I've got towels. I make sure that I am prepared for the mess that I am about to make. And Jeff begins to do the thing that Jeff does. He wakes me up. He puts my pussy on alert that this, it is time to get to work. It says rise and shine, little G spot. You, you are called to action.

So Jeff and I are playing and it is fucking amazing because again, he wakes up my G spot and he makes everything sing and dance to the same fucking tune and then he started fucking me and now Jeff has played with me so much that he is quite well aware of what my body is doing at certain moments and so when he felt the telltale squeezing he started to pull out and as he started to pull out um the flood water started and he pulled out at just this moment now Moses was to my left side I was sucking his dick and stroking him while he was playing with my right breast.

So he was kind of across my body. But when Jeff pulled out the floodwaters, they came and sprayed all down, all over up Jeff's chest, all over my hand, all up Moses's side, all over my face, all over my my chest and i was just thinking i am so sorry this is somebody's house somebody actually freaking lives here and i have just jackson pollocked the wall so um they were very impressed with my waterworks and moses was like god damn you know?

And, was really fun it was really a lot of fun and then moses took his turn now because of the fact that moses was very very long i am not entirely sure how much of his dick he was getting into me my husband might be able to answer that question and i'll be sure to ask him but um I'm not sure how much he was able to get into me because that man was blessed for days and it ended up being really um really interesting because he kept kind of like pulling out and then he'd kind of lose lose the grip and then slide away and I was like I don't even understand how you're getting it all out but it was um he was a lot of fun to play with so he played for a while and then John stepped up and John was girthy and long.

He, not as long as Moses. Um, I don't think anybody was as long as Moses, but, um, it was very interesting to play with him because he literally kept, kept the rivers coming. And I was coming and coming and coming. And, um, then everything kind of quieted down and my husband and I, and I scrambled because part of the rules for this particular party and her rules were very long and very detailed. So there was no question as We'll be right back.

and i scrambled because part of the rules for this particular party and her rules were very long and very detailed so there was no question as to whether or not you knew right from wrong at this party um and i will get into that a little bit more in the next segment but um she had made sure that every single bed had a little bin next to it that you could, that had extra sheets. So if you soiled the sheets that you were on, it was up to you to change the sheets out for the next person.

So my husband and I, as soon as we were, as soon as I was done with the three gentlemen, scrambled really quick, got the sheets redone, the bed remade. And then we headed back to go sit down and chat. And this, this is, this is where my earlier in the shame comes into my hubris, if you will. Um, so on Thursday, because of the fact that I recently turned 50 years old, um, I had an appointment to go get vaccines and I had vaccines that I needed to get because I had turned 50 and there were three of them. And so I went and I wanted to be able to use at least one of my arms fully.

So I agreed to have her put all three of the shots in one arm. That was a bad idea. I had a little bit of a reaction. My arm swelled up and turned red. I got what's called vaccination arm. And we, and my husband was very worried about it. And there was a nurse that we knew this couple um we've known this couple we've played with this couple at many many parties um we've chatted we've hung out you know and he he is a nurse and he came over and he looked at my arm and he's like you should not be here you need to go and because of the fact that my husband is very protective of me.

He took that as sign to vacate so we ended up leaving very very early from the party but we had such a great time and i mean that because we spent a really good amount of time talking to our friends spending time with our friends enjoying enjoying conversation and getting to know each other on a deeper level friendships um swapping more stories telling stories about what we've been up to and all that good stuff so it was so much fun to do that part of it and then And there were other things about this party that I'm going to get into, but I'll chat with you in the next segment.

This party had what is called a dark room this room is for exploring anonymously in the dark the human form it is to be explored it is to explore others it is to take a lot of the stigma out of whatever it is and give you the opportunity to experiment beyond what your, what, you know, it gives you the opportunity to do things in an anonymous setting.

It's a lot like a glory hole um very anonymous very dark you don't know whose hand is where what hand is doing what and this dark room had very specific rules in order to go in by going in you were consenting you were consenting to whatever was going to take place within that room. Now, that doesn't mean that you can't remove consent by saying no. No, stop. Not for me. That's absolutely fine. But you needed to be polite about turning people down. So somewhere in the course of the party, I have a friend who I have spoken to at other parties. He is very I appreciate it.

So somewhere in the course of the party, I have a friend who I have spoken to at other parties. He is very smart, very cute, very funny. And we have chatted so much in the past. Like he's usually a go-to for me to sit down and talk to. And he came over because he saw me at the party and he was there with a date and they were, they had gone into the dark room. And when they went into the dark room, he was approached by a man. And because of the fact that he was approached by a man, he was like, no dude, no thank you.

And the guy basically said, you're in this, you you're in the dark room that means you're consenting to this and he said um no thank you you need to get you need to get out of my face and then the guy was like um why are you in the dark room if that's what this room is for and he's like um no you need to get out of my face. And so he ended up leaving the dark room. And then the gentleman also left the dark room and was sitting at a table nearby to where we were chatting. And he pointed the gentleman out to me and he said, that's that guy I just basically did this thing in this room.

Now, I do not have any skin in this game, which is kind of why I am trying to approach it from all angles. No means no. Consent is a gift. And if you abuse that gift, it is you're a bad you're in a bad way so just because you have consent at one point does not mean that that consent is still good if someone says no okay you don't get to go back, well, you said yes once. That's not how it works. Consent is ongoing and there's constant check-in with having that consent. So by going into the room, yes, he had consented to whatever the dark room held, but he also said no.

so but here's the thing about the darkroom. The darkroom is designed to give people who are bi-curious, bi-flexible, um, an opportunity to see how flexible, how bi they really are. it's an opportunity to go in and just be body to body with the masses.

Now, if you are definitely straight, definitely not by in any way, going into that room seems like fun, but it's going to open you up to things that you may not be comfortable with which is why it is very very clear in the novel that was written about this particular room that this room is there for that purpose to be anonymous exploration exploration anything can happen in that room and if that is is not for you, stay out of that room. It's very, very clear. And obviously be polite about turning people down. Now, this is, I am not, I never, I wouldn't have gone into the dark room.

That is not my cup of tea. Not because of anything that could have gone down in there, but because of the fact that I like my consent to be so verbal. I like my consent to be so yes, so no, so, so given and so received that there can be no question. There can be no ambiguity. And in a dark room with an implied consent, I don't really, I'm not super comfortable in that scenario. Despite the fact that I think that it would be a lot of fun to go in there and just, you know, be human masses cavorting all over one another. That would be fun.

But the consent part really throws me, which is why I never, I never dipped my toe in that particular pool. Um, there are two sides to this story. One side is a story of he should not have been in that room. And the other side of that story is that other gentleman should not have refused to listen. When somebody says no, that's it. That's the end of the story. Okay. That's the end of the, you don't get to push and keep pushing and think that you have clear and true consent. If somebody says no, you say, all right, then if you just, if you change your mind, come find me.

That's how, that's how no works. No is red light. No is stop. No is we're not having this conversation any farther. And in order for this conversation to restart, it has to be restarted by the person who said no. That's just it. That's just the facts. So I do not fault the gentleman who was pushing the issue to for the beginning for trying to maneuver in on this gentleman that was fine that was exactly what that room was designed to do but as soon as he he said, no, that's not for me, I'm not interested, please don't, that man needed to stop.

And just because of the fact that you are in a room where you feel like you have license to do something does not mean that you have actual license to do anything that you want. There's still some level of consent that you need to, like you, you can't just keep pushing because you feel like somebody didn't listen to the rules. and that's my takeaway on it. That was what I thought. And that's why I was intrigued by the room at first, and then saw its flaws almost immediately when we started talking about it. Because, you know, it is trying to herd cats.

It is trying to, it's implying consent that may not be freely given. So just a little takeaway. I'm not 100 sure what happens when you put a podcast out um i am not sure how it goes for anybody else okay but i end up on a lot of lists um one that i just got word of is that i made the top 10 of feed spot lists, feedspot.com. I am not a hundred percent sure. Um, it was for hot wife lifestyle podcasts, which how many are there? Um, I appreciate it. Believe me. Um, and I'm grateful for everybody who listens, and honestly, that is fantastic, but I'm trying to figure out how does this work?

How does being on a top 10 list, I don't know, benefit you, other than bringing you more listeners? How does being on a list improve the quality, I guess, of what I'm doing? I'm not entirely sure. I would love to have somebody who's actually versed in the podcast universe give me some feedback on what it is that I'm supposed to be getting from these lists and what it is that I'm supposed to be doing with these lists. Because I get a lot of people, like Good Pods has sent me things that I'm on their top 100 list or whatever for personal journals.

And I'm trying to figure out what it is that I'm supposed to do with this, what it is that I am supposed to take from this, how it is that I am supposed to leverage their mentioning me to reach the next level because like anything that we do, we'd like it to improve with time. We'd like it to get better. We'd like it to evolve and become something that more people listen to, more people talk about, more people want to interact with. But what are the steps that I can take to get to that next level? Because here's the thing.

I don't think that anybody is going to brandish about the fact that they're listening to a Hot Wife lifestyle podcast. There might be select friends that they share it with, but it would not ever go to like their Facebook. And that's okay, because I get it. The lifestyle is not something that we are sharing with the masses. The lifestyle is something that we, with our buddies in the clubhouse, it's like we're part of a secret crew. And believe me, I get it. Not everybody can live their life in front of a microphone out loud.

Some people have to live their lives like on the down low because for whatever reason. And there's always going to be people that you want to hide your sex life from because frankly, it's a gross to share it with your blood relatives. It's not cool. Like it's not what you, it's not what you're looking for. So I am trying to figure my way through this.

And of course, anybody who has any advice, please don't hesitate to hit me up because I'm, I know that I'm uneducated in this area and I would love to become more educated and I would love to figure out what it is that I can do to take this podcast to another level, to a, to something maybe with interviews or something maybe a little bit bigger with a little bit more structured something. I don't know. But my thing is, I know that this podcast is something that I want to do for as long as I possibly can.

Because I find talking about sex and talking about kink and talking about the lifestyle is something that will strike a chord with someone and give them an opportunity to think about what it is they want in their life. That's all I'm trying to do really is, um, release some of the stigma around kink and sex and fetishes and give it room for conversation. give it room to be talked about so that we are not enveloping ourselves in shame. I know. I know firsthand what can happen when you wallow in the shame of it. It is not good for your system. It is not good for your health.

It is not good for your, your body is not designed to live in that shame. Your body is designed to, and your brain will help you remove, move shame into something else. So I think that when we open the doors and we cast a light, I think that it gives everybody else the opportunity to do a little bit more, you are not alone, a little bit more, this is not weird, a little bit more mainstream it, a little bit more talking about it openly gives it something special, something like a community. Let's talk about the branding of the lifestyle. Ethical non-monogamy. Okay, so let's break it down.

Ethically, if we're going to be non-monogamous and we don't want to commit adultery, we have to come to a consensus of how we are going to do it, the rules by which we are going to live. And every set of lifestyle couples has their own different set of rules, the varying ways that they play. Now, my husband and I seem to have a kind of fairly typical, um, relationship, uh, stag vixen. Um, he does not play. I do. Um, and before a lot of people come at me, he really did choose this lifestyle. We discussed it at his urging, okay? So... we discussed it at his urging. Okay.

So, but when we first discussed it, I did not realize what it was that he was asking for. I didn't realize that he was asking for a stag vixen or a cuck relationship. I didn't know that. I thought that like a lot of men that stereotype that they're constantly looking for strange was what he was trying to do. I thought he was looking for an excuse to go out there and play with other women. And I'll be honest with you, I was actually okay with it. That's why we started in the first place, because I thought that that was where he was going with it.

I didn't really think about my side of the street, okay? I didn't think about how he would react to my side of the street. I didn't think how he would react to my engagement in activities. Now, when we first started, we didn't have the basis of communication, as I may have mentioned a million or so times. And I know that I'm repeating myself quite a bit right now, but we didn't know where we were going with non-monogamy. Therefore, we weren't doing it ethically. We weren't doing it with the factors of consent that were probably the most necessary.

Because of the fact that there was miscommunication, and there was different interpretations, and there was all sorts of differentiation between our ultimate goals without any knowledge of where the other thought we were going, we did not approach it with full consent. And because we did not approach it with full consent, it became something scary. It became something that was not agreed to, something that was stressful. And so we stepped back. We stepped back, but it continued to be something that was a fantasy of my husband.

And the sheer volume of toys that we had throughout the years should have brought to mind what it was he was actually searching for. But I didn't know. And I didn't trust him. And I didn't believe him for a very, very long time. Because there are stereotypes out there of what men are, of what men are supposed to want, what men are supposed to do, what men are supposed to be, just as there are stereotypes about women. But stereotypes are not the rule. They are just an overall general assumption. Okay.

So when we take the lens of what we're talking about and put it through stereotyping, okay, put it through this, through what we assume, we're going to find that humans are much more nuanced than a fucking stereotype. Humans have many more layers than a fucking stereotype. We are not cardboard cutouts. So it took me a hot minute to really hear what my husband was looking for, focus in on how his reaction to our previous attempt at playing, how he reacted to it and how that made me feel.

and it took me more time to process the no and it took me more time to process the non-stereotypical thing that he was asking of me. We contain multitudes. And so that was one of the things that I found I had to work through. I had to work through what I naturally assumed to be truth. And I understand that stereotypes are there for a reason because, you know, they do have some universal truths. But they are not an explanation of everyone. And so, um, my husband and I had to learn to communicate and learn to actually say what was on our mind, say the things.

And I cannot, and I, one of the things that I have learned throughout the years, one of some of the biggest fights my husband and I ever get in, are because he thinks differently than I do. I think differently than he does. My body works differently than his does. we are different. And because we are different, because we are approaching things in a different way from each other, the expectation that we can understand where they're coming from doesn't always apply. Because even in the most mundane circumstances, you don't know what someone else is thinking.

You might have an inkling of what they're thinking, but you don't know what they're thinking because I've been with my husband over 20 years and well, actually over 25 years, but it doesn't matter. My husband and I have been together for a very long time. It is astounding to me the way that his brain works. When we have a simple conversation about something as mundane as a funny thing I said, his reaction to it is always such a surprise.

And I I don't know why it is because it's not like I haven't had the conversation a hundred million times before but it still shocks me it still shocks me that this thing that I just wanted to say out loud to him to make him giggle never really has reaction. It has a completely different reaction that then has to be worked through. This is not unusual. Miscommunication is the root of a lot of things. It's a root of a lot of divides. And the ability to communicate with someone and not assume that they have the same base of knowledge that you do is really, really difficult.

Because when you're forming your thoughts, you're forming them from the life experience that you have led. And while that is fantastic and wonderful and exactly what you should be doing, you're talking to someone who has not led the same life. So all this to say that I understand that when I'm standing with this microphone in my face, See you next time. all this to say that I understand that when I'm standing with this microphone in my face and I'm getting zero, um, corrections real time, that there are pieces of the world that I don't know anything about.

And I'm not trying to, not trying to pretend like I do. I am not trying to promote something that is illegal for you. I am trying simply to have a conversation about the experience that I'm having so that you have some basis of understanding so that when somebody does talk to you about ethical non-monogamy, the lifestyle, the swingers, that there's not an automatic assumption on your part and you have some basis of knowledge. I was having a discussion with a person at the party that we went to about various roles in kink. And she called herself an alpha bottom.

And I was eager to chime in and explain that I personally identify as a brat. Now, identifying as a brat is ego, a lot of it, and it's distrust for me. The reason that I am bratty is because I am, I don't trust the person that I'm with to be, I don't know, in charge to understand everything that's going on and to understand the nuances I also brat because I can't help but be sarcastic and funny in almost every single situation. It is my go-to. It is my personality. It is who I am. And so my husband often calls it lie down comedian. I make jokes because laughter is the universal Xanax.

It calms everybody down. It puts everybody in a positive thought process. And it sort of lends itself to community. Because when we can all laugh together, it sort of takes away any of the strife and mistrust, I guess. So for me, being a brat is a couple of different things. Because I know, I that I can be obedient when I want to be. And I think that's the problem getting me to want to be because I need to know that whoever is in charge has my best interests at heart, has my fulfillment at heart. So I think that's kind of why I really haven't been playing in a kink scene.

I haven't been playing in a BDSM type environment because I don't know if I'm designed for it anymore. I've gotten to the point in my life where I'm a little bit older, a little bit wiser, a lot fewer fuck bucks in my fuck buck bank. I don't give a fuck. Like, I just I don't have a lot of people pleaser in me anymore. Which is kind of funny, because I spent most of my life as that being my default setting. My default setting is something that changes through time, becomes something different. And that's okay. It is okay for your default settings to adapt and change with you.

As long as you're keeping true to yourself, or in my case, maybe becoming more true to myself, becoming more about my boundaries, becoming more about, yeah, no, I want to get off. I want to, I want to experience pleasure. I want to experience pleasure in a way, I want to experience pleasure in a way that most people don't, in a way that, um, takes you far away from average. When I go and do, um, gang bangs or parties or something like that, or I have somebody run or I have a party run train on me, it is not for them. I spend all of my time in that situation getting my pleasure.

Now, do I provide pleasure in that pursuit? Abso-fucking-lutely. Because I don't know if you guys know this or not, but we are better as a tribe. We are better as a group and everything is enhanced when we're being cooperative with one another. So whether or not I am seeking my own pleasure, I am also, I know that the best way for me to get my pleasure is to provide pleasure. I know that the quickest track to splashing orgasms is a very hard cock.

The easiest way to get a cock hard, stick it in your mouth, rub your tongue right over that little spot, right under the head, while you're gripping the base and pushing it and just basically manhandling the base of it while you're flicking your tongue over that spot at the top that makes every man go. That's the easiest way to get to the point where I am trying to get to. And that doesn't mean that I'm not having fun at all the other stops. I am. I'm having fun giving a blowjob. I actually really enjoy giving a blowjob.

I think that giving a blowjob is an art form that shows that I am dedicated to the craft of fucking. I love everything about sex. I love everything about sex. I, I am interested in finding sexual pursuits and, and people and just being in that framework, the sexy sexual framework. And I love everything that leads up to fucking. I love flirting and I love chatting and I love talking about things that have happened.

And I love giggling with girlfriends about sex and about oh my god did you see his cock what a massive cock that man had and being able to relate to one another through experiences that we've had. I am a fan of community. I am a fan of everything. Everything. I'm a fan of the lifestyle. I'm a fan of erotica. So for me, this is a natural pursuit. This is enjoyment. This is logicing my way through and reliving the pleasure. It's awesome. And the fact that I get to do it, the fact that I have an audience out there that will listen is fucking amazing.

But we're a community and I'm getting something from this too. I'm getting something. And I think when we start looking at the group dynamic, the yin versus the yang. And we start seeing, because people talk about it all the time, how... Okay, cut that. I just honestly, so for me, when, to bring it back to my original topic, being a brat is something that, um, I don't know if it was always a part of me in some small way. I believe that it was. That's always been my default. But I think that I have grown into being even more bratty, being even more not quite sure that we're on the same page.

I don't know if that makes any sense. Cut that too. So to bring it back, I believe that brat tendencies, my brat tendencies have gotten more defined, more refined. And I don't know if I will ever find the ability to be strictly obedient anymore. I used to be able to locate it, but now I don't know that I could. And that's an interesting thought experiment. Because we're never the same person as we experience things. We're never the same person as we become more educated. We're never the same person where our thoughts change are. So it's okay to adapt.

It's okay to think about the fact that that's what I used to be. Maybe that's not what I am anymore. And it's okay for your desires to change. Anyway, just an interesting thought and an interesting conversation that I have with this alpha bottom, um, alpha submissive, alpha, I don't remember the exact words that she used. She was, um, yeah, I think she was an alpha submissive. I, it's, it's a little fuzzy.

I'm a little fuzzy on the details details but that particular phrase kind of struck a chord with me it found it very interesting um because I feel like it's an adaptation of somebody who's not willing to go along with a bad plan and believe me, girl, I get it. I get it. Thank you for joining me today on the podcast. hope you got something out of it um if you have any questions or want to hit me up um for tell me your story you can reach out to me at pineapple pinup pod at gmail.com or on any of my socials which are listed in my show description.