Interview with an Andrea

Transcript

Welcome to the Pineapple Pin of the Hot Wife Life podcast. On today's podcast, it is a very special episode for me because I am joined by my friend Andrea, who, and we discuss all sorts of things. And then I got a question from a listener, Carmen. This is sort of a girl-centric episode, and I apologize for that. But please enjoy. Okay. Hi. Hello. Okay. What do you want to be called? Andrea. Okay. Andrea. This is my friend Andrea. She has been featured on the podcast in the past as a... I was trying to keep you, I was trying to keep you anonymous. Okay.

As anonymous as you can when everybody who was at the party knows everybody who was at the party. Yeah, it's Andrea. Yes. Okay. So how did you get into kink? Into kink or into the lifestyle? Let's start with kink because I have a feeling that kink came first. Did it? No. Okay.

I was introduced to the lifestyle by my aunt by your aunt yes oh my yes i yes like someone very close to me like my family and literally it was just to to make video to make uh money money okay to make uh parties okay yeah so that's how i started okay but then i found someone in the lifestyle in a party and i got stuck with him for seven years but then we broke up and now i'm here. I was single. Oh, wow. Okay, good. I was just looking around. We're not there yet. Okay. So, okay. So you were with somebody for seven years. Yes. In the lifestyle. Yes. Okay.

And then, um, you, wait, you weren't expecting that. No, no, that trust me no but trust me that's that's um what is in your mind your kink if it isn't lifestyle big things okay so yeah so you're like a queen of spades right yes okay that's how he used to call me. Okay. So that is your, is that your kink or is that? Okay. So, all right. So my original kink back before I got into the life was more BDSM. Okay. Okay. More sub play. Okay. I've never done that. Okay. Which is why that led me into the lifestyle. My gateway drug was actually my, the kinky side of things.

And then my husband and I came to the lifestyle from that kink situation, which is why it was a little shocking to me that your kink came second that's why i was checking that's why i was checking yeah like i always from my past relationships i don't know i always liked like a big dick there you go there you go queen of spades is um a very respectable very respectable um title yeah I don't know.

there you go there you go queen of spades is um a very respectable very respectable um title yeah so um because you are single you are more of a unicorn yes then like a hot wife or something like that how do you find being a unicorn in the let's say in our current area how do you like Like, do you find being a unicorn in the, let's say, in our current area? How do you, like, do you like being a unicorn here? Would you rather be a hot wife? Yes, because that's how I started being a hot wife, and I miss that. Okay. I miss that. That's the thing that I find. That's the thing.

I don't know how you do this, how you navigate this when you're single, because yes, I'm still new to it. Um, it's hard. It's scary sometimes. Okay. Um, but I think that once you find, um, someone that you trust, I can just go back to the same person. Gotcha. Yeah. And I know I'm gonna be safe right there. Yes. And see, that's one of the things that, um, I talk about a lot on here is the fact that I'm not entirely sure how it would look if I was trying to do this without my husband, without that safety net. Yes.

Because not only does he protect me physically he also protects me emotionally yeah and i'm not entirely sure how you download a party it's it's hard it's a lot of thinking sometimes on fed i try not to put that i'm gonna go to a party because whenever i do it i receive a lot of the ends yeah and then i'm i'm like okay should i not go yeah what if something happens to me yes well see that was one of the reasons why my husband and i started doing the parties is because they felt safer yeah then meeting people one-on-one yeah i think um i'm gonna stop doing that parties or like doing one-on-one yeah yeah because there's has been like some things going on that i'm just no yeah i can i can only imagine how terrifying it is yeah because i mean first of mean, first of all, we're women.

Yeah. We have vaginas, and we can't leave home without them. No. No. And it's harder to make your consent, like, known in a one-on-one environment. Not known, but, like, have it be respected. Yeah, and I think that being a one-on-one you're more vulnerable exactly than being in a crowd exactly and when you when you're in that crowd you've also got your tribe who's like somebody there is probably going to step up and protect you yeah i mean the very first time you ever came to a party that I was at. I know. That was the funniest thing. No, you should never apologize. We didn't meet.

But the funniest thing to me is that I'm on the bed getting railed out. You're standing by the door and like, it is like thirst. It is like coming off of them in fucking waves. It is the most desperate thing I've ever seen. you're like um dude give me a second and i didn't even know that happened until like days after yeah but it was so funny to me how you just looked at them and said um i'm just trying to get in with the vibe right now can i just got here can you breathe literally but that that to me was like, that was the funniest part.

But that's the problem with the parties that we go to is that a lot of times not a whole lot of people are playing. Yeah. And you know what I really like? I have recently discovered because, okay, because of the fact that I make such a god awful mess, I'm sorry, because of the fact that I make such a god awful mess, I try to camp out in one spot so that I'm not ruining the whole party for everyone. Okay. Okay.

But that usually entails me having to camp out on like the one side where it's just me yeah so i don't get a lot of that the other bed interaction oh that okay now it makes sense okay did you think i was standoffish no just like i did pay attention to that that you stay in one place yeah that you that you don't go like to other beds exactly okay because of the fact that i'm sorry like do you have any idea how guilty you feel everybody loves it oh yeah who does it imagine imagine you're a girl you have found a guy who wants to play with you and you go and you lay down and the bed is wet and cold.

Yes. Because somebody has turned the air conditioner down to 62 degrees because she's going through hot flashes and she's squirting all over everything. Right. Yes. So I I mean, in some capacity, capacity i am i'm trying to make it so that you have a comfortable place yeah knowing that i have just basically put caution tape around whatever area i am in because it's happened to you yeah yeah and i'm. It's okay. It was fucking hilarious, though. That was probably the funniest shit. Okay, just to recap, we were playing, I think it was with Kobe. Last party?

No, that party that I just totally, like, painted you. Was I playing with Kobe? I think so. Yeah yeah and he pulled out at just the right moment and i yes just i was like i remember the first time i see you squirt i'm like oh shit she can squirt like the problem is more she can't not squirt when she cannot it's a it's a yeah no it it's a pain in the i mean i love it don't get me wrong but it's a pain in the ass because do you have any idea like just every time somebody lays down on a bed near me i'm like i'm so sorry i'm Please ignore Lakewater. Come fuck me. Okay.

There is some guys that they don't like it. I have come into some, probably like two or three guys. Though they're like, ew. I'm like, oh, you just don't appreciate this. Like, not everybody can do it. Right. Yeah. It's a skill.

And mind you, it's a skill that overtook me once i learned how to do it i couldn't shut the fucking thing off and i can square i'll square only if the guy is fucking me good yeah if i'm not enjoying what i'm feeling you're not gonna get that right so guys work hard on that yeah no it's funny because um I've had a lot of people who talk to me About the show the big show And I'm like well if you If you want it you're going to have to do some prep work Dude of course you got to turn the fountain On if you want to see It's not just going to open the faucet and let it rain No it's not like that it don't work like that It doesn't work like that you got to prime the pump dude yes but so you are currently because you are a unicorn you get invited to a lot of parties yeah so what yeah wow yeah yeah um and i personally am so grateful when you come to my parties like legit it okay i've had parties before yeah where i have invited several women and none of them played oh wow so i was taking like all 17 of the men that showed up by myself a waste of a spot exactly yeah like i might as well turn the sprinkler systems on yes like i'm sorry guys yeah no if i go to a party i'm going with the mentality that i want to play i want to have fun because i don't do this every day exactly yeah i don't do this every day and i don't go to.

Like, when I was a couple, we used to go parties probably every weekend. Right. And sometimes we would go Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. By Sunday night, my pussy was swollen, my legs were shaking, but that was us. Yeah. And I miss that. I haven't found the right prince. I can play with some people. Like, I can play with some people. Okay. But there are some that I'm like, no, I can't have a conversation with you. Okay.

I'm a very selective person when it comes to play i mean if you notice like whenever you go to to your parties i don't play with everybody exactly not because i'm naked right there that means my pussy is available for everybody right no i might touch them for a little bit, but it's not what i'm looking for there's a size and a thickness that i'm looking for right and if you're not there nothing is gonna happen there you go yeah that's me going to parties because i don't want to waste my time i don't want to waste their time right uh one of your parties okay it happened that i did i said fuck it i'm just gonna be with everybody and i'm just gonna have fun this guy he couldn't get hard oh god i was a doggy style and he was trying to put his dick in, but he was just hurting me.

Yeah, because he was there with his fist. Yes. So he kept on pushing with his hand, and I said, you know what? I need some dick. I'm horny. I'm horny. I need some dick. Yes.

I did tell somebody that, I'm sorry, I don't have a half an hour to play with your dick taffy right now i gotta go yeah i wasn't that wasn't the flavor of the month when i showed up here yes but i mean the thing is is it's not to be cruel but it's not like we're there we're not the fucking party favors no we're the reason the party exists yeah because without us i mean and even just to go to a party that doesn't mean you're gonna play you can watch me i like to watch first i like to see a girl getting fucked and that's gonna turn me on right then i'm like, now I'm ready.

It's like watching live porn. Yes. Yes. Exactly. Yeah. I get you. Yeah. So after I watch. My problem is that I'm always like, okay, can we get this show on the road? Because I came here for a reason. It's getting late.

It's getting late, and I got to go home at some point because i'm gonna need a sandwich yes i mean it's exhausting yeah it's exhausting but more than one guy yes yes but the nice the i mean it's a lot of fucking fun it's oh yeah of course a lot of fucking fun yes yes um um but yes it's also but i mean the thing is is that burns a lot of calories and it takes a lot of energy and you've got your legs in these very weird positions weird positions for long periods of time that if you're not fucking you can't do that yeah no you can't stretch like that trust me i tried it out when's the last time you sat in happy baby for like no fucking 45 minutes no unless there's a guy between my thighs i ain't doing that oh yeah but when there's a guy between my thighs i can do it for like it doesn't hurt it doesn't hurt no and he's not uncomfortable at all but yeah no um downward dog that's a good one no i'm just i'm just kidding but yeah so the parties i understand exactly what you're talking about though because just because you come to a party doesn't mean that you're going to be able to perform right because it's an atmosphere yes and if you're at all inside your head it's gonna shrivel yeah and no amount of fluff or magic is gonna make it come to life if you're uncomfortable in the whole situation yeah okay so we got to get to the thing with the guy okay so now let me just say let me just say josh is actually a regular bowl of mine okay so he has actually he and i have actually played okay a lot okay but he at that party i was seriously like i don't know if i'll ever be able to fuck him again oh my god because that was some thirsty fucking shit Thank you.

but he at that party i was seriously like i don't know if i'll ever be able to fuck him again oh my god because that was some thirsty fucking shit yes that was some crazy thirsty shit and i'm so turned off like okay guys and what are you doing here with me if you want to be with her exactly but no it's not that's not my problem i don't have any problem please go go fuck her all you like but my problem is is that when you act thirsty when you act a little desperate pushy pushy and like um almost cracked out it's not really something that i'm going oh yeah do me big boy no no no so the thing is is that i'm not asking you to be aloof that's not at all what you know that's never what i'm asking the guy to be but when it's like you gotta get me with her oh no i'm like whispering it in my ear like it's a fucking sexy secret no dude i get it you like that guy no no he was just standing there he um i was i had taken a break i'd gotten up and i went to because i have to go check in with my husband And because for me, a lot of the party is about my husband okay and how he's my touchstone okay so I like knowing where he is and if he's having a good time because if he's because we're because of the fact that there's two of us both of us need to be having a good time of course or it's time to shut it down yeah so with my husband i was going to check on him and i'd gotten up and i'd put on my robe and he came in and you were standing there talking to somebody and then you went out of the room and he came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me like he was all like sexy hug from behind it was like you need to set up a play date with me and her.

Oh, my. And I was like, oh, okay. I got to go. Let me go with my husband. I got to go find the thing that I want to do now. But for me, it's like there's something about that that's always kind of turned me off i think to every girl that's a turn off exactly and saying things like your vagina is not enough can you bring an extra no i'm just kidding that's that's i'm oh i'm interpreting what they're saying okay i'm interpreting because like have you ever had a guy say to you you should get another girl bring her with you no so far no but it like Thank you.

i'm interpreting because like have you ever had a guy say to you you should get another girl bring her with you no so far no but it like when it happens you're like i'll block that person yeah seriously it's like yes i'll block that person and it's not that i have a problem with it's it's the approach because honestly somebody said turn off exactly that would be immediately turn off for me I'll be like okay thank you so much have a good night let's say something like this have you ever thought about having a threesome with another woman because if you were into that I'd be very interested in participating in something like that with you much better approach yes that is yes but instead of you should get another car and so but i like i have questions what's wrong with my vagina yeah and what makes you think that you can satisfy what i mean what makes you think you can satisfy two of them?

Yeah. I mean. Some, some, I'm going to say some, they think that they can be. The sultan in the harem. Yes. But then when things are live and you're, you're there with the two girls, they can't perform. Right.

Because they don't know what to do it is a fucking mind they don't know how to act exactly they don't know i i mean it takes a very it takes um it takes a lot for a man to be able to perform in a in front of a group yes and when you put into that now you have to satisfy more than one woman yeah who you may not know very well that's that's even like on top of everything that makes me like a little nervous yeah i'm like what because usually like the first time is it's gonna be awkward at the beginning.

Like, are we doing um should i go doggie are you fucking me you're fucking herring where are we going yeah what position am i in when when you concocted this in your mind what position was i in was i over there in the corner okay i'm gonna be over there in the corner don't mind me i need a robe it's so chilly in the corner yes it's kind of like shower sex okay i'm chilly over here can i get my robe yes oh but i have been in in threesomes and it's it's been fun oh absolutely and when you approach it with the right attitude yes and you approach it with the right um game plan right and you don't make it a thirsty thing because i'm sorry i think it's the desperation the the fact that now all of a sudden give me a break you've turned me into a pimp yeah sorry i don't have a stable guys yeah but um that to me is very um it's one of those things though that just happens a lot and it happens a lot to women It happens a lot to women especially women in kink where the interpretation is that we do enjoy group sex because i do i enjoy group sex as a matter of fact the best part of the evening at the last party i threw was the end part where we were all in like that orgy pie yeah and it was oh yeah me too yeah i love it when the party's starting to wind down and it's enough people that everybody can get on the bed and i don't really care about the mess at that point yeah fucking we're here live in it yeah get in there yeah if you're not going home with my come on you you didn't do it right right yeah yeah the last part of the party yes that was great exactly and we had um we had the right chemistry going on yeah where it was because flame had spent all night being very very iron filings to a magnet with my pussy to the point where i was literally like dude i'm gonna get up now let me have another dig like because i don't if i wanted one dick i would stay home with my husband right and even he brings dildos to the party yeah you know i wanted to play with that toy that day but i totally forgot like the end it was great and then i mean you know everything that happened yes that night um i just forgot and then i remember the next day i'm like the toy i didn't get to play with the toy you remember the barbecue yes the barbecue we had both of the machines set up in this in the room right above above where we're sitting right now yes we had both of the machines set up no it's absolutely fine like it's not a problem but like just know that there is always an opportunity for you to come and play with any of my machines like because seriously we're gonna get it figured out we're gonna we're gonna get the timing right at some point yeah yeah so yeah but no it was um and it was okay that you didn't show up to that barbecue because um josh had to leave early okay and me and jeff like had a lot of fun okay it was really good time i don't know if you listen it was more like a one-on-one no i didn't end up oh so there was an i did an episode about it and there was this very funny thing that happened um he was doing a rim job on me uh-huh and all i could think is don't say fire in the hall and because i was afraid i wasn't gonna say it because i have a problem when something funny pops into my head not letting it come out my mouth like it was going through my head like a train like and i was like don't say it but trying to concentrate what was going down there as well so everything got very very tense okay and then i was worried that there would be fire in the hole i was right okay nobody's going to relax but it was it was a lot of fun though we had but it was really funny because I didn't even play with the machines okay no well you had two guys I had two guys so why would I hello I've brought you to my gallery so that you can watch me do something thank you know something about me?

Mm-hmm. I don't really like to play with toys. Okay. I'm curious about them, but I love Dick. Yes. Yes. I love Dick too, but I do love a good toy because you know what's crazy about a toy?

If I say I coming to a toy it doesn't change anything it doesn't change the depth that's going it doesn't change the vibration it's doing it doesn't change but if you say i'm coming to a guy all of a sudden they start speeding up and you're like where the fuck did you go wait wait come back i mean we were right there yeah promised like we were knocking on heaven's door and you decided to take a detour to see nebraska yeah what the fuck yeah in fact me saying i don't like toys look what i said yeah she just got it she just got a vibe out of her fucking purse because why not i mean you know i mean you never know when you're gonna use it exactly gonna need it exactly so that one looks like one of those um me vibes i don't know it's it's new okay new i just got it out of the package.

I charged it, and I'm like, oh, you're going with me today. Okay, so it's got the little tonguey parts. Yes. And then it's got the big egg part. That's cool. Oh, wow. That's how it sounds. That was a vibe, bye.

I think it has like 12 speeds oh damn nice that's my favorite because i have another toy from this uh brand uh-huh they're all the same like the vibrations is the same but the second one is my favorite perfect oh yeah okay that's a little too fast little too fast for you what's really funny is my um my head doesn't bump of course oh my god can't stop okay you press it really long just press it long see okay there you go i got it you can tell that i really play with toys and you can tell that i do yes yes okay so it was kind of funny so i had a it was so funny i had a um i went to a party like last week okay and there was a guy there and he had a stroke that reminded me of a vibrator because he would go Hump funny because i nicknamed him the camel because it was two humps and a stroke it was so funny it was so awesome but no it was um it was and that's another thing is that because of the fact that i am doing this podcast sometimes when i'm at the parties i'm trying to remember all the things that are going on yeah but i'm not really privy to a lot of the things that are going on because of the fact that i'm in a bed yes yeah doing the thing that i came to the party for so for me it's a little um there's a little background thing that i'm doing that i'm like hmm maybe i should just fucking focus on the thing on one thing not two so um it turns out So let's get started.

hmm maybe i should just fucking focus on the thing on one thing not two so um it turns out that you are actually friends with the guy that was there and you spend a lot of time with him right right yeah i have a feeling i have a feeling that this might be he might be my bad guy is packing some heat yes the skyscraper i enjoy a lot being with him yeah he's a nice guy too oh yes very nice guy anyway so if you did get into another relationship would you go vanilla? If you ever got into a relationship with a vanilla person? No. I've tried in the past with my ex, and I couldn't. Okay.

The most that I lasted without going to a party or without doing anything out of outside with my my ex it was one month oh yes that was like too much for me yeah that was too much for me and I said I can't no more I need to go to a party and I mean I understand that though i kind of i get it because it was a it wasn't like it was um it became a part of your relationship yes and that's where we met exactly so if and i have a hard time with with the thought of giving it and then taking it away and i mean you showed me to me it was like you showed me this life he didn't introduce me to it but i started going to parties and actually playing in the parties with him so to me it's like I explore the lifestyle with him.

So for me, for him to say, OK, we're going to stop. That was like, no, no. And it wasn't him who said we're going to stop. It was me that said, you know what? We're going to stop going to parties. Maybe that's going to benefit us from. We having problems right for the life because of the lifestyle so i said if i have to stop going to parties for the best of our relationship okay i'm gonna do it but didn't last no it didn't last Yeah. I mean, my husband and I actually started doing parties, um, a long time before we actually got into the lifestyle. We went to like maybe three or four. Okay.

And the reaction to it was, he seemed really tense.

okay and i i was fine i was like okay i'm enjoying it bring on the dicks you know um no yes but i didn't actually even play at those parties when we first started but because of the fact that my husband was having such an adverse reaction he was very tense and like a guy was touching my boobs and he goes it's just touching it's just touching and i'm like one of us is freaking out here and so i was like you know what i don't think this is something that we can do and it took me a long time to figure out that he enjoyed the angst but he didn't know how to handle it back then okay and so through so much talking oh yeah we got back to the point where we could where we got into the lifestyle again okay and it ended up working out so much better that time because there was a lot of there was a lot more talking the second time we tried it yeah because the first time I literally thought he was looking for a threesome with me and another girl and didn't just didn't want to come out and say, bring me another vagina.

But it turns out that's not what he was looking for at all. Okay. He was actually looking for me to get fucked. Okay.

And when I realized he was looking for that that it took me a long time to trust him yeah that he was not going to dumb yeah like overreact to it like that happened to me yeah yes that happened to me and the thing is is that um you can't you can say as much as you want if I do this you can't be mad at me and you can't you can't get like angry with me yeah you can say that as much as you wish and you can say that as much as you want but it doesn't affect it doesn't change how the actually happens yeah because when the actually hits the fan and he is jealous and he can't handle those emotions what else is he he gonna do yeah so you have to get to the point where you're like listen i am not doing this because it's something i sought out i am doing this because this is something you asked me to seek out yeah so i need you to bear that in mind with whatever emotional reaction you're gonna have to it suck it in and if i go out there i'm the one going out there and putting us at risk yeah because you asked me to yeah and i need that to be forefront in your mind before you lose your shit okay yes yeah but it was really funny because um he never overreacted at a party no he's never overreacted at a party okay he um we had no he's never like he has never overreacted since we started doing this since we got to the point where we were communicating about it and we were having all the conversations and i started to trust him that he knew his own emotions enough that i felt comfortable going out and doing this right with his blessing yes so but i mean the perfect way to say it yes yeah so here's but it was really funny because he and i went to a party together and there was a good gentleman there who was talking about the fact that he'd taken a girl and she did too much okay and he was complaining about the fact that she had done too much and my husband was like he literally took this man aside and said you can't do that dude you're slut shaming her yeah right and he was like and so they he ended up having having whole conversation with him where like if you take them to these parties you want them to be as free as fucking possible with their body yeah and you can't put limits on that especially if you don't define the limits before you go yeah because that's just setting everybody up for failure yeah right.

But no, I get it because there's a lot of pitfalls out there. There's a lot of pitfalls where, I mean, we're women. Emotional attachments are possible for others, I'm sure. Yeah. Have you ever gotten emotionally attached to somebody you were fucking? Yes.

Outside your marriage or outside your relationship yeah and that's kind of what broke the camel's back no i mean my my ex he didn't find out but i did i had to stop seeing him because he was it was getting too much it was becoming an emotional yeah it was yeah not not from the guy but from me right because when i play i like to kiss and feel romantic yeah I'll see you next time.

see emotion yeah no not from the guy but from me right because when i play i like to kiss and feel romantic yeah and yes yes so that was getting kind of out of hand with me and the guy and i just told my ex you know what no just let's just not see him for now yeah yeah and that that's that yeah see i'm built much different than that yeah i am really grossed out by emotions I don't know.

I don okay so for me kissing is something that i don't want to do because it feels so inauthentic i don't kiss everybody when i play yeah no only if i feel it and that has to do a lot the way they play right because there's guys that they just go and they're like rough no i mean i i like that yeah yes i'm not gonna say no i don't like that yeah i do like that i like it soft you can go rough and you can go soft on me but there's guys that I just don't like that. Yeah, I do like that. I like it soft. You can go rough and you can go soft on me.

But there's guys that I just don't feel like kissing them. And some guys are like, do you kiss? No, I don't. And then I'm playing with another person and I'm kissing that person. And I've seen them. They're like, really? I'm not your partner. I can kiss whoever I want. i want yeah i don't have there's nothing here that i'm responsible for your emotions on right yeah no i get that 100 because um for me there's a couple of guys i will kiss because i've known them like i, I know them very well. Like, my friend Jeff. Okay. He's, I mean, adorable. Okay. That guy's so adorable.

But, like, but there's others that, like, just the guy who said I love you while he was coming. Two times. What?

And I know that it was just a reaction to coming it had nothing to do with me but it was one of those things where i was like i am out of my emotional depths here guys this is supposed to like i'm an atm machine slide your slide your credit card let's get this done like i am literally like there's a slot yeah let's slide the part in and get it done yeah but like when emotions are involved i'm literally like oh oh no that's not that doesn't come with it that's it like i'm not that's not the kind of fucking that i do yeah and it's not because of the fact that I'm I think that emotions are bad but my I'm not a very I'm not a very emotional person to begin with okay and the fact that my husband has somehow drilled through all that to find the squishy center yes is just it's like that's his you know so for me it's like it's something that i'm not but that's awkwardly for someone to say i love you while they're coming it was so funny because you know the guy the iron filings yeah he was there when it happened and he's like i'm literally holt stroking his dick and this guy's saying i love you and and he looked at me and he goes did he just say this and then he said it again and he goes oh my god he just said that that's so awkward and i'm literally like he's right there can we not make him feel bad about this i'm stroking his dick giving him a lecture trying to figure out what this guy's emotionally going through.

I mean, you're great at handling things. Yeah. The more chaotic, the more chaotic, the funnier it is for me. Yeah. That one is, that's one of my gifts, actually. It's like the chaos is like my home base. And now we're here. Yeah. I feel right at home yes okay so because of the fact that you are a unicorn and you you have recently moved here yeah how do you how do you like it i mean is it exciting or is it just straight terrifying? No, it is exciting. Okay. It is exciting. I can get to play with whoever I want without saying, can I go play with him? I don't miss that. Right.

I do not miss saying, can I go play with him? Can I touch him? And I just choose who I want to play with. Well, see, I think that has a lot to do with your choice in partners too, because, um, I'll be frank. I don't ask my husband permission. With my relationship where I was, that was one of our thing that we would do everything together. That was one of your rules? Yes, that was one of our rules. That was, I would say, the rule number one. Yeah.

Well, our rule number one is that my husband has, like, there's very rare occasions when this isn't it, but our very first rule when we started was that he would be present. Yeah, but he lets you be. But he lets me do whatever i want as long as he's present and there to protect me yeah because his big thing is that this is dangerous yes this is dangerous for women this can get out of hand quickly oh yeah if there's not some safeguards in place. So because of the fact that my husband is 100% devoted to me, he wants to make sure that I'm as safe as possible. Yeah. Which is amazing and awesome.

But in the moment, whatever feels right to me is whatever I'm allowed. Like, there are no restrictions to what I'm allowed to do.

that with me yeah there was a lot of restrictions i couldn't kiss and to mean like i said i like to kiss while i'm getting fucked it depends on the person right i have to not a hard and fast rule yes no yeah and but with with us in our relationship Yeah, we have a lot of rules but it was more for him i don't know if he has to do the fact that he is older than me right he was well he is 22 years older than me yes wow yeah i do like older men i don't like young right guys no because they can't some of them they cannot last right yeah so you have very specific requirements of what you're looking for in a partner which girl standards i love that yes i love that for you i know like i said i know know what I like and I'm not going to waste my time.

Right. I always say that in my sound, I don't know if I, if it sounds rude saying that I'm not going to waste my time, but like I said, I'm not doing, I don't do this every day. Okay. This is something if you've ever listened to my podcast, my big thing is that consent starts from within.

And if you have boundaries and you know what your boundaries are, that means you've checked in and know what your consent level is right so and then you drop the pebble and all the consent ripples out from there but you have to have it from within first so the fact that you have boundaries so the fact that you have what you're looking for and what you're that's perfect that's the way you should be doing this whole lifestyle thing yeah because you don't owe these men anything right and just because they showed up at a party that you said you were attending that doesn't mean i'm gonna play with them exactly and it doesn't mean that you owe them and you don't owe them anything right i mean obviously everyone would prefer it if we weren't rude but at the same time if they're not getting the hint sometimes you have to be yes yes i always try to be as nice as possible dude give me a second.

I just got here. Yeah. Yes. Like, or sometimes what happens the most when I'm already playing with someone, they come and they start putting their dick right in your face. Uh-huh. Oh, yes. And I just push them away a little bit. I can't see the forest for the dicks. Yes, I get it. I start doing that. Yeah. And then they continue doing it. Mm-hmm. I'm like, if I push you away, that means I'm not interested. It's, I think it's obvious. Yeah. But then once they're like here and bright in my face, I'm like, can you back up? I go straight up. Yeah. And then they're like, oh, okay.

Did you think it was a you weren't close enough problem that I was pushing you away?

If I'm interested in you, obviously I'm going to touch you and I'm going to put that dick in my in my yeah pull you in we're we're designed to pull you in yes we're venus fly traps like that right so if i'm pushing you away guess what your fly didn't make it yes yeah no i mean i understand i understand entirely and the fact that you are willing to say oh yeah I will this is not yes that is all to me like that's really good to have that basis of knowledge for who you are so I like it yes so do you have anything that you would like to ask me?

Because I'm fairly forthright and I'll tell you anything you want to know. With girls. How far you go with girls? I have eaten and fingered. Okay. But that's about the extent. Okay. I mean mean that sounds like a lot when you say it but like yeah because not every girl goes like that yeah no i mean all the way yeah i mean i have um but like i i don't know that i've ever done it in a setting where it was just me and a girl. Okay. And that's because I am flexible in the bi area, but definitely I am hetero. Yeah. Like, I can be flexible to the bi. Yeah.

But it's more of a enhancement to the overall amping up.

then a lesbian tendency okay yeah i don't have like i don't have a problem with it but i'm also not like seeking it yeah if that makes sense yeah okay because i'm i mean what about you are you bi no i don't consider myself bi but i do enjoy like playing with another girl like touching here and there i have gone down on a girl once um and yeah it was it was fun right yeah because the interesting thing is is that um now mind you because of the fact that it's something that we've done, it's so much easier for me to understand the terrain down there. So like, for me, it's so much easier. Okay.

Then, and to be frank, I'd rather be eaten by a girl than by a guy. It's different. Yes. Yes.

Because, um, they're actually doing all of the things that you need we know where like the spot is exactly you don't have to be like oh yeah it's right there you missed it yes turn around right you turn yes and my thing is is that i'm not really one to get um I don't really get off with just somebody licking my clit i need fingers i need penetration i need more yeah like you can start with the fingers but then you yeah yes i'm the same way and i mean i don't like when guys are like down there and they're like and you're like okay okay all you're really doing is just making a mess yeah.

like down there and they're like and you're like okay okay all you're really doing is just making a mess yeah with your saliva nothing to do with me dude right so for me it's um i get bored yeah i get bored really easily and then i'm up there and i'm thinking about my grocery shopping list and then maybe it's just a me thing okay no it's literally something it's literally something that it's got to occupy because we want something in yes inside because like literally but my my g-spot is like yeah begging begging yeah no um the the thing is is that if i wanted a clitoral orgasm, I have a Hitachi wand.

Okay. Yes. I have a Hitachi wand and I will use that and I will get myself a clitoral orgasm. But when I am with somebody else, I want a penetrative one. Yeah. I want one where you penetrate and you do some outside finagling. Okay. So I'm, I'm right there with you. Like I'm bored. Yes. Like let's move on. Yeah. Let's move on because, okay, great. You've made the terrain very wet. Oh, cool. All right. Well, we're going to stop. Thank you so much for joining me yet though. I really appreciated this. We have to continue. Seriously. Yes. I got a question from a listener.

She asked me, what do you do about your period? Um, I, I am not going to give anybody medical advice, but in my particular situation, uh, in 2017, I went to my gynecologist and I basically told him that I was tired. I was tired of my period. I had lived an entire life where I don't know. I was tired. I was tired of my period. I had lived an entire life where there was always the threat that some crime scene unit was going to show up and try to figure out where the arterial spray came from. I had what was known as a super uterus. And no matter what I did, I could never stop or slow my periods.

I mean, I had ablations. I had, um, I had all sorts of permanent like things done and none of it worked. So in 2017, I went to my gynecologist and I explained to him that it was rough to live in this life. It was cramping. It was 10 days of, you know, hell. And he said, well, let's take it out. At some point in time, it's a lifestyle thing. It's a quality thing. Now he left me my ovaries so I didn't go instantly into menopause. So that was good, but he took everything else. And so, um, I don't have pap smears anymore.

I don't have like, I still do my well woman checkups and stuff like that, but I don't like, there's a lot of things that I no longer have, which is a complete blessing to me. Now, that being said, I am not recommending this for everyone because obviously, you know, those parts are there for a reason, but I will say it changed the game for me. It changed how I orgasmed, how long I could orgasm, how intensely I could orgasm. I don't know. the game for me. It changed how I orgasmed, how long I could orgasm, how intensely I could orgasm, and all in different ways. So I can orgasm for longer.

They are not as soul-stirring as they once were um they do not create that massive quake, but I can go past the point where I used to be able to go when I can ride the lightning longer. So when you're, everything gets too sensitive to touch and you feel like, you know, just basically socking somebody in the jaw because you've come and you're like, I'm done now. Um, that doesn't happen as much for me. It happens with too much direct clitoral stimulation, but not really, um, as often as it used to. It used to be that I was basically having like two orgasms.

They were, they were Closed Captioning by Kris Brandhagen. brandh releasing it. And at some point the muscle fatigue was just too much. And I was like, I can't really do anymore. So now I don't have that. It's changed the game on my orgasms. It's rethought how my orgasms go. And because of the fact that I don't have that, I now have this long, sustained pleasure plateau that just keeps going if you keep going. And it's kind of amazing. It's like, it's completely different. And it, at first it feels so weird. You're like, am I even having an orgasm? What's going on?

But you get to the point where you've like figured it all out. Now that leads me to the next part of Claudia's question. Like she's having terrible mood swings because of perimenopause. my husband can attest to this my mood swings off the charts. My ability to go from giddy happiness to straight fucked up anger were instantaneous. My ability to have a conversation was limited to him not irritating me. Because if I got irritated, I went off like a fucking lunatic.

Now, that's not great when you're in this game, when you're in this lifestyle, and you're trying to have deep, meaningful conversations. And you're trying to do it with making yourself vulnerable and saying the things that you wouldn't normally say because you need to say them. Okay. So my husband and I, like recently I went and got hormone replacement therapy because I was having all of the symptoms, the night sweats, the muscle weakness, I had shoulder surgery two years ago now. And it was insanity because all of this was related to depleting estrogen levels. And nobody said anything to me.

Nobody said, Hey, some of this stuff could be caused by depleting. And they were like, take black cohosh and maybe some wild yam. And, you know, they were trying to give me alternatives because there's such a bad rap around hormone replacement therapy for so long. And I finally listened to a menopause expert. I finally listened to somebody who basically made sense of all of the symptoms I was having, my lunatic, crazy mood swings. Now, here's where this actually comes into play. Okay, so but anyway, sorry, let me go back.

I was listening to this menopause expert who was telling us all these things that we really need to hear. All the symptoms that are connected to menopause because estrogen is everywhere in our bodies. The brain fog is caused because there's not enough estrogen lubing it all up, making it soft and supple. There's not enough estrogen in our joints and there's not enough estrogen in the fibers in our ears. So when you start adding that estrogen back in and I am on the full gamut, I am on estrogen. I am on progesterone. I am on the testosterone.

And the reason for that is because your symptoms are so varied. Your symptoms are so widely varied. And progesterone tends to counteract cortisol, Cortisol, sorry. And cortisol is the reason that you have a lot of anxiety and you have a lot of sleeplessness. So being on the progesterone is something I do at night so that I can, it drops my cortisol levels and makes it so that I can sleep better at night. Now, mind you, I have not been on this treatment for very long, but I am finally starting to see some results. I am not nearly as anxious. I have a little bit more zest for life.

The testosterone gives you back that zest, gives you back that desire, gives you back that want. And freaking love it. Because instead of facing, my husband and I, I'm always excited to go to parties. But I was facing a lot of anxiety about the party as it led up. I was not enjoying the buildup. I was anxious and nervous. And a lot of times the fact that I was anxious and nervous for absolutely no reason, because mentally I could talk myself out of being anxious or nervous.

Um, because of that, there was this just underlying feeling of, I don't know what's going on and I don't know how to combat this. And so I would oftentimes go to the party, do a little bit and then leave because I was feeling, I was taking bad feeling in with me. And that's not to say that I didn't want to go or that my husband forced me to go. None of that happened.

It was all 100% me, but because of the fact that I was having these emotions that I didn't understand, that I couldn't figure out, that I didn't have control over, I was having a very, very hard time wrapping my brain around the emotions tied to everything. And as I may have mentioned, I am very emotionally stunted to begin with. I don't get attached very often. I am very transactional when it comes to sex. I am, I prefer to be a little bit of a stranger, um, because I don't, there's not a lot of like emotional connection that I really want, but obviously I'm learning to get over all of that.

But at the same time, because of the fact that I'm not super great with emotions to begin with, the fact that I could not control the emotions I was having was so rough for me. And it made it very difficult for my husband, who's trying desperately not to piss me off and trying desperately to keep and make sure that he's not forcing me into something that I don't want to do because he is concerned. I am his number one concern. So when I'm going through this and I can't really understand it, and I'm trying to just power my way through, it was so difficult. It was so rough.

But when I finally heard this expert, and I'll tell you exactly where I heard it. I heard it on Armchair Expert, Experts on Expert. It was a woman. I think her name is Marie Claire. She is a menopause expert. She's on Instagram. She is all over the place. She is going out and she is doing the good motherfucking work.

she is saying the things that need to be said that tell us what we're going through because there's a whole generation of women who have who are start a work generation x is coming into a man and we're a fucking feral generation okay we're the ones who raised ourselves and when we were being raised by someone, it was probably a wolf and, or a bigger sibling. And the fact is, is that we were out there latch keying it the fuck up. So we don't have that communication coming from the older generation telling us what we're going through. They're like, suck it up, rub some dirt on it.

And so now that we're here and we're trying, and we're the ones who are like, oh no. I need to know what the fuck is going on. We're figuring it out. We're having the conversations. We're saying things because the fuck's given so few. So this is the most important step that we're making in medicine that anybody, like anybody listening, who's in the medical field doing research on females needs to be more. We need to start focusing on how medicine affects the female body, how medicine affects the female mind.

because whether or not we're all the same until the hormones start bathing everything in different juices. So we need to start figuring out what it is that our hormones are doing because the medical field has largely left us ignored. I mean, when you look back through history, they found breast cancer in a man.

So if you are with someone, if you're with a woman who is facing, I'm going to say mid to late 30s to into her 40s, if you're with a woman and all of a sudden she's starting to develop changes in her moods and her attitude, she's getting hot flashes, she's sore, she's maybe talk to her and tell her, you know, there are some sources out there that are going to give her more insight as to what's going on with her. Because this affects how Thank you. there are some sources out there that are going to give her more insight as to what's going on with her.

Because this affects how your relationship is. The greatest number of divorces happen in menopause. Because we're so, things are just so incredibly different. So we need, so you guys need to kind of be aware of it, aware of what's happening to us because all of a sudden you think we're turning into a raving bitch, but literally it's just our emotions are going out of control. Our hormones are completely unbalanced. And the more your brain tries to regulate what's going on with your hormones, the more it's pumping in the wrong type of thing to combat what's happening.

And it becomes just a mixing bowl of mud. It's not great. So this is a conversation that needs to be a little bit more intergender. Okay. Guys, you got to be part of this conversation. You've got to start understanding what it is that women are going through so that you can have some grace so that you can have some understanding so that you can have some grace, so that you can have some understanding, so that you can have some empathy. Because this is a rough hang, dude. Rough hang. When you wake up in the middle of the night and you're covered in sweat. And I mean, not like a soft glow.

we're talking a full on soaking wet bath of sweat, just, and you can't, you can't cool down and you're, it's, it's a lot to go through and it's a lot to go through by yourself. So when you talk to someone, a woman, about menopause, tread softly. Be understanding that this is not an easy thing to go through because it takes so much out of you. Trying to figure out where your normal is takes so much out of you. Trying to figure out where your normal is takes so much out of you. And that is my PSA for today. Claudia, thank you so much for asking.

I know that this is a conversation we need to have more of. And as I go through hormone replacement therapy, as I go through this, um, I, I'm willing to share more about what my journey has been because I have been on it for approximately six weeks, maybe eight. I don't know exactly. It's been about six to eight weeks and I am starting to really feel the effects. I am starting to feel more joy. I am starting to feel more, um, anticipation, more buildup. And that is something that's been missing from my husband, missing from my husband. My husband loves the buildup, loves that inner play.

And because of the fact that I have been kind of checked out, it really sucks for him. So I am honestly grateful that I have found a way to get back to being me. And guys, it's okay for you to try to help figure out sources and information and, but make sure that you're doing it from the right experts, because there are experts out there who have been telling us for years that HRT causes cancers and all this other stuff that is patently untrue. Okay. And there are people who are pushing things like pellets, which overdose you in testosterone.

It puts, pellets are not a controllable source of testosterone. So I don't at all. If somebody's trying to talk you into a pellet step away don't do it um my personal journey was that they they offered me the pellet and I was like hells to the no because I knew I knew the information that pellets do not have um it's kind of like, you remember when we, you know, those, um, hormones that they, the birth control that they put in your arm for five years, occasionally they melt quicker than were expected. The same thing is happening with that testosterone pellet. Don't do it.

Um, you need to be in control of what's going into your body and the levels at which it's going in. So using a cream is much better. They actually have estrogen creams that you can rub on your vulva, which makes everything softer and wetter and more fun to play with. So HRT can be a fun experience because there are things that are just, once you stop producing viable eggs, your body's like, well, now it's time for you to die. So literally your body's trying to kill you.

So maybe, maybe let's get in front of it, get in front of it, get some HRT or talk to your doctor about what you're going through and see if they can see if they know as much as they need to know and do your own research, because I got to tell you a lot of times when you go to the gynecologist, they don't necessarily have all of the information that they probably should. So just make sure that you're advocating for yourself. Thank you for joining me today on the Pineapple Pinup, the Hot Wife Life podcast. And I just want to say thank you so much for all of those of you who have followed me.

I've reached a milestone on a couple of different platforms. And I just want to say thank you. Another thing I want to say in regards to this episode is be your own best advocate. Be the source of consent within you. Be the be the center of your own universe. But anyway, I hope that you enjoyed this episode. And if you have any questions, any topics you want covered, please don't hesitate to reach out to me at any of my socials, which are listed in the show's description, or you can hit me up by email at pineapplepinuppod at gmail.com. We'll see you next time.