History vs. Mystery

Transcript

Welcome to the Pineapple Pinnock Wife Life Podcast. On today's episode, I want to talk about old versus new, history versus mystery. immediately after my, my second date with the new bull Josh, who is actually coming into that title a little bit, I had a play date with Jeff. And I remember every reason why I love playing with Jeff. First of all, Jeff is the kind of guy who truly listens, truly hears when people talk to him, truly hears the information that you're trying to convey and gets the reasoning behind it. First of all, let me just say, he's amazing. I adore him.

so Jeff came over, and he and I have an instant rapport. We both have a sense of humor. We both joke around. We both like to giggle. We both have quirky little things that go on with us. And he likes to talk about quirky little things. He and I will often riff during sex and it is funny and fun and amazing. But in addition to that piece of what we are, because he's such an avid listener, he does all of the things that I need done without me having to ask for it. So he comes in with the hook every single time.

He will lick my clit while he is thrumming my G-spot to wake it up and make it the gushing surprise that everybody expects it to be. He hears me when I ask for things. And that is something, and I feel comfortable asking him for things. I feel comfortable talking to him about things that I need in the moment because I know that the reception of what I'm saying is getting through. That right there, that right there is history. That right there is trust built over time. Let me just tell you about the date, though. It's going to be very important moving forward.

He came in and we chatted because he is a dear friend. I adore him. We talked about what was going on in our lives. And then we moved casually upstairs where the action began. And like I said, he came in with the hook and the clit and woke my G-spot up to the point where I was bowing off the bed like, ah, because he had me there. Um, I of course also sucked his dick probably before all of that happened because I love deep throating Jeff. Oh my gosh. He like, it is like he and my throat know each other, and so my throat's not fighting him off. It's amazing.

I love it because all of the skill that sometimes feel like it's gone away came back to the forefront, and it was awesome. When he fucks me he gets so inside my brain he whispers things in my ear that make my toes curl he says things like good girl and that's right give it to me and it is and he gives me little instructions and I We'll be right back. girl and that's right and it is and he gives me little instructions and I like seriously I'm getting a little like pool of pool on my chair right now just even thinking about the things that he whispers in my ear. It's amazing.

So when you combine my ability to trust him, my ability to know that he hears me and his ability to understand things about me that he should not, given the fact that We are swingers in this. Like, he's a bull. I'm a vixen and like this is our like it shouldn't be this way but it is and it is amazing and because of that I have so few barriers. I have so few blockades against him. He can go in, play my vagina like a fiddle, play my mind like a concert piano, and get every result he's ever wanted from the female body to come out of me. And by that, I mean, we didn't just make Lake Wannacombe.

We made some sort of isthmus, something that feeds from a river, gets deeper than the ocean, and then feeds into the ocean. We are talking deep puddle that went a comforter, two sheets, a mattress pad, and soaked the bed to the point where it needed to air dry for more than a day it was the bed to the point where it needed to air dry for more than a day. It was astounding. And he expects nothing less from my body when he uses me.

When he comes and we play, that's what he expects because he knows the secret to unlocking the vase, I'm sorry, unlocking the safe, it is without a doubt, like it will curl your toes to just even think about how mentally and physically he owns my body at that moment. And he adores my husband. He is friendly with my husband and they can talk for, they can talk and it is awesome. And so my husband is like, gives him instructions before he goes in. I want your come here. I want to see this. And like a paid performer, he delivers.

He's not a paid performer, but he delivers on the request because that is history. That is comfort and connection and all of the things that build that physical emotional connection. Now, I am not a physical, mental, emotional connection kind of person. I am the kind of person who can perform one or two of those at the same time with no repercussions. That's me. I don't actually have to have the emotional connection to make it work, to get all of the results that we're looking for, but it helps. It really, really does. Okay. So now let's talk about mystery.

Mystery is new and intriguing and unknown and gives us that anticipation that what's going to happen. A little edge of anxiety mixed with hope. And there's a lot to be said for mystery. There's a lot to be said for going out and experiencing new and novel. Everybody's looking for some strange, right? But the fact is, when it comes to the debate over history versus mystery, a lot of times we're going to find ourselves craving the novel I'll see you next time. debate over history versus mystery, a lot of times we're going to find ourselves craving the novel to get what we get with history. Okay.

Craving that sense of being alive, because when you go out and experience things that are new to you you get that i feel so alive vibe it's a and it's a an electrode to your spine it is it makes you hyper aware of what's going on because your brain is in a new place and is constantly scanning for possible danger, okay?

That is why you feel so alive because your brain is actually functioning off of that anxiety that keep us alive, keep everything, keep everything alive, keep everything alive, keep everything, keep us alive, keep anxiety that keep us alive, keep everything, and you tend to absorb more information during that time. So that's why mystery is so appealing. That is why we're out there hunting for the new, hunting for the novel, hunting for an experience we have not yet experienced. Don't ever forget your history, okay?

Don't ever forget the people who have come before, who have truly touched you, who have truly come into your framework, your circle. So after the weekend when I had Jeff and Josh the same weekend, I went to a party and this party was something I'm going to get into next week. But it's a very prime example of history and mystery okay it was so much fun connecting with my friends with my people who I've played with multiple times through the years like through the years and found kinship with.

That is the thing that you can't, you don't have automatically when you, when you're hunting constantly for mystery. Okay. Okay, so let's take a beat now and talk about when you have the connection that you're looking for. And you have somebody who you are planning to play exclusively with, but not exclusively. That's a bad word. That's a bad word in this town. In this community, exclusive has its own connotation. So when I have a bull, I play exclusively with him. If I'm playing bareback with him, he's the only person I'm playing bareback with. I don't put anybody else at risk.

I don't put anybody at risk in those situations. I play bareback one person and that's it. So that's when I'm saying exclusive, that's what I'm talking about. I haven't gotten to that point yet where I have a new exclusive. So I am, because obviously there's steps you have to take to get to that point. Testing needs to be done, making sure everybody's healthy to begin with. So that that way we're not creating an environment where we are being unsafe together. We want to make sure that it's as safe as possible because I know that this is a dangerous, this is a dangerous pastime.

I'm going to say it again. It's a dangerous pastime, but you mitigate as much of the danger as you possibly can. Okay. So when you have that trust, that moment, when you are, this is the person that I'm going to be playing quote unquote exclusively with then, and you take that next step and you do the testing and you decide this is what you guys are going to do. That is a trust bond. Okay. And when you do something dangerous outside of that, and then bring that back, you're basically putting more than just yourself, your partner, and your bull at risk. Like, you're ruining your reputation.

There's like all sorts of things that come into play here. We are a small community despite the fact that we are a large and varied community, okay? We need to believe and rely on one another. When we say what we're going to do, we need to be the people who do it because the risk out there is too great to not keep that trust on. I am an, I love to play, absolutely love to play. And I love to play in scenarios with people that, where it's all mutual. So what I'm asking my community to abide by is say what you mean and mean what you say. Okay.

If you're going to promise someone exclusivity in this realm, make sure you're giving it to them. Because I'll harken back to history versus mystery, feeling alive in that moment, feeling alive, like on the edge of something is awesome until you hurt people. So just remember, do what you say, say what you mean. And if you're not ready to do that, if you want to play, if you want to breed play, which is absolutely something that is out there in the world and people really want to be a part of it, that is awesome. But be honest about it.

Don't ever tell anyone that you're exclusive with them and then don't be. You know what I mean? Breed play has its own level of risk that is kind of the point, actually. The idea that you could get pregnant with someone else's baby and your husband becomes responsible for this child, that's kind of a new level kink within what it is that we're doing. And I'll see you next time.

of a a new level kink within what it is that we're doing and the only thing I can come back to is you have to be honest in your words and intentions when you do this you have to have consent from everybody to know what they're up against, to know what they're going to be doing. And even like, even if you are fantasizing this, because honestly, I, I got my factory pulled out and I installed a playpen. I have a hysterectomy, a partial hysterectomy, and like, I ain't getting pregnant. So that's not a factor for me. I'm also of an age where if I did get pregnant, what the hell? No.

So, but when breed play is part of your kink, you just have to make sure that everybody is on board and know what the possible outcomes are. So, bear that in mind. I want to talk about in relationships, jealousy, because obviously for the swinger lifestyle, jealousy has a part to play in it. Mostly it's a jealousy kink where you like feeling that jealousy. But when it is, when jealousy is a barrier to entry, my question is, where's that stemming from?

If jealousy is something that is preventing you from exploring the lifestyle, or it is creating too much stress for you to actually follow through with doing the whole swing thing, but it's something that you want to try, I'm just trying to figure out where is, what is it that the jealousy is stemming from? What fear is this evoking? Jealousy for the way I understand it, obviously not an emotion I struggle with too much. Um, from what I understand it, obviously not, not an emotion I, I struggle with too much.

Um, from what I understand, jealousy is either a fear of losing something that's yours or a fear that they will find something better than you. Um, and I don't really understand And... Thank you better than you. And I don't really understand all the nuances because I'm sure that there are other nuances to it. And a lot of it might be just like, I'm not one who likes to share my toys. I never passed kindergarten kind of thing.

So I'm, I'm really trying to delve into this to figure out what it is that is so vital to the brain cells that you can't see the compliment of playing with somebody else, but then having your partner choose to come home to you. My thing is, is that I like the fact that I choose my husband every time. I play with other people, but I choose to live with my husband, to come home to my husband, to be with my husband, because that is the greatest compliment. It's not because I have no other option. It's because that's the person I want to share my life with.

That's where I feel like it is a total compliment to be, to be a swinger, swing away, but always know that they're coming back. Um, that is kind of, and I don't know if I'm thinking about this incorrectly. I don't know if I'm thinking about this in a way that's not making a lot of sense to, but this is my question out there. What is the stem of the jealousy? What is the stem root that is causing, I don't want to share my toys, or he might find something better out there, or what is it that is the root cause of where jealousy is coming from.

So obviously, since I don't have my own personal experiences with it, I'm asking my audience, I'm asking you, you know, let's have the discussion. Let's talk about why is jealousy, which, I mean, obviously jealousy in the lifestyle is kind of a kink. It's kind of a, you know, oh, you know, it's part of the mixture of the emotions that root around in the belly and the anxiety and all of those things kind of coalesce into this feeling that is a lot of the reason why people do this. A lot of the reason why people participate in this, because they like feeling that little bit of insecurity.

And then that, you know, just, it's, oh, I can't even describe the, the mixture because it's like part anxiety, part pleasure, part jealousy, part wantingness. It's desire, it's so many things, and it's very complicated to explain, but erotic to feel. It is something where you're watching this person that you're spending your life with through mutual agreement that is participating in something that doesn't necessarily include you, but it's kind of about you. For me, there's so much in that mixture.

There's so much in that, that when jealousy is actually a bar between the actual, like that's one of the things that's impeding you. I just want to know what it is that jealousy is stemming from that's causing that delay, causing that to be a stopping point for you. Let me know. You can hit me up on my email, pineapplepinuppod at gmail.com. You can hit me up at my Insta. The Insta is on the description of the episode. I really just kind of want to know where does jealousy fit in your play or where does jealousy fit in you not playing?

If you haven't made the leap yet, if you're looking for what is the jealousy stemming from? And that's a conversation that obviously two people need to have together. Because jealousy being part and parcel with the whole lifestyle, the whole arrangement, the whole agreement is sort of an interesting dichotomy. If it is too much for one person to bear, but not for the other person, where do you, where do you find the compromise? Where do you come together with that? Honestly, hit me up. Let me know. Let's, let's talk about it.

Let's figure out what it is that is where this jealousy, and obviously everybody is their own individual. And I'm sure I'm going to get a lot of answers to this question, but that's kind of what I want to know. I want to know what it is, where it's coming from, what we can do to explore it in a more kink-filled way, in a more erotic tone, in a less possessiveness? What is it? Where is it? How are we going to move past it? That kind of thing. All right. Hit me up. Thank you so much for joining me today on the Pineapple Pinup Hot Wife Life Log podcast. I so grateful you guys are listening.

So grateful you're out there. I've gotten hit up a lot recently and I am so happy to hear from you. I'm so happy to know that there are people out there who can, who are hearing me and they're getting something from this. And even if you're not, even if you're just here for the sexy, welcome. And hit me up if there's anything else you guys want to talk about.