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Transcript

to the pineapple pin of the hot wife life podcast on today's podcast i talk about life being life in and i talk about a bunch of podcasts that have really affected me this week um take a listen uh they the ones I mention are Cuck My Life, Home's Room, Lovers by Shan. I'm going to tell it to you straight. life is a cock-blocking son of a bitch. In the past couple of weeks, I have had multiple opportunities to get together with various and sundry. And every single time something has come up that has made it so that I can't get together or do the thing.

Um, so I had planned to meet Kay, um, a gentleman I have played with before. He's the gentleman I had a threesome with, with, um, Andrea. Um, he had planned to come over and spend the evening with me, but I got the most terrible migraine and I had to go home early from work and could not meet up with him. So it was okay. Score one for life. All right. So I tried Thursday evening to get together with a gentleman who I have known for a while and he was going to meet me somewhere and we met and everything was fine except there were so many people there.

There were so many people around that it made it impossible for us to do anything. So score one for life. I had plans to go to a party, have a bull come over, have a possibility of another bull come over, over the weekend. And rather than do that, I had to work on my house due to HOA violations, and my child came over to help and spent the entire weekend here.

um so that was three opportunities bing down for the count the fact is is that life is going to do this sometimes life is going to get in the way of the lifestyle because we are passionate about this as, you know, fun and engaging and stress relieving and how we spend our off time. But unfortunately, sometimes that doesn't always work out. Now, rolling with the punches, my husband and I decided to play. Play on our own. We have been so much more playful with one another recently. Toys and just dirty talk, sending each other messages.

We have been really upping our game as far as our relationship goes. And sometimes when life is getting in the way of your fun, it gives you the opportunity to look around and see what's closer, what's more, like what's readily available, and gives you the opportunity to appreciate it. The lifestyle tends to give you this outlet where you fall into a kind of a pattern where you go and you get dicked down and then you come back and you get reclaimed and then, ah, that's it.

But there's opportunity to go back to where we started, back to the role play, back to the titillation, back to the desire that we each had for each other, even before we started in the lifestyle. And when you have the opportunity, when life literally throws you curveball, you can go back and just rekindle the moments and the relationship that you are. And I mean, trust me when I tell you my communication is off the charts with my husband right now. My communication has never been better. And we are working through the life stuff and doing all the things.

Now, I cannot stress enough how important it is to fertilize the garden that you're living in, okay? To make sure that you are tending to your relationship, tend to the everyday moments when you can be slightly, you know, romantic or dirty with one another. When you have those opportunities to sneak in a quick tickle, a quick kiss, a quick grope, a quick text message saying, you know what, I'm thinking about you and I'm getting a little, getting a little damp. It's good because the whole point of the lifestyle is not to take over for your marriage.

It is supposed to enhance the relationship that you are in. It is supposed to give the relationship that you are in a building, like elevation. It is supposed to give it, you know, building blocks to make it stronger, tougher. Trust me, it has been the most beautiful thing for my marriage.

When I have life, throwing life-isms at me, and adult shit, being adulting all over the fuck, and having to put other priorities before the priority of the lifestyle, it gives me the opportunity to really touch base with my husband and really go back to a place where we still fantasized about what this would bring to us. And now that we know, we just build on those fantasies. Because there are people out there who literally only do the lifestyle a couple times a year. They go for quality over quantity. That is awesome.

My husband and I feel like we are a bit on a time clock because my husband, his health is not the greatest, but he wants to live it to the fullest while we can. And that is something that he and I are going out there and doing when we can, when we have the opportunity, we're going out there and doing as much as we can. And sometimes life be life and an adulting be adulting. And we aren't allowed to do it, or we don't have the, you know, we're, we're just short on opportunity.

So that being said, that just gives us time to refocus our energy, refocus who we were before the lifestyle became a thing, who we were when all we had were the fantasies to bolster us. It is a little bit more real life now. It is a little bit more, so it's a little bit more reminiscent than future tense, but it was, it's still incredibly hot. It's still incredibly lovely to be in that space where our focus isn't diverted 16 other places. Our focus is devoted to each other.

And it's nice to technically take a break whether you wanted to or not and focus in on what was what this all was about focus in on the relationship again for just a minute and mind you it's not like I'm not tending to the garden regularly, but this was just a cavalcade of adult shit that came down the pike, life shit that came down the pike that made it so that our play was coitus interruptus, if you will.

So that just gave me the opportunity to tease him a little bit because we had, like, I do try to tease him when I have something coming up and he wants me to tease him more, of course, but my ADD makes it so that sometimes I don't focus as well on it as I should. But this time I got the opportunity to actually reach out and tease him and tell him and let him know that, hey, what if I tried this? And he was very excited about the whole thing.

And we were very excited about the whole thing, which led to us having higher play value with one another, even though the things that we had planned fell through so hard. But that's it sometimes. Sometimes you make your, you shift your focus and it gives you some time to really look at what you have and really look at what you're building with someone. And it's fucking phenomenal. I don't like, it's great that my husband and I had these wonderful plans and it's kind of great that they fell through.

I mean, not really like great, but like it was, it was an opportunity to look at how the lifestyle is enhancing my marriage, how it is evolving within my marriage. to me was uplifting and eye-opening and I'm glad that I got this moment to really reflect about where we started and how for a very long time it was just fantasies and kind of go back to that for half a minute. Now, mind you, I'm going straight back into the life next week. I am going to go get some dick, but giving yourself that time to bear down on your relationship and really play within that sphere makes it so lovely.

I mean, charming and romantic and it's all things. And I don't feel like it was an opportunity lost. I feel like we gained a lot with each other. And that's kind of the main focus of how the lifestyle usually works. The lifestyle is never supposed to fix a bad marriage. That's not what it's designed to do. What it's designed to do, it's designed to take a good marriage and make it that much more. it's designed to make your fantasies a little bit more reality, but still that core, that relationship, that marriage is what you are.

That's what you're, you're building with the lifestyle, at least in my opinion. Now, mind you, other people do it for other reasons, and there's a lot of different reasons out there and every single person, but you're never going to fix bad things, things that aren't working. You're never going to fix them by throwing in more wrenches, just throwing the wrenches at it. Okay. You have to use the tools. You have to use the tools. You have to build with the tools. It can't just be like, but you got to know walking in that the lifestyle is going to throw a bunch of roadblocks up.

It's going to put a bunch of things, a bunch of hurdles that you didn't know you were going to have to climb over in front of you. It's going to put things like jealousy in your way. It's going to put things like, um, emotional connection in your way. It's going to put things like hurt feelings in your way. And the only thing I can say is that you have to have a good basis of communication in order to climb those hurdles together. Over the weekend, I did do two podcasts. I did an episode of Cook My Life with the boys from that show. We had a great conversation. I rambled on entirely too long.

I know you guys are surprised that I would ramble, but I did. But it was so much fun talking about the lifestyle with the guys who give me the reflection of what it is for my husband. I have been listening to their podcast and I have been talking about their podcast because it is great to hear the vocabulary that my husband is feeling and give it some perspective, give it some understanding.

Like it's almost educational as to how I can hear him better, talk about the things that he wants and understand a little bit more where it's coming from, that this isn't abnormal or strange or new, or it's just, this is another layer of this same psychology. And then I also did Home's Room. It is, it's a podcast that does something where they want to teach you. It's like you're going into Home Room and they're giving you education about one specific topic while talking to your friends. And it was so much fun because he had bright insightful questions that he wanted me to answer.

And I hope I did it, but a lot of times I'm falling off on a tangent. so I hope I wasn't too terribly ADD on that episode, but check them out. Because anybody who's putting information out about the lifestyle and giving it legitimacy, giving it voice, is without a doubt somebody who's trying to make things better. We are not all, we're not freaks. We're not, we're normal people who are pursuing desire in a consensual way. And that is, that is a language that cannot be stated enough. That is the kind of message that needs to get out there as much as possible.

And the nice thing is, is that the cuck boys, they asked me very, very great questions. Like we talked about menopause, which I'm really sorry is not being talked about enough in the spheres between men and women. We're getting a lot more information about menopause. And believe me when I tell you the women are lapping it the fuck up. We are desperate for anything that tells us what the fuck is going on with our bodies. We're desperate for anything that's been researched about our bodies, because I got to tell you, that is still severely lacking.

We're in the year 2025 and we're still, most of the drugs that are being tested on the world are being tested on males only. So sometimes we have to spark conversations on our own to get it out there. But anyway, back to the subject. But the fact that women are out there and they are eager and they're anxious to get information about menopause is normal. And it is probably something that, you know, is really, really great. But let's take it to the next level. Let's take it to the next level so that maybe guys hear the same information. Maybe guys understand what is happening over here.

Maybe guys get the information so that they can keep an eye on what's happening with their wife and have a little bit more understanding because education is fucking power. Education is the kind of thing that the more you know, the more you can see, the more you can understand and the more understanding you can be in a realm like menopause because the changes are severe and they're crazy and they're coming fast and they're coming hot and you don't always feel like you're 100% in control of what's going on. And it is frightening.

And it is your moods are swinging all around and you can't regulate your own fucking emotions. What is that? Why is that? And if you're having these things and you are not seeing the signs but somebody else is and they have the ability to say how are you feeling how are your joints doing how do you do you have that ringing in your ears or they hear you talk about the ringing in your ears and how stiff your joints are. And all of a sudden they're like, Oh, Hey, you know, I heard a podcast where they were talking about these symptoms and those are kind of symptoms of like perimenopause.

Maybe you should talk to the doctor and see what, what's going on with your hormone levels. Not in a, you're crazy kind of way, but in a, I really think that there might be something going on here that we might be able to address and bring you back to normalcy. Because I got to tell you, the sooner you get help for the symptoms that you're having, first of all, the symptoms get better. Second of all, you have a less likely chance to develop heart disease and die. Heart disease happens so often in women as they get into menopause and because all of those functions are shutting down.

When you get on hormone replacement therapy, it increases your ability to stave off heart disease and heart attacks this is important information this is important information and i think it's important for guys to know it too because we can't always be our own best advocates sometimes we need help from the people around us to help us see what it is that we're going through and know that we're not fucking crazy and that we're not just writing it off to being, oh, ow, I slept badly. Sometimes it's not about sleeping badly. Wow. This is not going to become a menopause podcast, I promise you.

But this is something that I am dealing with in my everyday life. And the fact that the Cuck guys really talked to me and really had a conversation about how they can be a part of the conversation was awesome and amazing and important. And I really am grateful for them reaching out to me and having me on their podcast. And you should definitely take a listen because they are bright, funny guys who are telling the truth about the lifestyle and what it means and what it means to be a cuck.

I cannot tell you how glad I am that they reached out to me, how glad I am that they found my podcast and how glad I am that they sent me their podcast. Also home's room, they are taking the time to talk about subjects that don't necessarily get the conversations they deserve. So take a listen. And honestly, I really hope that you guys find something valuable from that because I know that I did.

I was listening to a podcast where they were interviewing a sex educator, someone who had taken the time to learn how to teach other people how to not only how sex works, but how to enjoy sex, how to enjoy having sex, how to enjoy sex in the way that your body responds to sex. Um, her name is Shan. Oh my God. Boodram b-o-o--D-R-A-M. And of course she focuses mostly on women because that is where her knowledge base comes from. There is a male counterpoint to her. His name is Alex Grundy, G-R-U-N-D-Y.

And the thing is, is that when you are in the lifestyle, it is very easy to get wrapped up in the atmosphere. But one of the things that these sex educators really try to drive home, really try to bring to the forefront is you need to know what turns you on, what makes you not only ready to play, but also what makes you want to get ready to play? Where does it start for you? In the shower, picking out your underwear, putting on the outfit you're going to wear, text messages between you and your partner. I mean, there's all sorts of things that are getting you ready to want to be ready.

And I found it so fascinating listening to this podcast with this woman. And she has a podcast of her own. It's called, I believe it's called Lovers with Shan. And it is super informative of how our bodies, how our minds, how we tend to process and how our bodies work when we're doing certain things, when we're doing the things that make our body turn on. I find this super fascinating because in the realm of the lifestyle, there's a lot of get ready, be ready.

Well, in the lifestyle I play in, um, that may not be true in like swapping and, um, other types of play where, you know, finding a bull and focusing solely on being almost a throuple. But I find it super interesting that we who are so very, very sex positive could step it up a notch, step it up and bring the heat, bring the sexual tension, bring the mystery. Because a lot of times, especially people who've been married for a long time, you kind of fall into this, oh, he touched my knee. He's ready to go. He wants to have sex tonight.

So we kind of tend to fall into this rut where one thing happens and we're like, oh, we're expected to perform now. But part of sex being sexy is that we don't know what's going to happen. And that was one of the things that the lifestyle really brought to my marriage was there was a lot of like routine involved in what we were doing because it's what ended up working out with our with our life.

Occasionally we would flip the script a little bit, but most of the time it was pretty same day, same time, same day, you know, not same time, same day, robot-like, but it was, it was fairly, fairly just like that. It was fairly rut-like. And then we started exploring lifestyle and what lifestyle, what we hoped lifestyle would bring to us. And that started bringing more into the relationship.

And when that brought in more of the mental aspect of the sex, when that brought into the room, a different angle, a different fantasy, a different something new, it started to really change how we saw and played with one another. There was a new light, a new angle, um, a new mystery to solve a new unknown. And I don't, and it's the unknown that's exciting. Okay. Not knowing that it is going to be, you know, three pumps in a dump or whatever it is. And that is not how I had sex. Okay. Trust that.

But, you know, knowing that it's going to be different than the routine, knowing that it's going to be different than we will start by doing oral, You know, like knowing it's going to be different gives your mind, more engagement, more, um, more engagement, more paths to run down.

And when your mind is engaged in the act, when your brain is online and it is part of the physical act, it is so much hotter, whether it's a little bit of dirty talk, whether it's a little bit of fantasy thrown in, whether it's a little bit of, um, a lot less talking about what the kids did at soccer practice, whatever it is, whatever it is that's going to engage the animalistic side of figuring out, you know, getting us wet, getting us hot, getting us ready. The brain is going to be the best part of fucking. It always is.

It's once you've engaged that brain everything else starts to soften and liquefy and get and i'm sorry i'm speaking from a woman's point of view i'm also sure that once you start engaging the brain and get get a man to the point where he's in his midbrain, where he's nothing but an animal that wants to fuck and mate and do and spew seed, breed, if you will. When they're in their midbrain, it's very raw and hot. And that is another aspect that is really, really delightful.

But getting there, getting to that animal passion, that deep down desire to do the thing that makes us human and carries on the species, the very core of what we are biologically designed to do and getting our brain involved in that. So now you have not, you're firing multiple parts of the brain. The romance and the fantasy and the desire to breed all come together and become this wet, sloppy, hot fuck fest. So the thing is, is that there are ways to do those things. And nobody gave you a manual. Nobody said, here's how you have sex. And here's how you make it good sex.

Nobody ever handed us that. Well, not me anyway. And watching porn is not reality watching porn is not reality. Watching porn is watching someone else play out an overblown fantasy. It doesn't put you in the room at the moment with engaging all the core parts of your brain. So there's absolutely no shame in trying to learn what is going to make sex hotter for you? What about your body is going to enhance the experience? What about your mind is going to take that physical and combine it with the mental and make it mind-blowing? What is going to take you so far past the edge?

What is going to take you so deeply out there? And the thing is, is that the core to knowing how great sex can be is knowing how you like it. Because I don't know if you know this or not, but one of the hottest thing you can do is tell somebody what you like and then have them do it. Whether you're a male telling a female, whether you're a female telling a male, anybody's going to be like, oh God damn, she wants that. And, or, oh God damn, he wants that and I can give it to him. Holy fuck. it's amazing.

It's amazing how someone looks you straight in your eye and says, I want you to rub the arch of my foot while you suck my toe. And you do it and you get the response, fucking outrageous. It's amazing. But in order to be able to tell somebody that's what you want, you have to know. You have to know what it is that you are looking for. And the only way to do that is by self-exploration. And I literally mean you need to explore your body.

You need to explore your own body and know from the top of your head to the bottom of your toes, you need to spend time learning what feels good to you and what doesn't. and if you have a partner, you can definitely set aside time to massage each other from head to toe and find out what points bring you sexual enhancement and what parts just kind of, oh, that feels nice. You can do this by yourself. You can do this with a partner. You can even hire a professional masseuse and explain to them what it is you're trying to discover and ask them to go very slowly, but do the entire body.

So you can figure out what it is that makes your body tingle. What makes your spine sizzle a little bit? What makes just everything in you want to fuck? What makes everything in you want to seek release and that being said imagine how much greater you could make sex and because we only have one journey on this earth I don't know.

make sex and because we only have one journey on this earth I'm sorry one conscious journey depending on your on your religious bent we only have one conscious journey on this ball on this little marble in the sky so why not make the best of it why not take the reins and find the way to bring the highest possible pleasure in the safest possible way?

And it helps you determine what you find sexy and what is absolutely not what is an absolute no and knowing what your absolute no's are and knowing what your absolute yeses are only helps you to be communicative with your partner with multiple partners and it will i'm not even even kidding you, it will raise your stock wherever you go. Telling people what you want from them and letting them give it to you. Good God, it is the hottest thing ever. Anyway, that's just my particular two cents on the subject.

But if you are looking for information about how to make sex just a little bit hotter, or how to enjoy sex more than you already do, definitely check out these Shan Boodram and Alex Grundy. They, and I'm sure there are tons more. I mean, Dan Savage, he's out there educating people. There's so many people out there who are taking the time to get the knowledge and share it with you and talk to, and, you know, talk to the void to give you the information that you need to make sex more. And that is time well spent.

But I just wanted to put it out there that these, there is options out there if it is something that you want to dive deeper into. And I personally think that the journey of self-discovery makes everything a little bit more pleasurable. Thank you so much for joining me today. If you have any questions or comments, you can reach out to me on all my socials. They're listed in the show's description. And you can always reach me at pineapplepinuppod at gmail.com. I am always happy to hear from listeners and take your questions.

Remember that we have friends over at privateadventures.net in case you're looking for anything to add some enhancement. Remember the promo code PineapplePinup10 to let them know that I sent you. And take some time to figure out what makes it hot for you. That's never a bad thing. We'll see you next time.