Krazy Truth #90 Hot for the chase

Transcript

Hey kids, the program you're about to listen to contains some adult situations, adult language, themes, and other adult topics. If you're easily offended, this show's not for you. Hey you crazy motherfuckers, welcome back to another edition of Crazy Truth. I'm your host with the most. I'm Cole. I'm here with the lovely, lovely and pooch-carrying Miss Amanda. Hey. And we are here to titillate, tantalate, spew, juice, make you moist with information. But before we start, guess what, kids? This is episode, he's licking shit already. This is season three, episode 90. Now, what?

This is episode three, episode 90. Now, what this means is in 10 mere weeks, in 10 shows, so soon, you can taste it like the dew on a summer flower. It is our 100th episode, and I have a feeling it's going to be something special for our 100th episode. Ooh, I didn't think of that.

Yep, that's the show where you're taking it up the butt live on the air bring your boy toy in i'm taking that up no guts no glory anyways okay but before we start before we start oh my god i lost a cock ring uh Before we start, before we start uh let's give a big shout out to our sponsors www.sexystripperclothing.com quality have all sizes to fit all ladies or gentlemen if you so need. Anywho, so make sure you give them a visit. Absolutely. And, don't forget kids, we're going to be talking about it a little bit more here in just a bit.

It's time for the big old fucking start registering for Crazy Summer Nights. We don't learn much at Crazy Summer Nights, but we get naked and we spend the whole weekend that way. And that's pretty damn awesome. So we'll talk more about that in un momento. I'm not even going to go there. Okay. So, hey, first, this weekend, so we just got done. It's Tuesday. We normally record on a Sunday. It's Monday. Or it's Monday. We normally record on a Sunday, but we were too worn out. And that is because a big, huge thank you to the CASBA Group of the Year Island Writers out of Grand Island, Nebraska.

They threw their Valentine's Day party, which they had us there. They let us attend. Which was awesome. And we danced the night away. We did. And we're old as fuck and we're sore as shit. But we had a great time. So hey, you know what?

For those that don't remember or don't know, we record in front of our live Crazy uh crazy chasmo page it's our secret page don't tell the others if you want to join send us an email uh but if you want to know more about create about um about island riders event you get on our page uh we love uh put posting their events up there and it is a great time they've got some things coming up for this summer and you want to be a part of it so shout out to them now also but wait but wait there's more Here we go.

got some things coming up for this summer and you want to be a part of it so shout out to them now also but wait but wait there's more and what was i was gonna say i have no idea oh no i remember what i was gonna say that's right now so each week obviously i watch the statistics on our page right and on on the show and where who's listening and and where so we've got this pocket of people of folks that listen from anchorage alaska okay and and they listen every single week if you're one of that pocket of people send us an email i want to talk to you send us an email so you send us an email at crazy k-r-a--Z-Y dot Kazba, K-A-S-B-H at gmail.com.

So if you're one of them listening to us from Alaska, let us know. And you can do it during the daytime. That's because it's night all the time up there right now. That was horrible. You know I'm kidding. Because here's the thing, we want to travel, we want to hit all 50 states. Which includes you guys up there in Alaska. Now Miss Amanda Thank you.

you know i'm kidding no i just because here's the thing we want to travel we want to hit all 50 states which includes you guys up there in alaska now miss amanda is from mississippi so timing is everything in our world we need to figure out when the very utmost chance of it being the warmest would be to get up there so just throwing that out there but seriously regardless we want to talk to you so send us a thing an email a thing Thank you. So send us a thing. An email. A thing. Ain't nothing but a thing. You with me? Yes, I am following. You're kind of quiet tonight.

We're all like calm and stuff. What the fuck's wrong with this shit? I'm tired. Okay. I wonder why. She lets her fingers do the typing typing maybe if you weren't trying to keep an international fucking schedule it'd be a little bit different isn't that the truth good morning sweetie good night honey good morning sweetie hey welcome to work then all boys in between what do I do I pet the. So, wow. By the way, we're starting a new CASBA International Division.

If you're a guy that's headed by Miss Amanda or if you're a bisexual girl that's headed by Miss Amanda, I just hope to get to go along on one free trip. That's all I hope for. I'm going to be her bitch and carry her luggage. This will be awesome. Hi, who's this guy? Oh, don't worry about him. Put the bag over here and go be off with you. Anyway, so no. I'm done making fun of Princess. No, you're not. You never are. Probably not. Do you want to say anything? No, you're doing pretty good on your own. No, I'm getting myself in a world of fucking hurt is what I'm doing.

Okay, so I just had something just fly out of my head, like spittled. That was weird. I remember doing that as a kid where you tilt your tongue back and it's like fucking, I wonder if you did that during sex. Wouldn't it be cool if you could like tilt your clit just right in And you use it like a water gun. Some people probably can. That's pretty fucking awesome. If you can use your clit as a water gun, we want you to send us videos to Crazy Truth because that shit is impressive. And I think there's probably some sort of free gift we can give for that.

If you can use your dick as a water gun, everybody can, but it's got to be quality. You got to get a good bend to it. Then as a water gun. Everybody can, but it's got to be quality. You got to get a good bend to it. Then send that to them. Some people have super soakers and some people have little bitty shoes. Remember that when I was a kid? It doesn't matter. Okay. Yeah, no. I mean, it doesn't. You just got to... But you remember that? Never mind. Oh, God. Okay. You're got to... But you remember that? It was water... Never mind. Oh, God. Okay. You're, like, not helping me at all tonight.

You're just totally just sitting there, fucking whatever. Get ready to say something, because I'm going to take a drink, and then there's dead air. One, two... Why do I have to say something? Wait, just say it when I'm not talking. That's the whole idea with this shit. Okay. One, two, three. Why do I have to say something? I want to see if you'd spit pop on your nose. Because there's only two of us that do this show. That's why. So if I don't say anything and you don't say anything, then we just sit here. Kind of like what we just did right there. And that's okay. Complete dead spot.

Oh, my God. Is silence a lot okay? Not on podcast. No. Okay, let's put it this way. If we were doing a recording for... No. No, you can't. No. God. Okay, well, this show is pretty much fucked. Thanks for coming, kids.

Now, okay, so why don't we hurry and jump right into some questions let's jump in there can you do that again let's jump in there for those that are just listening all of a sudden uh i'm pretty sure that amanda had a stroke when she said that all of a sudden she's like or an orgasm no because i know how you do your orgasms here, everybody Here's my imitation of Miss Amanda Having an orgasm That's the sound of me holding my breath And that goes I sound like a fucking duck Kind of like a seal Yes Don't you remember when we first got into this shit That people would like You'd be mid-orgasm and people would stop Because they thought you were like choking on your tongue It's like no no She holds her breath No no she wants to finish coming now That would be great great.

Yes, I hold my breath. Yeah. This is how you know when you've won with Miss Amanda. When she goes, you have to stop for just a second so I can catch my breath. That's when you get up and you go have a cigarette and you dance at her like fucking Rocky out of the ring. You can get her, her legs will be all quivering and shaking, and she's panting and stuff. There was one time when we were having sex, and there was something, I don't know what happened, but I was just breathing funny, and I couldn't get a regular breath in. Well, that's actually just because I'm like 700, 700 pounds.

I was probably squishing you. You're not 700 pounds. So sometimes if I can't make her cum, I just put all my body weight on it to make her cum. And then it makes me feel good. You only did that once. And that's when you were really drunk and I said, get off. That's when I passed out on you. That was pretty fucking sexy and hot. But I want to fuck. Fine. And you crawled on top and then you like laid there. Get off. And you were already with all the key words. There are key words. Here's the secret. If you don't want to fuck me for very long there's a few key words you have to know. Daddy.

That's a really good one. My first name. Oh cool. or some close semblance to it usually do I make you happy or does that make you happy somewhere with the daddy thing in there is usually pretty good daddy will do it if you use daddy and my first name in a sentence like don't do it right now because I'll cum in my pants. You can use daddy and Cole in the same sentence when it becomes messed up. No. I guess it depends on the if it's eat walruses or some shit that would be messed up. Yes. Daddy. Oh. Yeah, I could do that. Yeah. See? And, oh, there it went. Pop.

We'll take a quick break here while I go clean myself. So there's key phrases to know. And every guy has them. Every guy has the hot button that you can fucking push. It's like the Insta-cum. It's kind of like a factory reset. And shoot your load and good night. That's the way that works. was not our question how to make cold come fast believe it or not that was not so for young ladies that might in the future hook up with me please don't put those sentences together because then we followed with do your line again. Or do that sentence or do it again. Oh, the yes, daddy? Yeah, yeah. Oh, cool.

Yes, daddy. You didn't get both words, damn it. I did too. I said yes, daddy first and you're like, yeah. And I went, oh, cool. I said them together. Basically what will happen if you put those two words together and we're like a swinger hookup, the next thing you're going to hear is, oh, fuck, I'm so sorry. So please, please do not use those. So true. Only in case of an emergency, like, you know, emergency text, you got to bolt. Then use those. Otherwise, please don't use those words if you don't have to. Individually, you can use them. Like, if I pull your hair. All right.

That's why we don't do shows on mine. Very rarely do I use either one of those. No, you really don't. No. No. And it sucks. If you love me. If you love me, you'll say this. Currently looking forward. I to starting a new section of the show. It's called the classified section. And this week, we're looking for someone who will use the word coal and daddy in a sentence often. Okay. Let's spew on to questions. No, let's slide into questions. Slide away. How super is it? It's a pretty big water slide. Yay. Cush. Okay. It's a pretty big water slide. Yay. Cush. Okay. It's kind of been me all day.

Just saying. That's because you've become 12 again. I have. I don't know what the hell. Because you see me, you're like, hee, For those that can't see her, she's got a giant shitty grin. She looks just like Chessire Cat off the house in Wonderland. You're a fucking dirty girl. And that is so fucking hot. I don't know what you're talking about. Uh-huh. I'm an innocent little angel. Uh-huh. Remember, I do the laundry around here. Uh-huh. You're innocent. Whatever, Captain Crunchy. Don't be gross. Well, that's not gross.

That just means you're excited Wet all day long Moist You know what It's a good way to make sure no one borrows your chair Here can I borrow your I don't think I'll take that chair No she smells wonderful when she's wet It's a nice smell But I swear to god if there's one more day Where you come and go oh my god Feel it It's like it's a pet When you're close to 50 It's amazing You want me to carry A spray bottle around like we're training it again You train cats You train pussies that way? So we can train your pussy. Bad pussy. That was horrible. That was funny shit.

Have we asked a question yet? No. I'm sorry. We were talking about your drippy pussy. All right. Which is much better than a drippy dick, kids. Remember this at home. A drippy pussy means you're excited. A drippy dick means you need to go to the doctor. Just saying. Okay. Is that a thing? Yeah. Yeah, there are some of these that it burns when you pee and your drip starts dicking. That's really... Oh, my God. No, your drip will never start dicking, but your dick will start dripping. Yeah. Ew? Okay. And it burns when you pee. All right.

So then you've got fire water dripping out of your fucking pecker. Ouch. Yeah. Don't do that, kids. You know what you do? You use one condom. One condom, brand condoms. And you, too, will not have drippy dick. Just saying. Very true. There you go. All right. what's going on does anybody have somebody said anything is anybody even listening to us live hi okay awesome hi all right so in alaska go to alaska in june is that somebody from alaska that's on our page no well how do they know who is it say? Say a first name. It's okay. We won't tell the others. Nobody's listening to this but us.

Who is it? Bone's a girlfriend. Ah, it's all right. I won't say her name right anyways. You never do. I never do. I don't know how many times I have to correct you. But somebody said it was we were on good terms and they did not bring fucking cookies to KWN. It's not turkey either. Yes, it is. Anyways. I got your back. Okay, so let's go ahead and do a question or I'm never going to get those cookies again. By the way, those are the best fucking cookies ever. Just saying. I can feel myself getting fatter and creeping towards a heart attack every time I eat one of them. It's awesome. Mmm.

Fingers taste like lard. Anyways. Why are you looking at me like that? I'm just rolling my eyes because that's what I do. But they can't hear that. We really have to work on this. We've only done 90 episodes. Okay, let's get to a question. No one's going to listen to our show anymore. These guys never ask anything. Then shut the hell up and go. Oh, my God. Fine. Let's see. Oh, no. I got a kid texting me wanting to give away couches. If anybody would like three free couches out of a basement, let me know. All right, so this question comes to us.

This question comes to us from Salt Lake City, Utahah that'd be the home of the great salt lake are you listening i am it's all excited great i heard you the world's largest salt lake anyway so their question is this this comes to us uh from bob and janette and bob wrote the letter but it's from both of them they're both long-time listeners first-time writers all right sweet rock on and bob's question was why does it seem like uh no let me back this up uh when they when we first got in the lifestyle the sex was super hot everything about it was super hot why does it seem like now the chase is hot but the sex is just so so so so i reached out to him and because i think that's a valid question okay and so actually the thing is is that they are they're both they've been in the lifestyle about five years so they're pretty somewhat experienced they're relatively new ish at playing alone probably uh he said somewhere in the neighborhood you know 10 12 maybe maybe a little over a year year and a half max so they've been playing alone also they primarily played as a couple before okay so and um i asked them what spurred them on to start playing alone because i think that gives us a big like a huge key of like kind of what they're thinking well one obviously the typical answers we hear a lot which is it's a lot more challenging to find someone where all four people click or everybody is been there yeah where everybody is attracted and or attracted enough or interested, whatever.

And because they started to find that the sex wasn't as hot as it used to be when they first got in the lifestyle. And so they wanted to continue to spice up their experience. And I thought that was going, okay, this is awesome.

Because here's's the deal when you're first new if everybody listening right now if you have if you've had at least i don't know at least five experiences like planned experiences not necessarily like the the first one that was like a total we got caught off guard one thing led to another type thing but an actual planned experience or you were at a swingers event and you met the right people and you hooked up you know and you remember how hot everything about the process was and and that's the thing everything about the process the sex was hot the leading up to it was hot the thinking about it was hot the three days afterwards you're jacking off thinking about it the next night when you're fucking your own spouse and you guys are thinking about it you know certain smells you see the color blue you what i don't care whatever whatever was anything that you take if you ate mcdonald's and eating mcdonald's is hot whatever everything about and that's the only thing that's hot in mcdonald's everything everything about the experience was super fucking hot now if you're relatively new in the lifestyle you might still be there you might still be at that stage do not get freaked out when you hear the next thing i'm going to say okay because this is where new people are like oh fuck it will change a little bit and here's the thing it's not that it's still not just as hot or that it's not just as fun so don't panic if you're new listening don't panic but this is for those people that have been in it for a while if you've've been in it for a while, you start to find that there are certain things that even when you're brand new, if you told somebody that was going to their first swinger event, there's going to come a day when four people in a room fucking is going to be like, eh.

Or that, you know, you would just be like, or a threesome is like well yeah okay cool that's fun you would say bullshit there's no way that right until you've lived it and then it's like it's still fun the sex is still fun but it's different it's different now all of a sudden you were new in the lifestyle and you saw the couples that they weren't on the prowl they were just sitting hanging with friends and talking it was really laid back back. You're like, oh my God, they got to be bored. And now you're starting to be one of those couples. Okay.

What happens is it's not that it's not hot anymore. It's just you're used to it. It's not brand new.

It's not a total new experience than what you've ever had before right but so what you end up doing is there's other things that are actually hotter than the actual sex itself the the sex is it's really hard because feel free to jump in and say anything at any point i don't interrupt i wait for you to finish your thought the sex is always hot but sex is sex as a general rule sex either if it's shitty sex it feels bad otherwise all the other sex is good sex good or great sex it feels awesome it's whatever the case may be but the sex is sex the part that makes it so hot a lot of times is in your head.

Would you agree with that? Right. Yeah. Maybe. Well, I mean, everybody feels different, at least for a female. I don't know for a guy. For a guy, it's more either you can feel it or you can't. No, that's not true. No, everybody feels different. But overall, really, there's not. Okay, it's the whole thing of what's the difference between making love and fucking. There's not a difference. Physically, there's not a difference. It's all in your head. Okay, look, we can make love and I can still pull your hair and still put my hand on your throat and still do.

If you guys are taking notes, get out your handy-dandy notebook. These are all things she likes. And it can still be making love, but making love is in your head. The action of fucking, boinking in and of itself is very simple. Whether you're making love or fucking like a cheap whore on a Saturday night. Either way, dick goes in whole. Pause. Here we go. Because just Friday night I don't want to just have sex. I want to have swinger sex with you. Yes. Was that all in your head? Did my hips go forward and backwards? Did my dick go in and out of your pussy?

You did some things different that you hadn't done for a long time. Okay, for us, it was more aggressive. Did you like them? Yeah, I liked it. I mean, it's more aggressive. It wasn't as passionate. Okay like we make out a lot of times when we fuck. Right. Okay. And if we're making love, which that's important to me, that's a special part of our bond. When we're making love, I will caress the side of your face. I'll kiss your neck gently. I'll do some things like that.

yes but I still go in out with my dick in your pussy I still eat your pussy the same way you do okay it may be a little more aggressive it may be a little but the actual I'm talking schematics here the actual action of sex making love is not like you float and you have to do a face a different direction or some shit it's it's a lot of it is yes there's little things with it but a lot of it's in your head because you can have swinger sex and somebody gets too passionate we've had that happen where somebody went over the line. It was like, instead it became too intimate.

Well, how is sex too intimate? Because of the little things, the mindset and shit like that, right? So it's the same. Sex is sex. But what makes swinger sex so hot or strange so hot is it's not.

A pussy is a is a pussy a penis is a penis a penis is a penis or dick yes there's little variances but what makes it so hot is if i'm having sex with hot chick a okay she doesn't move the same way you do she doesn't make the same sounds that you do she doesn't she maybe doesn't um run her nails down my side get out your handy dandy notebook girls these are all things that i like uh she you know she doesn't she doesn't nibble to say she does that she smells different you know she she feels different does that make sense that's part of what makes strange so fucking hot right so i'm listening the challenge is as you do this more and more you start to find that the sex there's only so many differences in actual sex right we all know swinger sex has a script pretty much or so people think start off she sucks dick you eat pussy then you fuck her you know okay so it's got to go like in order it doesn't have to but it seems like a lot of people do and the sex part starts to become almost routine so yeah the leading up to it the leading up to it is super hot because the leading up to it is you're like every day can be a great day in your life.

But if today you go to work and tomorrow you go to Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. Right.

And then the next day you go to work, which one of those three days is probably going to be more fun disney world right so if you're leading up to an encounter and you're sexting or you're flirting or whatever and you're you're talking cutesy with each other you're talking dirty with each other it's kind of the chase it's trying to figure out what they like how to ask the question you know the whole thing oh i really like when you know guy pulls my hair i really like you know this position or that position it's it's all it's like being at disney world but when it comes to the sex part okay you have went above and beyond anything that the rides can provide at this point in time because you're taking what in in real life would be days, weeks, months of dating.

If you were dating somebody, you're cramming it into a short period of time, leading directly to, you know, the roller coaster. But what you built in your mind was an 18-story fucking roller coaster from death.

And what you got was like, like you know one at the county fair kitty right yeah a kitty right and so then the sex part is kind of like a okay and then that's why afterwards so many times people have questions about why people get ghosted afterwards because whoosh the excitement's done it's hard to recreate that excitement it's not that you are angry or don't like the person or the sex wasn't good it's just you've already been there Thank you.

excitement's done it's hard to recreate that excitement it's not that you are angry you don't like the person or the sex wasn't good it's just you've already been there there's no your imagination can come up with way sexier things than your your brain ever can or than your body ever can especially at our age you know i can still picture things in my brain that i could do. I can't really do those things anymore. I don't bend that way. But in my mind, I can talk that game. Somehow, when I read somebody texting me, I mean, if it's sexual innuendos and all that fun jazz. Wait, what? I know.

I will imagine the feel of sex. And then I get turned on like none other floodgates open and then I've hooked up with them and went, oh, okay. Yeah, because you're never going to make a look if you're if your imagination is one of like Eeyore so that everything's like, it's going to suck. Okay, you're doing it wrong. I mean, that's the whole idea. It's supposed to be like exciting and whatever. And let's face it, very few people when they're texting or texting, someone will go, hey, you know what? I'm a really good, I'm good at this stuff.

But but just so you know i'm pretty much a three pump chump you know or or hey when it's new the first time i don't ever last or you know whatever the case may be they don't put that part in and you don't imagine that part you're i mean you're not supposed to you're supposed to imagine the fun and the excitement of the whole thing so that it's hot which is one here's one of the oh i'll come back to that so you're supposed to imagine and envision it's hot so it's supposed to get you hot and bothered so that you are able to take and go from somebody that maybe you've only known maybe they were a co-worker you've known for a little while but you didn't know they were into that for less than 12 hours no i mean i'm hassling i didn't have time to think of what sex was gonna feel like no next thing you know it was break time and there we were okay no okay but that's a perfect example actually and it's to bring it back up but it is a perfect example okay so the first time that you guys hooked up, you literally hooked up at work.

Yeah. In a break room. Now, leading up to that. At lunchtime. At lunchtime. Leading up to that was hot as shit. That three hours in the course of time it took you to make that decision. It was three hours. I mean, it literally was quick. Yeah. That was hot as shit. Mm-hmm actual sex just quality of sex 1 to 10, 1's the worst 10's the best, the actual quality of the sex, take the emotion out of it, take the excitement out of it how good was the actual fucking like 4 or five because it was awkward as hell. Exactly. But the experience was still a 10.

And even though the sex itself, the actual sex in that situation kind of sucked. I mean, you're not like, hey, you know what? Let's fuck that way again. That was awkward. You wanted to get pounded. You couldn't do it. Right.

and you had to be quiet And you had to do all those things But when you guys hooked up Then actually in a hotel room Where you could actually fuck fuck How was the quality of the sex My little slut Some people had a my pony I have a my slut it's but no but so the thing was the the part of what drug it made it or not drug it but part of what made you want to go to the next experience with it was because not that the set the sex itself didn't cause you to want to hook up in the hotel room it was the hotness of the experience the potential of what the sex could be in the experience i was gonna say let's go back to what it could be because i knew that if he had potential or if we were in a bed setting that sex was going to be really really good because you're holding back in a public place but you're not holding back but the lead up to it was part of what overrides the actual if you had to if you seriously had to take the emotions out of sex your lines are small if you had to take the actual emotion out of it if you were solely based on whether or not you hooked up again on the quality of the actual sex like if it was a scientific poll so you wouldn't have done it if you had sex and it was a four rated sex with somebody a four or five in the light at a party you probably wouldn't go back but but the leading up to it the mental part with it is what but i have a rule of thumb i will get careful no i have a rule of thumb i give everybody at least two chances because the first one might not have been that great.

You do, yes. Because of either nerves or performance issues or anything like that, I give them a second chance. Yes, you do. I will give you that. You do always give people a second chance. And then after the second time? Then a different ballgame. But the point, although I'm trying to make, is that the experience itself can override the sex. Yes. Sometimes. And that's why it's okay that leading up to it's hotter. Now, one of the challenges, I think, with this is because, like these folks, they had started playing alone thinking they could find a new degree of hotness there.

Initially, there is. And there is. But it's going to be the same thing. Eventually, if you do it enough, it's going to be the same thing.

You just have to keep in mind that a lot of times, A, it's okay for sex to just be sex there are people in this lifestyle that i know that we know that really it's the chase that gets them all hot and bothered whether or not they actually end up having sex is neither here nor there right because the sex is just that it's just sex but and that's okay it's as long as everybody knows that going into it right it's one of those things obviously but you you just have to take and let the don't try to to downplay what the experience is going to be yes understand that you can take and put yourself in a situation to be disappointed i mean that is that is a very real thing with the when especially when the build-up gets bigger and bigger if you go on a dry spell and you get the build-up going for a sexual experience yeah you can be really really disappointed a little bit kind of keep that in mind but it's it's okay and it's perfectly natural i've gotten to a point where i don't envision what the feel is if you can well it's just like a party if you cannot if you cannot have predetermined expectations you're gonna have more fun okay so that's one of the things where that's what i wanted to throw in here too was because as a guy right and i like to fucking sext and i love the build up i mean it it's it's fucking it's hot it turns me on it turns you on our sex is always even more intense when one of us is in the middle of something building up which is which is awesome but i learned as a guy sometimes you get so excited so built up so ready to go that it can create performance anxiety i can see that and and then what happens is you're so ready okay we've had experience and it sucked this blue goats we were gonna hook up with this couple it was a gal that that i always kind of felt like was out of my league you know not, not, but we were new in the lifestyle, whatever.

Ten minutes before they get to the hotel, I have a hard-on that I literally could have driven through concrete. And they get there, and it was gone. Because I had been ramped up all day long. I got myself so fucking Jojo the Circus Monkey, too, that all of a sudden they got there. I got nervous and it was gone. And I wish I could say it only happened one time in the last 10 years. But it hasn't. It's happened multiple times. And I've learned for me that you cannot get all fucking jazzed up.

If you get too fucking pumped up to fuck somebody to go have that hook up then you can you can kind of mind fuck yourself because then the first thing you start thinking is you've set this high dream dreamy standard and you're like you know oh fuck what if it doesn't work and as soon as that creeps into your mind you are foobardard. You're fucked. Where are we at time-wise? I don't even know. Are we in a midway point? Oh, we're beyond. Oh, awesome. Okay. Well, we'll just skip and act like midpoint didn't even happen. You can do it. Somebody needs a clock in their studio. Anywho.

You keep saying that, but you never do it. Fuck. Okay, so another question I had, and it kind of went with this whole thing, okay, is the fact of, we always get the ones that tie in with, afterwards, why don't people stay in contact? Yeah, we've kind of answered that. We're going to spend a lot of time with that. Right. Fresh that off. It's not, it's a big deal. Try to be cool when you get done. That's really the biggest thing. Okay.

just don't communicate afterwards yeah some people don't well here's the thing remember this is this is a hobby it's sport fucking i don't give two shits anybody who says it's not sport fucking it's friendship and we want to have friends in and out of the bedroom okay great it's still sport fucking i don't care you can have friends outside the bedroom all you want but if you get a chance to nail them in the bed it's sport fucking end of story uh so wow well i mean how you really feel no it is i mean it is what it is so but the next question was does the sex get better it wasn't the next question because i was communicating was does the sex get better if you go back a second time or a third time i thought that was an interesting twist to the question because i get it so the first time you had all this build up you had sex it wasn't bad sex maybe it didn't totally lead up to your expectation sex but i mean it was a good fuck right it was good it was a good time it was kind of like you know hey that was good you know and you're ready to go like have you know go to Applebee's and get the 20 for 20 or whatever the fuck you want to do right but it wasn't like mind numbing like holy shit we can't do anything else you know does it get better your case is kind of a we can't even use your example probably not because i'm still looking forward to another hookup well okay that part we can though that part we can because okay the actual when you actually finally get to really fucking go at it the sex was great so you're excited to have it doesn't you didn't you don't need all the other build-up shit it's not just the 12 year old school girl thing that you're going through at work because he's there shit the sex was just really good and so you're excited to hook up because it was good sex okay so that part makes sense yes good sex i think if you had good sex with somebody i think that going back, it can become great sex because then you're going to experience it more for not the hype but the experience but the person or the group of people right i'd say connection but you have to be kind of gentle on that well i mean comfort it's instead of connection level comfort level you can say because here's the thing here's what's great about going back sex right you have all this leading up and every at least for me and most guys and most girls have this envision how that rendezvous is going to happen how it's going to start right okay so i had with with the gal that We used to be in a poly relationship i had it all planned out in my brain exactly how this was going to work because we had been talking about this we were going to do this whatever it was going to be awesome i was going to open the hotel room door shut the hotel door gently push her against the door start making out with her and strip her down like a fucking banana right at the door that was what the plan that this in my mind is what i had planned to do okay so now real life let's fast forward to what really happened it was super fucking cold out we were both nanoged up like motherfuckers 17 layers on we walk into the hotel room it's freezing ass cold we're both kind of nervous and unsure and so we're we're fucking with the heater to try to get the heater on which i turn the ac on we couldn't even figure out how to run the damn thing and in the process we have a couple cigarettes and then we sit and talk and then we kind of finally we're laying on the bed both clothes.

I mean, this is like 33 minutes into this. In my dream, I'd already planned it. We'd fucked 17 times at this point in time. Right. And it's like we kind of made out. And then we laughed like, well, I guess it'll probably help to get naked. Complete, total, not anything like I had planned in any way, or form at all and afterwards i said this was not how i had had it planned and we laughed about that the whole time that that she was part because anytime i would plan like that never went that way don't have a plan don't have a plan but you've talked you went it too. What you hoped would happen.

I mean, when you guys, when your current boy toy from your work. Such a dork. So nice. Nice guy. Big dick. Huge dork. Anyways. So, he looks like a young George Lucas. As Pierce. Okay, congratulations. When you see him, that's kind of shocking. But that's okay. Yeah. Just don't swallow the ring. It's a quest for the gold ring. And I'll bet he would know that reference. Oh, shut up. Because of the Lord of the Rings. Oh, my gosh. Let it go. I hassle her because it's fun. No, okay.

But even you guys had already, You'd already taken the big risk You'd fucked at work Right I mean But when you got to the hotel When you guys went to the hotel How did it start?

Talking Yep Yeah I mean and you You'd already had his dick in your mouth he'd already had his dick in you i mean it was like you would think it was like finally i'm like i'm gonna start peeling my clothes off yeah i that's the reality of it you know the first time i mean really it's always the reality of it so do i think when you go back a second time it's way more you're gonna the first thing you're gonna do when you go back the second time is laugh about the first time experience that's probably gonna be the first thing you do because let's face it you have no idea what the other person really actually likes and you kind of try to wing it and you're you know maybe you bite a nipple too hardipple too hard, maybe, you know, whatever.

There's things you do that are like, you're just trying to get the, it's like test driving a fucking car. You know, the first time you hook up with somebody, you're taking it out for the block, you don't know where all the buttons are. But when you come back the next time, you remember what made it hot, and so the next time, it's just way more relaxed.

There isn't that nervousness of like, y'all here here we are and yeah how's your family and there isn't that shit you can how's this supposed to start yeah exactly and i think that is like so yes i believe that if you go if you go back for if it was good sex okay handy dandy notebooks write this down this is the most important thing I'm going to say today. You quit saying that. It's such a children's show reference. Go on. Anyways, if you, okay, get your iPads out and get your BlackBerrys and send yourself a message. Does anybody use BlackBerry anymore? I know. I'm being a dick. Like.

Anyways, the most important thing I'm going to say is if you go back when it was good sex, good sex. Let me try this one more time. Good sex. That is so important, and here's why that's important.

If you go back and it was shitty sex, or it was it was crappy sex or it was just bad or you're trying to like ego thing to show that it can be better right that will be a fail if you did not have any fucking fun guess what if it sucked and it just didn't jive and it didn't work the second time around shit ain't gonna get magical and all of a sudden it's gonna be like oh my god this is dream sex it does not work that way i think i've had an experience or two like that you need to talk to the microphone so they can hear you too you were drinking it's okay a little lush lush no you you've given people there are exceptions on giving people a second chance right that's they need to know that because yes you give people a second chance but if it's just bad you know when we talk about our first experience where i was like fuck this we're gonna go back and i can do this it was just bad no no if there's just something something that was an absolute turnoff it was absolutely horrible you absolutely did not like it whatever going back will not make that better no that will it will only be awkward and what will happen is it will only give people send people the wrong message oh you did have a great time no actually look i actually hated every minute we were together the last time but i just thought well i'll prove myself that i can overcome this little challenge no that is a bad idea absolutely is there any time okay so let me ask you this because as a guy it's a different perspective okay well because no you don't have to explain it i'm just waiting for what you're gonna say so as a guy when you're you're we're going i'm going to jump back to talking about building up to the to the experience okay okay guys tend to we want to talk a strong game we've been trained our whole life to do that talk a good game okay make sure we talk a good game what as a woman would you give for advice to guys when they they're in that to make they're caught up in the moment of the leading up to it what to be careful of from a woman's perspective about guys talking you know a really good game and don't talk you don't have to hype yourself up well we've been trained to do that our whole lives then stop it okay well here's an idea next time you're being a bitch I'll just say well just stop it that'll definitely work right you've done that and how did that work out for me i can't say it worked out great for you but there's an understatement there's times where i stood there and went i'm being a bitch okay for those of you listening that was very few and far between times that she got all deep and reflective on that it's okay to say you're good at something would you agree with that yes it's not okay to say you're good at something.

Would you agree with that? Yes. It's not okay to say you're the best at something. It's not okay. Look, if you... I'll just kind of take it from here. It's kind of loaded questions, and I'm trying to figure out where your thought process is. No, it's not a loaded question.

How much does it suck when a guy goes, I'm going goes i'm gonna make because you're not a squirter i'm gonna eat you you're supposed to be so good i'm gonna make you squirt i'll laugh in their face right and actually what does it do for the geared up to leading up to the event yeah okay i dread them doing it i'm like because generally they suck at it they don't suck at they suck at it for you because they're so busy thinking they're so good at it They don't take the time to learn how you like it Well let's give a little background on it I'm not one that gets off massively Or often on oral Before a dildo or a vibrator I had had you train pretty damn good, and I would get off.

Yes, Mommy. Now, since a vibrator, I don't think anybody can get me off. Oh, the fuck I can't. I got you off this weekend that way. That was really horny. No, but I've learned the difference is I stop. I don't start off eating you out.

No out no you don't because i figured out that all that's going to happen when i do that is my tongue is going to go numb and i'm going to get my jaw is going to start to hurt so it's much better fuck for a little while then go down and eat you out because then you can get you a good hint is a finger also what i really what i know Are you taking notes on your Blackberry kids?

Here we go Anyways, all I'm saying is Guys Easy up on the bragging I know you get caught up in the moment We all do it But I can tell you I've heard it from my wife I've heard it from other female friends And I listen in on their conversations And I've heard it on other podcasts I've heard it from my wife, I've heard it from other female friends, and I listen in on their conversations, and I've heard it on other podcasts, I've heard it everywhere. When guys talk about how big their dicks are and how awesome of a fuck they are, usually what happens is a big fucking womp.

It's usually the exact opposite. So it's okay. What perks up your ears is when a guy says that they're kind of small. Yeah, I can believe that. You perk up your ears and you go, that's going to be good. Well, because there's something to say for a guy that will not try to... Look, your game is going to get proven when you actually hook up. So I guess my thing is just don't get too caught up in the, don't get too caught up in the moment of, of how, you know, trying to convince or sell or whatever you're leading up to. Don't get caught up in that moment so much. Let the action do the talking.

Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of things that you can talk dirty about and sex and whatever that are hot that don't involve talking about, I'm going to ram you with my 15 inchinch rock-hard cock when you don't have a 15-inch rock-hard cock. There's a lot of other things that you can say and do and still be hot and bothering and get caught in the moment. You can still have a dick that big and not know how to use it. Well, right. But the point that we're trying to get to is the point we're trying to get to, fuck it. Did tell you? I don't know what you're talking about.

The point we're trying to get to is that don't get caught up in the moment so much that you talk yourself into a corner. Right. I mean, it's kind of like hiding face pics and whatever. You're going to see each other eventually. If you actually hook up, you're going to see what you each look like. So don't, you know, enjoy the moment, enjoy the lead up, but keep it fucking real. That's like, that's like really big time. Don't talk about stamina you don't have. Agreed. You know, don't, don't do that kind of shit.

Sometimes it is okay to take in like ask questions on the other, just the regular part of, and just have a a regular conversation the more you know a person before you fuck them you'll need to sit this part out i'm kidding i'm fine with you the more you know a person before you have sex with them uh the more comfortable and when you're more comfortable the sex will be better even if it doesn't live up to all the pre hype there you go agreed okay all right kids so how much time we got left what show's over we got to go like five minutes oh my lord uh okay oh hey so since we didn't do a halftime i'll tell it now it is time to get signed up kids for crazy summer nights Crazy Summer Nights is going to be June 24th through the 26th.

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