Send us Fan MailYou want to be a swinger, You want to have hard core sex, you want to full swap, and try new things......but how do you over come the fear of rejection. It is a very real issue in all parts of the lifestyle, from kink, to poly to swinging. Finding your swagger to get that 3 sum or more sum isn t easy but we will try to help. Also we talk about the importance of safety and have control of yourself. Its all about the little things.Check out all our shows at: http://www.buzzsprout.com/181336Visit us at: http://www.krazykasbh.comfollow us on twitter @TruthKrazySubscribe to our YouTube Channel: http://www.youtube.com/kasbhSend us an email at [email protected] Support the show
Transcript
Speaker1: Hey kids, the program you're about to listen to contains some adult situations, adult language, themes, and other adult topics. If you're easily offended, this show's not for you. Hey you crazy motherfuckers, welcome back to another edition of Crazy Truth. I am the host with the most, I am Cole, and I'm here with the lovely, lovely and somewhat domesticated and slightly bitchy Miss Amanda. Hey. Seriously. I just made that up on the fly. Obviously. So we are on episode. We are on season two. Now season two is getting ready to come to a close. It is, isn't it? Dun. So we'll soon be on to season three. Now will we take a break between season two and season three? No. Fuck, no, we won't because we're not pussies. Anyway, so this is season two. I think it's episode 83. Wow. Episode 83. We're going to call this one Suck It, Bitches. No, I'm just kidding. Now we're going to be nice. Hey, guess what? You know what? Well, wait, hold on. Let me do this first. First, let's do a word from our sponsors because i'm excited for this one i love these guys uh www.sexystripperclothing.com quality exotic rave festival pole dancing clothing specializing in sexy stripper clothing footwear that can make the big clack uh dresses lingerie and more. So many items for your next lifestyle party to get naked and sexy. www.sexystripperclothing.com Don't forget, they are going to be at Crazy Winter Nights. They are super cool. Kay is going to be there. She kicks ass. She takes names. Those are your tits, Amanda. And she's going to be there. And Miss Amanda is going to be doing a dress, most likely by them, for both Saturday nights and when we go to the ASN Awards and hopefully kick everybody else's asses. There you go. Okay, so I want to start off with first, though, that's, what was I going to say? There was something I was going to say. Oh, I know what it is. Hey, so, yeah, actually, not tomorrow night, but Tuesday night, Tuesday, we're actually going to be interviewed by another podcast who wants to interview us. There you go. It'll be fun. So it's a very big honor that they got a hold of us. They want to fucking interview us, and that's awesome. And I'm going to figure out a way to show that video. We just joined the APG family. Speaker2: Adult Playground. Speaker1: They are out of the East Coast. They've got about 117,000 members. And we're one of six podcasts that they picked up. We're part of the APG family. And so we had to record a special video for it. So the other ones on there are some other. An actress I am not. Well, some of the other five videos, they're all very nice folks. Don't get me wrong. Let's just say we did our video the only way we know how. Yes. And, hey, you crazy motherfuckers, and I think I said fuck seven or eight times. We took a shot. Took a shot, yeah. How many takes do we have to do? Quite a few takes, but here's the best part. So what I figure is, when this is all said and done, the people out there are going to be forced to listen to one of our shows just because they're like, these fucking people are nuts. So they want to listen to something just to see how we are, and then they're going to be hooked. Or like in porn, they'll be like, and then we'll be good to go. For those that were not watching I was hooking my mouth you're fucking from behind okay and again for all of you that are all of you what the hell I'm from Boston let's have some chowder kids for all of you that are listening on the podcast but don't know we also do this live in front of our secret secret facebook group crazy crazy casbah shh don't tell the others uh but if you want to join it let me know and we'll get you hooked up with that so there we go what are you doing you're actually blowing your hand what what my dick's bigger than that i got people watching that need to make sure they understand that my dick is bigger than that okay that was to warm my hands up because they're cold okay this would be a great opportunity to say that because we got someone on the page that is watching it'd be a great opportunity to say i do have bigger dicks than that i'll send pictures if she wants oh yeah there we go okay or you could just say it for all the people at home too just i mean just randomly support cole's penis oh god anyways okay so uh we do have questions and but But I tell you, I'm going to start with something a little bit different here today. Seriously, you're like, oh, fuck. Okay, so this is not a funny thing in the news. It's kind of funny in the news, but it's not funny. Okay, so before, look, all the feminists, when you hear this, listen to the whole thing before you write the hate mail to me okay so this way you understand what part of this is funny what part of it's not so uh unless you've been absolutely living under a fucking rock the last week and so ow that hurts there patrick off of spongebob uh you you all saw the clip where the kind of sexy reporter is doing like a stand-up, you know, not stand-up like comedy, but stand-up doing a report outside like a turkey run or some shit. Some sort of marathon, half marathon thing. Okay. Right? Okay. And so the camera's live and she's live. So all these fucking jackasses, all these people are running. Runners are running. There's people that are running because they're in it to run. And then there's's all these fucking morons coming behind jumping as they're running to be in the camera and waving and floundering around right okay good enough whatever if you ask my my youngest son every time the camera's on me at the nebrass game apparently i was doing the same thing anyways totally unrelated so one gomer as he's running by This fucking jack wagon slaps her on the ass, okay? Pops her on the ass, and she stops. She fucking pissed. So this is on camera. You can tell who it is. By the way, he came in with the swinging shit. And apparently he didn't just slap. He slapped and squeezed, okay? So she was fucking pissed. So right after the incident is over she files charges she files sexual assault charges right so but she hadn't decided oh she it was reported she hadn't decided she was going to file charges yet or not okay that part's not funny okay so she went on the national circuit and did the whole the whole thing about you know violating a woman and how it took her power and took a cheap shot and a lot of the the very uh you know scarred scarred and traumatic sort of things how you feel about that's neither here nor there we all know in the lifestyle unwanted touch it touching is not good okay and no one is supposed to be a piece of meat whatever but she has successfully demolished this dude okay because before she even hit the news it came out they were able to identify the guy okay and and they he's on the news and it comes to find out this dude is a youth pastor okay he's an older guy he's a youth pastor he goes on public television he goes on all the news things at the same time she's going off about her whole thing and he's going you know hey i made an error in judgment i didn't mean to do that i shouldn't have done that that was wrong you're you're an asset to the community and a wonderful person i was wrong okay which okay so he's an idiot too i mean you don't accidentally at no point in time do you accidentally slap a girl's ass i accidentally put my penis in her mouth surprise i was just as shocked as you were he was running what he thought would even cause your mind to smack her ass he goes i wanted to get on tv and I wanted to get on TV. And at first she was like, well, I didn't mean to. I kind of came in. I misgauged it. Yeah, you went to pat her on the back. Pat her and grab her back. Shut up, dude. He's an idiot. Okay. So, but here's the thing. She's went ahead now and decided she's pressing charges. Okay. So, regardless of your opinion on that, okay, my thing is this. I'm going to show you a little bit. charges okay so regardless of your opinion on that okay my thing is this she's already successful well no she is following up he has already successfully ruined his fucking life well he's a youth minister no he ruined yeah yeah that's what he said he has successfully ruined his life he has done it himself he was on the news acting like a moron like he was Thank you. youth minister no he ruined yeah yeah that's what he said he has successfully ruined his life he has done it himself he was on the news acting like a moron like he was some kid touching a woman woman he shouldn't have okay the funny part is what an idiot this guy is that's why i'm laughing because this is really fucking funny now do i necessarily believe that anybody is scarred from life from one slap on the ass no no but it still doesn't make it right no person should be touched so they want to be touched but him being a dumbass is funny so his career is shot right he's a youth minister that's gonna look great on the resume it's all over the country and all over the world this thing's went viral so it's not like some other church is gonna you know other church can go well you know we we forgive you you know come come grab our members asses uh so his career is fucked if he's
Speaker3:
Thank you. You know, come grab our members' asses.
Speaker1:
So his career is fucked. If he's a youth minister and very involved in church, I'll bet he's losing a shit ton of friends because all of his Christian friends that he probably has, whatever, might not be quite as forgiving.
Speaker2:
He didn't really resist from adultery.
Speaker1:
Yeah, he didn't resist temptation. Plus, his marriage could very well be over because she's young and hot there was no there was no accidental ass slapping there so now the reason what the reason i bring this up the reason this whole thing ties in with why i would have this on the show besides to laugh at the fucking moron you know if you're there to run you're already doing a stupid enough activity as is yeah i'll say it i i've done my half marathon God,'m never doing again no runners are awesome i'm just making fun because i can't do them anymore because i'm old fat but you're you're there to run you're not there to be on the tv and you're not 12 okay but the last thing i think when running because i've done three k's i've done half marathons like four of them. The last thing that crossed my mind is paying attention to anybody that's standing on the side doing a news report or even cheering for that matter. And I'm definitely not thinking about smacking somebody's ass when I'm, like, dying on the side. Again, you like me to get a picture when you get done with your meddling stuff. But you don't want a lot of pictures taken anyway. You don't want to be news when you're running that first one that you took a picture of yeah but i mean you wouldn't want to be on the news your conscience of your parents okay but here's here's the extra reason why i'm tying this all together is this i think is important an important lesson for the lifestyle okay because here's the thing we all know in the lifestyle about consent. Right. And half the time that gets fucked up. Anyways, that's why we always have to talk about.
Speaker3:
Don't touch.
Speaker1:
If it ain't your junk, keep your hands off of it without permission.
Speaker3:
Right.
Speaker1:
So we have enough problem with that. But here's the deal. And I've seen this happen before. People, everybody needs to remember being drunk. I being stupid in this guy's case or being fucking out of his head because he was tired from running whatever there is staff at these things okay and i have seen where staff gets groped or or the attempt to you know here's the deal not everybody is a swinger okay so eventually this is going to be more in the lifestyle where somebody's going to be at a swinger event and touch another swinger just like that, not like sexual, like insert fingers or insert anything, and somebody's going to call the cops at some point in time. But think about this. If you do that at staff, you've had too much to drink, and you mistake, you know, you and a staff member are about the same height, and you're both wearing a similar outfit. You know, you're both wearing black pants, I'm drunk drunk and you up and accidentally slap the staff member's ass instead of your wife's ass that that could be now you think it's bad for a youth minister and all that shit how do you want to come out to on the news when it's your family and friends and everybody find out not only are you an ass grabber but you're a dirty swinger on top of it now i was at a concert with a fellow lifestyle lifestyle friendly she's kind of in and out um we're standing there waiting for the concert to start and here's a group of people off to the side not not more than 10 feet away because we're the vip sitting seating which was you need to be hotter ahead. I do. So I know I need to be hotter. Really? Jackass. But this guy had walked up, and this girl had her back to him, talking to another person. And he walks up, and he grabs, but he doesn't just grab. He digs in between her legs it's pussy she jumps she turns around quickly the boyfriend is about to punch him in the face and he goes oh my god i thought you were somebody else and died right i mean he's just like oh my god please forgive me and he's like apologizing left and right it ended up being an okay situation you know he was like if you, if you want to hit me, go ahead and hit me.
Speaker2:
I deserve it. I didn't mean to do that. I totally thought it was somebody else. And then it was all cool. And he was apologizing to the boyfriend, apologizing to the girl, all over the place.
Speaker1:
And then she liked it.
Speaker2:
You don't know who you're coming up behind.
Speaker1:
No, and that's just it. I mean, the thing is, you're going to be in an event. Somebody's going to do this in an event. And look, at hotel takeovers, there's vanillas, at bars, whatever. It's not okay to do it to another lifestyle person, but it's sure as fuck not okay to do it to a staff member. And here's the deal. They're not under any obligation not to call the police. Right. So I just, I wonder what that I thought. This is a great cautionary tale for people in the lifestyle you know and being drunk's not going to be an excuse well in fact it's going to be a judge worse on you because you're at a sex thing where the security guy had a kiss planted on him last year and he was just like um okay very lifestyle friendly knows all about it doesn't really matter right but it caught him off guard he's like all right Yeah, very lifestyle friendly, knows all about it. It doesn't really matter. Right. But it caught him off guard. He's like, oh, right. And they were they were our security is prepared for that kind of stuff to happen. But if it's just a random like a security company or just a cop or just a hotel security again, that shit. I mean, it seems silly, but we forget in the lifestyle. Not everybody is there. And And the Me Too movements and some of the other, you know, and just the common decency movements are taking hold. I talked to somebody today that is looking at possibly coming to Crazy Winter Nights. This would be their very first event. They're very, very nervous. That's why we preach consent in the lifestyle because people people need to be comfortable and you you need to have permission to touch somebody else but i just thought it was funny because it was just like here's this real life thing going this dude's shit is fucked forever because of being a moron think about if you added to the mix swinger think about swinger going out to everybody all the way through and all the people you tried to hide it from so i just thought i'm like you know what we're going to talk about that on the show because well it's a very real world that we live in so i don't know i still think it's funny that he's an idiot phlegm yummy what are you doing i'm tangled up in cords normally we put that on video when she's planning cords like that just saying okay how are we doing on time i need to know where i'm at what's going on you're only 15 minutes in perfect we got all kinds of time okay so uh the question today and this is awesome okay so the uh well actually i'm gonna i want to do this question in the second half that's what i wanted i want to do the question in the second i want to talk about something this isn't a question kids this is it's kind of a question it's something again because we have our secret facebook page and with on all of our pages, we're about 5,200 members strong. So we get situations come up all the time, okay? And so, which makes for great, great stuff to review for people. So it was last week, actually, had a situation came up where just the short version of it is there was a lot of red flags that got raised in the situation. And there was a lot of red flags that got raised in the situation. The whole concept was people were, you know, one person was saying they were going to do a service, in this case photography, and the other person was, okay, that'd be great, and set up to do a meet. And what ended up happening was the situation got weird okay that's but it made me think of the overall thing that that we deal with i think we have to talk about red flags in the lifestyle okay okay because most time look a lot of this stuff is for new people i know a lot of people listen to our show and go i've been swinging forever i already fucking knew that right but there's a whole lot of people that are new that don't know and so here's the thing with this section guys and gals and kids listen to this one to make sure a you're not throwing up red flags that you don't even know you're throwing up or b that you're actually paying attention for red flags okay here's the deal this is not a problem that's regulated just to single guys. That's the easiest target that we pick on. Single males, they're all fucking creepers. Okay. No, this is not a problem that's regulated to single guys. It's not a problem that's regulated to singles at all. Single guys, single females. It's couples. It's all of the above. Okay? Right. So the reality is you have to start to be, we've talked about this before, you have a part of your responsibility in this lifestyle, which is personal self-control and self-knowledge. Okay, so you need to know what the fuck's going on at all times, right? You need to learn to trust your gut. You have to learn to trust your gut look and what happens is no matter how much we all every single person that throws parties owns clubs runs pages whatever we all want to eliminate the dirt fucks and the dirt bags out of the lifestyle if it was a perfect world we would have none of that that shit right there is no way to eliminate them no the only way to have time to eliminate them is to find them when they do something stupid and then react accordingly okay but you as the individual you have to if something seems off if if something seems strange, if something seems, you know, quirky, I just like saying quirky, quirky, don't do it. Right. Okay. I keep going to news stories on this one, but it works. Here in our town that we lived in, there was a couple of athletes that got removed from the team which is good anyways they uh they ended up raping a gal supposedly they're accused of raping a couple a couple of women one of the women they found off like a like a tinder or some shit like that some dating website sent her mother text before she went saying she wasn't comfortable going over there. But she turned around and did it anyways. Okay? Look, in the lifestyle, trust your gut. Trust your gut. It doesn't, maybe you're way off. Maybe the person is innocent and is wonderful and everything would have been great. If everything would have been great anyways, down the road it will happen and it will be wonderful. But, oh people trust your gut have some common fucking sense you have to have your head out your ass ladies and guys this goes for both if it couples marriage doesn't matter if you're gonna go play alone with somebody okay you're gonna go meet somebody and maybe your relationship is one of the dates or whatever the case may be, I don't know, whatever. Let somebody know where you're going to be. Tell somebody, tell a friend, tell somebody, tell somebody what time you're going to be home. Tell somebody roughly or somebody you can check in with. Okay, don't think, man, that only fucking girls can get, you know, bad shit happen to them. Let somebody know where you're supposed to be or what's going on it gives yourself a little bit of level of of safety there's a net there don't go somewhere that if you even if it's just some weird feeling that you think it could just be you know maybe i just have a cold and that's fucking with my head i don't care if all of a sudden something tells you don't do it Don't do it The reason your gut doesn't lie It's actually your body sensing things
Speaker2:
It's intuition
Speaker1:
And for the love of Christ I probably shouldn't have told you I don't know how many of you guys watch Sesame Street But if you didn't go ahead and tune that fucking shit in This is that whole thing If I play ball in the house It'll hit the vase The vase will fall The vase will break The baby will cry Mother will be mad Here we go.
Speaker2:
Here we go.
Speaker1:
Here we go.
Speaker2:
Here we go.
Speaker1:
Here we go. Here we go.
Speaker2:
Here we go.
Speaker1:
Here we go. thing if i play ball in the house it'll hit the vase the vase will fall the vase will break the baby will cry mother will be mad okay the moral of that whole story is don't fucking play ball in the house you know look at the whole overall consequences right don't repeat the action so if the first time you meet with somebody it's just fucking creeped out And weird as fuck Don't set up to do it again Don't set up to do it again I mean We're talking about a situation where Like As soon as we heard the situation We're like Well that's fucked up I mean it wasn't even It was a no braininer so you can't put yourself don't turn around and go don't go well it's probably sorry i'm just off on that no a dude supposed to come take pictures of you shows up hours upon hours late with no camera equipment look let me help you out with this a professional photographer if their equipment breaks will call you and cancel that part of it because they will be pissed off because that's how they make their money and their living okay so don't turn around and set something up and put yourself right and at that point in time and they were two hours late and they were two hours late and at that point in time with that event they had their significant other you can't reschedule later with nobody i mean that was just now are we saying that this guy was for sure going to do something bad no but is there a whole lot of red fucking flags there there is and you have to remember especially new people especially even seasoned people when you're starting to play alone you have to start and think about these sorts of things let's do the personal story we had an incident when we first started playing alone right where where no no no don't say No right where where no no no don't say no because no now communication is fucking communication is key here how you communicate this to your spouse or your similar is very very important yes okay because if you communicate it wrong what happens is we're long-time swingers we're long-time partners we're long-time married so when you communicate it wrong then all you're doing is fucking sound like a huge dick okay which i sound like a huge dick so let let's preface the story with cole sucks okay okay no but the but the first time that one of the times we were swinging alone there was there there was where you guys were going to meet was was at a resident versus a hotel there wasn't a general location type thing did i know the person yeah but briefly not as well obviously as you did i didn't want a fucking nice guy but i instigated it yeah you instigated i said do you want to play yeah and but the thing was was the the instantly the hackles on my head neck raised for the fear because i'm a husband first right so i'm like well yeah but and i presented it totally wrong because i presented like well what the fuck are you thinking and that's how i present it don't do that let me re-emphasize for everybody listening present in the form of a question alex do it a little bit better than that what is i love you uh don't don't fucking start demanding but ultimately when we got through the part of me being a dick which was a big part of it but when we got through that part in hindsight we were able to communicate and you could see where some of my concerns came from because we haven't dated for that point in time for 26 years and you forget that kind of stuff now did anything bad happen no great guy everything's wonderful it's all good but when you don't date for a long time you forget what's out there or what could be out there right and i know we're being somewhat vague on that but i mean the bottom line is we hadn't talked over what we didn't have rules in place again it was a learning curve we didn't have rules in place of where we could or couldn't play with people individually we didn't have any of that set up so we had some communication shit we needed to work on right and then in turn because when you love someone the fear factor goes up so how you present becomes a real issue but in this day and age you have to be smart about that shit so even though even if you're an experienced swinger if you're doing something new don't think you're too fucking smart to fuck it up okay because i think a lot of experienced swingers do i think i think newbies you're way more paranoid about fucking shit up anyways so you're gonna probably be more careful and like if you start playing alone or something than an experienced couple is you want to add anything no i agree i this one isn't as fun of a topic to talk about but it's but it it's true this is the time of year that this kind of stuff it it happens here here's my thought on the on the original person okay when a guy wants to take your pictures i instantly get a red flag. What's behind it? What do you want? Okay. If it's innocent and it's just going to be just pictures and no sex involved, I would take somebody with me. Absolutely. If they were two hours late, I wouldn't have waited around two hours to wait for him to show up. No. Even if he i'm coming you know wife has to get ready or whatever i'd be like i'm gone i'm not waiting here anymore right right which which if they're legit they'll have no problem with you a not waiting in two hours and b they'll have zero problem with you bringing somebody photographers are a good one to hit on about this because that's an easy thing that people use to to use to use people a lot in this lifestyle fucking a lot how many do we know they're like want to tie you up to take pictures so everybody everybody wants to pictures oh we want to use it for artistic thing no they don't they want it for their spank bank let's keep it real well not all of them some you know i this is this is really going to be sexist but down the rabbit hole we go being that i used to be a photographer women would feel more comfortable around you as a woman to undress to be a little bit more provocative for their boyfriend, husband, whatever.
Speaker3:
Yes.
Speaker2:
And you eased them into it so they weren't nervous.
Speaker1:
But you weren't dressed.
Speaker2:
Vanillas, of course, one wasn't, but vanillas.
Speaker1:
But you weren't trying to sleep with them.
Speaker2:
But I wasn't trying to sleep with them. And at that point in time, I wasn't bi either, at least that I knew about.
Speaker3:
Surprise.
Speaker2:
But I personally would feel more comfortable meeting a woman to take pictures than I would a man.
Speaker3:
Yes. And, flirt, hit, hit want to fuck and then all of a sudden you're gonna change gears and go well you know could you come over just so we can just do pictures let's just say she's totally lost her fucking mind and she falls for that shit i'm not going to now i don't care if she wants to fuck you great and you want to take pictures and have a camera in the way while you're doing i don't really care that's up to you guys but i'm just saying i think that that's something that people use that as a that is a great way to get somebody naked and then have stuff magically happen and that shit i'm sorry you have to be you have to be conscious of we hate to say that there's people that will take advantage of lifestyle there are photographers that will take advantage and take pictures and you'll never see them again just so they can use them for their portfolios because they found somebody they could tie up or do whatever with there are people that are legit that just want to take pictures for the artistic beauty of it rock on there there's all these different things but again we're not just bagging on photographers so before I get a bunch of hate mail for that shit but again we're just red flags just because we're a community and hopefully we're a tight community and that's awesome you still have to have your fucking you still have to have your ducks in a, man, you know, it's like I've got squirrels in there at a rave. But you still have to have your head out of your ass when this shit goes on. Or otherwise, you can be fucked. And good way, bad way, it's hard to tell. On our secret page, Denise has a great thing. Always ask for a portfolio and references for a photographer. Absolutely. Yeah, well, and it's not just even just that. Have a clear cut idea of what's going on. That's that communication thing. Have the communication. Look, if it's something that you're both okay with, that it could lead to sex, you're both adults, and if that's one you both want, then that can be hot as hell. And I get it. Rock on. But like anything, it's like we talk about like kink.
Speaker1:
It's not a kink if one person doesn't have the option whether or not they want to participate. Okay, so you just want to be sure. What we want to make sure that people understand is when you're out here doing these things and these events and these activities and you're meeting people and everything else, oh my God, you have to, you can't, if something happens, you can't Oh, my God. You have to. You can't. If something happens, you can't go. Well, I didn't know. I was just caught off guard. Well, you shouldn't have been. OK, this is just like real life. You it is real life. You know, you shouldn't be caught off guard. You can't let a lot of sweet talking and a lot of schmoozing and whatever cause you to do something you don't want to do or to put yourself in a stupid position that's the biggest that's that's the biggest the biggest thing that that you know we want to do so well the thing is is that you know if your intuition is telling you all of a sudden you're not feeling good all of a sudden you're extremely nervous about even going or dread everybody's gonna have nervousness meeting somebody for the first time absolutely but if there's dread in it or you're like really going oh my gosh i really don't want to go that is your body and your mind telling you and your gut telling don't go. Call and fucking cancel. If anything, reschedule. Yep. It could be your intuition preventing you from getting in a car accident on the way. You don't know. Look, if someone is really interested, they'll understand. And if they don't understand, then you don't want to hook up with them anyways. So there you go. So these are all like all like our safety tips there we go the safety dance you can you can dance if you want to all right that's halftime can i leave my friends behind you can or you can fuck your friends what what wait all right uh okay so we're gonna take a quick break we're gonna be right back stay with the show are you ready to go to the biggest party of the year in 2020 Are you ready for 2019 to be done and kick 2020 off with a bang? Here is your chance. Crazy winter nights. 8,000 square foot dungeons. World class panelists and educators. Leather and lace party. Formal party. Rave. Giant vendor fair and so much more. Speed meet and greets there's more get your tickets today www.crazywinternights.com january 17th through the 19th in omaha nebraska this is a true hotel takeover be there or be square we can't wait to see you at Crazy Winter Nights. www.crazywinternights.com And we're back and Amanda's jumping around like a fucking spider monkey on crack. Kind of about the same size. As a spider monkey? Yeah, I'm a little bit bigger than a spider monkey. Alright, well we'll see how that goes out in a little bit. Okay. So now we have another question. This makes me feel good, by the way. This is pretty exciting. This is from a new gal. She's on our page. She just recently found us. And I'm going to read her comment first. I've listened to all of your podcasts in less than five days. So she powered through. She's been doing a lot of traveling for of traveling work something and power through and listen to all two years 200 or all 82 episodes wow in five days she rocks uh absolutely so with that being said how does one get over the fear of rejection that just happened to a friend of mine and i'm'm like, okay, all right, that's pretty, okay, so, let's, you want to start?
Speaker3:
No. No?
Speaker1:
You fucking bitch.
Speaker2:
No, you have to start on this one, because I'm pretty bad with it, actually.
Speaker1:
Well, and I didn't, you know, I told her that I decided she's a listener, and I'm glad she asked that question, because I think it's a great question. So, there's a couple of different types of fears of rejection that you can deal with with this. Number one, there's the normal before you even talk to anybody fear of rejection or it can be you have new fear of rejection because of a previous rejection, right? And that is going to make a little bit of difference okay here's my thing a great way to start off when you want when you're sitting there and you're you're looking at getting into lifestyle and you have that fear of people aren't going to be into me or whatever okay and this again i'm kidding this is not just a woman issue although it seems to be awfully womanish in some ways miss amanda now every single person understand the first thing you have to understand when you get in lifestyle is everybody has the exact same fears when they start the exact same fears okay so actually we need to back up even further and god God said, let there be light. And there was light.
Speaker3:
No.
Speaker1:
So, first we have to start off with, why are you getting into the lifestyle?
Speaker3:
Okay? Okay.
Speaker1:
This is a very key component right here. If you're getting in the lifestyle to improve your self-esteem, to feel better about yourself, that is not the right reason to get in the lifestyle. lifestyle it once you get in the lifestyle those things will happen okay but you need you can't go in you can't go into the lifestyle looking to find uh redemption you can't go into the lifestyle looking to find you know that missing missing that missing piece of the personal puzzle for self-esteem. It won't work that way because what's going to happen is you're going to run into somebody that's not interested in you. You're going to run into a dude who can't get it up. You're going to run into a girl that is just dry and it doesn't work. You're going to run into that. Okay so if you put all that that into that basket that that search for that holy grail to make you whole lifestyle is not an option for you okay you will you will get a lot of those things out of it your self-esteem will grow in the lifestyle okay so that's step one why are you going into it number two, before you set foot in a swingers club or anything else, if you're afraid of, there will be nobody that likes me, go to your favorite porn channel, mine's Pornhub, just saying, and start cruising the categories. God's honest truth, I totally believe this completely start looking at porn okay what i'm not just to jack off and get off porn but start looking at all of the categories in in in porn okay because here's the deal you're going to find people that like uh large people that like midgets people that like average people that want huge dicks, little dicks, medium sized dicks, people that want to have fucking tire iron shoved up their cooters or one in their ass. You're going to find people that want, you know, threesomes, foursomes, fivesomes, orgies, gang bangs, uh, butt cake. You're going to find, uh, people that want, uh, you know, that love to be coded income and some that don't want it anywhere close to them you're going to find people that want, you know, that love to be coded income and some that don't want it anywhere close to them. You're going to find people that are into pregnancy sex. You're going to find people that are into hardcore rough sex. You're going to find people that are into the family stepdad, stepdaughter sex.
Speaker2:
I was going to say stepbrother.
Speaker1:
Yeah, you're going to find there's a whole category of two dads swap their daughters. There's really one on tire irons? I haven't thought of tire irons. But I'm sure there is. And that doesn't even go into the kink thing. So here's the thing. It's like the dating site, you know, Christian Mingle, FarmersOnly.com. Look, there's the same type of concept with sex. There really is. There is something for everybody, okay? With that being said, I don't think there's anybody. Look, you could probably be half fish, half koala bear, and maybe, you know, one rabbit here. And there's probably one out there, somebody's going, that is exactly what I'm looking for. Okay, there's somebody for everybody. But with that being said, you also have to understand, when you look at everybody in your life, before you ever step foot in anything with swinging, look at all of your friends, look at all of your family, okay, look at everybody you know, and look at their significant others. Are they the no why are they not the same because everybody likes something a little bit different so understand that it's not you it's nothing against you if someone's not that you're not their type okay we have this discussion all the time one thing i like i like to fuck taller girls in the lifestyle why is your role in this man no i'm laughing because you've been with somebody under five feet tall for how long yeah 27 years and you know what midget elf sex fucking kicks ass last night we fucked like rabbits you didn't have your own fears on and that's awesome but we swing because we like something different right like you want a guy that's in shape i get it i've never said that no but i mean so the thing is is okay so you can't you have to look at it and you have to go in with a realistic thought process with that okay the other thing you have to remember with this is that with that initial that initial shyness go into a event with zero expectations i think that what happens i know what happens for guys you got to speak for women but for guys you go in with this high expectation and then it's not smooth and it's not you know you don't you don't have somebody it's just obvious that they want to let you talk to them and all of a sudden you're afraid of going up and talk to them rejected you instantly go back to uh ninth grade year in high school when you ask the other freshman girl that you were a freshman who was in with all the seniors and she laughed in your face okay and that's now a really good friend of mine but she denies it but it's true okay so you you instantly go in that mode as a guy because you went with these expectations that you were going to be able to pick up another couple and fuck okay is it the same way for women i mean is that the the with expectations they become unmeetable well you're hoping that some guy will make the move and come up and talk
Speaker3:
to you
Speaker2:
because you know
Speaker1:
I was once newly on my own and moved a thousand miles away from home and had the guts to go up to a guy i worked with and said hey do you want to go out yeah and he shot my ass down and i never instigated another conversation with a guy after that. You didn't. Yes, you did. Yes, you did. Oh. With me. No, I did not. No, you didn't, did you? Oh, you're just coming to the dance for the free snacks, aren't you? Some people do like to dance. You instigated sex later that night. Yes, I did, because I started waiting. But, okay, so so there you can see it's still the we you have to know and understand that everybody has that same fear okay you have to a lot of shit in swinging you have to look at rationally i mean i know that's easier said than done look we've been in this almost a decade and it's still nervous to go up and talk to new people you i'm gonna okay everybody listening do you want to know how you can tell when cole's nervous this will be funny as shit when cole's nervous just watch how many jokes i start telling the the more fucking nervous i am the more jokes i'll start to tell no i don't think that's necessarily true i well i will i will crack it on how many drinks you've had right but i i hide it a little bit more but i mean you know i mean we're still afraid there's still that nervousness but you have to you just have to know that it's okay it's okay to feel nervous it's okay you know and it's something you just if you go in with zero expectations you're going to come out uh having having fun uh so Nancy Woods I'm old school someone is interested they can they can ask me that and and that's for ladies that is a lot of it but understand a lot of guys we can all think back we get a little fucking gun shy because that's the other type of fucking nervousness that we have to deal with is once you've been shot down, just like what, what did you like? You just said, you went up, you asked guy, he shot you down and you're like, that was it. And as, as a couple, I mean, this is what you can, you have to go back and consider the source. You have to consider the overall big picture, okay? Was it that, look, no guy is going to admit that they're having issues that day. A lot of times they'll hide behind them, they're not interested, okay? But whatever, let's just say somebody is legitimately not interested. I would much rather have somebody, even though it might burn a little bit, it might sting, to have somebody go, hey, you know, I'm just really not interested. Thank you. legitimately not interested i would much rather have somebody even though it might burn a little bit it might sting to have somebody go hey you know i'm just really not interested that sucks but that's a hell of a lot better than leading it on for months and you thinking you have a snowball's chance in hell and hearing it through the grave pond you totally don't agree with that well no one's going to say that to you but they will to me whatever um i'm the type of person that um where was i going with that thought shit i hate it when that happens it's called getting old choo choo i don't want to hurt anybody's feelings right and so i'm nice now when i have a feeling that somebody's just being nice and they don't want to hook up and they keep just putting it off then i'm done yes yeah well yeah you you're you're in that to me it tells me that you're really not interested I'm not going to. Right, you get in tune with it. You get in tune with it, which is good. And no, we don't want to hurt people's feelings, but. Because I don't want to shoot somebody down and have them go through the same feeling I did when your heart just goes and sinks way down. Well, but that's the other part that goes with this, too. That right there is a key phrase. And that's part of it that i think happens more and more in the new age of swinging than it used to heart that way no but a lot of people do because a lot of that with this dating and this kind of this crap that people do look if you're just moving to fuck right and yeah it it will not hurt your feelings when you hit on this cup all night, you're drinking with them, and it's time to close the deal and the deal doesn't close. It's more like, fuck. All right, fine. When there's no emotion to it, it's just sex. There's no emotion to it. That will not hurt you. Well, just ask a guy to go out 30 years ago i don't remember exactly what the feeling but that wasn't any heart involved but no but that was you can't compare that to this if you'd walked in and said hey here's the deal you want to go fuck he'd been like shit yeah we met as a one-night stand you gonna tell me that i was looking for necessarily to find somebody to be my soulmate for the rest of my life you just ran into a louisville slugger that fucked you out of the park and you're like well, I guess we can figure out how to make this work.
Speaker3:
No.
Speaker1:
Okay, that happens though but no but I'm just saying you can't compare 30 years ago when you were single and trying to find something and you were you were looking for a boyfriend you were just like I was looking for a girlfriend and when we met we were looking for a boyfriend and girlfriend situation we maybe not didn't know it but that's what we were looking for because we were unmarried and we were trying to find that's what people are doing they're searching for something what we're searching for in lifestyle is pussy and dick and some combination maybe it's pussy pussy dick or dick dick pussy or dick dick pussy dick mouth i don't know but there's some combination that we're looking for we're not you're not supposed to be looking for love or anything deeper than that and and that's the challenge i'm not ripping but i mean that's the challenge is that you know what if you walk up to somebody that that i have talked to for five hours i've been i've've been interacting them with five hours. I've been working it right. Playing the game. We're doing drinks. I'm being funny. Doing light texting with permission and fucking, you know, we're kind of schmoozing and we're whatever. And then it comes to close the show. And at the end of that, I'm like, OK, hey, you know, I'm really kind of feeling this. You want to go back through and let's fucking get it on? And she goes, you know, I just am not feeling it tonight.
Speaker3:
Okay.
Speaker1:
The only way I should feel, the only fucking way that I have any right to feel in the lifestyle is bummed. I'll say it. I'll say you should not feel any other way than fucking bummed. If you feel anything other than bummed, you're doing it wrong. Because, I mean, here's the deal.
Speaker3:
I don't know. i'll say it i'll say you should not feel any other way than fucking bummed if you feel anything other than bummed you're doing it wrong because i mean here's the deal there's no other attachment with it i get what women go through when a guy can't get it up i understand that because that's that's you're at a different level that's a different thing then you know what i mean made it to that level you've made yeah you've leveled up and donkey kong can't fucking follow through that's You know, that's a different thing then you know what i mean made it to that level you've made yeah you're you've leveled up and donkey kong can't fucking follow through that's you know that's a different ballgame i understand that but at that point in time and it's it's not that you mean to i mean it's not a bad thing i'm not ripping on people for feeling that way i get it what i'm trying to do is i want to help people to understand though you need to have i just choked on a dick no you need to have you need to have an understanding of how you should feel because you're not searching for that anymore you know you're you're not you're not you're literally even if you're single no now it's what's wrong with me right but the and but that's the problem with the whole thing is that no it's not it is it's no different than like it's like buying a scratch off lottery ticket okay because you we buy lottery tickets right we play the lottery and we always have what we do when we hit the lottery right right okay so it'd be like buying a lottery ticket and we don't win and then just being like our life is over and fucking i mean seriously it's a ticket it's one chance it's nothing more than a long shot okay there is nothing deeper than what you're doing than looking for a form of sport fucking. It is what it is. And the thing is, that's the challenge.
Speaker1:
Now, how do you get to that point?
Speaker3:
You're going to have the feeling of the punch in the gut. You're going to have it. There's no way around it, especially when you're new.
Speaker1:
When you're new in this, you're going to have that feeling. But you have to seriously look at it. Maybe takes a day or two first couple times you know but re-look at it and really think it through because once once you get out of that situation you really think it through well then all of a sudden it's like you can see it for what it is i know in the modern day of of lifestyle where we all all talk about nobody bed notches bed notches are bad you know that's quality versus quantity blah it's still fucking sport fucking that is the whole thing if you're a single okay if you play with a couple you need to understand this it is sport fucking okay if it turns anything into I'll see you next time. okay if you play with a couple you need to understand this it is sport fucking okay if it turns anything into other than sport fucking then it becomes a different game called home wrecking okay so and and we don't want to play that game okay let's turn to poly right but at that point in time that's a whole different you're you started it you're still look you have to know where your starting point is what wherever it grows to it grows to right that's one thing so singles if you're doing if you're meeting each other okay now maybe that's gonna be a little different ball game because you're both single okay so that can fall more into that that dating concept yeah that then maybe i can understand it's not so much sport fucking but if you're a couple with couple or you're a couple and you're playing alone whatever the case may be with that part of it if there's a couple somewhere in the mix of that understand it is sport fucking it doesn't make you a whore it doesn't make you a slut it doesn't make you a bad notcher what it is you fucking real. Okay, because if you came in this lifestyle to find, if you're like looking for the 50 ways to leave a lover, you know, and you came in this to find a way to ditch your old lady or ditch your old man, okay, you're doing it wrong. So you came into this as to do it as like a hobby. We talk about it all the time. Some people golf. Some people fuck other people's spouses. Everybody has their own hobby. Both involve drinking. Both are wonderful options. I don't know. a hobby we talk about all the time some people golf some people fuck other people's spouses everybody has their own hobby both involve drinking both are wonderful options so the thing is is that you have to keep it in mind for what it is if you take it too far than that's where a lot of new swingers and old swingers have issues right because the old way It wasn't as much of the dating and the going out and all the non-sexual activities leading up to it is one way right one way wrong no not at all it's your lifestyle you should all do it however you want to do it but you still have to understand you have to have a certain thought process that goes with this and you can't let it consume that much if it's starting to consume that much whether you're in a couple or you're individual i would seriously say you might think about taking a break or going back to kind of regrouping again it's not that you're doing anything wrong but you just want to make sure that you want to make sure your head's in the right place with this kind of stuff because when your head goes meandering on its own somewhere uh bad things can happen like really really fucking quick you've been so fucking quiet this whole episode i feel like i should squirt you with a water gun i'd kick your ass well you have, you have. You'd be like, mm-hmm. Ma-na, ma-na. I'm just like, well, seriously, you're just kind of like quiet. Are you just like letting me totally rant? You're like, let him get all the hate mail. He's a dumbass. No, I just let you talk. My brain wanders here and there. Well, what did it wander to? Well, a year ago, we were doing our podcast with Me Hammered. We were. You were drunker and shit after your Christmas party. Because we had an office party. Uh-huh. Yep. Or my work party, whatever. And I proceeded to get hammered. Yep. Got hit on by a girl. Yep. Didn't know it. Yep. Fumbled on the play. Dumbass. Yep. So I was prepared this time to be hit on. And it didn't happen. I got tipsy. It wasn't that bad. We still didn't win a fucking TV. No, we still didn't. But a lesbian that I work with, I blatantly said, well, my nipples are pierced. And the look on her face was, what? Yeah, no doubt. That was impressive. She was told that I was bisexual when she was drunk. And I just don't think she remembers it. She was told when you were sober also, or when she was sober also at work, because I worked with her at one time. I might have let the cat out of the bag. And then I even blatantly said, well, I'd show you, but I can't do it right here. But she wasn't drunk, so she may remember that. Maybe she'll have to go show her at work. I'm sure she will. It'll be awesome. So that's where my mind was going. Because I was reminiscing about a year ago when we were doing this and I was hammered. Crazy. That same gal said about how funny that episode was. I don't remember. I know I was giggling and falling out of my chair. Oh, fuck. You were messed up. That's funny. What's really funny is nice to know you don't listen to me. So now when I go, well, was that a good show? Because we'll get off the air and what will I say? So do you think that's a good show and you're gonna go yeah yeah now i know you have no fucking idea nor do you really you're like yeah i've been listening damn it have you you sure i don't listen to everything you say but i'm kidding wow at least you're honest and admitted that's all i listen to everything you say I've been mesmerized and everything else I've been mesmerized because I'm sure that I'm afraid it's recording soft I've been like paranoid this whole time it's like watching a heart monitor somebody's just
Speaker2:
supposed to be doing that it's supposed to be doing that yeah I gotta remember to like turn
Speaker1:
my volume up on that little thingy the soundboard yeah because yeah we're pretty fucking high tech here so you know I'm thinking I don't know when will we when we switch over to season three
Speaker3:
Thank you. board yeah because yeah we're pretty fucking high tech here so you know i i'm thinking i don't know
Speaker1:
when will we when will we switch over to season three after january one oh i don't know about that that's so it'll be our first show it'll be our first show before crazy winter nights and then we'll have a couple at crazy winter nights that we'll be doing also Hey, you got something from Dick.
Speaker2:
No, that's my Greek god.
Speaker1:
Oh, Lord. Yeah. So I chat with a guy from Greece. I chat with a little boy from Holland. Don't say that. He's of age. Let's put it out there. He's of age, yes. He looks like he's fucking 10. He looks like he's 12. Miss Amanda, by the way, if you want to contribute to our Patreon, please do. Miss Amanda needs plane tickets. She's going on a world fuck tour. And then I have a guy I text from the UK. Uh-huh, yeah, yeah. I need to plan a world tour. I'm all good with it. You weren't just texting. He did video sex at your job. Oh, we do all kinds of shit. We're constantly messaging back and forth. Fucking international slut. I love it. That's so fucking hot. He works for the airport and talked about buying me plane tickets. You're going to be baggage. He's listened to all the podcasts we have on video on YouTube. Really? Really? Well, that's awesome. So get her hooked up with the Maya High Club. I want a pair of wings. That's all I'm asking for. That would be pretty cool. Yeah, you're going to go on a world fucking world tour. What's that? What are you doing? What? Oh, hey, four minutes. Well, I've been drinking all day, so I don't know what the fuck's going on. Okay. You you have not uh yes she does have selective hearing uh i don't have selective hearing you select to shut it the fuck off i bet if i had an accent around this 24 7 you learned to block some of it i'll bet if i had an accent a european accent i'd get further uh oui oui well that's how i wanted to make sure the guy was actually from the UK. Oh, yeah, there you go. I said, I want to hear your voice. And then you can't understand him. You know that whole thing we did at the early part of the show about safety and stuff like that? Trust me, before she's going on a world tour anywhere, A, we're pushing for two tickets. Somebody's got to be her bitch on the trip. I guess that'd be me. I have pictures of his tattoos. Pictures of his dick.
Speaker3:
For identification.
Speaker2:
Oh, yeah. I do. It's identification purposes.
Speaker1:
And what's the dick pictures for?
Speaker3:
Pleasure.
Speaker1:
There we go. It's going to be a hell of a vacation. I can't wait to explain that. Your mother's going to Europe for three months.
Speaker3:
Where are you going?
Speaker1:
I don't fucking know. So if anybody will have me for three months.
Speaker3:
Island hopping.
Speaker1:
I mean, I'm going island hopping. We'll be recording this shit via, like, we'll have to try and coordinate times and shit. Yeah. We'll be recording our show from a dozen. That's all right. That's okay. It's all good. Just saying. All right. Yeah, so we should probably go. Yeah, probably. We'll minutes all right well i'll be damn uh hey so once again let's give another shout out to our sponsor uh www.sexystripperclothing.com remember when you need quality clothing for exotic events r festivals, pole dancing, adult parties. They are the folks you need to go see. They specialize in sexy stripper clothing, footwear, and that's so hot, dresses and lingerie, and much, much more. www.sexystripperclothing.com Hey, don't forget, we want to win some ASN awards. We want to be doing one of these from Vegas, kids. Go on to www.asnlifestylemagazine.com backslash vote. Miss Amanda has her ass on one of those. I just found out today. Yeah, but we can also. After I've already voted, but hey, whatever. We can also, you can go down and we are up for sexiest podcast, Crazy Truth. Do a big click on that one. Party theme, Crazy Winter Nights by Cole and Amanda. That's us. And newcomer of the year, that would be the Crazy Casm organization. Best booty. Yep, and Miss Amanda's in the best booty. But make sure you vote for us. We appreciate it. My picture's the one. I'm on my side. There's a couple. I have a t-shirt on and a thong. It's in black and white in case you're trying to search for it and determine which one it is. Or just send her a message and if you're from Europe, she'll go ahead and send you a message. I'm just kidding. Send her a message and she'll send you her ass pictures. And then don't forget also www.crazywinternights.com Sign up today. Get your tickets, kids. There are still VIP passes available.
Speaker3:
This is going to be the party that you do not want to miss. So make sure you are coming soon. So with that being said, kids, here we go. Coming soon. Coming soon, January 17th through the 19th.
Speaker1:
We got to go. Doing it the only way I know how, the only way I want to, and the only motherfucking way I ever will. Casbah Style.
