Krazy Truth #36 Playing Hide the Wiener

Transcript

Speaker1: Hey kids, the program you're about to listen to contains some adult situations, adult language, themes, and other adult topics. If you're easily offended, this show's not for you. Do you need a little more glide in your slide? Or the other way around? Slide in your glide? Either way, you need to visit our good friends at Spunk Lube. but that's right. They'll make sure that your penis will slide in and out in no time at all uh spunk lube you always have a friend in casbah visit them at www.spunklube.com and put casbah in the coupon code hey you crazy motherfuckers welcome back to another edition of crazy truth this would be season two episode three which is otherwise known as season two episode 35 i'm the no it's 35 i posted for last week i don't know no he's playing as episode four it's the fourth show welcome to season two it's our first day here i'm your host with the most i'm cole i'm here with the lovely lovely miss amanda hey and we're here to answer your questions and do all kinds of fun stuff yeah that's that's what we do that's what we do it's we got a good show tonight this shit's gonna be we got some quality shit happening here tonight so you know we normally start off the show right well you can hear you suck on that crazy winter nights are coming up guess what? Suck. Uh, okay. So, Hey, you know, uh, uh, you know how we normally start off the show, right? Well, you can hear you suck on that one. Yeah, man. Crazy winter nights are coming up.
Speaker2: Guess what?
Speaker3: Suck.
Speaker1: Okay, so hey, you know how we always start the show off with crazy sex news, right?
Speaker2: Yes.
Speaker1: Okay, so tonight, we're not going to do crazy sex news. We're just going to do stupid people news.
Speaker2: Okay. Okay.
Speaker1: Okay, so yeah, in Chicago, a woman is now officially banned from Walmart. You might ask why. Why? How does one get banned from Walmart? Well, a lot of different reasons. Well, this one's super special. So apparently she took the day, according to employees, she spent the day drinking wine out of an open Pringles can and driving around in one of the electric carts all day long. Was this an employee? No, it was a customer. Did she eat the Pringles first and then fill the Pringles can? Because the wine bottle can't fit in a Pringles can. You know, they didn't actually say. I should have got the Pringles can out, damn it. to try it now because you're in walmart or just in general well anywhere because here's the deal it had to it's not like they jumped on her within 10 minutes of this thing she was doing it all day long so obviously she was making trips to the liquor store or to her car or something until she was getting drunk enough that it became an obvious problem that is awesome i don't care who you are you know what when we're old and when i'm old and senile you know kids hey to my boys if you're listening just take me to walmart make sure the cart's plugged in and really juiced up and turn me loose and come back and get me later that day it is gonna be the greatest thing in the world just let me go cruising all over the fucking place yeah whatever yeah we could have races you know we will you know you and i will have absolutely have races i will still be able to walk right but we'll still have races because well we can it'll be fun to do it okay yeah i'm just i'm just saying it is what it is you know we'll do it is that playtime at walmart Walmart? Yeah, no shit. Who are these crazy old people? Why do they keep coming back in? They just do it for entertainment once a week. Just leave them alone. Don't worry. They don't hurt anybody. They're senile as fuck. It's all good. Yeah, that would be awesome. Vision runs in my family. No shit. No. Yeah, it does. It's hearing. It's hearing. That's right. This would be awesome. I won't be able to see where the fuck I'm going, and I'll be screaming at you, where am I, where am I, and you won't be able to hear me. Darn it. And you'll be way ahead of me. You'll be like four loads. Four loads. What are you doing at Walmart, you dirty, dirty whore? Jeez. You'll be four more aisles ahead of me. It might be the first time I'm going to call COVID today, so I'm with it. Just so you all know, we record these on Sunday, so there's nothing better than have multiple times that you're watching me called a pervert on Sunday. And not by me, I might add. No. Thank you. Thank you very much. So what do we want to talk about? Want to talk about anything today? I don't give a shit. Okay, so we're going to do something way different today. Okay, number one, we're getting excited because next week, this will be like three weeks from now for you guys listening, we're actually going to be doing a live show. So this is like a practice for the live show.
Speaker3: Three weeks from now?
Speaker2: No.
Speaker1: Yeah, I know. It'll be after the fact. I'm just practicing. Here's what it is. I'm trying to give foreshadowing. Trust me, you want to hear cool things coming.
Speaker3: Yeah, but you're foreshadowing way too far.
Speaker1: Jesus. Maybe they're Jedisis it's like the week after okay the weekend what just here's the deal now nobody knows for sure so you have to listen to every episode till you figure out the special one how about that wow okay so we're gonna do something different you know do i have questions from people sure i do uh but we're gonna take a couple of questions uh but they're gonna be our questions so the first question up this question was posed to us i.e me at at the chasmus studios during one of our rehearsals earlier this morning uh and it was why do guys speak in code that's right why do guys speak What the fuck? Now, here's the thing. This is not a new thing because in past shows we've talked about, we've had people on our live. Of course, if you're not familiar with us, we have a huge secret Facebook page, Crazy Casbah, which they're watching us right now. And we've had people ask us on there before, why don't guys talk more to girls? Right. And so the question is question is is why do guys continually speak in code it's like there's two forms of there's two ways that guys do this it's you're like uh you know caveman ish and like me you fuck or it's like you know they get all shy and like you really have lovely lovely eyes and kick the dirt and look down at me i kind of wonder hi he it's like find a happy fucking medium it's kind of what your question is why don't guys have I'll see you next time. eye and like you really have lovely lovely eyes and kick the dirt and look down at me i kind of wonder hope hi he it's like find a happy fucking medium it's kind of what your question is why don't guys have a happy medium would that be close no it's why you have to decipher what they're trying to say i'm not a mind reader no no we don't rehearse no no we don't actually rehearse we don't rehearse that was we were just having general conversation no yes yeah we never we never rehearse trust me it would be too polished uh no so but it is true so all the time you have a lot of guys i know you don't and every girl you have a lot of guys that are interested in, you know, playing hide the wiener with you and hide the wiener with you. Hide the wiener. Yeah, that would be their penis hiding.
Speaker2: You wasn't there. Okay.
Speaker1: So anyways, they have guys that are interested in playing hide the wiener with you. But the problem is, is that they, sometimes they can be kind of keyboard, keyboard rock stars and or in the early stages. This is what it is. In the early stages, they of keyboard rock stars.
Speaker2: Or in the early stages. This is what it is.
Speaker1: In the early stages, they're keyboard rock stars.
Speaker4: They're like, hey, baby.
Speaker1: But as it gets closer to, like, you know, showtime,
Speaker2: their direction starts. I don't agree.
Speaker1: You know, with what? I don't even know if I've made a point yet, for sure or not.
Speaker2: But go ahead.
Speaker3: Well, I don't agree with they start off with, hey, baby,
Speaker2: and all this stuff. No, it's just some guys just blurt it out, and some guys beat around the bush so hard you don't know if that's what they're really talking about or if they're talking about something else. If you want to beat the bush, you can't beat around it first. Look, if you want to score, you can't. You have to take the shot. No, you've had this before. You've had guys that have messaged you, you've messaged back and forth and and when they're not in person like i want to do this and i'm gonna lick you like this and i'm gonna turn you on your head and fucking do this and then i'm gonna tie you up and do this and then when you get them i have it in person they're like hi and you're like i well tie me up and do this let alone you haven't even touched me yet for Christ's sakes. So you have guys that do that. And there's a reason for that, I truly believe. There's a reason for that because guys are. I can't run with my left hand. That's what she said. What's wrong with just saying let's fuck? There's nothing wrong with saying let's fuck. At least you know what they want to do. Okay, so here's the thing. We understand, and you hate to bash too much because guys are trying to be respectful, right? Okay, and we know Andy said, hey, what's wrong with just saying let's fuck? Andy's nickname is asshole. Rude asshole. Rude asshole. That's what he calls himself. But no, so there's this degree of trying to be like you know suave polite that kind of that kind of stuff that's what they're somewhat trying to do but when you when a female thinks they're starting they're gonna start flirting and then it's totally not what you thought and you're just like oh basically and no andy it doesn't have anything to do with our conversation earlier i just wasn't we still know what tools so uh the thing is is that okay so in a perfect world you have been your you have let's go with a couple different scenarios perfect world number one you've never met the person you only you've only met online how would you like that conversation to lead up to so that you know that when you do meet,
Speaker4: there's going to be a little hide the wiener going on?
Speaker1: How would you like that conversation to go?
Speaker2: Okay. What do you mean by hide the wiener? That's a shy? No, hide the wiener. That's going to fuck you. Didn't we just go through this? Hide the wiener. Wiener in pussy.
Speaker3: Oh, hide it. Well, I don't know. It could have turtled.
Speaker2: I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know it could have turtled i don't know then it's fine the wiener this is not hide the wiener it's fine though it's fine the wiener get a blowtorch that fucker's cold oh my god see codes why does it have to be coded so okay so tell, so tell us, so tell us what, if you've never met him, what would you, how would you like the conversation to go leading up to the point of fucking? I'm not even going to say codes anymore. What's wrong with saying, I'm interested in hooking up if you are? Okay, there's nothing wrong with saying that. So you would, okay, so. But if you're not interested, then you have to kind of tell them how to woo. How to woo. Talk to me, damn it. No, okay, no. It is not just talk to you. I mean, I totally didn't say that bullshit right now. Okay. Okay? It is not just talking to you, like, chatting on, like, electronic devices. It's then what the way you talk on electronic devices. Then when you're live and in person, do it. Do the same shit. Look, here's the thing. If we've met you before or if we have talked to you online before. OK, and we're to the point that it looks like and everybody's pretty sure there's going to be some sex involved when we finally meet up again live and in person again it's not like it starts back over at square zero okay we've moved all past that it's it's kind of like reading a book there's a reason you have a bookmark there right so you read when you stop reading you put the bookmark in when you go to read the book again you don't start over at page one okay you start where the bookmark is right okay so this is the same thing with sex here's the deal if you've read through the first chapters you flirted you've chatted either you it's been all online and now we're up to we haven't met yet stop and the bookmark goes in so when you meet in line in line when you meet in in person look what page you start with that's you know and that's perfect in a way you go right so it's it's the same i can't do anything about it it's the same thing it's the same thing with it's the same thing with if we've already met you live in person okay all hell is breaking loose around here here's what's really funny they're all pushing on the computer that it wasn't it yeah it was i doubt it because i just got a twitter thing it was a computer all right well whatever i'm new so okay it's the same thing if we've already met you once okay we've met you live and in person and we party we flirted with whatever we've done or whatever did you do i don't know what i'm i'm usually off chat i'm off smoking whatever so whatever it is you're doing so okay so there's basically agreed upon we're gonna fuck the next time just take it up from the bookmark like just just dive right in from there i will give leeway to some people that have the anxiety issues why Why? Because they're not going to come up and approach you, but you can go up to them and... I will give them leeway when they have not met you once yet. Okay. Look, here's the deal. Okay. And you know what? Get ready, everybody. Everybody listening, are you all ready? For those of you that say I'm an arrogant fucking prick i am uh dick with arms whoo here's the deal i understand that some people initially are intimidated to walk up and talk to us especially you why are they intimidated to talk to you i don't let me see you have a nice ass you have nice tits you're hot and rumor has it you're a good fuck i spread those rumors just so you know and it's true anyway so we have references it's all good so okay so the thing is is i understand the first time it can be intimidating because you're a hot chick look hot chicks intimidate me i get scared sometimes when i wake up with you it is what it is so okay but the thing is is once you spend like two minutes talking with us you find out i'm just a big fucking goof ass and you're super sweet and super nice We'll see you next time. thing is is once you spend like two minutes talking with us you find out i'm just a big fucking goof ass and you're super sweet and super nice and easy you're you've got to be the the hottest easiest chick to talk to i don't know if i worded that she's hot oh somebody's sound guy kick in on that she is she is uh she is that down fix that that was loud that hurt my ears you are you are the the hottest and and easiest to communicate with possibly slutty just saying definitely shot person in lifestyle it takes like two minutes to know that so after you've already met us i promise you if it's been three months six months a year we haven't changed we've not become like yep now we're douchebags hey how you doing who are you you know that's not how this shit works so don't be afraid to fucking you know talk with us and communicate with us like normal because you've already you've already met us so i'll give you the first time you know now i'm also gonna give every guy a little bit of a pass because every guy, no matter how much you have talked to people, no, we just cackled. Sorry, the broom's still running outside. So the thing is that... You can't what? You can't fix it? Sorry. It'll be fun. It adds character character I'll try to control my laugh the thing is is that I'll give every guy a little bit of a break only because even no matter how much you're like you don't want to get shot down we've had that discussion before okay so but guys read the signs look here's a really good way to know whether or not Miss Amanda is interested in you in any way shape or form at all are you ready for this take notes Let's go. read the signs. Look, here's a really good way to know whether or not Miss Amanda is interested in you in any way, shape or form at all. Are you ready for this? Take notes. Everybody get your patent pencil out. If you send her constant messages and she does not respond, she doesn't like you and you're not going to fuck her. It's really that fucking simple. Okay. It just will not happen. If she continuously ignores your shit, there's a reason for that. Or if her husbandores your shit there's a reason for that or if her husband gets involved there's a reason for that okay so if she actually communicates with you and talks with you and enjoys the interaction with you you probably have a shot just throwing out there it's really easy this shit is not rocket science so the thing is now if you act like a tool bag when you're around her well then that's probably going to kill that opportunity just saying if you do what i wasn't listening now we understand here i'll just move this away from you now why does she even need headphones on she's not listening to me anyway no i was reading i said if if they act like a tool around you that that's a good way to that's a good way to fucking you know kill it yeah so just be you just relax you know follow through don't start over every time her co cooter's getting anxious, he gets hungry. Hide the wiener. I'm going to say 8,000 times, so all day tomorrow when she's at work, all she's going to think about is hiding the wiener. I can't believe. No. Oh, God. Yeah, no, yes, yes, nobody likes harassing messages. by the same token let me take and just throw this out here too for one quick second the one thing i will i always say this to you and you always remind me of this too when we're talking about messages this goes out a lot to the folks on my page that are listening live right now remember as much as nobody likes harassing messages it takes fucking balls or or or big lips whatever you want to say i don't care to to have the courage to instant message somebody okay so some people it's their it's their roundabout way to do it obviously we try to control that to a degree but remember it does take courage and whatever and and give everybody a chance see that's why i don't understand why you're ever have trouble with stuff because all these fucking all these uh dude you're nice to everybody i've yet to see you i mean now we've had this conversation about when you were younger and what a bitch you were to people but but i mean all these guys now you've always been nice to people and this goes the same for chicks too by the way it goes for chicks she's bi she He them both oh hack up alone it's my nature to be nice to everybody that was switch hitting uh-huh yep uh okay i'm taking a question right now hold on reading it's not a question it's a statement okay so tony good this is a great question or a great statement uh and hold and I'll get to yours, too, also, reading. It's not a question, it's a statement. Okay, so Tony, this is a great statement. And hold on, I'll get to yours too also, Reggie. Tony says, I like to chat and call people in advance of meetings so we can establish a rapport. It's really difficult to approach people you've never talked to before. And that is true. And that is true. And that's why, you know, if you follow the rules, right, of whatever group page, whatever you're on, and start a communication process, that's awesome. You want to do that. But then the biggest thing is, what happens is, you've got guys that are ready to fuck, but they're being wishy-washy. But make that effort to walk across the room. Remember when we were sitting at the bar? Yeah. When there was only like three couples in couples in there and one was on a website and they're messaging saying we're at this bar come talk to us but they don't have any face pictures on and we're like we're at the same bar come say hi to us and we had face pictures on and they didn't come over to us and it's just They thought I was ugly. What the hell?
Speaker3: No.
Speaker1: It was just it was just a really weird communication of no you come to us no you come to us yeah make the effort to get up and do that yeah now for some people it's difficult if you have that issue yeah talk to people ahead of time to make that communication a start find a way to reach out once you start what's the worst that can happen you might meet somebody that's that turns into be a friend you never get to fuck so so what what's the big deal okay and yes i'm gonna answer this question because reggie is hammering me on this uh about what what about me does this apply with me no none of the rules apply with me you need to understand that at all time reggie that's what's most important you always now look here's the deal obviously sometimes we've talked about this some events uh it's it's hard to get uh it's it's hard to get alone time with people so remember it's not that we don't want to it's just hard to catch us and we want i've had a long time with regina yeah i know you i've talked to her i know you did a while you were talking to her i was over taking care of some dude that was naked in a hallway pissing on a door yes you did see if we remember right right so i mean that's it that's the thing uh here's the other thing a good thing to do and tony this goes back to you a good thing to do is take advantage of any type of unique events, okay, that are going on in the area, that are going on in the area that you might like to take and, you know, see. Okay, so Jen has a good question. How do you handle people that you're not into and just message you over and over to hang out and fuck? Okay, here's the deal and this guy goes it looks like also denise okay yes it goes denise also on our page goes there's a difference between on notes amandas i notice you you're absolutely beautiful and hey i want you to lick my balls that might that might be we might have sent a free shirt for that one that could be quote of the day okay jenna dean it's your birth right and this is a key message to everybody and it applies both to men and women very simply this it is one thing again follow the rules initially get permission to take and private message or whatnot then think about it common sense look if you're a douchebag if you're going every day hey hey morning hey you want to show me your tits hey hey and you're not getting an response knock it the fuck off it's really that simple now if you're the one receiving that you tell the motherfucker to knock it the fuck off and if you are in a couple and the guy won't knock it off when you say it then you need to have your husband say knock it the fuck off and if they don't, then you need to get an admin or something involved. Block them, whatever. But you also can't lead those people on either. And that does happen a lot, okay? Here's the deal. When you find somebody's that's being bullshit you can't flirt with them cutesy cutesy at the club and then get pissy when they fucking want to send you a bunch of shit all week long and then be all pissed about it then be cutesy cutesy the club again i'm not saying you you girls aren't doing that but i'm just saying it's it's important to keep the difference because people do do that it's like you can't send mixed signals look there's a whole lot of ways in this lifestyle that you can take and go from being the good guy to the villain to the good guy really fucking quick part of this lifestyle is you have to have your head out of your fucking ass i mean that that's it sounds so basic but when you start dealing with with messages remember yeah if you're sending look no chick has ever fucking just ended up bag and somebody going to fucking a dude because they were just a crude piece of shit okay if a chick does fuck you like that you don't want your dick in that anyways it's that fucking simple so if you're gonna act like a tool we're supposed to be adults if you want to act like junior high and high school then go back and pick up junior high and high school girls you know obviously I probably wouldn't do that duh but just saying just saying. But the thing is, is act like an adult, okay? But definitely, you know, if you're going to send those types of messages, get those type of responses. Okay, hold on. I'm trying to read as we go through. Depends on the person, depending on if they find it harassed or not. Right, exactly. Well, let's put it in a little bit perspective i have one guy that has a cell number of mine one of them messages me every day and it's titty tuesday it's you know it's thong thursday okay and then when i wasn't responding to that then he instant messaged me i didn't respond to that so then he decided to try kick and i didn't even open that i'm like there reaches a point there i know i'm not the only person he does it to no and that's just it and the thing is with people like that what you need to do is you need to get a hold of admins party admins whoever he's harassing me i know yeah i told you i was all ready to take care of that crap and i even blatantly said i'm not gonna send stuff to you when i've never even met you right we just won't i mean the thing is is yeah you want to be respectful but part of that is conversation you're gonna you can pick up pretty quick how much somebody wants to talk to you by the conversation or not to talk to you and here's the thing ladies or guys if you're the one receiving those messages it's about we always preach this communication what the hell communication it's the same thing communicate with somebody hey you know what i'm really busy i don't spend a lot of time on this you know i don't like to get a lot of messes on this whatever just say it what do you just being honest that's the the best way to do it is just be honest and let people know that's that's a big thing i'm all about that honesty so but you know pick up some clues guys some of these guys have to pull their head out of their butt a little bit guys are kind of kind of clueless on that yeah some women do too well yeah it it it goes it goes both ways yeah that's the other thing i think is funny is a lot of people don't think it goes both ways at all i think there's this misunderstanding it's like it's like sexual harassment you know we've all had to watch sexual harassment videos at work and people giggle a lot of times about the fact that uh when they show the examples of a guy being harassed by a woman well the thing is is it that happens in real life it really does happen as a society we don't listen to it as much but it really happens so it's the same in the lifestyle you have females that can be overly aggressive right and so that send messages all the time that don't know. So when we preach this stuff, and I use you as an example a lot, because you're my lovely, lovely co-host, and you're sitting right here, and we practiced it that way. But it happens both ways. I mean, it doesn't happen to me, but I've heard rumors that guys get bombarded with messages. I don't get messages. You get some. I get some. You used to. I get more, like, questions or advice questions. I get a lot of advice questions. The doctor's in. Yeah, right, right. And what I found is those don't lead to sex. Yeah, not usually. No, it's just, you know, it's just not near as effective of a pickup tool as I used to think it might be. So, you know, remember that one sex story with the doctor doing the chicks in jail? Yeah. See, that doctor, the doctor doesn't have as much clob as it used to. Otherwise, I'd get laid more. That's how that works. Just saying. Good. Okay, so there you go. There's one of your questions. Good job. Great question. That was awesome. I'm really glad that you asked how coding got for that i have no idea yeah so yeah well you know it's kind of always i'm always listening on that okay so this is a great time for us to take a quick break and thank our second half sponsors do you want to do this no you don't i'll do it okay ready pause for a second okay hey would you like the opportunity to advertise on a brand new up and coming hot podcast and its second season reaching thousands of listeners every single week would you like the opportunity to have your business name mentioned on sls radio demon seed radio and be in front of between six and seven thousand lifesty people every single week? If so, contact the show today at crazy, K-R-A-Z-Y.KASBH, K-A-S-B-H, and put Marketing Department, and we'll have one of our marketing representatives reach out to you about some possible advertising and sponsorship of the Crazy Truth Podcast. All right, and we're back.
Speaker2: All right, got to love those breaks. The marketing department, I love that. All right, so, okay, so I guess we should have, like, a question or something. We should answer a question. Do you think? Sure. What are we doing? Really? Hey, Wendy's on. Everybody knows it's Wendy. Okay, so a question comes to us.
Speaker1: I'm not going to say where the question comes from us. The sound guy's lost his stick. All right, so this question is, how do you deal with, and this is funny, this was not a question from us.
Speaker2: Okay. Okay.
Speaker1: How do you deal with when one of the spouses seems to get all the attention and the other gets none? This would be like a little piggy story.
Speaker3: This little piggy went to market. Everybody has that happen.
Speaker2: Well.
Speaker3: Every couple does.
Speaker1: Do you think?
Speaker2: Yeah.
Speaker1: All the time?
Speaker2: Consistently?
Speaker1: No, it flip flops.
Speaker3: Or do you think it flip flops?
Speaker2: Okay.
Speaker1: But there's one, at a certain time, there's one that always gets more than the other. And it goes in spurts. It's been so long since I've gotten any attention. God. Somebody love me. Attention whore. I don't get any attention. So, okay, do you, but do you, but do you, attention whore, this is not your moment. Do you truly feel like it flip-flops? Yes. Yeah. Well, what? So what do you do when it's not your turn? I sit there and watch girls make out with you and everything else. Oh, fuck. Yeah, okay. All right, so that's happened like one time in seven years. Great. Wendy put you off. My ship came in that one moment in time, and I was too drunk to jump on it. No, it doesn't happen that that often i think guys get the short end of the stick there are times when you're just talking to everybody well just because i'm talking everybody doesn't mean i'm getting attention maybe i'm trying to get it maybe i'm like that fucking puppy or like that dog on the old cartoon spike spike hey see Spike, hey, Spike. Hey, see me?
Speaker2: Maybe that's what's going on. How many people have seen you so drunk that you've been sticking straws in every orifice that you've got? Not every orifice.
Speaker1: I've never stuck a straw up my ass or in my penal hole. Thank you.
Speaker2: What was classic was when you stuck the woman on the forehead with gum. Yeah, okay. Well, I am pleased. And it wasn't your gum.
Speaker1: I don't know whose gum you took the gum. Neither do I. Actually, I don't know. That was like stealing the pizza from those other people's table that's kind of fun uh no but okay so how do we know is is it really maybe i was just trying to compete for attention yeah well okay so how do you deal with that here's the deal we have a unique situation with this what what got a few going i need yeah i need i need my titties to hang out more that helps get more attention no how do you deal with it because this is like okay we have a unique perspective of this a very unique perspective because ours is not the average like dealing with no somebody once i not get as much attention as the other because I'm kind of like the mouth weird. I'm like the mouthpiece of us as a couple. You got to fucking say something. You're just sitting there looking at me. You're killing me. No, cause I'm trying to think and listen to you. Well, there's our first part. No, but I mean a lot of people look because when we do our lives on our page and stuff it's always you know it's always me kind of leading the way with it a little i let you be the vocal one right i'm more standoff anyway you're not stand no i stand off and my ass looks shitty and i don't look pretty and nobody likes me no but i mean the thing is is that ours is kind of ours is almost by design that way yeah right we complement each other that Right, we do, because, I mean, the thing is, is that ours is kind of, ours is almost by design that way. Yeah. Right? We compliment each other that way. Right. We do. Because, I mean, you know, look. When he can't get you to shut up, I sit here and go. Look at my boobs. Laurel's not funny without Hardy. You know, Abbott's not funny without Costello. Wait till they know who Laurel and Harry are. Holy fuck. Okay. All of a sudden, I'm sorry, I used old people references. For all of the older generation, give a big shout out for knowing who that is. I mean, you've got some people watching, I don't know if they even know who it is. I get people in the room that I don't even know who the fuck they are. Yeah, exactly. The sound guy's like, I have no idea. You know who Laurel and Harry is, don't you? Okay. Oh, he shakes his head up very... I don't know what's a better... Up-to-date one, I have no idea. Han Solo and Chewbacca. Probably Penn and Teller at this point. Okay, yeah, Penn and Teller. There you go. Penn and Teller or something like that, okay? I'm the short one. You're the really tall one. I was going to say, if you say the fat one, motherfucker, I'm going to kick your ass. I have hair. Oh, you bitch. No, doesn't the quiet one? Who is the quiet one? It depends. Which one are you talking about? The short one. All I know is Penn's gay. I'm not. What? I'm just saying. Yeah. No. Yeah. Yeah, you're the short one. You say quiet. Anyway. Isn't he bald? No. I don't know. The thing, quit talking about hair. It makes me self-conscious. The thing is, is that what happens is, you know, it's by design. It's part of their shtick and their act. And that's kind of the way we are. So I think other people have more of a unique, their question is more, it goes deeper than that for some couples. It can create a very big problem okay i think number one you have to as a couple sometimes you have to know and realize that you're not getting all the attention from the other couple or from the other people you're're not getting shit. You're taking the attention. And there's a huge motherfucking difference there.
Speaker2: Yeah.
Speaker1: Because look, here's the one. I'm the loudest. I'm a big guy. I'm six foot tall. I'm 280 pounds. I wear black fingernail polish and rings and I am loud and I have a loud laugh. And I walk in and everybody fucking knows I'm in a room because I'm a big jolly faggot i'm like the kool-aid guy you know i can bust into the fucking door right so but even i can take and make it so that no one knows i'm in a room so the thing is is it is not so much that everybody's giving you the attention you're're seeking it out, you're taking the attention. So if you and your spouse are having issues, number one, and we've watched other people do that. We've watched other couples almost compete for attention. We've watched couples where new meat, new meat walks in. Oh, yeah. And it's like the wife doesn't even fucking exist, or it's like the husband doesn't even exist you have to be conscious of that okay you also have to be conscious of do you choose to be in the background the one thing i've learned through through the lifestyle i can be over doing straws on my nose doing whatever fucking stupid shit i'm doing all through the corner and i can look over and you can have a hell of a crowd surrounding you and you're talking and you're flirting and whatever and you can get just as much attention okay but you have to you have to again you're having to get it you have to get it and and that's part of it you have to be willing to put yourself out there now i understand that look sometimes attention is good sometimes attention uh is not so good okay understand I'll see you next time. out there now i understand that look sometimes attention is good sometimes attention uh is not so good okay understand and i'm going to put this out there and be very very clear look don't think the spotlight doesn't come with some fucking shit okay and i don't care and i'm not talking you know like obviously we have the page we have the podcast i'm not i'm just talking in general long before we ever had any of this other stuff we saw it with couples when you seek out the limelight you will find people that are jealous you will find people that are haters you will find people that are all those things how you process that how you deal with that that's on you okay because it goes with the territory look you don't get to be the big drunk clown and not be prepared and or act surprised when somebody goes he's just a fucking drunken clown it did it goes with it hello it's it's part of it so you have to know and that's on every level have to know. Look, if every time somebody new walks in, you come up and you go snail trail slime over to them. Hey, baby. Boom. All cheese dick on them. People are going to recognize that every time a new girl walks in the place, you're going to fucking do that. And you know what they're going to say to their friends? Watch out. Because guess what? Johnny cheese dick over here is going to come sliding over to you as soon as you get here and they do every time or you're going to or you're the new guy and the girl is going to come in and and some girl is just going to be fucking you know just draped all over you like a fucking you know or every new guy that walks through is going to be draped all over him like like a fucking you know a a rug for Christ's sake. Everybody knows that it happens. But understand, if you want that, you can have it, but it comes with consequences. And the thing is, is you have to deal with it. And as a couple, okay, if one person's starting to get way more attention or feels like they're getting left out, here's the deal. when you're a fucking couple it is your each other's responsibility to watch out for each other okay there's like okay this is like the ultimate pet peeve in my world it really is okay because here's the deal i know where you are when we go to a, I know where you are at all times. You know where I am at all times. You know who I'm hanging out with or if I'm over talking with people, I know who you're talking with. And obviously, if we're playing alone, we both know that. If the room is really crowded and I can't see you across it. No, but you listen from over. No, you hear you. But we know because we talk to you and we communicate with each other most of the time i'm right next to you anyway yeah generally we're together but the thing is is that is a choice that is 100 a choice and as a couple here's the deal if you're not in tune if you go to an event and you are so out of tune with your significant other that you don't see that they are feeling hurt, left out, whatever the case may be, then you need to rethink how you're doing it. And I can honestly say that from experience. I can say that that has happened to me. I've been that guy that we were an event and I got all fucking liquored up. Weird. I got all fucking liquored up and got caught up in the moment when i was getting a whole bunch of attention and i lost focus well what did we do about it on the way home we fucking talked about it on the way home we talked about it for the next day we it became a priority to us then to make sure that you know what we didn't do that again that we didn't do it again. And that's the thing is that, you know, you have to take and you have to communicate. You have to make a difference with it at all times. You have to want that, okay? Just saying that. Yeah, yeah, and that's exactly right. Now, if you happen to have a Tigger with you, then you're just fucked because Tigger's going to bounce take over the room just saying okay we got a question coming through here uh my husband gets it at the parties we go to where the guys go after me and he gets pushed i just said hey if you want something for me ask my husband and it weeds out the dicks and the good ones that's a really good point there it's a great way if you're trying to find a way to make sure that everybody is involved so that your significant other is not uh left out of the fucking of the whatever's going on use them as a shield and here's the deal guy or girl it doesn't matter hey you know what yeah i'd like to get to know you too that's really good but you know i want you to know my wife or i want you to know my husband use them include them make them make I'll see you next week. yeah i'd like to get to know you too that's really good but you know i want you to get to know my wife or i want you to know my husband use them include them make them make make a way because here's the deal ultimately you're that other person is going to be involved in a decision on sex at some point in time regardless so get them involved early look you have to want to be equals to be equals. I don't give a fucking fuck if it's your job, if it's your job, if it's in a family, if it's at a swingers club. I don't care. It doesn't matter. You have to want and work to make sure that you're both equal. And that means you have to communicate and you have to stay in focus. You have to stay in tune. Your number one priority, if you truly believe in it, is always 100% the other person. Your significant other. No matter what. It doesn't matter. Right. And if you come up with anything other than that, that's a bullshit excuse. It is what it is. Okay? So booze doesn't count it. Fucking, you know, caught up in the moment. Nothing. No. That's not how this game works you know at all so you got to take and go through with it uh let's see bill and you have the ones that uh they show off and tease but if they're approached about doing more they balk at it yeah because it's off yeah there's some weird things out there and that's one of the other things is there's some different kinks you know that's some different kinks as well that yeah again communication for those you don't know that just tuned in i am reading off of our live walks we do this live every week uh well okay uh what if you're assuming other isn't into social media or chatting there are more of a face-to-face communicator rock on that's an excellent excellent question then here's the thing if okay then you make sure that you are having an equal number of events that give them that opportunity to do face-to-face chatting and number two here let's say if your strength is social media then use your strength to help your partner okay here's the deal this is how this works okay and it's a partnership let's break it down even simpler than that let's break it down yeah make sure boobs stand up there you go let's break it down even simpler than that let's go old school okay let's not even call it a partnership you're each other's fucking wingman usually if you're in this lifestyle okay granted we've had this discussion we know there's some people just for plutonic friends great those people shut off the show don't listen at this point in time for the rest of us that are in this for sex and sport fucking whatnot here's the deal you're each other you're you are the the perfect wingman for your You know what they like, you know their personalities other you know what they like you know their personalities you know the things they don't like right you know if they've had too much to drink you know if they're in a good mood bad mood whatever you have every answer you have more answer about them than you ever did your best friend in high school or college or whatever so your primary number one job is to be each other's wingman so if your strength is social media use your strength to help reach out to for their strength and vice versa if your strength is face-to-face contact and they're kind of you know they're not real strong on the social media stuff use your fucking strength accordingly use your social strength to say hey you know what man you should really friend us on or be in this group or whatever the case maybe because you know he has more time to talk that way or whatever the case maybe i don't care that that's how this shit works you know i mean you you have to you have to work together even if you don't swing together you need to play alone okay now if you absolutely don't want to okay and i get it there's some people that i don't want to know anything about what my spouse is doing that's why we do it that way okay whatever that's fine then at that point in time you know find a friend and get a wingman i mean there's you know but i think if you care about but you can help them arrange to meet each other to have well you can you can help make them arrange you still care about their safety in theory well yeah i mean again in theory so you can help them help them arrange help them work we do it all the time there's a million times i'll sit here well not a million because i get like two text messages a year okay so when i get that one text message from that one girl that hasn't seen my picture yet that goes hey are you hot and i'm like yeah uh and we actually text i'll go i have to all the time i'm like hey read this does this sound good does this sound all right yeah and there's times you'll ask me about you know hey you know the other the same way with a guy you know so uh it's like it help each other. That's what it is. Okay. We're going to another question.
Speaker2: Wow.
Speaker1: Can make sure you save some questions for next week, too. This is awesome.
Speaker2: Okay.
Speaker1: So what is our view on other couples stalking and harassing you just because they want one person from the couple? You told them no, but they will not leave you alone. Do you want to start or you want me to? Well, anytime I've ever said we only play as a couple that pretty much shut people down i haven't had people no that's a very and that's very nice answer well of course that's very nice because you're nice i'm nice you want to know what my answer is what tell them to fucking knock it off here's the deal you know what and in no uncertain terms in no uncertain terms look i'm on a rampage night for this week's show okay it is what it is so here's the thing the lifestyle is only hard because we make it hard and we make it hard and you i said hard boy the thing sometimes well we make each other hard or what just saying anyways back to the point the thing is is that here's the deal you know what I don't know. hard boy the thing sometimes well we make each other harder what just saying anyways back to the point the thing is is that here's the deal you know what if if you if this is the same as in real life if you have tried to be polite and say i appreciate it we're not interested and and that's all the more you should have to say and nope you do not owe anybody a fucking long-term explanation for shit okay it here's the explanation it's my dick i don't want to stick it there it's her pussy she don't want you to stick it there that's how this works right in real life so if you tried obviously we're all adults right so you try the adult method first with is hey look we really appreciate the offer but we're not interested if it doesn't stop sometimes in life you have to break things down to the most common denominator you know when you deal with a child or when you when you're when you're a manager at work and you try to present things in a professional way an environment and you say no you can't do this this is why this is the rules blah blah sometimes you actually have to break it down and just say look motherfucker i said no drop it because you're mean because because i'm a dick this is why i'm a dick with arms look at my dick but the thing is is that you have to you have to do it because you don't owe anybody any of that shit and that's just say you know no it's not happening that way quit doing that well and here's the thing is no means no uh and at that point they won't stop okay so she follows over the it's been put out nicely and it's been very mean we've done it all okay so at that point in time here's the deal uh if they're going to specific parties or places if they're doing it to you okay to others you're not the only one not saying that you guys aren't super sexy and aren't you know that maybe they are just because you guys are super sexy not if you are hey no but harassment is harassment and and the thing is is if they're going to a club if they're on a page wait waiting for the private message thing to come popping a club, if they're on a page, wait, wait for the private message thing to come popping up right now. If they're on a page, whatever, let the admins know, let the people know, uh, because if they're doing it to you, they're doing it to other people. And the thing is, is that at that point in time, the owners of the clubs, the groups, uh, and everything else have a responsibility to weed douchebags twat waffles and dickheads out of the lifestyle I'm making all kinds of this episode is getting all kinds of fans isn't it my god he's lost his fucking mind
Speaker3: he's an asshole sweet they
Speaker1: finally found the truth we'll get a name of that the crazy asshole no I'm just I think it's just I think some of this stuff is they're legitimate questions and they're legitimate concerns I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know. the crazy asshole no i'm just i i think it's just i think some of this stuff is they're legitimate questions and they're legitimate concerns okay but it's it's like i think in the lifestyle so many times we have this desire to be mature and to kind of dance around things we want to be nice right we want to be nice but the reality is there's a lot
Speaker1: of shit in the lifestyle that's pretty fucking underhanded and shitty okay and so the thing is is that sometimes you just you have to you have to put a stop to it you have to because here's the deal if you don't put a stop to it it's gonna happen to somebody else and it's just gonna perpetuate it's going to grow and grow and grow uh okay all right sweet send me a private message on that uh yeah definitely if yeah if they if they're part of casbah uh part of the crazy guys we definitely want to know because i want to put a stop to that all everybody's contact 10 more minutes okay awesome sweet yeah and the phones are going crazy here kids oh boy all right yeah so definitely let us know because here's the thing we we do want to know we want to make sure that that uh people like that are not going to be in here more and more and more uh okay so yeah and you know what that's the other nice things yeah most people in the lifestyle are pretty, most people are pretty nice. You know, we talk about the extremes. No, no, you just came out as a blatant asshole on that one. Well, would you do it different? No. Well, let me tear you under the bus. I do do it different because I just ignore it. Or I just kind of, I do just ignore it. I don't even tell them to quit it. Well, I mean, look, you do to a point, but there has been points where I've stepped in. Some people can't get the hint. You know, and that's the thing. Look, most people are pretty nice, you know. Hey, I should have asked this. Hey a band i are just kidding no i mean most people are most people are pretty nice in lifestyle it's just one of those things that that you have to take and you have to you have to take an honest approach about some of this stuff and the thing is is, is I know that, you know, there's a lot of shows out there that are geared towards all the titillating, fun sex stories. And we have a lot of fun sex stories. And hopefully after Crazy Winter Nights this weekend, we'll have some more. But there's other things that have to be discussed in Lifestyle too. I mean, if you truly want to make it, if you truly want to make it better, you sometimes have to, like, tackle the stuff that sucks. You know, it's like cleaning. You know, nobody really likes to clean up the you know the the underwear with the shit stain in it but you know the the bathroom ain't gonna smell any better till you pick it up and wash it what kind of a fucking analogy you're using on that i don't know i do something it's the only one that popped in my brain oh stop it dog poop't know. What do you want? I'm just trying to get some of the people to relate to. Just cleaning in general. No one likes it. It sucks ass. Not all of them. Sometimes cleaning is fun. You put on the right music. Wear the right outfit. Sing and dance. A little mop and a little feather duster. Get a little apron and a feather duster. We can make a party out of it. How do you know that's what I wear when I clean the house when you're at home? Nice thing and dance around. Hey look man you know cleaning can be fun.
Speaker2: You just get
Speaker1: you just vacuum like a weapon. I dressed up like Rambo
Speaker2: one time
Speaker1: around the house cleaning.
Speaker3: Oh my god.
Speaker1: That was awesome. I put on like a do-rag and the dogs just didn't know what the fuck was going on. I was like jumping around the room.
Speaker2: I didn't realize.
Speaker1: I wasn't even drinking that day.
Speaker2: Just saying. Yeah. Okay.
Speaker1: All right. Oh shit. Fire. And about to set the studio on fire at Casbah. So that's a pretty good place to wrap it up. On a notebook. Oh, shit. Wow. Oh, my God. That's funny. All right. So, again, a huge shout out to our sponsor. Hey, do you need some more slide in your glide? Yeah, we all do. If you just need a little more loof. I don't know what i was gonna say there loof i meant to say swoosh anyways if you're drying you need to be wetter visit our friends at spunk lube www.spunklube.com they're friends of the show they're friends of ours so you've always got a friend at spunk lube uh every time in the coupon code put casbah k-a-s-b-h andH, and get your 10% discount, spunklube.com. And remember, if you'd like the opportunity to advertise your business, this space here, please let us, the marketing department at CASBA know at crazy, K-R-A-Z-Y dot CASBA, K-A-S-B-H, and someone will contact you today. At gmail.com. At gmail.com. That's Someone will contact you today. All right. You're going to want to make sure you go visit our YouTube channel and subscribe. We've got some exciting new features getting ready to roll out, and you're going to want to be a part of those. So go to www.youtube.com backslash C backslash Kazbah, K-A-S-B-H. And if you like what you hear, visit our Patreon, www.patreon.com backslash crazy K R A Z Y Kazba K S B H. And you can also follow us on Twitter. That'd be at truth crazy. You can follow us on Instagram at crazy K R A Z Y underscore Kazba K S B H. don't forget to sign up on our youtube or on our facebook page which would be crazy truth and you can always send us emails we love your emails at crazy k-r-a-z-y dot casbah k-a-s-b-h at gmail.com and don't forget everybody needs some crazy truth merch that's right we got merchandise. Go to teespring.com backslash stores backslash crazy, K-R-A-Z-Y hyphen truth. All right. And on that, all right, doing it the only way I know how.
Speaker3: You're adorable.
Speaker2: Wow.
Speaker1: And the only way I want to. Kazma Style, out.
Speaker2: Bye.