Krazy Truth #247 Still having new experiences!!!

Transcript

Speaker1: Hey kids, the program you're about to listen to contains some adult situations, adult language, themes, and other adult topics. If you're easily offended, this show's not for you. Hey you crazy motherfuckers, welcome back to another edition of Crazy Truth. I'm your host with the most, I'm Cole. Apparently with the frizzy hair. I'm here with the lovely, lovely and not wearing a dildo or vibrator, Miss Amanda. Hey, am I supposed to? I don't know. Sometimes you do. I wear a vibrator? Yeah. Your necklace. Oh, yeah. No, I don't. You've forgotten? Oh, no. It's become almost a daily thing at work. Awesome. There you go. Just like trying like trying to fuck with the new guys okay we'll talk about that a little bit as the show gets going okay so uh we're here we're live we're kicking ass we're doing all those sorts of things we're doing those things that we do that voodoo we do uh for those of you following along at home that would be like me except i'm'm in a studio. But it's in my home, and I'm following along. This is Season 6, Episode 247.
Speaker2: Niner.
Speaker1: I can't wait until we get a niner again. I like saying niners. Anyways, yeah, so welcome. Good day, and welcome to Season 6. A quick shout-out to our sponsors.
Speaker2: Sores. Sores.
Speaker1: No, nobody has Sores. But don't say Sores in the lifestyle. That's not a winning thing. Hey, let's talk about sores, everybody. Ew. Pussy. ASNLifestyleMagazine.com. Do you want to know what's going on in the adult world, which we're getting ready to really enter soon, as well as lifestyle? Of course you do. Then you need to be making it a habit each and every month to read ASNLifestyleMagazcom by the way don't forget it's time for their awards again we sure would like to win some because well we like to win shit you can actually go to asn awards asnlifestyleawards.com you have to nominate people those with the most nominations move on to the final voting round you need to nom nominate us for Crazy Winter Nights, for convention. You need to nominate us for Best Supporting Business with Full Swap Radio and with Best Apparel Business with Full Swap Shop. And you can even nominate us, this crazy truth thing that we do, for Most Creative Content Creator. No, it's podcast. Or podcast, yeah. So we sure would like your votes. We'd love your love. I forgot MyWorksFirewall doesn't like ASNX. I shouldn't imagine that. So fight through that, though, and Nominus. Get us on to the next round. A lot of the porn folks win, and we want to show the porn people that uh this the lifestyle can kick everybody's ass uh we we we got we we didn't win last year and i want i won another trophy well we got a trophy we won a humanitarian award but we won another trophy i'm a greedy motherfucker anywho uh yeah so that being said so asn lifestyle magazine also nightcacom, as seen on Shark Tank. We're proud to be associated with nightcaps. The Drink Spike Prevention Scrunchie. You know what? There's some parties going on this weekend. If you don't have one, you should have. Anyways, so nightcaps.com. That's for fun. Well, it's the truth. Don't leave the safety of yourself or someone you love up to anybody else or anybody with a pill that can root for you get a nightcap.com and don't forget to use promo code nightcap10 slash or excuse me hyphen casbah and can get a discount and finally we all love to fuck yep sure do fucking is fun swimming in a pool of bodily fluids afterwards not fun no more nobody likes to wet stop eliminate the wet spot get your very own no more wet spot blanket today that's right it's easily washable dryable crinkle free swimming free no more wet spots.com and make sure you use full swap in the promo code and get your 10 discount i don't believe that we've got one you're a squirter, but we have one because I like to fuck people that are squirters, apparently. And so we've got one.
Speaker3: I have squirters.
Speaker1: You do squirters, too. And it's so much easier to be able to put a blanket down. You can easily just clean up versus laying towels out there.
Speaker3: Crinkle-free?
Speaker2: Yeah.
Speaker3: What's crinkle-free?
Speaker1: It doesn't make noise. There's some that make all the... There's some that are... Because you can do it on either side.
Speaker2: I'm like...
Speaker1: So there's some of them that are like...
Speaker3: Oh, like a dog toy. No, well, like, make all the... There's some that are... Because you can do it on either side. I'm like... So there's some of them that are, like... Oh, like a dog toy.
Speaker1: No, well, like a dog toy or fucking on a bunch... Like, take a whole bunch of Walmart bags and fuck on them. You won't get a... They won't... You won't have a wet spot, but you're going to sound like you're fucking...
Speaker2: On a plastic bag.
Speaker1: A homeless person pumping fucking the sidewalk. So, yeah, don't do that.
Speaker2: Oh, wet.
Speaker1: I'm just saying. It is what it is. So, no more wet spots. So check them out today great great products great folks great folks we had a lot of people we we moved a lot of no more wet spot blankets at kwan in fact 32 of them found new homes at crazy water nights so you know that means a lot of people were using them trying them fucking, and were satisfied customers. And there was a whole lot of dry bottoms to sleep in later that night. The way the staff loved us. Hey, this mattress isn't squishy. That's the other rink crinkly sound. The sound of crunchy sheets the next morning. Like a fucking pre-teen sock on the floor. Crunch. What? How would you know any of that? How would I know any of that? Well, because that one morning after the one hotel party, and you were pissed at me because we had slept, we made wet spots. You didn't stay in one spot. No, we didn't. We fucked here and then switched angles you know what geometry became important during sex because we switched positions and angles and we managed to find a way to goob the entire bed we basically put a layer of fucking cooter juice on the entire bed that should be a shirt right there cooter You know, even if I were to move all throughout the bed, you wouldn't notice. No. Because it stays all nice and neat. Hey, it was not a snail trail. It was a puddle. Maybe because I put into the rhythm of it so nothing gets all wrinkly. Hey, you know what? We put it into the rhythm of it and it squirted everyone. It splashed around like kids in a puddle. Beep. It's fucking awesome. You know, it's just. Oh, I meant to bring that monkey in here. Damn it. There's nothing. Well, text your son to bring it in. There's nothing better than a spraying of cooter juices. That's what I'm going to call it that. Oh, see, Bree has it right. Steve always wants to fuck on my side of the bed, and then I get stuck in the wet spot. The blanket is worth it. Yeah. Well, Amanda got mad at me because we did. We managed. She's like, what side of the bed did you use? I'm like, well, kind of all of it. Oops. So, yeah. No, when I got in, I went, oh. It made it for a horrible night because, you know what? I was hugging the edge of the bed. You know what? If you ever owned a water bed and the heaters went out and you can't get warm or remove a new spot, it's a cold spot. That's what it's like if your bed's filled with cooter juices. It just gets cold. Cold and crunchy the next morning. Excuse me, is that a layer of glaze? Ew. Anyways, so there you go. That was the most fun we've ever had. Just talking about the fucking sponsors and it was so charge extra for that one.
Speaker3: Talking about what? Well, you know, seriously. Because I'm going to
Speaker1: tell me needs to sell shirts that say no more cooter juices. Well, have that be one of your fucking topics today. Cooter juices? No, squirting. How do you? Because not everybody does it. And I don't like to sleep in that crap. It's not crap. That's shitting. When I get into this discussion about, is it piss? You don't have to be sneaking in here. Our lab tech's sneaking in with some shit. Good job. Way to go. Keep up the good work. Take a no more wet spot blanket for yourself. Don't make a mess. Wash it, wash it, people.
Speaker2: There you go.
Speaker1: So I want to real quick, for those of you, look, if you are not, if you have not tuned into our YouTube channel and subscribed yet, for the love of fuck, please do. Anyways. Wow.
Speaker3: Well, no, here's the thing. Tell us how you really feel.
Speaker1: Well, here's the thing. Here's the deal. This is one of the things. We have over 100,000 followers and the biggest fucking total Thank you. Uh, anyways, well, no, here's how you really, well, here's the thing. Here's the deal. This is one of the things we have over a hundred thousand followers and the biggest fucking total fucking pussy ass weak spot of my entire marketing fucking plan is our fucking YouTube channel. Okay. We have 600, we have 624 YouTube followers and we have a hundred thousand other followers. I need YouTube subscribers. You can see Miss Amanda. She jacks off on there and it's all kinds of cool shit. If they're not subscribed, they don't know. Shut up. They don't know. Like it allows it. She actually, if you're just listening and you haven't subscribed to it yet, she actually sits here in fucking lingerie and flicks her clit the entire time under the table. Normally she pulls her finger up and it's dripping. It's just like she's been fucking playing in fucking whipped cream and fucking bad decisions. Anyways. Yeah, there you go. See, there you go. It's playing. Okay, now touch your cooter. He looked at me and he goes, are you wearing that? I'm like, do you want me to wear something? No, I just want... it's what i wore to work except i changed my pants which we're gonna talk about her work yeah well that's and we'll talk about why you're trying to do yoga at work again okay so i want to give a huge shout out this is this okay one of the coolest things is that uh uh we have folks that get us think of us when they're out traveling. This comes from the Dominican Republican.
Speaker3: Or the Dominican Republic.
Speaker1: Yeah, exactly. That too. We're going to see. We're going to see a bad decision. This is a monkey flipping it off, grabbing his nutsack. And so it's nice to know that when people go on vacation, they see something and they go, fuck, Cole needs that.
Speaker3: Matt thought about it.
Speaker1: Matt thought about it.
Speaker3: He talked to me at Grand Island and he goes, okay, so I got this monkey and he's flipping off. Then he goes, but I don't know if I can give it to Cole. And I said, why? And he goes, because it's grabbing its penis. And I said, yes, you can give it to Cole. Cole's usually grabbing his penis, too. So it works out perfectly.
Speaker2: So that is a welcome part.
Speaker4: Now, this is like good juju in the studio.
Speaker2: So that's my little buddy.
Speaker1: We'll have to put him somewhere. We're going to call him Spanky.
Speaker2: Spanky.
Speaker1: Spank the monkey. If it was a chicken, we'd name him Chokey.
Speaker2: Okay.
Speaker3: Whipped cream and bad decisions. I ate on my whipped cream today.
Speaker1: Yeah, but we'll put that on the shirt, too. We're going to put Cooter juices, whipped cream and bad decisions. I ate on my whipped cream today. Yeah, but we'll put that on the shirt, too. We're going to put Cooter juices, whipped cream and bad decisions. I got all kinds of fucking new material coming out. Okay, so got all kinds of shit. Now, okay, before we get on the regular show, I'm going to take this out, too, because I've been dying to fucking be a dick all fucking day long, and I have fought the fucking urge all day long and i cannot fight the urge anymore i can't stop it i can't slow it down i i'm going to edit it as best as i fucking can but i'm just gonna throw this out here when you're deciding on a place to go to events to and with and for if they don't have a return policy they're sketchy as fuck just saying and when they're sketchy as fuck they do sketchy as fuck things and people that sign up and give them money get fucked but not in the good way just saying so just thought I'd put that in there. God, I guess. I've been waiting all fucking day long. Because I screenshot and sent that to you today. You sure did. It made my fucking day. So, anybody who, now there's more people that maybe for their budget wasn't going to be able to go to the birthday bash and some other events. Now, they freed up so you can come to our birthday bash. Well, their time freed up. Yeah, you'll be glad you did. Maybe not necessarily their money because they don't get refunds. Yeah, but I am dead serious. If you really want to know, message him. He'll tell you all about it. Look, here's the reality of it. I'll say it once. I'll say it again. Any fucking place that's worth a shit will always offer a form of a refund because life fucking happens. Yes, we all have a cutoff date. Ours is usually a week or two weeks before the event is a cutoff date. Because we need a number count. For number counts. But any place that's worth a shit always is willing to offer a refund. And if it's their fucking fault, if it's my fault something happens and you pay me money for one of my events it's my fault you're definitely getting your money back just saying so there you go food for that now onward now that was fun i feel so much fucking better apparently wow i've been on the phone with my lawyer all day today. Like four different times I was talking to our lawyer. So I was like, you know what? I think I can say this today.
Speaker2: Yay. Anywho. Okay.
Speaker1: I'm going to suck on this. So let's talk about you starting to do yoga at work again, shall we?
Speaker3: I'm not doing yoga at work.
Speaker1: You used to do yoga at work.
Speaker3: I do yoga at home.
Speaker1: That's because I dropped you off and you started work a half hour before me. So I had a half hour to do yoga before I had to clock in. Yep. That was the only time I did yoga. Right. And then when the boy toy. Okay, occasionally I go into the conference room and do a little, you know, small. Okay, well, there's that. You set the pattern so people work. It wasn't unusual for you to go into the office to go do. Yoga. Yoga. Okay. And then boy, toy left. Or meditate, whatever. Yeah, meditate, ground, suck a dick, take some penis, whatever the case may be. Let's just say that at her work someday when she quits her job, when her first kind of big-time porn stuff comes out and they they realize it's actually true That she left for porn It's going to be so funny when they go Wait a minute Yoga means Oh my god She was taking dick at work But she had stopped doing that for a while Because he left He left, you didn't need to And I haven't really I mean you're still fucking him you didn't stop doing him you stopped doing him work well not as often it would look awkward if he showed up at your works and he doesn't work there anymore yeah just for you guys to go off into a room somewhere yeah i wonder what's going on there yoga anywho but so this week it was monday right because this is when yes it was monday you were was it yesterday no nope it was monday because it well maybe it was i don't know it doesn't matter i don't remember you were walking past uh hr no i'd already passed hr i was walking past this other gal's cube because she's been on maternity leave and all this work has been piling up. So I was looking to see how much was on her desk because she comes back this week. Uh-huh. Yep. And I turn and there's somebody filling out an employee packet and I had to do a double take. I'm like, huh. Enough that I went and I told the, I was on my way to cover the switchboard operator for her break. and i went oh my gosh there's a really handsome man in there with dreads i mean his they smell good and i'm like wow i said i even had to look twice and she's like really this old 60 63 year old lady going, huh?
Speaker3: And so, guess who's hoping for, praying for the new hires?
Speaker2: So then when you say that the fucking necklace is a daily occurrence, if you can replace the necklace with like eight inches of dick.
Speaker1: Oh, I'd do both. I'd do both. Fucking whore. I love it. Not whore. Slip. Okay, so it was becoming a thing to use that little vibrator daily. Right. You know, at first it was like, go to the bathroom. Oh, you know, get off. A couple of times, the one girl that shows up just as early is in her office, i'm sitting there and mike you're not even going to the bathroom now fucking wow there we go okay so that's awesome so so holy shit so yeah so uh miss a man is going to keep just getting more and more in shape and and it's and even though we have a healthy caspo page and you do are doing for you and for your healthy you, the reality of it is it's because she's getting fucked. So, yeah. Hey, here's for the new hires. Guess who's going to be? I'll take him to lunch. Hi. No, we don't do that. Plus, I don't take a lunch. I would. I'll take a lunch. Well, I guess I would start, wouldn't you? It's the car business, for fuck's sakes. You need to go back to old school ways. You don't know how long I'm going to be in the car business. You're right, I don't, but I do know this. Go back to the old school ways. Fucking everybody and drinking and doing drugs. There you go. Fucking lines of Coke on the table, fucking bottle whiskey in your desk, and fucking whatever moves. Come here come here and let's dicker you know what show the fucking show the young pups show the young pups be like hi i'm miss amanda i'm here to miss amanda has a phone interview tomorrow yeah wait till after miami then we'll see how the hell wherever you're at goes just say do you realize age-wise in in Miami I'm going to throw this out here real quick Because this is really funny I want to hear it So you're lined up right now Right? I don't know You are You've got two Hall of Famers Two Adult Industry Industry Hall of Famers, legit. Men or women? Men. Okay. One Hall of Fame chick, I believe. That's the, okay. Okay. You've got, and then you've got two up-and-coming starlets that are both under 30 that you line up for and a couple of very, like three or four
Speaker3: very... She fucks her stepmom.
Speaker1: Very three or four currently very active at top of their game stars that are mid-30s or less.
Speaker3: How many are men and how many are women? Of guys. Really? Yeah. Yes. Yep. You know what? Your bed's going to be tired. And here's what's funny. This is absolutely funny. So, it takes place, like, the weekend of our anniversary. And I have a rule, and it's my rule, and I know it's my rule, that we don't play on our anniversary. Thank God it's on Sunday. Yeah, no, shit. Let me put it this way. I have a feeling after Miami, we're not going to be fucking on our anniversary. I would just lube up a lot. Honey, you're going to be using my leg at the same time. You can lick it and make it better. I'm going in and I don't even know. Yeah, so, no. Okay, so for those that really are trying to piece it together, we well you decided that we're taking the we had
Speaker1: talked about it before yeah this is wait a minute pause i pause i did not this is not like i forced her to make this leap or jump in any way shape no no no no we've been talking about it for a couple of years yeah but i just don't want to fucking every turn go you motherfuckers fucking trying and one her. And one of the guys, whenever they go to Exotica, they will video chat. And so I get to see who it is. Because it's a group of friends. They're really good friends. They've known each other for years. And we're going with your agent is a very, very trusted friend of ours. I have an agent. Who's all the way through. He's never seen me fuck, but I have an agent. Yes, he has. And so, but he's a very good friend of ours. And so, it is like the ultimate safe environment. You're getting to skip all the steps. Most people that were just trying to do this on their own the casting couch, damn it no shit so yeah we're going to be in the Exotica for some other stuff anyway so we're going to be at the Miami Exotica this year which is July 13th through the 16th and we're going to be at the New Jersey Exotica in November as well so here's the other thing if you're going to be at the exoticas and you want to get a chance to meet us or to meet you then you let us get us messages you can let us know and you can get a chance to meet to meet miss amanda we'll we'll set up times and stuff and if you want to like meet with us for other stuff for advertising sponsorships all that shit let us know, let us know. We're doing lots of meetings. But we will be at both the Exoticas, and we're really excited about them. Yes, I'm just flipping you shit. I know. It's just important that they understand that that's the ones that we don't want going on and killing Cole. He's so mean to her. He's like getting the lights. I really don't want to do don't want to do it so you're doing like symbols and stuff i mean i don't want to do it you can't make me oh shit that was hot as fuck this is not trafficking i swear to god no no i'm like going okay so we decided driving because it's way fucking cheaper than flying yeah way cheaper if i were to buy a plane ticket right now to miami it'd be like 127 yeah you wait till july it's like 500 yeah we like to drive anyway we like to drive so i'm like going oh what's along the way okay that goes through nashville chattanooga atlanta and all the way down i'm like going oh the mountains where could we go mountains. Where can we go? What can we see? How many days are you going to take it off for? Oh, my gosh. I don't know. Because, well, if we take the whole week, because you'll have to, it'll be, like, two days down and two days home and whatever. So it'll be a good time. I mean, it's going to be. I don't know, because I'm thinking, you know, you work Monday, take Tuesday off, because Monday will be a cutoff, and we all know it, if I'm still working there. And, you you drive down and you take your time and you know I'm like oh what's in Chattanooga because that's like halfway like oh there's this it's called like Ruby Falls or something like Ruby Cave or Ruby something because it had Ruby Tuesday no it's a cave with a waterfall that comes down and it's red i'm like oh i want to see that like a little bloody fall we stay in a cabin that'd be badass we can go down we can go to nashville see some shit there drive through the mountains take our time just stop and see my sister in atlanta but i don't know about that maybe hey you want to have to keep going. We've got to move. I've got other friends. We've got other friends we'd rather see in Tennessee. My sister isn't above everybody else. No, that's what I said. We've got other friends that we'll see also. Don't knock family down. I won't knock family. I'm just saying other people will see also. The ex is down there. That's all. I mean, we're not going to stay in any place too terribly long. We're in your sneakers. shit Cole has sneakers Anyways Fuck But yeah so you got to figure out how many days Yeah it's whatever it's going to be a good time We're going to be We should tell people too We're going to be in Houston In May In May the 20th and 21st So if you're in Houston. So I had to look up on a calendar going, when's Mother's Day? That must be the week before. Yeah, if you want to see us in Texas or you want to see us on the way down because we're going to drive to Houston and drive home, schedule time. So we'll meet with people. We'd love to meet people. So we're going to be in Houston Friday and Saturday, 20th and 21st i think it's friday saturday so we're gonna be all we're gonna be all over the place we're gonna be on the run plus our birthday bash this weekend so please buy tickets if you're close buy tickets to the fucking birthday bash please please we're gonna do a wedding at the birthday bash so we're gonna do a wedding first and then a birthday bash so there you please, my dick. I'm just kidding. We've got a lot of tickets. We don't have as many as I want. We have a lot of tickets, but we want to make sure. There's going to be cake. She'll be there. It's like when you do this time. She'll probably be fucking naked. Who fucking knows? I don't know. Is that even allowed? No, not really. But, I mean, it'll still be fun. It's going to be a good time. I know that much. It's going to be fun.
Speaker3: We always have a blast.
Speaker2: Yeah. I know we do.
Speaker3: And we're just going to just run amok. We're going to have fun. We're going to dance our ass off.
Speaker1: Just checking.
Speaker3: I mean, it's still there. It'll always be there.
Speaker1: I'm going to dance my gut off instead.
Speaker3: You can try. It burns calories.
Speaker1: I know other things that burn calories, too. It does. And I think you're're gonna be pretty boozy maybe we're working on it i'm down i've dropped weight i've started
Speaker3: we're not cleaning until four o'clock in the morning we're going back the next day i started
Speaker1: i dropped weight already well i gotta drop another fucking 80 pounds and i'll be did you see your
Speaker3: picture on your memories come up oh god no was it bad no it was when you got into like a size
Speaker1: I'll see fucking sexy. Did you see your picture on your memories come up? Oh, God, no. Was it bad? No, it was when you got into like a size 34 feet. Oh, when I dropped all that weight. When I was down to two. You went to 280 to 223 or some shit. To 223, yeah. That's what I'm trying to get back to. It'll make me look like I have more hair. You had to have the Batman shirt and stuff. Yeah, it'll make me look like I have more hair and my dick will be like 10 inches longer. I might be able to be in a porn at that point. No. We're working on it. I'm down like 13 pounds. Rock on. Yeah. Whatever. That's damn good. Shut the fuck up. I'm trying to do it so that I can fuck girls and not kill them. You have proven you can fuck and not kill them. I know, but I don't want to have to have waivers signed where it's like, hey...
Speaker3: Don't mind if I crush you?
Speaker1: Sign this waiver that if I fucking have a heart attack and die while I'm fucking you, you won't sue Amanda. Hey, sign this waiver if you break ribs. It was an accident. Hey, you know, I'm sorry you have to wear a snorkel so in case my fat curls around your head,
Speaker4: you can breathe.
Speaker3: Oh, shut the fuck up.
Speaker1: You know, that kind of shit. It's just little stuff.
Speaker3: Shut up.
Speaker1: We have waivers for everything.
Speaker2: Shut up.
Speaker1: There's some dudes that you need to have waivers with. If they're over certain ages, it's the hotter you get. We're going to have a fucking dude sign waivers. Some dude have a heart attack. Miss Amanda.
Speaker2: Maybe. Could happen. The last one. He's a cardiologist, too. And I'm like, do I need to have a waiver for you? He goes, no, I'm good. I said, well, I only see one for cholesterol, so I'm not going to keel over. Two of you with that. Fucking awesome. Hey, we each have each other's waivers. That's perfect. I'm hoping as I thin down, I won't fucking cramp up as often. That's what we're really hoping for. Because that's when somebody dies. I can be up on my shoulder. No, they get injured. No, I can be up, you know. But if I cramp and I, like, crumble, like, oh, it's just like, oh, shit, I'm sorry. I i just broke your fucking nose i apologize hold on let me stop that doesn't happen that way that's right because fat is cushy squeak squeak all right let's get on with the actual show we actually do stuff that we talked about stuff oh my god it's been a half hours babbling what the fuck is up with that shit? Hey, real quick, we'll do halftime.
Speaker3: So make sure you check out.
Speaker2: Why not?
Speaker1: Hey, make sure you check us out on fullswapradio.com. There's apps for that, capital F-S radio.
Speaker2: Radio's capitalized also.
Speaker1: That's for Android and for Apple.
Speaker2: We've got a whole bunch of new shows that just got added on this week. We've got a whole new lineup. We're changing times. It's really badass.
Speaker1: Check it out. During 2023, we will find a way to start doing some live shit on there also. But it's super exciting, so check it out. I have really had to talk to you about technology. Why would I do wrong this time? When you're searching for an app, you don't have to worry about capitalized letters. It's not case sensitive. I'll be there. Looky there. I learned something. I finally convinced him that you don't have to put a www anymore. I'm just happy to be here, kids. I was going to mention something, but what was it? Your vagina. No. You sure? Well, yeah, I'm sure, but it wasn't. Crap.
Speaker2: I don't know.
Speaker3: Okay, so let's... Well, we went out last weekend.
Speaker1: We did go out last weekend.
Speaker3: We went to Des Moines and met another couple.
Speaker1: Yeah, we did, and we had a fucking blast.
Speaker3: We had a blast. We were hanging out at a bar.
Speaker1: Yeah.
Speaker3: And it was a pretty yuppie bar.
Speaker1: And we'd only been there for like five minutes. And we felt extremely Oh fuck yeah Extremely And pink was a popular color Pink from when we were kids pink I was up against the wall And you and the other guy Over here, me and the lady And we're all just talking And I look up and this guy's walking towards the garbage can because there was a garbage can like five feet away right yeah he looks at me and his eyes just went and i'm looking i'm going i don't know who this is he's like waving and i'm like okay and he goes is you amanda and i'm like yeah he goes oh i'm so and so i'm like oh hey i can't hear any of this all of a sudden i just see somebody i don't recognize just like hugging her i'm like wow here we go he's hugging me he goes oh i'm so great i've actually got to meet you and call. And they're like, oh, hey. How was it? Five minutes. Five minutes in a bar. That was cool. I've never had anybody recognize me over you. Everybody recognizes you. It's just because they can see me easier because I'm taller. Right. They see the fucking, the lock starts to flail around Right Whatever yes So there you go Welcome to being a rock star I wouldn't go that far But it was really kind of It was nice that somebody And then shortly thereafter After he left Then these fucking yuppie bitches Started taking over the table and just coming over i was like we're all old enough to be your fucking parents you fucking cunt nugget you want to go don't they were being nice they were being they were just putting their stuff on the table and then they start drifting closer to us and we not in like a hey we want to join in can we fuck with you also way but like no and it wasn't like it was no they weren't bad it wasn't awkward but it it wasn't like uncomfortable it's awkward we finally went oh my god it's so loud in here how about we go we can hear each other talk it was awkward for our generation because our generation isn't fucking isn't fucking all like just on top of each other all the time where that generation is like hey personal space we don't know what it is and so but i mean then i'm wanting to crack jokes and you know i hadn't been drinking very much yet which is a good thing because the the looking for you know anybody with daddy issues comments would have started to flow out of my mouth i think they were flowing they were it just wasn't i hadn't ramped up to the volume to be heard over the music yet. We were laughing at the ones that were underage trying to get in. Oh, yeah. They had security at both doors. And busted them. Yeah. I mean, we were like, we need to go to a bar that's more our age group. Yeah. And we did. And it was a good time. But, yeah, that was fun. So, okay. So, what do you want to talk about? I talked what I wanted talked what i wanted to talk about great you shot your entire wad at minute 32 in the fucking show that's it no because i talked about wet spots too but you know you bitched about wet spots well okay there's that but you cut that off because not everybody scores not everybody can understand splish splash i was taking a bath but if there's significant other hooked up with one that did. We need to start editing our show so we put shit like that in so we can have sound effects like that. What, like splashing? Yeah. Or like that so it could have started like, wipe out, no. Something like that when we started talking about wet spots. It's like more, ew. That's fucking funny. Sounds like a little kid in a puddle. It's okay. Wet spots can be fun. Maybe if you're the one making them. Okay, here's what's funny. Here's's what's funny because of the experience at the hotel takeover a while back where me and said partner apparent accidentally not accidentally we were thorough in our use of the bag you have since then on another occasion when we went our separate waste play ask whether or not after you left went oh by the way does she squirt? You ask that because you're like and because of that. So basically I feel as if this is a lot like the whole booger thing when we drove in the car and you know here hold this and I wiped it in your hand you know 30 years ago and you now never hold your hand out blindly i feel like that that moment because of that one experience has now raised your awareness which is funny when you almost caused a girl to be waterboarded that didn't raise your awareness when you're sitting and have a girl pinned down and make another girl squirt so much that she needs a snorkel and almost waterboarder that doesn't stick with you but the one time when you have to sleep I don't know. and have a girl pin down and make another girl squirt so much that she needs a snorkel, an almost waterboarder, that doesn't stick with you. But the one time when you have to sleep in several wet spots, kind of a lake, a wet lake experience that stuck with you. If it's their bed and they knowingly squirt, they should be prepared. But it wasn't their bet. They would come prepared. Right. Right. By the way, we need to look because the one where you almost waterported the girl was outside. And I need to go check. Oh, you're talking about them. I want to see if the grass grew better there. If it's thicker or lesser. No, they had a carpet mat thingy down. I down. I forgot you were talking about that one. I thought you were talking about at the same campground but in a camper. Indoor-outdoor. An indoor-outdoor carpet. Ish. So it's easily hose off. It was like a bamboo thing. Yes, you could hose off. I know what we were going to talk about. What were we going to talk about? Um, Fluffy with the hair flip. We were talking about it on the way to Des Moines about... How do I say it without just totally giving away? I guess I have to give it away. No, you don't have to give it away. About it was a new experience for us. Okay, so I can help you with that. Well, no, I was just trying to give you a hint so you could take over. Yeah. Duh. Thanks. You always take over. I don't always take over. You can word it how you want to because you're going to. I'm not your fucking manager. I'm not telling you who's going to go in your vag. So don't act like that. No, somebody else is going to be taking over. No, so, okay. So here's one of the coolest parts about swinging, right? This is why we don't do a bunch of interview shows, just saying. But one of the coolest parts about swinging right this is why we don't do a bunch of interview shows just saying but one of the coolest parts about swinging so we've been in this thing for like 12 years now 11 11 and a half years 12 years whatever it's been many many moves a long long time many many dicks and pussies have since crossed these these hollowed halls of justice anyways so memories winners of memories anyway so what you figure out is truly you never stop learning in this and here's the thing so we're in a unique situation because we are at a point where we when we first started started out in lifestyle, a lot of people know this, you've heard it say before, we were only hardcore, hardcore, same room. Like, it wasn't even like in a house party, you go fuck over there, I go fuck over here. No, same room, right? I think, well, for the most part. For the most part. And as we progressed, as we've grown, we have leaps and bounds to the point where we're at now, which is, quite honestly, we have played together once, played with another couple one time in the last probably five years. And quite honestly, not only have we not played together, we haven't even played at the same time in probably three or four years. I mean, it's been a... No. One trip, we both, same room, same time.
Speaker3: You're talking about separately.
Speaker2: No, separately, we haven't played at the same time. Well, no, I understand. Even at our events, I'm working on doing something. You went and played, and then I was off playing, and you went. It's just very rare that we are playing at the same time, even, let alone playing together. so for us going back into the concept of playing together is almost like that's almost new to us again it's been that long so what is interesting though when we we didn't make a gradual jump from like playing same room to uh where it was're it was kind of like we just we went from same room to we dabbled in playing alone and then just boom we kind of went with it and went there we didn't some people have taken more steps in between those in between steps are a lot of new experiences a lot of other people have that we don't have we've got a shit ton experience we can talk about a lot of fucking things and a lot of emotional things and how to deal with a lot of shit but that's new there's some shit in there that we never had experience so one of the things that we had never experienced was we had never experienced the uh we had never we had never had an experience with where the we don't care if we play together.
Speaker4: It doesn't bother us to play together.
Speaker2: I mean, I don't know. It's been so long. It sounds hotter now than it's been so long. Yeah, it's only been like six months, eight months. Well, but I'm just saying it was just that one time. It's that hot experience again. Yeah.
Speaker1: But where we never had been with anywhere where the other couple did not play together and so what was what was interesting is that all of a sudden everything the comfort zone of knowing what to do because we've always done it because because we've always, you know, we've done it so often was thrown out the window. So here you have, here you have a very, very experienced couple, I mean, and us. And there was a degree of almost, I won't say newbie to it, but a little bit because we were completely out of our, not out of our comfort zone we didn't know we almost didn't know what to do it was like being new again well we were laughing because the three-hour drive we're going okay so we're playing out scenarios i'm like okay so we've never played together no we've never played at the same time in separate rooms right so when i get done do i text you and wait for you to get done and you text me and then we meet somewhere in the middle or when i get done do i just go up there but if i interrupt you i don't want to do that so how are we going to know when each other's done yep i mean we're sitting there going okay that's really fucking stupid that we're having to come up with these scenarios but we've never done it before so what do you do yeah we we were we were totally laughing about it because seriously we might go okay so we really haven't sat down and talked with them for a long period of time you know so when if we get a bad vibe do we just you know so i give you a signal somehow or you know grant there wasn't that but it wasn't it was super cool that that part they were super cool but it was just all these scenarios you're working out along the way and going okay so what are you gonna feel comfortable with what are you not gonna feel comfortable with how are you gonna do it you know it was it was actually funny because i i don't think that we have had an experience where it wasn't nerves but, but it was just like, well, fuck. We weren't in, we didn't feel we had control of the situation. You and I are used to having complete control of our situations. I didn't think it was out of control. No, but we've done it for so long. We haven't had to have a conversation like that for years. And it was kind funny because it's like well fuck and the realization of how much shit we don't know the irony of the whole thing is to sit here and go we've done this this long and and that realization of you don't ever have it all figured out yeah no you don't ever have here which is part of the fun i might add there there's a that's part of what that's part of what the swinging is so great, is that you're going out and doing new things and new people and all the rest. But wow. The other thing that I thought that it shows, though, it kind of takes you back to our roots? Crick, when you do this this shit because we did like when we first got into this shit talking it out talking out the scenarios trying to figure it out making sure we were on the same page to me that was something that it's like man if there could have been gopros going on in the room or in the in the car when we tell people like you have to when they're telling you something new you have to communicate it's you know it's like starting over we actually we do that we live that we don't just say that shit we actually but it started off we were laughing about it going we've never done that before huh we really have it and like well how does that work exactly and again, Cole showed his uber fucking shyness, too. The whole thing. Isn't that funny? And that's so fucking funny. Yes. Well, it is. Nobody believes that I'm shy and I showed my shyness. We were laughing about that, too. That I was like, then all of a sudden I'm like, da-do. Yeah, all of a sudden it's like, okay, what are you doing here, Cole? Hello, hello, is this thing on? Hello. Luckily, you two had it figured out. No, I just was, I was tired of it kind of dragging out. You're like, Cole, what are you doing? If you see Amanda at a party and she gets kind of tired of people dragging it out And wants to get going Then she tends to Strip I didn't strip You didn't strip this time No, I waited too I took my shoes off Yeah, no, but you usually do You have a history of that Of stripping? Yes, usually Right when people are trying to fucking get comfortable You're like, okay, great And I'm going to who wants to come downstairs with me. Woo! It's all good. And you're easy is what it amounts to. You kind of are. There's nothing wrong with being easy. That's what it's supposed to be. This isn't supposed to be, like, a hard thing. Well, it's supposed to be hard. Well, it's supposed to be hard. It's supposed to be hard. Patience. Patience is a huge virtue in life. Just fucking say it. Oh, you know what? That's something else we can talk about real quick. This is just a show. I don't know what I'm going to title this fucking thing. No, but it was like. Eclectic Thoughts of fucking Cold. Well, when we were driving and we were talking about this, I'm like, oh my gosh, we're going to have to bring this up on the podcast because we've never had to do this before. What else is it? You know, this is kind of crazy. It's new we're just it's i don't think we weren't overthinking it but we were trying to work out scenarios of how do you communicate when here's what's funny you can remember seeing us with experience doing that to understand how new people can overthink shit yeah because it'd be easy to get. What we should have done if we were smart was we should have just recorded the podcast in the car. Well done. Right then and there. It's what we should have done. We'll figure this out eventually. Well on the way home I'm like
Speaker3: why didn't we record this? Because you know it's our typical talks afterwards. Yeah.
Speaker1: That's the other thing we gotta talk about. Journey. The other journey. The dick journey. I love getting that fucking total blank. I have no idea what you're talking about. I don't know what I'm going to name this show
Speaker2: I don't know. or the other journey, the dick journey.
Speaker3: I love getting that fucking total blank fucking scenario. I have no idea what you're talking about.
Speaker1: I don't know if I'm going to name this show because it's just an athletic bit of thought. But this is an important part. So I want to give an update. This show is an update show.
Speaker2: That's what it is.
Speaker1: It's an update show. It's an update show.
Speaker2: Hit me.
Speaker1: So the thing is, ow, I like it. No, I'm not there. So the thing is, is that everybody knows I'm taking testosterone, right? Yes. So, and I had to have my, like, they had to check my levels. Right. Like a gas can. Is it full? Where are we at yet? It's not. So I started at 150. So basically I had the testosterone of, like, you know, a muskrat. after a year taking it, I'm all the way up to 385, which still would be, like, between 300 and 900, and 300 would be super low. So I'm still super low, but I'm higher than I was before. I'm high, but not high enough. I'm just saying. Anyway, so the thing is, is that they also then, in turn, checked this time around. You asked them to check it out. We had them check my estrogen because I cry at Hallmark movies. I'm an emotional fucking guy.
Speaker3: No, we have a friend that told us, hey, go get this checked out. You might really want to do it.
Speaker1: Right, so we do. So I go in, they do my blood draw for my testosterone, check it all out, great, whatever. And they also did check my estrogen. So your estrogen is, a guy's estrogen is supposed to be 30 to 50. No, it's like 30 to 55, 33 to 55. Something like that. 55 is the mark. That's the top end. So that's the high of the high mine was 59 so so it was slightly over it wasn't yeah but no but they don't want you running high the idea is not to be like redlining it the funny thing is is that when i went in to get tested for hormone therapy and i was already on estrogen mine was lower yeah so basically, so basically we figured out the problem. All this time, all this time, if I'd have had a vag instead of a dick, it would have been working awesome. Not quite how that works, but sure. So anyways, so the thing is, so now, which I've got to take one today. Today's one of my pill days. Now I'm taking an estrogen blocker as well. So what I think that means is I'm going to fuck you and not cry afterwards. No, I'm just kidding. No, I didn't cry before. I'm just saying. I mean, sometimes, but that was only the privacy of my own room. Oh, my God. So, but no, so hopefully what that means is, is that it should like make my dick just rock fucking stupid hard. It should make everything, once you get your hormones balanced, everything should start working the way it's supposed to. Zen. I'm pretty sure I'll become a Jedi. So, I mean, that's what I'm hoping for. Okay. Well, I mean like a penis Jedi.
Speaker2: I want you to choke. That'd be about like Yoda. I want you to choke on my lightsaber. It's kind of what I want to be able to.
Speaker3: Just once in my adult, older years. Is it spitting red, blue, or green?
Speaker1: I prefer not red or green, just saying. And just once, I want to be able to take and uh hold a girl up with my dick now just now wait a minute just hear me out on this for just a second okay just picture this for a second i want to be able if a girl has bent over i'm fucking from behind my dick is so fucking hard That I can fucking put it in Grab a hold of her hips Take her Step away from the chair Whatever she's on And go lift my hands And do like a nine count You know or an eight count One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi, four Mississippi, five Mississippi, six Mississippi, seven Mississippi, eight Mississippi. And she doesn't fall off. It doesn't go limp. It just holds it there. And then I carefully place my hand back on her and take her back to the thing. You need a lesson on gravity. Well, I'm just saying. That's what my dick's going to be. I'm not having her balance on top. Your dick would have to go through her throat To hold her up I'm not going to hold her up by her mouth She's got teeth That would be horrible Because if she panics and bites down No, from her vag All the way to her mouth You'd have to be able No, if you No, you don't They can balance plates on a fucking thing You can balance a basketball on your fingertip But that's the center of the plate. Their badge isn't the center of their body. We'll have to adjust her as we go a little bit. I'm not saying there's not some flaws with this. I mean, we're going to have to figure out center of balances and some shit like that. But I may have to tip back a little bit. I mean, she's going to need to hold still. This is like a motorcycle you can't be like squirming around in the back you gotta fucking hold still kind of tighten up a little bit you know just to scoach just just you kind of gotta have she's gonna need to have rigor mortis type thing not like actually rigor mortis but she's gonna have to act like she's gonna have to like once we get her balanced all out and everything she's going to have to act like... She's going to have to, like... Once we get her balanced all out and everything, she is going to have to, like...
Speaker3: Are you wanting to have her?
Speaker2: Huh? No!
Speaker1: Fuck no, that's gross.
Speaker2: It's horrible.
Speaker1: No, I just want her to hold her breath for just a second. Because we don't want her bouncing around. We don't want her to get hurt. We'll do it over padding and shit, so in case there's accidents. But we'll have a spotter, like gymnast. Will somebody go, ooh. I'm just... Just one time. I think that would be so cool. I don't want wind because we don't want tits swaying differently so there's like an odd fucking thing or she can't down she can't cough or some shit like that because, I mean, that'd be horrible, you know. But I want my, the key with this whole thing is it's really not about her. It's about my dick being hard enough and staying hard enough being like, like fucking, you know, like, yeah, that hard that it could.
Speaker2: I mean. That's not how it works. That's not how any of it works. I'm just saying. That's not how it works. Look, it's not big enough. Okay, if she's really in shape. Gravity takes over. Okay, wait a minute. I'll change it up a little bit. We'll do it this way. If she's strong enough. My dick's not big enough for two hands. Unless she's got really tiny hands, okay? If she's strong enough to hold herself with one hand up, I want my dick to be hard enough that she can grab a hold of my dick and hang on and just swing there for eight seconds. I don't want her actually swinging around because that will kind of hurt, but, you know, it helps if she had two hands, but her hands are going to be really small because my dick's not that big. When you get a hard-on, does it go clear through your asshole? asshole no i mean it doesn't stop where the skin is or does it keep going all the way through i think when it's super hard it goes out it doesn't go back when i don't get hard on it's going backwards no i'm only saying you god you're driving me fucking nuts today you have a dick you have someone hanging on it it's gonna fall not if it's hard no that's not how it works that's not how any of it works when you get up look when you get up in the morning and you've got to pee hard on you got to pee and you got to aim it down it doesn't want to go down you aim it a point you got to put 120 pounds and more on it and I don't want a moron on it, but that's what I'm saying. I want my dick so hard that I can hang on that 120 pounds or whatever will grip it. I want to be the super glued commercial like the dude with the hat in the 70s. But he's holding it. Right, but I want him to hold my dick. It's the same thing. I want him to hold my dick. we'll make sure they insert a metal rod all the way through it no make it to where it won't slip down that's what i'm saying i want so you want a metal rod no i'm saying i want so much testosterone that my dick is like a piece of metal that it's like it's like if superman had a boner if superman had a boner we could i don't i wanted to be able to nail hammer and nails without actually beating against the wall with nails but women are your kryptonite nurses i'm just saying that girl let's hate my my thing let's see my thing was is that's why i wanted inner because i thought well then one hand just hold on i think that's hurt but I think if it's just a soft warm grip of a vagina a pussy looks gently holding on that that wouldn't hurt her or me it would probably be better to stick it in her ass if she doesn't usually do it at all because it's gonna she's gonna grip on everything's be tighter, there'll be less movement, that would probably be better. It's a little further out, so that would probably be a little bit better all the way around. But I really hate to ask somebody that doesn't do anal, hey, do you mind letting me stick my dick in you when it's super hard and hang on. I won't move. Neither one of us need to move. Just sit there for a second. Eight seconds. Just saying. I think it could work. I mean, you know, I would love to see somebody else try it first. That's not how it works. Just, you know. Yeah, see, plan a trip to outer space then you have, you know, zero gravity because if you ever learn gravity Yes, there will be other waivers until she falls on her face and breaks her nose. Yes, she will need to sign a waiver. Because that's gravity. Well, she needs to be looking up. It's about balance somewhere. Look, you see people all the time.
Speaker1: Go watch one of the acrobatic shows and they fucking do this. Look at a stripper. Okay, better example. Look at a fucking stripper on a pole with shoes hanging on by her side and sticking straight outside like she's fucking flying.
Speaker3: Shut the fuck up.
Speaker1: Gravity counts there, too.
Speaker3: No, that's core muscles. Okay. So she needs some core muscles with my core dick. Would that not work? Just for shits and giggles. And not with me. Pick somebody up by their waist and have them tilted. Not on your dick. Just hold them and see where she goes where she goes okay you know now i'm going to try this at the birthday but you know this is going to happen you now now you know she should be allowed to at least have her legs wrapped around me from behind just for support purposes so she's no because if you expect your dick to hang if you expect your dick to them, then you just try holding on to hips with nothing around to see where she goes. So, like, they're, like, okay. Okay. Well, we'll have to try it. I mean, we'll have to have way... Or get a dildo and hold that and see where she goes. Well, we're going to... A glass one, because that's hard as a rock. So, why don't we use the stone one that you have that is a stone, that is a rock. We nothing. You can use it on somebody to see if you can hold them up with it.
Speaker2: Here's the first thing.
Speaker1: What we need to do is we need to find a willing, this is a key, sober and willing volunteer.
Speaker2: Sober.
Speaker1: You have to be sober when you sign the waiver and you have to be sober when you do it because if you're drunk, you'll be swaying around. So we need a willing somebody to sign the waiver. I'm on mission from God do you know you're out of time now you know what but I got magic running through my brain so I'm just saying this wand is going to be never the same again now if you're listening to this you know you're going to want to be on our YouTube channel why? because when we do this shit we're going to go live on youtube just saying all right with that being said hey let's give another shout out to our sponsors real quick asnlifestylemagazine.com three million readers can't be wrong make it a habit each and every day each and every month to read asn lifestyle magazine also nightcaps don't trust your safety take just anybody take keep yourself safe, and the people you love with the drink spike prevention scrunchie. Don't forget to put in the promo code NIGHTCAP10-CASBANK and get your 10% discount. And finally, no more WestBot. We've been down this fucking path. NoMoreWestBot.com. Full swap in the coupon promo code for your 10% discount. Get yours today because it's really good. So don't forget you can follow us on Twitter at TruthCrazy. Send us emails at crazy.kazba.com. You can check out our page. Make sure you do. Please go to crazykazba.com. See all the things cool things. And don't forget, sign up for Miss Amanda. You want to be, once you start doing the porn, you want to be on her OnlyFans. That would be Miss Amanda Kasbah on OnlyFans. So make sure you get that today. And finally, if you sign up, please, for the love of fuck, follow, subscribe to us on YouTube. Which is youtube.com backslash Kasbah, K-A-S-B-H. With that being said, kids, we're going to get the fuck out of here so I can start strengthening my dick. I need yoga. And she needs to do yoga. See if you don't know if yoga. You have a good bounce, bounce.
Speaker3: See how this is.
Speaker1: We're going to make such a great team.
Speaker2: God, just.
Speaker1: Anyways, doing it the only way I know how, the only way I want to, and the only way I ever fucking will. Chasma style.
Speaker2: Out. Bye.