Send us Fan MailOh the joy of warmer weather and bigger crowds. We are all excited to be out at the lake, the outdoor concert at the bar or packed in the bar with 100 of our closet Friends (hopefully with some benefits). Wait what is that smell? Your ass, your armpits, your cooter, your breath? These are all BAD Things! This is the remember to have the emergancy clean up kit and what to do to not get tagged the PigPen of the room. Also we talk to a Single male who is wanting to get more out of the meet and greets but is shy. How do you talk, how do you over come not knowing anyone! Look the reality is you have to talk to get laid it is just that simple. Courage, Cleaniness and perservernce are all on the table today!++GET YOUR FULL SWAP RADIO APP FOR BOTH APPLE OR ANDRIOD FS Radiohttp://www.asnlifestylemagazine.com http://www.fullswapshop.com http://www.nightcapit.kckb.st/Kasbhinc http://www.smuttyfy.com/register?asn Visit us at http://www.fullswapradio.comVisit us at : http://www.krazykasbh.comYouTube : http://www.youtube.com/KasbhSend us emails at [email protected]: @TruthKrazySupport the show (Support the show
Transcript
Speaker1: Hey kids, the program you're about to listen to contains some adult situations, adult language, themes, and other adult topics. If you're easily offended, this show's not for you. Hey you crazy motherfuckers, welcome back to another Crazy Truth. I'm your host with the most, I am Cole, and I'm here with the lovely, lovely, and slightly hack-a-lot Miss Amanda. Hey. And we are here to tantalate to the late and possibly phlegm all over you. Ew. Some people like that. It's not yuck-yums. You never know. Anyways, so we're here tonight to bring you a show of great intelligence and great importance that will help you along. Of course, already we're alive in front of our our secret secret facebook group cash bank shh don't tell the others and they're all defending miss amanda it's so funny they get to see the pre-show so that's like pre-com but not as sticky uh so they're already all defending miss amanda poor miss amanda and see it's cold in here at least i think's cold in here. My nipples say it's cold in here. Shelly says that she has a heater set at 90. Oh, my sweet mother of God. So she's with me on that. I don't know if I'd go with 90. Oh, the fuck you wouldn't, Jesus H. Christ. If we lived in the desert, you'd still have an electric blanket on and a heater on. Is that even vaguely a lie? No. No'd have a fan on because some of us don't want to die you want to know what it feels like to be me go buy a polar bear rug and wear that motherfucker around all summer then you'll figure out that's just me walking around it's fucking it is what it is man it's darn it it's because of my giant giant dick that's what it is. It's wrapped. No, it's what it is, man. Darn it. It's because of my giant, giant dick. That's what it is. It's wrapped around. No, it's not, okay. Anyway, so this is, we need to do the regular shit here first. We gotta get, what am I doing? Jesus Christ. We got people on, people saying hi. Talk. Wow. You guys heard it. She said to do it. Ha ha, fucker. Okay, so this is season five, episode 206. And Miss Amanda's getting her fucking high chair going. There we go, pumpkin. And so this is Episode 206. Quick shout-out to our sponsors. Why? Because, well, that's how we fucking don't lose the studio. Smart Swingers, what do they do? Do you know? You're busy, Florida, and I can already tell. No, I'm reading. Smart Sw they read well besides our shit they read asn lifestyle magazine.com that's right check it out hey guess what in short order we're gonna have announcements because i think we're gonna we'll see where we're at maybe if we got in this top five on some awards again this year uh so yeah check them out asn lifestyle magazine.com also uh you know you want all the fun of facebook without all the bullshit and the zuckerberg rules and crap and whatnot uh then join us over on smutty fi i said it right this time your titties and twats and dicks can fly on smutty fi uh check us out we've got our page over there crazy casbah we'd love to have you you can find all the notes on how to get there in the show notes down below i've been watching youtube videos and they point down below down below uh and also nightcaps hey now guess what we got some other shit we're going to talk about with nightcaps came in for those of you who don't have youtube what the fuck uh youtube nightcaps these are the scrunchies with safety here's one right in my hand look it's aunchie. I could put my hair back in a ponytail with it right now.
Speaker2:
Do that demonstrate? Yep.
Speaker1:
But you're at a bar. You're at a drink.
Speaker2:
You're out.
Speaker1:
And you're a chick. You don't need it to suck dick, but you want to make sure you protect yourself. Go ahead.
Speaker3:
Guys can use it too because guys can get roofie too.
Speaker2:
That's right.
Speaker1:
It's safety for everybody.
Speaker3:
Didn't we go through that earlier? You pull it out.
Speaker1:
It's like a tampon for your drink. No, I'm just kidding. And it goes over your drink there you go with the straw that's right now the ones we're showing right here are some of the very special ones will be on full swap shop starting tomorrow the special uh our special branded ones it's not a mood it's a lifestyle uh but check these out you can also see if you're a club or a group need to do bulk quantities check our notes below you can see how to order yours we're all about safety we're going to fight date rape we're going to make it go away working with nightcap.com check them out today so we're happy to have them here we're very excited about that finally don't forget to check us out on the radio station fullswapradio.com we're changing the way the world listens to lifestyle because we have an international bevy of shows I'll see you next time. Don't forget to check us out on the radio station, fullswapradio.com. We're changing the way the world listens to Lifestyle because we have an international bevy of shows on there. Check out some of the top shows. You can hear our show on Monday nights, our Mondays at 5 and again at 11 o'clock at night and Casper Rants on Tuesdays, plus 55 of the other top shows in the country, in the world, actually, because we're a worldwide group now. So you go with that what are you doing i'm up high i can see wow okay we're gonna give miss amanda a moment just to soak in sitting on a blanket i guess so she can see tall and deep and wide look at you go deep and i'm not sure I want to see deep and wide. Really? Are you sure? Well, no, not completely. So let's talk about, let's go on a tangent right off the bat. So first of all, we had, you know, we've been on tour again. And this week, last week, we got to be on tour in our home city. Yeah. It was fucking awesome to have like a 10-minute drive home. It was the greatest. Out here in lincoln doesn't happen very often oh fuck no it doesn't a hundred and i think they said 109 people with the head there it was awesome uh there's some pictures i got people giving us giving us stuff it was great time it was blast uh again cody and mary did a nice job putting that on and it was a lot of fun so and we ran amok you proved that you were a dickhead i didn't i was not a dickhead i did well yeah oh yeah well yeah somebody had balloons and so i showed i did someone had a balloon that was done up as a dick yes and you put it on your head so it made you a dickhead yeah yeah i was entertaining uh yeah and the barbell wasn't too bad good bar apparently they're gonna have those those there every other month or something So it was a good time We had a bunch of our cadets were there A bunch of our knights were there You were there I was there I think I was there You were there You were climbing on tall people again You were spider and monkey I did do that I can't see it Look around the next thing You were spider and monkey Someone got a picture of that Who got a picture of that And yes Apparently I tasted like pineapple Maybe it was his wife I don't know So yes I tasted like pineapple How did you taste like pineapple How did I taste like pineapple I'm like wait a minute Because we had a taste tester of coal you were kissing a few i was being friendly and and that's what i do i'm a friendly person and yeah and man if they'd had a back room there i think god even friendlier just saying yes no now here's the thing i gotta tell you uh this is enough boozing me whatever because i i said i was able to apparently apparently really really make uh two gals nights because because they maintain that that they'd never have a chance with me and all this stuff and i'm like what and so uh yeah so they you know they're like well can we at least get a pet? Can we at least get a kiss? And so I fucking did more than just a little fucking kiss. So I like to kiss. I'm a kisser. So apparently, rumor has it, I do a halfway decent job. I don't know. You can ask people. I kissed a girl. Like, that's anything new. And I liked it. Wait, this time or just another time in general just all the time i just like all the time yeah you you're warming up you're getting you know uh yeah so you got anything exciting you want to talk about you're like nope sure don't where are we going with this so and that's that's up to you if you want to talk about anything if you have anything exciting to talk about coming up or not
Speaker3:
coming up oh you could say i have a date on friday kind of like a blind date
Speaker1:
and we need a second car really a blind date I'll see date on Friday. Kind of like a blind date. And we need a second car. It's not really a blind date. Sort of. Kind of. Kind of. You know her, not him. Technically, I've never met him. I've heard about him. I've seen pictures. Olay. Yeah. So, yeah. Yep. So that's coming up. So that means Cole will be bored fucking senseless on Friday again. Wow, how does that continue to work out?
Speaker2:
I don't know.
Speaker3:
This blanket's, like, skeeching.
Speaker1:
Am I just going to drop you off at dinner, or what's going on?
Speaker2:
No.
Speaker1:
Are you going to ride your bike over there? No, that wrong boyfriend.
Speaker2:
My bad.
Speaker3:
Oh, my God.
Speaker1:
I didn't know. I'm just, look, I'm just trying to see.
Speaker3:
Why do you keep referring to me as my boyfriend? I don't have one.
Speaker1:
Well, the one was pedal power.
Speaker2:
I didn't know. So, you know.
Speaker1:
It's summertime. I thought maybe you just, you know.
Speaker2:
Yeah.
Speaker3:
You're such a dick.
Speaker1:
I'm not a dick. People want to know. People are curious. People are interested. I told him the bike guy has really lost a lot of interest. Since I've met new people. Wait, what? Really? I know. And Cody, what do you mean? Was it just the amazing bar shots? Wow. Okay. wow okay that just kind of hurts my feelings no she didn't say it was just i didn't know she said the shots were amazing and so was the staff at the bar that has nothing to do with you kissing well maybe she didn't want everybody to know that it was her that i kissed did you ever think about that there's only one of them hey thanks that's awesome way to put that out there great anyways ah fuck my life okay so here's the thing now a lot of you probably tuned in uh what nothing no what is it going keep going it was in my i'm my hair is sweating because i'm not going to have the fan on because it's hot in here bitch anyways uh so some people are tuned in because there was potential of raffling you off for a blowjob now here's the thing uh hey laura here's here's the thing did you say raffle and we might do a drawing for a blowjob we can't here's the we can't officially do uh drawing for sex that's called illegal. That's like prostitution. And we don't do that kind of stuff. So, but the more and more I thought about it, I'm like, here's the deal. You know, Warren Buffett, he's doing it again this year. Every year he does an auction for lunch with Buffett. Because everybody wants to talk to him because he's fucking really good at what he does right okay so the thing is is that you know we can off we can auction off a meal we can auction off a a event or date with with us now here's the reality of the situation let's just let's just let's put it out there exactly as we know how this is gonna go I don't know. with with us now here's the reality of the situation let's just let's just let's put it out there exactly as we know how this is going to go we're both going to be up for auction but we know who's not going to get a fucking single fucking bid okay right okay so we already know that so we'll take my dollar fifty that i raise and be it. Okay. You've already... That is so wrong. It's... Only because have you had a date going on a raffle? Yes, which is part of the reason why you have a date this weekend, which is really funny in the grand scheme of things. Okay, if you think so. Who knew? Okay. Yes, but yes, I have. But you weren't put up for a raffle for that time. So, here's the thing. So, I think we go the thing So I think we go for it Someone's calling you out on that Lion piece of shit People would have lunch with you Dinner with you, whatever with you They would do it for free But no one's going to bid for that thing For like Casper carries No one's going to bid on me me maybe look here's the thing if it comes down to if we do this you're gonna win we already know that we look i you're gonna you're you're gonna win so i i say we do it i say we put it out here now here's the rules with this work with travel well wait a minute here's the rules with this this does not mean there's no sex implied or what look whatever happens at the end if you hit it off that's that's whatever but this is just for dinner and if we do it like the buffet like buffet does his we do it like you can do up to like four people okay like you could bring they could bring like four people for the dinner part
Speaker2:
Thank you. and if we do it like the Buffett like Buffett does his we do it like you can do up to like four people okay like you could bring they could bring like four people for the dinner part because
Speaker1:
we're not raffling don't look like that we're not raffling off sex we're raffling off dinner at a date whatever or do you want to do it just an individual that they can raffle off it's an individual date with us well i doubt they'd want to share but you're not it's not about sex i didn't say it was about sex but attention wise okay so you want to do just individual probably I don't know.
Speaker3:
I don't know.
Speaker1:
I don't know. I don not, it's not about sex. I didn't say it was about sex, but attention-wise. Okay, so you want to do it just individual? Probably. Okay, do we want to do this right now? We're going to see right now. We can actually do three. We can do a date with you, a date with me, and a date with us. Okay. Okay. Well, we're going to have some, and I'm dead serious. And I'll tell you what everything will use it for casper cares casper cares is fucking tapped so and i got a shit time people need shit so i say we start it what what we where we start at buffett starts his at 25 000 i think that's a little crazy i don't think you're not warren buffett no i'm not i'm not gonna get anywhere close anyways. But just saying, what do you think a good starting bid should be? Where should the starting bid be?
Speaker3:
I have no idea.
Speaker1:
Today is the what? Today is the...
Speaker3:
26th.
Speaker1:
The 26th. So if we go to, say, the 15th of May.
Speaker2:
Okay.
Speaker1:
Right? Does that sound like a good number? I don't know. Sure. Okay, 15th of may okay right that sound like a good number i don't know sure okay 15th of may and they get to they get to people can send in your bids and starting bid needs to be what what should the starting bid be i have no i got people going at 20 a starting bid what what's our bet going to be in between us on who gets more?
Speaker2:
You're going to fucking blow me out of the water.
Speaker1:
It's not even going to be fucking close. It's not even going to be close.
Speaker2:
It's not. Why do you say that? Why do you say that? I don't know. Okay, so we're going to do this. I'm writing it down. Starting right now. You can send in your stuff. Bids will start. Say who it's for.
Speaker1:
Okay, so... okay so we're gonna do this we're doing it right i'm writing it down starting right now you can send in you can send in uh your stuff bids will start who it's for okay so it's gonna be twenty dollars each is the starting bid right yeah so when you send it in you have to tell us who you're bidding on okay okay so it you know 20 bucks is is the starting bid and i guess i can keep track so how can I keep track so people can see What it is Okay, alright Wow, no fucking way Okay, so Holy fucking shit Yeah, see So apparently we're already up to Proceed, the proceeds go to Casbah Cares To help other people in the community yeah so that's what we'll do with the the proceeds so uh okay well we're both already at a hundred dollars each wow okay so all right make sure you detail distance you will travel who pays for dinner wait wait the the dinner the dinner's on us the dinner's on us us. I'll pay for the dinner. I'll pay for the dinner. So what's max we'll go for distance? We'll go anywhere, but if it's over 100 miles, then we'll talk to you about how I'm paying on that shit. So, yeah. Meet in the middle. We'll meet in the middle. We'll figure it out. If it's over no we'll go 200 miles if it's over 200 miles away then we'll we'll meet in the middle somewhere or we'll we'll figure it out with you if it's over 200 miles so here's the thing dinner's on us whichever one you date whichever one you go on a date with um and we'll work out dates for when you get to have the dinner. You cook the dinner. You do not want me to cook the dinner. No, you don't. Unless you want to have cereal and sandwiches. Man, that fucking bologna was awesome. Well, that sounds horrible. No, it doesn't. Yeah, it does. Well, no, actually, it doesn't. So the bid right now is, so now we're at $100 for Miss Made at $100. I didn't have to spend the whole day talking about. No, but I'm just going to keep that. I got to have notes.
Speaker2:
There we go.
Speaker1:
All right, so there's the first thing. Wow, wasn't that hot and sexy? I still think you're going to beat me. Anyways, just saying. Just saying. So hot.
Speaker2:
Jesus.
Speaker1:
Again, the money is going to go to Casbah Cares. Because we have a whole bunch of people that have a whole bunch of needs so uh it's that time of year so okay so it is not that fucking hot dude oh my god you're sweaty yeah i am uh so we're up to 125 for coal so put it on that chair the thing is now no no it's okay i'm okay i's okay i don't need i'm fine give it here no i don't want to quit touching my shit man god let's give it here oh oh holy shit we okay so all right so 100 for both of us all right so now let's talk about this is funny that we're using the fan as an example here because one of the things questions that we had, well, actually, this wasn't a question. This is from the tours that we've been on so far. Okay. Because it's starting to get summertime, and it's starting to get fucking, you know, that type of thing. You can shut it off. I'll live, really. No, I don't want you to sweat to death. It's disgusting. But we've seen this because as summertime comes, and this is something that always comes up, you know, especially in meet-and-greet situations and whatever, this is like a yearly review that we do.
Speaker2:
Okay. Okay.
Speaker1:
Because when a bunch of people get packed into a bar and it's warm and sweaty out, the smell of excitement can be rather potent. So, again, well, no, look, seriously. I'll tell you what. We were actually, here's what's really funny. What made me think of this was somebody that was not with the group when we were at Des Moines. They were not with our group. Okay. Okay. But they were over when I was waiting in line at the bar to get a drink. And it is, it just, it hit me. And I'm like, we need to talk about this to get on the show. I mean, it literally hit was a chick standing there we're up to 125 for both of us there was a chick standing there um she had on like a cute little halter top thingy and when she was like raising her arm to fucking get the bartender's attention it was right by my snout and it was just like i just got fucking bludgeoned over the head with the smell of and so i'm like oh my god and again she was not with our group but i'm like this is the things that are these are the things that are like the worst fears in the world if you're in the lifestyle right or it should be because here's the deal what we're finding with all these meet greets have been on tour is people are fucking friendly like rock on friendly like we're really getting to know people we're really having a good time we're actually talking to people and there are people going and hooking up afterwards kick-ass rock on so it's the reminder session of what should you carry in your little bag of tricks to help make sure that when the adventure starts they don't feel like that they're fucking hooking up with Bigfoot.
Speaker2:
Seriously.
Speaker1:
Seriously.
Speaker2:
Why?
Speaker1:
It's God's honest truth. Look, it's summertime. People have forgotten what this is all about. Having your emergency stank kit with you at all the time is really fucking important. Okay. Do you want to jump in with any of this stuff? No, I'm listening kind of appalled, but sure. Okay, do you want to talk about what you take with you? Oh, my God. I have this little travel thing of deodorant, it's like real tiny and it sticks in my bag but i also have perfume i also have baby wipes i've got lube condoms what else do i carry i don't think we need lube to get to the point of quick doubt yourself in lube if they just slide past your body they'll never know if you smell or not No, yes I also have gum, mints That's for your breath Shut it Wait, you mean seriously? I thought that's what the lube was for No wonder my teeth were so slick all the time Yeah, no, yes, okay What? You're just No, you're just killing me You're just like, I mean yes, okay. Apparently I'm not helping with that. No, you're just killing me. You're just like, I mean, this is... What is your worst fear in the world? God's honest truth. What is your number one worst fear? When you're going to hook up with somebody.
Speaker3:
I was going to say, do you want to clarify? Because it'd actually be like snakes or some shit.
Speaker1:
There you go. That's what we're talking about. god nobody knows on crazy truth i learned a lot i learned that miss amanda's afraid of snakes i don't know why she doesn't have any guys ask her out anymore weird as fucking thing yes what is your worst fear other than snakes or spiders in sexual now if, if snakes are still your worst fear when you're fucking, feel free to share that, I guess. But what is your worst fucking fear? God, we're going to start doing these on fucking Thursdays. My worst fear is actually bad breath, actually. What? I know. Seriously? Yeah. The last couple years when we do a show on this, that has never been your top fear, but okay. That's your number one fear. Okay. I know what you're getting at. You're trying to just... Really? You're just dragging it out to get there. You're just torturing my ass, but sure, that's all right. Well, I know what the answer should be. What? No. No, there's not a right or wrong answer. Okay, meeting people, yes. Terrifying my breath's stinking, okay? Yes. That is a legitimate thing. You can get food stuck, and it just reeks for... How long exactly? How long is that? A long time. Okay, just checking. Yes, you can. Yes, absolutely. Gum. But then, then okay when you get down to sex yes terrified of it stinking in fact i will stop somebody and go it has been sweaty cooter i don't care sweaty cooter i told you yes sweaty sweaty cooter it's a thing and it's it's well and it's not just sweaty sweaty you know swamp ass look we live in a different world than when we first started swinging this is part why this is such a big deal because think about this for a minute when we first started swinging 11 years ago how many times you hear about people eating ass seriously that was like not really a thing yet of people just chomping away num at least not openly we were at a club one time early on and all of a sudden this guy licked my ass and it caught me completely off guard i'm like it did and that was really funny but now that's like a thing yeah so it's like you would think that would just go, like, even with just having one nut because one side sweats more than the other, obviously. Not really, but kind of. It's, like, that's my worst thing. The last thing I want to do is have a girl, like, want to give me a blowjob, start to give me a blowjob, and then throw up all over my penis because, yeah, because it just is swampy that that's just like that's my worst fear in the world so so yes but i'm right there with your breath first one time at a party a long time ago i'm trying to think if you were with somebody i don't remember oh god i went to go give a guy a blowjob in our room and he and it was like sweaty cooter and i'm like i didn't know a guy smelled that way it's me but it's because he'd fuck somebody else earlier must have which which this is the other this is the other thing with this kids especially if you're new and you're like this is the first time like because let's face it there are events where you may fuck more than one person. It happens. Those are called gas nights. Anyways, cleaning yourself off between times is a big deal. Now, and I don't know. I'm just going to go off of what you've said and other women have said before also. Cleaning yourself after you use a condom is a good thing too. the before then it because it can be latex latex yeah so it's just so a little cleaning goes a long way body spray leaves got yeah body spray just remember you're moving and shaking you're dancing you're having fun you're doing all this shit right and then you're gonna get naked and you know roll around with people you know there's nothing sexy about rolling around and puke there's just not so i mean like this is a this is like a huge thing plus this builds on to the next part of this whole thing which is is overall confidence i i look i can tell you from when i sold cars when it's hot when it would be like 100 degrees you know right and it's like 110 on a car lot and i'm a big guy so and you're out and you're trying to sell cars all day long right you're on the hot and seeing you're sweating and you're fucking you've got swamp ass and fucking you're you've soaked through like six shirts you just fucking gross there's nothing worse than when you jump into a car with somebody to do a demo drive and you can just smell the fucking act all over yourself right you're totally your total confidence your total comfort level because then the whole time i'm like trying to work a deal keep my i got got like t-rex arms because i'm trying to keep my fucking pits down and shit and and you're confident all that shit just becomes like it totally fucks with your confidence level so the thing is the reason we're talking about this if you are to meet and greet and you're not comfortable with you don't feel clean and fresh don't they have douche commercials for this clean and fresh type shit you're not gonna take that with you and do it well no but you know what i'm saying if you don't feel clean and fresh you're probably not gonna want to walk up and introduce yourself and really talk to people no you're not gonna you're gonna sit in the corner more and you're gonna be kind of hesitant and you're gonna feel self-conscious and all those things you know this is this is look there's so many little nuances to making your meet and greets and your as an attendee better like okay here's one here's a secret trick to the trade you ready for this one no god what being a dude that always wears black right the problem with when you wear black is as you sweat during the day you're out in the sweat When it dries now it looks like you rolled around on a sandy beach and you have these white salt marks stretch lines and then you have like deer walking up here like going and licking you're like a salt lick and it's fucking disgusting as hell so like you know keep that in mind, like what you wear. Keep that in mind color-wise. Keep in mind, you know, maybe take an extra shirt if you're going to be outside or doing stuff. That's always – why are you just looking at me? I just feel like you're just kind of looking at me like you don't know what I'm doing.
Speaker3:
I'm just listening.
Speaker1:
This would be a great – You get mad when you say i don't listen to you oh fuck this would be a great show to participate in also from a woman's perspective nobody wants to hear my shit no one cares what i think i'm a guy i've inserted shit here and there i bet you have not what all have you inserted shall you go through the things I'm just going to sit here quietly until you say Something No really though people want to hear Especially guys We're usually the ones that need the most help Because we're big dumb animals We like to hear it from a woman What we should do Well unless you're unless you're at an all-day event, I wouldn't worry about a change of clothes. Seriously? Yeah, what are you going to do, change mid-event? I'm at a point in my life, I would. Really? Oh, fuck yeah. Why? Because I'm 262 pounds, well, not 65 pounds, 265 pounds, 67 pounds, and you put me in a fucking 90 degree room and there's nothing like cuddling up with a fucking water bed with a leak in it. Come here baby you don't like when I sweat on you and you're married to me. So if I'm some random dude wanting to get in your pants and I come up and I'm like hey baby want to dance and i touch you and i drip how much of a chance do i have to get fucking laid you can't even listen to it without fucking starting to get a little nauseous because it drips exactly exactly so we know my nipples are always hard
Speaker3:
you also drip sweat on one girl probably the ex-girlfriend and she and you're like oh my god i'm so sorry she goes no that's hot yeah and i went if you like it go for it but i'm just saying
Speaker2:
I don so sorry. And she goes, no, that's hot. Yeah. And I went, ugh.
Speaker1:
If you like it, go for it. But I'm just saying, we know right now, look, I'm always going to wear a dark coat, so I'll have, like, nipple rings and fucking... You have nipple rings? Yeah, it will sweat around my nipple, fucking bitch, I swear to God. I'm just trying to... See, some women love men's sweat. Right, but, okay, so, and I get that to a degree. But, yes, I would. I would absolutely have no problem. Look, how paranoid am I? I wear cowboy boots.
Speaker2:
Right. Right?
Speaker1:
Have I not always, through the years we've done this this Been very cautious about which pair of cowboy boots I wear
Speaker3:
Yes
Speaker1:
Why
Speaker3:
Because they stink
Speaker1:
Because they can stink See And so yes I'm very conscious about like what I wear For fucking Because I don't want to be the dude that when you take your shoes off And everybody's getting ready to fucking have the orgy And here comes Stinkyfoot In here and fucking
Speaker4:
Hold on pause
Speaker3:
But you'll go hook up with a couple
Speaker2:
I'm going to show you a little bit more. Everybody's getting ready to fucking have the orgy And here comes Stinkyfoot Hold on, pause
Speaker3:
But you'll take You'll go hook up with a couple Take your shoes off and have mismatched Socks And that's okay?
Speaker1:
Yeah, because mismatched socks don't smell bad But it's My older boots can And it's like, no, I won't do that I just, you know So yeah, I'm totally conscious of that fucking part. Seriously? Who cares about mismatched shit? See, peppermint spray for stinky feet. I didn't know they had that. See, now that's something pretty damn cool. You make it. I can make you some. What does it do on your crotch? That's what I want to know. Might tingle a bit. Well then what then would it give somebody like oh that's fresh and minty like gum i don't want to chew it on my dick but just saying it would smell but i don't know if it would taste i'm just all i'm trying to do is trying to help people we just want to help people people there are a lot of new people that they don't know and they're paranoid about look if you're nervous it's one of your first events or first events or first couple events. You know what the reality is? You're going to fucking sweat more and you're going to be paranoid about everything. Look, I can kind of get away with it because people are like, oh, it's just Colby and Big Dumb Cole. Yay! And it's all kind of funny, whatever. And then I can disappear and go clean up or whatever anyways later. But if you're brand new and you're nervous as fuck and you're getting some booze and it's about 75 degrees, you're sweating like a stuck pig on the 4th of July. So how do you deal with crazy summer nights? Be naked and stay in the pool. No. No, I actually think crazy summer nights and campgrounds in general are easier because you, I mean, you can kind of strip down it it's not as awkward to go hey i'm gonna go clean up you know because you've been out doing something and and everybody's doing it i mean let's face it you go to a event and you walk by and half the people are intense wiping themselves down you see them with a wet cloth you know kind of sponge baths bathing themselves anyways so it's more natural plus nobody really feels like they have to say hey hold on a minute I'll see you next time. wet cloth you know kind of sponge back bathing themselves anyways so it's more natural plus nobody really feels like they have to say hey hold on a minute i gotta go clean up yeah i i've seen people at crazy summer nights the past two couples sit around naked start to get at it and before they get at it they just like sponge themselves off right there nobody says a word and but i think that people feel for some reason it's like this awkwardness to do it when you're in an inside building or a hotel there's been some after some meet and greets that i've seriously thought if we went back and played i would i'm i wouldn't have when we first started because i've been too nervous to do it now honestly i would have no problem if we're going to go back to a hotel room and say hey here's the deal give me five minutes i'm gonna. I'm going to take a shower. I would actually do that now. Because it's like, look, you'll be glad I did. Well, I mean, seriously. You know, I think the biggest thing at campgrounds is if you get into a fucking pond. Please, for the love of everything good and holy, if you get into a pond, take a fucking shower before you bring that salmonella fucking shit to other people. that's the one that's that's like the only thing it's like take a fucking shower before you bring that salmonella fucking shit to other people that's the what that's that's like the only thing it's like take a shower just and and the pool does not constitute taking a shower true and then you're switching pond scum for chlorine and that's just i mean now your eyes just burn even more when you're fucking if she squirts or something of where like that happens you are being of no help to me tonight oh my god seriously you normally are really opinionated on this you're not opinionated but you have strong beliefs and you're just kind of like nothing huh have i licked a sweaty cooter or two? Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Speaker2:
Okay.
Speaker5:
Have I gone back?
Speaker2:
Probably not. Well, but right there is the whole thing. That's why it's so important for this shit. Because have you gone back?
Speaker1:
And the answer is no. You know, it makes me look fishy.
Speaker5:
Anyways, this is a guy who does not like fish, so, you know, it's not hot.
Speaker2:
No red snapper. All right, let's take a quick break. Good Lord. Hey, have you seen all of our fucking swag? I'll bet not. What you need to do is go to Full Swap Shop. Where? Full Swap Shop. Oh, my God. I was listening. I didn't go to fullswapshop.com, Where you've listened to the show, you've read the mag. Come on, fuckers. Buy some swag. New stuff being added daily. New shows being added daily. And actually, now, Full Swap Shop is going to have a wide range of lifestyle books as well. Both books, nonfiction and fiction books, are going to be added with our newest store. So check them out today. Full swap shop. I was listening. Okay. Obviously, we're going to jump away from that. That was just a complete and total train wreck and disaster. Jeez, good Lord. All right. I got a question. It got sent in to me. Where is my question? There it is. This question came from G. I didn't want to use his real name uh i am a single male i'm new in the lifestyle i'm new to the area that i just moved to have been in lifestyle for a while uh still not very comfortable at meet and greets have tried to go to some meet and greets but end up just kind of sitting in the corner don't want to interfere don't want to be a problem but i really want to meet more people uh how can i get more involved without looking like a creeper or having people yell at me because i'm a single male that's a good one people yell at him well that's i reached out to him because i'm like hey what part of the country he's actually all you're telling me is from the southwest he wouldn't he wanted to keep it very very i'm like okay that's cool and he said well it's not that people yelling but he said they they just he'll hear people talk about single males like after we stand there he's hearing people talk behind kind of behind the back and shit like that you know and it's like okay and it's like and i asked him i said how long have you moved in the area he's been in the area now for roughly uh about six weeks okay okay so so really new and uh really new but he's been in lifestyle for about three years but he had lots of friends where he was from and very comfortable and now that awkwardness so he's trying to figure out how you know to get going he said that some of the groups he was in before were groups he was kind of with. He was with a couple initially, him and a wife, and started. And so it's long-term friendship. So now he's trying to start completely from scratch. And go. Well, is he just talking about how to just meet people in general or just at meet and greets? He wanted to maximize. His whole thing is he try to get more out of meet and greets that's his whole thing he wants to try to get more out of meet and greets but as he said to me my biggest concern is i feel like that i'm a kind of a stalker he goes i'm not a stalker but i kind of feel like it he said i'm kind of shy so i don't want to interrupt but then i feel like that makes me look bad if i'm just hovering in the corner and in the back but by the same token i feel bad if i'm up trying to you know say hi to a lot of people okay so hold on so how is he finding out about these meet and greets uh he is on a couple of paid sites a couple of the big paid sites and like cassidy and sls so has he not met anybody on those because if you meet people on those and then you meet up just to meet then they can introduce you to people very true but even on those a lot of times it's it's there's a degree of clickiness i mean that the challenge is i get it which part of it is just being willing to kind of stand there. Seriously. And my thing is, is one really great way is, yes, take and fucking try to find a couple. I think Shannon said it somewhere. Find a couple or someone that isn't known. Try to get, you know, I recommend Facebook, obviously, and groups like that. But also, to a degree, kind of just keep standing there, you know? Say hi to people. Keep standing there make sure you you make that round and you say hi to the same people that you saw at the last one so they start to see you consistently shelly single or a couple it doesn't matter you get out of an event what you put into it if you sit down and don't engage people are less likely to come talk to you better Better yet, meet the host. Introduce yourself. A good host will be willing to introduce you to people. Absolutely. Perfect. Yeah, and that is perfect. And that's really the key. But I think one of the most important things that she said right there is you get out of it what you put into it. Like, it's out of people's comfort zone. I get that. I mean, there's been parties where we sat along the wall there was there was and but i mean and and we didn't get anything out of it no i mean and that is really the truth you have you have to take you have to take and force yourself to get out of your comfort zone just a little bit i mean you don't have to be over the top right but you have to force yourself to get out of your comfort zone a little bit to meet some people and and i promise you there's some granted you don't want like three single males running together as a herd that that's never good but i you and i both know there's a couple single females we saw it at at ever at the last meet and greet we were at a single female she's big on uh like, like, FetLife, whatever, but didn't really know anybody in that group. Whatever. Look around the room. You can find somebody else that's probably in the same or similar boat to you. And what a great icebreaker to go. I am really new here. Do you know anybody? I mean, what a great way. Honesty goes a long ways in this shit this shit it really does it will really make a huge difference for you if you will take and be honest and find that other person that's just like you is looking kind of you know lost look look for the other panicked deer in the headlight people you'll be set be set. Lacey, I'm still under one year in the lifestyle,
Speaker1:
and I found firing up friendships within chats, groups help you.
Speaker2:
So at least have someone to be your wing woman or man with.
Speaker1:
Yep, absolutely.
Speaker2:
It took me half the night to get out of my shy mode,
Speaker1:
comfort zone to go up to meet Cole. Well, and like Chance says,'s one and he does you know he always says he'll introduce people you know there are people like shannon and and out there that you know are really good about that's how that's how we did it yeah you know uh travis says we're always willing to look and help new people uh yes lacy did walk right up to me. She did walk right up to me and introduced herself to me. The thing is, is that I think that guys have it a little harder than women do as singles. In terms of the perception, it's equally, I think women walking in to a meet and greet as a single takes a tremendous amount of courage, and I think that's awesome. I think once you get into the meet-and-greet itself, I think it's easier for females because there's lots of thirsty guys than it is for single males sometimes. But either way, you both have to do the same thing. They have to jump out of their comfort zone they do they have to go for it and and you know look you're gonna if i wasn't starting off i never would have walked in you don't think you would have seriously i try to find people i'd have met people ahead of time to walk in because I wouldn't want to walk in by myself. Okay, but the thing, I don't know, okay, I can see that, but by the same token, when you think back to when we met, you took the initiative.
Speaker3:
With which part?
Speaker1:
One fucking, yeah. I guess what you're saying is if you're horny enough, then you'll just go ahead and take charge and go for it. Well, I mean, seriously, I don't know. Walking into a room full of people that you don't know, I would have never gone to a bar just to go hang out at a bar by myself. Yeah, okay, I can see that. I wouldn't have gone to a restaurant to eat by myself. Okay, so here's the question then. So since we do events and we know people who do events, should there be more done to help singles feel comfortable? Because this is a gray area in the lifestyle because there are some people, there are old school people that go singles aren't swingers anyways you know we know people that and that so should though planners do more to help singles feel welcome well what could they do well i don't know i mean let's determine whether they should or not first well it sure wouldn't help them i can't talk it wouldn't hurt them to do something like that.
Speaker3:
But like when we went to Wichita, there was one guy who was kind of standing by the pool table, kind of hanging back. I said, hi, I'm Amanda. How did everybody do who he was? No, they didn't.
Speaker1:
Right, right. Well, you did that with the, there was a dude at, oh, man. Can't think of his name. Sorry, I'm horrible horrible with names if i haven't had sex with you three times i don't need to know your name uh in des moines nice kid nice guy younger guy shot pool with us oh mark yeah okay yeah yeah sorry mark he said sorry i'm fine i'm figuring it out. But, I mean, again, he... He came up to me, though. He did, and out of his comfort zone. But he did, and super respectful. I mean, that's the thing. Super quiet. Trying to get him to play pool. I'm like, oh, let's play pool. Here's the thing. Singles. This is where singles need to raise up, rise up, and heard. You know what? As singles, if you are a single and you know people that do events, send them suggestions what you think that they could do to make it more inclusive. Because here's the deal. As a couple, honestly, we've never had to deal with this as a single. We've never done a single thing in a lifestyle as a single. So really for us to go, go well why don't we do this as first for to help the singles out we do we're kind of talking out our ass because we don't know if that would help or not we don't want we don't want anybody to feel like they're like fucking being um spotted out in the crowd or fucking you know drawn undue attention or anything else but right that that's something to fucking that's something to do okay people coming all over the place and uh shelly was amazing helping people in city she's another one of the the uh cadets and i can't go back and read all the way that uh being a single on an event it's harder than for couples but it's still hard when you are a couple and know no one that's very true it's true you just don't have the safety net of of your significant other although sometimes you see couples and you go wow you feel for like one half of the couple because you can tell like one half of the couple is not wanting to be there and the other half is just like, yay, and running amok just a little bit. No, there's just, there's always a couple. There's always the quiet one and there's always this. How is ours? Who's who? I'm the quiet one. Are you sure? Yeah. I don't think so. See, this is the great lie. Seriously. When was the last time you saw me climb anybody? You get me drunk or you get me a couple of drinks and I'll climb people. I knew them. Don't act like they were strangers I just walked up to and say, hey, you're tall, can I climb you? Just because you know someone doesn't mean you get to treat them like a jungle gem. Seriously. How can you justify that that and what do you mean me get you drunk do what get you drunk you weren't drunk when really are we when you're climbing people you climb people drunk and you climb people sober i was drunk that time i was sober so that meant you did it out of free will. I don't think Chad cared. That's totally secondary to this whole thing. No, they said he's tall. Climb on him. And so I climbed up there and someone took a picture. I climbed up there. I hopped up on his hip. I'm married to a fucking spider monkey. It's awesome. Okay. So you're saying a great way to meet people is climb on them. No. Would you recommend that as a method? No. Would you recommend if you're new just to climb on somebody? Don't you shut up. No. I'm not just going to randomly just walk up and start climbing on people. I'm not randomly going to stick my head in somebody's boobs. That is such a fucking lie. Oh, my God. Are you serious? How are you going to lie to all these people? A lot of these people know us. They've seen this at places. That's like saying, I'm going to sit quietly somewhere. Have you lost your mind? What? Seriously? You are. Wow. We obviously are going to have to start fucking getting gopros and we're both gonna start wearing gopros she's gonna wear stilts to the next week well we'll send the furry up to climb you it's all right um uh wow all right now see doug has a good point there it's really cool when both are quiet people wife and i are both fairly quiet okay that would be that would be challenging yeah i mean if if i i mean i have a hard time keeping up with you so i can't even fathom i i think it's funny you do more than you think you do okay maybe i do i didn't used to yeah well then you started i used to be really shy and hide in the corner you know no you know you you never hit in the corner you wait a minute let's go back a minute and let's revisit our past shall we what? What? Of the two of us, who was the first one to kiss somebody at an event other than their spouse? You or I? That'd been you. I'm guessing that has to be me. Yep. I can name the bar. I can name the night. Yes, that'd be you. Playing pool? Yep. Okay. Yep. Who was the first first one to get made out who was the first one to get groped up by somebody other than their spouse you i don't remember it was who was the first one of us to be in an event to get naked we know the answer to that one sure as hell wasn't you multiple times i was drunk no not all the time who's been the one who's who's been the the main lead at a house party to start the entire house party i am fucking innocent bullshit they were doing introductions and you were like okay well that's great i'm gonna go down and take my clothes off who's coming with me you interrupted like interrupt things to go fuck and everybody followed down it started everything didn't it did so here's the thing we paint this picture of colby and this wild fucking dude does all this shit and little miss man just sitting in the corner and the reality of it is the person who who fucked somebody first between the two of us? Well, we were a couple, so it was together. No, it wasn't, because I was just wrestling with the chick, and she was just fucking yanking my dick off. Oh, that. Yep. That's not my... That is a... No, that wasn't your start, but I'm just saying. No, no. I'm just, I think the only thing I got to, I played alone the first time. I played alone before you did. But other than that, most of the shit, honestly, when you look through the years, which is really kind of funny when you think about it, Who's leading the charge? If we did a count...
Speaker3:
Oh, fuck off.
Speaker1:
Seriously, if we did a count, who would have higher numbers? Not that we keep track... You cannot plead the fifth to all this shit.
Speaker3:
No, it's about even. We've talked about this. Apparently you don't think so. Okay, it's me.
Speaker1:
Well, I'll go that one's even. Wait a minute. Do we have to count oral sex separate?
Speaker3:
Do you count eating a girl out separate?
Speaker1:
Well, here's the thing. Think about all the parties when you get really, really, when you, in the past, when you get really, really drunk. Oh, no, oh no no no no when it's like look there's a penis i did that once jesus the fuck you did we were at one party i was roofied at that one that one you that but it was another one that you weren't you were just drunk at there was the one des moines part was the melee of pile of chicks where they couldn't make the dances because i started it you started it yep uh-huh it was it was fun it was but i'm just saying everybody thinks you're like it doesn't like a female orgy on the dance floor and the thing is is what's so funny is everybody thinks you're like The innocent one And every's like Oh Miss Amanda would never do that Miss Amanda's innocent
Speaker2:
And it's like
Speaker1:
Miss Amanda's the fucking
Speaker3:
She's a Gemini So she has two personalities You get her raring and going And just some alcohol And her she's going to be Completely drunk She's all fucking control But the other one She's all soft and reserved
Speaker4:
And blah
Speaker1:
Yeah and we just put it all All the blame on the Leo
Speaker2:
Yeah
Speaker1:
Is that cool He's just wild and out of control How do you deal with him All right. She's all soft and reserved and blah. Yeah, and we just put it all to blame on the Leo. Is that cool? He's just wild and out of control. How do you deal with him all the time? Center of attention. How do you deal with him all the time? I don't know. How do you deal with his ass all the time? She's not always like this or else we would have an issue. Who was the first one totally naked at a vanilla bar? Fuck off. They closed it for us. Who's been totally naked At a vanilla bar Fuck off They closed it for us Who's been totally naked at a vanilla bar Have you been naked at a bar I was naked How many times have you taken your clothes off In public I was fucking on the tailgate How many times have you gotten naked Even at a lifestyle thing Have you gotten naked This is not to your favor No you can't see Because you're getting naked Yeah I'm naked at crazy summer nights But you're not Because self conscious probably I didn't even figure crazy summer nights Shut up Actually because at crazy summer nights I think that's cool I think it's amazing What? I'm in awe of you and everybody else And getting naked like that At Crazy Summer Nights I think that's At any of the camp I think that's cool as fuck It was hard as hell the first time Right But when you're drunk It doesn't matter Apparently All I'm doing is I'm just defending the fact That everybody goes Runs to your defense that sometimes maybe, maybe Little Miss Innocent Amanda isn't so much. That should help the bidding on your side. $7,000 to go to dinner with Miss Amanda. I'm fine.
Speaker2:
Okay.
Speaker3:
I have a fucking halo, damn it.
Speaker1:
Oh, hey, look, it's time to go. Thank God before Cole gets a divorce. Oh, it is. Holy shit. Yeah, but what? Yeah. I don't know if we help G. Hopefully we help G. I get in moments where I like to put on a show. No, it's actually very fun. And what's funny, you know what the cutest part of the whole thing is? Seriously. Because other people think that it's an isolated incident where I know it's not. And so people are like, oh, she just really cut loose and have so much fun that's so great to see her just cut loose and have fun i'm like yeah wow i'll be damned who'd have thunk it i just i just like you know but that everybody's like oh that's that's just you know that's so unlike her oh my god that's so hot she never does stuff like that i'm like no you're just not at all the same events that i'm at so that's okay that's okay that's all good no it is good it's cute oh wow all right gee well hopefully the one thing i did tell you the other thing i told him i'm like you know what talk to some of his friends back home just going back to wrap up the whole topic we were even talking about. Told him that he should go back home or call some of his buddies or couples and friends that he's made there. And ask them what they think his strongest attribute is. That's a good one. Like in ways to how to deal with it. Because they know him best and there'll become confidence coming from from them or invite one of them out to one of the events because it's like 200 miles away or something where he moves you to invite them out to have a peace of mind. So there you go. Okay, with that being said, a couple of events coming up. We do want to let people know about events coming up before we go. We have, there is, we have got, we've got a bowling meet and greet May 20th. It's here in Lincoln. We're excited for that. Beth Ann's putting that on. We can't wait. Bowling, golf, video games, bar. It's a great time. It's what I had before. It's awesome. Then June 4th, we're in Osceola, Iowa. So check that out. Travis is putting that on. That's the first one. These these are on our page we'll be talking about these as they're coming up closer as well uh we'll talk about other things in june because we've got a fun ride in june and we have got a camp out in june and we have got a couple of meet and greets in june and so we've got we've got stuff uh uh all over the place and yeah so it's made may 20th is the bowling meet and greet. That's the next one coming up. Sign up on our page. If you're not on our page, you want to be part of our secret group, let us know. We'll get you added to the CASBA Inc. group. And don't forget the one on June 4th also. We're going to be at both of those. And don't forget, keep the bidding coming. Apparently, we are at $125 for us as a couple, and we're both at $125 each for individual dates with us. So I'll be damned. There you go. You have a wedding one weekend in Des Moines. Uh, the first, the first weekend in May, which is the mother's day weekend, the fifth and the sixth. So we might have a Friday or Saturday night available. We will. We don't know for sure. Well, we will be there both those nights. Uh, and so we'll be staying both those nights. So yes, we yes, we will have those available after the wedding. After we're working, my work part's done, so we'll be in Des Moines that weekend. So we're excited. So, again, thank you so much for tuning in. Okay, again, shout out to our sponsors real quick. What do Smartest Wingers do? They read asnlifestylemagazine.com. Check it out. Where's the bidding? I'll have that on the page. Amy. We got to talk, Amy. I'll have that on the page. What was I doing? I got all butterflyed again. Motherfuck. ASNLifestyleMagazine.com. Check them out today. Don't forget Full Swap Radio. We're changing the way you listen to the lifestyle. Nightcaps. Again, it'll be in the show notes how you can get your nightcaps promoting safety in the war on fucking date rape. We're going to do everything we can to stop it. And as well, if you like dirty stuff, which we all do, just saying, then Smutify. Check them out. The notes will be in the comments on how to be able to get to Smutify as well. And apparently we're up to $130 for Cole. So, there we go. So, with that being said, doing the only way I know how, the only way I want to, the only way I motherfucking will, Casbah Style, out.
