Send us Fan MailThis week we things a bit different!! Not just a single questions but a topic. SO we talked about the challenges of couples moving at different speeds and being at different comfort levels. How do you handle when your spouse is ready to go from soft swap to full swap, or from playing together to swinging alone. What if your sexual fantasies that involves your spouse does not line up with what they want, gang bangs, 3 sums, anal or what ever. How do you make sure resentment does not become a factor and cheating start to happen. We still have a ton of laughs even with a new format give it a listen and tell us what you think. Want to hear all our shows? go to www.buzzsprout.com/181336Visit our paid sponsors at: http://www.altplayground.net http://www.asnlifestylemagazine.com http://www.fullswapshop.comVisit us at http://www.fullswapradio.comVisit us at : http://www.krazykasbh.comYouTube : http://www.youtube.com/KasbhSend us emails at [email protected]: @TruthKrazyInstagram http://www.instagram.com/Krazy_Kasbh/Support the show (http://www.patreon.com/KrazyKasbh)Support the show
Transcript
Speaker1: Hey kids, the program you're about to listen to contains some adult situations, adult language, themes, and other adult topics. If you're easily offended, this show's not for you. Hey you crazy motherfuckers, I thought that sounded weird. Welcome to another edition of Crazy Truth. I'm your host with the most i'm cole and i'm abused and i'm here with the lovely lovely and sometimes mean miss amanda hey actually i'm not abused that's a joke it's not a good joke but it's a joke she hits me sometimes but it's usually it's consensual and i don't like it uh we are here to we're here to titillate and tantalate tant Tantalate, that ain't even a word. Speaker2: No. That ain't. Speaker1: Listen to me, boy. I'm coming straight. Speaker3: Leave the hate. Try not to hate. Speaker1: Coming straight from the fucking. Speaker3: Love your mate. Speaker1: Coming straight from the trailer parks today. That's where we're going. Speaker2: You are. Speaker1: But no. I feel some deliverance. No, I don't. I kind of got a tambourine, so that's not going to work. Speaker2: Anyway, so. Speaker1: I'm just kidding. So anywho, this is season four of episode 154. Yeah, I cheated. Speaker3: I never know what's going to come out of your mouth. Speaker1: Neither do I most of the time. Right now, I can tell you what's coming out of my pores. Speaker2: Rum. Speaker1: I got a little drunk last night. But before we go down that little rabbit fucking hole. Hole. Yeah, we'll discuss that. Let's give a shout out to our paid sponsors first and foremost. Altplayground.net. Hey, now we've been talking about this. How do you meet and greet people in the lifestyle? You go to what? That's right. Meet and greets. And Altplayground.netnet to put them on around the country you can be a part of this just so you know i just the word is the may 1st uh winery meet and greet is sold out we still have spots at the tiki uh tiki's lounge dock and grill that's uh the 14th of may and they've got spots left at Bombs, Bar, and Eats in Detroit. That's May 14th of May, and they've got spots left at Bombs Bar and Eats in Detroit. That's May 14th also, and the club in Oklahoma City, that place is fucking huge. By the way, they're never going to be sold out because they are massive. That's May 15th. That meet and greet's being put on by a good friend's kinky frame of mind, so make sure you check it out. Sign up today, altplayground.net. Guess what? You can find us there. I know. I can't i can't help it to do that or flim's gonna come all over the microphone i was slimed uh so make sure you check them out also remember tits may sag balls may drop but you should always read see i changed that okay uh so and and you should read what other people read uh and that is porn no i'm just kidding asnlifestylemagazine.com check them out three million swingers can't be wrong education and educated swingers is sexy just say it uh i mean so it's hot cooters but anyways uh check out asnlifestylemagazine.com be three million one uh today and finally you're listening to the shows you're reading the mag come on motherfuckers go buy some swag it's summertime get your latest greatest gear for your favorite shows at fullswapshop.com should i say it again for the kids in back sure fullswapshop.com check it out today we got new stuff going on there actually as of tomorrow I'm tuckered out I'm all tuckered
Speaker2:
Back to you Bob Check it out today. We've got new stuff going on there. Actually, as of tomorrow, I'm tuckered out. I'm all tuckered. Back to you, Bob. So let's discuss last night. Someone got a little drunk. I got no. I got social. I got tipsy, and I got social. Now, wait a minute. If I recall, this just shows how much there's... In Cole's life, there is a switch. My world has a switch inside of me. On-off. You had been squawking at me because you were like... You were concerned about which way the night would go because... Why? Because you've been stressed. And been agitated. Yes, very agitated. So, the thing is, Cole's always a happy drunk. I've been kind of snippy. I haven't been snippy. Shut the hell up.
Speaker1:
No, I'm kidding.
Speaker2:
Cole, sometimes, if I get agitated, sometimes, I'm normally a very happy drunk. But there's always that potential for shit to go, like, way south.
Speaker1:
Just go, which way is it going to go? Now, what happened?
Speaker2:
You were happy.
Speaker1:
As soon as the band started to play, what happened? and away we were off we went yeah go sea biscuit go uh yes mike we are live yet hold on one sec you want to type yes in there uh so uh yeah so i had a great time we got here band you know we're all coming out of hibernation we don't really know exactly what to do uh so but we we did and well it's just it's just different because you know when you start off you had to have reservations at this bar to listen to this band yep and so you sat for the first set and then they go the second set you can actually get up and dance it's because they it was? It's because it switched from when the kitchen was open. Look, the reality of it is this. So it had nothing to do with COVID? It did, because it's from the restaurant part versus the kitchen from just the bar part. Because you're eating and stuff moving around. So obviously where we're at, there's all kinds of different things that are going on, different rules, regs, whatever. And the thing is, is this.
Speaker2:
I'm going to put this out there because this is really true, and I really, really believe this.
Speaker4:
I don't give two fucks what you believe about COVID.
Speaker2:
I don't care what you believe about masks. I don't want to give two fucks what you think about the rules and regulations. In fact, if you tell me what you think, I'm going to tell you to go suck a dick and fuck off. What I do care about is having fun.
Speaker1:
And so if the way we get to go out and have fun is we have to follow the rules we have to follow the rules you know what the other option is we can all sit in our houses oh we'll make it fun and the thing is is everybody had a good time we followed the rules and then we were able to go in the back room where that we and no one had to wear mat and everybody had a blast there's a there was a nice group everybody was people were tipsy i've heard a lot of people say they got tipsy and had fun we listen to band it was a great time a lot of talking and actually getting to know some yeah and there was a lot of shit going on in and around here in our area yeah so we obviously we couldn't go to everything uh there was at least two or three other parties events were going on and rock on we're getting to come out of our show So, obviously, we couldn't go to everything. There was at least two or three other parties and events were going on, and rock on, we're going to come out of our show. So, everybody, just remember this. No matter what your opinions are, it's about having fun, and we have the opportunity to have fun. So, you know what? I don't know. Let's fucking just have fun. It sounds like a good plan to me because it was awesome to be out again. Something about stumbling out of bar at 1 30 in the morning again that feel well after everybody left we stayed for the rest of the band and we just kind of stood in the corner and danced with each other and bounced around cold did not need any more liquor nope and cold did not have any more liquor so that was uh that was really good liquor yes so so you were tipsy and you said if the drive were any longer that you would have passed out i would have most definitely so then a little nippy nap then you then you want sex yeah yeah and no and no and here's the thing when we were gonna bug you were like got all like yeah because you were acting kind of like drunk stop doing that i hate that. I fucking hate that. So, yes, you were acting drunk, and sometimes when you're drunk... I wasn't acting. You just put your entire weight on my body, and I can't handle it. I still thrust. It's not that I just pass out. No, the one time you were so hammered, you crawled on me, and you just laid there and I'm like, get off. Okay, but most of the time I still move in some variety. So no, the comical part was. One, the getting the dog out of the way, that was amazing.
Speaker3:
That wasn't that much of a chore. I moved a 12-pound dog. We're all good.
Speaker1:
I couldn't figure that out.
Speaker3:
No, when you started looking at my nipples, you were looking at it like a clit.
Speaker1:
And I'm like, you're supposed to suck them, not look them like a clit. I was like'm like there was nothing there was no like you're supposed to suck them there was no like no i was like and i was like writing the alphabet on her nipples so all i could do was laugh i was i was a little i was a little tipsy so then i went and tried it on your clit and it worked well yes so there we go and then we fucked and then i passed out and not very long because it was hot and i was i think i was having a midlife i had like menopause hit me and i had no you were drunk well i was hot right whatever i don't it doesn't matter it was shit after you finished i used a vibrator i didn't hear that part i know you passed out it was it was quiet it was the soft little and i was like well that's sexy and there we So, you know, that's what it is. So, yeah. That was comical. Like, what are you doing to my nipple? And I'm like, well, really? Let's see if it works on your clit. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, that was funny. And you know what's funny? She didn't bitch about my beard being wet then. Weird. I didn't kiss you afterwards either did I I don't remember I was drunk why have you just been kissing yourself I know like a threesome you me and you one slightly more use than the other no one of these things is not like the other just saying I don't how do I put it without sounding moronic.
Speaker3:
I don't like my face wet.
Speaker1:
Don't squirt on my face. Don't cum on my face. And don't slobber on my face. I'm going to spit. No. I'm going to get punched. Even showering, I go. I don't like to get my face wet. What she did for those of you who are just hearing, she covered her face. Oh, I forgot about that. She screams like a little girl. Yay, watery. No, I don't like to get my face wet. What she did, for those of you who are just hearing, she covered her face.
Speaker3:
Oh, I forgot about that.
Speaker1:
She screams like a little girl. Yay, water. No, I'm kidding.
Speaker2:
It's not a bad.
Speaker1:
By the way, real quick, before we go any further, I do want to mention to those of you that are just listening, you should be watching too, but we did this in front of our live secret, secret Facebook group.
Speaker2:
Goop?
Speaker1:
Group, Kazba Inc. Shh, don't tell the others. And so uh they'll interject if you go through so charlotte says that her drinks are still kicking her ass and we that means we did right uh monty monty sent me the thing he was a little drunk because i was a little drunk too so really yeah so everybody had a great time well he passed it off well because i didn't know i wouldn't have figured i I was all right until I stood up and moved around, and I was like, whoa. So that's all right. But okay. How bad was it? I didn't realize I was drinking Pepsi. Yeah, no shit. No shit. And I don't like Pepsi. And she was sober. Yeah, I was sober. I was just excited to get out. I quickly gave her the keys. That was early. I made the decision. I'm like, I'm only going to have one. And then when I one and then when i got there i had he always says that you know i don't plan on having very much to drink i'm not gonna get drunk and then as soon as he said that i looked at him i went why did you say that because every time you say it you get drunk but now the difference is when i was younger i denied that it was gonna happen and just happened now i turned and said i've made the decision i'm going to get drunk here are the keys and so i did it in a much more you know i my maturity level is so much bigger better and brighter now just saying whatever please anyways whatever we'll go with it yeah okay so here's the thing so we're gonna do a um we're changing the format of the show okay why are you looking at me like you don't know we had this and we talked about this i act like i don't know what we're talking about well normally you don't but this time you do i know so it's kind of weird you could have interjected no it's It's all good. What? It's all good. Interject what? Anything.
Speaker3:
Run with it. Go, Steve. Let's get go. I'm giving you the opportunity to totally take charge to be the strong woman that you are. I don't know how you're going to segue into this shit, so I have no idea. I was going to pass it to you and let you segue. Oh, fuck off. Well, that worked out well. Okay, see, that's why we don't have production meetings. It's not worth it. Well, no. We talked about what we were going to talk about. We didn't talk about how you were going to bring it up to talk about it. So there's a big difference there. All I know is I have a new mic stand, and it's heavy and firm, and it holds my mic better. And it, yeah. So I feel like things are, it's going to be a good show. Great show. Okay. Other than that, I got nothing. So, okay. So, no, we're going to change the format tonight. Instead of doing. I'm tired. No way. Really? I've got coffee. No. For those of you just listening, she swallowed the microphone as her head opened like a python Okay but we got home at 2 o'clock Well okay no we got home at like 1.45 And then we fucked Okay so it was like 2-ish
Speaker1:
2.11 until we got on fucking Okay I was pretty good when I was drunk Shut up
Speaker3:
No you're good when you're drunk I just dry out because I'm old There's a difference And then
Speaker1:
I fucked her silly
Speaker3:
I woke up at 6
Speaker1:
Yeah way to go
Speaker3:
Yeah 4 hours That fucking sucks
Speaker1:
Let's go. good when you're drunk i just dry out because i'm old there's a difference and then i fucked her silly yeah i woke up at six oh way to go yeah four hours that fucking sucks i slept like two i was up at 3 30 no five don't tell me what time i was and wasn't up you weren't with me you went to the couch yeah and i came back into bed at 4 53 and i was up at 5 30 p.m i was about 3 30 p.m well that's because the alcohol not necessarily i'm old also so you dry out and i piss my I don't know. 53 and i was up at 5 30 p and i was up at 3 30 p and well that's because the alcohol not necessarily i'm old also so you dry out and i piss more i leak more welcome to fucking being old anyways maybe you should go to a doctor and get that checked out yeah whatever okay so anyways now back to what we were saying before we were talking so we've done previous shows on all kinds of stuff including things such as and not limited to in the content of i just didn't have to you look me word uh things like people want to know about playing alone and just how to get people to do different things, how to get, how to get your spouses to, to, um, get in a lifestyle. We've heard that we've had those questions. So we kind of wanted to follow up because we got another round of those questions. And so we wanted to follow up, but instead of a specific question, what we wanted to talk about tonight or today, whatever is we want to talk about the overall concept of what in the lifestyle, when you're playing as a couple, what do you do or how do you handle or deal with the fact that when a couple, when you're each at a different level in the lifestyle, we make this general assumption that if you and I are playing together as a couple, that we're going to move through the steps, so to speak, at the same pace. And that's not true. We're still, just because we're a couple, just because we're long-term married, just because all of those things doesn't mean that we're going to move through the steps of the lifestyle at the same pace or want to or want to exactly so you shouldn't move at a different pace it should it evolves but but you're going to evolve each person is going to evolve differently we're still look we do it all the time when we do marriages just because because you're married or whatever else, you're still, you're still individual people. And the thing is, is we like to be able to put the general blanket on it and go, well, if you're not ready, then I just need to just not be ready. In theory, yes, but that's not easy. There's, there's emotions that go along with that. Why are you looking at me like that? What the hell? What do you mean, what the hell? If one's ready to move on, you wait till the other one's ready. I understand you. I didn't. Did I say you just say fuck the bitch and move on? No. I said it would be perfect to say I'm just supposed to go i'm not ready and it's okay you don't move on until everybody's ready but it doesn't mean you don't deal with the fact that there are emotions and and feelings and things that are tied into the person who is ready and and right you're not, I mean, is that making sense?
Speaker2:
Yeah.
Speaker1:
Because here's the thing.
Speaker2:
Look,
Speaker1:
and we'll use us as an example,
Speaker2:
right?
Speaker1:
If I'm, if I'm ready,
Speaker2:
what, what,
Speaker1:
what do you fucking need?
Speaker3:
My package. Because I want something to scratch my back.
Speaker1:
Jesus Christ.
Speaker2:
Okay.
Speaker3:
The thing is,
Speaker2:
I'm like, look, she's like.
Speaker3:
I wasn't trying to bug you.
Speaker1:
I was trying to find like, see if I had scissors in here or something that I could scratch. Use the paddle. That won't scratch my back. Okay, anyways, back to the show, as if people want to know something about this. So the thing is, is that using you and I as an example, is that if, just because you're not ready to move on, and I am ready, okay? If me sitting there just going, and I just close off and go, okay, that's fine, we won't. What happens is if those feelings aren't addressed, then I can start to feel like my feelings don't matter. Yeah. I can start to feel resentment resentment i can start to feel uh anger hostility whatever and all of those things look if feelings are not addressed and we don't honestly approach this this is one shit when in the lifestyle it goes from playing as a couple to cheating or has or has the potential to right or to cause a lot of damage the other flip side of that the other extreme is if you're not ready and i am and you just go well okay and you just do something you're not comfortable with obviously again there's a whole lot of bad that can happen with that do you want to say are, what the fuck? I'm trying to figure out where you're going. So where I'm headed with this is the fact that we need to talk a little bit about, number one, talk about the fact of how often does it happen that one party is ready to maybe graduate or move on when the other one's not when we've got in the lifestyle when we got in the lifestyle fucking a why do we have meetings when we got into the lifestyle okay once we who was it that wanted in the lifestyle first you absolutely i was like go after we first hooked up who was having the most fun in the lifestyle not fucking me you but we did it together i i get that we did it together but you were having more fun than i was yes it was erotic as hell and you were having issues right then as we continued through the lifestyle i was the one there were certain there were certain things that you were ready to do and try before i was and vice versa i think i thought i was i thought we were ready to try playing alone before you did yeah you were much more ready to play in a separate room before i was
Speaker3:
no earlier on right but actually playing alone you did it first and i was okay with it
Speaker1:
when playing separate but let's go back playing and set we start off when we first start off we were same room right full swap same room right and that was there that was a non-negotiable Let's go. We started off, when we first started off, we were same room. Right. Full swap, same room. Right. And that was a non-negotiable. Right. You were more ready and willing to go to the step of full swap, different room. When you were cracking jokes and distracting us, yes. Right. But not just on that. Overall, yeah you were okay with that it didn't phase me you were you were okay with that way faster than i was yeah okay but then when it came time to when it was like playing alone i thought and i felt like we were could handle that way sooner than you did and And I did it first. Yeah, I did it first. You were not an advocate of playing alone. Well, I don't remember. No, you were not an advocate of playing alone. I know you were panicked. I wasn't going to be okay with it. I'm like, no, go ahead. I have no interest in this female. Whatever. But I'm like, no, go play. I'm okay with it. Are you sure you're okay with it yes i'm okay with it you go play but you were not one you had not been one that was like hey we you had never instigated that conversation no at all and you'd have been fine if that conversation never would have happened at that time once we once we start both did it then it was not a big deal we work through things in a step-by-step process right god you're killing me so the thing is is the the we also had a shit ton of communication with each one of those steps well it's important especially if you're afraid the other one isn't okay with it, after you do it, to at least talk it out completely
Speaker3:
and include all feelings and emotions.
Speaker1:
The first part of it is understanding that there's a distinct possibility you're not going to be on the same page with stuff. We didn't start as a soft swap couple. So I've known of couples that both were not on the same page starting from soft swap moving to full swap right okay so that's that's a step and and the thing is it's a give and take and a communication to go through it there are some steps that are bigger okay in my opinion at least the step going when you start talking about playing alone, that step is substantially bigger than say, you know, full swap, couple of different room at the time. It wouldn't have been at the time. It was just as huge, but in the grand scheme of things, it's really, that's a monster step. That's a big step. So, you know, making sure that people have, have, but you know, I thought you were going to have more of a problem with it that's why i hooked up with someone that you've seen me have sex with in the same room yeah well just like anything else you never know how much of an issue you're going to have till it happens very true that's that's a big part of it so the point though i want to try to get people to understand at first is you have to acknowledge that there's going to be differences and you're not going to be on the same page. And I think couples don't do that. I don't think couples, and I think it can be as simple as things like gang bangs or threesomes. You hear all the time about threesomes, the difference. If you ask the male version of a couple or the female version of what is an ideal threesome they will you will get different answers so you have to understand that it's not you're not going to be on the same page and then you have to understand how to process that and how to and how to actually move through those steps which leads to the other part of what do you do when you reach a point where it's not, there's not a process to work through. It's just a non-negotiable. That's the second half of this that comes into play. There might be a step that it just becomes non-negotiable that I may never be ready to cross that step. Gotcha. How does that affect in the in the lifestyle i mean this is the shit that these are all hobbies right and this is supposed to be fun but there's a lot of things with this that that can play into the emotions stable is your marriage though i mean i know ours but i mean I mean, the random couple that's delving into different aspects of it,
Speaker3:
how solid is their marriage to be able to withstand it?
Speaker1:
But see, there's the other thing that becomes subjective. I would put money. I would guess. This is totally my opinion, totally a guess. But if you took most husbands and wives, think back the old the dating game or the the newlywed game where they would sit down and they'd ask the guys questions when the wives would have their couldn't hear and vice versa and how fucking different their answers were they were newlyweds they didn't know each other right yes yes i got really thanks Anyways, the thing... They had another version of that that was not newlywed. Okay. Another married couple. And it was still way different answers. I watched on YouTube when they had all the former guest hosts of other TV shows because Bob Barker and his wife was on there when they were young. Weird. Anyways, but if you sat down with most couples and said, took the guy and the girl alone and said, rate what your level, how strong your marriage is, one to 10, 10's the best, one's the worst. How strong your communication is, 10's the best, one's the worst. What is the chance of your marriage ever ending? One is for sure, 10 is never. If you ask those three questions of of a hundred couples separate rooms i'll bet you i would safely bet less than 10 percent would put there would answer those questions the same yeah but their thought processes are different right which is the whole fucking point of this which is when you when you say when you god when you say when you say well how strong the marriage is how strong the marriage is right well that depends how strong is it how strong would you what would you rate our marriage one to ten communication what would you rate it Today, only have an hour long show what would you rate it one to ten eight or nine well which is it i didn't say it eight to nine pick a fucking number nine there's always room for improvement okay now on monday through saturday i agree with that. I'd say a nine. On Sundays before the show, I'd say about a two because obviously that didn't go well. On a scale of one to ten, one being the worst, ten being the best, how strong would you rate our marriage?
Speaker2:
Ten.
Speaker1:
I would rate it a ten also. Because you went first.
Speaker2:
No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Okay.
Speaker1:
And the chances of the lifestyle breaking our marriage up, one being no way in hell, 10 being 100% possibility. What would you rate it?
Speaker2:
Wait a minute. What?
Speaker3:
One is not it would and break it up?
Speaker1:
One is, wait a minute, how is this?
Speaker3:
Because you said 100% that it would.
Speaker1:
Yeah, one is 100% that it would. 10 is there's no way it would. 100% it wouldn't.
Speaker3:
That it would break up our marriage? I don't know.
Speaker1:
Give me a number. See, now the show just got real. Give me a fucking number. 9.5. So what you're saying is the boyfriend's making headway? No, okay. Yeah, like a tenth of a... Right. I would agree because never say never. Never say never because you never know what's going to come along. Well, actually, the reason I would say it is if you say 10, there's nothing while we break it up, then you're not watching watching for things that can you're not watching for the cracks that can create something that agreed if you're if there's always something to watch for then you are watching so that shit doesn't do that so somebody doesn't homewreck you or whatever the case may be okay but most couples i've talked to couples what how would you say your communication is? He'll go eight, she'll go three. Because there's a big difference in the thought process between a dude and a chick. Exactly. So if the thing is, is where this all leads to is, you can't base it off of the general question of how, depending on how strong their marriage is that the lifestyle and every step and every part of the process and every new thing you do you have to look at it as your newbies and you're starting over and see i think that's the part that that doesn't happen and i think you have to be when you have to be willing to accept the fact that your partner may not ever want what you want true and and so the the thing with that is it's kind of like it a gangbang is a really good example it's actually well no it really is because here's why there are some women that really want a gangbang there are some women that really want no part of a gang bang and some don't really know there are some women that really want a gangbang. There are some women that really want no part of a gangbang, and some don't really know. There are some husbands, and I was one of them, that really want you to have a gangbang. There are some husbands really don't want you to have a gangbang, and there are some that really don't know. So if we talk about the subject of a gangbang and how that's going to work, if I come to you with that question, I have to be willing because we're newbies at that we're brand new we've never done it right that means i have to be willing to say do you want this and have you go no not at all and go back to thinking like a newbie which is no we don't at which point in time i have to say i really want to i really i really want to be a part of a gangbang because maybe that's what it is maybe it's not so much at that point in time okay you don't want a gangbang but i want to be a part of a gangbang can i be a part of a gangbang so so then so then you have to take and you talk about it and you may never change. I may never get exactly what I want, which is to watch you in a gangbang. But maybe I can participate in one somewhere else. But you have to communicate that part. If you go into stuff with me trying to figure out how I can sucker you into a gangbang, i can sucker you into saying that the answer that i want to hear well in your regular marriage that doesn't work or it's a bad idea eventually it's going to come back to fucking kick you in the ass but in the lifestyle that's a horrible idea right can backfire yeah i mean this is when people start doing weird shit like oh hey we're this about look at all these guys that just happen to be around here one another drink hey you know i mean you can't do that right and that seems absurd because it's gang bang duh well it's the same thing with different steps other steps in the lifestyle i mean it i guess a part of it is is understanding that you don't ever have to you don't have to take any steps We'll be right back. in the lifestyle i mean i guess a part of it is is understanding that you don't ever have to you don't have to take any steps that's huge part we'd have time so we're at right now yeah jesus fuck so far so good this is going great hon let's take a quick break and fuck uh hey don't forget to check us out all of of our stuff, at CrazyKazba.com. You can shop our merchandise. You can see where we're going to be. You can participate in Kazba Cares and so much more at CrazyKazbaKazba.com. And also, don't forget you can hear us every single week on FullSwapRadio.com. Wait, what was that? FullSwapRadio.com. Check us out. We're actually on Mondays at 5 Central, and again, Mondays at 11 p.m. Central Standard Time. Check us out today. Not today, but next time on a Monday. Just saying. Whatever. So how did we bring up... Back to this fucking disaster. Well, you know... It's a learning curve. We're taking a step. This is where our communication lags. So never say 100%. We're doing pretty good so far. Okay. So who initiated playing alone? I think that I... Was it the one in the hotel room was the first one for you, right? Yes. Where she was taking a bath? Uh-huh. Yes. Yep. and I think that i was the one in the hotel room was the first one for you right yes where she was taking a bath uh-huh yes yep and i think that was it was a it was a it it was an easily broached subject because you had made mention about the fact that there was a huge sexual chemistry between us so you could tell there was a huge attraction there sexual chemistry there and that you had no interest and i'm like well you know why couldn't i fuck her well you know what maybe maybe we could try so you brought it up so i brought it up and you were very very open to it just like anything else in the lifestyle. And this is, I will say this, this is why it's so big to be honest and communicate on things. After it happened, I was super concerned about making sure you were okay with it. And there was a level of guilt. There was level of even though you knew everything i mean all parts of it knowing about it a lot like when we first got in the lifestyle that i went through and then the first time you played alone my level of anxiety went up just like it when we're doing the lifestyle really even though you've seen me play with him even even though even though i had no fear of of you leaving or anything. 99% of the fears we have in the lifestyle are irrational if you talk them through. If you don't talk them through, they become very rational. But if you talk them through, you can see that they're actually probably pretty irrational. But you have to talk them through. So it obviously didn't bother either one of us to play again. No, no. Because once you got used to it, but we talked about it. I feel like that was so long ago. It was, but we talked about it. Well, I know that. That was the difference. Fucking, that's really the shortest fucking podcast we're ever going to fucking do. So the thing is, okay, so if you don't address the issues heart to heart and really work to get your point across and work to communicate it whatever the step or whatever it is you're wanting to try or do that's when you're going to have issues right so you need to if you want somebody if you want to try to present your case you need to build a strong case you need to talk about and build everything that goes with why under so people they can understand why you're thinking that way what does it mean the whole nine yards and you have to be willing to understand that they may say no.
Speaker2:
Right.
Speaker1:
And so then you need to have figured out what is plan b because if you get told no just like in life then you have to deal with it so how are you going to deal with it i mean if that needs to that needs to be something that that you talk about at that point in time because brooding about it pouting about it pushing it isn't gonna pushing it could totally backfire fuck yeah it can okay so let me ask you this when okay so when you're not blue which time
Speaker3:
jackass I meant literal so Okay, so when your nut blew. Which time? Jackass. I meant literal. Right. Okay, so we were at a party the weekend before. We were. And we both went, you know what, we're really not in the mood to play. That's correct. We went back to the room. We didn't even play. Nope, we didn't. We went to bed. Yep, that's right. Yep, I remember all those parts. Right. Right. So then the next weekend, you were having a nut taken out.
Speaker2:
I was.
Speaker3:
Okay, so.
Speaker1:
There it went. On top of old Smokey.
Speaker3:
Back up a little bit.
Speaker1:
I'm covered with cheese.
Speaker3:
Because a couple of weeks.
Speaker1:
I lost my poor nut.
Speaker3:
Oh, fuck off.
Speaker1:
Because I fucking sneezed.
Speaker3:
Okay, so the week before the party is when I hooked, or two weeks, whatever.
Speaker2:
I don't know. porn oh fuck off because i fucking sneezed okay so the week before the party is when i hooked or two weeks whatever i hooked up with the word guy right right yep i remember i paid for it and then i still have the receipt you didn't pay for it because that was at work that was the one that was on a whim the very first time yes that wasn't the very first yes it was no january 22nd was the very first time we hooked up because we use that room for something else later oh shit we did yeah so that was the second time and i did play and i did pay for it i do still have the fucking receipt anyways your point pumpkin i forgot we okay so when i was recovering from my nut was the third time that you play okay so when you were recovering you're like go play yes and i felt guilty as shit as well you should have no you shouldn't have no i no i felt guilty because i'm like yeah but you can't do anything we were still and still, and this is part of that learning curve.
Speaker4:
We were still new in that.
Speaker2:
We weren't that new, though. No. Over a year.
Speaker1:
We were still new in that type of a scenario. Again, you can call it fuck buddy, you can call it boyfriend, you can call it whatever. A separate relationship type situation. That was only the third time. It was only the third time that that you had hooked up you two had hooked up at that point so it was still new so we were still just like every step we were still learning we were still talking about it you feel did you how did you feel knowing that you'd had surgery and couldn't do anything it didn't bother me i mean you're horny as shit when i got home right it no yeah i was it no it didn't bother me because i couldn't there was nothing i could do okay so the bigger question is has there been times that it has that it's affected me yes absolutely okay there there are times there are times that you sit there and go okay great what the fuck ever fine go fuck yeah great you're fucked great that's usually because generally either is because either i have not hooked up for quite a while whatever and i'm usually balls deep or ball deep because i only have one uh in in a project and work on stuff and i'm just frustrated with that whatever does it ultimately bother me no if we had never played before would have bothered you for me to hook up with him if we had never played alone yeah if if knowing what i knew of just because i go in hindsight and knowing how mind fucked it made me so if you were a guy having, well let's
Speaker3:
just say if you were a guy having issues or medical induced issues or whatever the case may be would you what kind of emotions would you have had?
Speaker1:
The fear factor, okay so the fear factor the first time you played by yourself was I'm not going to be able to be able to gauge your reactions and the fear that you're going to Thank you. fear factor the first time you played by yourself was i'm not going to be able there to be able to gauge your reactions and the fear that you're going to tell me oh it was okay when you really loved it i wasn't able to be there to see it myself okay okay and let it be known you have no history of lying to me right and the thing is is that i would say oh my god it was awesome i wouldn't have hidden and just said it was okay but as a guy you know so you can't you couldn't see that for yourself uh the other thing when like with if it would have been if we had still been new like that with having just blown up my nut or with a medical condition would be that i'm never going to be you know i'm tainted now i'm i'm you know well you have to understand at that point in time i didn't know what if i would have issues true right you know at this point in time i know it hurt to stand up so i don't fucking know you know i didn't i wouldn't know and i would end feeling like maybe less of a man. And it's like, okay, so yeah, so she finds somebody who can fill that void. Again, irrational. Completely irrational if you talk it through. If you don't, it becomes very rational. The problem is because if you don't talk it through, what happens you it's a self-fulfilling prophecy at that point in time because you can still sense the change and i'm and you go what's wrong nothing and i'm not saying it and so then you're feeling guilty and then you pick up the anger why the fuck if there's something wrong just tell me why the fuck is he? You know, fine. Are you pissed or not? You're not pissed? Fuck you. It's the way a fight works. And that's what only thing is. It's an argument that is being waged in two people's heads. It's never actually being verbalized with each other. So when you start arguing with somebody else, but it's all in your head and you're filling both roles, that fight can get pretty fucking vicious. And that person can say some really dicky things because they're not saying you're thinking all these things, right? And so that part of it, if you let this shit fester and you don't fucking bring it up and actually talk about it, then you got a problem. I think one of the everything leads to I wanted to try to make it so people understood it wasn't just about playing alone but i think everything leads to ultimately playing alone that that becomes there's a lot of people that want to play alone because it is hard to find couples that mesh that everybody wants you know it's like one one set a couple no like the man of one couple and the woman of the other couple have this strong sexual desire to fuck each other and then the other couple are like yeah i don't know it there's dynamics there's personality differences there's humor differences there's sexual style differences there's yeah if you've lived it you've seen it i've seen it the other way around we both we went through this where if i have a huge if there's a sexual tension connection you know we've had guys get up i'm hammering some dude's wife and he couldn't handle that and it was like everybody there was no rules broken but it was it it mind fucked him not ripping on the dude it it's happened first the other way the other problem is there's a couple you know maybe we hook up as a couple and my shit's not working that night so then all of a sudden she's getting cheated or his shit's not working that night and you're getting cheated. It's very hard to go as a couple. And so, yes, there's plus here's the reality of it. There's an added dirty factor. There's an added kink factor playing along. I don't give a fuck what anybody says. I always feel like you perform better without me around uh yeah i do i do i i do because i think that i'm not you're still my wife first and i know that you're watching that you're concerned to make sure i'm not having issues so i know you're not completely focused on what you're doing because you're making sure i'm okay so yes there is a degree of playing alone it's a little bit dirtier because it's it's it just is it's there's nothing else it's just focused one-on-one there's a lot of perks to it but a friend of mine of ours said at one time every time you hook up and you swing as a couple you're taking and you're testing the strength of your relationship it's the weirdest fucking hobby in the world and she was exactly right and the reality is when you are fucking playing alone We'll be right back. fucking hobby in the world and she was exactly right and the reality is when you are fucking playing alone you're taking that test of your relationship you're you're upping that another level because like we talked to one time if if rules get broken did a rule get broken or did it get purposely denied or purposely ignored i mean right there's all these other factors that you have to have trust on that one you have to have trust greater risk greater reward it is what it is but there is a legitimate fear out there and this is where you have to take honest inventory of your relationship there is legitimate fear of playing alone can create a huge crack in your marriage we we saw it early on we had it happen we had a girl that we were playing with that was that years and years ago when we first the first time that she would try We were very new. She tried to home wreck because she was jealous of you. She wanted what you had. And the thing was, I didn't see it. Yeah, no, you didn't. You saw it. Our kids saw it, but I didn't see it. So there's a higher, and that wasn't even playing alone. There's a higher risk factor that goes with it. And you have to be willing to communicate and admit that that is very fucking real. There's a lot of people are going to listen to this and they're going, well, that's not us. We're nowhere there. We don't do that with this, with that. I'm telling you right now, if you've been at wherever you're at in your journey until you're where we're at until you're there until you're playing alone consistently or getting the first time you're getting a relationship outside of a marriage because there was a time we said we would never do boyfriend girlfriends until you're there exclusive yeah until you're there you don't know what you're talking about yeah and when you're there you don't know how you're gonna feel or react until it's happening now i'm sure there's something else that will come up because again we talk about it we i was talking to somebody last night when we're out about how how we literally have we call it a free range relationship and that's really what we have we're very chickens we're chickens we're very rare in the lifestyle and i'm sure there'll be something else down well there there's already going to be something else there'll be a new twist in theory down the road right Right? There's going to be a new twist. At some point in time, you're going to have a sleepover. Like a slumber party. Sort of. Yeah. And there'll be pizza and it'll be great. But, okay, but that's something new. We laugh about that right now because there was a time I was going to be out of town and guy was wanting to meet you when we're new and it was like it didn't make sense for you to drive home if you were going to meet them but we couldn't wrap our head around that whole concept of sleeping in the hotel so that to be 10 years later and he didn't want just me he wanted a couple yeah exactly. But then to meet 10 years later and be at a totally different thing, there's always new challenges or new steps. I was asked, how will I feel about when you do a sleepover? My answer is, I don't know. I can tell you, right now I would say, I'll be fine. That is completely an uneducated answer. It's just an assumption. Do I think it's correct? Yes. But until I won't at midnight that night, I'll be able to tell you. I'll be able to answer that question. Right? Well, I mean, seriously. I mean, that's be that's how that that's how that works you don't know and and so a lot of people are going to listen and go well this doesn't even concern us it will if you do if you just keep going if you stay in this long enough even if you don't consistently play alone or even you don't consistently go from soft swap to full, if you're even doing it once you're thinking about it, this concept, what we're talking about, will affect you.
Speaker3:
I never even thought even vaguely we would even be considering a fucking sleepover.
Speaker1:
You would have thought that it would have been me before you.
Speaker2:
Yeah.
Speaker1:
With the other gal. Yeah. Because she lives so far away yeah because you were and we we were at adamant at one time i mean
Speaker3:
we kind of had sleepovers in a hotel if that counts but it not really yeah but we were both
Speaker1:
because we were both there yeah but even then think about this even then we never slept I'll see you next time. Because we were both there, yeah. But even then, think about this. Even then, we never slept with anybody but each other in the hotel. Think back. There was one time it was headed that way, and that was the night we were cracking all the jokes about the Star Wars stuff that so no sex happened, and then we ended up switching, and we even both sat on the way home the next day. It was it was like yeah i didn't know how that was gonna work out i really don't know yes you do yes because i got told that eating pussy i sound like darth vader and all the shit sorry but that's true we always slept even if we shared a hotel room even when we were were with our our third our my girlfriend i don't want you to call her at that time whatever yeah i slept in the middle yeah yeah we we still followed those what i would consider now antiquated rules we we would not need to do that now because after the first one we said we never have another one in our bed yeah of course it wasn't our bed it was a hotel but here's the thing now it wouldn't bother you no now it wouldn't it wouldn't i don't care that's just evolving right but there was a lot of communication to get there yeah the thing is this. If you are to the point where if you don't talk about it you are just i guess here's the thing if you want something bad enough you're going to do it regardless of whatever that conversation is but understand this you make that decision The thing is, it's a thing is is that for one side of the couple that's apprehensive though doesn't know how they're going to feel about it doesn't know how emotions are going to play into it how are you going to know until they do it right but you have to talk it at you you have to be i think you have to be honest and set up that you have to talk ahead of time and you have to be honest that you don't know and then the person that goes it's gonna be okay has to say as soon as it's over sit down go okay let's talk and has to be the one then to to come back and and really show the person that was nervous a you have to understand why they're nervous about it once you understand that then it's your responsibility like if you were nervous about it i wasn't when it when it's the event's over it's my responsibility to come back and and go through it with you as many times it takes till your fears are you're saying no it didn't come out that way. Everything is just fine. Everything's back to normal.
Speaker2:
The scary thing is, is that every step in this lifestyle, when you take it, you can't take it back. But you just have to talk it through to make it. Yeah. To reassure them you're not going anywhere. to talk with you but if you make the decision to if you make the decision to do what you want to do no matter what okay understand that is going to hurt you in a lifestyle if it gets back to your partner it's going to i don't know that can ever be recovered from yeah to be honest i i i can tell you i wouldn't want to try to find out even as strong as our marriage is i wouldn't want to try to find out i wouldn't want to put that level of test to it and i think we'd have a way better chance than most people to to work through those things um you don't want to see me mad right no no but i I mean, it's just, I think we'd have a way better chance than most people to work through those things. You don't want to see me mad. Right, no. No. But, I mean, I think that there's this part of this stuff, though, that you have to understand. You have to figure out how much of a value are you going to put on sex. Yeah. I mean, that's really the big thing. At what point time does sex over have a higher value than your actual relationship and and that and that's really what it comes down to if you're not if you don't win that discussions i don't hate to say win because it shouldn't be a contest but if it doesn't if if your partner is never ready to make that step never ready to do that if you put sex you have to make a decision you have to make a decision do you value the sex is more important to you than the actual relationship there are people that i mean let you have you've had a hysterectomy there's always the risk with a hysterectomy that sex will hurt. Sex, you have no sex drive. Those are all things that can happen medically can happen. If you would have, we were fortunate that wasn't the case for you. Right. If we had not been in the lifestyle and that had happened to you, we're not swingers, I would not have just started to cheat on you i i wouldn't i would i would like to think we'd who knows what we'd have done but i would like to think that i would have said you know you can go find some before we were ever in the life so i'm like you want to find because i at that point didn't really care to give blowjobs i said if you find some girl to give you a blowjob or give you a blowjob i don't care i never tried that to see if it worked because I wasn't that point, didn't really care to give blowjobs. I said, if you find some girl to give you a blowjob, let her give you a blowjob. I don't care. I never tried that theory to see if it worked because I wasn't that dumb. You weren't that dumb. Do you not believe me? It's one thing to say it. It's another thing. Maybe that would have led to the lifestyle a hell of a lot sooner. Maybe it would have. Or maybe it would have led to a fucking frying pan upside my head because when I come and go, well, you said if I could find a chick that wanted to suck my dick, I found one and she sucked my dick. I was serious. There would have been some tears involved in that mess. The discussion would not have always just been, trust me, I can hear, well, you didn't ask if I, I was just kind of saying, and you didn't say that night you wanted your dick sucked. Don't even go there. Anyway, fucking clown. I'm just saying.
Speaker3:
It's just one of those things.
Speaker2:
You know you have five.
Speaker4:
I don't care.
Speaker2:
I can go as long as I fucking want.
Speaker4:
Anyway.
Speaker2:
I can. I know.
Speaker1:
It's your radio station.
Speaker2:
It's our show.
Speaker4:
I know.
Speaker1:
I kind of want to just.
Speaker2:
How do you think this new format thing went it rough really really because that's because people probably hate this show i mean we haven't very many people stand no no so no you threw me off when you're like well we're gonna bring it up this way and because we followed through on that no it was legitimate questions and stuff that i scene seen to cover the subject and you're like well we'll just do it this way we did it this way because there was a key to make sure that no one would be the people that had some questions follow up with it had are avid listeners and there was concern that it would we've so we've done this in the past we've altered the show to answer questions to protect people when they ask us to yes so but i thought we would try and i thought it went okay but apparently we'll see no it went fine oh yeah yeah we've had a huge crowd stay on the Facebook. Don't worry about Facebook.
Speaker4:
I always worry about it because we love our friends and fans on Facebook.
Speaker2:
I'm just saying.
Speaker4:
Okay.
Speaker2:
I don't know. I'm trying something new. We lived on the edge. We took a chance. We went for it.
Speaker4:
We lived on the edge.
Speaker2:
And we died.
Speaker1:
Anyways.
Speaker2:
All right.
Speaker1:
Yeah, yeah. With that being said.
Speaker2:
I figured you'd make up a question. What?
Speaker3:
I figured you'd make up a question.
Speaker1:
I told you. I told you.
Speaker3:
I know you did. Like a half hour ago.
Speaker2:
I followed you.
Speaker1:
We fucking went through it. We'll be right back. you'd make up a question what i figured you'd make up a question i told you i told you i know you did like i followed through i we fucking went through we had the meeting and i followed through exactly what i said was gonna happen in the meeting you're the one that just then when the the show started just looked at me like you'd never heard any of this but i don't know where i was i was supposed to say what we don't script No, we don't. So you can say whatever you want. I was just listening. I get that part. And I just fucking. I just listened. Why? Because it's fun to watch Cole sit here and just fucking swelter and try to fucking figure out how to. You weren't sweltering. It's a brand new format. Let's cool flounder and see how it goes. Let's watch the show, kids. Golf clap.
Speaker2:
Eight.
Speaker1:
We got lots of communicate we need to work on. Eight.
Speaker3:
I'm like, eight? What eight?
Speaker1:
The lifestyle's not gonna break up the show or break up the marriage, but the fucking podcast and changes that sure will it won't either yeah no we did not take minutes we should have obviously god thank god this is over alright well hall out for time. We got to go. Thank the good Lord for that one. I'm sure you'll all be excited to catch this show live again.
Speaker2:
No.
Speaker1:
We'll continue to fiddle. There's changes coming. We're going to fiddle with some shit.
Speaker3:
And that person wasn't the only one that has gone through this. That's what was big.
Speaker1:
Now you have shit to interject.
Speaker2:
Awesome. Thanks.
Speaker3:
Fuck off.
Speaker1:
We've got the next half hour. This is the Mr. Banda Show. Cool. I'm just fun with you. It's okay, pumpkin. Don't flick me off, damn it. Show some love. Seven. Six. Keep going. We're going to keep going lower. All right. Again, a shout out to our paid sponsors.
Speaker2:
Altplayground.net. Check them out. We're there. Why? Because we're everywhere. Elvis is everywhere. Someone said that last night. You're just like everywhere. Then it's like, oh, there's Casbah. I'm like going seriously.
Speaker1:
You know who else? Those look like Amanda's tits.
Speaker2:
I'm like, wait.
Speaker1:
You know who else knows that? All of our haters. These motherfuckers are everywhere.
Speaker2:
Dicks.
Speaker1:
So anyways, but altplayground.net. Don't forget to check out their meet and greets how do you meet people you go to meet and how do you greet people greets meet and greets good thing it's not meet and greet smell my feet because then you have to sniff people's nose that's weird uh anyways they've got events going on the 14th the 15th um a couple events the 14th one on the first is sold out all over the country alt altplayground.net. Also, remember, read, kids. It does your mind good. It makes you strong. You'll figure out and remember what those words sound like. Read out loud. Read for your others. Read to your kids.
Speaker2:
It's whatever.
Speaker1:
ASNLifestyleMagazine.com.
Speaker2:
Check it out.
Speaker1:
Three million swingers can't be wrong. Beat three million and one. And finally, hey, you just listened to a show. You know what uh you listen to a show read the mag come on fuckers let's buy some swag hey amy just showed up from hawaii or from uh mexico uh check us out you're in hawaii at full swap shop.com check it out today and don't get to listen to us on full swapap Radio. Until next time, doing it the only way I know how, the only way ever will, the only way where we're going to change fucking formats again is monkeys flying around my ass. Kazma Style, out.
