Send us Fan MailThis week we tackle communication and Trust. We answer questions that include truly communication about tough issues and how to make sure you are listening. Communicating in the lifestyle requires you are willing to hear things that might not make you happy! We also talk about broken rules and broken trust. A pregnancy s scare caused the truth to come out, what can the couple do now. Honest, and putting your relationship is the key in the lifestyle. We tackle this hard core topics in our own fun and fun but honest way. You will not want to miss this show!! Want to hear more of our shows? Check them out at: http://www.buzzsprout.com/181336Visit our sponsors at: http://www.altplayground.net http://www.asnlifestylemagazine.com http://www.fullswapshop.comVisit us at : http://www.krazykasbh.comYouTube : http://www.youtube.com/KasbhSend us emails at [email protected]: @TruthKrazyInstagram http://www.instagram.com/Krazy_Kasbh/Support the show (http://www.patreon.com/KrazyKasbhSupport the show
Transcript
Speaker1: Hey kids, the program you're about to listen to contains some adult situations, adult language, themes, and other adult topics. If you're easily offended, this show's not for you. Hey you crazy motherfuckers, welcome back to another edition of Crazy Truth. I'm the host with the most, I am Cole, and I'm here with the lovely, lovely, not so sure about her top because of her butt, Miss Amanda. Hey. And we are here to... Wait a minute. I was trying to read this. I was like, what? We're here to titillate, tantalate, turn out to hate, and all those other things that we usually say. Hey, so we're going to start right off by making a correction, because last week I said that it was episode 130 and i was totally fucking wrong uh so this is actually for you following along at home you're gonna be all fucked up in your handy dandy notebook get a new piece of paper out kids see this is why pen and paper is so much better than computerized you don't have to reprogram anything this is actually season three that part i had correct uh but this is what we're doing right now here and now as we speak is episode 129 i jumped all kinds of a head i said head um and uh yeah so stuff words and things uh so we're gonna do the sponsors first because i am focused we we actually here's the thing we actually have a tremendous show we have an opportunity opportunity. This is like a daytime Emmy-type show that we could have won an award on. This is that kind of a show if we do it right. Or we could sound like a couple fucking baboons. Either way. Anyway, so sponsors. Hey, altplayground.net, what are you doing? Why aren't you there? You wanted the best. You got the best. Sign the best sign up today we're there why because we're everywhere uh find us on there sign up on the put dirty pictures on the big wall find a bunch of horny people all over the country alt swing nope altplayground.net sign up today uh see as i remember they just had half a million, half a million dollars, half a million new fucking people joined just in the last couple of weeks. So don't miss out, kids. Jump on it. What the fuck are you doing? Speaker2: I was debating. Speaker1: That is totally like when you're checking your eyes out outside. Look, I need a picture because the sun makes me prettier. It's like, you're already super pretty. I know what makes my eyes sparkle more. Your eyes already sparkle. Speaker2: I don't ever say I know. Stop it. Speaker1: Anyways. I was looking to see if maybe my lens is dirty. Something's dirty on you, girl. Okay, but that was just one of our sponsors. Hey, remember what we always say. You can have a nice rack. You can have a nice ass. You can have a huge dick. But when you get old, all those things are going to fucking go away. But what will always make you hot is that you're smart. And how do you stay smart? Read, motherfuckers. That's right. Smart swingers read. Show your intelligence by signing up and subscribing to ASNLifestyleMagazine.com. Today, our good friends out there, 3 million horny motherfuckers, can't be wrong. Be one of the smart swingers. Keep you updated on all the newest hits and parades and positions and whatnot that's going on, ASNLifestyleMagazine.com. Finally, don't forget FullSwapShop.com. What is FullSwapShop.com, you might say? That is your one-stop shop to get all of your cool podcaster needs, and everybody has needs. We're here to fill your needs. Anyways, fill your needs at FullSwapShapshop.com today i got to tell you right now uh you know i well i'll talk about it later but um our our website is probably currently down it's probably if you go to crazycasma.com right now it probably says under construction uh because the new latest greatest biggest baddest fucking fire breathing motherfucker uh is gonna out there and you know what it's gonna do our our website will be like compared to other podcasters you know what it'll be like it'll kick them in the ass because that's what we do i'm kicking sorry guys for those of you that are our friends you know i'm just kidding for those of you that hate us fuck off uh so there you go so i got nothing i got you babe you know the smart ass thought process is that i can't verbalize you can verbalize no it's better i don't oh you'll get fucked later don't worry about it you get fucked i feel bad i know you're all pissing me about that it was a blue moon my it was all fucked up there was a miscommunication about i don't know. Nothing. What? Not a goddamn thing. We, you know, even though we're swingers, we put the swinging on hold for one weekend because we had to because we adopted over this weekend. And, you know, we take a lot of pride. And, obviously, you know, if you have the opportunity to adopt, you should adopt as well. So we actually adopted a two-and-a-half-year-old. So he is a beautiful little boy. Little. He's 125 pounds. He is a dog. That's right. We did adopt. He is, again, it's so nice to have another big dog. We love our little Jack. Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. Jack fucking jumped overie um because his name's willie uh jack's a chin pin so he's like 14 pounds and so the other dog that we have now his name is willie hey willie willie i don't know if that's gonna stick i don't know uh but willie is a great dane great pyrenees mix he's a big big boy big sweetie He's big like Dan He's fluffy like Great Pyrenees And he loves like a swinger Love me he's a big boy big sweetie whoo uh he's big like dan he's fluffy like great pyrenees and he loves like a swinger love me touch me so uh yeah so there you go yeah he can kind of be that way he he's not learned he's not learned consent quite yet and but the thing is is 135 pounds of like touch all he is, is 135 pounds. I haven't been able to pick him up to weigh him. Look, we went for a walk. The three of us went for a walk by ourselves unsupervised today. Literally, the three of us got tangled up in the leashes and we fell out of the house. I wish I really could have recorded that. Oh, it was awesome. It was a fucking three stooges because we had small, medium, and large. I was the largest fucking piling out of this fucking house. Looked like we all needed helmets. So we all just kind of laid there a minute going, ay. She's just so special. We're okay now. So, okay. So, actually, we don't have time to dick around tonight. This is a no dickery, doc. of the devil No Oh we got a problem Oh boy Yeah So when the cameras go on We don't have a problem at all Just don't look at them Uh huh No No No Willie No No Stay there Lay down Lay down Right now people that are not Okay if you don't follow along If you don't Join our fucking our fucking facebook page our secret facebook page you can see the show live uh it is uh crazy casbah don't tell the others it's a good secret show anyways okay so he's come over here because it's about time for him to burp he likes to burp and he's gonna knock my camera down smack it with his tail oh fuck me fuck me okay lay down oh willy willy okay so for those of you watch on the youtube channel when the camera Or when on, just lay down. Okay, lay down. Fuck me. Okay. Lay down. Oh, Willie, Willie. Okay. So for those of you who watch on the YouTube channel when the camera went on, just lay down. Okay. Lay down. We'll try to run to it as fast as we can. Okay. Anyway, so we don't have a lot of time. Hi, Willie. So we don't have a lot of time because we've got some hard, badass questions. Yes, we do. Okay. Okay. So which question do you want to start with? I don't care. Do you want to start with, well, one's a very specific example, one's a specific thing. Start in the order in which they were received, okay. No, I don't think, well, okay. So the first question, this question comes to us from Anonymous, okay, and here we go. How do you have a conversation about a difficult topic and explain how you're feeling without it looking like a personal attack or like you're jealous or controlling? I just want to understand. I just want to understand and help him to understand my perspective. I want to see his view on things without it going sideways and causing a huge fight now look we answer questions besides just questions that are that are my arm is going to be exhaustive jacking off i'm just petting the dog uh we answer questions that are not necessarily just specific a lifestyle specific question but this is still like it ties directly directly in because that's how the show works. Number one, what time did we start? I didn't write that down.
Speaker2:
It's a little late to be asking that now, isn't it?
Speaker1:
Yeah, a little bit.
Speaker2:
We're eight minutes into it.
Speaker1:
So what time is it right now?
Speaker2:
It's 7.46.
Speaker1:
So that would be 7.38 that we started. Okay, great. Anyways, okay. But, look, we talk about it and we preach and preach communication communication and and we say it and we preach it and we do it but here's the reality of it it is not an easy concept okay and anybody who tells you that they have it mastered is full of fucking shit because you never master the art of communication okay this is like the art of war you don't ever get it down that you got it perfect it doesn't fucking work that way okay uh oh there's a nose in the picture uh you know what quit touching him no he'll lay down okay or he'll rip my hand out of my socket anyway Anyway, so the thing is, okay, so communication, look, when you're communicating, well, do you want to jump in? You jump in. I don't want to step on your communication.
Speaker2:
Oh, fuck off. Finish your thought process.
Speaker3:
It's finished.
Speaker1:
I lost it. I didn't lose it, but. Well, I felt that the way the question was worded was very defensive okay and if you go into any conversation defensive it's going to turn ugly that's that's exactly right that no you're dead on i i don't know okay i don't necessarily say that it's defensive i would say that it was uh when you are super unsure of how to answer it or you're when you're unsure and it's very important it can come the step one to communication is the you have to understand why verbal is so important compared to uh email and text because you cannot get the connotation in which it was said you need you can't get body language physical right you can't there you go you can't get read body language you can't read the expressions you can't hear inflections whatever okay so you have understand those. The first step of communication is you have to understand those are a huge part of it. Okay. Look, so many times it happens to every couple. Couples like us that have been around together forever and a day, eternity and a half. And it just hasn't been enough time yet. And couples that are brand new and all points in between. There are times you go into a conversation geared for war. Okay? If you know what a war horse is, okay, and it's not the old lady, it's not your mother-in-law. A war horse is a horse that was trained specifically for war. You could ride a war horse. They used a war horse for regular day-to-day riding, but when they put its armor on, it signaled to the horse that it was time to go to war, and it became aggressive, and it totally changed what it did. It's the same thing with a conversation. If something is important to you and you truly want to get to understand the other person's point of view, You need to understand what is your body language saying when you're going into it what is your eyes saying what is your facial expression saying how are your hands being held how is your arms being held what point in time when do you bring it up these are all things that you have to go into this as if you're planning for a war you have to be organized and and thought out but you have to make sure that everything you're doing is not aggressive that is so fucking important you can't be aggressive if you truly want to find out someone else's point of view and different things set different people off yes personality yes it's huge and and the reality of it is if you look if you're in a conversation with somebody that you know pretty well you know what sets them off and and i'm going to tell you this and i'm going to say it and people aren't going to like it, but it's called crazy truth, not crazy what you want to hear. Crazy truth says if you, when you know they're hot buttons, if you knowingly push those fucking buttons, you are not trying to get to common ground. You're trying to win. Communicating is a shit ton like sales. Okay old way back in the day years and years ago was the salesman was trying to win i'm going to take you for everything i can i win you lose okay the new way sometimes you'll make the mistake is i lose everything and you get everything okay the reality of it to be successful in sales is we both win we find common ground we both win communication is the exact same way I don't want to win I will win when we're both communicating we're both happy and hugging and smiling because we're both speaking the same language I don't want getting the upper hand is not communicate that won't make me happy and I also don't want to fucking whore myself out and give everything away and just be subservient to somebody else and lose you have to find a common ground I say it all the time as a wedding part of a successful marriage is uh doing little things like knowing when to listen to your spouse and when to stand your ground and knowing when to do each. There is the fucking key. Knowing when to do each and being willing to swallow your ego, swallow your pride when you start to overstep. We do it all the time. Right now, you're pissed at me. I don't know why. You makes a good show how about now okay last week's flip on my nipple it still hurts it still hurts see she was pissing me so the thing is though and so once she was pissing me i had to take a step back and i had to be like i'm'm sorry. I fucked up and I had to acknowledge that I fucked up, which I did, didn't I? Because I had. OK, now I could have been a douche fuck and continue to try to hold my ground because I didn't want to let my ego to have to fucking kind of kowtow to you a little bit. But you know what? What would that accomplish? You'd still be pissed at me. Now I can go honk honk and grab your nipple and you're just like afraid but but we giggle about it now but we wouldn't have right that's the reality of this so okay that's the first part know what you're fucking no no have your fucking head out of your ass number two have a plan if look there's some things in life you you talk about with each other and it just how that however the conversation goes it goes and it's just communicating it's fun and that's that's what couples do if something is very very serious and it's something that is huge and important to you have a plan have your points written out for you now don't tell me no i don't necessarily agree that you have to have a plan because then you're expecting it to go fuck off so you're expecting it to go the way you want it no no no no i did not say have a map i said have your points written out that is so that you don't forget your points because here's the deal when you get to you start to start to reach an understanding, you can't go, oh, wait, hold on, I forgot. By the way, you suck at this. No, you can't go back. You need to make sure because whatever your thought was, probably all the points build to a common denominator. So it's important that you express all of those things. So if you have to think on the fly, you're fucked. Not you. No, I would be. But most people, if they have to think on their fly, on the fly. On their fly? What? Flies. They're fucked. Look at me. You say all the time how, like, I don't script shit out, right? I don't ever do that, right? No, you don't. But how many times have I fucked up shit about my sponsors because I just do it? I just do it. You do. But if I have it written out and I read it, how often do I fuck it up? You don't, but it sounds like you're reading it. Well, but there's nothing wrong. That's true. But sometimes there's nothing wrong with it being to be able to say, this is so important to me. I really want to get these things, and I want to hear how, and here's the key. I need to tell you this, and you need to say it. I really want to get these things and i want to hear how and here's the key i need to tell you this but i really really you need to say it i really want to hear how you feel about these points if you get all of your points out first so that you're not interrupting you're not listening for anything other than to listen then you go and then you turn the floor over to the person you care about and say, now I want to hear your opinions. Right. At which point in time, the next thing that comes with that is, shut the fuck up. It's one of the other things, one of the other lost arts with listening is not talking. It's shutting up. and they're 99% of the time the problem falls there we are all great at getting our points out wouldn't you agree you see what I'm doing here right I'm making sure so you can make something as cold as ever shut up well I'm like trying to see if you're keeping on topic. Thanks, Pumpkin. Well, I think one thing that needs to be said because it's obviously a male and female. Wait, what? Are you sure? Yes, because she said he. Yeah, okay. Okay. Just checking. What a lot. I would assume it's common sense, but men and women think absolutely nothing alike. So if you're trying to explain it as a woman and he's not getting it, you might try to see if you can explain it like a dude. Yeah. And guys, we need to try to listen. We need to try to look at it from a woman's perspective. It goes down to something very simple. It's the concept of picking a movie.
Speaker3:
Okay?
Speaker1:
We go, well, why do you want to watch a boring chick flick? Well, why do you want to watch just a bunch of fucking testosterone crap? So you try to find an action film with a love story in it. You try to find a win middle ground. It's the same thing with a topic about trying to understand their point of view. Look, here's the biggest challenge with this. Hear my words. They're true. We all do everything with good intentions. That's our goal. Our intention is we want to find out what each other's opinions and views are. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. We start off wanting to do that, but being able to keep doing that 40 minutes into the conversation when it's not going the way you want it to, or when you're hearing shit you don't want to hear is a totally different ball game. And there's the challenge. It's to be able to take and take your look. If you're going to have a conversation with somebody and you're going to ask questions and you're going to you truly want to hear their point of view, you need to understand you might not like what they have to say. So here's the deal. If you fight back at that. You lose the conversations over. OK, so for those of you guys all know that we have the secret page and I love this because i'm looking at the people that we have on our page they're watching live right now okay we have people all different number of years of marriages and all different age groups of people currently watching uh and a topic like this for couples that are brand new they go well we don't have don't have those type of issues. So it's not, we talk about everything. We're in love, doves of love. Or people that have been together a long time ago, well, we always talk. We know what we're doing. We don't have this kind of stuff. Let me help you out with something. You need it the most. The young people and the old people, you need it the most. At 28 years being together, the need to work and be conscious of our communication skills has never been greater than it is right now. Because here's the deal. We have no distractions anymore. Our kids come and visit and sometimes we hope they don't come over okay seriously so we don't have our conversation we don't have the conversation of all the stupid shit that happened at school if we don't want to talk to each other at dinner we can't just let the kids babble about some fucking junior high or high school bullshit we have to deal with each other because either you're at work and i'm here working or we're together and we have to deal with each other and we have lived i've watched it with my own family we have lived and watched people that as they as couples get close to that 30 40 50 years you know they don't know how to talk because the kids are gone they don't they have to deal with each other i know bitch and so and the thing is is that that's a motherfucker so to think that the communication it seemed harder when we were younger because well we were struggling and had to pay bills and we had to fucking try to feed the kids and the kids are screaming and they sucked and why didn't we use a condom and all those fucking things right but we had distractions you don't like them we we had distractions we never you the amount of time that we had to deal with each other was minimal very true so now that's why if you look at the demographics of swinging why so many people in our age range get into the lifestyle they're looking to spice them up because you know what they're looking for something new because they don't have soccer games and football games and band and fucking choir and and just that we were also odd how many people talk to their spouse at work multiple times a day true it's only because i tried to give you a fake number that one time and i'm kidding i'm good we we are because we do love to talk to talk to each other and we it was like picking up the dog you know that was eight hours in a car yeah and you know what it went really fast it went really fast even with a big dog sticking his head up in there because we talked and we like to do that that you slept that's well i was tired and earned every bit of it. Anyways, so that's the game. That's the challenge. There is not a set answer to give Anonymous on how to communicate this. All I can tell you is open your mind. Okay, we're going to do a little kid thing here. God gave you one mouth, two ears, two eyes. That means you need to look and listen more than you need to talk. If you truly will base the understanding off of that, you'll figure it out.
Speaker2:
But also try to understand their point of view too.
Speaker3:
Because if it's something that, what did she say, be like a personal attack or to make it come across that you're jealous, there's. You have to be willing to start pulling back. You have to recognize when it's starting to go south and pull back and the best thing to do is give somebody else give the control over to them to get their point of view when it starts to go south let them speak that's the best thing to do right okay all right we're gonna take a quick break because we're right we're right almost at midpoint uh yeah so what i did just say by the way so make sure you visit our website it should be up the new one hopefully in about a week we can have crazy casbah.com you want to check that out also get ready kids there's a big old fucking announcement coming big things in the works uh we're gonna be able to find our show in more places than ever before or everywhere elvis is everywhere man elvis is everywhere uh anyways so uh get ready. And also, don't forget, go to Full Swap Shop, get stuff. We now have a 135-pound child. He needs to eat, so please buy some shirts. I'm just kidding. That's funny. You're busy eating smart. You're not even listening. Okay, back to the show. Now, look, that one was easy. That was an easy easy question when it comes to trying to explain communication nothing's easy nothing's easy but no no no this motherfucker buckle your seatbelt kids here we go okay i don't know why okay you don't know why what why it's not never am i go on are you sure yeah are you kicking into i know what you said you are you gonna be like a bitch motor how are you gonna do this no okay oh here we go this will get interesting okay uh this question we actually just got this question uh today and so it was it wasn't planned but uh the question i originally had planned i put off so that that, hi, Willie, so that we could, because I felt like this question was a big deal. So first and foremost, I know that they are listening to the show. Understand as we crack jokes. Again, I always tell people we do this because to make it more fun, but obviously this one's pretty serious, really, I think. So I got a question fromott and kelly and hold on one second i've got fucking 130 pound pounds ripping curtains down holy fucking shit wow uh okay so um anywho uh so scott and kelly sent us this question, or Scott sent it, but here it is.
Speaker1:
We are swingers, and I was working out of town last month for four days. Kelly asked me if it would be okay to play with a regular play partner. I said yes. She broke two rules. One, he did not wear a condom, and two, he came inside of her. She just told me three weeks later. So, uh, here's the deal. So I reached out to Scott and I asked him a couple of questions. how long they've been in the lifestyle, and what caused her to come forward, if it was, and my thing was, was it a pregnancy scare, so the response back, they have been in the lifestyle for five years and what did cause this whole thing to uh come out three weeks later son of a bitch uh was was the fact that it was a pregnancy scare and they're asking for our help uh they did say that they have never there's never been any rules broken before you want to start daddy knows of Thank you. help uh he did say that they have never there's never been any rules broken before you want to start daddy knows of daddy knows of do you want to start holy shit get out your handy dandy notebooks because we got we got multitudes of issues here happening well what do you do if a rule's been broken i will start with the simple simplistic part no uh i the the number one i don't think you can start with that you don't think no with that no i don't think you can even start with the fact that just a rule was broken i think you back up and start that who the rule was broken with to me is the first fucking problem because she asked if she could play with a regular play partner okay okay so this is someone that they have played with before this is not a first time this was not a first time thing they weren't new and this person she broke the rules with this person so the question then instantly that comes in my mind is have the rules ever been followed how often have the rules been broken because obviously if they've played together in the past you are we're going to go out and assume that that the rules are have been known sorry our whole studio is walking around the room okay no he can't so the but we're going to assume that the whole that the rules are well known at this point yeah so doesn't that regular pay partner should know what the rules And well-known at this point. Yeah. So doesn't that raise... And a regular pay partner should know what the rules are. And should respect it. Mm-hmm. If you're a regular pay partner, there should be zero problem going... It shouldn't even come up, hey, well, this time, can we go ahead and just not follow those? I mean, it shouldn't even... We play all the time. These are the rules when we play, and we go play and we go on well the thing is is that so when you were first telling me about it the first thing that came to my mind was you could if you if there's a pregnancy scare you're obviously fertile yeah yeah and somebody on our page asked how old how old and i don't know their is. So, you know, it's like, well, is she purposely trying to get pregnant? Does he not want to have a kid, but she does, so she can accidentally get pregnant by somebody else? But if that's... But that's just trying to come up with all scenarios, because who knows? Maybe they just felt comfortable, or she felt like she was in the clear, which I still wouldn't play with fire like that and there becomes so to me there's the second major problem is that part of being in the lifestyle we say this all the time on this fucking show this is the most adult activity that you can do take a, so take a step back. When we first got into the lifestyle, we knew absolutely nothing. And we used to cam on a webpage, right? They're not sponsors, so we don't say their names. Whatever. So one of the things that we had people that would talk to us then. Imagine that. We had like a little show. I don't know what, no idea. What the fuck? but they used to one guy would talk to us and imagine that we had like a little show i don't know what i no idea what the fuck um but they used to one guy would talk about how this one girl always wanted to hook up because she wanted him to get her pregnant now we know there's a kink right right there's a kink with there's a kink thing out there with it but she legitimately wanted to get pregnant and then later told him that she wanted to get right but now here's my thing is i don't know i don't think that that's the case with this only because if she was scared of being pregnant to tell him that's true okay here's what the part of this that i think is a raises one red flag is grow the fuck up you're fertile you know that you can have kids if you're not taking precautions accordingly number one if your rule is a condom okay then you should be there that should be a no-brainer but pause because what if it was a oops she's on birth control but then took an antibiotic and could get pregnant and oopsie. But then there's the rule breaking part. Well, that's a whole bunch of different scenarios. The bottom line is, is that she's not, she was not being responsible for her body. She knew that she could have kids. What I'm saying is if it was an accident, I get that. No, but i get that but then yet why were the rules being broken right and i guess to me i look at that as an immaturity thing breaking look when it's a you're talking about a planned a planned approved event it wasn't like a i had too much to drink that's just that randomly happened which does not make something right but this was a planned thing so to me she didn't break rules she ignored rules that's how i would feel if it was me and i okay here's the thing obviously kelly we don't know you okay so understand that this is an attack but it is what it is i if i was scott if i was in his shoes i would feel like that those rules and because those are big rules like you didn't you didn't break the rule of you stayed out too late you didn't break the rule of you you know i don't know you ate dinner together afterwards you broke the rule of wrapping your dick and coming those are pretty big fucking rules there's been times that we've had a person that we've hooked up with where i said i want you to wear a condom and one time i was fucked up me i want you to wear a con want him to wear a condom okay and then both times it didn't happen and but we came clean right then and there there was nothing to hide no we both broke a rule that we had set for each other and we acknowledged it right right on the spot and and that's the other thing is that because i could have said no or yeah he did use a condom you'd never know there's no chance i could get pregnant well and and here's the thing and and it came up across the board i said somebody said well the stds is a possibility there's a lot of ways that it could have come that the truth could come out even even though you couldn't get pregnant i mean you know you can still get an std whatever right and and yes here here's the biggest thing is is is breaking a rule happens Because we're human, we make mistakes. Okay. Even though to me, I'm pretty harsh on this one because I don't, I don't, I, I, I, yeah. To me, it just, that, that's too convenient. If you use a condom with everybody. Right. Then there's, or wait a minute. So if the issue was I broke a rule with coming in her and not wearing a condom so if a guy's wearing a condom can he still come in her or does he have to take it out i would say that it's pull out and there's a lot of people like that as a double protection because she's a childbearing age okay okay i mean no i just never heard it all of a sudden i'm like wait a minute no i i've i've seen that before but and and here's the thing when you i can actually I can't believe I'm like, wait a minute. No, I've seen that before. But, and here's the thing. I can actually, I can't believe I'm going to say this. I'm going to get crucified for this. I can actually see getting caught up in the moment and you start fucking and it's like, oh, fuck. We didn't put a condom on. Okay, but you know at some point in time in there. You definitely, don't tell me you got so caught up, you forgot to put put a condom in and then you just fucking kept forgetting until you blew your load one of the two of you should have had your fucking heads out of your asses my thing with this is just never asked if alcohol was involved no i i didn't the bigger the bigger red flag to me than than breaking the rule let's just say hypothetically there was a little booze they didn't see each other forever oh my god things just totally got out of hand we're gonna we're gonna take every red flag and we're gonna shove it to the side there's one red flag we can't shove aside she wasn't honest after the fact and here's the thing three weeks later when you're scared into it is not being honest three weeks later when you feel guilty because you can't sleep is not being honest being honest is going fuck as soon as he leaves calling up on the phone and say yeah we hooked up i fucked up yeah i'm sorry that's being honest now even then look you can't just apologize your way out of fucking fucking up no but when you don't when you don't kudos to scott because to be perfectly honest i think if i did that to you you would leave me uh you would leave and i would probably be tempted to leave you wouldn't leave but we we would be having some serious knockdown drag out yes you're damn right we might be sleeping and one of us be in a hotel probably you you'd probably go fuck you and go sleep in a hotel until we worked it out at least no i i wouldn't go that harsh because after 28 years you can you you've got a boyfriend you you've got we don't have a boyfriend no well you've got you got guys in the batting cage there you go which failed today but that's beside the point that's because he's a big time car salesman now um now you lost my train of thought you fuck what no you wouldn't be that severe after 28 years oh but there probably wouldn't be any lifestyle play no they're absolutely in fact it would be like no we're stepping back you're cutting that shit off but until we figure this out or until we come up with new rules or i'm gonna make sure this is not gonna happen yeah yeah and and i'm right there with you i agree 100 then and it wouldn't even be we're breaking out we're stepping away from from playing alone it would be all together we need to fucking reevaluate reevaluate because you do at this point in time the it hurt me when i read this, a pregnancy scare. So it was okay once you were scared enough to go, oh, well, now that I'm a good chance I'm going to get caught, I'm going to be honest. Well, you know what? Why not just keep the lie going? Yeah. You know, oh, my God, look, we got pregnant. Woo. You know what I mean? Must have been a hole in the condom. Yeah. You know, because don't know maybe he maybe he can't maybe he's he can't get pregnant or he can't get pregnant but you know what i mean so but to do not fertile but to do that the the even after five years even after us in 10 years even with people that have been in 20 years when that level of trust and i'm watching on the board as on our screen roll by and people are going trust being broken when that level of trust is broken seriously it is time to step back completely now you don't have to make a big announcement and you don't have to do all that bullshit but your number one focus needs to be on your relationship because how do you trust if you travel for work if that was if that was us and i was still and i traveled for work and it happened while i was on the road it'd be pretty damn hard to trust me the next business trip i mean i mean there would there would be that little bit of doubt in the back of your head right going what in the hell? Sterile was the word I was looking for. Yeah, sterile, there you go. But I mean, and that's the thing. I mean, you sit here and it's like, look, if you... These rules... Maybe they got into the lifestyle because he does travel, but I don't know. i mean i mean that could be but still i mean that doesn't give her any excuse of of what happened but here's what's said we have seen this recently on a couple different things and and to me the number one thing you have to do when severe rules broken. Look, we've each broken minor rules. And you talk about it, you work through it. But even then, we didn't play again until we worked through those issues. Well, it didn't take us that long to work through it. Because we talked about it right away, and we go on for a week nonstop. Right, yeah, until we get it solved. It was solved but i've seen we've seen it with some other couples it's like some serious breaches of trust and the thing is is what what about the other guy not that you know when we've hooked up with somebody that i go ah she's awfully young um i'm pretty sure she's fertile so i just ignore it and blaze on keep that in mind i don't want somebody to come back asking for child support well if they know me they'll know i'm broken they'll get absolutely nothing welcome to the casbah way no welcome to my no it's true well the thing is is is i i do believe i do believe that the play partner i believe uh the poop and stool is no i'm sorry and forgive me for the new pigmies in the beginning. Uh, anyways, I do believe that the, the play partner has some responsibility in the breaking of the rules. Now the fucking up of the relationship, that's maybe that's all her. Maybe that play partner didn't know what the rules were that he was supposed to wear a condom. If they've played before. But you're assuming that he's used a condom before. I'm assuming. No, I'm assuming she's been honest and told them. So, yeah, you're exactly right. He might not have known the rules from the get go. Well, and here's the other reality. Maybe they maybe they don't care. Maybe there's something else going on there. I't know. But, I mean, no, you're exactly right. We have to. And see, folks, this is why honesty and communication is so fucking very important. Look at all the questions this raised just as we're sitting here talking. Well, did the guy ever know what the rules? Did she ever tell him the rules? You know? Yeah. How many other many other times is he breaking her i know he's saying that the rules have never been broken but that's as far as he knows and up until recently scott went three weeks without knowing the rules were broken so look and and scott and kelly i know you guys are listening to this and i want you guys to to understand. We are not sitting there telling you, get a divorce, fuck her. No, what we're telling you is, look, you, at this moment in time, your new number one priority is each other, is to completely, when I say completely, I mean completely get away from lifestyle. no meet and greets no fucking hotel parties no fucking hotel parties no fucking no fucking uh get off the fucking swingers websites if you have to which you don't have necessarily leave just take breaks from them whatever no you don't have to leave take a break but you focus on youtube because there's obviously something to massively work on there is and and here's the thing but understand okay it having been a former smoker okay uh dirty fucking smoker and knowing a lot of people that are that are recovering addicts and and alcoholics you can't you're it's either you're in or you're out. And what I mean by that is, look for you, I smoked for 30 years, 30 fucking years I smoked and I quit multiple times. And the, what I would, what would I do wrong? You get to that point, you go, well, I can just have one cigarette. I can control it. You know what you can't do? You can control it and what do i mean by that what i mean is well we're gonna work on us we're just us but we can still go to a meet and greet or we can still go no you can no stop i don't agree with you there you can go to a We're going to have some communication issues, aren't we? No, that is communication.
Speaker2:
Hello. I think you can still go and do things as a couple. Yes. Just as a couple. You can go to a bar. You can go to a meet and greet, but you hang around with each other and you don't let go.
Speaker1:
I agree with that. But let me ask you this, because you know, you're exactly right. You're 100% right. See how I did that, guys? See anonymous for the first question.
Speaker4:
See how I did that?
Speaker1:
I agreed. I empowered. And now I'm going to say, but why be around the temptation for the flirting, the touching, a few cocktails, and then where I'm out in the back room making out with some girl, seriously, or, or wait, I'm not done, or even worse, Scott getting a little pissed and going, turn and go, you owe me. I'm going to go do this. Pause. So when you go around people that smoke, does that, no. I only lick them. Shit, I need to back that up. So because you were a former smoker and because you still have addictive personality and because you're still very tempted by cigarettes, would you go around people that smoke? I do, but I take heroin with me instead. I got a little too giddy for that one. Smoking is a little bit different. Well, just because you go to a meet and greet doesn't mean you're going to throw somebody on the floor and fuck them. No, I'm, okay, let's use heroin as a better example shall we hey you know what heroin no and coke but i've never done heroin so the thing is is so you you're a recovering heroin addict it's super it's super addictive so you know you can still go hang out with fucking people shooting up you're just gonna sit there slobbering the corner shaking because you want it so fucking bad. Yeah. Are there times... Okay, let's use your smoking example. This will be better. Wait. No, let's use your smoking example. The sex puts you into that kind of a mindset that you have to fuck right away. It can. Let's put it this way. I can be around people that are smoking, but should I go outside with them when they go on a smoke break every time? Here's the thing. You're a couple. Why not fuck each other? You can, but why be around some fucking hot chick that's fucking flirting around with her big titties bouncing out at you? We're not going to agree. There is no way on God's green earth, if this was us, there is no way. No, we wouldn't be like no no no no swing or anything exactly if i said well look we'll just go as a couple and only fuck us so we can still go to the meet and greet right you'd be like fuck no we're gonna just we're gonna sit here and cuddle and watch movies dick because you can't follow the rules there is no way you're gonna do this so you're sitting here telling these people, go do what we never would. No, no, I'm not saying that.
Speaker2:
I'm not saying don't do anything. You're saying you have to drop everything. You don't have to. You still can go to events that don't involve sex, like knocking that thing over. But what I'm saying is, is that, well, I don't know.
Speaker1:
If you, wait, wait a minute. If you were Scott minute if you were Scott if you're the dude in this situation no let's just say it's us and I was the one that broke all these rules horribly and so you don't know what I'm telling the truth on and what I'm not and I go I'm going to go to the bathroom I'll be right back and I go to the bathroom I disappear but I'm gone for like 20 minutes well there happens a legitimate 20 or 30 minutes there's a legitimate be a line when I get back Thank you. and I go to the bathroom, I disappear. But I'm gone for like 20 minutes. Well, there happens a legitimate 20 or 30 minutes. There's a legitimate, it'll be a line. When I get back, what is your initial, what is the first thing you're going to say to me? Did you forget what it was like when we first joined the lifestyle? What are you going to say to me? Answer that. I was drunk. We went everywhere together. We did. the bathroom so you would basically what so it's not so you start off as newbies and cling on to each other like you have no well okay so then at what point in time when does that trust get how long does it take to get that trust back oh because because here's the thing remember i mean and i i'm legitimately asking she lied for three fucking weeks and she would have kept lying if the fucking blood would have started flowing literally literally i don't know because i've never been in that situation right because you sure as You sure as fuck aren't going to admit it on the air now. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm fucking. I've never been in that situation. No. My saying to you from the very first time I met you is don't ever lie to me. That's right. If you tell me the truth and it hurts my feelings feelings i'd rather you hurt me now for me to get over it versus finding out later and thank god i'm a great line i'm just there's a couple times you lied over minor things and believe it or not i caught a youtube t-shirt that was a bad one but yeah yes it wasn't youtube it was you too yeah no and you're exactly right in the casino and the the thing is and and you know what here's the reality of and you're exactly right because and maybe that would be the way to the way to go look scott and kelly you know your relationship because i mean how would you trust well you said it earlier never's the thing. If he has to go on work, you're going to have to find some way to trust her while you're gone. Well, and here's the thing. You guys know your relationship. I can tell you this. Most of the time, most relationships, they're worth the effort. I guess that's the biggest thing. You know, I know right now, Kelly, you might listen to this and feel like, well, you're getting really bagged on. You fucked up. Yeah. Okay. So, and again, and again, we're the crazy truth. We're not the crazy what you want to hear. Okay. You fucked up. It is what it is. But I can tell you, there's obviously still some love there. There's something there. So spend the time, time take the time figure out what works for you guys to work on it don't throw look don't become a victim of the lifestyle uh just go well fucking it's just easier no easier isn't better great things are worth working for you have to there's going to be a lot of analyzing a relationship to find out why you lied. There are some people that lie to their spouse because they will go off on them in public. We've seen it. We're like, oh my gosh, they fight. Oh, they fight all the time. Okay. Well, that's not anything fun. Um, but it's how they will react yeah um so i understand there's there's different scenarios but y'all really have to analyze the relationship and and figure out why it happened and what you can do not to regain trust and that's a big key Why did it happen? Analyze it. Doug put a great thing. And a lot of people put great comments. Sorry we haven't been reading all your guys' comments out loud, but you get a lot of great comments. Doug put, if there was nothing there, he probably wouldn't have asked the question. And that's exactly right. The love is still there. And here's the thing. The other thing guess it can be rebuilt absolutely now the reality of it is is it's gonna take a lot of very mature people here to do this you guys are gonna have to be mature and what i mean by that is kelly you're gonna have to be very mature and you're gonna have to take your medicine and guess what it's that pill is the size of a fucking freight train and it tastes nasty as fuck, but you got to take your medicine. Scott, if you love her, you got to, you got to work through, you got to be honest with your feelings, but you got to work through the anger. You have to remember anger and frustration and hurt is not a great place to work for from, you have to be honest acknowledge it and kelly you have to understand that he's going to be and he has every right to be a little bit fucking pissed off right but if you both want it now you have to take and be very mature and you have to work through it and that means maybe you have to get some help other than podcasters and i mean well i mean honestly i it it's humbling that you would ask us this question how we could help you but this is a situation that maybe you need to involve some professional folks that do this for a living and but it needs if you do that you need to be honest with them about the situation. Which means, remember, there's patient-doctor confidentiality. You need to be honest and say the scenario, the swingers and the whole nine yards. Be honest. Get the help you need. They're not there to judge. Yeah, they're not there to judge. And get the help you need. But sometimes people like Miss Amanda and i and other podcasters and your friends and family we mean well we can give you some pointers but we're not professionally trained to be marriage counselors we're not professionally trained to give you all the answers so you know don't take this lightly it's it's you know if you get a small scratch and and when you're growing up grandma threw mud and poo on it and and some honey and wrapped up and you were healed great uh if you have a gashing fucking wound all the way down your arm you know what maybe go ahead and go see a doctor and let them take care of it and and i have a feeling there is more of a gashing wound here than you might think right now. And the other thing I'm going to tell you is whatever you guys choose to do, whether you choose to get help or work out yourself, however, make sure you get all the way to the core of the problem. You know, I watch on youtube this guy uh he's the hoof doctor okay so this it's all these videos of him working on cow hooves he's like an awesome he's a scotsman okay and and shooing them and peeling the you know like grinding off and fixing all this shit on these hooves okay okay and one of the things i've learned from watching this shoot this show besides how to fucking grind a cow's hoof uh is that how a little black dot on the bottom of the hoof looks like nothing just like almost like the size of a pinhole but it's the indicator that the whole inside of that hoof is filled with pus and it has a problem and that you have to get every bit of it out there. And you know what? When you're dealing with trust and love and a relationship, a marriage, and especially when you have the lifestyle involved with it, it can look just like a little dot. But there can be a whole lot of hurt and anger and other.
Speaker2:
There can be a massive underlying.
Speaker1:
There can be other things there. And here's the thing. I think you'll agree with me. If you don't get all of those things out, it's not actually going to heal. It's just going to refill up. It's just going to re-fester. You have to get all that out.
Speaker2:
Put a Band-Aid on it, but you're better to get to the root of it.
Speaker3:
Yeah.
Speaker1:
So please, please do that, folks. Thank you. fill up it's just going to re fester you have to get all that put a band-aid on it but you're better to yeah get to the root of it yeah so please please do that folks that's uh hopefully that that helps so all right so uh there you go look at us going and either hopefully we didn't just add to a divorce but you know what are you gonna do so we didn't hope not anyways uh again hey let's give a shout out again to our sponsors again thank you uh and make sure you go sign up alt playground.net uh find us there find us here find us there find us everywhere uh alt alt playground.net you can be part of our community listen to the show see us touch us feel us smell us whatever you want to do probably want to smell us but I use a great clone uh i'll play ground.net today and remember soft supple skin perky boobies high and tight nuts all those things change when you get old you'll get wrinkly your tits will sag and your ball sack drips but you know what your brain power is always there and that's sexy as fuck and smart swingers are are sexy swingers so read today and join and subscribe to our friends at asn lifestyle magazine I don't know. Brainpower is always there, and that's sexy as fuck. And smart swingers are sexy swingers. So read today and join and subscribe to our friends at ASNLifestyleMagazine.com. Remember, three million horny motherfuckers can't be wrong. And finally, FullSwapShop.com. Hey, say it again, kids. FullSwapShop.com. Visit it today. Get all your fucking podcast needs Remember, it's the holiday season It's the holiday season And you know what? Nothing says Merry Christmas Like a big fuck you sticker Or a crazy casket shirt Or a front porch swinger shirt Or a kinky frame of mind Or flamingos Or the naked relationship stuff So it makes great gifts And it will definitely make the conversation at Christmas I'm sorry. kinky frame of mind or flamingos or the naked relationship stuff so makes great gifts and it will definitely make the conversation at Christmas just all that much better so visit there today finally if you want to find us you can find us all over the place we're everywhere man you can find us on YouTube join you can either join and be a hater but we got some of those join or like our shit either way That would be www.youtube.com backslash Kazba, K-A-S-B-H. You can find us on Twitter, at Truth Crazy, because I'm original. You can find Miss Amanda's Naked Cooter on OnlyFans.com backslash Miss Amanda Kazba. Naked Cooter. Yep. You can also find us on Pornhub where she's sucking and putting things in her cooter and her mouth. I'll find there. Just look up Kazba on the model section there, whatever. You know, find us there. We're on Instagram. Don't remember what it is, but I'm sure it's really good. I post there on occasion.
Speaker2:
Crazy.Kazba.
Speaker1:
What she said. And finally, send us emails at crazy.Kazba, K-a-s-b-h uh at gmail.com i've got the rest of it so until next time doing it the only way we know how the only way we will oh by the way real quick don't forget to vote be a good citizen uh doing the only way and how the only way we want to the only way we ever fucking will casbah style out
