The Art of Teasing

Transcript

This program contains strong sexual content. No one under the age of 18 is permitted to listen to or download the podcast in any matter. The host, guest, and performers all over the age of 18 rebroadcasting this podcast in any manner is strictly prohibited without the written consent of the owners of the Hot White Podcast. The commentary of this program is is the sole opinion of its hosts or guests and does not reflect that of the opinion of the Hot Wife Podcast's owners, agents, or representatives. This podcast is not meant to be taken as professional advice.

Hi, this is Donna Lynn, and welcome to my Hot Wife Podcast, where we discuss all the good, the bad, and the really erotic of the swinger lifestyle. Hello, everybody. This is Donna Lynn, and welcome to my Hot Wife Podcast. I'm just turning off my phone here, because because if i don't somebody will call and or something will happen exactly there'll be some kind of interruption it would just be my luck so welcome everybody again i'm here with my wonderful husband vince hey so we're not going to get the phone call from publishers queer house telling us we won like a day.

Well, let me turn my phone off. If that's the case, I'm going to turn the back. Fuck the podcast. Publishers Clearinghouse, yeah. I have never won anything in my life. Certainly not that. I don't think anybody's won anything from there that I know of. I've never heard of it. I mean, I keep seeing all the commercials for the big giant checks. Oh, I just won $5 million. I won a big cardboard check. Anyway. Hey, I want to... Thank you.

the big giant checks oh i just won five million i want a big cardboard check anyway uh hey i want to give a a quick little thing a thing yeah what kind of thing are you giving well he said quick and little i don't know you might need to get some penicillin after i give it to you um no just uh with the stuff going on over there in the middle east um just uh just want to Thank you.

No, just with the stuff going on over there in the Middle East, just when it's not getting political, I'm not going to – I have my choice asides, but I'm just going to say, you know, just everybody, quick, you know, a little prayer for peace over there and all this complete madness and brutality. Yeah. So just, you know, as serious as I'll get. Okay. Carry on. Okay. So tonight's topic? Well, what's going on? We haven't hit this in a while. You hit the cards, huh? I thought you gave that up. I gave a lot of things up.

Sometimes they come back you know like alcohol like alcohol okay this is a good question oh it's a good question it's a box of cards we have that have various questions or just tabletop conversation starters okay so and this is they're non-sexual okay but we can make it sexual you can make anything sexual come on yes I can hammer that nail baby hammer that nail I don construct you. I was like, really? You've got to fucking make everything sexual. Plumb that board, you bitch. Plumb it. Come on. Let's go screw on the deck. Make it upright. Come on. Make it upright.

Make it it up right okay in which activity would you like to have a lesson from an expert that's the question it's not sexual but yeah we'll make it sexual and that's just one i grabbed out of the box oh my god jeez i don't know how to even answer that one without getting sexual. No, make it sexual. That's fine. That's fine. I mean, again, I don't know who the expert would be. Well, I was thinking if I was to get any kind of sexual expertise from anybody, it would be probably somebody like Nina Hartley. Oh, okay. You know?

Yeah, she's made a lot of money on uh videos and stuff like that self-help well she has videos like to teach women how to give a blow job right right i bought that for you um should be here any second um you're you know i suck at it so but i'm bummed uh but you keep trying uh that's that's the only thing that matters is keep trying she has one like on anal sex she has a bunch of different ones oh so yeah she has like a whole series of videos so oh that's great um yeah i knew she didn't say i ordered them on amazon the whole the whole collection i mean sexually is there anything as an expert who would I consider expert there's nothing that's why I came up with Nina Hart actually I'll call it sexual it's not I'd probably want to talk to like some of the better video editors in the porn world oh yeah exactly how'd you get that yeah that angle heard from our friend uh greg oh i don't know he might be working on real movies not just porn i texted him months like over a month ago hey man how's it going he hasn't gotten back to me i don't know he doesn't like us anymore i don't know i'll send him a naked picture then i get some response maybe i did that too that explains a lot right there he goes hey buddy then i know we're in trouble think he could tell it was photoshopped do you have like abs and his little horse like a big bulge down there i didn't i didn't oh yeah you weren't oh you were naked yeah think he could tell the difference between me and my black cock.

No. No? Okay. Just checking. It looked real. Just checking. I thought I did a good airbrush job. Yeah. I see your face is white as it comes down. God gave me this little Asian penis. I was like, oh my God, what's the difference? But anyway, all right, so tonight's topic is... Teasing. I need to get a drum roll on here. Oh, yeah. The art of teasing. The art of teasing, yeah. One of our favorite parts of sex, I think, at least mine. Right. I mean, I think teasing is, okay, let's put this down first. Okay. Would you consider foreplay part of teasing? Yes. Okay. We're good.

My trajectory, though, went even before that. It actually – Well, no, I just – Okay. We're going to go back to my – We're going to – the way I see it, and you came up with something. It's funny. We don't generally talk before the show. We only talk briefly before I hit the record button, was that I see teasing being in three modes, before the bedroom, in the bedroom, and after the bedroom. Uh-huh. And you were saying – Well, mine actually took a little bit more of a trajectory because I was like, okay, what do other people talk about teasing?

Well, they actually came up with flirting, teasing, and then hitting on someone. That's a different kind of – that's like cruelty teasing. Yeah, it's much more direct. I'm talking about like arousing teasing. Well, it doesn't always have to be like, you know, physical. No, no. Well, the teasing, sexting can be teasing. Oh, sure. It's all, yeah. Yeah. So that kind of flirting, you know, via, like even when I have a new playmate, we'll have like a little bit of a banter going back and forth, kind of like a sexting, teasing, that build up. You're getting the motor to warm up.

You know, you don't just – you shouldn't just go out there, turn your car on, and drive. You got to let it sit there and warm up a little bit. Warm up for a second. Yeah, a second or two. But they gave, like, a difference, like a whole spectrum of – A second or two, it should be a minute or two. Well, whatever for your car.

But they included flirting in there, and flirting is, like, more flirting is like more flirting is part of teasing i agree but it's more innocent it's not as like when you hit on somebody it's like direct hey babe want to fuck or you know hey i'll bang that i'll hit that it's like you gotta stop going to those bars yeah i mean it's like some of the rude comments we get on the swing lifestyle you're like hey i'll fuck your wife it's like well well thank you sir that's jesus christ you know i'm gonna go fuck your mom oh you're fucking my wife i'm gonna bang the snot out of your mom hey leave my mom i'm gonna fuck her so hard until cum comes out her ears how's that sound yeah then block them but like they had this uh this three-prong approach of flirting and teasing and then of course hitting up someone which is i'm gonna take that off the table just because i find it it's it's distasteful it's kind of i don't think i've ever hit on somebody i've never hit on anyone i've never had a, I've never had a pickup line.

No. You never? No. I mean, the way I guess I used to do it, if I picked up a girl or two in a bar or whatever, I would just sit there, like somehow they would be close to me. Again, some people think I have some kind of a sense of humor.

I i'd be joking around with somebody or whatever and then you know like the girl might be at the next table with some other girls whatever you know next you know conversations is happening and right it just happens it just the conversation just you know it's organic my yeah my quote-unquote personality kind of just i could thin out the herd by my personality see who liked it who didn't right and who kind of gravitated to have more conversation with me and then from there you know whatever happened yeah and I noticed you can talk to anybody yeah about people I shouldn't about anything which is one of my daughter's favorite comments dad stop talking to them you talk to you talk to everybody well i don't know it's kind of fun i i've seen you like joke and and kind of uh flirt with uh one checkout line at walmart type of a thing you know i love toothless women with tattoos they're my vibe man they're not all toothless on.

A couple of them are real old. Doesn't matter. You still kind of like flirt with them. There was one that was, oh. That one I want. Are you doing? Not for nothing, but I'd love to get that thing off your face. Take those towels off your body and see what's underneath there. Oh, my God. No. You make that black robe look so hot. Oh, I'd love to see your ankles. No, there was that real pretty blonde that used to work at the Walmart and used to flirt with her. She was older, but she was really cute. Remember her? Yeah. I haven't seen her in a long, long time. I don't think she works anymore.

I don't think so either, but it was fun. You guys would, you know. The restraining order made her a quick. Maybe. I don't know. No.

think she works i don't think so either but it was funny you guys would you know maybe i don't know no oh yeah no we used to flirt yep yep and it was it was like you know harmless fun you know it was like hey baby oh the the girl at staples you were always flirting with her she she's a that's a weird kind of flirting that's a i'll use a term that was sean flirting well you're like we go oh you're here yeah it's more of a banter than a flirt yeah it's just uh you know oh you're still here oh i you know if i knew you were going to be here i wouldn't come in and she she'll still come back out with you with something else she tries no it's it's all fun yeah it's it's fun banter she's one of your people yeah she's real short you guys all come out there we are the kids from the lollipop guild thank you she's like she's like 4'10 she's a little shorter than me yeah she's like 4'10 so you two could get three more friends and beat me up well we could.

Just got to find three more people that saw us. I'm sure they're around. I'll put an ad in the paper. I don't know. I lost the directions to Lopusha. Lopusha. I'll find it on my damn GPS. If I could just reach the knobs. Was it? This is totally off topic. Wasn't there a town somewhere? Somewhere in Jersey. Yeah, there's a. I suppose that there's a town of – If I could just reach the knobs. This is totally off topic. Wasn't there a town somewhere? Somewhere in Jersey. Yeah. Suppose that there's a town of very small houses and stuff that was. Oh, little people live.

Yeah, and they don't like people coming in there to see it. Yeah, I might be considered too tall. I don't know. I don't know. They might look at me like, oh, I'm a giant. What a bitch that would be. You know, you go to the amusement parks down the shore and you're not tall enough to ride rides. You go to that midget town and you're too tall. It's like, I can't win. I can't. I'm too tall in this situation. I'm too short in this situation. This sucks. Yeah, well. Moving forward. Okay, so back to teasing. I like teasing.

So you go about, talk about, I guess, so we'll go what goes the teasing like so when one of the guys who we might may not have met yet but like we're we have a meeting planned and you guys are texting back and forth what are some of the kind of teasing things you you say or do or you know what's in your wheelhouse well it starts out kind of innocent of course and then he he's like um you know he'll say something like you know i i wish i was there i i'd love to be you know between your legs or something like that and and so i feed off of that and you know then he sends like little emojis with the little you know the uh eggplant little sloshy thing you know that kind of thing vegetarian that's exactly what that means so sorry i need you to eat something that's not vegetarian sorry if you're going to go for eggplants i'm sorry i'm i'm kind of you know i'm kind of bringing a meat taco but you know He'll'll say something like, you know.

I've got a spitting clam. He likes to go down and how much he loves that he might, you know, talk about, you know, do you like. Or he might ask me questions like to, you know, get a few. The train leaves Boston at 8 o'clock. Not those kind of questions. Oh, okay. He doesn't know how to flirt at him.

If he doesn't ask me me this kind of questions he's just not flirting you know he'll he'll say something you know do you like they're gonna feel like what i'm into and he might ask me like do you like being spanked you like being you know what kind of things you're into and you know well you know feel around it it'll be like know, very, you're trying to scope out what the person is into. So it's not like really romantic. It's more like questions than is. Which BD clinic do you go to? Oh, maybe we'll meet up sometime. Do you know Dr. Johnson? Is he your favorite guy at the BD clinic?

I like his Johnson. Okay, it's a bad choice of name. Dick Johnson. Yeah, no, I mean, I could see that would be, if I was, it's been so long since I did any sexting. Well, oh, my God. But no, it would be like, you know, so, you know, you want to find out, what are you into? Well, I. And then you ask, you dive deeper into it.

So, you know, what kind of, you know, well what kind of that kind of thing do you like i mean do you like you know like you know body massages oh yeah i like body massages okay well what part do you like rubbed the most exactly for lotion or oil for hot cum spunk lube spunk lube which you can get it spunklube.com if you use discount code, it's a shopping cart of Hot White, all one word. You get a 10% discount. Shameless plug. That's fine. I don't mind. You know what? We actually are going to be able to give away. We'll get back to the topic. Uh-oh.

We're going to be able to give away some little pocket-sized sample bottles. Okay? I think, I don't know if they're one or two ounces i don't remember right now um if you send us your name and address to the first five people to hot wife podcast at gmail.com we will get you the sample bottles of the newest natural one which is the avocado and coconut oil oh they send us more than just the bigger one he's getting us oh he's getting the oh he can send it to him the name oh yeah so it's uh just wanted to say that oh i i was like so don't forget send us i was confused The first five. Sure.

Send us your name and address. And we will get Spunkwood to send you out little sample bottles. Nice. To try. And if you're one of the five, we'll let you know that, you know, you were one of the five and expect it within, you know, a few weeks. I mean, Jeff's pretty busy. Right. So he'll get you on a sample. Oh, cool. So back to teasing. Well, there was one guy I've been going back and forth with, and I think he just ghosted me. But that's not what I want to get to. We had an interlude that was really hot. He's like, hey, do you like big cum loads?

I'm like, oh, my God, I god i love big cum loads he goes i have some videos of myself where i come this like gigantic load and it was him because i could see his face in the video yeah the guy that goes with the giant cum load and i was like god damn it was so fucking hot and i was like ah so so he got me all worked up and then you know the day that we're supposed to get together he we kept coming up with excuses you know first it was the flood then he got a nail on his foot and then it was you know it's like if you don't want to do it don't do it it's probably better if he's that bad luck yeah you know exactly yeah exactly oh my backyard flooded oh i got shot by a nail gun in my leg.

Oh, my mom's calling me. Yeah, it's like. It's like, dude, if you got that bad luck, we don't want you. We don't want you. We got to have problems. We got a house with plenty of steps and shit. If you're accident prone like that, shit. Boom. Yeah, down the steps. So, yeah. But that was the videos I found very teasing, very hot, very erotic. I really got the motor going. Sure. It was because I knew it was him. I could see him in the videos, and it was pretty hot. So that kind of teasing I find very erotic. Okay, so that would be what part – that's part of the teasing that you enjoy?

Yeah, yeah, I doing is fine it kind of gets things started but i like the visual i like that next step more of the video than the stills yeah more of the video absolutely especially if it's a cum load not so much not so much a cock like the guy sitting there jerking off but you actually see him come oh yeah absolutely okay that was pretty freaking hot i see they're scribbling things frantically i have my etch sketch going oh man hold on i got a racist but yeah i mean i thought that was ipad that was um i found really really erotic and and since i'm always doing not always but i'm i'm having conversations with these guys before i meet them there's got to be that kind of teasing i figure out what they're going to what they're into you know if i come with the guy and he's like you know he goes i want to tie you up and beat the crap out of you i'm like that's not going to work for me i know you block me all the time or maybe um some some people have misled me i have found you know i think they're one guy claimed to be like he was a great tire came here with a six inch piece of rope i'm like what's the fucking because i got all these toys all these toys was one i was like where's all these toys i yeah yeah because you had built it up to me he's gonna tie me up and he's got all these toys really erotic video and he showed up and he had a six inch piece of rope and maybe one toy and one toy two toys and one didn't work whatever it was oh yeah that, yeah.

It was like, oh. I was like, well, here, let me get my dump. How much are you tying up with six inches of rope, dude? Yeah. You know what it was, too? The rope was like that plastic rope. It wasn't even like the soft rope. Yeah. It was like, ah. Well, you know, he tried. Not well, but he tried. No, not well. Yeah, that was kind of a disappointment.

So that tease kind of like that was kind of let down what do you think you tell the guys that teases them and gets them fired up huh no that wouldn't be it hey baby huh I'm gonna so huh you that's exactly what does it I'm gonna take your dick and I'm going to say, huh, you. That's exactly what does it. I'm going to take your dick and I'm going to, huh. He can make anything sound sexual. I was trying to figure out where I, the last time I had to text that to somebody, because it is all texting. Did you actually text huh? I did. I said, huh, hmm. Oh, my God. Let me think here.

That's probably one you sent to me. Well, I always say, you know, well, I say how much I want to suck their dick and, you know, lick their balls and stuff and, you know, take it in as deep as I can.

You know, I'm trying to, like, see how if they – hopefully they they like a blow job that's what i'm hoping for not that i'm in trouble like i mean we've met a few guys that they enjoy it but it's like oh that's not how i come that's not how you come i can't come that way i'm like how can you not come that way everybody's different yeah everybody's different you know i but i usually start with i can't imagine i mean unless you've had some bad experiences. And I've been with women who don't give blowjobs because they've had bad experiences. That's my bad experience. That's your bad experience?

Yes, having women that have had a bad experience and don't give blowjobs. That's my bad experience. Womp. No, that's the truth. But, yeah. This microphone, the sound coming back from me is bothering me. Anyway, I don't know. I think there's something to be said to me since you asked. Since I asked. I did ask. It was in my mind. I was mentally. Yeah, you're right yeah you're right you're mental you're mental we'll stop there we're good i was conveying it mentally you nailed that one yeah okay okay what did i ask if i could hear the inside your head it'd be like i'm cuckoo for sometimes.

I don't know if there's anything. Yeah, I can't think of anything that, like, a woman says to me that gets me all fired up. You're just not fired up-able? That's not good. I need more than just sexting. Well, i can't it's been so long since i've done that stuff i don't know you've been you sex certain people no not a long time oh jesus christ now oh i think who's the last one i sexted oh that tells you how long i can't remember remember yeah see. I can't remember. Yeah. See, I like pictures. I'll send them pictures. I'll send them little videos. I need more than just sexting. Sexting is fine.

Yeah. But it's too laborious. See, like, if I'm teasing them. Mm-hmm. And you remember, I used to write to you. Oh, yeah.

I'll give a long, drawn-out description of, like, how i'm going to go about teasing their pussy and stuff like that and yeah they were pretty good yeah i'm good at that's my engineering background where i can get very descriptive and uh be methodical and breaking it down into and painting a picture that's exactly yep that's exactly what it does too so i i find that very uh erotic to get the motor running before you actually meet the person and i i like that kind of little banter or uh i guess verbal foreplay before you meet them oh sure you know and then when you meet them it's like oh you were talking about erotic.

Or, you know, you're just describing a – well, the massages are something that if guys giving or receiving a massage or me getting a massage from them, either way, I find very, very erotic. Lots of lotion and things slipping around. And, you know, I find that – I like those messy massages. What can I tell you? I think they're, you know, because parts of your body just slip together. And it doesn't have to be sexual, but because it's like that skin to skin with that slippery stuff. Every time I have a woman give me a messy massage like that, she like rides my belly like a sliding board.

I only did that once. I feel like I'm short. I can't touch the ground with my knees. You can't let me forget to tell you a story later about this wacko woman I met today when I went to go pick up some stuff. Okay. Not sexual. It's just a wacko woman. I just thought of it. It's like, I wanted to tell you that story.

Oh, no no no yeah but um yeah no i enjoy like if i'm going to tease i like to try to uh paint a picture what i want to do with right to them right so yeah and you know what the teasing i like is just don't tell me hey i want to eat your pussy it's like no like give me like the build up spit the pubic hair out oh mince it oh i'm gonna pick the toilet paper out of that you're disgusting well i like it to be more subtle yeah i went to i want to talk about you know i like like maybe subtly kissing my nipples.

My nipples are not, I don't want them being, you know, tweaked and squeezed and stuff, but like soft kisses and soft. So the jumper cable clips. No, no, put them back. Put them back. I don't want them. I cleaned it up. They didn't have the battery acid on me. Come on. Oh, God. You're terrible. Yeah. I see those things coming at me. I'm out of here. I'm running. Foreplay. Come on, baby. Sometimes we even hooked up to the battery. That's just wrong. Let's jumpstart your love, honey. Oh, my God. Woo-hoo. I'm going to put these on like you're my sister. Well, you're just so not right.

I don't even know how to respond to that. Don't. Don't encourage me. Moving on. Don't encourage me. Moving on. I'm not going to benefit you anywhere. So those are things I like. Okay, so now we'll move from before the bedroom to in the bedroom. A lot of this translates a lot more. Yeah, but again, well, now it's a matter of delivering on what you promised. See, like, see, now, like, see, the things that don't translate as well in the teasing, like, let's say, texting or over the phone or whatever is, like, kissing. Uh-huh, that's right on here.

You know, of kissing doesn't translate and i you know like i mean i know a lot of women like and i like to do it because i i i truly am driven by a woman's arousal right so like to kiss the back of their neck or just lightly lightly like i say almost nibble yeah but like it's almost more like this like we drag my teeth across you know i'm not giving hickeys i'm fucking 57 you know no i don't want a hickey that's no i don't want to give you a hickey i'm just saying no i don't want that you know we you know some people who've gotten them um that are in their 40s that's just stupid um but uh anyway um yeah like that's that kind of shit doesn't translate no no it doesn't but I'll see you next time.

with that that's just stupid um but uh anyway um yeah like that's that kind of shit doesn't translate no no it doesn't but um i i love all that light touching i especially like when i was um bound at my my birthday party there was a lot of light raking of the nails and some of it wasn't so light but all that kind of very tactile sensations i found very very stimulating very exciting very um well with with your eyes being taken you know you're the next strongest sense i'm guessing would be the sense of feel and you're feeling these people you know because you're not able to touch them you're yeah i wasn't able to touch and you weren't able to see right you know so all you had was smell hearing and feel well hearing was a big one yeah even there wasn't a lot to hear because they weren't saying anything that's the beauty of it i mean all i found that very erotic because i could i could you when people move around the room even if they're not talking even if they're not doing it you can still hear you hear noises and anticipate things that's what it was but then you find out what you're anticipating doesn't happen or isn't what you think it is well you don't the anticipation wasn't something concrete like oh i hope they do this or i think they're going to do that it was like what's going to happen next you know what i can hear something oh they're moving this way what were they going to do now then you yeah that was frightening chainsaw exactly it's like i'm done for i'm dead that was me though well then i felt like somebody's fingernails raking and like the my thighs and like the back of back of my legs and then, like, really soft, like, butterfly kisses on my chest and, like you said, like, the nape of my neck and back there.

I was, like, I was getting, like, chills just. Well, that was a fun part of watching that, too. You could see me squirm. I knew what they were going to do to you, and you didn't know what was happening. Uh-uh, I know.

And then when something touched you or someone touched you, like, would jump yeah it was it was those i found that that kind of teasing took me to probably the brink i was like right there of not an orgasm but the intensity was there Yeah, the teasing slash foreplay in the bedroom is in my opinion that's all it is is really the most erotic part of sex not that intercourse isn't great right but it's like when you get your partner on that high where they're like i need you to fuck me now like you know when when her pussy is so wet or his dick i'm saying this is you at this point it's so hard because i don't know anything about that his penis is so hard and erect glands penis was so throbbing and you're not gay just had a flashback to Haunted House.

Here's a movie for you. We're going to do movie reviews. We're going to be sexual based. We're just going to do movie reviews. Fuck it. There's, I think it's called The Haunted House. A Haunted House. A Haunted House. It's one of the Wayne's brothers. Right. Is the main star. And I think he probably. He has a scary movie as the pothead. So it's about him and his girlfriend moving together in their house. And it becomes haunted. And the one actor who's been in a lot of different movies.

He played the gay brother in, I pronounce you, Chuckry right uh he's in there as a gay of course as a gay um uh psychic psychic yes and also there's a couple that are friends with them that is swingers yeah and they're trying to talk them into being swingers covertly yeah it's pretty funny you can see it on prime or anything else uh it's a very uh it's shot in a different way kind of almost well basically it's like they have video cameras all over the house they're videotaping their life right uh it's a pretty good movie get it if you get a chance check it out it's really funny the swinger part the swinger part So is the gay.

Oh, yeah. The gay psychic. Psychic. He keeps trying to. He does a great gay character. I don't know if he is in real life or not. But he does a great gay character. He's done gay characters in a few movies. Yeah, that was. The swinger aspect, I got a real chuckle out of. Oh, yeah. The way they're trying to see. You know, sometimes you don't want to drive your own car. You might want to drive your buddy's car. No, there's nothing wrong with my car. No, no, I'm just saying. Some people, I don't agree with that. Yeah, I don't agree with that. Oh, that would be sick.

Yeah, you know, but, you know, how about we do a sleepover tonight? You know, we could all sleep in the same bed. No, man, no, no, I'm just saying. Some people are into that. So, anyway, back to the topic.

Yeah, to the topic that was really cute that was really super cute gay voice threw me into that um and we digress again so again back to the topic was so with the um swing with the swinging with the uh teasing in the bedroom yeah when you get your whoever, whatever they may be, revved up to the point where her pussy's wet, maybe his dick might be dripping pre-cum, and you're at that point the opposite. You're right there, too. That's pretty hot. Yeah, that's, you know. All things are clicking, you know, all the motor's going. We'll see you next time.

too that's that's pretty hot yeah that's you know um all things are clicking but you know the motor's going everybody's up to speed the motor is warmed up so now when you go to do the intercourse part of it or the whatever plugging sorry had a burp i was like I thought you said flogging. Yeah, fucking. You know, it's – then the passion kind of can happen. Right, right. That makes sense. It makes sense. And women, sometimes we take a little bit longer. You know what I mean? It might take longer to get us revved up, to get us – get the motor going.

Guys, you just talk about, hey, you know to get us get the motor going guys you just talked about hey you know when a blowjob oh yep i'm there and the dick's hard and he's ready to go men are pretty pre-revved before they showed up at your house you know in general yeah you just tell a guy hey you want to get laid yep he's like knocking on the door and he's not using his hands hands are up here hands are in his pocket and he's knocking on the door you figure that one out. He's running the doorbell and his hands are behind him. And he's carrying a big tray of stuff. How do you? Oh, never mind.

Yeah, but the doorbell is all the way up here. Either he's really tall or something else. I don't know.

elephant's trunk yeah so the teasing part the you know is i think it's crucial oh some amount of teasing oh you know even if um even if like we're in the the kitchen you come up and you grab my ass that's a form of teasing too or you know i come up i was just drying my hands oh is that what you're doing yeah i just i washed them and there's no towel around oh yeah that makes sense in fact you said you got me wet and i'm like yeah just dry my hands oh okay never mind talking two different wets apparently apparently but even that's a type of teasing sure i guess sure it is i kind of you know little passionate stuff before but so yeah i mean i think it's it's imperative i mean you know and and sometimes i think the teasing part like like, you don't, I mean, obviously, maybe with men, you don't want to give them or until they come, you know, that way, I mean, you have to, you have to pre, you know, have to experiment and see if he's more than a one shot, you know.

Right, right, or how long. How many bullets did he bring in his gun? If he only brought one bullet, you don't want to—you might not want to waste it there. Yeah, maybe not. Because he might not be able to get the barrel up again to shoot. Yeah, that's a problem. Or, you know, you have to figure out, like, how long of a blowjob to give him to get him revved up without having the gun go off prematurely.

Yeah, where do you go to just teasing i mean where do you go from teasing to a blow job you know and uh well a blow job can be teasing if it's sure what's i'm saying if you don't finish it out exactly you get him going and like okay if he says i'm gonna come soon you're like in all fairness it's done you might as well just finish it yeah or you're gonna quick hop on it and get a cream pie and you're gonna be upset because he's like well you only fucked me for three pumps well you blew him for five ten minutes yeah you have to know like what yeah what your partners uh can handle what what their what their realm is like you know how much they can handle how much teasing they can handle before they before they explode yeah so you know so well and then the next phase is teasing after the bedroom well i've heard people use that a different term i don't think it's teasing they've used aftercare or afterglow i thought that's when i went to the clinic and got needles that's aftercare so you have to go back to the clinic yeah that's when i burn again doc oh that's well no that would be like you peed when you burn you got your medication then you have to go back for a follow-up that's the after care i'm scared i'm scared you know that much about it i've just been to doctors before not that kind of doctor but i've been to doctors before why are your fingers crossed when you said that okay just checking they're not crossed so so there i'm talking about like maintaining that i mean for you it's different because like you know they're just playmates they're not you're not in a relationship right there's people very very few times do you like hang out after and chat in bed when you're done very few couple one or two well most of them jump up it's like oh gotta go yeah well most of them jump up and it's like, oh, got to go.

Yeah, well, most of them do. See ya. Or we'll get dressed and we'll have dinner or something like that. That's fine, yeah. We have 50% of them hang out for a little bit. Yeah, they hang out afterwards, but we're not snuggling up in bed. Oh, no, there's not that, like, you know. There's no aftercare. Cuddle and spoon and shit.

No, of that i don't know i don't even get that i'm like honey was it good it's your fault it's your fault same sense you made during sex i hope i'm a little less and not as loud during sex i try to like cover you know make it more covert and then after you come that's romance baby that's 20 years that's romance who says i can't nail that shit? Yeah, I'd tear it up. You did. You tore that up. But no, I think, you know, again, I'm sure you, I don't ask you until now I'm asking, but you tell these guys, hey, man, it was great. You know, we had a lot, I had a lot of fun. Fun, yeah.

You do that as you're getting dressed and you're exchanging. Yeah, I give them the baby wipes. Have your own little brand of baby wipes. Here, here's your parting gift. Clean up. I mean, how often are you in contact with the guys? Not that, I mean. Until they get horny again. Until they get horny again. They'll reach out to me. Yeah, I got an email from a guy, oh, I really missed your blowjobs. That was me. Oh, okay.

And then there's always one young guy who's just like hey you around tonight yeah we have a couple of those hey i'm horny right now can i come over in 15 minutes it's like sure do i look like a revolving door i'm not there but yeah you can come over vince will punch you in the nuts. Yeah. It's like, oh, my goodness. You know, a little bit of planning. I appreciate a little more planning because people work and stuff. I don't schedule anything for you anymore. All I do is get yelled at. There you go. So I don't schedule. A couple of them, they were not good.

Guys, you know, text me or something. I say, you got to talk to her. I don't schedule her pussy. If couple of them, they were not good. Guys, you know, text me or something. I say, you got to talk to her. I don't schedule her pussy. If so, the schedule will be filled with me. Of course, I put my name on the whiteboard and somehow I get erased. I don't know. Who would hold the camera then, hon? One word. Tripod. Oh, boring. I like it better when you come around, you zoom in, and walk in there with the gimbal. Yeah, I'm not in front of the camera guy.

No, you're definitely a behind-the-scenes kind of a guy. I get it. I understand that. I appreciate that. That's no problem. But, yeah teasing um i think it's it's i don't i don't know we talked about kissing the wall started kissing and what was the other one we talked about the art of you might have done teasing before we might have done teasing before i don't know i don't know. Whatever. If we did this before, well, this is part two. I know we did a lost art of kissing for sure. That was actually a pretty popular one. Yeah.

Well, kissing is all, like you said, it is definitely a part of teasing. And I think the tease is the buildup. However, you want to define teasing, whether it's or you know sending your potential partner like little videos and little sexy pictures and again yeah one of the early shows we did was called you know send me a pic oh oh wow we talked about that and that's a form of teasing that is a form and i think that was a long time ago you know um women who are asked to do that because I don't think women generally ask their husband, you know, guys at work or something. Right.

I mean, the wife might be at work too, but it's easier. Women have stalls. Right, right. You know, men have urinals. We just stand there. All of a sudden, you're standing there. You're junk out holding the camera. A guy walks in. Wouldn't you go into a stall? There's got to be a couple of stalls. You don't go shit in front of people, do you? Come on. Oh, you'd be surprised. I've been in places. Ew, that's disgusting. Well, men are disgusting creatures. That's why I'm not gay that you know of. That I know of. Okay, there we go.

But, yeah, that's, I mean, if your husband or boyfriend or both ask you to send them a pic, I mean, that's them telling you they want you to tease them. Right, right. I mean, like, you know, again, we had this discussion. Sure. Like I've said to you countless times, hey, baby, you know, send me a pic. You're like, oh, you've got thousands and thousands of pictures of me. It's like that's not the point. The point is that you take a pic. Right. It's from you. Right.

You know even it's even more erotic if i don't have to ask for if you just send it because then i know you're thinking of me you know instead of sending me a picture of like the back of the house like see back here there's a walkway that needs to be finished it's not the pick i was asking for look see there's a. There's no trash out there. There should be trash out there. A trash can, not trash. We're a trash can. Trash can. It's out there. Oh, look. Here's a picture of the deck. See, it has leaves all over it. They need to be blown off. I sent you a picture of my dick.

This needs to be too as soon as the deck gets blown when one deck gets blown one dick gets blown one dick gets blown then the deck gets blown we're going to be at this all night it sounds like I've got a point to make here somewhere. But anyway, so, so, but no, again, teasing is just, I think is a vital part. Hang on. More bourbon time. More bourbon time. Okay. Well, I, I have sent you pictures. A lot of times I'm dressed like all crummy and disgusting. So it kind of sucks. I don't want to show you like, you know, nasty, you know, I want to be like more sexiest.

But here I am in my leggings again. And for me, you don't, I don't get anything. But someone says, hey, let's do a webcam. Makeup. Okay. Make this sexual. Okay. One of these cards. What's on your bucket list oh well i definitely a three so is in my bucket list okay two guys two girls doesn't matter five girls um just whatever whatever the combination is i don't care i'd like to have um i think ideally I'd like to have at least another woman and another man. Or maybe two, another woman and two other men. Make it a foursome. That might be kind of convoluted, but, you know, I think.

Are you switchies? It'd be kind of fun, I think. Okay. There's no wrong answer. No, no. What about bucket list sexual bucket list yeah sexual bucket list no it's one of my problems i've kind of done everything no you haven't you've never done anal you've never i've never received anal and i don't want to that's not on my bucket list that's on my bucket list oh there's a difference a bucket list and a bucket list i like that something i want to do is on my bucket list something i don't want to do is my bucket list Thank you. Oh, I misconstrued. That's the fuck it list.

I've given anal plenty of times. Yes, you have. I've been the receiver of that. I've even talked about the story about the first time I gave anal. Oh, yeah. That was 20 years ago. I've been the receiver of that. I've even talked about the story about the first time I gave anal. Oh, yeah. That was 20 years ago. I've been in threesomes. Yes, you have. I've been with, you know, a woman and another guy. Right. I've been where it's me and two women. Right. You know, it's like, okay, I've met all the combinations. Now there is one more, but we're not going there. I'm sure. Stop.

But, yeah, no, I mean, it's, you know, when I was younger, I always wanted to fuck in the rain. I did that. I fucked on the beach. I've never fucked in the rain. Fucked in the pool. I've been in public. The beach sucked never I've never fucked in the rain Fucked in the pool I've been in public The beach sucked I've done it in offices Didn't even a hay mal Hay what? Hay mal Hay mal Where they store hay Isn't that part of a song? Hay mal No, different song But yeah, it's not good You don't want to. No. Hay is not good. Okay, so a pile of hay is called a mal? A mal.

Or it's the building that the hay bales are stored in is a hay mal. Hay mal. I believe you. So, yeah, it's not good. That's completely useless information. Well, in hay, you can only really, unless you put like a blanket down or something. Yeah, it's kind of itchy and scratchy. It's really itchy and scratchy. Hey, or straws are both terrible. Well, it's like sand isn't great. Oh, my God, yeah. You get that abrasion. Oh. Yes, that's not good. It goes everywhere. It is like fucking with this sandpaper. Yeah. You know? God. You start out with a nice, you know, 10-inch dick right time you're done.

Someone will probably write into it, no, man, I love that. It's like, hey, cool. Yeah, that abrasion is just nasty. And that sand is... Do you know what's great for stopping the abrasion? Ah, spunk lube. That's spunklube.com. Don't forget to use discount code HOTWIFE, all one word. So if you're fucking on the beach and that sand, that little bit of grit gets in there, use some spunk lube so it just smooths it out. You better go back to your hotel room, take a shower, put spunk lube on and then fuck the shit out of her. But sometimes you want to be spontaneous on the beach or something.

Yeah, I know. I found that out. Yeah, it wasn't. Amazing what alcohol will do. You know, almost every one of my great stories involves alcohol. I think you have an actual problem. No. I don I know. I found that out. Yeah, was it? Amazing when alcohol will do. You know, almost every one of my great stories involves alcohol. I think you have an actual problem. No. Of course you'd say that. No, I mean, I don't drink all the time. Just every day. I mean, I have coffee in the morning. There you go. It's not all the time. Yep, it's not all the time. I drink more coffee than I drink alcohol.

Yeah, so do I, absolutely.

Because I have all those bottles up there there and they aren't disappearing quickly so now they're still there yep empty and everything um just so you don't know but um keep refilling them with water iced tea colored iced tea colored water yeah that's for iced tea it's brown i know but iced tea is gonna you'll know after a while because i will get moldy and stuff that'd be gross because it's out there and it's warm yeah keep a note of that colored water probably would work better just saying you're gonna fool me with bottles of alcohol okay i'm not gonna get into your art background and ask you like well what colored food what color food dye should I use to make brown?

I'm not going there to shut up. All right, so with that, reach out to us at hotwifepodcasts at gmail.com. Oh, and there is some potential exciting news we're hoping to find out in the next day or so. Okay.

We were actually reached out to by the people who host our podcast about a collaboration with another sexual podcast um and if that happens we're not sure what's going to happen yet that will let you know um and what that means is just uh you know they're going to be more aware of ours and we'll be more aware of theirs there might be some intermingling of some sort i don't know basically the podcast is I'll give you the name I'm not afraid of it it's come come for me or come to me come with me it's a it's a woman apparently who tells these erotic stories um so we listen to a couple segments yeah and it's erotic stories for women it's's definitely women-based.

But it's good for men, too. Oh, there you go. So it's, it'll be interesting to see if that happens. Zach, we already have it now, right? Yeah. You know, to help, you know, because being in the adult genre is a little tougher to get some traction and sponsors and stuff so it'll help all of us so again I want to thank you and hope you have a good week and our next podcast will be Friday sounds good alright everybody have a good night We'll see you next time.