“Read the Bio, Romeo: The Profile Strikes Back”

Transcript

Speaker1: This program contains strong sexual content. No one under the age of 18 is permitted to listen to or download this podcast in any manner. The host, guest, and performers are all over the age of 18. Rebroadcasting the podcast in any manner is strictly prohibited without the written consent of the owners of the Hot Wife podcast. The commentary of this program is the sole opinion of its host or guest and does not reflect that of the opinion of Hot Wife podcast owners, agents, or representatives. This podcast is not meant to be taken as professional advice. Spill the team Hello everybody, this is Donna Lynn and welcome to my Hot Wife Podcast. Yeah, what a hard time getting started there. Hi! Yeah, I'm still a little, I have a little frog in my throat. I still have that little cold or whatever's going on, so. Sorry, I'm a little gruff. You want a little cock in your throat? A little cock in my throat? Something like that, yeah. I can provide that. I'm not even gonna go there. That's my problem. Nope. Yeah, it's been a day, huh? It's been a day. Yeah. Get, you know, one day off in the middle of the week, one day at the weekend, and someone's got to shit on my whole day. Actually, a couple people. Yep, yep. So, it does happen. Sorry about that. You weren't one of them. Oh, I thought I was. Oh, this time. Okie dokie. Day's not over yet. Yeah, there's still some daylight. I could be fucking up your day. Even more. Well, we had to shoot that stupid video. You were not pleased about that. You know, these custom videos, these people with their fantasies, I just sit there and like, really? Oh, you're going to do this for two and a half minutes, and you have to wear this, and you have to say this, and then for five minutes, you're going to do this, I've never had a fantasy that was that fucking exact. That choreographed? Well, the first video, we talked about this last week, the first video is really erotic to me. You're flogging me. Oh, that was so good. Oh. Well, you liked it. Yeah, you're like, yeah, I don't get it. But I'm like, oh, you're doing it just right. Yeah. You heard that, everybody. once. Ah, there you go. Yes, you did. I can't take that back. I can't say I can't do anything right. Nope. I can't say that ever again. Made you come, whatever it was I was doing. Ah, yes, you did. That was awesome. That was, oh, that was amazing. Again, is there a bad orgasm? No, no, there's not. That one was exceptionally good. Well, the thing is, I, I didn't, I wasn't sure if it was going to be that arousing to me. Was it, was the question whether, with me doing it or someone else doing it? Oh, it was definitely arousing and you were doing it, but I also knew that you weren't really into it, so that kind of took some of it away, but I just basically said, well, he's doing a good job, so whatever you're doing, keep doing it. That's what I'm saying. Man, words you never say about anything else I do. Oh, shut up. Except my cooking. Oh, your cooking is wonderful. You do a lot of wonderful things, so I didn't even go there. Anyway, so kind of sort of similar related, The topic for today's topic. Yes. Is read the profile. Here we go again. If you're on a Swinger website, read the profile all the way to the end. Even if you're on a dating profile. A dating profile, yep. I mean, do you just go buy a car because it looks pretty? I wouldn't, no. Yeah, you could read the whole thing. I have this beautiful looking Corvette sitting there. And it's like, well. And then the description breaks down all the time. Needs a new motor. The tires keep falling off. The seats are ripped. There's a smell of fart. I can't get out of the seats. But the picture of the car is beautiful. You just don't see the interior. Oh, I want to buy your car. Oh, did you read the whole thing? Yeah, did you read the profile? I saw the pictures. It's gorgeous. an AI thing. Put a profile on. I'm pretty convinced of this. And, you know, she could have the most stunning AI body. Be realistic looking. And you could put in a profile, oh, loves to fuck, has raging herpes, crabs out the ass. You know, her penis just got removed. You know, the teeth are false. She's going to, you know, suck you with her gums and her one real tooth. They'll never read it until they get there. Then they're like, oh my God, you're hot, honey. And even put in there, not a real woman. This is an AI thing. So if you answer to this, you're showing me you're stupid. Right. Right. Yeah. Oh man, I want to, you know, baby, I want to get with you. Did you read the profile? Nope. And again, we've had the same thing happen to us. Well, I guess that maybe the reality is setting in. That happens a lot. That does happen a lot. Yeah, but we even met, the couple we're talking about, we actually met them, very nice couple. Very nice. Not trashing the couple? No, no. I thought they were both really hot. I thought they were delightful. I thought she was attractive. He didn't do much for me. Yeah, but she was all like, I'm wildly bi. I'm like, oh, goody, this is going to be so much fun. And yeah. And then we talked about how she's on another website, and she, posts all these pictures and videos of herself up there for free. For free. And we're like, well, why aren't you putting them up for content, you know, and selling them? That's an interesting idea. It's like, okay. I guess there's some people that I'm just, I guess they're so well-to-do or so well-off that they don't need extra money from my take on it because they're traveling here and traveling there. Oh, we just do it for fun. It's like, well, I'm doing it for fun too, but if I can If I can multitask, why not? Why not do it? I can have fun for fun and profit. Why not? It doesn't make any sense. Why would you do one without the other? It doesn't make any sense to me. When I had my photography business, I don't know if you remember, there's people that like, well, you already have the camera and you have the skills. Just take my picture. Just take my picture for free. My time is worth something. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There was that one bodybuilder couple and you told them how much it was going to be. and they're like, oh, that's too expensive for us. It's like, we have to drive to you. Yeah, they were. In New Jersey? The next day it over. Yeah. Had to drive to them. Right. And I used to get $125 an hour. I was going to bill them $75 an hour. That was, you're losing money at that stage of the game. Yeah, I had a camera that just the body of the camera was three grand. Right, and that was back then. Then you have a $1,500 lens on it. Yeah. You know, and then, you know, gas, wear and tear on the car. My time. Yeah. My skill. $125 for an hour? You can get a lot of pictures. Well, I would charge them $75, but they thought that was too expensive. Yeah, so $125, but that's very reasonable because, you know, you have all the equipment and the knowledge and everything else. Well, that's why I went out of business. Oh, the iPhone, yeah. The iPhone came out and everybody thinks they're a photographer. It's even worse now with AI. Oh, my goodness, yeah. You know, we need a model. You don't even, you just need a prompt. Yeah, it's funny how everything changes. profile, as an example, on the Swinger site we're on. And the very first two sentences are, we are content creators. Do not contact us unless you are interested in being videotaped and have to sign a release. Well, it did diminish a lot of the emails we were getting. Yeah, thank goodness. But we still get some people, and this is kind of what the show is about, these people that reach out to us like, oh man, I just had a gentleman today. Oh my God. I am so hot for your wife. It's like, well, good. Are you hot enough to sign a release and be videoed? Crickets. It's like, really? Huh. I guess she didn't read. I mean, I even put it there like it says in our profile. Like it says in our profile. Maybe he actually took his thumb out of his fucking ass and looked at the fucking red, the fucking profile. Like, duh, maybe I should have read something. I was just looking at pictures because I am not too good with those syllable things. I'm like, yeah, pretty much. Yeah. I've got a pee-pee and I want to get it wet. I didn't know reading was an option. It's a requirement, it's not an option. I went to the leering center. Leering center, yeah. That's where he leered him to read. Yeah. But yeah, I bet that's so true with so many things, so many, you know. Across the board, people don't read. People don't read. You put a sign on doors and push, and they're going to pull. They're going to pull. It says exit. They try to go in. Oh, yeah. It's ridiculous. People are not getting brighter. I don't know if they're getting more stupid. Is that a word? Stupider. Stupider? Yeah, more stupid. That's after you pass Jupiter. It's stupider. It's stupider. Or if they're just lazy. D all the above. Or just don't care. D all the above. So, I mean, no matter what site you're on, if you're looking to connect with somebody, I mean, if you saw an ad for someone that does remodeling to your house, you saw a picture. It's like, oh, my God, look at that. It's gorgeous. I want them to do my own. But if you read the ad, it's like, well, we barely know which side of the hammer to use. We're going to overcharge you, and we're going to have plenty of extras. You're not going to quote it right, and chances are you're going to have to hire someone else to redo it. And fix it, yep. Oh, my God, that picture looks great. I got to hire them. It's like, did you read the ad, motherfucker? Did you read the ad? Did you read the reviews? That's an important one, too. Yeah, we know that. Yeah, everybody, everybody's, well, a lot of people are, you know, leaving reviews, so read reviews, see if this, the site is good for you or whatever you're, you know, looking into. Well, and again, the ones when the site were on, you know, they have a, they call it, They have certs. Certifications. See if they have certifications. And you'll see. I mean, if they have none, and they've been on there for many years, there must be something wrong. Right. Because people will give you certs, but you have to okay them. Right. You don't get a negative cert. That's like a review. If someone sends a cert and says, you know, Vince has got a small dick, it's unsatisfied, I said, I'm not approving that comment by Donna. I sent that one up several times. I know, and I have to keep rejecting it. You have to log back in and then approve it if you want it to be there. Oh, yeah, that's what I'm going to have to do. Yeah. But no, I mean, it's like, I mean, really, you look at a menu, it's like, oh, wow, here's this, you know, dishes, you know, Franchisco chicken. It's like, oh, it sounds good. Okay. Did you read what's in it? No. No, but the picture looks good. The picture looks good. It's stuffed with cow manure. Oh. I'll try it anyway. Okay, whatever. You know. No, usually they're like, I don't want that. It's cooked in bull spit. Yeah. Yeah, so we got zoinked again. And make sure. Let's go from the other aspect. Okay. Make sure your profile spells out what you're into, what you're not into, what you're willing to accept, what you're not willing to accept. What are you looking for? What don't you want? Your profile should spell it all out. You might need to use bolder text or some of the less bright people. Underline bold text. And see, this is where the single male especially falls into the trap because they don't read. They look at the pictures. Yeah. It's a Playboy thing. You know, they look at the pictures. the pictures. They're not reading the writing. They're not reading the forums. They're not reading the articles. You know, they just say, oh my God, they got to my dick hard. I got to contact them. They got to be with me because I have a hard dick now. Yeah, that's exactly why I respond to them. That's the only thing I respond to. When a woman reaches out to me and says, I've got a hard dick, I'd say, oh. Yeah. Yeah. They them is hot for me. I'm in a fucking mood. You are in a fucking mood. I am in a fucking mood. Yeah, it kind of like, it's like somebody shitting on our cornflakes a little bit. That didn't help today. My daughter didn't help. Yeah, it's just been one of those days, unfortunately. And it does happen. It does happen. Yeah, all the time to me, but it's a different story. It's okay. I'm still above ground. Yeah, there you go. Well, you know, well, you know, now I have my Sunday open again, and I'm going to reach out to a playmate, and I'm going to have him over. Oh, it's not like a question you can't find someone. No, it's just a scheduling thing sometimes. But when these people, you know, reach out, and they're like, oh, my God, yeah. Yeah, we meet them, and we explained everything when we met them, everything on the table. I have to bring one of those big tablets like you use in a meeting where you can, like they use for Pictionary. Right, right, yeah. to bring that in an easel to a restaurant or a bar where you meet people. I'm like, okay, here's you. And then here's Donna with her legs up. Okay, look, here's your pee-pee. It's hard. Okay, over here's me. Video camera. Look at this. See the cameras aimed at the two of you? And in your hand, look at this. That's a release that you signed. Yep, you have to sign a model release. Do you understand? Do you get the words coming out of my mouth? I'll go fucking to the Navy and learn the semaphore. I don't know what the fuck I need to do. Fucking Helen Keller and this shit. You lose that with a podcast. The whole hand movement thing. The hand movement thing. Sign language, you mean. That's what I meant. Yeah, the thing is we were so up front the whole time we were talking. It's not just them. There's been other couples. reached out to us and we met them and they were all like, oh yeah, that sounds like fun. And we explained everything that we do, where we post, what we hope to gain from this relationship. And she was like, oh my God, this is exciting. This is exciting. This is fun. There was a couple we met up the street here at that restaurant that she was a real estate agent. Oh yes, yes. And they were like, oh yeah, that'd be kind of fun. That'd be kind of exciting. Crickets, crickets. You know, the gentleman we met that was a jockey. Oh yeah, crickets. Oh, that sounds like fun. Oh, my God. Or then you have people like, at first they reach out to you and they're like, oh, my God, this is so erotic. I've always wanted to be videotaped. Okay, can you come up? No, I've changed our mind. No, it gives it more gradual. It's like, well, you don't have to shoot my face, do you? And I'm like, no. No, we shoot your face, not your penis. Because in porn, no one wants to see a penis. They want to see your face. Yeah, that's all. That's it. Just your face. They just want to see your O face. Oh. What an office-based reference? Yeah, so that's all they want to see. So it's like, no, we could have done like a mask or we have all kinds of, you know, hoods and masks and this and that. We could have all done a BDF something. We could have worn that. He could have worn that leather mask. We're gearing this conversation towards shooting content. But it goes for the same thing if you don't, if it's just a couple. Right, right. If you sit there and say, hey, listen, We only look for, we don't want single males. We just want other couples. Okay. Well, then single males go and apply. It's like, asshole. Read the fucking profile. Read the profile. Or, you know, if you express an interest, hey, I'm a chubby chaser. You know, I'm looking for fuller size women, men, whatever. And then all of a sudden, you know, someone that looks like, you know, And there's nothing wrong with olive oil. If someone is not looking for that. Yeah, they're not going to respond. The same as I know there are people that have out there on their profile that they don't, they're not looking for BBC. Right, right. It's just, it's not being a derogatory thing. It's meant to say, well, that's not, you know, not my preference. Like, I like chunky peanut butter, you like smooth, okay? Yep. You know, it's just a preference. There's nothing meant wrong about that, hopefully. Hopefully, yeah. I can't speak for these people. I'm hoping. I don't know. I don't know either. But, you know, if you don't have a preference, you know, if you have something you prefer not to... Engage in. Yeah. You know, a woman doesn't want anal, don't show up and be like, oh, I'm going to bury my dick in your ass. Like, you said in my profile, no anal. I don't do anal. Yeah. Or if a profile says, I only do anal, and you're like, hey, can you suck my dick? No. He says, I only do anal. I think a guy would be pretty much okay with that. Yeah, well, whatever. You don't know. You don't know. That's true. I take that back. You know, it says, hey, I am a trans. There are people, I'm trans. Right. Puts it out there. Well, what happens if some guy goes and meets this individual and it's like, you are a man. Hey, fucking asshole. Read my profile. Yeah. My profile says. Take the two minutes, scan the profile. So you don't get surprised Better yet Why make a situation difficult? Again, this is across the board With everything Yeah Not just swinger websites Yeah, I mean You're wasting everybody's time Dating sites And going to cause a hard You know, a hard feeling So why do that? Yeah, why do that? It doesn't make any sense No But yeah, I agree So read the profile Read the fine print Well, it's not that fine. It's big enough to read. In our case, it is big enough to read. Pull your pants back up. Put your pee-pee away. Read the profile. Read the profile. I mean, it has, like you said, has curbed a lot of the riffraff. Oh. We used to get probably 10, 15 emails a day. Yeah. We're down to two a week. Yeah. And those two, guess what? Didn't read the profile. So it doesn't matter, does it? No. Oh, well. I don't know. I don't know. It keeps life interesting. It does keep life interesting. It keeps my blood pressure high. Yeah, it's just been a day of whirlwind nonsense. It didn't need to happen if they just would have read the profile. If anyone wants a question why I drink, okay, just listen to the show. I'm for many more reasons, but this is certainly one. Oh, it's right up there. My daughter's another one. My wife's another one. Oh, shut up. What? I love you, dear. That's what I was just saying. Oh, of course. I said, there's another one. I love my wife. Oh, that's exactly what I heard. Yeah. What? Some feedback coming through. Oh, I'm sure there's feedback. Somebody's walkie-talkie or something. Oh, I'm sure. Here's my crazy wife. Okay. So you have a crazy wife. No. What does that mean? No, it's whoever's on that walkie-talkie. Oh, yeah. Don't make him play the song again. Wayne liked the song by the way. Did he? He thought it was sweet that I wrote a song for you. Yeah, my husband is all romance. Yeah, well, I married a psycho bitch. Play it then, Mr. Smarty Pants. No, I did. I don't need to hear it again. It'll go viral. Yeah, it'll go viral. What do I do with all that money? Yeah, okay. Keep dreaming. Keep dreaming. I should make change that to, I divorced a psycho bitch named Lynn. Well, did we kill this horse or what? Oh, I want to kill a few. But yeah, we did it. That's enough. So if there's a theme from the show, I would have to sum it up in a couple words. Well, probably won't read that profile. Okay, a few words. Read the fucking profile. Okay, four. Four words. You want three? I can just make it. Yeah, read the profile. In my opinion, read the fucking profile. And that's for everybody. He's testy, huh? You're going to want people to read your profile. Oh, yeah, exactly. If you have a profile, yeah. Well, I mean, there's more than just these swinger websites, like you said before. I mean, what if you're a single guy and you're getting contacted with guys like, profile says I'm straight. Yep. Oh, come on, stop. No, you're not. That's going to piss you off. You can't look so fucking hot and be straight. Straight. I thought that meant your dick was straight and goes straight in my ass. Oh, god. No, it meant I'm straight. No, you're just thinking you're straight. I can convince you to be something different. Be all you can be up my ass. You're so wrong. Put all you can put up my ass. Okay. Okay, we wrap this up. Yeah, let's wrap this up. It's going into the toilet pretty quickly. I'm drinking bourbon. As always, as always. I have coffee in the morning. Oh, good to know. With bourbon. He's kidding. It's not true. 50 Shades of Pleasure. Check it out. It's free. 50shadesofpleasure.com, the magazine. And? Hotwifedonlin.com, where I'm posting. Hopefully there'll be more new stuff coming up. Hopefully. I hope. As soon as somebody comes over here and fuck the shit out of me. Wow. That makes you feel good. You can come over here and fuck the shit out of me. But you have to. Read the profile I have to sign a release You're not going to shoot my face are you That's all we're going to shoot Didn't we have this conversation I don't want my dick in it Someone might recognize my dick I don't want my face My stomach Or my dick in it Can you do that Or your feet Oh my feet would be a dead giveaway Who the fuck that was Yeah Wow Eight toes Hey that's Vince The eight-toed wonder. Yeah. Wonder when we're going to fall off. All right, everyone. Hey, stay horny. Have a great night, everybody.