Different types of Orgasms

Transcript

this program contains strong sexual content no one under the age of 18 is permitted to listen to or download the podcast in any manner the host guest and performers are all over the age of 18 rebroadcasting this podcast in any manner is strictly prohibited without the written consent of the owners of the hot wife podcast the commentary of this program is the sole opinion of its host or guest, and does not reflect that of the owners of the Hot Wife Podcast.

The commentary of this program is the sole opinion of its host or guest and does not reflect that of the opinion of the Hot Wife Podcast's owners, agents, or representatives. This podcast is not meant to be taken as professional advice. Hi, this is Donna Lynn, and welcome to my Hot Wife Podcast, where we discuss all the good, the bad, and the really erotic of the swinger lifestyle. Hello, everybody. This is Donna Lynn, and welcome again to my Hot Wife podcast. And with me tonight is my wonderful husband, Vince, again. Hello. I'm trying to introduce you in a nice way. And I said hello.

Yes, you did. I didn't come back with a wise one. No, not tonight. I'm still waiting. It's still early. It's definitely still early. Oh, my God. So it's... Hmm. It's done... What? We're recording this one early, but so we just had a busy weekend. Very busy weekend. I'm still loving that. Yeah. Well, it wasn't as busy as it could be. And we talked about that the last podcast. Yes, we did. So we listened to that one. We don't need to re-kick it. But again, if you really want to hear how busy her weekend was, you have to join our Patreon.

So you can either go to our website at hotwifepodcast.com and hit the button there, or go to patreon.com slash hotwifepodcast. All one word, no spaces or anything. And then for $5 a month, you get to hear, right now, at least four shows a month we're going to be putting up that are exclusive content. Sounds good. And if you don't want to hear them, then you can keep listening for free. And that's fine, too. But you won't hear those juicy ones. Super juicy. Yeah. In a few ways. That was fun. Okay. Okay.

So we kicked around a couple topics for tonight's show and the topic you decided to go on was levels of orgasm or types of orgasms orgasms because they're so much fun that's what it's all about would you have sex if you didn't have an orgasm huh Thank you. Because they're so much fun. That's what it's all about. That's, well. Would you have sex if you didn't have an orgasm? Huh. You know, that's a good question. Probably not. Well, I mean. Probably not. Sex is still enjoyable. Yeah, but the big O is what I'm going for. It's sort of like a Seinfeld thing.

Do you really want to eat the bottom of the cupcake and just eat the bottom? You don't want to eat the caps? See, I like the caps. With all the icing and everything? Well, a muffin. Oh, like a muffin. I'm sorry, a muffin. Like they did the whole muffin top thing. Oh, the muffin top thing. Yeah, because everybody was eating them. They weren't eating the bottoms or some such thing. Yeah, it's like, would you just want to eat the bottoms or good? The bottoms are good, but the top is just bad. For some reason, it's more moist and whatever. I don't know.

I think it's just more fun to eat of a muffin. I like that little crispy edge of the muffin, like where it goes over the paper, you know, kind of like, you know... Like the mushroom kind of... Yeah, the mushroom type of thing. Penis head style thing. Maybe that's why I like it so much. I think so. It's like, ooh, if I could... That'd be a pretty thick penis. Like're fucking a short dick fucking elephant. That's okay. That's okay? You'd fuck an elephant? No, I said, that's okay, it's that thick. I said, like. He said, like, it wasn't. It's like, well, yeah. You scared me.

I'm not going to go to the zoo anymore. You know, especially when I start winking to the elephant it's like i'll be back next week you know you see an elephant get a heart on it i'm gonna call the spca give him your name i'm only kidding i'm only kidding anyway so yeah i mean but and but there people, especially women that have never had orgasms. That is a crying shame. Yeah. Just saying. I've gotten to experience a few of them and changed that. Well, that's good because you cannot go through life without having an orgasm. Yeah.

My, well, I told, I think I may maybe mentioned it on air one time, but my ex-wife, um, invited one of her friends over who was recently divorced and, you know, wasn't a happy camper. Beautiful woman, sad to say. She is no longer with us. You know, she developed cancer and passed, but she was a dynamite woman. But, yeah, I got to play with her and made her come numerous times. And that was she said she'd only had one other orgasm in her life, and that was from masturbating with a vibrator. Yes, I thought I remembered that. Her husband, her ex-husband, never gave her an orgasm. Yikes.

He'd get his, and then he was done. Well, that's probably why they were divorced. Mm-hmm. Maybe, and some probably, some other reasons. Yeah, definitely more than that. Well, even the one woman we shot with that would like to be fisted and stuff like that, she says she has a real hard time having orgasms. She generally doesn't have them. I accomplished that. Yeah, you did accomplish that. Yeah, that's a crying shame if you've never had an orgasm. Yeah. You know, it's like, that's the whole. It's like getting the drawn butter, but not the lobster. Yeah.

It's like, oh, the it's like getting the drawn butter but not the lobster yeah yeah it's like oh the butter's good don't get me wrong yeah unless you got something to dip it in there pour on some fucking toast or something yeah it's like it's just butter it's just butter it's okay but you know my dick to go get an orgasm that'd be fun to suck on well the old buttery and yummy a buttery cock i guess i don't know i'll go with the buttery pussy i don't yeah that's just me i'm funny that yeah you are funny that way i don't know you're just a weird guy i don't know i don't know because i'm a guy maybe that's why i identify as a guy a straight heterosexual gentleman oh there you go anyway Gentlemen.

Well, okay. Hey, when you're identifying a shit, you can make up what the fuck you want. I identify as a gentleman, okay? Oh, well, we know that's not true, but that's okay. Hey, that's how I identify. Okay. As long as you're happy with that. Well, I'm so happy with it. That's how I identify. Yeah.

So, when was your first orgasm i think it was like actually later in life because i was younger i i was um you know in my late teens it was i didn't know what an orgasm was i was just fucking the fuck and we've already talked about that and it was fun don't get me wrong it was you know because you're horny blah i never had the orgasm part of it not till i was probably like a freshman in college or something like that so it was a little later yeah i finally figured that part out i i forget like how i did i probably was did it like through masturbation or something maybe i had a partner who was really good i don't remember moving of an experience so it probably was yeah yeah i again i think we did touch on this before so yeah i was 14 or 15 i guess i masturbated for the first time and i had no concept of the orgasm and it went off and i didn't know what to make of that feeling right it was like scary yeah it's like i didn't remember i don't you know it's like was that good or bad i can't tell am i sick there's stuff coming out oh my god am i gonna die wasn't supposed to do that yeah you know yeah it's like they don't teach you all that stuff you know in in health class really they do but they don't they don't yeah they don't go over to i guess you just kind of skim over it or since you're in school you're not really paying attention there's no um well now kids have the fucking internet yeah you can find out anything you want yeah but uh yeah you know they say well the man's nailing male penis penis will achieve orgasm and semen will come out.

It's like, okay, that doesn't tell me anything. No, it doesn't. You know, I mean, I'm glad they didn't show a video or a film strip or something. Me too. We'd be scarred for life. It's like, oh, no. I would probably take down the underage birth thing right there. Well, there you go.

Yeah, that's yeah that's borderline porn you know showing that well i know i know it was nothing anyway but uh yeah no i mean i remember the feeling was like so weird yeah yeah i can imagine that You know, just again again didn't know what to expect at that early age i actually thought you pissed into a woman to get her pregnant right right i remember thinking um god i think i was in like third grade i thought kissing was the way you got pregnant i didn't think it starts that way it does start that way but and you know one of the girls was like well i kissed my dad i'm like well i guess my theory has got some errors in it i'll have to go back depends on how did you kiss your dad with tongue where did you kiss your dad we were in third grade which set of lips did you kiss your dad with and where did you kiss him oh.

I'm just asking questions. Yeah. I'm not implying. I'm just asking questions. I didn't know. There was just, you know, I didn't know anything about that. So I left it go. You're still kind of clueless. I am clueless. That's true. I have no idea. Not a clue. I keep telling you it's not blow, honey. It's suck. It's suck. You don't seem to complain too much. Not usually. You just don't hear it. I just don't hear it? Okay, thanks. You know, when we're not doing a podcast, you can take those headphones off. I just like them on all the time. But then I hear you.

It's bad if I hear you doing a podcast.

But yeah, so that was your later in life you got it I'd say I was like in um like early college or late yeah I don't know about high school we were I was pretty wild in high school but I don't remember I actually had an orgasm though I just had a lot of sex so I don't know if I actually had an orgasm back then yeah it just sounded kind of weird I mean like when I I lost virginity to that married woman at 17 you know i remember distinctly i fucking had an orgasm oh well yeah yeah it was like it was like kfc and elephants i came in buckets oh i think well a woman's orgasms are different than a man's anyway so yeah she didn't have one it was it was like a five pump chump thing oh well you know that's my first time that's that's true and there was no condom involved it was like yeah it was yeah well it's a new experience a new feeling you're gonna be aroused and excited and bing bada boom that's it you know yeah that's how it goes but so okay so let's get into the the meat and potatoes kind of thing so to speak okay so like you described and that's what i'll use as an example of like in the early stages of us together especially like when i would be eating your pussy sure you had talked about you had like a roller coaster kind of orgasms like a bunch of little ones oh those are waves waves they're like more like waves the roller coaster is like the big one because you go all the way up and then you hit that pinnacle and if it goes and if it if it plateaus that's like my i'll use that's the edging part and then eventually you go.

And I don't want to edge too long because if you edge too long, it ruins the orgasm. I don't know why it does that for me, but it does. Oh, I've heard other people say that too. Oh, really? Yeah, I can only edge for a certain length of time. Then it's like, okay, if I don't go over the edge now, I'm not going to go over the edge. I'm not going to be pissed. Do you actually stop yourself to hold back? To some degree, yeah, I can hold back. I can also push it forward, too. It's like, okay, I really want to come now. I'm right there.

I can just kind of push myself over the edge if I want to come now i just i i'm right there i can i can just kind of like push myself over the edge if i i want to okay because it's like i'm gonna come when i want to come so i can yeah i have like a certain my orgasms are somewhat malleable to a certain degree i can i can kind of mold them a little bit i'm malleable they are kind of yeah it's like if i'm like right there with like a new person it's like i really want to come but if he if he keeps doing what he's Thank you. I can kind of mold them a little bit. Malleable, that's a good word.

Malleable, they are kind of, yeah, it's like if I'm like right there with like a new person, it's like I really want to come, but if he keeps doing what he's doing, it'll be good, but I don't know if he's going to keep doing that. That's why I'm kind of like verbal with guys. Sure. I tell them what I need, and I can definitely push myself over the edge a little bit. Okay, so let me ask you this question. Okay.

Do you think you have your strongest orgasms with the guy the first time you play with him or you know a few times later um probably a few times later because then he knows more we sometimes he talk about it and then he knows going in hey i need to do this i need that or last time you know he was like oh yeah you you really like this so i'm gonna do that so yeah i think it's uh it gets better as you know a person okay sometimes the excitement just being with somebody the first time can be very exciting and that's where i was getting at yeah sometimes there's that give and take yeah that whole it again depends on how much time you spend flirting beforehand that's true too you know if you guys are if you guys are talking for weeks or whatever and you know dirty talk and you get all built up there is that little like i can't wait to see him i can't wait to know him so yeah okay they're sending each other videos and stuff it's like yeah let's you know let's go but yeah for me the other type of orgasm i like to think more of it as a wave it's like little little waves that hit the shore there's you know there are waves um okay if you ever watch water the ocean water coming in it comes in different different heights it comes in at different intervals and that's kind of like my my wave orgasms are like and i can have oh god 40 of them you know sure or more depending on who's doing what when see as a man like i said i've said this before you know you guys are lucky you get to have multiples men men in general well there's there's a few guys out there that can pop two three times pretty quickly pretty quickly but in general most of us are one and done.

Yeah, one and done. We came, we saw, we're going to sleep. Or smoking a cigarette or whatever you do. Whatever, sleeping probably. But the wavy ones aren't as big as the roller coaster ones, but I can have more of them, which is kind of nice. And I noticed too that as I've gotten older, the orgasms have changed too that, like the pre, what did I call that before? Pre-menopausal type orgasms and post-menopausal orgasms. Okay. Totally, totally different. Okay. Cool. So, yeah, I mean, it's, I would like to have more wave orgasms. I don't seem to have as many of them anymore.

I have, like, the roller coaster ones, and they're strong, but they're a lot stronger than what they used to be yeah i mean a lot lot stronger yeah oh yeah you just see them in bed it's so much fun yeah so funny after you have an orgasm thanks that just that just turns me on you talk so sexy no man your whole body's going, I love that. You understand why I give her shit now? Constantly. I love that. I think it's cool. As you laugh at me. I twitch, too. Yeah, you do. I'm not shy about it. But it's erotic when a woman twitches. You don't think it's erotic when you twitch?

It just looks like an epileptic having a seizure. That's not a bad thing, hon. That's not a bad thing at all. All right, so here's, okay, so you have different orgasms, some that will wipe you out and some that just make you smile. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

Now, how does having an orgasm during sex, And again you you know as a woman you can have multiples right throughout the session how does that change your feeling your drive your body your everything what's what's the orgasm like how's that break down i mean so like you're fucking a guy and like you know you know the other day right he had an orgasm he gave you one right orally and then you know you said you had one we were riding them yeah yeah well thank god with these they they weren't like the huge giant roller coaster ones i get from you otherwise i would be like i can't even move i mean the ones i get from you are so freaking strong i'm i'm like I'll see you.

Otherwise, I would be like, I can't even move. I mean, the ones I get from you are so freaking strong. I'm like comatose afterwards. Here's your $20. Thank you. Yeah. So I'd rather not have them all the time unless I'm getting ready to go to bed. That's the last thing I want to do because I can't move. I just, it's like, oh, I have to get up and go to the bathroom. Oh, I don't even want to do that. I'm just going to piss the bed again. Bob, you're awful. I don't know. I don't move. I just, it's like, I have to get up and go to the bathroom. Oh, I don't even want to do that. I'm just kidding.

I'll just piss the bed again. Oh, you're awful. So the ones I have, like, with other partners aren't as strong, thank God. And they seem to motivate me to do more. They kind of give me a little energy. So they're like the middle of the road. So you're kind of like building them up then.

Right, right's you know yeah it's a nice middle of the road orgasm it's like it doesn't wipe me out and it's not the wavy ones where i have like 300 million of them you know well i'm exaggerating i don't have like 40 of them which is still a lot yeah that's you know but as a man we're just jealous yeah but it's um i think if a guy could have that many orgasms like you guys would never stop fucking no i think we'd probably only fuck once a month oh no i don't think i think you guys would fuck more maybe i think you definitely would fuck a lot more i said what i got more orgasms maybe when you're younger you would get over it's like i, it's like, I'm shot.

I'm done. See you next month. And for women, that would probably be better because they used to do, oh, good. I have 29 days to myself. I can chill to build up energy. Keep them out of my hair. Yeah, I mean, like I said, back in the day, I talked about that, my famous Saturday or Sunday, whatever it was. Dick was fucked off practically. Oh, my God. My balls hurt whatever it was. Oh, your dick was fucked off practically. Oh, my God. My balls hurt the next day. Yeah, well, there you go. Because I had cum so much. Right.

I mean, so maybe that's why, I guess, God doesn't make us so we can have multiples because, like, your nuts only hold so much and take so long to build your sperm load back up. Exactly. You know, and you drain the well.

hurts yeah i guess so yeah i guess i wonder um since we don't have anybody here who's a squirter female squirter not right now but um i wonder if if they were to have like orgasm after orgasm after orgasm would be the same thing because they seem to come like like there's so much more fluid yeah i keep waiting to see him like dehydrate yeah i'm serious you know like at the parties great yeah you know i had you know one party when i had the four women that night all four more squirters and they squirted like i said they came i don't know i know 20 30 times well that was just that one girl oh that was just the other three the other three i did on the other bed oh jesus christ oh yeah no and they all squirted you know a bunch of times and you sit there and like i said they you know you saw what they looked like when they came up so maybe they were dehydrated yeah that's why they're like i need something to drink i i need a they couldn't walk up the steps they're like where's my gatorade i need gatorade Thank you.

They looked like when they came up, so maybe they were dehydrated. Yeah, that's why they're like, oh, I need something to drink. I need a... They couldn't walk up the steps. They're like, where's my Gatorade? I need Gatorade. It's game time. Come on. Yeah. They have to put one of those coolers on the football side of the bed. I have bleachers down there sitting on their way. Put me in, coach. But, yeah. That's not a bad idea, actually. Put me in, coach? No, no, the whole Gatorade down there by the beds. So, but, yeah, no, I just, you know, wanted to see, I mean, everyone's different, too.

Yeah, yeah. I would love to get somebody else's input on this because I know my orgasms pretty intimately and you know yours intimately, but I'm sure everybody has a different thing. Yeah. And that's really all we can talk to. And again, if you want to share your experience with your orgasms, email us at hotwifepodcasts at gmail.com. Yeah, we'd love to hear your input. Yeah.

You you know because i mean i've we've talked to other people on air and off air and like their orgasms are definitely different but i'd like to explore that just a little bit more and you know and can they control them like i can kind of you know push mine one way the other a little bit and and can you know do you you get dehydrated if You squirt so much I mean it seems like you would you know it doesn't hurt you know I would imagine you have to to drink because oh yeah I would imagine like that young lady that was up in Allentown that was a big squirter she would get up and drink more water and then come back in you know so yeah but she squirted it sounded like oh my god literally i mean when she did that was sitting on the edge of the bar yeah when she's laying down she actually sprayed oh wow i mean i know your shirt was so so it was the back of my shirt my back of my pants she sprayed it was like fucking driving driving rain as i was getting ready to get those glasses i had the wipers on yeah no it was good you know but yeah but when she sat on that bar and came i if if i wouldn't have would not have known what was going on i would have sworn somebody took a small bucket of water and poured it on the bar because you could hear it go all the way down the bar and not just dribble onto the floor but pour onto the floor.

That had to be a half a gallon of fluid. What did we used to call her? It was called an LJ, like Long John Silver's. You know the old commercials where all of a sudden there's a bucket of water that comes onto the people eating there at Long John Silver's because I guess it's so fresh. Was that the whole thing? But, yeah, her boyfriend caught an algae because of that. And it was literally like that. I mean, it sounded like a bucket of water being poured on the bar. It was amazing. I've never seen anything like that in my whole life. Not in my whole life. That was amazing.

And, you know, I remember we were playing with them in our bedroom. I remember tasting like lollipop water. I know I've mentioned this before, but that was a weird thing. I was like, who's sucking on a here in, you know, I think it was the four of us were all messing around. And I kept thinking, who has a freaking lollipop? Because I'm tasting fucking lollipop water here. Yeah. I can't even tell you what flavor of lollipop. It just tasted sweet, you know. It was. It was like the most sweetest pussy juice I think I've ever tasted. And I found those videos the other day. Oh, did you? Oh, my God.

I just don't remember what it was called because i didn't really you know think about no no oh you have to dig them out and we'll we'll play them for when the patreon shows because they are amazing i i don't know if it translate well but you can really hear the water like her cum juice like just yep oozing you know, the bar that she was sitting on. It was just, it was crazy. It was intense. Yeah, it was, yeah, definitely. That was probably the most amazing orgasm I've ever seen. And she just did that with just using a toy. Oh, yeah.

You know know so that was that was crazy crazy so my orgasms are nothing like that very few people yeah that's true i mean at least mine we put a you know t-shirt down for me because i kind of spoogey and you know the saliva from you and you know i do make a little bit of a mess that way but yeah but i don't you know you don't have to have like you know rubber sheets and put down a tarp and you know come in with an umbrella and you know and wear a slicker i don't know how to wear my fucking uh waiter what are those things the kids put on their arms oh there's the swimmies oh what the heck are they card they called?

Yeah, those little swimmies. The things you put on your arms, the inflatable things. Yeah. It's so smooth. They threw their kid in the pool. Oh, no. You know, the kid didn't want to go in. Oh, no. Threw the kid in the pool, and the kid puts his arm up. Oh, no, and it came off. It came right up. Oh, Jesus Christ. Don't throw your kid in the pool. They'll never forget you. You've got to grow up sometimes. Yeah just scar them for life. Yeah, just scar them for life. That's great. That's terrible. But I can't find it right now. Oh, you'll have to save that for another.

Yeah, I'll have to eventually find it. It was amazing. I don't know if it would translate well, though, hon. I just wanted to play the sound of the question. Oh, my God. I was like crazy, crazy. It wouldn't be under her name or anything. Somehow, I think, because I was just cleaning up some files, and I saw, I think it was just LJ or something like that, and it's like, oh. I wonder what that is. Oh, yes, I remember. Yeah. It's like, oh, okay. Yeah. Well, if you keep searching, I have... Oh, found it. Oh, you did? Wow. Nice. So, let's see here. Let's open this up.

That would be interesting to hear. I'm going to have to go to the end here. Because that's where the good stuff is. She's all creamed up. Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah, she's going at it. Yeah, she's going faster and faster It's such an intense look on her face. Yeah yeah she's like biting her lip and stuff yep oh now she's licking all that juice off that vibrate okay anyway yeah you can hear the water going down the bar she was sitting on the edge of a bar they had in their basement masturbating and uh so you heard as she's spraying, it's rolling off of the bar, hitting the floor, hitting the bar.

Yeah, so it's like all over the place. If it helps at all, she was gorgeous. Yes. She had an incredible body. Incredible body. That was like amazing. It was probably one of the most erotic masturbation videos I've seen, like right there, experienced. Yeah, we got to experience that a few times. Yeah, we did. We're such sluts. Say that with reverence. I'm sorry. We are such sluts. That's right. I pay good money to be that slut. It's not a bad thing. Yeah, so again, the different levels. We talked about there's a name for something I have. It happened. I had to talk to my doctor about it.

I don't ejaculate anymore. My orgasm. This is the first I've heard of that. Yeah, well, I lied to you. I fake them for you. just don't ejaculate anymore my orgasm this is the first I've heard of that yeah well I lied to you I fake them for you just don't look at the bottle of Jorgens next to the bed the bottle of what?

spunk lube because spunk lube looks like spunk I thought all this time you were having an orgasm and here was spunk lube I was like boy your cum tastes like spunk lube right before it cum didn't you notice I go look Yo ono motor scooter yeah and you look over i quick you know pump some spunk lube on my cock and then you're like oh my god you can't worry it's like well yoko ono's turn on yeah she is my favorite recording artist sounds like a group of chinese people thrown into a blender. But I'm not picking on Chinese people. I'm just picking on Yoko Ono.

But, yeah, so my cum load somehow diverged into my bladder. Right. So I wind up peeing out my load. But the best part of that is that my orgasms have doubled in strength. Yeah, like your toes, well, if you had all 10 of them. If I had 10. Right, curl. You pick on the toe challenge. You've even said, the toe that's not there is curling. I was like, that's fucked up. Do you still have those phantom pains or phantom sensations? Occasionally, yeah. Yeah, that's been a couple years now since you've lost your toes. Well, October will be a year for the right foot. Right, exactly.

And March, coming up March, will be three years? Yeah, three years for the left foot. So, but yeah, it's kind of like weird. You're like, oh, my toes are curling and they're not even there. It's like, now that's an orgasm, baby. That's what I can do. Make your toes curl. They're not even there. Giving yourself a lot of credit. I know. Did you ever think I'm thinking of someone else? You could be. Hey, I don't care how you get the orgasm.

That's fine don't care you know aunt jemima i love me some pancake syrup that woman she can make something sweet yeah that's a lot of sweet that's why i lost my toes that's why i lost my toes um but uh yeah so yeah so for me the orgasms you know in what i'd say it's been with the last five years i've actually gotten stronger yeah and and almost the scary part i mean they're so strong oh yeah you get like back spasms and everything else because your whole body goes into like uh a crazy spasm like you, you arch your back and you're, like, flailing. It's actually me just doing some sit-ups.

Some orgasm ballet. Orgasm ballet. I'm just like, oh, my God, I'm going to just interpretive dance. How do I think this orgasm would – how would I express this orgasm? Let me just flail this and move this. Quote this verse of the Bible. Yeah, right. Speak in tongues. Oh, tongue. Yep. So, but, yeah.

So, and again, there's, you know, for everybody, everybody too there's different things that make you come hard like you know if you're you know i think like we've talked about how like when we're playing around stuff like that especially giving each other oral we get to go into our mental game and our little fantasies or dreams or whatever um but when you're having sex with someone like in the videos you're being more cognitive of like the camera and stuff like that and also them and that's what I'm saying so your orgasms might not always be as strong because you're not you're distracted when you have the mental game you're hitting those buttons in your head that are you know really help get the motor running right exactly you know yeah exactly but you have a if you're and with your if you're with a new person you have other distractions or if i'm on video you're right there's there's more distractions you have the lights you have this there's you know whatever a new person that i have to be you know a little more um attentive to Thank you.

right there's there's more distractions sure you have the lights you have this there's you know whatever a new person that i have to be you know a little more um attentive to sure so yeah but the orgasms are still good and another thing i wanted to touch on like different toys will give me different orgasms okay well and there's for women there are different types of orgasms you have catorial oh yeah vaginal yeah and there are anal orgasms which i guess guys can have anal orgasms i would imagine i would imagine now for me anal there's got to be some clitoral action there like if i'm have a guy's cock nice thick cock in my ass if he has like a little bit of like um stubble like the stubble pubic hair you know maybe didn't shave quite as smooth it'll it'll just hit my you're talking to me aren't you yeah i am i just yeah how did you know that it'll just hit my clit the right way and well you should know because you're usually dry heaving as you say shut the fuck up i never like okay i hardly ever dry heave okay, you usually look away so you can think of someone else.

No, it's like, honey, your cock is so big in my mouth. It got stuck between my teeth. I hardly ever say that either. So just stop exaggerating. I hardly ever say that. Not when you're around. You never hear me say that. But I also know that different toys, depending on the type of toy it is, the type of vibration it has, and what other... And your mood has something to do with it, too. Oh, God, yeah. Sure. Yeah, if I'm in a pissed-off mood, I don't think I'm going to have a great orgasm. Only when you're not in a pissed-off. What was that, honey? You said I love you.

I thought that's what you said. I said that. Better straight up, Mr. I'll take you out back and show you what for. Yeah, you show me what you want me to do. Show you my honey-do list. I was going to have sex with you, but now you've got to build that walkway back there. You've got to, you know, trim the hill. Trim the hedges. Come on. Okay, honey, I've got it all done.

Well, that's good because i'm tired now anyway yeah no so i mean we've talked before that the mental game has a lot to do with orgasms i think the mental game has a lot to do with a lot of things but yeah orgasm is definitely one of them yeah like if you're in a a certain mood like a good mood or whatever it it's going to affect your orgasm, of course. You know, that definitely just makes sense. You would think, yeah. Yeah. You know, maybe you are in a bad mood. Having an orgasm will get you out of it. I don't know. There's been times I've been in a bad enough mood that I don't want sex.

Yeah, me too. Because I know I'm not going to be able to concentrate. Concentration really does make a difference. If I can't concentrate, if I'm – sometimes – That's why I tell you don't talk. I'll know it's you. Shut up. You put a bag over my head. I said just don't talk so I can fantasize it's someone else. You put the bag over my head with somebody else's face on it, like Angelina Jolie's or whoever. It works sometimes. Yeah, sometimes, yeah. But then I still see your tattoo on your ass, and it's like, fuck her. I'll take it off. Yeah, I would have said pictures of that.

I'll put makeup on it. There's a couple of times you get so turned on, I know you told me this, and your mind goes to all these different scenarios you find erotic, and you can't Thank you. Like there's a couple of times you get so turned on. I know you told me this. And your mind goes to like all these different scenarios that you find erotic and you can't like settle on one and concentrate on it. You start going down the road like, oh, this is good. Oh, this is good. Oh, what about this one?

Also, it's like when I read a book of some sort, it's like you read something and it takes your mind into something else. You start thinking about that. It's like, God damn it. Forget about the book. But the same thing with an orgasm because you're – it happens to me every once in a while. I can usually block out everything else. I'm like, this is what I want to think about. This is the fantasy I want. Everything else just go away. But if you're jumping around from scenario to scenario, you kind of lose your mojo. And it's like, oh, man, I can't concentrate on anything. I can't come.

So I know you talk about that. You're like, I'm so excited. I just don't know what to think about. I'm like, well, just think about one thing. One thing. Yeah, but there's some days that just so many things are arousing, and you can't. You think you would come like this, and you don't. You'd think so. Yeah, you would think. And, you know, again, I'm not trying to jump topics. It just happens.

if i start to jump topics i just i can just push the ones out like it's like my dirty couch dance little fantasy that's the one that's getting me there tonight so just push everything out of the way just push it out of the way yeah well generally i'm pretty good with that but just every that. But just every once in a while, too many things. It's like you're too excited, if you can say that. Yeah, it happens. Jumping all over the place. I'll take it while it happens. Yeah, I mean, it's kind of cool. You think you would come faster, but it doesn't. It just kind of, like, throws everything off.

And you're like, I can't fucking come. I have to just concentrate. So, yeah, I'd be interested to hear from um about the different styles of orgasms or things that make them have orgasms um you know we'd love to hear from you email us at hotwifepodcast at gmail.com or there's even um we had um one of our usual listeners wrote in about her climbing a rope and having an orgasm like in gym class. Yeah, it was Jay. It's like if I did that, I'd fall off the rope and you'd find me at the bottom of the freaking gym class. There's no way I could climb a rope and have an orgasm.

See, what I would do is if Jay was climbing the rope, I'd lay at the bottom of it. So she falls, she falls on your face. She could fall on my face or my dick or whatever. If she's having orgasms and she drips, I catch that. Yeah, it's a win. It's a win-win for everybody. I don't know if I could hold on to do that. I can't have an orgasm like standing up as easily because you know how you just lose all sense of balance. I know that with only eight toes.

How many times do you have to come standing up though most of the time you're lying down i just i'm just talking about balance anyway so i mean whether you're in bed not in bed you're going to lose your balance but yeah that's another thing like having like sex and like weird positions and and having an orgasm like um there was one time that i we were doing something one guy like he picked me up and started fucking me like it picked me up and fucked me while he was standing up yeah and it's like i can't because i'm holding on to i can't come that way looks erotic it does it's so impractical it looks really hot it's i guess it's a good like warm-up kind of a thing yeah but again maybe when i was younger i did that i don't remember but i mean like even the aspect to you pick the woman up and like you're holding her while she's sucking your dick and you're eating her pussy right standing up standing now i look at something like that go fuck no my back hurts yeah well we were with um it was a couple like a year and a half ago and we were with a playmate and he just like just picked me up and started fucking me like standing up and did do you know who i've noticed is really they love to do that or black gentleman this guy wasn't black no i'm not saying yeah i'm not saying like it's exclusive right i've noticed a lot of the black playmates you've had have like are big on picking up and like you know you're that fun size i guess i am yeah so yeah i tell them put me down first thing the lawyers have sent us the bills for the hernias yeah i i have to i have to work on that i'm sorry i will i will work on that the hernias and they lift me up and it's like Jenny Craig can I recommend Jenny Craig go low The hernias.

And they lift me up. It's like, Jenny Craig. Can I recommend Jenny Craig? Go low. This sex session is brought to you by Weight Watchers. Weight Watchers. Yeah, you have to watch out, you know. See, that'd be the funny part. The video be like, the video's going, and he picks you up, and all of a sudden, you know, say you're 69 and standing up. Oh, my God. And it's going, and all of a sudden, like, the commercial. Oh, the commercial comes in? Like, the screen pops up, and all of a sudden, you hear, ah, and he drops you. It's like, fuck.

Brought to you by Weight Watchers That's terrible That's just awful You can tell she's good With putting stuff in her mouth That's true There you go Hey that cock looks like a nice Thick piece of sausage How many points are how many points are penises was that the weight watcher thing i think they have some kind of a system with points i don't know you know okay how many calories is a cock i don't know how much calories has come i don't care okay i guess you told me i only care if if i if shoot the load, does that mean I get rid of those calories? Is that like burning calories? Good question.

Yeah, if you eat the cum, it's 100 calories. The energy you use to get rid of it is two. How the fuck is that fair? That's true. God has a sense of humor, and I don't always appreciate it. Well, I don't know. How much work did you have to get that orgasm? Thank you. that's true God has a sense of humor and I don't always appreciate it well I don't know how much work did you have to get that orgasm that was like fucking 15 seconds of sweating it out sweating to the oldies that was an oldie sweating oh I got that backwards oh my god was quite a workout, man. 15 seconds. Look at me.

But you don't get guys that last 15 seconds often, do you? No, not often. I can honestly say that. At least, you know, even the quick ones last a few minutes. Well, I got shit to do. I don't got time. I have got time. I got shit to get done. You're looking at your watch as you're fucking, you know, come on in. It's three, two, one. All right, got to go. I'm just watching the heart rate thing on my watch just to make sure I don't go into cardiac arrest. I have my finger on the oxygen sensor making sure I don't go into cardiac arrest.

I have my finger on the oxygen sensor, making sure I'm not dead yet. It's like the cardio mobile thing. You got two fingers on it. Vince, what are you doing? Nothing. I have the jumper. I have the cable, a battery. The jumper cables are just in case. Okay. You never know. I mean, as you get older, I mean, sometimes you have to have all this stuff right there. Most people's sex rooms have, you know, St. Andrew's Cross, maybe some whips, handcuffs. No, not ours. We have defibrillators, you know, epinephrine, you know, all kinds of shit just in case you go into cardiac arrest.

yeah well you know all kinds of shit just in case you go into cardiac arrest yeah well you know it's a tough life oh my god maybe we should keep so much shit around like oxygen mask comes down out of the out of the ceiling like an airplane yay that's all to think about you know I don't know, man. I was flatlined later. I'd use an oxygen mask at night when you fart. Well, I guess. You see, it has multiple purposes. Multiple purposes. So you never know. I mean, see. All right.

Well, I think we covered that topic I want to start putting out shit in our room just in case people see a battery jumper cable it's like ooh you guys are into kinky shit no we had a guy die on us the other week almost died almost died to bring him back oh his car died he got a little bit too over excited Donna kind of likes him older well you never know I don never know. Actually, just a real quick. What did he do with a plunger? Well, that's a multi-use thing. That's multi-use. Wait, I got a quick story. This is a true story.

When I was in high school, one of my best friends, she had a friend who was cheating on his wife.

and he was cheating on his wife with another woman and he literally had a heart attack on top of her and died in the middle of sex hand to god it absolutely happened i remember the guy i i remember her talking about him quite a bit he was like a family friend and he's like nobody has the heart to tell the wife and he literally died on this other woman she had like get out from there's a lot of stories like that yeah but there was one i heard about that was a called a wife's tale right where urban legend guy had i don't think he was married though he was just him and his girlfriend and he they were older right or and um they dressed up it was like batman and wonder woman and she was handcuffed to the bed and he was up on the bed jumping and stuff like that and doing whatever they're doing and he got his head got hit by the ceiling fan and actually killed him it didn't like it like broke his neck and he he fucking died laid on top of her and she was stuck handcuffed to the bed so she was yelling for like you know hours until someone finally heard her and came and let her loose i think the urban legend i heard of that one is that he was a superman thing and his cape got caught whatever in the ceiling fan yeah but something like that strangled him oh is that what happened okay well that's this one these these call me fake but my time whatever with my friend i remember her telling me like it was yesterday and i was like oh my god she was yeah nobody nobody has a heart to tell the wife nobody has the heart so that's a little fucked up rest in peace yeah seriously he rested on a piece yeah he sure did i don't think she was real happy about it though i was right ready to come and you fucking dial me yeah well she probably wouldn't attend his funeral or pay for it at that point yeah yeah she probably was like um dude what do you do like climb out from under him and just like sneak out i mean they found him the next day naked it was like could you get him dressed you know maybe he just like oh he just had a heart attack in his sleep but he was like naked it's like rub a lot of questions it's like how i must have been you know i mean i would just want to get the fuck out of there i get it i get it but you know put some fucking clothes on him so it doesn't like you know arouse too much suspicion they're just gonna strip naked in your autopsy that's true but they're gonna be like well he found naked well why is he naked well was he sleeping maybe sleeps naked i don't know whatever maybe he's a nudist maybe but it I was like...

There's a lot of reason to be know. Whatever. Maybe he's a nudist. Maybe. But it was. There's a lot of reason to be naked. Yeah. Here's a little known fact. Okay. We were all born naked. You know what? I'm naked under my clothes right now. Let's keep the clothes on. I love the way you talk. You know, I got you something sexy to wear. I got you a parka. A parka. I got you a burka. I can see your eyes. That's it. And that has a little shield to drop down. They got those screens on that, too. It's just like. How do I fucking see through that?

If your women are that ugly, you've got to cover them that much. That's why you got me three of them. They're different colors. To wear them at the same time. Yeah. I can still see too much. Put the next one on. No, I can still see too much put the next one on no i can still see too much you've heard of three bagger three bagger three burka so no you're not you're a beautiful woman oh my god here's your 20 bucks i went up to 40 sorry fuck well it looks like i'm gonna be abagger. Then I just don't have 40 bucks in my pocket in here. Want to earn it the hard way? Oh, that is hard, too.

I mean, difficult. Ooh. Damn. All right. Okay. Let's wrap this up, babe. We're going downhill quick. All right. So, hope you all enjoy your Labor Day weekend coming up. Oh, yeah. And, you know, we've all earned it. Work our ass off. Yeah. We'll still be doing a show for Monday. And there'll be a Patreon show. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. So, again, urge you to go to our website, hotwifepodcast.com, and you can listen to the podcast there.

You can't listen to the exclusive ones there you have to join our patreon right there's a link there that you can go five hours a month um it's called the uh vince bourbon fund oh my god yes it is called that yeah but um or you can just go to patreon.com slash hotwifepodcast, all one word. And you'll get exclusive content. The only way you're going to hear those shows is if you join Patreon. We're going to keep the juicy ones there. We've been going on pretty soon. It'll be two years doing this. I don't know how much more we can talk about. We always come up with something. Yeah, we do.

I just wonder many times more can these people listen to us oh well and again our numbers um i said this on the other show but i'm still a little grateful our numbers keep growing and i'm really uh flattered and humbled and i want to thank everyone so i'm going to say goodbye good night whatever you want to say it, and we will talk to you next podcast. All right. Have a great night, everybody.