5 Tips for oral to a woman

Transcript

Speaker1: Welcome to the Hot Wife Podcast, where we dive into discussions about relationships, intimacy, and everything in between. Before we begin, we want to make it clear that the views expressed on this podcast are solely those of the host and guests, and should be taken as opinions, not professional or medical advice. Additionally, we remind all listeners that this podcast is intended for adults over the age of 18. Unauthorized rebroad accompanied by my wonderful husband vince now i'm'm being accompanied. Well, okay, you're writing the show, I'm just a fluff. Whoa, what are you doing? Trying to turn the fan off. Oh, okay. He's turning lights on and things are like flashing. I was like, what the fuck is that? It's remote control, I have fun with buttons. Yes, yes, you do. I meant there was a girl I used to know her name was Buttons. Oh, her name was Buttons. Yeah, ceiling fans off. That way you're not chilling out too bad. You know, it's funny. Just a couple of days ago, we were complaining how hot it is, and today it's like. Fucking yesterday, man. I was working down by the pool, and it looked like I fell in the pool, but that was just all water fucking pouring out of my pores. Yeah, me too. I was pretty... And now it's like beautiful. It's like 70. It's 20 degrees colder than it was yesterday. Yeah. And I feel it. But anyway... It's nice, but it's chilly. Yeah. Chilly. I don't know. A couple months, you'll be making that.'ll be supporting a little headache tonight and i just got home from work what a half hour ago yeah yeah i'm still stressed uh it'll get better i'm working on it currently have you just big shout out shout out to wayne oh yes did you did you tell him about the book We talked about the shirt okay you talked about the shirt so i got in the other day a book from wayne and a keychain yes keychain had a small set of testicles a little bit of hair on too well it's something assimilate hair yeah and then i got a book from wayne that i thought was very funny when i read the title the title is living with a small penis i thought that was funny uh-huh an hour or so later i opened it up so okay let me see what this thing's going to tell me it was just a fucking notebook so i could write my life down. Well, they're not going to give you any ideas on how to live with a small penis.
Speaker2: And that's why we love Wayne.
Speaker1: That's a cute book. Very cute.
Speaker2: So thank you for that, Wayne. Made our night the other night.
Speaker1: Yeah, we couldn't stop laughing.
Speaker2: Very humorous. And actually, my 28- 28 year old daughter lives with us
Speaker1: and uh last night she was what the fuck is that book i said it's a gift from a friend she goes do i want to know she goes that's wrong dad i said open it up she opens it up and then she started laughing her ass off i said yeah i'm supposed to write down my life story well there it is so anyway if again thanks wayne um if you want to reach out to us info at hot wife podcast.com if you think you need some lube oh spunk lube.com it is good It doesn't break down. It doesn't get sticky or gooey. It's very silky and smooth. If you've got a big something to go into, a small something else, whatever it may be.
Speaker2: Or you just want to stroke something.
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Speaker2: If you're going to put something you stroke into something that strokes it for you, like we talked about before.
Speaker1: Any kind of toy, please. Use a lubricant, please.
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Speaker1: Yeah.
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Speaker2: make sure in the discount code area you type in hotwife, all one word, you'll get 10% off your order. Let's see what Donna's doing.
Speaker1: Yes, hotwifedonnalyn.com. And that is actually where all my links Thank you. um let's see what donna's doing yes hot wife donnalyn.com and i that is uh actually where my hot all my links and everything in there is all the places i'm posting to as well as so um my one guy asked me for my amazon account so it should be in there it is in there yeah good all right so last show we talked about five tips for sucking dick. Yeah, this one is going to be... For giving... It's a new show. Yeah, okay. This show was the partner article to it about five tips for licking pussy or cunning linguists. Now, I printed it out. I did not read it. I know nothing about it yeah you read it i read it so you're gonna you know read it off and give me your two cents and i'll tell you what the professionals say yeah okay i think you've been doing it all wrong no i'm only kidding well i am willing to start looking some more pussies to correct whatever it is i'm doing wrong. Oh, yeah. I have to go into training.
Speaker2: I'll do it, God damn it.
Speaker1: You are one. You take one for the team.
Speaker3: You really do.
Speaker1: You go above and beyond.
Speaker2: I'll take more than one for the team.
Speaker1: You'll take the whole team.
Speaker2: And the opposing team.
Speaker1: Okay, well, I'm just going to jump right in then. And this is actually the exact opposite. They say, don't dive right in. No. Which makes sense. And I've said that before. Yeah. People have asked me, what are your tips? And I tell them. Tease. Tease. Lots of teasing. Lots of teasing. Make them. I love, personally, before you read that part. Okay. I love to, and you know this. Tell me if I'm wrong.'m wrong i love to tease like nibble and lick all around the pussy make the woman like squirm right watch her get wet watch her fucking pussy swell right right make her beg you to put your tongue on her clit i i notice with me i'm like i'm trying to like maneuver my pussy so like your tongue is not the only one who's done that you're just gonna like no over here you're going over there you run it up the outside of the lips yeah inside the thighs nibble the crease between the thighs and the lips and you know even like right above the slit yeah just oh yeah just right up there and then go down and tickle the taint baby yep that's exactly what they say they're saying like you know nibbling stroking in her thighs or nibbling uh avoiding uh avoiding the whole vagina area you know in t's and t's 10 15 minutes don't touch it yep not let that thing reach out and kiss you you want that thing open up like stroking her breasts kissing her all over her body take your fingers lightly run them down from her nipples down to her thighs massage your feet while you're licking her while you're licking her like around her pussy bring your arms back yeah yeah just massage her feet run them up your run up her thighs yeah all right let's just let's just turn this off and go upstairs yeah that's good that's all good stuff right there especially the feet i'm like oh yeah do the do you do the soles of my feet you just do the soles the soles and i do and you do it's all good it's all good okay it also says here that this is like pretty right on it's um work slowly and gently on the vulva area which is like you know i like talking mound and you know that kind of uh uh start slowly it's all about getting that woman in gear yeah kissing licking slowly from the outer edges and and working your way in like around the like the mons uh pubis like the little mound there love that area licking that and then you know even go up even go up and tease the belly button oh yeah absolutely oh yeah i do take a little break take a little break you can even tickle the asshole but don't go to the clit not yet you can You can tease around the asshole. Tick the inside of the ass cheeks a little. Yep. See, this is not a man, so ass eating is approved. It's fine. Okay. Ass eating is approved. Oh, my God. It's when there's testicles you have to move out of the way. Not approved. I'm sorry. I don't find it offensive. Not even a little bit. You shouldn't, but I can. Okay, you have been abundantly clear about that. That's fine. But yeah, it's what they're, I mean, everything you're doing is right on, and this article kind of backs that right up. Well, I have lots of letters from women, letters of reference. References, yeah, of course. I've even had, as you know, I've had husbands ask me, whatever you did to my wife, can you teach me? They were talking about spreading her lips and gently licking the inside of them, which is, yeah, but you're not going into the clit, not yet yet make that thing swell yeah it hurts yeah yeah and you're avoiding the clit right now because instead of this it's all about continuing to tease the vagina in order to really get her turned on so that makes sense maybe every two to three minutes of this you might just just tease the clit just a real light
Speaker2: touch your tongue barely touch it and you'll see you shiver but then go get away from it
Speaker1: get away from it
Speaker2: or just
Speaker1: let her know oh yeah that's where we're going but not yet
Speaker2: and you're going to see her grow and sit there
Speaker3: and be like
Speaker2: oh come on please
Speaker3: please
Speaker2: please
Speaker1: you know yes
Speaker3: yes
Speaker1: I'm right there
Speaker4: yeah
Speaker1: your knees
Speaker2: your knees are getting closer together
Speaker1: I'm squeezing my legs together, my thighs together. It's like, yes. Do I have to put a drop cloth down on that chair? You might. Oh, my God. Okay, so we agree with this article so far. I'm telling you what I'm doing. That article is agreeing with me as far as i'm concerned oh okay whatever mr smarty pants but yeah it's all about the tease i don't like when guys go in and they just go right for the clit it's like ah you just overstimulated me and it and and when i'm not worked up it hurts it's you know it's it doesn't feel good until you get like revved up it's not pleasurable but so they're they're in the right ballpark very good okay now up to the clit you can be gentle on the yes you do yes when it comes time to touch the clit just make your tongue barely touch it barely touch it yep you'll see that thing throb if you do it right. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, I know. I've been there. I don't know what my things are doing down there. I don't know what my lips are doing. You're looking at the inside of the back of your head. Sometimes, but I don't know what my body is doing. Oh, you'll see the clit grow. Yeah. You'll see the inner lip start to swell and fill. That's all fun. And then what I'll do. Fun fun what i tend to do at this point now is now i'll go down and put my tongue more at the hole right and like lick the inner lips up just to the bottom of the clit oh yes just to the bottom of the clit so the clit's getting stimulation technically but more of the nerve endings around the uh lips and the hole. Yeah, I really love it. And then you want to see those inner lips will fucking fill and swell, and then it's, you know, they're kissing you back. Oh, absolutely. I love it when you lick the hole. I mean, that's like a weird way to put it, but it's not the clit, it's not the lips. It's like just around or over the hole. mean that's like a weird way to put it but it's not it's not the clit it's not it's like just around or over the hole i find that very um it's almost like your tongue fucking yeah yeah well like you can start the bottom hole and just flick over the hole just a little bit like you're not going to the top of the hole and you go from there to the bottom of the clit yeah women like to say men don't know where the clit is well you need to fucking find
Speaker2: out you will be surprised hold her down how much your sex life will change when you know how to work a pussy when you know where the clit is and in all fairness uh you've seen me do one or two women right run to two one or two um hundred and um i i'm very uh i try to be very uh cognitive of i mean every woman oops sorry every woman likes a little something different so what part of this whole process even the first step is being aware paying attention to how the woman is reacting oh yes absolutely that goes for a prior show when you're sucking a dick. You know, we talked about licking the balls. Yep. Some guys, like me, will, fuck yeah, baby. And then some guys are like, okay. You know, but then it's like also that guy might want his balls tugged. You've had guys want you to grab their dick like, you know, like you want to squeeze it until it pops like a zit yeah you know but anyway let's get back to the fun stuff to pussies anyway it's back to the fun stuff enough about penises please yeah plenty of penis stuff there but um penis had its chance last show yeah that's true that's true if you pay attention and we'll get into some of the other things here i'm sure yes yeah like entering the pussy with your finger i said we're gonna get into it don't jump ahead we're gonna get into it i'm sure hey i'm going through my list of like step by step here um you know just you know so like just teasing some more now it's getting a little more um intense teasing like i said with going from the hole up to the bottom of the clit licking the outer lips maybe even just gently pulling on them with your with your mouth yeah the inner lips sorry you know just like grabbing with your lips and just gently pulling on them oh no that's all good that's all good knees are getting tight well um there's one thing here it says uh um uh focus on the clitoral hood because it is known it's known fact that most women actually get more pleasure out of the indirect clitoral stimulation which makes sense now the clitoral hood i don't see that being indirect stimulation what happened depends on how yeah what winds up happening it's like a doctor yeah i know um because i've spent enough time down there um that like as the quit swells that hood disappears
Speaker1: oh does it the hood kind of it's kind of like forced mind always seems like it's there
Speaker2: no you're when you're quit when you're like really going at 110 your quit pops out and the hood goes back yeah the hood goes back a little bit it's a more of a trick to try to get to the hood without
Speaker1: I'll see you next time. When you're really going at 110%, your clit pops out, and the hood goes back. Yeah, the hood goes back a little bit. So it's more of a trick to try to get to the hood without touching the clit. But if the clit's not popping, yeah, you just bring your tongue up. Like, come from the top of the mons pubis. Yeah, yeah, the little mound there. Yeah, come down and stop above the clit. You're going to be touching the hood. Right. Yeah, like, like again below and above and if you pull the pussy apart right then you can go all around the clit right and then that just really just goes crazy for him yeah yeah but even for me clitoral stimulation can't be constant it has to be intermittent like it has to be like lick my clit and then do something else like you know lick my lips or you know tongue fuck me and then or whatever then go back to the clip because if you stay on the clit it gets i think it's overstimulated and then it kind of like deadens it yeah it's like um you know have you been doing anything with vibration in your hand for a while sure your hands go numb while your click goes numb too if you have a toy certain toys will do that it'll make my click go numb and it's like well that just was not good yeah i get it yeah you just can't keep it on your click forever i try to keep moving yeah keep moving around in direct pleasure to indirect teasing keep it like so again it's like a roller coaster ride as you describe things yeah it is it's like you hit the quit and you go start going up a big hill but then all of a sudden you go and move around to other areas it still feels good but you're kind of coming down a little or your plateau so yeah you didn't go up a big hill you went up a little hill right you know it's a wee and then you know as we get into more of it we'll get to the big the big hill let's go to the big hill i want the big hill but you're talking about adding fingers and that's what they said adding fingers is a good yeah is a good effect yep and again this is where the finger add is where it's going to depend on the woman you're with okay there are some women who want you to go deep right but initially i never say that you still need to see how wet they are right so what i tend to do is just put the tip of my index finger in whichever hand is more comfortable for you right and you have more agility with right you put just the tip in up to the first knuckle at best and up to the elbow yeah just up to the elbow um and just like spin like little circles oh just spin a little circle see you know like getting her loosed up right and you can gauge right then and there it's like okay she's wet enough or let's just do this a little bit while i'm still teasing her quit right and you know now you you know you got her doing the elvis thing like her pelvis is shaking right yeah she might even be grabbing your ears your hair trying to pull you in closer right you know and again if you see she's really wet then slide your finger in a little more keep moving it around but now what i tend to do is go from my finger on its side right to my finger going the the front of my finger going towards her ass i guess i'll put it that way so now i can curve my finger up because now within the first couple inches generally is where you're going to run into the g-spot yep and that's what even says here and touch her g-spot by having your palm facing up finger uh facing upwards and your fingers curled up to feel a rough part there you go inside her now so my experience with different women is some women it's um if you've ever touched a cat's tongue or something like that it's got like these little nodules yeah stuff a woman woman's pussy is like that, but they're bigger generally. Some women are more bigger than others. And generally, when a woman's really roused, you could feel those bumps. It's not true in all cases. There's some women, the bumps are real, real minor. Right, right. And again, so again, I'm doing circles. I'm doing circles and flicking my finger, like bending it. Bending it, yeah, like come hither, come hither. It's kind of doing an oval. Oh, okay. Okay. And again, you don't stop licking. No, no. And again, that's going to be the same thing as what you're doing with your tongue. You're going to go in there a little bit, tickle it, pull it out just a little bit. And then, like, I'll i'll take my finger and now like leave it right at the opening of the hole right like tease it so it's almost like almost like you're taking the tip of your dick and just like barely like oh god i love that too now the hand is between your knees oh my goodness okay this is a good show tell me it's not what i do that is what you do and they even said um they even kind of said about here especially the rough part they're like the rough the rough parts inside you always said that some women want you the g-spot's kind of like rough where those little dimples are and some women want you to go deeper they want to have the fantasy or whatever of like a bigger penis in them. Right. So what you do is you just go to the back, continue it, that motion. Right. And then work your way to the front where the G-spot is. And again, you just move it around. You know what some guys do? And I just, I don't like it, but I never know how to tell somebody to stop doing that. They stick their finger and then they just go in and out and in and out i'm like ah some women like that though yeah some women do some women want you to fuck them hard like that well it wouldn't be so bad if they had like let me get more worked up well you know i think that's a problem it's like it's like no i'm not there yet i'm not there yet so i have to like that i think from what i've witnessed um a lot of guys might experience a woman that likes that as an example right exactly every woman likes that or they see a porn movie and they go that's what i gotta do not necessarily woman is different i mean it's simple just because one woman liked it liked it doesn't mean another one's going to. Right, exactly. You know, so you have to kind of let them tell you what they like or don't like. Either verbally or non-verbally, you know, they're squealing with pleasure. I guess it's all good. In all fairness, if you were someone doing that and you don't like it, you should be there oh come on baby slow down nice and easy nice and slow i try to redirect them yeah well you could tell them don't be ashamed i mean if you know you went and got fucking spiked gloves to jerk their dick off those shows i go fuck no well some might some might really like that but um did they have gloves that have spikes on the inside i don't know i bet you they would i don't know i mean there's so much bdsm stuff that i sit there and scratch my head like what the fuck is that that yeah i would think they probably do interesting to you well i'm not saying i'd be into that but gloves with sandpaper inside oh yeah absolutely helpful for you know a cabinet, but not for... Yeah, I have some chair legs I need to sand. I don't need my dick any less than it was. I've been using these sandpaper gloves. My dick used to be three inches in diameter, down to three quarters of an inch. I thought it felt good when I jerked off, but... Now there's nothing left. Yeah. Call me a toothpick dick. Well, now you have something to add to your book. Fuck you. Anyway, so, but, yeah, and now you got the woman revved up your tick on the G-spot, paying some attention to the clitit now you're going to see her start to really writhe you might see the the stomach arch up and the tits going up too right right you know so now if you can if they're into it is when you want to start adding dirty talk if you if that's part of the wheelhouse depending on the person you're with yeah depending on the person you're with. Yeah, depending on the person you're with. Yeah. But sometimes that's hard because... And if not dirty talk, depending the person you're with, you might want to pull a finger out of your pussy, wet it, and see if she wants it in the tuchus too. Oh, yeah, sometimes I go for that. Sometimes they want you to tickle the tuchus. Right. And, you you know maybe if you can get it going a little anal play sometimes then you can you know give her the peace symbol one in each forget the shocker no one wants the fucking shocker but you could do you know the peace symbol right right yeah one in each hole one in each hole if she's accepting right and then you know she can you know again you could add dirty talk to it if you want you know it's like oh you're such a dirty girl or whatever you know but um yeah i think i think the dirty talk would take it away from me too much for you but some people are into it yeah it's like no i want your mouth on my mom on my pussy know me talking about things i I don't need to tell me any story. How's it feel, baby? Oh, shit. I'm trying to take trash out. Uh-oh. Oh, I'm so turned on now. By the way, did you pay the electric bill? That is dirty talk. Don't let me forget to take the dogs out before i go to sleep
Speaker2: that's dirty too but um filthy dirty yeah so again and you have to look at how much time have you invested into it at this point and how much time do you want to invest into it my opinion is you put as much fucking time into it as the woman wants you to put into it don't try to hurry up just so you can get yours.
Speaker1: Ah, good point. Good point. Yeah, that makes sense. Be self-taught. fucking time into it as the woman wants you to put into it don't try to hurry up just so you can get yours ah good point good point yeah that makes sense let's do be selfless you know what the more you treat the woman like gold it's going to come back to you oh so when are you going to start doing that i'm only giving advice i'd I'd say, too. Okay. Fair enough. Fair enough. And I have to ask you, do we really want to have this conversation? No, we don't. Okay. Just checking. But, yeah, you know, so, I mean, let that woman ride that big hill on the roller coaster for as long as she can. You know what? If you have have the right woman she might be able to go up and down a lot of big hills yeah they do talk about that yeah with multiples if you can do it right i mean i mean you're a witness i've been with women that have never had as many orgasms as i've been able to give them orally yes that's true you know um and it's because you you get them on that ride and they can stay there and if you know now not everyone's tongue can last not everybody's tall enough to get on that ride too okay that would be me yeah but you know like everyone's amazed how long i can go with my tongue and yeah i can't go that long yeah i cannot you know for me 45 minutes is nothing an hour and a half is not too bad no you've done that on me yeah i've done it on others too um but um you know uh but you know work at it yeah i don't think you have a hard time having women let you practice. Probably not. I really need to practice eating pussy. Can you help? Yeah, I think I can, actually. Well, hopefully you can find someone to practice. Yeah, to practice off. Let's see. What else did I say? Listen to her and pay attention to her. Well, we've been pretty much saying that. That's kind of what I'm saying. you pay attention to what's going on with her body how she reacts you'll do one thing in particular you might do one thing that you see her body like or you hear her make a comment or her body twist or all of a sudden you know you start doing something and say she starts grabbing her nipples and pulling them it's like okay she's enjoying what i'm doing right exactly make a note of that don't don't beat that to fucking death back off right go do something else then come back you know yeah that's it's yeah you can't stay in one place too long because it oversaturates it yeah gather all the tools in the toolbox finds out which ones work the best and then work them Not to death But assort them Do 30 seconds of this
Speaker3: 15 seconds Finds out which ones work the best And then work them Not to death But assort them
Speaker2: Do 30 seconds of this 15 seconds of that 10 seconds of this 35 seconds of this Or whatever without timing it
Speaker1: There's a little clock tink
Speaker2: A little timer going off on your phone
Speaker1: Beep Okay switch it up
Speaker2: Time to lick the clit Beep Time to lick the anus I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know.
Speaker4: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know.
Speaker5: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know. I don't know.. Beep. Time to lick the quit. Beep. Time to lick the anus. Beep. Time to lick the taint. The taint. Beep. Twerk nipple. Beep. Quit hood needs attention. Beep. You know, they used to make those little feet you put down to learn the dance moves? Oh, yeah, yeah. They have little tongues. Little tongue stickers to put on. It's like, yeah, quit, hood, one, you know, plung, hole, two, belly button, three, one, two. That might work. That might be kind of fun. Yeah. That's the setup of a great Great sexual event Here honey Let me put these little stickers Around your snatch So I know what I'm doing Little cheat sheets Fun just the right music To coordinate it to Little flash cards Cheap Oh, my God. Coordinated, too? How about flashcards? You can cheat.
Speaker2: Pussy two, three, lick.
Speaker1: F two, three, lick. Oh, yeah, we can ruin just about any erotic interlude here.
Speaker2: So now, if you're lucky enough to get the woman to want to peak in the very beginning or very soon, you have to ask yourself, is she going to be able to do it again? Do it again. So if that's the possibility, you don't need to bring all your tools out right off the bat. If she's willing right away right let her pop if she needs a secondary coop give it to her if she doesn't pull out a different tool do something else yeah it's like oh okay you know she popped over just me you know teasing her right that's great okay well honey there's still more shit to cover
Speaker1: yeah exactly i'm just reading over what they went over they have Blah- to move like if you're teasing yeah oh yeah don't move don't move yeah stay right there no oh no come on go back there there. But whatever it is, and no matter how uncomfortable you may be, as important you keep doing as she is in order to make her actually orgasm with you. Do you ever get uncomfortable? I don't think you really notice it until the next day. I got five torn ligaments in my neck. Well, that I know. So there's a point. And I have a bad back. So depending on where I'm at, what position I'm in. Exactly. Yeah. I mean, there's, you know, most women don't know it, but like at the parties. Right. You know, I was, after 45 minutes, I was in severe pain between my neck and my back. And then the next day from next day next day my back was completely fucked but i wonder if they have like a pussy eating like chair that you could instead of like because you're like laying on your stomach so your neck is like hyper extended well i could get a barber chair and put stirrups put stirrups in it yeah that would be good massage table with stirrups. Yeah, that would be good. Well, the massage table with stirrups would be. Yeah, that would be bad. Because then you could just sit there. Massage table and get those, like the bondage stirrups. Yeah, yeah. To the ceiling, that'd be, you know. Oh, that wouldn't be bad. I could just get a little, like a little milk stool. A little stool, a little, or stool with rollers. A little drip bucket to get all the juices that she's. A drip bucket. Yeah, throw it down. See, that's the thing thing we didn't talk about is how great that all gets when a woman's a squirter. Oh, my God. Yeah, they didn't go over that. Now it's a whole new level of commitment. Right. Because now everything is slippery. You're doused. Oh, my God. So it's a little bit more, you know, you got to learn how to keep licking while you have fluid going down your throat. Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah. The only person I, to some women it's like running into a garden hose. Yeah. You know? Yeah. So it's, I mean, it's, it just excites me more. Yeah. Oh God. Yeah. I can understand that. I can understand that. That's, that's for sure. So it's going to be even more slippery. You're going to have all these fluids all over the place and you have to just keep, you know, keep focused. I want to keep going. Yeah. But now, like, your finger stuff. Okay, the finger tricks work great when they're squirting, because that helps them squirt. Oh, okay. But now it gets so goddamn slippery in there. Yeah. You know, you have to kind of almost apply more pressure, because now it's just like, whoop it's just all slippery. Oh my word, yeah. I didn't think about that.
Speaker2: Yeah, it's, yeah.
Speaker1: Makes sense.
Speaker2: Now, the one part that's not part of this is you're playing with someone whoever they may be.
Speaker1: I'm not trying to name anybody. I'm not going to name anybody i'm not going to name anybody i'm just saying but sometimes farts happen oh yeah yes we're all human okay sometimes women are having so much pleasure and they're grunting from coming or almost coming and stuff like that that a woman could fart in your mouth oh yeah i've done that if you're a man just keep fucking going man the fuck up just keep going show her you're in there for the game baby this is why you're a starter you're not fucking third you're not fucking you know third team no man you're fucking varsity you're fucking in there you know well and the same is too if she wasn't expecting anal and you put your finger in there, you might be tickling the tip of a turd. Don't fucking get all gross. Ew. Dude, play it cool. Just tickle the turd. Tickle the turd. And be aware, when you pull your finger out, it might have a little Hershey kiss on it. It might. Okay? Do not, do not put that finger in the other hole. Yes, do not do that. You don't want the woman getting ill. Yeah, exactly. Getting an infection or anything else. You know, no more than you're going to sit there and brush your teeth with that finger. No. You know? Just put it off the side. Okay, cool. If you get to a situation where you're not happy, like, okay, she farted, okay, whatever. Well, you know. Switch a position you might want to you might want to just like you know back off a little just kiss her thighs and hopefully she's come already right you haven't gotten her to come now you're gonna you're not gonna embarrass her right right don't embarrass her let her know man you're there well here the thing with the whole farting thing i know when i've farted in your face a few times a few times it's like you're bearing down because i want my my pussy to reach out even more so i'm bearing down and in all fairness every one of those was more air than it was oh yeah there's no smell to it so that's not so bad i can deal with that he's gagging you believe me shut the fuck up
Speaker2: i had to shave the rest of my beard so the rest could grow back in he comes up and all the hair's like singed okay the three stooges you know the bomb goes off yeah there's her eyes you can see their eyes everything else is black no i mean it's like come on man it's and we're all human you know just fucking man up no I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker2: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't know.
Speaker1: I don't know.
Speaker5: I don't know.
Speaker3: I don't want to leave that go. And'm really, I'm anal about anal prep. I am.
Speaker1: I don't want to leave that go.
Speaker2: And by that, do you mean you take mints after you eat the guy's ass?
Speaker1: I do it before. That little zing. Whoa, what's going on?
Speaker2: I put a Mentos in his ass to see if he exploded.
Speaker1: I put Diet Coke and a Mentos in his ass to clean them out that's all it would it would yeah that might work i don't want to know i don't want to know i don't even want to be there i could be dangerous do not try this do not do that's not good i don't know what would happen but well you got something that can go in either direction so you could fuck somebody up oh no kidding yeah i guess a coke bottle when they put a mento in a coke bottle it's only got one opening right you put a mentos and coke in someone's ass it's got two directions one could kill the person yeah that's true do not ever do that probably would not be a good thing to do but you're sure it's funny to think about i'm not gonna say it's not not humorous it is humorous come on just don't do it we do not recommend this we don't encourage you we're sorry we even brought it up aren't you ashamed of yourself now no it's funny it's my job let me see do they go over anything else we can't go over anymore your knees can't get any closer oh my god better have some fresh batteries for you tonight i'll just put some in i'll just charge up my toys get some peanut butter out of the show yeah they do they do recommend like if if the woman's able to have several orgasms you know after doing this you know you can you want to be a hero man you drain her of every orgasm she has yeah you will be the hero i know you know weak need and i know for a fact we've talked about my experiences with that where there's six women sitting at a table look like they Yep. All of them. All of them had over 30 orgasms each inside of half an hour. Or more. It was crazy. I'm averaging it out. But yeah. And they were all like, you know, basically want to haul me into town on their backs. I don't think they could. They couldn't climb the steps. Not afterwards, maybe before. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah, to help them up the stairs, for God's sake. Oh, they're upstairs, like, uh. So, anyway, that's. Yeah. So, I'm right on target with that article I had to say about. Yeah, I'm surprised. It's like they didn't, you added more stuff to it. But, yeah, that was pretty good. You know, sometimes they, you know, they don't think of't think of everything but no that was pretty good
Speaker2: well i expanded upon it yeah if i wrote the article that would not just be an article it'd
Speaker1: be a fucking book book a pamphlet well actually you know start slow don't hit the clit right away lots of teasing lots and lots of teasing listen to the podcast again yeah i just we did one i
Speaker2: tried to do one show where i talked about the secrets and i think i was too inebriated so
Speaker1: Thank you. and lots of teasing. Let's listen to the podcast again. Yeah. We did one, I tried to do one show where I talked about the secrets and I think I was too inebriated, so. Oh. It happens occasionally. Occasionally. Oh my God. More often than not. Not so much anymore. Yeah, we're maturing. No, we're not. You might be. I am. I'm very responsible. I have a Wayne's jokes. I'm not mature. Some of them I just don't get. Well, that's that dad joke thing. Dad jokes. I'm the one she sends me. Okay. She sends me jokes too all the time. The dad jokes. Someone's like, what? I don't get it. This is not funny. They're dad jokes. That's what makes them dad jokes. Maybe we're just not intelligent enough to understand them. Maybe. So anyway, I want to thank everyone for listening. Yeah, go home and try this out on your friend and see how this works. Maybe come back and tell us if it works or it doesn't work, or maybe come up with some new techniques.
Speaker2: Yeah, if you have something else that works, send me the information. I'll let you know. Info at hotwifepodcast.com.
Speaker1: Always looking for new things.
Speaker3: All right, everybody, have a great night.