Overwhelmed Newbee

Amber, also consider not having a profile pic displayed. Might decrease the random guys who are just reaching out to drool over pics. Have patience, there are good people here!

Wow, wish I had that problem, a lot of people put 18-99 but clearly after probably 60 or so nobody is interested,

Thank you everyone. Still overwhelmed but it's getting easier. I'm only down to 379 unread messages. On a positive note a couple of the guys seem cool. Time will tell ....

Welcome to the forum MedicAmber. Wayne will possibly correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe if you set your preferences (Edit Profile > Preferences) to "No interest" for all, you can still see and respond to the people that wrote you, but nobody new can write to you.

The problem is you show no interest in anyone but SMs, and that is by far the largest group on this site and the group most likely to overwhelm you.

Use Block for the ones that are obvious No's, and for the ones of interest, you can go to their profile and add a Note. You may want to consider toggling the Preferences on/off till things calm down a little.

You can also of course use the Search feature to look for profiles of interest. As was mentioned, you can just cut through all of the BS and attend LS events and meet people in person too.

For guys that are a ridiculaous distance away, you may want to consider jut blocking them, but your call.

For Amber, I feel your pain and as the prior replies say; BLOCK THE FOOL (In my Mr. T voice). I moved to FL and my first day I had over 100 messages. If no face pic, no name, and nothing intelligent to write I block them. I prefer to find the male.

Welcome OP.. we too have used the block feature when it becomes overwhelming with those who DO NOT READ what we have written.. since we opened it back up to single males just this week.. and its only Tuesday..we have had multiple guys this week sending friend requests, dick photos with want to meet, etc etc..we now delete and or block those people who cannot or do not read what we have in our profile..

"We" use SLS to keep in touch with old FWB, events clubs and events..

It does get old with all those who do not read.. no photos, and bad attitudes.. The good ones are definitely keepers and we thank them!

Amber, welcome to the site. When you set your toggles to block certain people it will keep you from being able to see the profile. Just liberally make use of the block function for ones you aren't interested in. People get upset if you don't say something back. However, the reality is that this isn't going to be your second job.

With the couples profile that turns into a blue gumby, it's just one of the quirks of the site.

Some people do in fact read the profiles. Since the site expanded to the app it has resulted in more messages from people who only see pictures. You can expect virtually every single male in the area to send you a message and a ton of the couples. As mentioned, use the block feature. Now, if you do want to take your time to respond then just do a few a day and don't feel rushed at all.

The huge thing to do is screen anyone that you're going to think about meeting. The video chat function here is a good first step in verifying they are who they say they are. It is common for pictures to be 10+ years old. More than once we have struggled to recognize people from the site at parties. Once you find some good possibilities, be safe and meet everyone in public first. You may even want to insist on meeting people at a local club or LS party. Clubs and parties give you the added advantage of seeing real people with the headaches of the online silliness.

Oh, one other suggestion. Consider blocking everyone, or changing your settings to have no interest in anyone (I’m not positive that you can do that).

If you can do that, it’ll stop people from contacting you. That’ll give you some breathing room to peruse profiles at your leisure, and when you are ready you can reach out to profiles which interest you.

Totally normal. I just helped a friend set up her profile. She’s of a similar age and situation as you. Within minutes of posting pictures she was getting random and inappropriate messages.

Try posting some questions and concerns in the Women Talk section. There are some helpful and experienced single women who can help you navigate this site and lifestyle. Good luck.

Question from a single woman's point of view .... WOW. I'm New after being referred by a friend to this site. After clearing my messages last night for a total of 117 I woke to over 200 New messages and so many friend requests.

Is this normal? What blows me away is they are from all over, most have no pictures. Something else I've noticed is the message shows as a couple but when I open the message it's a blue single guy. Do people read profiles? I'm sorry for blowing off steam but I'm just overwhelmed.