Keeping up with the Joneses This month we skip out of a marriage conference early to attend a swinger lifestyle meet and greet. Are we bad? We also talk about a local date for dinner. Discussion topic We've both read the book and seen the movie and share our thoughts on how we view the story and how it relates to our lifestyle journey. Snapshots Mrs Jones finds herself the center of attention at an "over 45" meet and greet and Mr Jones shares a sexy story of how Mrs Jones fulfills one of his fantasies by dressing the part of the "female CEO"!
Transcript
This podcast contains explicit language and content and is for mature audiences only. If you're under 18, this show is more for your parents. Ew! So, now that you have that mental image stuck in your head, put some music on and get back to doing your homework. We are a long-time married couple who's decided to chronicle our personal adventures and share our sex-positive discussions as we navigate our way through the swinging lifestyle. Care to join us?
Welcome to episode number seven of the We Got a thing podcast i'm mr jones and i'm mrs jones and it's a friday night march 20th we just got home from our wild and crazy friday night date we went to costco grocery shopping and then but then we went out to uh dinner at a really cool brewery and and recovered with a nice uh vanilla porter and um some yummy french fries and sandwiches you know i think we had some foreplay at the at the costco because we were going down the aisle where the dish detergent is and you said do we need dish detergent because i'm the one one that does the dishes.
And you said, do we need dish detergent? And I said, yeah. And you said something about what kind. And I said, well, we need to get Dawn. And you said, well, it's twice as much. And I said, I'm not going to use anything but Dawn dishwashing liquid. And I think you got a little charge out of that. I like it when you take a stand. I'm going to take control guy when it comes to doing the dishes. Yes, you are. You have a method. Yeah. So we survived another evening at Costco and had a good evening and decided we would podcast tonight. And do you know what today is, Mr. Jones? It's Friday.
It is March 20th. And you know what that means? It's the first day of spring it is the first day of spring although you wouldn't know because it's cold or rainy outside it is exactly three months until we leave for desire oh that's why you have the desire shirt yes okay i thought that was just kind of a coincidence an added bonus ah thank you for noticing yeah so if you go to our website and look at the pictures, Mrs. Jones is wearing the same shirt tonight that she had on there. The Desire Riviera Maya souvenir that we got last August, I believe, when we were there. So I'm ready.
I just need a little bit of a tan. Yeah, you're a little bit pale. I know. But the headphones kind of make up for the costumes. Yeah, the headphones are sexy, I'm sure. Right. So it's good. Thank you for coming back to another episode. And tonight we're going to, in our segment number one of Keeping Up with the Joneses, we've been quite busy. We have. In the lifestyle the past few weeks. Yeah, we've been getting out and about. I feel like we're kind of, you know, getting our mojo back.
Well, we've come out of hibernation i mean it's been a rough winter yeah it has been kind of nice and in this part of the country a little bit warm and we know that the daylight well the clocks changed and so that always helps it does i like it when it's light at night yeah so the first thing that we did was we went to a meet and greet in in the northern Virginia suburburb and this was a big one yeah there were like 250 people there i think right and we had not been to this meet and greet before and we had reached out to a couple on sls i believe right and they said something about they were going to go to this meet and greet so we decided that we would go and it was it was really kind of a nice facility and the logistics and everything getting there and where it was was okay but there was a lot of people there like you said probably what a couple hundred people at least i think like over 200 people at rsvp and i mean that place was packed right and for context this is really only the second meet and greet we've ever been to right because the first one was a lot smaller.
It was a girls on court meet and greet and there were only probably maybe like 12 couples there. Right so this is completely different dynamic. Saturday night 250 people you know the room was small and there were pool tables in the middle and the traffic flow was a little bit awkward. It was, I guess it wasn't too loud because the band or the music was coming from the room next door. Right. Yeah. The dance floor was in a completely separate area. Right. But, um, I was a little bit overwhelmed just by all of that. We finally made our way to the bar and got something to drink.
And that always helps. It does. And we ran into a couple that we know at the bar, which was fun. Yes. We got to catch up with them for a while. Um, and then we met the couple that we had, um, kind of reached out to on SLS and spent some time talking to them, but you know, they were, they were mingling and talking with other people too. So it was, um, an environment that, I mean, I'm, my personality is I'm, I'm kind of, um, I don't know what's the right word. I'm more withdrawn, I guess, when you get into a situation. Not withdrawn, but reserved. You're in a large crowd. Yeah. Right.
And so we tried to kind of mingle and move around and it seemed like i mean i don't want to like over assess this but it seemed like there were lots of groups of people who already knew each other yeah i think there were and i think because we didn't get there very late but i think most people had already arrived by the time we got there i think we got there around nine and i think it started at eight right but the first meet and greet that we went to the girls on cork of course it was much smaller but when we got there the host and hostess greeted us and introduced themselves they did a fantastic job and they kind of took us around the room and introduced us to to those that have been there before and i thought that was i mean that's just what i needed because you know then people want to you, they know who you are.
And it kind of does a good job of breaking up conversations and clicks that might be kind of starting. But this one was so large, I'm not sure that the host, you know, would have had an opportunity to do that. No. And there were no name tags.
So, you know, you couldn't really just walk up and say, hey there, you know, whoever, and just start striking up a conversation conversation right so but we we did run into you know the couple that we had arranged to meet and and that was fun getting to talk to them and and then they knew some people that were there so we got to meet them and and talk with them and and we reconnected with a couple that we have uh spent time with before and that was kind of fun one interesting note about them um they are one of the couples that we have gotten to know that have a no kissing rule and as we were talking to them they um have decided that the no kissing rule doesn't apply for them anymore so we were like yay do you want to get together again right and they listen to the podcast yeah so we were a little bit concerned that you know they might have taken that the wrong way but they seem to take it in the right spirit yeah so so anyway they don't have a no kissing rule no they don't and um it was just so much fun catching up with them and it you know it was kind of loud to kind of have that that intimate conversation where you could really catch up with stuff so we're looking forward to uh arranging to get together with them in an environment where we can actually talk and spend time together.
So as far as our things that we have, I'm not sure that a meet and greet of that size, I mean, we'll probably go back just to give it another chance and to get to know people. But I don't think that's really our most comfortable venue as far as interacting with people and really getting to know them. Right. And then another interesting thing that happened was we met another couple that actually knew us from our podcast. Yes, they were at that meet and greet. And that was very flattering. It felt very odd.
I didn't really know how to respond because it's never happened to us before, but a couple was really, really friendly and really nice and gorgeous. Yeah. And, and they had made a comment. I think they had made a comment on our, we got a thing page or, so I knew that they had, I knew who they were.
Um, and then when i said something about podcast he he got this big grin on his face and uh it was it was very flattering and very complimentary and made me think that you know maybe we need maybe we're doing this all wrong maybe we need to let this podcast do the work for us yeah really yeah so that and that that was a a lot of fun. And they're a really cute couple, and it was really kind of good to see them as well. So hello to you guys. I know that you're listening. Didn't want to mention your names, but anyway, thanks for that. We enjoyed it.
We appreciate that, and we look forward to seeing you guys again soon. Yeah, definitely. So was there anything else on that meet and greet? No, I think that's it. I think we'll give it another try. You know, I think kind of practice makes perfect. Mr. Jones and I did have a little bit of a, um, it wasn't a fight and it wasn't an argument, but we had kind of a different methodology for work in the room. Um, Mr.
Jones, when he gets in a large crowd like that and it's loud and it's hard to move around and stuff, he likes to like pick a spot, not necessarily in the corner, but kind of on the perimeter a little bit. And he likes to just stand and observe and try to kind of look around to find a couple that he finds intriguing that he might want to try to go up and talk to. I like to keep moving because I feel really uncomfortable when I stand still.
I feel, I don't know if I feel like a wallflower I don't know what I feel like but it makes me feel uncomfortable so I said something to him we were standing there and he was doing his assessment but when he does it he gets really quiet so I don't know what he's thinking okay if you're gonna if you're gonna tell this story., you got to start from the beginning. I think I did start from the beginning, honey. Oh, here we go. No, you didn't start from the beginning. Okay.
So we were moving from the bar back into the room and I said, okay, well, let's go see if we can find somebody to talk to, or you might've said that. And then I, you said, well, I want you to try to find somebody. And when you said that, I felt like all the pressure was on me. And then what happens was, you're right, then what I do is I kind of stop. And I just like watching people. I like observing, you know, the conversations and which people might tend to be more open to somebody kind of walking.
So I'm looking, I'm doing this assessment and I can tell that you're getting a little bit uncomfortable because we're just standing there and I'm not talking to you at that point in time. I'm kind of just assessing the room. Right. Okay. So I just kind of felt like I was left hanging, so to speak. Right. And, and I did, I did ask Mr.
Jones to pick up a couple and it all goes back to um the last last podcast when we were talking about you know soft swap full swap and i wanted to see him find somebody that he could just kind of lose himself in i just really want him to find that couple where he finds the woman really really intriguing so i'm not on you. But that's why I said that. It wasn't like I wasn't going to be satisfied until you found that person, but I don't want it to always be me picking out a couple to talk to. So I didn't understand that I put undue pressure on you. It wasn't intended to be that way. Well, right.
Can you tell we had a little bit of strife over this well i mean overall with the people that we did talk to and the couple that we met for the first time that i think we're going to try to go out with in the future i mean overall we we did meet people we did and we had a fair time but when we got in the car to come home it was kind of quiet there for a while until we finally worked through that little bit of awkwardness. But, you know, and again, you know, we don't really find ourselves in this situation because we've been together for 30 years.
So I'm, you know, we're dating as a couple instead of individuals. With two different personalities. Yeah. Good grief. Right. All right. Well, let's move on. Yeah, we better move on. Okay. So last time we podcasted, I had just texted another couple, and I think I mentioned it while we were recording, that I just reached out to a couple that we have been with in the past and tried to reconnect with them. And they finally got back with us, and we had dinner with them about a week ago, right? Yes. Yeah. So that was really fun to catch up with them. We hadn't seen them since November. Right.
And they're just as adorable as they were. And we actually spilled the beans to them that we have a podcast. This is really awkward trying to figure out, do we tell people? Do we not tell people? We don't want to keep it a big, dirty secret. Yeah, and they were really excited about it. Yeah, they were.
And were and they even said well you can say our names if you want to yeah they did we still won't do that no but you had a good idea you said maybe well the four of us will podcast together because um he told us that she was a radio personality yes when she in her in school or i can't remember where it was now yeah i think it was when she was in school and you can tell she is just an extremely articulate person yeah um all of her enunciation is perfect and um yeah so she could probably give us some lessons yeah but what yeah i said something about doing a podcast together and you said yeah we could all do it from the bed i know that's.
Yeah. Who's going to hold the microphone? So we had a blast and they're talking about having another, um, small house party maybe next month. So we're hoping to, uh, be invited to that hint, hint if you're listening. And what I liked about that evening was even though we had not seen them since we started the podcast, probably November or October, it was like we just picked right up where we left off. And these are the types of kind of relationships we're building in the lifestyle. People are just genuine, they're warm. You know about them and they know about you.
And so, you know, it was really just a very comfortable and a fun and a fun evening so looking forward to seeing them outside the restaurant maybe next time yeah they had done some fun stuff they uh ended up going to europe on uh on travel for for his business and um and she got to go with him and they ended up with a little bit of downtime and they went to amsterdam and and went to oh that's right they went to a couple sex clubs in amsterdam and the stories they told were just intriguing and hilarious well you know what we should save that because i know i like the story that they told about what they did with tinder as well yeah that's true so we'll save that yeah they might want to tell that story they're a very cool couple yeah very adventurous yeah it was very fun listening to them.
So that was the second thing that we did. What else do we need to share about keeping up with the Joneses? Well, we went to a vanilla marriage conference last weekend with three other couples, actually with Mr. Jones's brother and his wife and two other couples that we're friends with, and a good weekend. Mr. Jones and I had been to it a couple of times before, but the last time we went to it was like 10 years ago. Yeah. Like I told the lady, she keeps bringing me back because I can't figure it out. I know. Keep hoping he'll get it right.
But anyway, it was very fun because the other three couples we were with had never been before. And it was just a good, relaxing weekend. And it's a marriage conference designed to make healthy marriages stronger and better. It's not to fix problems or anything like that. So it's very lighthearted. And at the same time, they really focus on communication and looking inside of yourself to make sure that I guess your motives are pure and that you're really, um, dedicated to your marriage. Yeah.
And we'll talk more about that at the end of the show because we're going to try to weave that into a future episode. So that was a very, very vanilla event and it ended on Sunday at noon.
So we actually snuck out like 15 minutes early because we had to get to a swinger meet and greet after that yeah i'm starting to learn that these meet and greets take they're all shapes forms and sizes and locations and and personalities i i and so we keep getting invited to these meet and greets and this one happened to be very unique and it was at a winery and it's at a winery like i mean it's like a wine club meet swinger meet and greet group right and and it was at a winery, and it's at a winery like, I meant like. It's like a wine club meet, swinger meet and greet group.
Right, and it was only 20 minutes from home, so we said, well, we can't pass this up. And it's a winery that we go to all the time. Right, and so we just, and it was for people over 40, right? It was, it was, yeah, they only invite people, it was through SLS, right? Yes. So that I guess somehow they found our profile and they only invite you if you're both over 40. Right. So it's a grown up meet and greet. We barely qualify. Yeah, right. Yeah, so we rushed out of the, we left our friends and said, bye, we'll see you. We're on our way to, well, we didn't say that.
that no we just said we're sneaking out early to beat the traffic yeah we went to the winery and and we were kind of a little bit we were curious to know whether i mean because this winery has a really really big tasting room but off to the side there's a smaller room which is where this group was going to be and we go there frequently so we thought we might see people in the main tasting. And a lot of my work friends go there a lot and they go often. So I was so afraid I was going to walk in there and there's going to be all my coworkers. Right. So we had our trench coats and sunglasses.
Yeah. We walked in and the coast was clear. Um, so we, we had a good time. This, this was, um, this type of atmosphere was much more what I'm comfortable with. Yes. Again, there were what about 20 couples? Yeah, I think so. Right. It was, it was just right for me. And as soon as we walked in, there was a little bit of awkwardness because no one knew us. And so when we drifted, we were, we were late. Yeah, we were.
And when we got into that room, they kind of looked at us like us like okay i wonder if these people know what they're walking into and i don't recall how the conversation went but well finally the host said um so do you have a what's your screen name so he was talking about our sls screen name so you know then we said something about sls and he said okay you, you're in the right place. Oh, okay. Right. Yeah. And so we, we talked to just about everybody there.
We were there for a few hours and, um, you know, drinking wine and, and mingling and, you know, that, that type of room that there was music in the next room, but it was acoustic music and it was, it was kind of soft and it was a beautiful day. Yeah. I thought the setting was perfect. Some of the, um, some of the people had brought food, so they had a table with snacks out there. And then of course, you know, you could buy a bottle of wine and, um, and the host and hostess did a really good job of making sure that we got around it.
And the, and the people were actually really good about, you know, coming over and saying, I haven't met you yet. You know, I'm so and so. And, and it just was really nice. Very, very comfortable. Right. And let me see. We'll probably, what about that one? Well, you know, I don't know how to say this because I want to be honest, but I also want to be respectful. I mean, at our age, what we find is that it takes a lot of work to try to stay in condition, you know? Yes.
And being at our age, what we find is that it takes a lot of work to try to stay in condition, you know, and being at our age, you know, and we run and we work out and we try to, you know, do what we can to, you know, to, to stay fit.
Um, but when you have a crowd that's over 40, you know, you find more people that really, and, and they're, and they're still wonderful people and they and they interact with each other but i think it's harder for us to find people not that we want to talk to and get to know but probably play with just because of kind of how we approach that that part of right right so anyway well one really um interesting thing is So I was talking to this one guy. Actually, we saw this couple kind of over.
There was like a little wicker sofa and chair arrangement, you know, kind of away from the table where all the food was, where a lot of the people were mingling. So we decided to go over and introduce ourselves to them.
Well weren't married it was his it was the guy was there with his wife but she was in another group of people talking now let me tell you something that you don't know what and this is going to go back to the first story of the first meet and greet so i was observing the room okay and i saw them sitting on the sofa and i knew they weren't together oh really because her she was turned and facing towards him and she was leaning You're right. And I saw them sitting on the sofa and I knew they weren't together because she was turned and facing towards him and she was leaning away from him.
And I could tell by the way they were talking to each other that they were not husband and wife. So when I went over there, I already had figured that out. And see, that's the way that I kind of assess what's going on.
And just so happens you were in another conversation and you weren't standing next to me kind of waiting for that to happen but well good for you see that's why we're a good team yeah so you you analyze the situation and i just stand there and yap with people and we did go over and talk with we did with them and um and she um i mean we'll talk more more about this later maybe, but she was a very fascinating person and Mr. Jones was very intrigued. I was really intrigued with her.
I mean, we, we talked a lot about, um, the same things, the fundamental kind of things in life that we had both kind of shared and been through together.
And, um, she had a lot of courage because she was there by herself oh that's right and her husband was out of town and she said well you know i asked him if it was okay you know if i went and he said sure go ahead and go and i said well gosh and she had never been before this was her first time i said wow that takes a lot of courage and she said well everybody keeps telling me that but i don't think it's that you know big of a deal so she was very very comfortable she said well what's the worst thing that can happen i'm in a winery you know it's a public place right and they did a really good job of advertising that this was a vanilla venue and that we were all to be on our best behavior you know and and people were so she said you know i didn't really feel like i was going to be molested or anything.
They said the worst thing that could happen is I decided this place wasn't for me and I could enjoy my glass of wine and come home. Right. And I, and I would say, well, first of all, she's very attractive, but secondly, I would say that that was the most, that was the most engaging conversation that I've had with anybody that I've met for the first time in the lifestyle.
i i was very it was interesting watching you with her it i really enjoyed it it was good so the story i'm gonna tell isn't it's much more frivolous than that so the guy that she was sitting on the couch with was married and his wife happened to be chatting with somebody else at the time and i hadn't made the connection because i'm not the analytical person that you are so i started talking with him while you were talking with the the other lady and he and his wife are nudists and they like to go to club orient and well they've been to desire a lot yeah and but he was telling me about you know club orient because you know we've never been there where we enjoy the clothing optional aspect of desire we've been there well we we've been there on cruise ship stopovers right we've been to that beach right we've been to orient we're the textiles i know we're the textiles that's the story i'm getting ready to tell sorry so they actually stay at club orient because they're nudists so mr jones and i when we cruise a lot of times a cruise ship will stop at st martin for the day and we'll hop in a taxi and go over to orient beach because it is beautiful beautiful beach and you can go topless and i can go topless ding yeah and then we can walk over to club orient and we can look at all the naked people or Or for $5, you can get your picture taken with that well-hung guy that hangs out there on the rocks right between the resort and the rest of the beach.
I don't think that thing was real. I didn't see a strap-on or anything, honey. I don't know. Maybe he had like an implant or something. Sorry to interrupt your story. It was very stallion-ish. Are you going to tell that part of it now? Okay. Well, so yeah. You're not going to let me tell my story in order, are you? Oh, no. Go ahead. If you're going to get to that. Well, I wasn't going to get to that. No, you will. Then you need to tell that part of it. So we were there one other time and we were just getting out of a taxi, right?
We had just gotten just gotten there i think we went for a walk on the beach okay and we were we were in the section that we were in that orient beach where you rent chairs and you can go topless if you want to right it's where all the obnoxious cruise ship people yeah and then you walk down to the edge and then there's a yellow flag where you go into club orient property right and at that point in time it's clothing optional right well no club orient is nudist they don't wear clothes at all it's a public beach still so yeah so we can walk down that way so there's like these huge huge boulders separating the rest of the beach from the private property of club orient right so standing on the boulders is this naked guy and which is okay i mean there's a lot of naked people yeah so he was offering his service of you getting your picture taken with him for five dollars but he was like the most ridiculously hung man i've ever seen it was to his knees it was it was yeah it was just like it was swing like a pendulum when he would walk i think i don't know it looked like he beat it with a hammer or something it looks swollen but i really didn't he was making money because the ladies would go up to him giggling and and get a picture taken and they were giving him tips so he didn't have to do anything but just stand yeah anyway okay so anyway so this gentleman at the winery that i was talking to he and his wife vacation there because they're nudists so they have they and a lot of times they go there july 4th well one time we were there july 4th it just so happened to be july 4th when the cruise ship stopped at st martin and there was a fourth of july parade from club orient all the the naked people at club orient had body painted themselves and had on like superman capes and and they were throwing like red silver and blue mardi gras beads and they did a parade up and down the beach and it was hilarious yeah it was very entertaining i mean they and it was amazing the body paint was amazing i think that's the first time i'd ever really seen body paint on a completely nude person and it it was really impressive well and they were just having a good time because they knew that they were shocking like 95 of the people on the beach well they had jewelry on yeah they they were well adorned yes because this was we saw piercings everywhere the guy had a piercing through the end of his dick and it and he looked like a hammerhead shark i mean it just went in one side and came out the other side i don't as soon as i saw that made me wince but they were very entertaining and they they had a lot of fun.
Well, go ahead. So this couple, the gentleman that I was talking to at the winery, he and his wife were in that parade. He said, what year was it? I said, 2006. And he said, we were there in 2006. He said, we were in the parade. He said, oh yeah, I forget the guy's name. He does all the body paint. You know, he said, we spend hours getting ready for the parade. And, you know, we throw the beads. And I said, oh, my gosh, we saw you. What was he dressed up as, did he say? I don't remember. Yeah. So anyway, they were in the parade. We've seen them before. Yeah. That was pretty fun. Yeah.
And he called us textiles. Yes. He said, oh, you were the textiles because you were the people from the cruise ship that have bathing suits on. So so that so now you know what to call yourself whether you're the nudist or you're the textile yeah yeah that was really strange 2006 in saint martin in that parade and he was he and his wife were in it yeah he said they're there almost every year yeah we like we met a lot of interesting people and you know the great great thing about the lifestyle is people have so many really interesting stories. I know. Yeah. So anyway, we were glad that we went.
It was, it was really late back afternoon and we enjoyed meeting people. And I think they do them like monthly and they try to get to different wineries around the state. So that'll be fun to continue to do that and get to know them better.
Okay, so segment two, the title of our podcast this month is called everybody is 50 shades of something you know we said we were going to talk about 50 shades of gray so you know what do we how do we want to put a slant on this because it's been analyzed by so many different groups of people and most people are very very critical of it so mr jones and i kind of just want to talk about it from our perspective and and how um how we have read the books and seen the movie and and kind of just our opinions on them and and um how 50 shades in one form or another has and you know either contributed to our relationship or enhanced it or, or whatever.
But you know, to start out, everybody is 50 shades of something. Okay, we all know Christian Gray was 50 shades of fucked up. That poor guy was a mess. And that's a shame, because I think that's part of the reason people are criticizing it so much. You know, they think that he wasn't mentally healthy. So therefore he was abusive.
Um was abusive um yeah he was he wasn't really mentally healthy at the beginning of the story and and unfortunately you know people that have only seen the movie or only read the first book don't really know the whole picture right and i think i think the way that you and i enjoy books and movies is that there are so many people observing it from the outside looking in as far as it's a body of work.
It's a, it's a book or it's a movie or it's acting or it's, you know, or it's BDSM or it's abuse and, and looking at it from the outside in, it's easy to pick that apart, but we kind of go into, we just want to, we just want to, um, okay, first of all, I just wanted a sexy beach read for the summer. I mean, we put ourselves, we kind of just go with the story. I mean, that's the author. This was her story. She chose to write it that way.
And so we like to talk more about come from inside the story and out and talk about understanding the people and why that they are the way that they are and try to, you know, kind of relate to the actual story instead of picking it apart from the outside. So, so we, um, so I read the books, um, of course, cause all my girlfriends were reading them and that was like the topic of conversation. I think it was like three summers ago. It's been a long time.
Um, so I, I've of course sucked all three of them down really quick because it was summertime and we were at the beach a lot and you know what else are you going to do when you're at the beach so you remember we'd walk up and down the beach yeah and and this was before kindles were very popular and so you almost you every you could see so many women holding their copy of 50 shades of gray of Grey. I mean, it was like every fourth or fifth beach chair, there was somebody reading it. Right, right, and one of the three books, definitely, they were reading it.
I had a Kindle, and then that was when you bought your Kindle, because I talked you into reading them. I bought it on that trip. Yeah, you did. We went to Costco. Costco comes in so handy. So, um, I, I talked to Mr. Jones and read him cause I'm like, you know, you might not like the storyline, but the sex is like, you know, pretty hot. So yeah. Okay. If you insist, I'll read them. So then he did. And then I reread them again. So we were kind of reading them. No, you teased me about it. You suckered me into it.
You said, there's some really good sex in here, and if you read these, you and I can talk about that. I did, and I meant it. I know, but you meant the whole book. Oh, well, I mean. I only heard sex. I'm like, we're going to talk about different ways to do sex. I'm in. I didn't really know anything more about the book. But we did talk about the sex, too. We did. So anyway, I went back and read them, Thank you.
different ways to do sex i'm in i i didn't really know anything more but we did talk about the sex too we did so anyway i i went back and read them so we were kind of reading them concurrently i reread them while he was reading them and that was a really fun summer um we and we did talk about the sex a lot and and that was a um kind of a another step for us you know we we had talked about, you know, I read a book on blowjobs and then we talked about blowjobs before that, or, you know, we would read books on specific things, but just to read like an erotic story and talk about the sex they had.
And, and especially because a lot of the sex was, you know, BDSM type sex, we hadn't really talked about that. We didn't even know what BDSM was then. We knew what bondage was. Right. So it was, it was. No, he had a lot of toys. I didn't know what they were. I think I had to Google some of this stuff. Yeah. That's what he had her do. If you don't know what it is, Google it. I know. So that, you know, that was, that was kind of fun for us.
So, um, you know, then when the movie, when they don't want, when it was announced that they were going to do a movie, then it became all stirred back up again. Cause you know, everybody had pretty much read the books by then and, and it had kind of died down, but then it got all stirred back up. Well, um, at our church, our pastor, when the books were popular, he came out and said that, you know, you, you shouldn't read the books because there, you know, there's nothing healthy in those books for you to read. And there's plenty of other good books to read.
And he basically just told us not to read the books. Well, he, he told all the, we have a small group of couples that we, we meet together and we study either the bible or you know just different topics in christianity and all of us ladies looked at each other and we were like he was too late we already read him yeah yeah well i mean he was not only said he not only did he say that from the pulpit but you know he wrote a blog about it he's like on fire about it he's about it. And he's mentioned it a few times. But he hasn't read the books. Right.
And that's kind of what I struggle with because I feel like he's uninformed. And that really has been the catalyst for me to be on this Fifty Shades rant. If you want to criticize it, you need to be informed about it. And, and then of course, when the movie came out, you know, he got on the same rant again about don't go see the movie and, you know, just going on and on and on about it. And then again, another blog about it and, and a mass emails of the whole congregation.
And, and, you know, and he admits he hasn't read the books, but it's about women being abused and dominated and all this stuff that he just doesn't, I guess, have experience with. Right, and we didn't see her that way in the book. We talked about how it's a love story. And yes, he's fucked up, says. And, and that's why, and I give you credit for this title because everybody is 50 shades of something. So with, you know, nobody's perfect.
Everybody is formed by these things in your, your childhood and, and where you went to school and who raised you and whether you were in a church or, or not a single parent family, what all of these things make up who you are. And so no one, no one has a, you know, a perfect pattern for that. And so we looked at it as, you know, here's, here's a woman who falls in love with this guy. And the long and short of it is he was messed up because of things that happened to him when he was a child and it involved his mother dying in front of him.
And it involved another woman, um, taking advantage of him, which, which influenced his kind of choice of how he had, could enjoy sex when he got older and the love that they had, you know, that eventually that, um, you know, that's what helped him overcome that. So the way that I looked at it was, you know, she was a strong woman. I thought, you know, she, you know, she was, she didn't let his money, you know, influence her, you know, she wasn't bought. She wasn't, you know, kind of overwhelmed by all of that part of it. She was able to be herself.
And that's what really attracted her to him was because none of that really seemed to bother her the way that, you know, it would for most women. So I, I kind of viewed her as being very independent and very strong, but also very much in love with somebody who, who obviously was fucked up and, and, you know, needed somebody normal to kind of set him straight.
So I guess, um, you know, we, we feel like, uh, the book or the movie is being criticized by all these different factions of people and, and every faction has valid points to make um you know for example the the bdsm community is criticizing it because he there's not like full disclosure full consent um he tied the knots wrong yeah he tied the knots wrong and and, Mr. Jones and I are very unfamiliar with that. So we cannot speak to that at all. Um, I get that. Uh, I don't think that the point in the movie was really to educate, um, the public on BDSM.
Did it, um, kind of open people's eyes towards the possible pleasures to be had from different types of, you know, bondage and different ways of expressing your sexuality. Yes, it did. So while it might not be true to form and, and accurate the way, you know, the, the BDSM wants to portray, um, themselves, at least it opens people's eyes to, aware of this type of pleasure to be had. Right. And there were people that, you know, criticized or didn't like the way that her writing style. And it got on my nerves, too. I'm not going to lie.
You know, a lot of repetitive phrases and, you know, some things didn't flow flow very well right um but again if you don't like the writing style you know don't read the book right you know she she got her message out i mean it was successful so obviously that didn't have a it was crazy successful yeah so you know so anyway you can say what you want about her writing style but the fact of the matter is she she wrote it she told the story and and people consumed it you know so that's the reality of what this book is well the reality you know and people are like well you know he was fucked up and they had to use you know a kinky sex and this and that and the other well that's what sold the book i mean if they would have written a book about Mr.
Jones and I, I mean, it would be boring. You know, we have great sex, but there's lots of great sex in a lot of other books. I mean, you take a 27-year-old multi-billionaire with the curly copper locks and the aloof personality, you know, that's what's going to sell books. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, the normal, you know, having normal people do everything the right way. You know, you're right. It would not have been as popular and it would not have sold as much as it did. And because us normal people are boring. I mean, let's face it. I know.
I don't think you're boring and I don't think you think I'm boring, but I don't know if millions of people would want to read our story. Yeah. And, you know, and even the movie itself, what, you know, people are, you know, movie critics or movie critics, but you know, how good was the acting and how was it produced? And, you know, I don't, again, I don't, I don't really, to me, that's not distracting. I, you know, I've, I just, I thought they did a pretty good job. I really thought, um, Anna was convincing in her role. Um, and I, and so I don't, you know, I don't, I don't look at it that way.
So I think you can get kind of distracted by that as well as it's not produced very well or it's not.
I think one of the main things that I, I thought about and it's probably because I'm a woman is you know a lot of people were saying that it was a um kind of an abusive relationship and and there was no consent for um you know the bondage issues that you know that came up during their sex play but I don't know I I didn't really see it as a lack of consent she might not have had a full understanding of what was going to happen to her but she did trust him enough to try it right um sometimes when you try something new you don't know what it's going to be like until you experience it you don't i you know i i don't eat sushi and that kind of drives mr jones crazy because he's like you haven't tried it how do you know if you like it or not and i just something about putting raw fish in my mouth i just can't quite get there unused toothbrushes oh yeah they're like putting somebody's toothbrush in my mouth but so i don't know if i like it because i haven't tried it well it's the same thing with sex you know when you when you try something new you don't really know if you're going to experience pleasure from it until you try it um you know i getting caned i don't know that i really would think i would experience pleasure from that but but this is how i think that she was really um it's a really a whole lot deeper character than people give her credit for because she allowed him to hurt her and then when he did that she was able to explain to him why she couldn't live with that right and you could argue that that was not consensual but that's not what she was trying to do she was trying to get him she was trying to connect with him she was trying to get him to understand why he didn't need to do that and so she allowed him to hurt her but she also trusted him enough to know that she really wasn't going to get hurt that badly.
I mean, you could tell that he was, he was, you know, respectful and gentle and would have stopped if she would, and cared about her. Well, I mean, they had a, they had a safe word and she didn't use it. She chose not to use it. Right. Right. So I think, I think I admire her. You know, I think that people kind of sell the character short. I just enjoyed, I enjoyed the way, you know, I mean, let's face it, men, we were messed up anywhere.
We're blockheads, you know, even if it's not something like, you know, hitting somebody when you're having sex, it's, you know, we need you women to teach us how to function in society anyway. So that's true. So what else about the, I mean, we enjoyed the movie. The movie theater experience was kind of interesting because we noticed that, well, first of all, I don't know that there was probably about 80% female to 20% men. And the ladies were like in clusters together, you know, kind of giggling. It was a girl, lots of girls nights out. Yeah. It was a Friday night. Right. So I, I don't know.
Do you have an opinion on that? I wonder, I wonder what it is, why that is. Is it, is it because I was feeling pretty good about myself because I was at the movie theater with you. So, you know, I was on a hot date and they were with their girlfriends and that's not nothing wrong with that. I like going out with my girlfriends too. But, um, you know, I got to experience it with you and you and I got to have hot, sexy conversations on the way home about it.
Um, you could tell some of the ladies there probably didn't have a lot of experience with, um, sexual variety, I guess, you know, so it was very titillating to them to see, um, you know, all the sex scenes and everything. So, you know, maybe they haven't really watched porn. So that was very, um, foreign to them. Or maybe they have, but they just haven't been able to feel good about, feel like they could talk about, about it.
And that, you know, and that, and that really gets down to, you know, why it's very similar to kind of what we choose to do in the lifestyle with, with sharing our ourselves is because, you know, we're human beings are just wired that way. And you can put your head in the sand or you can try to or if you listen to your pastor and he says, don't read it, you can you can try to suppress this stuff. And in my opinion, when he says don't read it, that makes everybody want to read it. Well, there's that aspect of it too.
You know, I just, I just feel like sometimes in America, you know, like drinking, you know, you can't drink until you're 21. Well, we, you know, we have terrible, terrible percentages of people that drive drunk, you know, because drinking is so taboo. Right. And then, you know, sex is taboo in America. And then you have so many politicians getting caught doing horrible things behind their wives' backs because it's just, it's taboo. So we think we have to sneak around about it. Right.
Of course, we're sneaking around about our activities and lifestyle, but we don't sneak around it and about it in front of each other. Right. Yeah.
I mean, so that, that's really, um, you know, one thing I noticed is, is that we, you know, we, you and I tend to fall outside the norm when it comes to, I understand, you know, when a pastor, he's talking to most of the congregation or a movie critic, they're talking to, you know, most of their audience, but, you know, to have a relationship like ours, that's strong enough and people that get into the lifestyle, you know, you know, the reason that you do it is because your relationship is strong and you're trying to improve it and you're open-minded about it.
And you understand that the physical compared to the emotional. And, you know, if you, if you just try to ignore that or suppress it, you know, we shouldn't be surprised that that people fall back or whatever the word you want to use. You mentioned politicians. Why are we surprised? I mean, that's never going to change. We're human beings. That's always going to happen. And so this movie, though, what it does in this book is it gives us an opportunity to share things about the lifestyle without using the lifestyle word.
So if somebody wants to talk about Fifty Shades and they want to talk about the type of sex, it opens the door for a conversation and you try to meet them where they are and have an authentic conversation with them about why they like it, why they were interested in it and try to get them to open their minds just a little bit and and that's all you don't really have to convince them to do anything that's not what this is about but well i mean i can talk to my vanilla girlfriends about sex now because we can talk about 50 shades right you know a lot of my girlfriends though we don't talk about that anymore you know it's so boring but now you know there's actually a topic out there that is mainstream and and you know i can use it as a conversation starter well like cooper said in our interview with him he said you know butt plugs and anal fisting were words that were used in the movie and now you feel like it's okay yeah i you know i can actually say that in public because it was in the movie theater so it does give you permission to kind of saying it's okay doing it's not at least not here yeah no no i'm with you on that one who knows no no no it's not okay now don't-minded.
On that, I think I'm going to be. But anyway, moving on. I think that's really about all we had to say about Fifty Shades. I just really kind of wanted to throw it out there since it is a way to tie our sexuality into kind of mainstream America. Right. And you know what? There's two more movies coming. There are.
know so again if you haven't seen the movie you just don't know the whole story so just you know stay tuned and keep it open mind right and and when the two new movies come out that's two more opportunities to kind of engage people in conversation no matter what your how your approach is on this so no the book's not written as well as could be. I guess the movie's not as produced as well as it could be, but just take it for what it is and no need to pick it apart.
Right, and I think before we close up and move on, I think it's good for us to say again that we approach this movie and this book from the same place that we approach our podcast topics and that is how it affected our relationship how we talked about it what our view of it was and so you know we're not telling anybody what they should believe or what's right or what's wrong we're just kind of approaching it the same way that we do we're not experts in any of these fields.
You know, and the last thing that we want to do is try to, you know, speak as representatives for certain groups, you know, that have very strong opinions or advocates or, you know, about these things. And a lot of them make some good points. And believe me, all you have to do is Google Fifty Shades and you're going to find all these voices and blogs and articles out there if you're that interested in reading some of it. So it really has stirred up a lot of interest. And, you know, I think we choose to look at it as a positive opportunity and, you know, we enjoyed it. Yep, we did.
So stay tuned for the next movie. so my snapshot comes from our winery meet and greet that we just did this past sunday and you know like like i mentioned earlier mr jones met this lady and um that the single lady well she's not single but she was there by herself her husband was out of town on travel so he met her and he was just come i had not met her i mean i had been introduced to her and then the guy that she was with um i started talking to him you know the club orient guy so I started talking to him and we kind of ended up physically separating from Mr.
Jones and the other lady, kind of came around the coffee table a little bit. So just watching Mr. Jones with this other lady was just very entertaining for me because I think he was paying 99% attention to her and 1% attention to me, which is very unusual for him. He's usually very much more, you know, tuned into, you know, where I am and who I'm talking to. Not that he thinks he needs to be my watchdog, but that's just kind of the way he and I are wired with each other.
So he was just fully engaged with her, and I don't think it's a coincidence that she happens to be very pretty and um she seemed to be very intelligent and articulate we learned a new word i'm totally digressing here but we learned a new word from cooper right um what's in the urban dictionary it's in the urban dictionary why i hadn't heard of it before but I think Cooper had mentioned it. It's sapiosexual, right? Yes. And the definition of sapiosexual is somebody that is attracted to someone's mind. So it's someone's intellect. Right. And I think that pretty much describes a lot of how Mr.
Jones and I approach people as far as how we're interested in them. Of course, we're interested in how they look and their body language and their personalities. But I think we're both very much attracted to people that are intellectual and that we can actually have a conversation with. And I think we need to clarify intellectual. Not nerdy, although I am kind of a nerd. No, that's not what I mean. No, the word intellectual can sometimes conjure up, you know, like, um, better than somebody else or smarter than somebody else. And it's not that at all.
It's, it's sharing what you believe and why you believe it. And it's those two things to me. And so if you say, you know, what you're about or what you believe and why you believe it and it's those two things to me and so if you say you know what you're about or what you believe and then you and then you talk about why you're that way that that's just fascinating to me so it's not i just want to clarify it's not it's not anything about you know intelligence it's so you don't ask somebody their iq huh no no no. I don't because, you know, we can get into, we're digressing.
I'll let you finish here. So anyway, he was having a very intellectual conversation with this lady. It was stimulating. It was stimulating in more than one way, I think. Stimulating is the right word. A multifaceted, stimulating conversation. So I, I just, um, I found that to be very entertaining. And so at the same time he's having this conversation and I'm kind of left to my own devices. And I ended up talking to this, this guy that, that had visited Club Orient. And then this other guy came over and we started talking to him.
And then the next thing I was standing there talking to four guys. It was just me and four guys. And at one point, you know, I had already had a couple of glasses of wine by then. And I'm just standing there and the guys were all talking and I was just kind of taking it all in. I'm standing there thinking, this is kind of like a meat market. And I feel like I'm in the display case. You were the fresh meat. I was the fresh meat. We were the new couple there. Right. I think I tried to glance your way once, and I couldn't even see you because there were so many men around you.
And I said, oh, well, she can take care of herself. So it was fun. I think their wives had migrated out. It was a beautiful day that day. And there was a really nice front porch on this winery, a really big front porch. And I think a lot of the ladies had migrated out there to soak up the sun. But let me add something to that. That would not happen in a vanilla world. Well, it could, but here's what didn't happen. The four wives of those four men were just fine. Right. They did not come and claw my eyes out. I ended up talking to all of them before the afternoon was ever. Yeah, right.
I mean, I'm biased, but you're really extremely beautiful and attractive. And, and so, and obviously these guys saw the same thing, but they just saw fresh meat. I was just a girl. I mean, so not only do I feel, you know, safe and environment, and I know that they're not going to do anything disrespectful.
And know you can but i also know that their their wives are perfectly fine with no they were at the end they were all wonderful they all i eventually ended up meeting all four of them oh there you are i haven't had a chance to introduce myself yet and okay so but it was really so your snapshot is there and and they were a couple of them were pretty tall a lot taller than me and i'm not very tall so tall. So yeah. So I definitely felt like I was the specimen. Yeah. I think you, you were enjoying that part of it. I was. Yeah. Okay.
So my snapshot, my snapshot, um, is from the marriage conference that we went to. We stayed in a hotel room, unlike any that we've ever stayed in before, because stayed in before because my sister-in-law is like diamond status with this hotel chain, and she was able to give us a suite. And we usually skimp on the hotel room because when we go to Desire in places like that, we don't spend a lot of time. No, we're out and about.
We don't spend a lot of time in the room, so we always justify getting the smallest room and and spending our time you know outside although we have a badass balcony booked for our cruise in a couple weeks yes we do well but anyway sorry yeah anyway we we we get on the elevator and the and the front desk person said well you oh you're in a suite i said okay well so what i, well, so what? I mean, embassy suite. So what's a suite? I mean, everybody uses that word. So we go up to the top level of the hotel, and we walk all the way down to the end of the hall. We had two room numbers.
That was the first clue. Yeah, we had two room numbers. And we turned the corner, and we had double doors into our room. And you open those double doors, and it was like a party room i mean there was sofas it was the whole end of the hotel room the whole end of the building was like our room right there was a huge flat screen tv there was a bose surround sound system there was windows all along the wall that had window seats lounges next to them we were on the 14th floor So we had a beautiful view of the city. Yeah, and there was a bar, and there was two bathrooms.
And this was before we even got into the other part that was actually the bedroom, which was nice in and of itself. So the two of us had this whole suite. And we were like, damn, this is a vanilla weekend. I know. And it was the best hotel room. We could have had the best play party. That's the first thing we thought of was, oh my gosh, we could have a heck of a swinger party in this place. That's not my snapshot. But anyway, and we really took advantage of it. I mean, we spent a lot of time in there because there was some homework that you had to do on this, this weekend.
And we had brought some wine and some liqueur 43. So anyway, they gave us homework and we all went out to dinner together. Saturday night was date night. We had a, we had a wonderful dinner and came back and went back to the room and you went and changed into your lingerie.
We had homework do right we had homework to do and there was a desk in the room and like a beautiful nice big executive right i was fiddling around with the stereo or something trying to get it to work in the meantime you had changed and you came back and you sat at the in the in the desk chair at an executive chair and he's still fiddling with the bow system yeah so so you're in and the outfit that you had on and i'm probably going to do actually i took a picture of it you won't let me post it on the website no i won't it's like a it's like a bra and panty set but it's got a very thin it's a teddy no no no no don't use that word because it wasn't a teddy it's a it's a bra and panty set with a very very thin strip of material that that connects the That's a, it's a bra and panty set with a very, very thin strip of material that, that connects the center of the bra down the center of your belly to the, to the bottoms.
Yeah. Okay.
So that, and you sat down in that, in that executive leatherback chair and you put your reading glasses on and you that was sexy no if you ever watch any porn have you watched porn uh yes i have okay this is the episode where like the secretary gives the boss a blow job you're sitting at an executive desk so let me finish my story okay sorry and you and you've got this outfit on and you have your reading glasses down on the edge of your nose and you've got your wine glass in your in your hand your homework out and your pencil and your legs cross like you're ready to to do work and i'm waiting for him to finish fiddle and then finally i said excuse me um the ceo is calling the meeting to order and he turned around he said what and then what?
And then he was like, oh, oh. Yeah, oh. So the image of you in that outfit sitting behind that desk with your glasses on conjured up a few scenes that I've seen in movies before. Anyway, we quickly dispatched of the homework. No, I made Mr. Jones do the homework first. Yeah. A little anticipation never hurt anybody. anybody. Yeah, and we could talk about that, but I know we want to talk about that in another episode because we used all the homework time to talk about lifestyle stuff. Yes, we did. This is the third time we had been to this conference. We had pretty much covered everything.
Right, right. We figured out we have a great marriage. So, I don't know, I might be able to edit that picture to a point where you might let me at least put it on Cassidy or something. Yeah. Yeah, you could put it on Cassidy. Okay. Well, anyway, that was quite an image. And you sitting in that huge suite with the music playing and in your outfit was quite the snapshot. Yes. So those are our snapshots for this week. The other thing that we want to do before we close, we've been sharing listener questions and listener feedback.
And last, not last episode, the last episode where we talked about full, oh, you know what? We need to tell everyone what you did to our profile after our last. Oh, right. i had this moment like in the middle of recording our podcast i'm thinking to myself you dummy if you don't want people with a no kissing rule to contact you you need to put i like to kiss in my profile right so after we finished podcasting i was like uh mr jones we need to change our profile and he what do you mean? And I said, we need to say something in there that we really like to kiss.
And he was like, oh, that's a really good idea. So we did. We went in there and put it in there twice so that people could really kind of pick up on that. But that's not all you changed. I know. So then we also changed our profile to, say, full swap situational. Right. So we haven't done anything about it yet, but at least it's in writing now. But I think everyone needs to understand that it was the conversation that we had in Episode 5 that led us to do that.
So, you know, just having that conversation, and it didn't have to be on the podcast, but the fact that we had that conversation when we got to the end and talked about it a little bit more and decided to change our profile, you know, that was a pretty big step. And so I think what we're saying is exactly that, you know, that we are going to look for the right couple in the right situation.
Well, we're not going to're if if that occurs again um or the first time i guess then then we're prepared to full swap if the situation is right yep so and that was before we got any feedback yes and then oh wait a minute there's another funny story what so you told the story in episode five about the gentleman that you wanted to full swap with. Well, he, he listened to the podcast and we were out to dinner that night that we went out to dinner with the other couple that we were talking to you about earlier. And, and I get this text and I said, who is this from?
And he said, Heyones this is from you know from we met you at desire i'm pretty sure that mrs jones just talked about me and i said yes it seems like you have some unfinished business to take care of so and and then you couldn't remember how explicit that you were i know i had to go back and listen to episode five again and then i was like oh my gosh i said i told you i told you you were going to hear from him if you listen to that podcast because he knows he's missed his opportunity i know so everything happens for a reason and uh i think they uh they became members down there at desire didn't they so they'll probably be there a lot yeah they probably will so chances are we'll uh you may get your chance yeah that would not be a bad thing so so we digressed again but well so anyway what we want to do is um we we did get a lot of feedback and we appreciate the feedback that we got and i'm just going to take a minute to instead of share other questions share some of the feedback because i mean it's i mean you'll be able to tell that people really put some thought behind this i'm not going to read them all but we just picked a few out um and i'm not going to disclose any names because i didn't you know ask permission but anyway so one email we got um says uh love the podcast one of the most intelligent and articulate out there.
Oh, and I have to read this part. Helps that we're in the same age demographic and that Mrs. Jones has the sexiest voice on iTunes. Thank you. Thank you, Mr. Listener. Yes. The chemistry, love, and genuine fondness you two share. Boy, we have some people fooled. No, we don't. It's exceedingly evident. I enjoyed your soft versus full episode. Since finding a four-way attraction makes full swapping difficult, have you thought about or discussed threesomes? Both of you seem highly compulsive, and compulsive means the opposite of jealousy.
That means you actually enjoy watching your spouse and you love them more for observing them with somebody else. So it's the opposite of jealousy. Both of you seem highly compulsive and any jealousy issues arising from the temporary unfairness of the arrangement could be talked through afterwards i know he particularly enjoys seeing her pleasured and this might be a new and easier way to play so i'm gonna put you know you see last episode you put me on the spot yeah and i didn't tell you that I was going to do this tonight, so I want to put you on the spot. Okay.
Have you thought about or discussed threesomes? Well, is it going to be male, female, male, or is it going to be male, female, female? Well, I want to hear your opinion about male, male, female. Or male, female, male, however it goes. I think it has to be male, female, male if the men are not bisexual. So anyway, I would not be opposed to that, but we have to be full swap first. And we're not yet. Well, why do you say we have to be full swap first?
we're not yet well why do you say we have to be full swap because i i think for the single male to really be an active participant i think you have to have options you know as as far as things that you can do so i really and honestly the single male i i would think the majority of single males out there are interested in playing with couples where they can be in a full swap situation. That's just my assumption. I think we're, I think we're saying the same thing. I'm saying that a threesome would be, in my definition of a male, female, male, both males have penetrative sex with you. Right.
And that's what I'm saying. I'm not opposed to that down the road, but we haven't, we haven't full swapped yet. So would that be the way you would want to start out by watching me? So you're asking me, I'm asking you because I told you before that the thing that interests me about male, female, male is that that i'm involved and with a full swap with two couples i'm not involved with you but with a male female male i am right so but then i have to work through my issues because then I'm going to have these like insecurities about I'm getting to do something that you don't get to do.
And then I'm going to have like, it's going to be like a guilty pleasure and then I have to process all that. So I don't, I don't know. It's that whole risk and reward thing. Okay. I don't know. I'm not opposed to it, but I don't know that that's the way i'd want to start our full swap experience okay fair enough um all right let me go to another comment that we had on our blog um i heard about your podcast while listening to another podcast i've only had the chance to listen to the last one uploaded and thoroughly enjoyed it.
As far as the kissing goes, I don't think you should settle for less. Kissing is a thing that gets my coals burning too, and I would not want to compromise that for anyone. I like that you guys have followed your inner guidance about how fast or how slow you will go. The lifestyle is so multidimensional, and there is no one-size-fits-all. You guys relate your sexual escapades in a very intelligent and sensual manner, and I appreciate that. So that was really good feedback. And as a side note, he goes on to say, I'm curious, do you guys only play within your race?
Perhaps this is something you can talk about in your future episodes, which, which we may, but that was kind of a separate question. So, um, anyway, good, good feedback there. Um, let me see. That was the other podcast. Um, okay.
Hi there there guys we are a married couple that has fantasized about dipping our toes in the lifestyle for years but at least so far we've simply decided to live those fantasies vicariously that being said we found your podcast online the other day and saw oh okay i'm sorry that was the one who he recommended that we spell out we got a thing so that people would know i didn't mean to read that one but um okay here's one we're loving your podcast so far and hope you keep it up you asked for some feedback on a couple things so here's our two cents kissing we started out with that rule too based on her desire and stemming from the intimacy thing that so many share.
That didn't last too long. And looking back, it probably was really just a way to hold on to something of her own until the comfort level with everything else was there.
Since we came in that way and others put up with us, we do the same for anyone new that we come across if that's their rule but in hopes that they quickly get over it kissing is such a natural part of the whole act and we don't like having a list of rules that everyone has to keep track of but until everyone is comfortable with those rules we feel like they have to be honored so i thought that was a good that's a very good way to put it yeah that one yeah and on full and soft swap you said something along the lines of once you go full how do you tell someone you only want to soft swap with them simple it's your body do what you want with it we have on our profile that we full swap, but that's neither required nor guaranteed.
It's no different than any other swinging situation that you negotiate. Everyone gets a say what they want to do, and if you only want to soft that night, then that's it. Don't feel like that bridge is only one way. Once you cross it, you're allowed to go back and forth whenever you want. So again, very, very good feedback. And, you know, another reason why we're sharing this is because it's been helpful to us, but it's probably helpful, you know, for others as well. Okay, here's the feedback from the couple that we met at the meet and greet that were fans of ours.
And he gave us this feedback before he knew who we were. Oh, that's right. No kissing makes no sense to us anyway. We've met a few people that had that rule but quickly dropped it. Kissing has been an integral part of our flirtation with other couples. When we go to any meet and greet, we actually meet a new couple. One of the factors that plays a role in whether we may pursue anything further is a kiss. Just our two cents, loving the podcast. And so you did kiss him. I did kiss him. So we were talking to them and we had met them at the very first, at the girls on cork meet and greet.
And then we we saw them again at the meet and greet a couple weeks ago and put two and two together. And they figured out that we were the We Gotta Thing podcasters. And he said something about, you know, that no kissing rule is bullshit or something. So we were kind of joking around about that. And he was talking about our podcast. And so they were leaving. They needed to go to the bar and get another drink.
So were walking away and I said wait a minute and I said so remember I have no kissing I don't have a no kissing rule so I reached over and gave him a big old kiss and he was actually a really good kisser yeah yeah well and the last one that I want to share and I know that I know that I can share his name because this is Jay from Average Swinger. This is going to be entertaining. Feedback on full swap. If you do it with two different couples, it will no longer be a big deal anymore. Just like soft swap isn't a big deal.
But as there is no right or wrong way to swing, you guys never have to do full swap if you don't want to. You know, and, you know, Jay likes to act like he's not that intelligent, but he he really is. He's got it figured out. He does. Even though he's a tater, he he does have it figured out. Well, he's got it figured out. And he's also he and Angie, you can just tell by listening to them. And of course, we got to meet them for a few minutes at Noddy New Orleans last year. You know, they just, they have a great relationship. And you can tell that they're really tuned into each other. Right.
So he acts like a goofball. But I think he's pretty much got it together. So thanks, Angie. You've done a very good job. Way to train him, Angie. Good job, girl. Yeah. So that was really, we got more feedback than that, but those are the ones I kind of picked out. And I was just kind of taken aback because people really took the time and gave us some thoughtful and helpful, very helpful feedback. So this is, you know, we're still fairly new at not only the lifestyle, but at podcasting.
And so I just, we just appreciate the fact that people took so much time to thoughtfully share their comments.
And, and on that note, you know, any, anytime you comment or send us an email, you're going to hear back from us right away, because I think, you know, feedback and dialogue is a part of this kind of two-way communication and relationship so um thanks everyone who sent feedback yes it was really your your picture must have done the trick um and the fact that we you changed our profile you know that made some progress i don't know it's so funny i you know when we were changing i'm like why didn't we think of that before yeah you know have one of those aha moments, finally. Right.
As you guys have figured it out, we're just kind of slow. It takes us a while to figure stuff out. We're deliberate. We're deliberate. If you want to put it that way, you go right ahead. That sounds better. So as we approach closing, do we want to... You, I have to give you...
This is a brilliant idea you have for episode eight do you want to try to describe it well we're we were coming home well okay we were making the mad dash from the vanilla marriage conference to the swinger meet and greet on Sunday and we were talking in the car about lessons learned from the conference and kind of how we were going to manage the meet and greet and and I was just you, my mind was constantly switching back and forth from a very, you know, vanilla type experience to, you know, going into another lifestyle experience.
And I said, you know what, we need to, because we're getting ready to go to CatalystCon in a week. Yes, it's next weekend. And we are very excited about that.
So that's going to be a a very like 180 degree different experience from what we just experienced at a christian marriage conference that we went to last weekend so i i want to kind of do a compare and contrast because i don't think the underlying message is going to be that different right because it's all about a healthy relationship is a relationship where you're honest with yourself and where you communicate with your partner period right so we're going to take our experience from the vanilla marriage conference and we're going to take our experience from catalyst con and we're going to draw some comparisons for you and talk about that and episode eight and we're hoping that that we think that's going to be really interesting at least it's going to be interesting for us yes it is and we're looking forward to um i think life on the swing set is going to be podcasting live from catalyst con and we're getting we're going to meet some people that um you know we've been looking forward to, um, meeting from sex positive community that we've heard about or read about or read their blog.
So we're looking forward to that very much. So, so that's next weekend. And then the weekend after that, we get to go on our vanilla cruise. Oh, speaking of feedback. Yes.
So the plans have changed slightly yeah we we um gosh i so there's more feedback that we got yeah because a couple um that listened to us from miami um said hey before you go to trapeze on friday night you might want to check the calendar because there's single males there that night and sometimes they have theme nights and if you've never been there before and you only have a limited amount of time be sure you understand what you're walking into because Saturday night is typically a more comfortable night for couples yeah so we did that and we looked into it and we see we weren't going to be getting landing until like 9 or 9 30 and to pay that fee to get in trapeze and then not have it be well didn't you say that it was like gangbang night well no that's what he said there was a theme one friday when they went oh okay yeah so we decided that was a little off-putting for me so since i haven't even full swapped yet the whole gangbang thing right sounds intriguing in my head but in reality i don't know if i'm ready for it no i know i'm not ready for it so instead of doing that we're just gonna um go to miami and stay overnight in a hotel in miami and go out on the cruise the next day so anybody in miami that wants to get together for a late drink on friday night you know give us a april 3rd is when we're flying but anyway that what what led me to recall that was a few weeks ago we went to ohio to visit family and i on twitter i put out something that we were in ohio and i had two or three different couples from ohio and western pennsylvania reach out to us and say hey what part of ohio are you in and and we were in the southwestern part of the state So we weren't close enough to to visit anyone but um i thought well man dang we we're using this podcast the wrong way we just need to tell people where we're headed and see see if we get invitations you know all along we could probably travel across the country and just get people to say if anybody's going on a cruise out of miami on april 4th yeah um and you don't have a black ring on you know let us know ahead of time because we're gonna be looking for black rings but you know let us know ahead of time we could uh even if you're taking your family with with we'll we'll help sneak you out yeah you know after nine or ten o'clock yeah they got they have kids clubs for that yeah yeah so anyway that that's probably gonna happen before that'll be before our next podcast yeah we'll podcast again at the end of april but we're uh we're have a couple dinners lined up between now and then possibly a dinner party and yeah and a couple dinners yep so anyway that pretty much uh that pretty much wraps everything up right i think it does okay i't think so.
So again, if you want to contact us, please do through, um, email is the best at, at we got a thing. And that's all one word. W E G O T T A T H I N G at gmail.com. You can certainly comment on the website, but if you want to have a back and forth dialogue, send us an email. It's the best way to way to reach us and communicate with us. Again, our website is wegotathing.com and Twitter at wegotathing. Okay, so let me tell this demographic. If you're over 40, you need to get a Twitter account.
And I have to admit, I mean, I had one before but didn't really use it, and I'm having so much fun with the We Got a Thing Twitter account. I know. Every night at dinner, I'm like, honey, what was the tweet of the day? I mean, I try to come up with a creative tweet every day. And you really, if you want to get to know us better, you know, and a lot of people will do an anonymous Twitter account and only follow, you know, podcasters or, you know, whoever it is that, you know, you keep it separate from your main account.
So those of you who are afraid of technology or are the late adopters, I encourage you to, um, open up a Twitter account and, and, um, you know, request to follow us and you can keep up with us that way. So that's, it's been a lot of fun. So anything else, Mrs. Jones? I don't know. I think we about wrapped it up for tonight. Okay, well, thanks for listening. Again, we are Mr. and Mrs. Jones, and we got a thing. What's your thing? I can't believe you forgot about the story about the guy with the long schlong.
