
Show notes
We catch up with a local sex positive trainer who excites a conversation around squirting. D learns that his school Career Councillor was crap as we sit down for the first (but not only time) with the man who makes a living training men, help their ladies, and women how to squirt! Mid-life career change… Read more
Transcript
This is C. And this is D. And this is Swinging Down Under. Welcome to a very special episode. We are here with Mr. Hansy himself. That's a little... Come on, Hansy's the nickname. That's the nickname. Yeah, so what's the real name? It is Hunkhands. Welcome. Hello, how's it going? Good. Nice to be here. We're glad to have you here.
But we're going to need you to be closer to the mic so that you'll have to to lean in you'll have to snuggle in so we're sharing two uh two mics this evening so um hansy and um and see have a mic to share hopefully he doesn't get too hansy under the table yes or does well that that's actually the nickname have you ever been called hansy before no do you know what the term is to get handsy? No. Okay. Does that mean frisky? Yes. Well, frisky with the hands, yeah. So it's a bit of an Australianism, a bit of an Australianism, the handsy, yeah.
But getting handsy with someone means that they're touching up when maybe they shouldn't be. Or maybe they, it actually really doesn't matter. It's not myunk hands well a little bit of an introduction um how about you let mr mr hunk hands give himself an introduction okay those of you who haven't listened to us in a while, we are now based in Singapore. So Singapore is a pretty interesting country. Small country, but also a little bit of a sexually oppressed country. And yet, here we find Hunkhands, who specializes in... Sensual massage for women. Sensual massage. What?
Just drop that and let it resonate. Let it simmer. Just let it simmer. Letting it percolate. Sensual massage for women. So another way of calling it, like another sort of subcategory of that is yoni massage. So that's like specifically the vagina and sort of helping a woman kind of feel out all the areas of her vagina so that she can kind of get comfortable with that.
So what sorry what was that what was that yoni yoni massage y-o-n-i wow yeah and then the opposite for guys is called a lingam massage which is uh useful maybe in like prolonging orgasm if you're a premature ejaculator somebody who's really i just thought that was a rub and tug. Sometimes it is. Sometimes that's code. Code. Okay. So there you go. Well, we educated you on something a little earlier. You've educated us on something now. Yeah. I, before we get started into everything, I actually have, I'm going to, this is our first question for the evening.
And it's actually from one of our Twitter followers, Alec Blake underscore 72. Now, before we get into'm gonna this is our first um question for the evening and it's actually from one of our twitter followers alec blake underscore 72 now before we get into everything this is a good precursor he wants to know how does one choose this profession and how long does it take to master um i'll start with the second part so i spent maybe three four years with girlfriends you having watched porn, having watched squirting, trying to figure out what it's all about.
Three to four years to really kind of, you know, try enough. And I've slept with a lot of women, so I had a lot of practice.
But after maybe like a solid year of trying it out, then I kind of felt comfortable where if I really wanted to make a girl squirt, I probably do it it's sort of above the 50 percentile kind of tomorrow okay wow so practice really does make perfect yeah no it takes a lot of practice definitely for sure so did you start on your professional journey uh before you were the consummate professional of actually making or helping ladies and men i mean you you have trained or not trained looking for the most appropriate wording right right so i don't make guys squirt i teach them i teach them how to make their girls squirt thank you for um thank you for putting that a little more precisely than i can because um i get a lot of guys who um like originally they came on my website and they're like this is cool but how do i do this with my girl because i don't want to hire you specifically to come in and touch my girl because not everybody's comfortable with that so they're like how do i do it i'm like well just watch videos online and you know spend a couple years figuring out so uh i started doing courses where i can try to you know like get them get them on the fast track all the information they need and then also do some uh some actual like hands-on practice with the model so that i can work out some of the kinks in their style like right away and then they can go off and you know hopefully have a faster so i take it the model is typically not their partner no no no it's somebody that i it's either a friend of mine or it's like somebody that i employ okay okay yeah wow that's um that's interesting so for the ladies out there listening that are based in singapore that are maybe interested in becoming the model where can they where can they get in contact with you if the lady so desires to perhaps you know partake interview would be required first because like uh you know uh hands-on interview i'm thinking I'll see you next time.
If the lady so desires to perhaps, you know, partake. Interview would be required first because, like, you know... A hands-on interview, I'm thinking? Yeah. Is this like a... Honestly, yeah. This sort of sounds like one of those 70s movie interviews, you know, where it happens behind the scenes. Casting couch. Casting couch. Wow.
Yeah, no, I mean, if they went on my website and they threw me a note i could uh i could maybe schedule them you know you can see um i i usually try to work with the same people over and over for the guy courses though because when you have four guys and their sort of expectation is to sort of be with a professional you know model who can squirt if she can't squirt at the end they're like uh did i do this wrong yeah it's almost like the pass mark isn't it you know yeah yeah you're sorry you failed the course why because you couldn't make the model squirt and she squirts all the time yeah exactly is that a fail because if that's a fail then i've failed up until no see where i'm going with this is practice makes perfect so you just need to sign up to the intermediate or the uh expertise yeah is there a good question actually do you have beginners intermediate and advanced class i do i don't one-on-ones with guys so if somebody wants like personalized coaching then i've done a couple of those okay they're pretty expensive though you know because it's like me a model hotel room for like four hours so that obviously is more expensive so most guys go for the uh like group courses we're at four guys all at once yeah okay yeah in true c style um i have a list of questions and let's dig in so good so um handsy aka hunk hands doesn't know the questions that we're gonna ask tonight so i have a feeling they're gonna be like intrusive oh and just convoluted twisting the knife yeah you're going to be basically having sex with a chainsaw awesome looking forward to that let me just go start the chainsaw i won't be a second it's like scarface um actually this question as well this one was inspired by a recent skype talk with our friends over in the states so that's um upon, upon another podcast, we got a thing, Mr.
And Mrs. Jones, you know who you are. Mr. Jones had this question and he has too, actually. Oh yes. So you would like to know what do you wear when you're performing and showing people or helping a woman to get to that point where she's squirting and what do you wear? What do I wear? Yep.
I first i wore like a towel like a like a you know full-on like a hazmat suit no no like a fluffy towel like a fluffy towel yeah but i pack all of this stuff in like a little briefcase so i can bring it over to like either the ladies condo or to a hotel or something like that and uh fluffy towels are like super bulky because they're fluffy so what i do now is i have like just a sheet so it's basically just a barrier just like a psychological barrier so it's sort of like a sarong you know here in southeast asia just like sort of wrap it around once or twice like do a little do a little loop loop on the top and then it's sort of there but it's just very thin see we were envisaging you know if you've ever seen the tuna fishermen with their their yellow hats and full yellow suits that's what we figured might be the required might be the required barrier outbreak yeah the bubble the bubble suit yeah yeah i mean you know actually that leads on to a question that's not that question you're about to ask see it's more um have you ever um had to blink it out what does that mean a blink has there ever been a lady's version of a money shot oh like in the face yeah where you've had to actually blink it out you know uh i don't i don't think so that's a great that's a great question yeah i mean we are notorious for weird questions normally normally they come from c though so um it's gotten wet but like the position i like for squirting is uh sort of like where you're over the top of the woman with like one arm sort of stabilizing yourself so usually my left arm because that's not the dominant arm so that'll be like over the top of the lady if she's on her back facing up so my left arm is over and then my right arm is between her legs let me just slide everything off the table and you can show us on c actually um i've watched a video so if you go to www.hunkhands.com you got it yep um you can actually watch some videos you need to obviously sign up to prove you're not a pervert but maybe to prove you are probably well it's up to you yeah whichever way you want to go and you can actually watch there's a radio button you click pervert not pervert well shit i'm actually pretty sure you clicked the pervert one didn't you pervert and then i was like extra step yeah extra pivot yeah it's like explicit like where's all the above where's d everything um so yeah so go along to that website because you can actually have a look at the videos yeah well yeah um my hands will give you some some guidance as to how to get to the videos you don't just get to click on the website and they pop up magically yeah it's given it's given the shit away but shit away, babe.
You can't just give the shit away. The next question that – I used to. I used to have it like right on my homepage. But then my bandwidth was crazy because people just sit there watching the videos. So I was like paying for the roof. I was like, all right. I was like, this is great. I like people watching it. But, you know, so I put it behind like an email thing now.
So it's free, put it in your then i'll send it to you great awesome but to answer the question so i um like in the video you kind of see the position that i like yeah i'm probably like two feet away from like my head is probably like two or three feet away from the girl's like vagina so when the squirting is happening it's it would have to that would have to be a lot yeah a lot of squirting so i haven't had that yet i've had it like all up the arms though so again ladies in singapore if anyone's out there for the task um there you are um next question and also from mr jones he would like to know the surroundings when you're massaging okay are you on a table is there plastic involved these are like softball questions yeah well look we've got it but don't worry we're're yeah we're just um yeah we're giving you a false sense of security so it can really sure that you know and i've seen it but you do a warm-up before you just get in there right same sort of scenario uh yeah oh yeah for sure for sure like it's probably it's probably like 45 minutes of more of like a swedish massage i've studied some balinese massage so I try to incorporate the sort of sensual, sort of more skin, not so much the deep muscle kind of stuff.
So it's like really warm you up, get you super comfortable. Because the main thing about squirting is you have to be really comfortable.
So maybe 45 minutes in, that's where I'll start to like move towards the vagina and towards the clit and like inner, you know, inner stuff very slowly so plastic sheets oh um i bring my own sheets and i usually do it in a five-star hotel so sometimes i book out a five-star hotel for like the course and then like the next day before i check out i'll have a so what you're saying is some other fucker has to clean it up uh no so okay so watch out sheridan my actual like the actual way I do it is I take a towel and then I put that down on the bed and then I put one of my like black sheets over the top of that because that's sort of just I think black is nice yeah like you can either do black or red or something like that but it's something sensual sexy yeah it's a little different sort of gets you out of your head it's you know like oh this is this is new this isn't just me lying in a normal bed and also um the the black and red obviously not the some of the greatest colors for not showing massive wet spots or things like that and actually would totally match our decor so yeah it's winning really for us good good for showing uh female ejaculation though because like uh you know like the milky sort of stuff yeah sometimes which uh actually you can really see it afterwards so yeah okay yeah like for me that's interesting because when you're in the process you know you're trying to you're focused on her you're not so much focused on like data gathering you know like did she did she squirt did she ejaculate blah it's more after the fact where you can sort of like once you know that she's good she's like taking a shower or something and you can like oh okay this this happened it didn't happen yep so yeah i mean there you go i mean we've just we you and i have discussed the the um white ejaculate yeah on on my penis when i'm with c and and she's never really understood what the fuck it was ta-da it could be um you know like uh during different parts of the month the girl's vaginal fluids like have different consistencies you know like the whole family planning thing where you can sort of you know you can taste it or whatever you can see that so like i've heard that some people if they're at the right phase then then there's enough like penetration then it can sort of turn into a white sort of sticky stuff that's possible but actually that does not happen to me okay no don't and have not in eight years which is great no interruption to the swinging lifestyle yeah routine yeah um yes so that's never been well it's never been something we've had to consider how does how does it happen for you like how do you when you when the white sticky stuff comes out seriously she would not have a clue okay no no and frankly it's not that regularly so i wouldn't have i wouldn't really understand it either i've heard some guys or some girls when they masturbate um they can do it just clitorally like i had this one student at one of my courses and he's like is this it like because we were talking about the differences between squirting which is like sort of the peen style and then like the female ejaculate like the milky style he's like is this it and he shows me his a picture that his girlfriend had sent him or just like this blob like you, like bloop, you know, from her playing with a toy.
Wow. No, I don't, have you ever done that with a toy? Or masturbating? I don't think so. No, I've never seen it on a toy. We'll discuss this afterward. There has been on a toy. Remember that one time? No. Otherwise, I would have said that I remembered that one time. Oh, right, that would have happened, right. What kind of people are attending your sessions?
sessions so either the ladies or your group sessions like what type of people sure um for the ladies it's a really wide demographic like youngest was i think 22 oldest i don't ask it would probably be i mean obviously they'd probably be like late 40s would be my guess don't ask don't guess that's the rule uh-huh yeah and people who are fairly um sexually experimental people who are a little bit oppressed people who have been in long relationships short relationships i mean is it what's the range like and why are they coming to you yeah it's a huge range um let's see mean, I've had like one girl who was an escort and she was just like, this is interesting.
I've never heard of this. I want to give it a try. Just very curious, very sexually open. Wow. That's pretty cool. Yep. A lot of girls are, let's see, like they could be in a relationship and their boyfriend is not kind of like giving them the right kind of thing.
So sometimes it's with consent sometimes not um you know i mean i'm not gonna like kick them out the door if you know they're uh doing that because like what are they gonna do they're just gonna go out on tinder and like sleep with some random guy yep and then they're not gonna have a good time right so um so like uh some girls come to me because they've never had a vaginal orgasm lots of girls it's about squirting because that's kind of my thing so if they've heard about squirting maybe they've had different types of orgasms but they never squirted and they're like i just want to give Thank you very much.
had a vaginal orgasm lots of girls it's about squirting because that's kind of my thing so if they've heard about squirting maybe they've had different types of orgasms but they never squirted and they're like I just want to give it a try at least once and just see what it's all about that's that'd be the main thing well there's certainly at least one girl in this room who's never squirted that I'm aware of do you know who that is she wish we would get rid of that homeless lady in the corner no no no she feeds us quite well she cleans the house as well no um you've never squirted to my knowledge we tried we spent an hour and a half trying yeah but i mean i'm uneducated you're uneducated we just fooled around down there for an hour and a half had a whole lot of fun an hour and a half of trying an hour and a half of i mean that's like that's like saying we spent years trying to make a baby just practicing over and over and over again oh man that was so horrible 10 years later oh actually i can't have children i think it's really similar to um women conceiving actually like it's a pretty good analogy it's like there's one percent of women who really can't have a baby you know or something like that I don't know the actual figures but it's pretty small like physically can't have a baby most women can it's just like how long are they gonna take to conceive you know could be a year could be like whoops yeah you know first time they ever have sex that they have a same thing with um squirting some girls first time they have sex even if they're just like masturbating by themselves the first time they'll squirt um most women you know there's a lot of i think western women in general have a little bit more there's they're a little bit more cerebral than like um asian women in general i mean that's a gross generalization but you know i think it kind of holds true they're uh so western women in my experience you're allowed to generalize i mean we generally don't lead with facts slightly racist term but no no i mean it's it's no i don't think so i don't think it's racist because um well certainly in my experience the well some races are better than other races at certain things there you go um oh i thought you were gonna say like just being people and wow you now you wow this is taking a really steep downhill some people look better at some things than some people aren't so let's cut away yeah yeah i mean like i did uh like we were talking before about like dick sizes right like black guys are bigger caucasian guys are in the middle right that's not racist asian guys yeah well it's you know it's it's sort of racist it's like you know based on your race it's just gross generalization yeah i mean it's it's kind of the same thing like um in my general experience western women have a little bit more they're a little bit a little bit harder to like disengage the brain so um a lot of the squirting thing is about letting go and just like kind of like whoa kind, kind of totally getting carried away.
So Western women have a little bit harder time with it, you know, unfortunately. I'm starting to think that C might fit into the 1% after the fact that she spent a whole time on the table at a desire getting a sensual, what was it called? Ritual massage. Tantric massage. No, it wasn't tantric. You're throwing tantric in for no reason. It wasn't tantric. It was a 180 USD, right? Yeah, but it wasn't tantric. Because we would have been there for five hours if it were tantric. It wasn't tantric. It was just a ritual, sensual massage.
And you were thinking about their marketing material at the time. The point is this. Hashtag virtual problems. That's the point. Yeah, you were really enjoying them. I want to know about the women. I want to know... Whoa. She finally decides she's bi and now she wants to know about the women. That's all she's about now. Give me all the pussy. So, can any woman, can any woman try this?
Age, weight, size, body shape, and vaginal shape i mean what's what's your experience with like i said that broad range of women who can come to you and have this experience and let go such a softball question it's like anyone can come and use my service uh yeah well here we go do overweight women find it harder uh i find it harder with overweight women there you go less softball right nice i like it no definitely like with uh more like bigger women there's more to manage because like if you don't hold stuff it goes back in it so you got to like hold it and like separate and you got to get in there so it's so would you say that you're you're like when when you're talking about the ladies it's a bell curve you sort of fit in the middle of the bell curve you know in terms of how they look what their size is what their shape is that sort of thing yeah most are in the middle yeah the reason I would ask the reason i ask that is because either end of the bell curve i would i'd be sure that people would probably feel a little bit more um right like self-conscious self-conscious whether they're whether they're uber thin or uber uber big you know either either end of the spectrum people tend to be a bit more worried and hence that let go that you talk about may not be as as um as easy yeah yeah definitely yeah so maybe they don't even come to me like the super super thin and the like really obese i haven't had anybody like really obese um yeah but but like part of the shame thing is like turning off the lights um and like i do some blindfolding sometimes if somebody is sort of, if I can see them kind of looking around like, yeah, you know, it's too bright in here.
I'm going to put a blindfold on you. I mean, it's not because it's too bright. Well, that's a good idea. Yeah. Because I find I let myself go more. Definitely. If we're doing that. Or if you're in a dark place, for example, our secret spot on the St. Andrews cross, where it's dark, you tend to let yourself go a little bit more there. And also you're facing the wall, even though you know there's like 30 people behind you. Yes, and you're being spanked on the cross at the time. You don't like pubic hair. And also you don't like women who shave. Whoa, we're into the hard-hitting stuff now.
Well, yeah, how's that chainsaw? You recently said that you actually don't even like women that shave, and it affects sexual performance for you. Like stubble. Right, but shaving, you... But, yeah, you know, but stubble is not freshly shaved. Stubble is a day after.
You don't go on to say that women should wax i think so i think uh i think trimming is good or waxing or shaving very regularly but i think if you shave and you get the stubble you know like i think that's the worst so my question is around when you're doing this to a woman and she's a little bit of stubble what are you thinking what's going through your head you can like come on sister shave it up or do you get a little bush I've had oh my god your questions just I love them with if there's if there's like full-on bush you need to use a lot more oil and it's And there's just another thing to manage.
Jeeves, fetch me the weed whacker. It's just like another thing to manage. If you're overweight, you need to hold things in position so they don't flop back. It's the exact same thing with hair, right? Because if you let it go, it'll just flop back over the clit, over the vagina. See, my father always told me it's like parsley.
Just push it to the side and keep on eating yeah you gotta keep pushing it though you gotta like one hand sweetie yeah when was the last time your dad actually ate anything with fresh herbs oh yeah touche thank you so uh so yeah the long stuff i've done uh i think probably a lot of girls do get waxed before they see me you know just out politeness? Or just nervousness. Yeah. Well, I mean, I would imagine even for me, if I was to go to a sensual massage or a prostitute or something like that, I'd still... You just went from sensual massage to prostitution. You do realize that, right? Yeah.
There was no... Well, I mean, I was going from one end of the spectrum to the other end of the spectrum, right? I feel like one of the spectrum is, I'm going to see a girl on a date. That's not an end of the spectrum. There's no guarantee you're going to get laid if you see somebody on a date. What's the spectrum? Wait, what spectrum are we talking about? I'm trying to figure out... Try and keep up, man. Shit.
No, so what i'm saying is even if no matter what sexual endeavor sexual um experience i'm i'm involved in i'm going to try and make myself feel as confident as i can to do that i will put myself in the most confident situation which generally means grooming and you know we've like anyone who's listened to a couple of podcasts ago knows that i've bitched and moaned about that near enough. Yeah. So have you got another random question you'd like to ask? I do. Do you have any lifestyle clients? Any swingers have come in to see you, partake? That is a good question.
I think, yeah, so I've met just one girl comes to mind who, like, was talking to me about how she'll like go up with her husband and swap couples and stuff like that but they were just getting into it so i think meeting me was attractive and what's their number i mean they're local uh chinese singaporean so i don't know i haven't met the guy just met the girl but um yeah i think i think um the guy being okay with the girl going off to see me when he knows that there's not going to be any sex involved um i think that's like a baby step towards sort of opening up so is there always no sex involved that was that was my question is there always no sex involved uh i mean like i don't charge for sex but if i'm turned on like and uh that's a good we've got a segue there so i mean like i've met some girls after i probably shouldn't say this because now everybody's going to be like well how about we just meet you know for a date uh but yeah no downside no hang on downside is you know it makes a living from from this.
This is probably the downside like the relationship that you have with somebody when it's when there's like money involved is a little bit more I mean, it's it's like if you're a therapist, you know, and somebody comes in your office You're gonna talk to them about your problems.
Um, you know, you're very empathetic and you're like actually you care about them and stuff But that doesn't mean that you want to spend like Saturday having, you know like hot dogs with them yeah of course you know there's like friends and there's people that you care about like in a professional sense so sometimes like for me just somebody like some something clicks and i'm like all right i would actually like to see you um you know like one-on-one outside of the profession that's not really a surprise you know like i don't think that there's anyone in any form of um sensual business out there that i mean every everybody has a heart right eventually you're going to find somebody that you're why are you screwing your face up because i don't think that this is about people just in sensual no no it's in everything but i need people at You meet people at the coffee shop, wherever, and you just kind of, you do.
You end up having... I'm currently doing the talky-talky thing with my hands. Yeah, it's like a work sort of relationship. Yeah, it's a work relationship, right?
I mean, should I be worried about you with some of the guys that you bump into at the water cooler yes basically depends how hard you bump into it well played um okay well let's talk about your sexual experiences okay sure what has been one of your favorite and hottest and just actually what do you what do you masturbate to like what's that night or that day or that experience um so like this kind of messed me up in a way but um because like I'm single and I do like a lot of sort of like uh one night stands and sort of friends with benefits kind of things um but there I had this really good experience when I was I was moving from Manila um was the last city I was in before Singapore and there was this one girl who i'd seen a couple times and like kind of had a nice connection with her and i knew that i wasn't going to see her again you know for maybe years or whatever and we had just really nice sort of intimate sort of like the tantra style like looking in each other's eyes and sort of slow yeah yep like not necessarily like you know slow motion the entire time but just taking your time and like really enjoying it us grown-ups call that making love oh beautiful i like it you mean not fucking yeah what i know right it freaks me out when it happens as well sometimes c does it to me without me knowing it's scary it's creepy yeah it is creepy she's a creepy chick she's a creepy chick so that's your favorite that would yeah that'd probably be like top of like that's the first thing that popped in my head um and that sort of like messed me up i mean probably probably in a good way but um like because for a while when i was here in singapore i was kind of looking for something like that and that actually takes a bit of time to develop uh so i was trying to sort of shoehorn one night stands into that and i think a lot of girls like you could do that you know it depends how quickly you can you can make a connection with somebody and open up um but i think most girls when they're having a one night stand or they're you know dating somebody like from tinder like it's like oh it's a guy from tinder it's not just a guy it's like oh this is a one night stand it's not a relationship and yeah they sort of limit the how far the relationship you know how far the relationship can go before it even starts because i think it's way into that or else you're setting yourself up for the point for yeah i think it's almost that that people feel that if you meet someone through Tinder or through even online dating, it's still got a stigma attached to it.
I know you just recently did a podcast on that. I have no problem with it. I think it's great. I mean, the world's opened up. It's a very flat world now in all senses of the word. But there's still a small stigma attached to it.
it's still well you know when somebody asks you when your parents ask where did you guys meet you know there's so many people who dodged that question when they met them online i mean we've got some of your swingers it's a little bit hard to explain to your parents like oh these are my swinger friends yeah well when when is the next time you'll be introducing our swinger friends to your parents? Oh, the wedding, you know. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. You actually meant that? Like, you didn't realize? Wow. No, I did not. Wow. Oh, shit. Wait, what's up? I'm left out of the loop here. Sorry.
We're getting married in September next year. Congratulations. And 60 or, I'm going to say 70% of the people are swingers. Okay. And the rest are... Relatives. Close relatives. So, what's the wedding night going to be like?
of the people are swingers okay and the rest are relatives close relatives so what's the what's the um the wedding night going to be like oh good question well because i'm not going to be in sydney for a while and quite frankly we talked about how much i want to fuck some of my friends in sydney um friends yeah some friends i know i know bitches they just give good head it's not my fault yeah well it's not going to be a making love type of no i don't think friends. Yeah, swing and friends. I know. I know, bitches. They just give good head. It's not my fault. Yeah, well.
It's not going to be a making love type of thing. No, I don't think so. Actually. Making memories, maybe. Wow. Or touching memories. What is on your fuck it list? I don't have a fuck it list. Have you run out of things to add to your fuck it list? Yeah one on the spot What's on your fucking list? Have you had sex with three ladies and one of them's in a clown suit? I don't know Three ladies, a donkey and a donkey in a clown suit I haven't done that Have you had three ladies sucking your cock at the one time? I haven't and yeah yeah, I guess, I mean, if you were like, would you like that?
Yes, I would go for that. Sorry, I don't have a list prepared. Yeah, that's okay. That's why we like to throw things at you at the last minute. Three ladies on your cock at one time. Spectacular visual. But frankly, one lady could do a much better job. Couldn't like one be on the balls, one on the nipples? Oh, no, I'm talking around penis. You just got to orchestrate them around. Here, come here, do this. You know, that's just three ladies. Yeah, I could orchestrate like ten ladies. One on each ear, kissing. My left ear lobe, my right ear lobe. My right ear lobe, yeah.
My right ear lobe, suck faster.
My left ear lobe, slow it down a it down a little um yeah you could orchestrate maybe i'm gonna say probably i could imagine a position for six women especially one one has to be somewhat um on your cock no not on my cock i mean how are they gonna fit on my cock this is what i'm thinking i mean you'd have to be galactal that silence was long enough so um let's see i was thinking about my fucking list so um probably what i would like to do is get more into going out to meet people um like going out to clubs and getting really good at picking up girls so that's like maybe a you know socially unacceptable you know like i'm talking about girls you need a wing girl yeah i'd rather i'd rather uh rely like i'd like to be able to go out by myself in like a city i don't know thank you no problem we're just uh we're just gonna top up some wine all right so you want to actually you're going to phuket soon right uh yeah southern krabi yeah well okay so Here's a little goal for you.
We want you to report back. Go out. Pick.
going to phuket soon right uh yeah southern krabi yeah well okay so here's a here's a little goal for you we want you to report back go out pick up a girl at a bar yeah naturally with conversation and everything i should try it you should do it with talking to a girl who talks to girls i know it's weird and look this is a little this is going to cause a bit of friction and freak some people out but he he's gonna do it he's up for the challenge yeah i'll definitely do it um like i've i've done it before uh it's just like i usually do online which is just simpler and i can run my copy paste game shit yeah which gets really boring but uh you know it's like effective and it works and you sort of like like you know i was complaining about the tinder like stereotype that you get pegged into but that's also an advantage because you can sort of go sexual a little bit more you can yeah you can go early yeah sort of like they know what to expect so you don't i'm gonna say in the most spectacular fashion you don't waste your night on trying to make somebody feel special when realistically you know and we've all had this we've all had times where we just want to get laid right so you don't waste or waste your night on on chatting and you know building that rapport that you would normally use further down the track if you were going to a relationship i mean if you're not going to do that if you're not interested in a relationship then you just want to get your sex on, then, you know, you go straight into that from Tinder.
I agree with you. Not that I've ever had a Tinder date. You're on Tinder. So are you. Yeah. So what? Well, it was not Tid for Tad, I was saying. Yeah. Neither of us have had a Tinder date. Apparently, I'm hideous and you're picky. That's everything guys and girls on Tinder. Exactly. Guys are ugly and girls are picky. Girls are picky. That's the world of Tinder, I think, isn't it? No, swiping. I don't even remember which way to swipe anymore. Well, we're on Thrender as well. No, we're not on Thrender. It's not Thrender anymore. You need to take that back because it's copyright problems.
There's a whole world of issues. It's called Field now. In the field. You're on Field. You're actually, we linked up with you on Field. Yeah, like one of the first messages. I was like, where did you guys meet swingers? And yeah, I popped on there. Yeah. Yeah. And I found him because he's one of the few single guys in Singapore. Yeah.
So one thing I want to say say like the reason i want to go out and pick up girls is not so that i can like have more sex because i think online is the best way to get a lot of sex but like the reason i like going out is because it like builds muscles um like social muscles you know it's very hard and it's like really difficult you know you have to like face social rejection and you have to kind of like figure out how to navigate groups Thank you.
muscles um like social muscles you know it's very hard and it's like really difficult you know you have to like face social rejection and you have to kind of like figure out how to navigate groups and group dynamics and all that kind of stuff and that's something that i would personally like to work on and you know i could like go off and join a speaking course or something like that but i'd be like fuck that i'm just gonna sleep in but if it's like i'm really horny and the only way i can get all this personal development shit out of the way is to like you know learn it then i'll you know it's a good it's a good incentive you've just actually sorry you were about to say the same thing as me i can tell you've just described the world of swinging because you have to you it's the same thing right but now it's worse because it's a couple you've got a couple over there who potentially one may be interested yeah one may be super interested one may not be interested at all or one may be super hot and one may be not super hot and you've got to you've got to balance that that and it becomes a four-way challenge rather than just a two-way challenge and it can be so tricky and there's so many swingers all the swingers we've ever spoken to the steps to to get to talk to somebody is quite difficult but then the steps to go from hey we're friends and we're enjoying your company now we'd like to take you upstairs and fuck you that step that that transition is so difficult with four people because i mean men typically are a little more forward than women typically that's not always the case in the sweet i have a cock shot on my phone this afternoon from having a couple of messages from one guy yeah but but the cock shot's normally number two message number one message normally for you you're not gonna argue with that are you but but um you know it's it's men are typically a little more forward right um but or it's more acceptable yes maybe in the swinger community it's different well no the the issue is with with um with that is you're not talking in four-way dynamic right so not only will you potentially offend your partner you may potentially offend the other partner we're looking at what are are we looking at it's a cock shot oh okay yeah that's definitely a dick dick on the phone that's a that's me there's a lot of good shit on your phone i've seen that i've seen that oh oh that's the pool we had sex in anyway everyone watching the podcast is like what the fuck yeah no uh c is currently so anyone check out pics on the phone no hang on so what i'm saying here right now is that most of the people that listen to this podcast have probably seen most of those photos oh okay mainly because it'll be like the one with this and this yeah yeah i know that yeah press the red button mr jones press the red button oh come on so uh yeah so it can the four-way dynamic makes it even more difficult you can totally eat that biscuit you've been sitting on that biscuit for the last 45 minutes it's fine i mean this is not a professional establishment all right guys there's going to be slight crunching i'm sorry yeah um so one of the things we it's like a smith it's like a smith's chips episode over here you know like an ad um one of the questions that that came to us was uh so you appear to be i mean our first impressions of you and we've met up once before now so basically we're best friends we're Yeahes um so but we've kind of picked some vibes from you as you do with new people right one of them is that you you appear to be somewhat control oriented control based like a control like a i'm not going to say control freak i'm not going to say control freak because that's what c is what.
That's what I was... Well, hey! What you are. I was calling you that. Yeah. So that being the case, you know, I'm going to use your term, quite a cerebral person. Given that you're quite cerebral, how do you help women and how do you entice women to let go of that, you know, the cerebralness?
because I mean seriously if i'm ever going to get this girl to squirt i need her to stop thinking about fucking marketing yeah um i think it's it's uh so like i have a guy like everything relates to game you know like kind of picking up girls and like you know relationships and stuff i have a guy who's just a natural, right? So when he gives tips to me, they amount to like, be cool, be cool, bro. Just be cool. Just be yourself. It's like, you know, you're probably right in like a Zen monk kind of way. Yeah, when you're talking to another Zen monk. Yeah, but yeah, it's not useful. Yeah.
So like somebody who uh like broken their legs and learn how to like you know run that person can actually sit down with somebody who has broken their legs and and teach them how to run so i think because i'm a little bit socially awkward like growing up i was more introverted and stuff so what the fuck i'm gonna i'm gonna call bullshit totally bullshit You've got game, dude That's sweet of you to say No, no. I mean, coming from a man who has no game, believe me. I've got game. Sometimes I do. Are you kidding me? Sometimes I do.
Okay, to quote a couple, podcast couple, I think it was that couple, no, it was actually... TNA. TNA from that careers couple that you make her laugh so hard that her underpants fall off. I think it was panties which sounds a lot more sexy. Panties kind of sounds so dirty. It's weird. Underpants gnomes. All I hear when I hear underpants I hear underpants gnomes. Which are those little gnomes that stole all your underpants when you were a kid. Can I also say panties versus lingerie? Panties. How much dirtier does panties sound? It sounds sort of slutty dirty which is a good kind of dirty.
Panties is a little too elegant. People are like I'm taking my panties off I'm like oh sploosh. She likes panties apparently. Who doesn't like panties? Well she doesn't wear panties. Yeah? And special occasions do. Yeah, special occasions you wear underwear. Special occasions. You mean like you don't wear anything? Generally not. Okay, like even at work, you don't wear underwear? Nothing? No. High five. I don't wear underwear either. Neither do I! Fuck yeah! Woo! It's trapping the man. It's keeping the man down. Oh my God, no.
I used to quite enjoy saying to my employees at work, sexual harassment, total sexual harassment claim here, but they'd be walking and I'd say, you know, there's only a fine layer of cotton between you and my penis. Nice. This is like as you're filling up your water. Exactly.
bubble over from the bubble and you're like you know as i do the arch back you know you arch your back and just get the buns up a little i have a question it's not on my list but i'm gonna throw it out there whoa so you whoa did everybody hear that c is currently going off list this could go anywhere go no do you um so you are in a more of a sexually experimental environment and industry i would kind of say how do you think that people perceive swingers or people that are in the lifestyle so you're meeting women who are coming to you to explore their sexuality guys who are coming to you to explore how they can be performing better with their partner and more sexual with their partner but how do you feel that the lifestyle and swingers are perceived in all of that like what's your take um i think there's definitely a stigma uh to like swinging and i think the the younger people in like early 20s they're probably not gonna like go to a swingers party but they might go to like a sex party or just like go to a party and stuff happens but if they hear like it's it's swingers they might be like oh okay that's sort of like you know so it's the term rather than that so I mean we had concerns about this as well that it was maybe an aged term in terms of just the term the word swingers that maybe it's an age term c is currently getting down our um our bowl of keys which we found here in singapore which you take this is old school yeah this is really old school and singapore is old school but you open the key and it has sexual well i mean singaporean as sexual as it gets um it's funny because it's a it's a piss take on keys in a bowl yeah okay yeah there's like little keys and you open up there's a note and then it's like yeah i've been through 90 of those and there is really nothing on there that there's nothing i was actually thinking of getting some liquid paper and sort of liquid papering out those and putting some decent things on there?
All the keys are going to be like, lick my balls for like two hours. I'm going to be like, why are all these keys the same? What is the sluttiest thing you've ever done? Sluttiest thing you've ever done? This is straight from the bowl, people. Sluttiest. Let's see. I think I've had sex with like i don't know three girls in one day like not not in like a swinging kind of thing but just like lined up all the dates that was in philippines right uh may have been the last couple weeks it was like yeah i've had like a couple porn Really?
Where it's like, I fuck two girls and then it's like two clients and then teach a class and then the next morning it's, you know. God damn. Tell us about it. What positions, what was happening? What's the good stuff? There's a lot of stuff going on. Yeah, but people, people listen to us, you know, they don't, believe me, it's not the witty banter. It's totally the dad jokes.
So you asking what are my favorite sex positions oh yeah that's a good way that's boring what's the nastiest thing you've done in the last three weeks of a girl let's see nastiest should i fill the gap here for you a little while just to help you um gather your thoughts i think i've got one so it'd be like uh she's giving me a blowjob and then i just like pulled out my phone and started like video recording it it's like uh it's like the second time i've seen her and she doesn't i mean has no reason to really trust me and then i just kind of go through like fucking her and then yeah like it's like a 15 minute clip so um question next question follow on follow on question from that why the fuck have we not seen this video yet it's on my phone he's a gentleman sweetheart oh he's a gentleman he flips out his phone i mean he may be he might as well be pokemon going over the over the top of the girl maybe there's a pic it might be a oh my there's a pick There might be a Pikachu on her head.
He's trying to capture the Pikachu. That would be funny. In fact, we know somebody who had nearly that happen. Yeah, that's a different story. Yeah. You know who you are. All right. So that's the sluttiest thing? Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty, yeah. Yeah, that's pretty out there.
there yeah like just sort of straight up recording somebody when you don't know them that one yeah recently he was having sex with me from behind and i was giving head to another guy but sure it's all about perspective isn't it probably kill him no i don't want to say that because he was already joking about me recently getting pretty violent in a podcast you are violent though i was knifing it's not that depends what you knife i mean people cut their fingers all the time i'm sure that was what you were referring to yeah totally accidental paper cuts yeah accidental jugular cut i didn't mean it it just happened i was just trying to make it cut a smiley face just under your smile so you you travel a lot so when you travel do you offer your services in international actually offer your services via skype um newsletter like what are you doing before you answer that can i ask it i mean just to to put some back end to this right people may notice that this is not a singaporean accent on the other other end of the microphone oh yeah i'm a white guy yeah yeah oh yeah i mean you're you're about as white as i come i'm pretty yeah blonde blonde hair i have a ginger beard you have a ginger beard yeah blonde hair blue eyes i mean you're as white as i come blonde.
I mean, you know, not yet seen pubic hair. Nice eyebrows. Thank you. So. That's my Tinder pickup line. Yeah. You can use it, but just beware it is lethal. Hey, nice eyebrows, girl, zero punctuation. Capitalized H. I've tried lowercase h, it's a little too triard. Because you actually have to push the button to do the lowercase h. So they know that you don't give a shit, but you do give a shit. So your history, your family history, you're obviously an American accent.
But just so people understand that you're a somewhat international citizen yeah uh so i spent uh like five years in the states when i was when i was growing up and then five years in tokyo and then 10 years in singapore and then after that uh studied in university and did a lot of study abroad so i've been in like so since then i've lived in hong kong lived in malaysia philippines thailand uh probably missing something something else so you're a world slut not just a slut so all right you're just showing me you're just showing me random dirty photos to try to up or up dirty me i'd love a wine yeah so like um so i was married before yes so i was married from when i was 22 until 25 and then i got so that was typical american american length of marriage yeah yeah this is like bible belt kind of like my parents where from where come on well like my uh georgia was where i went to university so i think i have a little bit of influence from there but so you know a bit of peaches peaches well peaches is it or plums peaches i don't know george's peaches yeah george's peaches um but so i was married when i was 25 sorry 22 until i was 25 and that was the first girl i had sex with so that was i just oh wow it's ridiculous right so i just like you know got into it sort of like the puritanical kind of thing like oh i guess i need to get married now and i can't really like i had really low yeah 22 so i was 21 sorry i'm just gonna just 22 first time you've had sex and now and now you're now i was 21 now you're mr hunk hand squirt master i mean you're touching sexy women yeah but like what did you expect isn't that like the normal thing exactly you've over haven't you?
You're now playing catch-up. I have a great question. We've already asked a question that has not yet been answered. I don't care. Wiping the question. How do you think a woman would go trying to teach other women? If I was doing what you're doing, if I was massaging... Straight up, I'm going to say, your fingernails are too long.
I would would trim them how would i go um i've had some girls who have like gotten yoni massages by other people so i had this one girl who uh she was from southeast asia i don't want to like say specifically because you know but so from southeast asia and she was in the uk and bali and she's tried them with women and then she tried it with me and she has like cancer she had like blood cancer or something so it was sort of like this way to help sort of like her circulation it was an alternative treatment you know like you know who knows if that actually worked but it said she said it worked for her she had a good time but she was always with women and then with me i think there was more of that sort of sexual polarity thing going on.
It wasn't so much like, oh, I'm going to do this now, I'm going to do that now. It was more like, you know, a little more like oomph behind what was going on. Also, there's a bit more strength to it, right? I mean, don't get me wrong. You and I are both not big guys. We're not huge, strong. You know, it's not that you have – actually, your forearms are bigger than I just looked at them now. Certainly, your right forearm is bigger than your left. It's a little bit.
strong you know it's not that you have four you don't actually your forearms are bigger than than i just looked at them now they are certainly your right forearm is bigger than your left it's at least three times as big so um you know we're not huge guys but um there's more there's still more strength generally to a guy generally again gross generalization welcome to the world of of listening to our podcast our podcast. So I would expect that a lady would struggle more to give the same sort of... From what I've seen, even of your videos, it's quite a...
I'm not going to say aggressive, but certainly an assertive structure to get people to actually squirt. I think it's mental.
Think about the fact that when that when we're in desire we both had women and our friends had a guy messaging her and a girl messaging you him yeah and I think it's also a mental thing so you can't let go with another woman yeah it's like who's gonna slut shame a more is it going to be a guy or a girl it's usually a girl there's usually a lot of yeah absolutely gender you know like shit going on can i say that the 45 liters of flavored lubricant probably didn't help okay brings me to another point so you make your lube no no wait a second we. We're going back. It's coming.
We're going back to the original question of 10%. Okay, sorry. L swing – sorry. Sorry, Jay. Okay, from Average Swingers, Daryl just flicked me in the arm and that shit hurt. And also, we're not going to bring that to the Dallas Swingers Club, so everyone just calm down. Or the New Orleans.
So we may bring it to the New nondon from this particular swingers club the dallas swingers club no they're new orleans swingers club because uh because c uh c likes to walk around and just swingers are in the middle of fucking else yeah you've seen the mustache now um she right and now you understand why we're not allowed into swingers clubs it's like is that is that c and then and i'm like yes and they're like okay you guys aren't allowed in here anyway wow i actually nearly drew blood um the reason c the reason we went back to your history is because i wanted, well, C wanted to ask, do you do global events?
You know, do you, do you do, you know, if you, let's say we could gather a group of our friends or swingers in the U S or UK or somebody's listening who wants to learn. Yeah. Do you do events like that? Uh, haven't like for now, I'm kind of focusing on Singapore, trying to kind of figure out exactly what the market wants and how I can present myself to reach everybody and sort of what education I need to do to get people in the right mind space to actually open up and try this kind of thing.
So I'm focusing on Singapore so that I can later take what works really well and then apply that to more countries.
So right now, I focused on singapore it's amazing you actually like you're really thinking about this i mean i'd just be thinking about the vaginas i'm playing with but that's just me if one of the couples that are listening to this say wanted to have a skype session with you could they message you would you be open to talking to them yeah sure sure i could give that i've never tried a skype session before so that would be very interesting um in the future i want to make a i'm happy to Thank you. I've never tried a Skype session before, so that would be very interesting.
In the future, I want to make a... I'm happy to provide C as a model. No, actually, I'm thinking Mrs. Jones from We Got a Thing. Oh, yeah. Can we do it? Can we set it up? International Skype squirting scenario. God, we... Can we do something like that? Yeah. Who would be the model? C.
C would be the model interesting she's never squirted so you've got a straight up fucking challenge there buddy if you haven't squirted to be like on skype like at an arranged time and people watching you like can i say that i mean there was an invitation you know i mean we're she's looking at me all nervously now i'm still legitimately thinking how am i going to get out of my own head yeah how's he gonna feel bad you're already you're already in his head you know my god you're outside of your own in just clean it up in there no i mean that's that's a problem that a lot of girls have When they have sex A lot of times they're thinking Girls are a little bit more nurturing A little bit more giving in general But they'll be A little bit more empathetic And in the person's head Figuring out what are they thinking What should I do next What do they want That really that really gets in the way of their own orgasms does it just every single time i go down on another lady yeah that's your thoughts am i doing this right yeah yeah i mean there's some training like we need to do some training there for you need to find a lady who's willing to come to singapore Anyone in Australia there might be interested in going down.
Starts with an S. Might be interested in North Sydney. Yeah. Might be interested in going down on sea for like two hours and training her. Two hours. It's been a while. It's going to be like three days. So, yes, you're open to that. So you went on to the next question, which we were interested in because I see you make your own loop. Yep. Oil. Easy. Yeah. So, I mean, I'm not going to ask you what goes in there, but I notice that you do – It's not KFC's secret recipe, honey. Well, no, but look, there's – It's not secret anymore, actually. It just came out. Yeah. KFC, it's out. Is it?
If you don't know, Google it. It's out. KFC's recipe's out? It's out. Oh, man, It just came out. Yeah. KFC, it's out. Is it? If you don't know, Google it. It's out. KFC's recipe's out? It's out. Oh, man, that's horrible. Like a week ago. Imagine if you were the KKK colonel. Okay. What? He was a member of the KKK. You didn't know that? He is. That's so bad. I didn't know that. He shouldn't. I don't even. What? I'd say we're going to edit that out. He wore a big white sperm suit.
No, so you make your own lube yep why because if you just go to the store and buy it it's like the pre-mixed stuff is expensive and like if i just make it myself it's cheaper plus i can get exactly what i want so i do very simple uh basically oil there's like a carrier oil which is the base stuff good for that is coconut almond and like processed olive processed olive oil so it doesn't smell like olives it's just so not extra virgin yeah not extra virgin oh that's a real shame because it'd be really nice to pour extra virgin over overseas you could if you want me trying to take me back back to when i was quite young oh wow so i have a question though so you know we've already we're we're in the midst of question real quick i'll answer your question so you got the the i use um i use almond and uh and olive mixed together and then i use a little bit of either lemongrass or lavender so just a couple of drops and then i also add gold flake to it to sort of just make it a little bit more indulgent for the girl that's really more of a psychological thing than anything else yeah so how much lube is the good or perfect amount of lube is it varying from woman to woman i mean do you have a i guess a what's the lube to vagina ratio yeah yeah um i mean when i start out you know i start out with like the back and then i do the legs and then go down to the butt so that's you don't have to use as much um just because you're you know you're just trying to make it so that your hands don't catch and it's nice and smooth and like the number one thing about essential massage is the fluidity and uh sort of in the moment and, like, connecting with the person.
So if your hand is catching, then the fluidity is gone. Yeah. So just enough. But then once you get down to the vaginal region, like, you can't have enough. Just the more the merrier. Oh, yeah. All right. Objection. Objection. If the court will please. This is where we went wrong with the desire pod. This is where they went wrong, sweetie. Friction. I'm going to say friction. Was it oil or was it a... It was actually... This led on to a really embarrassing... Probably the most embarrassing moment of my swinger career lifestyle. I'm not sure it's a career.
I mean, if you can make a make a career at it i'm in they had fragrance um fragrant oil and they used a lot no no it was fragrance and flavored yeah so that creates growth bacterial growth let's say fungal fungal style growth i'm gonna say fungal i'm not happy with the word fungal to we're already at fungal just bring it up you know how i am with editing it's at fungal oh shit so they used a lot and it actually that plus the pool plus some play in um in desire ended in a very embarrassing um i'm gonna say frosty experiment experience yeah yeah so do you have any kind of like do women ever come to you and say i'm allergic to this or i'm not okay with this can you change it up or yeah i mean i've had some people who are like i just don't like lemongrass so use something else please that's that's cool okay um but haven't had anybody who was like you know nut allergies or anything like that so that.
So. Ooh, nut allergies. That's interesting. I mean, I use almonds. Yeah. So it's not really, it's not a relative to the peanut. So it shouldn't be a problem. Oh, okay. All right. Well, I would have, I would have aborted on that one, but okay. Yeah. That's a good, I would probably use something else just to be safe. Yeah. No, well almond, almond's not a relative to peanut, so isn't a relative, so it shouldn't be a problem. All right, cool. Wow, look at me nerding it up. I'll have to Google that one. No, no, absolutely.
Well, an almond grows, I mean, seriously, an almond grows on a tree, a peanut grows underground. Yeah, I mean.
So, female body shape and in any Audi, you've had an experience of all of them you've had mainly kind of like outies i mean yeah so like the iny outie thing we just were talking about it today i didn't know that was like a distinct thing i just thought that like vaginas were different i didn't know that there were like two distinct categories oh look i think there's a lot more than two i mean it's i don't think there's two distinct categories realistically you know i think that's probably us really it's our conversation that's led to one vagina babe not two just do what about your she's she's bad sometimes what about your sometimes she's good yeah what about your bum gina oh my god so lame but if so if you go up to people and you're like any outie vagina well they sort of understand what you mean yeah i think so yes real quick because i know we're kind of you know it's fun nearing the time but we went to a swingers party we walked he's killing himself laughing because he remembers i know exactly where this is And we met a couple, and the first thing the guy says to us...
And this is literally the first thing. Literally the first thing out of his mouth. Not even like, hey, you guys look really attractive. He says, hey, have you seen my wife's oversized clitoris? Here's her clitoris. And he then lifts her skirt up. And it's the size of my thumb. It's like, so it's a three-inch clitoris, right? Now, can I say, would that freak me out in the midst of play? Probably not. But it was more the fact that he didn't, there was no precursor to this. It was just, look at my wife's big clit. So for me... Yeah, like his gimmick. Yeah.
It's like, I'm not confident to talk to anybody. Of anything else. Yeah.
I'm just showing my wife's big clit and yeah and what i asked her actually my second question was like that's great how do you go with using vibrators on that is it more sensitive especially being your clitoral orgasmer generally that would be um that would be your concern i'd assume it's like the nerves are spread out so it's a little bit more desensitized yeah her response was it's not a problem basically yeah of course i mean kind of like big boobs like little boobs are more sensitive generally because all the nerves are what questions do you have for us let's do that no hang No, hang on.
We haven't ever had. No. No, it's not. Okay. Okay. I didn't prepare questions. On the spot. Chainsaw. What power are your glasses? And if they're different in the left and right, I want to know. Well, they are, actually. Well, let's go into that. Oh, my God. Tell me all about. Jesus. Can somebody... I actually want somebody to use a glass on me right now. Are you a stronger in the left or the right? This is actually a really good point though that you make. I know you're taking the piss, but. I'm not taking any piss. No. I want to know. There's a reason he knows.
Eyes of the window to the soul. Go ahead. Negative 2.75, negative 2.5. Any astigmatism? Oh my God. I had an operation when I was four and I had a lazy eye. Hang on. I mean, do you know vaginas or eyes? I mean, this is, this is getting freaky. There's a direct correlation. What, your vagina is directly attached to your eyes? Maybe.
Do you have a blue vagina because your eyes are blue okay so back to hunky what were you handsy sorry what was your um you were going somewhere with that oh no i just don't have a list of questions perfect i mean this is this is actually this fits our standard podcast. Absolutely no idea where you're going. You're just asking random questions. You do look better with glasses on, in my opinion, but that's just my small opinion. That's where I was going with that. He likes me in glasses when we go on dates. I like to wear contacts. Also, another reason is just quite frankly. Yeah, yeah.
You're bobbing your head. You're bobbing your head. Your glasses tend to fall off. Yeah. That could look kind of hot, actually. Even from behind or whatever, if there's vigorous activity happening, glasses tend to fall off. Yeah, but people like the sexy secretary. Yeah. People really... I mean, I'm going to throw a limb out there. It doesn't matter whether you can see anything or they're fogged up. They don't fucking care. This is my problem. They do not care.
You fucking care they do not care to look hot yeah and can i say the even better thing is just a little bit of um a little bit of like cum on the glasses is that i mean that yeah that's a thing for me but anyway there was uh there was a lot going on here in the eyes i'm glad we talked yeah wow i mean that was a really insightful question we should get you on more often just so you can ask insightful questions about these eyes um so i'm gonna ask next for you next for hunk hands next for the next for the hunk hands uh international skype sex ambassador like what are you doing what's what what's what's on my yeah so what's...
Yeah, so what's the future of your business? You know, like, Hunk Hands is, it's a business for you. Singapore first, then what? We're going to take over the world? Yeah, so when I first started, I was just doing it for girls, right? So just purely me, girl, massage, done. And then I would, you know, rinse, repeat, do that, right? I'm hoping there's a bit more of a wash, repeat. I would use soap and then I would repeat. So, okay. So my initial plan was that I would have like an agency. So I'd find guys who are kind of like me who want to do this kind of thing.
And then I would help them out with the marketing and all that kind of stuff because that's probably my strong suit. So I was like, you know, I can just find guys and then we can like, you know, I'll take 50% and then I'll give you all the clients. You don't have to worry about it. You just like drop off your bag. It gets laundered, blah. You know, you just have to worry about your clients. Easy, easy. But like those people don't exist. I found out.
Look, can I i say and all the people who've contacted us over the last few weeks since we initially introduced you to our podcast you don't know about because you don't follow twitter no podcast you listen to our podcast twitter is not cool twitter is cool get me on snapchat oh my god you are you're so 21st century right now. Oh, my God. So most swingers, though, are above the age of 18, so they don't use Snapchat. I have no idea what's going on on Snapchat. It's a complete shit show. I have no idea what's happening. Yeah.
So we've had so many of our friends contact us and say my god has how did my student guidance counselor not tell me that this was an option in terms of my career and so i reckon we've probably got the hookup in terms of a few people who'd love to learn how to do this i mean i know there's some there are some don't get me wrong i mean you're you're an expert at what you do there's certainly some other people out there who also know how to do it otherwise it wouldn't be as as such a large craze as what it is um but i reckon i reckon there's a lot of people out there i honestly do in the lifestyle um the ability to squirt seems to be a thing.
I've been trying to interject for a while now. Yeah, there's been a whole lot of finger twirling. Squirting is like the new trend. It is. Squirting has become the new I'm bisexual in the lifestyle. And if you don't squirt or you don't know how to or you haven't experienced it, it's a bit of a... Oh, I wouldn't say that. It's not that... There's nothing that's... There is so much pressure. Oh, fuck. So it's kind of an expectation? Not at all. It's kind of like waxing might have been an expectation before. No. No.
I could honestly go into our Twitter feed right now and show you multiple people and it's all about squirting. Yeah, but that's more just because it's a newer development. It's a newer development in terms of the lifestyle or in terms of Thank you. Thank you. Bye- whoa. Yeah, it's a big word.
We don't use words any bigger than marmal this on this podcast and you've gone well over marmalade with demonstrable so like it's uh demonstrate like so you know when girls come like even if you know i'm like i do this i'm gonna say it's visual it's a full time just i'm just gonna shrink it down for you um don't know what you said it's keep going um i like him i like him he's yep continue so like uh i'll be with girls and i don't really know if they came or if they came local times and i'll ask them afterwards to sort of calibrate but when you squirt you you can tell you can see it so a guy gets that satisfaction that actually that loads a question for me though um because i know there are some women out there who don't come when they squirt.
Yeah, definitely. So, as people...
that loads a question for me though um because i know there are some women out there who don't come when that when they squirt yeah definitely so i so it's it's i'm going to say it's a lot more um the percentage percentage wise it's a lot higher that they would be um they would be squirting and coming at the same time so i can understand where you come where you are i keep saying coming there's a lot of coming involved in this conversation um yeah there's i understand exactly what your point of view is um but i certainly believe there's women out there who don't come actually in fact we know i know i know a girl who who it's a it's a it's more of a show for her than it is an exciting process.
You know what I mean? Yeah. But like for the guy, if you just have never gotten that visual like confirmation or just any sort of confirmation, like I'm a hundred percent sure she's, she actually had an orgasm or she squirted or something like that. Yeah.
Just to like have that sort of certainty in one type of sexual act is sort of, uh, you know, like kind of strokes where you go it's kind of hot too right like for a woman if you are giving head to a guy and he's having a great time you know and you know he just explodes i mean that's almost like um a reward in a sense right like women love like a guy coming i mean. And if he doesn't, if he's like, oh, I'm going to save it. Well, no, we've had couples in the past. We've had couples in the past where the guy is not allowed to come. Yeah. Right? And that really doesn't work for you.
Nor should it. I'm in this act for a multiple and sensual pleasure. I want myself to come. I want him to come. I want you to come. Her to come. God, I want the person staring through the window that's looking and then hearing in. You want the pile of people. I don't know.
want myself to come i want him to come i want you to come her to come god i want the person staring through the window that's looking you want the pile of people yeah people to have a good time and explore their sexuality yeah i think it's like it's an unambiguous like you know you're hot right it's like yeah like you're doing something right you're doing something right whether it's not like they're just telling you it's like you can't lie if a guy comes all over you. I agree. Yeah, I understand what you're saying, yeah. I mean, that goes back to, I mentioned before, the come on the glasses.
You know, there's an image there that comes along with it, yeah. I think, are we plumb out of questions? Are you done? We plumb out. We plumb out. Yeah? Unless you have any for us. No. No, he's already gone through. I mean, he knows the glasses. Staring at your eyes. Yeah, okay. I mean, we've got two sets of blue eyes here staring into each other. I'm pretty sure this is how you start, like, an apocalypse or maybe a black hole. It's not our fault we're so damn attractive, right? Actually, I'm looking across the table right now, and I'm seeing a perfect American couple, blue eyes, blonde hair.
good lord um what i'm gonna do is i'm gonna y'all but i like pancakes i'm gonna take my really dark what the hell are you talking about i'm gonna take my really dark really dark brown eyes and um you know your mysteriously dark brown eyes i'm gonna say handsomely dark brown eyes and, you know. Your mysteriously dark brown eyes. I'm going to say handsomely dark brown eyes. That's just me, though, judging by the silence. Before we leave, though, before we leave, we have some friends that podcast. And she has the sexiest voice in podcast. Okay. And he has the sexiest cock in podcast.
my god so we'd like you to little say a little hello to um mr and mrs jones the sexiest voice say that in your sexiest voice hello hi mrs jones and mr and mrs hi mr and mrs Jones. I would like you to have a great evening together. I'm going to take that away now, that sploosh. Just vetoing that little podcast. Okay. So, thank you very much. We'll hug you back. Sure thing. Hansy. Stop it. Mr. Hunk Hans. Actually, we didn't ever ask whether you were okay with having your name on the podcast because you're, anyway. Like my actual. Yeah, your actual. Yeah.
I'm kind of keeping my faces out there, but I'm kind of keeping the name. Yeah, fair enough. I mean, everyone knows us as C&D. Break down the barriers, ladies. You might get the real name. Oh, wow. It takes like one text. text it's really easy it's my comfort building reply so i'm pretty easy so surprisingly it's actually quite difficult to um you know you gotta work for it ladies so www.hunkhands.com so where else can we find you beside your website is there anywhere else i mean i know you've got a streets of singapore there's a whatsapp on your website Thank you.
dot hunkhands.com so where else can we find you beside your website is there anywhere else i mean i know you've got a streets of singapore there's a whatsapp on your website is that something that you're happy to throw out there yeah hunkhands is probably the best way to go uh i've also got that podcast that's sex darb singapore so we talk about like singapore related stuff i don't know if you know yeah no we haven't in singapore you probably wouldn't care yeah we haven't um we haven't plugged your podcast yet, only because you're still fairly low in the numbers, and we tend to like people to grow a little more.
I don't have a randomly allocated number like somebody. Like 10, Jay. Like 10, yeah. We tend to just, because the unfortunate thing for us is, certainly for me, is that I've followed some podcasts in the past only to find they disappear which was really aggravating so um so we will certainly throw your name out there once you get further into it throughout the website so keep keep abreast of that if you actually want to know and i'm assuming that there's a potential to have a little skype session sure can it? Well, you're totally throwing your cat out there.
Stop throwing your pussy at everyone. Yeah, yeah. So anywhere else we can find you? That's the best place, hunkhands.com. Hunkhands.com. It's fairly simple and really quite self-explanatory, I think. Thank you. And that's how I found Mr.
Hunkhands, I might add.unk hands i might add hansy i'm so gonna just correct you there sorry that's how c found oh god yeah that's the truth so um for now thank you very much for listening in and um this has been an episode about squirting and you know where to find us i'm sure massage and yoni massage yep yoni massage yoni yoni and can i say we still owe you guys a um a bit of a download on the single guy yeah we did catch up with our manicorn last weekend yeah that's manicorn mr adam manicorn which is a single guy in the lifestyle so we'll podcast about that soon.
But if you've got any questions, actually, for Hunk Hands, any questions about squirting, you know where to find us on Twitter. It's at Swing Down Under on Twitter. Ah, look, we'll just look. You know where we are. We'll put this stuff on the end of our conversation as usual. You know where we are and let's just finish this up this is c this is d and nice to meet you guys and this is swinging down under