P88 – Lifestyle Community

Transcript

you're listening to swinging down under podcast about the swinging non-monogamous lifestyle from two crazy australians with over four years of lifestyle antics to keep you entertained informed angry happy and horny join our international swinging adventures and welcome i I'm C, crazy female Australian sheila and believer of all things love, balance and sexy times. And this is Dee. I'll be doing my best to keep the dad jokes to a minimum, which is probably going to be highly unlikely. Along with that, I'll keep C and check where I can. Did I mention I'm a pilot?

We'll be your podcast host for today, so sit back and enjoy the sweet, sweet melodies. Hey everyone, and welcome to episode 88, Swinging Down Under. Welcome back if you are joining us. Or Stardate 100. It's Stardate 100. It's going backwards. You realize that, right? No, this is now Stardate 100. This is like the best ever podcast. Oh, okay. All right. Awesome. Well, hey, if you have joined us before, welcome back. And if this is your first time joining us, welcome, extra welcome. Yes, welcome to Stardate 100. I mean, well done. You've managed to leap forward into time. Yeah, that's amazing.

We're going to talk… We don't use numbers here anymore. We don't use numbers? No. We're going to start with… Oh, welcome to episode A. No. Yeah, that's what I'm going to do now. Today's episode is all about the lifestyle community. I'm just going to roll past you. Today's episode is all about the lifestyle community. We want to talk about what the lifestyle community is, what it means, how do you define it, how do you define community. And we actually rolled in some of our fellow podcasters to help us out with that because, you know, crowdsourcing, right, it's fun, yeah?

Plus we're also not the be-all and end-all of understanding the community because it is different things to different folks. Exactly correct. Thank you very much, Dee. Well, well added. Did I just segue you to something?

Well added, actually, because that is one of the reasons why we have enjoyed so many people to come along today is because of the fact that we wanted to get diversity here because it does mean as you say different things to different people and everybody has so many different uh opinions on it so you know it's quite amazing is this is the first time i've managed to segue to something rather than away from something you're segwaying away from stuff now though i'm trying congratulations well i've now have to top up my segways away because i've been segwaying too so i'll have to do at least two more now right so before we get into the community section though we have a few things to talk about thank you to our new patreon john cheers john thanks for joining us thank you john we have a couple of questions we're going to get to and then we're going to talk about community and then roll into the other podcasters why do i have a huge purple cock in front of me you have a huge purple cock in front of you because we were chatting to some canadian friends last night okay some canucks so we have a few uh instagram questions that came in d are you ready for these just two just two nice and easy ones yes all right so the first instagram question came in from drop bear underscore rider i mean let's just talk about that let's just talk about the handle for starters it's great we need to.

Okay, go. They exist. They don't exist. Drop bears exist. For everyone going to Australia, be careful. Drop bears are the angriest bears in the world. They look like koalas, but you can't spot them in the trees and then they drop on you. Like kind of around dusk, I think, is the primary drop bear, drop zone, drop time. Drop bear, drop zone, drop time? Yes. So be careful, drop bears. And they team up with hoop snakes. They team up with hoop snakes. So watch out for the hoop snakes as well. Google that for anybody out there listening. Google drop bears, Google hoop snakes.

It's actually some common piss-taking that we like to give foreigners when they come into the country because everybody's fucking scared of Australia. Like the amount of people that have said to us over the years... Asked how do we survive. How are you still alive, you know? You've lived to over 30 years old. Good for you guys. You guys must be superstars because they just assume Australia's going to kill you a bit. There's a simple way to deal with this. With all of the dangerous animals everywhere in the world. Preacher, how do you do it? I've used this in other countries as well.

I see a dangerous animal over there. Yep, check. You've got them in your eye. They're in your eye line, yep. I turn around and I run like fuck. And you run. Yes legs yes running away from them not in not towards them no don't go to away from them away from them is a way to go that's how you survived yes because toward would get you eaten by your average brown bear as well there you go so but uh you know and spiders also a lot of people are scared of spiders and snakes in australia you, snakes, run away from them again. Spiders, I mean, not exactly the fastest movement of critters.

What about cuddly penguins? What's your reaction to those ones? Oh, they make a great belt. I don't, no, I don't appreciate that at all. Drop Bear underscore Ryder. Drop Bear underscore Ryder would like to know, when are we coming to Canada to party? Canada. Yeah, that's what they want to know. When are we coming to Canada to party? Well, I suppose there's some good news there, right? Well, he specifically said Vancouver, but let's just say when are we coming to Canada to party. Good segue. Hey, Dee, how was your birthday, buddy? My birthday was all right.

I mean, my darling wife bought me a trip to Canada. Canada. So I'll be there. Unfortunately, C won't be because it's my fucking birthday. I can only afford one ticket. This is the best scam ever for her. She organizes tickets for me for my birthday. You like how I do that? And then... Reaping the motherfucking benefits. And then she comes along with me. I think there's a scam here. You just said you need somebody to download podcasts for you. I just assume you need somebody to carry your bags, you know, like get you through check-in.

Yeah, but I can get a cheaper rate than what you're offering. This is travel agent 24-7, five gold stars. Yeah, but you're not very cheap. I can hire somebody here local. Quality, okay, that's what I'm saying right now. Quality over quantity. I can get like two or three people for your rate. So, yes, we will be coming to Canada. Unfortunately, not until the end of 2020, though. So, we're not going to be there until October 2020, but we're coming. Finally. We've never been there before. There's a big, you know, big hole in our world map and there's no pins in Canada.

We've got to get some fucking pins up on the board. Yeah, we do. We've got, well, I mean, we're kind of missing most of Russia and I'm looking over my shoulder right now and also South America as well. So, I think, you know, there's a few other places we need to get to as well yes but canada we've done asia i mean fuck have we done asia oh my god actually kate's done asia a shitload of times how many asians have you just you've just been doing asia i've been doing asia okay the next one is i don't even know from uh amphithorib vaults amp the vaults that's's Amp the Volts, yes. Amp the Volts.

Yep, right. I actually think that's quite a nice pun as well. Kudos to the two Instagram followers. It's a bit engineering. For those of you who don't understand it, it's because you're not engineers. Awesome. Fucking hell. That's delightful. So he would like to know, you know, 60-year-old man, does that 60-year-old man have a chance getting into the lifestyle? What's your thoughts on that? And he's saying, you know, do we have a chance? I think that's one for you to answer, isn't it? I mean... I'll take it. I'll field this one then. You'll field this one?

Look, your limitations are only by your own personal barriers, buddy. So amp the vaults, get the fuck in there, turn it up. Turn it up to 11, apparently.

That's what what they say now the cool kids say that and uh and why are you saying it then because you didn't even know what it meant until i put it on a f***ing slide oh so yeah join in i mean the lifestyle as you'll hear in the next uh section about the community it is full of diversity it's full of different people from all around the world different cultures religious backgrounds size backgrounds, size, shape, body, age, whatever, you name it. So your economic background, it really doesn't matter. It really doesn't matter.

It is a true cross-section of the rest of the world from all ages and everything. So here's what I'm going to – amp the vaults. This is just for you. Don't listen to this, but amp the vaults. All right, just turn the volume up. Just dive in, man. Just do it, right? Have a crack. Have a crack. Have a fucking crack. Okay, good. Right, that's Instagram questions. And if you don't, I've got a big purple dick in front of me for you. You have a big purple dick. It's not my dick. My dick is not big and purple. I am not dick-hulking out right now. That'd be big and green.

You haven't tried to inject your dick with some other medicine that wasn't yours and then ended up with a purple dick. Don't do that. Don't do that. Hot tip, folks. Yeah. Let's take a quick break and then let's talk about the community. You ready? And we're back and with only one real problem here is that I'm about to run out of fucking blueberries. Oh, yeah. And I am really enjoying the blueberries I've got. For those of you out there who – I'm going to give this blueberry company a plug for no reason. They're not famous, but it's a product of Morocco, and they're called African Blue.

They're a bloody good blueberry. It even says so right in the packet. It says premium quality. I thought you were going to say, does it say bloody good blueberry in the packet? I was going to say, you fucking ripper. That says, wow, what just happened? That was some full Aussie right there. Wow, you have gone full Aussie. I've gone full Aussie. Did you just, oh, my God, I saw what just happened on your phone. What's that? You've looked up the definition of community on your phone. I have because I'm going to talk about it. Yep, yep, that's exactly it. Are we going to Webster's this?

We can Webster. Wow. I'm not sure what's happened here, folks.

I'm going to just shut down for a minute and see whether we can get her back to normal i'm on a high okay get her back to normal kate and then we woke up this morning you said hey let's let's um let's masturbate before we get out of bed and i was like cool had a shower you then did some laser hair removal on me we had some breakfast we did some shopping we came back we rode to the gym i've had a fucking great day i'm feeling great it's a it is a i mean the way you've just described it makes it sound like a lot of people are like wow that sounds shit sounds like did you clean the house and iron some shirts as well because man you guys are living the life we do have to iron some shirts that's why i put it in there i thought i just remind you give you a little thank you yeah you're welcome i gotta get high and then get you back down.

Right. So after our discussion, I just want to mention here that we are going to follow up this chat with audio snips from That Couple Next Door, Monogamish Marriage, Swinger Diary, Sex Uninterrupted, Tua Mototango, and We Got a Thing. Thank you so much, guys, for sending us in audio. I actually listened to a few of them before, but we haven't listened to them all because we wanted to put it all together and then listen as a couple. So a bit of a secret for us as well. So cheers, guys, for sending through that audio.

It is, so far from what I've heard, really, really interesting aspects and perspectives on what you think the community is all about. So let's get cracking. As Dee mentioned, listen, I've got a definition here, Dee. You ready for it? This big purple dick actually has an eye on it and veins. It does have an eye and veins. I'm now checking it out. This is really quite a big purple dick. Okay. Would you like to, you know, talk about the purple dick? Apparently that's – Well, I mean, the other thing is – Are you going to lead into the community topic? Do you reckon you could do that?

Well, I mean, community is like a big purple dick. Okay, yeah, yeah. It's big, it's round, it's firm, supportive. Yep. Sometimes there's a knob, sometimes you have to stroke the balls. I don't see how that's about the community. Of course it is. There's a knob in every community. Well, you did say that there's an I there and there is an I that exists in the word community. How does that sound? Yeah, but okay. That sounds all right?

Apparently there's no i there and i uh there there is an i that exists in the word community how's that sound yeah but okay that sounds all right apparently there's no foreskin in community community just had the old snip snip just looking at this is this called it's just called com now we're just calling it the lifestyle com ls com ls com yeah we've we've snipped it wow that's i mean i'm on fire yeah i know all right your jokes are awesome when you've like had a great day the definition of community a group oh wow you're actually gonna read it i'm gonna read it yeah the group of people i'm pretty sure i'm gonna interrupt you more than once i see you doing that yeah it's not annoying for anybody myself included a group of people living in the same place or having a particular character characteristic in common right that's the actual definition definition.

Well, I mean, that's from Google, though. You can't trust Google. I think you can. No, you can't. Yeah? No. Hey, Google, can we trust you? Earning and maintaining your trust is a priority at Google. Google protects your data and ensures you are in control. You can learn more about Google's... Okay, Google, stop now. I'm pretty sure that Google's going to kill us one day. She, I mean, that was. She terrifies me. Yeah, actually, apparently we can't trust Google. I don't, yeah. Well, what the fuck is, what are the robots going to actually tell us when they come and kill us all? Trust in us.

Robots are friends of mine, so it's all good. Okay. I'll help you out. I'll get the hookup. Oh, that's a good Butterfingers song. Daryl. Yes, Kate. Let's talk about the community, but let's backtrack it. When we first started looking into swinging, right, and then, you know, everybody kept saying these buzzwords, community, lifestyle, community, you know, all these sorts of things. What was – And now we're doing a whole podcast. And now we're doing a whole podcast. We're five years on where we've drunk the Kool-Aid. What did you think about it when we first started?

What was your thoughts on the matter when you heard this term, when you started going to clubs or joining Red Hot Pie or whatever dating sites? What was your thoughts? Roll it back in time. What a wank. You need a way back machine like Tone that can take us back, the time machine.

Anyway, no, I didn't think there was a community i thought people saying that out loud was kind of weird and um didn't really understand what this community was all about like you know what what do they do they support each other and getting laid that's that's basically what my mind slipped to okay which i mean don't get me. It's not a bad community to be involved in if they just support you in getting laid. I'd actually come to think of it, that's the reason I joined this fucking community because I figured it was a community that was going to support me in getting laid.

Hey, it does actually say that they have particular characteristics in common. Yeah, getting laid, apparently, characteristic. There you go, there you go.

Yeah, pretty happy with that with that um okay for me thinking back when we first started looking into this the idea of having a community was really um a bit perplexing to me i guess you grow up with a unit of friends at school you may have a unit of friends at high school and then you have one unit or two units of friends you have a couple does i have two parental units i mean what are you okay fine you got family, you know, all these sorts of things. And so the idea that I guess... Are there pet units as well? Like do we have a cat unit and a dog unit?

Well, some people are pro-dog and some people are pro-cat. I mean, you know, never the two shall meet, but... Well, no, I think they do occasionally. They do occasionally. Then the dog unit chases the cat unit down the road.

And then occasionally the cat unit skitters under a car the dog unit hits the side of the car before you know it the dog's like um you know shaking itself off because it's hit sorry i'm getting eyeballed here i'm in a parked car for those of you um who aren't like listening listening along with the story and then the dog gets up looks at you and drops one ear and is as cute as fuck so you have to give it some like chocolate hey remember when i was chocolate chocolate's bad for dogs remember back when i was um telling the people that may be tuning in for the first time you know extra welcome to the podcast you remember that d it was like i don't know 15 minutes and 15 23 minutes ago what do you reckon yes um sorry guys uh you thought you tuned into a swinging podcast what you actually tuned into was the ramblings of an insane man on a Sunday evening.

Welcome. Welcome and enjoy. Yes. And thankfully, I'm here gifted with a crazy woman as well. So we should have a good time. Labia Menorah. That just got fucking weird. Yeah.

So when we first joined, it was a little bit, you know little bit you know confusing because you think okay well I've got all these other you know groups that I'm a part of or communities that I'm part of work people that I talk to etc how does this fit into my life you know and why I guess what I had trouble is why why would I have another yet another community you know that I'm it almost feel like it was a separation or a segregation of my existing life moving into this new lifestyle.

And that was, I guess, confusing for me at the beginning and I didn't really understand how that kind of fit into our life, how that fit into my interactions, what that meant for our day-to-day living and everything else. It was just what was so different about this one or why could other people outside of that not support us the same way that this supposed community could, right? Yeah, I understand exactly what you're saying, but keep going. Well, thank you very much for the prompt. I really appreciate that. Now, that's when we first joined, right?

Now, thinking back, fast-forwarding to maybe like a year and a half, two years in. So, by this time, we'd been to Tannin, we'd been to Desire, we'd met a lot of people out in Sydney. And those of you who are listening for the first time, it's naughty in New Orleans. Absolutely. So, we had been to a few different clubs, we had been on dates, we'd started to form friendships, right? What did you then think?

You know, from thinking that, what the what the fuck is this community or god it's a bit of a wank what did you think maybe a year and a half to in god we've met some fucking weirdos valid yeah yeah no i'm kidding um actually i don't know that the i don't know that there was that feeling of community yet once we'd gotten to that point because i think we made some good friends and made some and had a whole lot of fun along the way but i think that to me the definition of community is much broader than that it's about helping people that you don't know sometimes that's community to me so um i don't think we'd really gotten to that point yet because that's what we're only eight months in at this point um we started trying to pay it forward by starting kicking off the podcast which was at about six months in i think yeah around about that yep um so we started trying to pay it forward but we hadn't really experienced the rest of the things outside of the friendships and the relationships and things like that that we'd formed along the way not really the community as I would slate it okay that's an interesting uh an interesting point so you're saying that to feel like you are in a community you have to be helping or want to help or somehow involved with other people impacting their lives is that well yeah I think impacting their lives and also having them impact your life I think that's part of being part of a community is to actually help and be helped you're probably right there actually thinking about that point in time we we had made some great friends you know and still to this day same friends we just started doing the pub crawls I think around that same time in in sydney and so we'd started i guess on this path of yeah trying to reach out and actually build more than just a friendship you know actually build people that you could we're trying to introduce other people to other people yeah that's i guess a really a big key component of that you're probably right thinking on that as well, that was at the time something we were really trying to achieve.

You know, how do we integrate ourselves, but also take a part of our vanilla, you know, if you want to call it vanilla life, back into this lifestyle life and actually create people around us. You know, not people that we would just go to a club with, not people that we would just, you know, go and have dates with or swing with, but people that were legitimately around for, I guess, some of the shitty times, right, as well as the good, yeah? Yeah, absolutely. Not that we've ever had any shitty times, babe. The whole time I've been married to you has been fucking awesome.

Oh, so the last year has been great for you? It's been amazing. Oh, excellent. Loved every moment of it. That's good to know. Only because you were here.

Previous nine years, total shit, but last year, that's that's good no i said the whole 10 years all right uh let's fast forward to now and think about even just the last 12 months so the last 12 months let me ask this question this time around because fuck i'm like it's like a barrage of questions coming my way you're like you just keep throwing them at me pizza or pasta pizza of course uh trains or buses neither you have to pick one that's the rules i've ruled death all right ask what do you got what do you ask me any questions go take take it over d uh okay so now that you've made it all the way to the you know the deep inner workings of the lifestyle community, what do you think of the community now, Kate?

What brought you to the antithesis? It's not really a word that I can use here, but I like it because it's big. Or the marmalade. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. Mic drop. Just a question is, community, your thoughts. Well, God, Dee, that is such a great – I'm so happy you brought that up. That's such a great topic and a great question. Thank you. Really. Thank you so much for doing that. Read it off your paper. Great job at moderating.

your paper's titled start date 100 it is not titled that at all look i think now you know getting being a lifestyle now for five years you know meeting people all around the world helping people and as you say we've been helped as well or in my case hindering people or hindering people seeing relationships develop and change and adapt over time i think that the biggest change for me has actually been a growth in myself because what i've come to over the last 12 months really understand in particular is that everything is is very different you know we talk about diversity all the time yes but even within relationships even within your swinging relationships your friendships those adapt they change they grow they modify and that's not necessarily a bad thing and that has been something over the past 12 months that I've really come to understand I think a little bit more than perhaps I would have when we got into this you know I think that some of the times we do make these connections and we do feel like we've built a community and sometimes when that gets on a bit of rocky ground you know some things happen people's situation changes sometimes you can feel like that's not a personal attack but you can take it personally whereas I think now I've probably come to understand that that relationship just played its course and that's fine and that does not you know doesn't really have a negative impact on your time that you spent together it's just that that was that particular relationship in the way that it was passing through I feel the same way about the community you know it is it is really what you put into it what you get out of it you know so it can absolutely mean different things to different people and that's my biggest takeaway you know i think that i probably at one point was holding it on this pedestal and i think that when something then goes a little bit rocky you can take it a little bit hard whereas now i think i'm much more grounded when i think about it, right?

That went deep. That went really deep, really hard. I actually didn't interrupt you then because I was thinking like deeply about what you were thinking about. And I think that we have absolutely, you know, tried to help people along the way.

We've tried to help people that we've, you know friends with even uh complete strangers you know podcast listeners have reached out with some pretty heartfelt emails and you know rather than just shooting back a hey thanks for telling us your story what we can do sometimes is send back a we've got your email we're gonna we're gonna think on it we really want to spend the time to reply to you so rather than responding on my phone i'll come back and sit in front of a keyboard and do it properly and you know i think you can have an impact on the on the broader people and and as you said before you introduce two people together maybe your relationship has come to the end with those two people but they may maintain a great relationship that rolls into the years and that in itself is an absolute blessing and something you should be proud of yeah i mean that that's kind of what the community is about to me is that you're involved and not necessarily um are you ever reaching inside the community because there's the the friendships that you build in life ebb and flow and sometimes they ebb and sometimes they flow it just depends on who they are and what things are doing and but you know but it's easy enough to remain friends whilst things are changing in everybody's life you know it's just how life is all right now let's step away from the candy-coated version of the lifestyle community for a second communities are not they're not uh faultless right that's just it's not reality because there are humans that are living their lives pardon there's humans that are living their lives in this i call it facebook you don't even use facebook you people people it's such a intensely amazing community nobody's making any money out of it at all it's just all about you know and ads community and ads yeah i did actually want to start a twitter account up one day that's just you know the boring life of of c and just do the stuff like here's me mopping the floors and now i'm folding clothes and hey here i am you know cleaning the mold out.

Woo-hoo, life is fucking hashtag amazing. I totally wouldn't subscribe to that. It sounds fucking boring. It depends. Are you in the shower nude? Nah. I've got like a hazmat suit on. Yeah, well, actually, knowing the mould in our shower, you probably need one. All right, so. Just cleaning your hair out of the drain.

It's like, you know eight feet eight feet long there's guys out there right now nodding vigorously eight feet long and it's got things growing on it that just shouldn't be growing so i pulled it out once and there's a dude there was a dude on the end he was like daddy i'm like whoa dude no not your daddy and he's gone feed me i've I've gone, fuck no, put him back down the drain. Oh, God. I just snipped the hair at the top. He's down there now talking to the alligators. Excellent. Wow, that went really interesting there for a second. No. So, yes, the community itself is not faultless.

So, Dee, talk about that a little bit. We don't want to make out like everything's fucking rainbows and lollipops right dig us into perhaps some things that can go wrong well things can go wrong in any relationship you know and it's easy easy for them to go wrong in a broader relationship as well that stretches all over the world it's communication is certainly part of that and you know it's harder to communicate sometimes with some of the people that you are involved in this community with and that you care about and it can be like that, you know.

Community to me is something like a family, you know. They're always around and always important to you but sometimes you just want to fucking strangle them.

Yeah, and actually I think it does come down to a lot of the fact that you have to understand that people have their own their own stuff going on and you also have to i guess cop to it when you've you've made a mistake so literally just owning your shit you know sometimes it's really really important anything touching a nerve there sweet cheeks yesterday i was uh i i made a joke um with that couple next door our friends we love And I made a joke. And I took the piss, as we do in Australia. Unfortunately. It was a dick move. It was a fucking dick move.

And so I texted them and I was like, hey, that was a joke. But I realized after the fact that it was a little bit of a dick move. And I can see how that was not appropriate joke. As soon as I pointed it out, she knew it was a dick move. That's not true. I told you I made a dick move.

It was a move so i i so i messaged them and i was like hey told me what she said and i'm like that's a dick move i i fucked up it's it's my bad i'm owning my shit if you guys are angry absolutely you got the right to be and and sorry you know no and i said no excuses i'm owning my shit it's fucked up and uh you know that's just kind kind of what you've got to do, right? Yes. And people will respond to that, I think. Yeah, absolutely. They fucking hate us now. Thank you for that switch. Thanks for being our friends, guys. Jay and Kate, it's been a nice couple of years. Now they fucking hate us.

Sozzy. Mostly you. So I'm still in with a chance because, you know. You want to have sex with Kay? Yeah. Okay. Maybe a scooch. What about something that just actually just popped into my mind was sub-communities. So community is obviously very, very broad, right? Sub-communities, wow. Clearly you would have some sub-communities that are going on. I didn't know that there were any swinger submarine cruises going on. Is there swinger submarine cruises going on? Because I'm happy to be a submariner. I would go – no, I wouldn't. That'd be terrifying.

That would be really, really scary I think, being underwater in a enclosed space, surrounded by swingers. That would actually be quite frightening. That would be quite frightening. Although a cruise is still my definition of hell, so...

But it is, I think it's something that's just going to happen, right happen right sub communities are going to exist purely because even within the community you're going to find you're going to find people that are more aligned with your i can't i can't concentrate with your interests uh you know the way that you approach the lifestyle you know your general life how you live your life you know there's going to be people that are going to align more closely to that and so yes you will just happen to create sub-communities it's just how we are as humans and i don't think that's actually a negative thing i think that can be awesome because it's almost like you're leveling up your support for those people right as long as you're not as long as you're not ostracizing other people by doing that correct on purpose i mean that will happen kind of naturally anyway as as a group becomes more focused on the things they're into and it might be family you know it might be i don't know saving dolphins or whatever but there's going to be people who are not interested in well let's say family because i think most people are interested in saving dolphins yeah absolutely it could yeah because it could it could be any number of things but you're going to get people that take that very seriously and then you're going to get people that are just like hey yep cool i mean you do you but it's not really my deal and yeah you're right i mean it's important for the people looking outside not to judge those in that sub community but equally it's super important for people that are in that sub community not to outwardly judge people out here you know sometimes we hear some negative terms even within the lifestyle like oh you're not kink enough or you know you're a true vanilla i try to judge as much as you're a vanilla swinger or these sorts of things i think that's important to not not poke those holes back out as well i um i try to judge as much as i can do you yeah It's the only way that I can keep myself celibate.

Judge D? Yep. back out as well i um i try to judge as much as i can do you yeah yeah it's the only way that i can keep myself celibate judge d yep judge d can i be like i would be such a good judge judy i'd just be a screaming banshee i was thinking more like judge dread actually well judge judge dread give me some guns and i'd be just about useless actually because i the muscles to hold them. His jaw pulling that face through that movie must have just cramped up every day. The nearest movie, not the Stallone version, because the Stallone version was just appalling. I liked it.

Almost unwatchable. I think it was great. But I like Waterworld, so, you know, sue me. What are you going to do? Well, we just lost a third of our listeners. I know, guys. I know, guys. Fucking Waterworld. Fair point, fair point. Just FYI. It's a guys. I know. I know, guys. Fucking Waterworld. Fair point, fair point. Just FYI. It's a guilty pleasure. I also like Waterworld. We like Waterworld. So if you've been listening to us from the beginning right up until Stardate 100, then suck it. Hey, come around and watch Waterworld with us. It's a long ass move. You can do that.

It's only three hours of your life. You'll never get back. Before we close out, last thoughts on this topic, Dee. Anything more about the community? How do you feel now? How do you feel being a part of it? Do you feel positive? Do you feel happy? Do you feel blessed? Do you feel angry, judged? What do you feel? I'd feel great if I could finish an answer to a question. That's probably one of the biggest things. This is, you know, like there were two in there. Now I've forgotten the first one. You know I'm not smart enough to store two questions. It's not great to be interrupted, is it?

I'm like a fucking eight megabyte, you know, memory card that you use to stick into your camera and you take three photos and it's fucked. That's basically my mind.

So now I've forgotten what your second question was because I went off on a tangent yeah wow geez insightful as ever thank you thank you so i uh to to answer your second question i think i think i've been a lot of those things all at one all all at different times you know we've had times where there's where i've been well most of the time I feel very privileged to be part of this community because it does afford us an awful lot of lovely benefits in terms of, you know, lovely people we get to hang out with, people we've never met who are actually really kind to us when we meet them, which is really nice and kind of unusual for me to be honest that's certainly one of the things but also you know I feel like we've got friends all over the world who are actually close enough that if we needed to in a time of trouble you know we say we're traveling through Canada and we had something go wrong i know that we've got at least two couples there that i could no sorry three couples that i could comfortably pick up the phone to and say guys i need your help and honestly i think that they'd be there if they can you know um so that's that's kind of the the community that i refer to is that we've got now friends all over the world some of them we've met some of them we've not met some of them we skyped with who who are just lovely human beings and will help out where they can to a fellow traveler in need you know a fellow fellow community member in need um you know if we're ever taken over by aliens they'll be the first to hand me the towel i like that you threw in a hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy reference did you do that for me yes of course i did i've never read the books i know you should read them that's ridiculous the movie's great uh everybody's read the books hates the movie but's quite good.

That's it. I liked what you said there. And also, yeah, it is kind of nice when people help travelling to Canada or they help you and, you know, maybe do things like offer you their room or things like that. You know, help you out at a time. Look at Kate moving here. Like, you know, my present has suddenly turned into a chance for her to get laid. Yeah, and save on accommodation. Fuck. You can't say that. That's terrible. Come on, they know I'm taking the piss. Well, I hope they do. I hope they do because otherwise there's some more apology messages coming your way.

She is definitely taking the piss. We would never, ever expect anything like that.

I suppose that's actually one of the things that makes this community kind of interesting is no expectations on shit happens without expectation you know like you'll have people offer you things that you're like uh i really don't expect that and they're like yeah i know you don't we just we're friends right so so this is what i kind of expected i should help you out with you know that's really really lovely true and again quite surprising in this somewhat cynical world that we live in yeah that's true i think that probably we get a bit shielded you know because we do have people kind of rallied around you just being nice to you all the time yeah absolutely i can't wait until uh you know us coming out makes it into the mainstream of our lives guys i'm gonna put my hand up right We're going to need your fucking help if that shit happens.

And your head will fucking pop off. I would go into like an anxiety ridden little ball. Because you're still in like this cocoon of swinger friends who are all like, this is amazing that you've come out. Well done. So Kate's like, this is great. There's been no bad feedback at all. And then, you know, as soon as her parents find out, fucking see MASH. Yeah. Watch her fall to the floor in tears and suck her thumb whilst pushing her way back to the corner. With a bottle of wine. Is there a bottle of wine in that situation? Every time you're in a room, there's a bottle of wine in that situation.

Excellent. Just making sure. I was a little bit concerned for a second there. Hey, let's head over to the guys, but I want to share this with you definition time, D. Guess what? I found a new definition for community online. Yarn. I loved this one. I loved it because I think it actually summarizes what I feel. I think this is a perfect definition for the community. Does it involve a huge purple cock? It does not, but are you ready to listen to this? Can it? It can. Go. Community, a group of people that care about each other and feel they belong together.

AM, who also happen to own purple dicks. Huge purple dicks. What do you think about that, though? I like it. Well, I mean, look, I could come up with more than one definition of community, I'm pretty sure.

So I think that will be a perfect fit for what we're trying to achieve in this particular podcast awesome hey guys there's going to be a blog that's going to be about community attached to our website swinging and under.com forward slash community go check that out it will have a photo of the huge purple cock you want to put it in there yeah absolutely and these fucking blueberries for no other reason but purple cock and these blueberries i mean i'll add that tomorrow but yeah, go over. You're just going to stick a random cock shot in there, a random dick pic.

Yeah, I'm going to say this is the purple dick that we're talking about. It's huge. It's like a two-hander. Go over and check that out on our website and have a look at that. I'll put it in the show notes too, a direct link, so you guys can check that out. I'm actually thinking about wearing this thing whilst I go to the toilet next time and putting my penis underneath it when I piss so that people think I'm pissing out of this huge fucking mega purple thing. Visually, I don't think that's going to work, Dee. I like my head's out, but it's not going to work. It will. Trust me, I'm an engineer.

I can make this work. Okay. So coming up next, we've got That Couple Next Door, Monogamish Marriage, Swinger Diaries, Sex Uninterrupted, Tour Mototango, We Got A Thing. Thank you guys for sending in your audio. Appreciate the fuck out of everybody for listening. And after that, there'll be some good podcasts. And this is episode 88. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Please don't shoot me. Start at 100. She's taking it on board. Oh, my God. One last thing before we go. I forgot to newsletter. So, swinginganager.com forward slash newsletter.

June is Pride Month, and we're doing a whole newsletter based on pride month we also have a really exciting fucking announcement that's coming out 28th of june so if you hear this get online make sure you're subscribed um it's going to be a great newsletter this month uh with some pride stories in there and various articles about pride month but there is a massive announcement in there as well so swinging down under, check it out. Why are you holding out on this announcement?

I'm holding out because this podcast is getting released prior to the official announcement date, so I refuse to break my own rules. I feel like this is killing me. It's not. You're one of those people who's announcing something before it's announced. Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Oh, wow. I can feel the groundswell of enthusiasm coming as people wonder what this is. Oh, fine. I'll put a photo of Daryl's left nipple in there too. I don't know, whatever. My nipple? All right, let's cut to everybody else that knows what they're talking about. What do you think, Dee? Yeah, let's do that.

All right, thanks very much, guys. Thank you for your help, lovely gents and ladies who are adding to my podcast so uh i don't have to do the full hour of recording and to everybody out there listening thank you so much again for for tuning into another episode we appreciate the fuck out of it thank you for including us in your lifestyle and your community hi i'm jay and i'm kay and we are that couple next door yes we are we want want to thank Kate and Daryl for inviting us to share on their show our thoughts about what the lifestyle community means to us. So do you want to take it first?

Sure. All right. What it means to me, it means that I feel supported and I feel like I can be my authentic self with these people. Yeah. Authenticity is important. Yeah. Even when we first started in the lifestyle, I had a group of friends that were very vanilla friends, but I would hint around at some of my interests sexually, specifically regarding the hot wife stuff. Yeah. Stuff like that. Like, oh man, I think it would be my, it would be hot to see my wife in this or that scenario. And they would look at me like, dude, you are a freak. They would say that to you.

They're like, dude, you are a freak. So yeah. So I think for you being in this group of people, you felt valued to have these thoughts. Yeah. And then I found other people like me, like minded. Yeah. And that was really so nice to feel supported and so nice to feel that I wasn't alone. And there's never like a stress when you're with, we have some really great friends within this community and I never feel stressed about saying something wrong in this group of people like, or why would you say that? Or why would you feel that? I always feel supported for sure. Yeah.

And it opens up discussions and I think you're able to explore your thoughts and find out that other people may have you know similar or differing opinions but it's a safe space to be able to talk about the different ways that we all engage in the lifestyle because there's so many different ways to be in the lifestyle right some people are just voyeurs and they want to watch others and some are exhibitionists that just want to have sex with their significant other in a public setting and some people want to have 10 people orgies on back-to-back weekends i mean there's something for everybody there is yes so yeah we really value this community and as a couple that has a voice in this community because we stick microphones in front of our face once a month, we think that it's very important to convey that sense of safety to others and let other people know that whatever they're thinking or whatever they're interested in, there's probably a place for them.

And we can help people help people find that we've had couples email us and we were able to direct them to either other podcasts or blogs or resources dating websites lifestyle websites yeah so it's really been life-changing you know I remember when we first joined the lifestyle we listened to a podcast, I think it was by Swinger Diaries, Pen and Page. And they did an episode on the lifestyle in general and is the lifestyle actually a lifestyle? Do you remember that one? Yes, I do. And at the time we were really new and we're like, Oh, I don't know if this is really a lifestyle.

I don know if I agree with that I think it's just a hobby it's something fun that you do but over time it has definitely transformed the way that we make friendships and the way that we work out and the things that we eat and the places we travel to so yeah it has become a lifestyle it has become a lifestyle for sure largely due to the community yeah yeah so those are our thoughts on community i'm excited to hear what everybody else thinks and look forward to listening to this episode yeah thank you and have a red light day oh i like that you switched it up hey kate and daryl it's mike and Mike and Kate from The Monogamous Marriage in Toronto, Canada.

And we just want to send along some ideas about the role of community in our journey as bloggers. And it's been a big deal for us. And I guess that partly goes back to the idea that you can't actually be in the lifestyle without community. So you can be into BDSM and you and your partner can flog each other to tears in your own private dungeon, but you can't be a swinger without involving other people. But where to find those people, that's the big challenge. So for us, certainly internet dating was a big breakthrough for us at the personal level.

But as bloggers, it was really all about Twitter. And that was all Kate's doing. Yeah, we blogged in obscurity for about a year and struggled to find an audience.

So I ventured into the big scary world of of Twitter where I knew no one and it felt very lonely until I started reaching out to some of the other podcasters like you guys and We Got a Thing and Normalizing Non-Monogamy and That Couple Next Door and Swinger Diaries yeah and everyone was really warm and welcoming and um i gradually started to feel like we were part of something bigger than just our little blog right but you show me stuff from twitter from time to time because you're the twitter mistress in this relationship and it looks like even to me like a scary place sometimes like it's pretty porny out there.

It is pretty porny. And gapey, like some just horrible stuff I don't even want to see. Well, I try to keep those things out of my feed.

I prefer to have people who have clever, interesting things to say, who are actually conversant with words, not just images and and Kate was one of the most fundamental people in making me feel um really welcomed and included and so I definitely want to thank you Kate for being so sweet and lovely um despite the fact that you had a huge following and we had no one at the beginning so you're gonna tell me how she did that how did she make you feel that way oh goodness I don't remember but like specifically I don't remember but um no she would just say you know nice encouraging little comments and you know like things that I said and I think eventually she reached out through a direct message and And just said that they liked what we were doing.

So that was really nice to hear from someone who, you know, she was big time because it's funny. Yeah. In the podcast world and in the swing corner of the podcast world, these people, those different ones that we mentioned earlier, they're're celebrities and it's surprisingly impactful when you make a personal connection with someone that you only know as a voice on a podcast or as words on a blog so right and since then we've had the opportunity to meet all of these people and they're even more lovely in person than than they come than they come across on their podcast, if that's possible.

Um, so we've extended it from a virtual online community to a real life international community. And, uh, it's been a wonderful journey. Yeah, that's awesome. So thanks you guys. And thanks to everyone who listens and everyone who reads the monogamishmarriage.com. Bye for now. Hi there, this is Paige. And this is Penn. From Swinger Diaries Podcast. Thanks Kate and Daryl for reaching out to us and letting us put our two cents in your podcast. We're really flattered that you care what we think on this topic, but we're happy to give you our opinion. So community to us means a lot of things.

There's really no community like the lifestyle community. Yeah. Why do you think that is? Because we all have this freaky, kinky nature and we all have this secret, sexy life that we live. Yeah. That kind of brings people together because they share this secret thing there and that kind of bonds you to other people. Exactly. As a woman, it is so affirming and awesome to be able to talk to other women about things that are so taboo. And just admitting that you like sex. Yes. Don't you remember when we were brand new, though, long before we ever knew what the lifestyle was?

And our story is that we went to Desire, which was the very first thing we'd ever done. And we were virgins and we were married and never wanted to be with anybody else. We weren't swingers and we didn't know anybody and we weren't looking to be in the lifestyle. So we were just there to watch. When we got there, we expected when you go into a place like that, all of these people would be freaky. They lived this wild alternative lifestyle that was so foreign to us that we could never have anything in common with them. But we were surprised because we made lifelong friends.

I think it's the open and honest conversations that you can have with people in the lifestyle. Yeah. When you're willing to talk about this taboo thing, this super sexy secret that nobody else talks about, and you open yourself up to that, then it gives you things in common and it allows you to talk about other things that are usually taboo too. And that makes for great friendships and people that you thought were kind of fringy, weird, creepy, scary, aren't at all. They're actually very normal, very fun, very easy to talk to, and they become great friends.

And that community, the lifestyle community, has made us better people to the world in general because you don't look at people who are so different from you on the outside as different. You look at them like everybody has a story and I'm going to meet this person too and hear their story. It's one of the real benefits of lifestyle is that it opens your mind to different possibilities and it shows the humanity of people that we all have these basic things in common.

It's a real equalizer and invites you to make friends with people that you wouldn't necessarily have things in common with otherwise. And as a podcaster, it's a whole nother level of community. Obviously, we have our podcasts just like Swinging Down Under. And one of the very best things about it is all of the people that we meet through podcasting. Well, and I think as a podcaster, there's two separate communities. So there's the podcaster community, because we all have this thing that we like to talk on the microphone about sex in common. So they're easy friends to talk to.

And we all have this common goal of getting stories out there and helping newbies not be scared and bringing more sexy people into the lifestyle. And then you have your listeners of your podcast, which a lot of our listeners all overlap, and their love and support and willingness to encourage, lift you up if you're down, support you if you need it, is second to none. The podcasting community was a total surprise to us. It really becomes kind of a fraternity of friends who share this one thing in common, which is that they're willing to share their secrets and blab it over the internet.

Some of our best lifestyle friends and some of the sexiest people we know are in our earbuds just like they're in yours. Podcasting is a time-consuming endeavor. You know, when you first think about it, you go, oh, we'll just pick up a microphone, start talking, and then, you know, push the button and it goes out to the internet. That can be true if you don't want to put much energy or time into the quality of the product. You certainly can do it that way. But for us, we invest a lot of time. We put energy into recording. We put energy into editing.

We put energy into distributing it, and we put energy into communicating with our audience. And that takes a lot of time. And so when you first get involved in podcasting, you realize that if any activity is going to be sustainable, you have to get compensated for all of your energy. Otherwise, it'll be fun for a few months and then it'll just stop. And so when we got started, the first thing we said is, let's be realistic. Why are we doing this? What are we getting from it? Well, obviously in the beginning, it was to help newbies not be so scared.

But what we ended up getting from it is friends. Right. It's the friends that turned out to be the real compensation. They're the reason it's worth doing it. It is the community of our listeners and friends and other podcasters. The payoff is this community that podcasting allows us to have, where it's easy to make friends. Since they know our stories, when we meet you, we can just sit and listen to your stories. Just like this summer's upcoming event at Naughty in New Orleans. We can't wait to meet all of our listeners, and, of course, you too, Kate and Daryl. We miss seeing you.

Thanks, Kate and Daryl. See you at Naughty. Hello, everyone. We are Tara and James from Sex Interrupted Radio Show. We just wanted to chime in on our little tidbit here from Swinging Down Under. And we got their email and we wanted to talk about community. What does the Ellis community mean to you? It means everything.

I think it it's her life now and everywhere we go i feel like we find different pockets of community to be a part of every event everything everything it's just this all the community it's not just local it's not just local it's it's about this whole world that we're living in and trying to shatter the norm of what everybody has been programmed to be. And I think it's so great that the community, they rally around each other. I think everybody comes together, not necessarily for the same reason, but for a common reason. For a cause. For a common cause.

For us to all be open and be able to experience the things that we all desire to experience without judgment or shame or fear right and you can experience anything like all of your fantasies your desires and this is a community of people that are so open to fulfilling other people's fantasies and desires and sharing your own fantasies and protective too oh absolutely Like like there's a very very big protective shield that i think everybody likes to put over top of one another and it's like keep each other safe right and then every time somebody comes in it's like they become part of the group and yeah it's so cute it's so cute to see everybody come together and community is so vast it obviously we're recording here in canada and they're all the way down in australia so that just goes to show you how big this community can be we haven't even met some of these podcasters in real life yet and you know we have so much respect and they're just like devotion for these people because of what this community is they're family they're like our brothers and sisters and i think that they're doing amazing things and so what does community mean to you community means it just means a group of people who are together for the same cause and who love support encourage and you know would never do anything malicious to hurt each other because no shame we're all in it together yeah no shame no guilt no nothing exactly that's what it means to me it means a place where i can be one of my friends put it best is like you know people search their whole lives to find a community where they feel like they fit in and we have found that community and that's what it means to me and how we engage in the community.

We are all constantly out there trying to get people into this lifestyle and educating and advocating it and talking about it, just doing everything we can to bring a positive mindset and de-stigmatization of what this lifestyle community is. And yeah, we engage constantly.

If you ever want to reach out to us, you can reach out to us at sex uninterrupted.com that's our website all that stuff and yeah we engage with anybody and everybody who wants to talk about lifestyle related activities and i think that's where we're going to wrap it up we want to thank cnd from swinging down under thank you for allowing us to be on your show and for inviting us to be on your show. And when we see you guys next time until then, keep it sexy. This is Mrs. Tango and Mr. Tango from tour more to Tango.

And we want to thank C and D for asking us to contribute to this episode with the question, what does the lifestyle community mean to you? I assume they're going to translate this into Australian, right? Yeah, I was going to show off and have us do this in Australia, but when I ran it through Google Translate, all I got were things like boomers and budgie smugglers and fair duncombe dags making jokes in the dunny. So I gave up for now. Okay. Really and truly. Okay. We've only got four minutes, so we'd better get on to answering this question. What does the lifestyle community mean to us?

The first thing that comes to mind is acceptance and deep friendships. It is the one place where we can be completely us in every aspect of our life and feel comfortable and feel accepted. Which is kind of interesting for us because that was one of our biggest fears when we went into the lifestyle. Would we be accepted? Were we too old? Not good looking enough? Will people shun us because Mr. Tango has this really off-the-wall sense of humor. Oh, hush. But you're right. We went into the lifestyle thinking it was purely about a way to explore and expand our sex life. And it is.

But it's so much more than that. When we think of the lifestyle, we think of wonderful friends that we've made, a community of great people. If we go to a lifestyle event, we know that there really won't be any strangers. Just great people we haven't had sex with yet. But there's more than that. Great people that we can, more often than not, quickly make friends with. And lifestyle friends are the best friends. I think that's because you share so openly with each other in a way that you really can't in the vanilla world. So nothing profound from us. Thank you.

I think that's because you share so openly with each other in a way that you really can't in the vanilla world. So nothing profound from us. When we think of the lifestyle community, we think of tremendous relationships and incredible friendships. So, C&D, thanks for letting us contribute, and we look forward to seeing you two soon in New Orleans. Bye. Hello, everyone. I'm Mr. Jones. And I'm Mrs. Jones of the We Got a Thing podcast. Thanks to C&D for inviting us to be part of this conversation. About what it's like to be in the lifestyle community and what community means to us. Right.

So first though, what does community actually mean to us? Well, I think that we can be in a community, but it's not the same thing as being in community. Does that make sense? Yeah it does. So I think we define community as choosing to belong to a group of people that care about each other and want to support each other. Right so let's break that down into three different sections. First of all, choosing to belong. Just because we own a house, for instance, in a community doesn't mean that we are in the community.

Or just because we publish a podcast doesn't automatically mean we are in the podcast community. Just because we are in the lifestyle doesn't mean that we are a part of the lifestyle community. So we have to make that choice that we want to belong and be in the community. Okay, so the second part of our definition of community is regarding people that care about each other.

So for example, like a community is not a group of homeowners that just happen to live in the same neighborhood, or a group of podcasters that just all happen to produce a podcast or a group of lifestyle people that just all happen to be interested in swinging.

You know, it's about maybe those groups of people that have that commonality, but once they become this group that have this commonality, then the community comes into play when they start getting to know each other and developing relationships with each other and then you know essentially caring about each other right so you care about each other rather than the community or rather than the fact that you have a podcast that you're in the lifestyle right so individual people within the community start making those connections and that and that's what draws you in and helps you become like a healthy and active member of a community.

Right. And once you have that care, then the third thing is you want to support each other. And ultimately this is rooted in just being unselfish for the greater good. Like I have to want to lend my mower or to the, my next door neighbor, if he asks, you know, I have to want to share advice withower to my next door neighbor, if he asks. I have to want to share advice with somebody new who's starting a podcast and asked us for help. Or I have to be patient.

When you're talking about new people in the lifestyle, we have to be patient and sacrifice sometimes our own desires, if we have to, to support new people or new couples who are curious about or just coming into the lifestyle. So you have to want to support each other. Right. And, you know, that's not always an easy task. You know, you can't just claim membership in a community. You have to like make a deliberate decision to get involved because you're basically going to get out of it what you put into it. Right. Also, you can't simply claim membership in a community.

You first have to take the time to care about the people in the community. Right. You have to make the effort to reach out to people and get to know them. Right. And that's really when you're going to reap the benefits, I think. Right. So you can't just come in and simply claim the membership in the community and demand the benefits. You have to first support those in need in the community, and then the benefits will be available to you as well. Right. I mean, it's that whole takes a village thing.

You know, if everybody puts some effort into it, then everybody's going to reap the reward with, you know, when you need the support, the support will be there.

You know, and when someone needs a support and you have whatever it takes to lend a hand to that person it's just going to naturally happen you're just going to have that desire to do it right and as the community grows organically the beauty of it is one person or one couple can't possibly support the entire community no so as you develop relationships in the community in your own subgroup you know there are people that you're going to know and care. And if that goes on throughout the community, the entire community is then supported as a whole.

So again, you're only going to get out of it what you put into it. And usually membership community is worth it because there's just so many intangible benefits to having relationships with people. Yeah, being in community is wired into us as human beings. So we are choosing to be in community with others in the lifestyle. Care to join us? Hey guys, Kate here and being super lazy and recording this on my phone because I waited over a week to edit the podcast. So it is actually now time to announce the big event that we're attending in May, 2020.

We will be at Podcasterpalooza from the big event that we're attending in May 2020. We will be at Podcasterpalooza from the 15th to the 18th of May next year in 2020. We're joined by a number of great other podcasters. There's only six people announced so far. We've got four more people to be added to the schedule and to announce, you know, who's really going to be attending Podcasterpalooza. It's a whole hotel takeover. So far, we're there with Swinger Diaries. We Got a Thing, Sex Uninterrupted, Casual Swinger, Sex Because, and of course, ourselves, Swinging Down Under.

We can't wait to tell you more about this event, but if you head over to the website, podcast-a-palooza.com, you'll see all of the information there. It's a full hotel takeover, three nights, four days, lots of entertainment, pool parties, seminars and panels happening. So if you're able to join us next year in May 2020, we would absolutely love for you to come and spend a bit of time with us, jump over and have a look at the website. But that's something that we've been really chomping at the bit to tell you guys.

And since I sat on editing this podcast for over a week, I'm now able to do that. So really hope you can join us. Thank you so much again for listening to our podcast just now about the lifestyle community.

We actually been discussing this a lot with many many friends via kick messages even with the bed hoppers over in the uk with our friends the negronis here over the weekend as well so it's a really interesting topic it gets brought up a lot on many forums in in twitter on social media on instagram and you know it's just something that we really wanted to highlight was how the diversity of even the interpretation of the lifestyle community you know is just so vast so thanks again for for joining us thank you everybody for the recent iTunes reviews as well they always brighten our day but otherwise we hope you guys are all well and having a fantastic 2019 so far and we can't wait to hear and see all of you that are going to be at Naughty in New Orleans in a few weeks so bye for now but we'll see you all again soon