P80 – Naughty in Nawlins with Bob & Tess

Transcript

you're listening to swinging down under podcast about the swinging non-monogamous lifestyle from two crazy australians with over four years of lifestyle antics to keep you entertained informed angry happy and horny join our international swinging adventures and welcome i I'm C, crazy female Australian sheila and believer of all things love, balance and sexy times. And this is Dee. I'll be doing my best to keep the dad jokes to a minimum, which is probably going to be highly unlikely. Along with that, I'll keep C and check where I can. Did I mention I'm a pilot?

We'll be your podcast host for today so sit back and enjoy the sweet sweet melodies. G'day guys and welcome to episode 80. Today we actually have an interview with Bob and Tess from Naughty Events so we're going to spend a bit of time talking to them about their history, about them as a couple, about Naughty in New Orleans and a few of the other events that they're hosting in 2019 and 2020. So keep an ear out for that interview coming up shortly. Before we go ahead and get started though, a few housekeeping items. I just wanted to thank everybody for their feedback on our last podcast.

That was a bit of a difficult one for us as most of you well know and we received some mixed reviews on it but I really appreciated everybody as always listening in and giving us their feedback on what they think about the Swinging Down Under episodes. We really do appreciate it. If you guys are out there and thinking about joining us at Naughty in New Orleans in July, we do have a section on our website where you can register as well as sign up for our chat group. We are running a separate chat group as well as a meet and greet on Thursday morning. So we are going offside.

We have a private venue arranged for that with a number of our other podcasting friends. So check that out and join our chat group. If you are heading to Nordian New Orleans, please jump on and have a look at that. One last item as well. I just wanted to mention that we are running a competition at the moment. We are in the process of launching our newsletter and we're giving away this really sexy pillowcase. It's actually, it's really fun. It's Joker and he's actually spanking someone's bottom.

so go and have a look at that um and uh it's obviously daddy's little girl but um jump online if you register for our newsletter in january then we will be sending this pillowcase out to somebody there out anywhere in the globe we're going to post that out to you guys with a couple of other goodies from swinging down under so as always we appreciate the hell out of you guys for joining us on today's episode as we chat to Bob and Tess from Naughty Events I'm going to hand over now to the interview but as always again thank you so much for listening to Swinging Down Under.

Thank you so much Bob and Tess well not only you know I know you guys go by Bob and Tess but forgive me I always like to say the the lady's name first so I'm going to roll with Tess and Bob for this interview but thank you so much for joining us tonight We're glad to be here and actually all of our screen names and all the popular websites are Tess and Bob Because the lady should always come first Exactly, I like where your head's at In and out of the lifestyle absolutely so we are super excited to chat to you guys tonight um to talk about naughty new orleans to talk about what you guys are doing with naughty events and to kind of i guess get a bit of insight into to you guys now we've got some questions but we have some listener questions too so we're we're really stoked to have you on today.

But before we talk about everything else, let's talk about you guys. I read a little bit about you. I'm not going to lie. I stalked. Well, I mean, this is not the first time we've stalked. Yeah. Because we stalked prior to coming to Naughty the first time. So, there's been a lot of stalking going on. And Kate is the queen of stalkers.

Oh, yeah i'm good at it yeah you're a little psychotic so you guys you've been together for 32 years i read that tess you were bob's first kiss tell us what's going on what's happening with you guys tell us a little about yourselves now we've actually been together uh 35 years that's old you've read. We've been married for 32 years. This year I'll be 33. And, yes, I was his first kiss. First everything. First everything. I totally robbed him of his morals. And I'm so happy that she did. Yeah, I can imagine.

Yeah, it's been horrible for you ever since i can you know i really nobody sympathizes with you just fyi i was actually a shy little quiet church boy i was trying to decide on whether to go to bible college or art school and somehow i found my way to art college met tess in and Lyon, and the rest is history. Wow, that's quite a story. So, Tess, were your morals already bankrupt at this point? They were close. They were very close. She was much more of a worldly person than I was. And, you know, you go to a visual art college.

Our joke for a long time was that we were the only two straight people in the college, and that's why we got married. And then I found out later on that I was the only straight person in the college. That's a good segue, though. I mean, you guys obviously, you know, you have naughty events and you're surrounded by everything, you know, lifestyle now. Do you guys actually classify yourselves as, you know, swingers or what do you, without trying to put, you know, these crazy labels on it, but what do you guys like to identify as? Well, I actually do like the word swing.

I wrote an article about it years ago about the connotation for the word swinging has changed so much over the years. I mean, it started dancers and of course in the 50s a rap pack they were all swingers and everyone wanted to be a swinger in that context um you know then it became this austin powers swinger baby in the 70s and it really fell out of favor i think i think the aids epidemic had a lot to do with it. And people at that point were like, oh, my God, we can't do that. And it's really, I'm hoping, changing and coming around and becoming a more positive word.

We've all looked for different words. We're in the lifestyle. We're modern couples. We're open couples, sex positive.

All these things have have come up but really the best definition that defines us and to this day tess and i we're swingers i like that yeah absolutely that's a really cool spin on it i'm gonna you know i'll go back and find that article that you're talking about and i'll put that up in our show notes because i'm really keen to hear that you're right there has been some positivity around the term swing right it is changing I mean there's a lot of sex positive culture and education and you know organizations coming along now that I think are putting a more positive spin on the word it's kind of similar to what gay and lesbian uh movement went through several years ago and they've really gained acceptance and and i think that's the importance we're not trying to convince people to join us we're simply trying to convince people to tolerate us and allow us to live our life as we see fit as long as we don't encroach on them yeah i mean um you guys are really at the forefront of this as well certainly you know you've been around this for a while as you've as you've explained how long you know strictly speaking how long have you guys been in swinging relationship or ethically non-monogamous or whatever you want to call it Uh, let's see.

I think we started when we had been uh married for five years so that's been 30 years ago it's been a long time a long time more than one decade and from there you i mean it's a little while up well quite a while after that before you started your first house party right 1997? 1997, I think. It's kind of interesting, though. Like, seven years after we got together is when Tess actually approached me about this unique opportunity. And I think a lot of people at that seven-year mark, they call it the seven-year itch, find themselves at a crossroads.

Like, how are we going to proceed we've we've been together for seven years which is a significant amount of time and more than many relationships but relationships tend to take a turn around that time and that's what happened with us she came to me and said i'd like to bring a woman home and i was like what like how would we even do this I already had plans this is pre before I was like, what? Like, how would we even do this? Yeah, we had plans. This is pre, before all, Cassie.com and LifestyleLounge.com. This is before all of those. So I was like, how do we find someone?

And luckily, she already had it all set up. But the important thing is we kind of have evolved like most couples. Most couples get together and have a normal life and a normal sex life and at some point they sit up and go should we try something different and that can change to the end of a relationship or or blossom into something amazing like it has with us and it was several years later when we did our first house party i think we're like most most people. You kind of dip your toe into it. You look on the Internet. You listen to podcasts. You might go to a meet and greet.

You know, eventually we went to our first on-premise club. You know, it takes time to explore all these things. And eventually we did our first house party at our house. And that was a pretty big step for us. Yeah, and I mean, so since then, obviously, Naughty Events, I didn't realize that this had been, you know, you guys had actually been going for so long. I mean, you know, Daryl and I, we've only been in the lifestyle now for about five, going on five years.

And so, you know, when I was looking at the history, you know, starting the first actual convention in 1999 and then starting the cruises in 2016, like I had no idea that you guys have just been doing this and growing and, as you said before, trying to take the stigma away from the lifestyle a little bit, not necessarily convincing others to join against their will, but, as say against their will tolerating we have a strict swinger waterboard program we've developed over the years but oh you're so funny oh well we did you know um we just started throwing parties because there was nothing around uh at that time where we lived and we just wanted to meet other people and um and it just got bigger and bigger it ended up with like 175 people at our house and it just became too big that's when Tess pulled the plug on the house party yeah I was like okay this is a little too big we're gonna have to do something else and uh we moved it downtown in New Orleans to the French Quarter that's that's how our first French Connection party started and uh it blossomed from there until it grew so large we were dominating these hotels and we decided to do our first takeover it was actually 2006 when we did our first cruise um so we started planning our first cruise right yeah so we've been working on the cruise business now for well over 10 years and we're not trying to uh convert people uh we're certainly not trying to impose what we do on people that aren't interested in this lifestyle we just want to be left alone to do what we think is right and i remember tessa's mom coming to her saying, I didn't raise my daughter this way when she found out.

And, you know, I remember telling her, absolutely, you did. You raised your daughter to be a very strong, independent woman. And her mom actually told her, be in charge of your own sexuality. Do not rely on another man to take care of you financially, sexually, anything like that. You be your own woman. And that's what she was. She was actually much stronger and much more open than I was. And I think it's exactly because of the way she was raised by her mom and it's been hard for her to understand but her mom. And it's been hard for her to understand, but her mom accepts us.

And that's all we can ask for. Yeah, I noticed the first event or first major event was in 1999. I'm actually just curious.

Was that just so that you could play the Prince song at the event i think that's what it feels like to me you know the first convention is all i mean that that's what it feels like to me um we have been doing our um monthly parties for about a little over a year when bob uh came to me and says you know we had been to a convention in florida and he was like we could do this because you know new orleans is uh the city when we tell people that were from new orleans they say one or two things they say oh i always wanted to go there or they say oh it's my favorite city and he's like we could put an event on here in new orleans and make it amazing and so we planned it for a little over a year and so it just happened to be in 99 when uh when it happened we're actually still partying like it's 1999 you know that first year we worked our butts off and promoted and went all over to get enough people to fill a hotel and we still had uh actual real jobs at that time um so we were doing everything after hours and we were really working long hours to make this uh event happen and uh and it was successful in the fact that everyone had a great time and they love coming to new orleans experience new orleans food and culture music um but financially it was a disaster we actually had to go out and get a loan for over forty thousand dollars afterwards just to pay our hotel bill and uh because we did not fill the entire hotel and and we see this happen all the time where people get something a little bit too big on their first time we did and luckily for us you know test came to me says what are we going to do and i said uh we're just going to do the same thing next year everyone had a blast they'll bring their friends and we'll sell out and that's exactly what we did so 2000 was our first sellout and the rest so to speak is history yeah i i have to correct you too test because you said before that was when you had you know when you had real jobs i mean uh you guys work your butt off it's not easy running events it's not easy connecting with sponsors connecting with venues you know getting these folks in it's not an easy job and in fact um i was actually talking to uh friends from tasmania uh down in australia they're actually coming to naughty norlands and they were in the room next to you i believe um in la or something like that at one of your events and they said that tess worked her butt off was her were their exact words so you know it's it's not easy bob was just lazing around feet up on the table i do tend to work seven days a week um there's always something every day i'm doing um it never stops but uh i am learning to relax a little bit more these days for sure well let's let's talk let's get into nin um you know i i don't know uh if you how much you guys know about our story but We but we actually came to NIN in 2016 and we were fairly new into our journey and it was like we were overwhelmed back then.

So we're ready to come back in 2019 and I've got to tell you, look out Bourbon Street because we're letting these Aussies loose. I'm not holding anything back. We love the Aussies. They're the closest things we've found to true New Orleanians as we travel. We travel a lot, as you know, and we've met a lot of great Aussies along the way. And they always have just a go-for-it kind of attitude. And they're usually some of the last people we see up at night and some of the first people we see up in the morning. So they party like true Norlinians.

Well, you'll only see me up at night, and you'll only see Kate up in the morning. We kind of split that because nighttime is not generally – it's quite interesting, actually.

I never would have picked Kate as a sw um up until we got into it because normally she's ready to go to sleep by 9 30 so that's certainly changed her life a little bit but the the beauty about traveling internationally for your event though is that uh the time zones uh put us perfectly put us perfectly ready to party you know what i mean we're we're about ready we're having our first coffee you know in the morning when when people start and get ahead out and party so uh that's you know that's why we can kind of hit it but talking about nin i mean over the years i've read you know and heard people talk about a podcast the the demographics how many folks that you guys get i mean can you share with us and our listeners who comes and where do they come from and how many people come any anything like that that you can help us out with well they come from all over the world um a majority of our people usually are from the u.s and canada but we get people from south america from europe from china from australia i mean they really do come from everywhere um the average age is about 46 to 48 that of course for uh for naughty and knowledge we don't actually track you know ask people what their ages are but for our cruises we have to have their birthdates uh for the best um but last year we had about 2,400 people at Naughty and Nolens and that's up quite a bit since 2016 so I think you'll see a little bit of an uptick but we're kind of in a in a we've hit that glass ceiling I guess of how many people we can have we've actually for the first time this year we have a second hotel takeover very close to the main hotel, and it also has playrooms and events going on at that second hotel.

So we've had overflow hotels before where we put 30 couples in this hotel, 40 in this.

This year, we have close to a 200-room hotel that we've taken the entire place over so so this year it's going to be interesting having those both those options and see how that goes this year but i'm we're very excited about it so do you i mean do you i know that obviously you guys are investing a lot in marketing and trying to build the brand as well but do you think there's a natural increase as well that's coming along with the groundswell because we seem to see a lot more people out there now especially you know and they're getting younger the the people who are interested in this type of lifestyle so i'm just curious as to whether you think it's a bit of both or or what um what's driving the the increase though it.

It's public awareness. And what we're seeing is a change in what's acceptable sexually. The gay and lesbian movement has really forged this journey for us. They've expanded what people think about as acceptable with sexuality quite a bit since when Tess and I started. A good example is when I was young, in you guys' age, when I was a baby, you never saw two women kiss at a movie theater.

I remember the first time I saw an actual movie with two women kiss, I was like my god it was so scandalous but so sexy and and now today two women kissing is like nothing i mean it's it's so common in college these young girls growing up when katie perry came out with she kissed a girl it was so much less scandalous and now it's just the norm so as you see these people growing up the millennials that embrace a much wider sexuality than was acceptable when we grew up the natural growth of that of that movement is people coming to clubs and going to BDSM clubs and swing clubs and movies like Fifty Shades of Grey.

While that was more BDSM subject matter, it's changing the way people think publicly about sexuality. And the Internet has a lot to do with it as well. So you can find much more information about it um now than back when we first started um with the magazines instead um it really has helped to spread the word and reach out all across the world back when we started it was just us and you know barney rubble and fred flintstone a few people but oh and there was Betty. Don't forget Betty. Yeah, she was cute.

Now, I have a funny question for you guys because when we were there in 2016, I think we got in the elevator and someone was talking about how many mattresses are bought in for the playrooms. How many are there?

Do you know how many are in the playrooms that are you know in the main host hotel i mean i know exactly everything that we have we have spreadsheets we have a warehouse it's it's quite a complex but um there's 140 pieces i know with with our mattresses but some of those that also includes the box springs um some we have box springs some we have different ways of putting the mattresses but i mean off the top of my head i know there's 140 pieces but i'd say somewhere maybe between 80 and 90 actual mattresses that's crazy that's um yeah i mean i think there's you know certainly being there last time around yeah there's a there time around, yeah, there's a lot of play areas that you can have an awful lot of fun at and really well organized as well, I have to say, guys.

You know, that's never been anyone's concern at Naughty is knowing that they've got fresh sheets and things like that as soon as somebody's finished with their last play session. It's kind of my pet peeve. I'm the one that kind of put together the playroom, and I want it to be very sensual and pretty. You know, guys don't care. You can put six mattresses in a basketball court, and the guys will be happy, you know, with the lights on, and they don't care. But I always say, you know, the whole men are from Mars, I always say I'm from Venus.

I've always had kind of an affinity for, you know, spaces being sensual and nice and for me to feel comfortable there.

And we think it's's i think it's important for the music and the lighting and the mood um you know to be something that actually draws people in with a want to play and i remember setting up my first playrooms and calling tess in and tess is more from mars she's like yeah okay i'll i'll have sex in here and but but it's been important and we've added things even since 2016 we have a lot more beds a lot more playrooms uh like i said we've expanded to the two hotels so we have playrooms in both places um our cruise ships were actually you know people that that's one of the times when people first start seeing in mass you know 3,800 people at a time you know our playrooms and it became a signature thing for us and so much so that you know one of the the new announcements we have now is Desire and Temptation Resorts the bass has come on their cruises and and put our playrooms on there and give it that Bob and Tess touch.

So we're excited that we're actually taking our playrooms on the road now to Las Vegas for an upcoming event in May and also not even New Orleans, but also now on more cruise ships.

So I think it's I just think it's important to have a really beautiful sensual space that people can play at at these types of events and just to clarify that for our listeners that that may be a metaphorical touch of a bobbin test rather than an actual touch although if you play your cards right it might be both yep for sure do you say being a event host i mean we've hosted a few um you know meet mingles and pub crawls over the years but what we've found is that we never get to play at our events you know you know as you said tess you you're working so hard you're kind of running around you're trying to do everything do you guys ever get a chance to play at your own events it depends on the events uh we have before and um it's hard for us to play together at our events because we're both going in different directions but you know it really just kind of depends on how exhausted we are and uh the opportunities that present themselves we try i mean we are at our core swingers and and here we are an event with 2400 people and we always eventually get some sort of an offer but you know the typical problem for us is someone comes up and says hey do you want to do something now while somebody on my other side is saying hey someone just threw up in the bathroom yeah you got to take care of it and it's like oh geez the last thing i want to do is leave a pretty girl to go deal with somebody but but that's just part of our what we have to do luckily for me and for for tess in new orleans um our house was only a few blocks from the hotel and what we found in the past was uh sometimes we'll escape and go over to our little pool of souls and we'll invite people to come up with us over there and that's usually where we get most of the opportunity for playtime is when we're physically out of the hotel without somebody whispering our ear about something going on and we can just take a moment over at the pool and have a good time yeah we we actually we're physically out of the hotel without somebody whispering our ear about something going on, then we can just take a moment over at the pool and have a good time.

Yeah, we're big advocates for morning or day sex at events like this or if you go to Desire or something because the evenings are so full of everything else that's going on. You either can't leave or don't want to leave. So we're big advocates for that, hooking up during the day. Well, just so you know, I'm always up early. Is there coffee? I'm usually up earlier than him. I like to have it, but some people will, one of my favorite things to do is, you know, someone will come up to me and say, hey, let's play.

play i say you know what wake me up come at eight in the morning and knock on my door then i'll be able to play wow that actually sounds really quite sexy rather than just hand them a key and say wake me up in the morning that sounds like a lot of fun you know the old saying right what the early bird catches the pussy, no? That's right. That's what I got told.

Well, look, you're taking over being the funny one on the podcast it's getting weird hey uh i just i want to mention the uh the upcoming lifestyle awards i was looking into that and i didn't realize that you guys actually i mean i know that you're you're very passionate about uh sex workers you're advocates for that. I know that you do a lot of charity and you have your own sort of volunteer area on that. But the Lifestyle Awards, you guys started them, you fund them. You know, tell us why you think it's important. Like, what about the Lifestyle Awards and that recognition?

What's driving that for you guys? For years, we've always had lifestyle business meet and greets, get-togethers at our events so people can talk to other people in business. It's so funny to be in an industry get-together and listen to people's stories because there are stories we all have the same stories over and over and over again in different locations around the world but the one thing that we didn't have was any sort of recognition for all these people that were just really working hard many not making any money we went a club last night, and this club doesn't make any money.

And, you know, they work their butts off because they love it. And that's what we found in this industry, in this lifestyle is only a few people make money. Most people are doing it for the love.

And even the people that are making money, because we're proud to say that we are in a living at this because uh we work hard at it but no one was getting recognition so we decided to put this awards together and um we actually uh have like an independent person that actually goes on and puts up the people's you know that they look for new clubs and new podcasters and whatever and they're constantly updating and putting things up we we stay out of the voting side of it but um but we do you know put it on at our event we did uh fund the awards and and kind of got it together and it's really grown from you know just a simple little show that you know took a half an hour to, you know, kind of like the lifestyle Grammys.

Are there Oscars? Yeah. Yeah. And I think it's, I think there's been appreciation, even for people that don't win. You know, they're like, we're just glad that somebody is recognizing all the hard work. Yeah, I think it's really important because you are right i mean a lot of people are doing this their own time their own money um you know trying to support the community trying to put it out there and uh you know it is kind of nice to have something that helps people feel recognized i think gives a legitimacy to an industry like nobody thought of this as an industry 10 years ago.

It was just mom and pops getting together to open up clubs, many in their houses, in their homes.

And we know lots of people that lost everything because they started a club in their house and then, you know, got raided, got shut down, got outed, got put on TV, um you know consequences that they certainly never anticipated so you know for these reasons we thought it was good to get back but it is an industry strip clubs went through a similar thing years ago most strip clubs were mom and pop run deals and now strip clubs are actually you know on the dow There's strip clubs trading publicly as publicly traded companies. They become corporations and much more, you know, professional.

And we see the same thing with our industry. You know, most clubs and event planners now have corporations set up. And they're doing things much better.

And I think of this you're finding more legal clubs uh less raids less problems and uh and more people having fun enjoying themselves yeah it's um it's interesting just you know to think about what the future holds especially the near future because certainly if i look back to australia i mean obviously we're located in singapore here now which is a little bit um uh different in terms of their movement along the sexual spectrum but uh back in australia certainly in the time that we've been involved in this it's been a huge change in face in how the business operates you know it is much more of a business now um with a mindset to actually keeping customers happy and and that means not only are the customers having sex but they're having sex in places that they enjoy rather than in you know things that are thrown together on a weekend right things used to be in little dark shady little places and now we're seeing them in very beautiful upscale clubs and i think this is a good thing i had somebody contact me one time and say you know the cops are really screwing with me and you know they keep coming in me I need, like, to upgrade and put a fire exit sign, you know, above my door.

And I need to put these push bars, you know, emergency open doors. You know, I can't believe they're screwing with me. I'm like, wait a second. You know, those are things you should have. Yeah. Like, you're talking – there's reasons these laws exist. There's reasons permits require these type of things at public establishments that are commercial. I said, we've learned lessons from, you know, fires and people can't get out of buildings. They're not screwing with you. They're allowing you to operate. So step up to the plate and fix your place up. And that's what we're seeing.

And I think it's a good movement. I think it's good. There should be fire extinguishers and exit signs and doors that can open in an emergency. Those are things that should exist.

And these people that are mom and pops are now learning how to truly be a businesswoman and a businessman and we're seeing clubs like colette and trapeze and the champagne club we we go to these clubs and we're just amazed like these are some of the nicest forget the swinging part of it they're some of the nicest nightclubs we've ever been in, and we think that movement is a good thing for our industry and for people interested in swinging in general.

Yeah, well, taking it out of the dark areas that you mentioned, out of the shady areas, makes it more welcoming to people as well, which I think is a big aspect in the the change you know it you don't have to walk into a dark alley anymore and kick a cat out of the road to get into a club you know you've um you walk into a nice main entrance that's you know it's normally somewhat shielded from the public depending on where you are in the world but at least you've got you know there's a feeling there that you're actually going somewhere, not that you're hiding in a back alley. Exactly.

And that's going to help us all in the future, the acceptance of this lifestyle. So, you know, there's still so many people out there that can't let their jobs know that they're what they're into and their families.

And us I mean everybody knows about us and it's really refreshing to not have to to hide oh Tess you're you're speaking my language babe I'm actually quitting my job in hold on a second 11 days and the reason I'm doing that is and the reason that we're using our names on the podcast now is because i haven't been able to for because of my contract because of my uh my employment um i'm quitting for various reasons but the the positive uh side of this is that i can now actually come out and say this is you know i'm kate this is daryl um you know we're trying to be more authentic within ourselves you know and and it's really freeing i've never really given a shit yeah he doesn't give a shit hey before we we've got some listener questions they sent these in but uh before we move on um i i'm a big fan of a particular novelist who lives in new orleans and i know you guys have lived there so this is a funny ass question but have you guys ever seen anne rice she's the lady that created the the vampire chronicles the interview of the vampire have you ever seen her out and about in a bar i mean come on tell me i have not it would be really cool too but i don't believe she lives in new orleans anymore dang she sold she sold her house we we know her house we've seen her house and tessa's read all of her books that would just be my dream anyway celebrities out and about in new orleans all the time you know tess is actually well known as a celebrity butt grabber you know me too moment me too moment can't do that but for a long time we would see celebrities in bars and tess would just just go up and grab their butts.

They always got a kick out of it. Yeah, it started, I think the first one was Jerry Springer. Yeah, that was in Hedo. Jerry Springer. Yeah. And then multiple other stars would come by, and Tess would just run up there and grab their butts and it was funny at one particular place we saw um these guys from what's that movie uh weekend at bernie's weekend at bernie's and uh so he went up to i think it's joel silverstein jonathan silverman jonathan silverman i'm not good with celebrities names and she grabbed his butt butt and she said, what are you doing? She says, it's just what I do.

I grab celebrities butts and he says, oh, will you do me a favor? Will you go over and grab my wife's butt? And she said, sure. Which one? And he said, that one right there. And she was beautiful blonde.

And so she went up to her and just grabbed her butt and she turned around and looked at and she said uh your husband told me to do that and she goes oh okay cool oh i thought the punchline was going to be i'm not married that was pretty funny hers was a much nicer excuse me hers was a much nicer butt than his but um and we got to hang out with him and talk to him yeah it was fun it was actually really cool so but yeah i've had to stop that now so that is quite an icebreaker you've got there tess right just i'm just gonna run over and grab your ass all right yeah uh yeah so a couple of listener questions um this one's from uh who knows and they've said uh how do you envisage nin evolving over the next three to five years and they're asking also like what's needed from the lifestyle community to help make that happen well I think the biggest thing for us like one of our biggest focus going forward is the sexual freedom parade and making that more known and more recognized the event itself is, like I said, kind of hit a ceiling.

We can't really have many more people than we had last year and fit them into the ballrooms and into the playrooms. And the clubs, we've already taken over more and more clubs on Bourbon Street because we just can't fit everybody in.

And there's only so many clubs on bourbon street so so i think some of the biggest things we're doing uh for the event is we're trying to make it more visually appealing we've we've been to a lot of festivals and seen some amazing visual art and visual like video and lighting and and so we're trying to bring in more of that uh and we also think that will help bring in younger people and we'll bring in you know more of these millennial types that go to a lot of festivals uh even though i'm no longer of that age i am a festival junkie myself so i see these things and want to bring the production value even higher and higher um as you'll see when you come this year.

My biggest focus is just getting that sexual freedom parade really to be in the forefront and be something really nationally recognized, similar to the way the gay pride parade started. And I think that will help the down the road uh even be more accepted and more viable uh in the future so put me down for the uh freedom parade like i said i'm quitting my job i'm ready to ready to get out and about she's ready to get free and put me down i will be there with bells on i might have a special opportunity for you. You actually want me to wear bells, don't you?

We might be putting you on a float driving down the street so you can be up on a big float with your podcast on the side. We pick people every year that we think are forward thinkers and progressive people that are pushing this lifestyle forward in a positive way. And we'd love to have someone like you on one of our flows. It's kind of, I think, an honor that we try to bestow on people that are doing the right thing. And I'd love to have you up on a float, throwing beads to the crowd, rolling down Bourbon Street. It's a lot of fun. Love it.

We actually ordered, we've already ordered so many beads this year. I think we bought them in New Orleans last time we went, so we could only buy like, I don't know, I think we ended up buying like 20 or 30. This year I've bought hundreds.

We have an ongoing joke with the TSA in the U.S.s every time we come into the country we've got a bag full of butt plugs or what was the last one cock rings you know so um liters of lube yeah they're starting to um i'm sure there's going to be some sort of black mark against our at some point but we would love that thank you we would love absolutely enjoy that just a warning i've got a head for radio though so you'll love it you guys will have a blast it's uh so much energy the last year we had over a thousand people uh we have marching bands we have a police escort uh it's just it's really the energy now uh and carrying signs that are representing themselves, you know, saying that they're sex positive.

Some people even write, I'm not a swinger, but I support those that are. And so we're getting all kinds of people in the parade now. And even people that aren't with Nadia New Orleans, they're just showing up dressing in all white. So bring some white clothes. Yep. And we're just going to show people that it's okay to be in a different lifestyle. If everyone's in white, I'm hoping for rain. How's that sound? Oh, Lord, don't say that. No. A couple of years ago, it was such a mess. Oh, I can imagine.

It would be um it would be pretty well i mean for starters you'd knock a few people on the head they'd just stay at the hotel and work on getting laid i would suppose exactly they put a big dent into the parade for sure so um it's not a bad run into what r&m socials asked us they mentioned that you did a an event in la and they're curious as to whether you're going to do that again uh the reason we did that event is because we had a cruise going out of la and it was a a shorter cruise so we wanted to do an event it was a four-night cruise i believe and we want to do an event to make it a week-long event.

So that was really the only reason we did Naughty in L.A. We'd love to go do some more cities, and we've expanded to Las Vegas now. But, you know, honestly, with the cruise and with New Orleans and with Las Vegas, we're also doing something down in Mexico now called Naughty Beach.

We're kind of at our own personal capacity at this point um but we've hired some more people and you know the more work they do the the more opportunities i think will come in the future asia sorry what sorry sometimes i get that asia crook stuck in my uh right there yeah we love asia we've been in thailand many times and and the next time we go over there we're gonna go south and hit new zealand and australia for a bit so nice that's that's definitely in our planning stages to go over there and and we're hoping one day we can do a group cruise probably not a takeover at first but we'd love to see a smaller you know a group of people uh go over there and do maybe a an aussie new zealand type cruise in the future sounds perfect it does you can pencil us um pencil us in for that one as well if you're planning on doing that it will certainly be a long um it's it's something that's desperately missing in the i mean australia is a long way away from everywhere that's one of the one of the major issues behind that of course but um yeah if we can certainly drag some more people out of your homeland down to ours that would be fantastic i think it'd be a very exciting trip for everyone you guys come here it's time for I'll see you next time.

out of your homeland down to ours, that would be fantastic. I think it'd be a very exciting trip for everyone. You guys come here. It's time for us to come there. And I want to meet all these crazy Aussies. If we did a group cruise, I would think that most of them would be from that region.

But certainly there's plenty of Americans and Canadians that would just love to jump across across the pond and and hang out with you guys yeah absolutely yeah there is there's quite a good size community in australia now as well which is and given you know the again riding the back of the lbgtqi community we we've really been able to express ourselves a lot more than perhaps we have in the past so um actually yeah i mean they're similar to what's happening over there the even mainstream media there's actually tomorrow so on sunday in australia there's going to be a newspaper article out in a major australian newspaper um about the swinging lifestyle and the fact that as you say you know people are turning and investing sorry investigating what they can do with their sexuality and and looking for more and so you know we are seeing more of that picked up as well now i have a question here actually from some some locals they gave me some local jargon about where where they actually live and there's a name of a highway i'm not going to go into any of that but these guys talking about building the community they've just started a blog so they they are the swinging cajuns um you can get them on twitter but they said you know for for people in their local area i mean aside from like the the big events like like naughty you know how how could people start perhaps a local meet and greet uh you know how could the local community remedy the fact that perhaps in some areas or they have a big events or, you know, they have to go elsewhere?

How could they create their own little community if you guys had any tips for them? You know, we started out just going to, you know, local bars and inviting people over. There was no charge. There was no cost.

And certainly that's the easiest way to get up and running where we live in New Orleans there are some amazing clubs like Colette and just outside of town there's clubs at Lafayette there's people that meet on the north shore about an hour north of us there's one of our favorite clubs is Hub City Select it's up in Haysburg Mississippi that's just just a couple hours and there's there's meet and greets that happen all on the coast of mississippi florida the panhandle uh there are meet and greets all over the place it just depends on what you're looking for but if somebody wants to start something new i would uh encourage them to find a really good meeting place and get with the bar owner and tell them you want to bring a group of people and find a little private place in the back.

And that's the best way, I think, to get started. Awesome. Now, it's funny because we put up this, you know, does anybody want to ask any questions? Three of them were really similar.

Three of these questions, we've already covered one, but it's all about, you know, that perception how to you know how do you guys intend to use media coverage so we had one from uh and andy m and the second one from mr gray and they're both saying the same thing you know media has in the past had a tendency to perhaps negatively and you know how are you guys trying to work with some of those media agencies to if you are to you know make it a bit more positive well we just did a show it really hasn't been announced yet but Lisa Ling is a very well respected journalist she does a show called America with Lisa Ling and she's going around looking at people in I guess alternative, alternative communities, not so much sexually, but she certainly picked ours as one.

And she has a one-hour show coming up on it. But we've done media interviews with 60 Minutes, Primetime Live. We've been on every major news station. We do a lot of writing and send off things. We've been in everything you know, everything from USA Today, Washington Post to, you know, for us, it's just about getting out information and finding media sources that will carry our story. Again, we're trying to make our story as honest and open as possible and let people judge for themselves. But we try to do it in a way that is endearing and not scary and not confrontational.

And we've seen very good coverage. Every year we see it getting more and more and more, especially, as I said before, the sexual freedom parade. That's been covered. And we've seen articles in Taiwan, all over Europe, all over the U.S., Canada, Mexico.

It's been covered in we've seen articles in taiwan uh all over europe all over the u.s canada mexico um it's been covered nationally or internationally uh so has our cruises we did a a skinny dip day we try to beat the world record for skinny dipping and uh we actually did and we were getting it certified when a group in ireland actually number out of the water, and they currently hold the record. But it's just about getting as much information out there and trying to find positive media sources, and we've been very fortunate.

And I think when this Lisa Ling story comes out, it's going to be fantastic.

Everything we've seen so far shows that they're just sitting listening to what our people are saying they're not trying to spin it they're not trying to you know critique it or sensationalize it right they're just report letting people say this is who we are and i think that's in the end the most important part is if we can find media to just let people show who they are and what ends up happening is people look at them and go they're just like us everybody has these thoughts and these feelings you know how many actually act upon it we're all attracted to different people i mean that's just a fact of nature we're all told that we're not supposed to be non-monogamous but the truth is everybody at their core is and showing people that you can actually be as you said ethically non-monogamous and it's okay that's a revelation to a lot of people that have never heard that before yeah i agree i mean we've certainly been down that path ourselves in discussions with some of the people that we've we've met along the way and and you know certainly people outside of the lifestyle who well generally kate's actually out at us too which is kind of interesting after a few after a few wines she decides i get drunk and i just let my freak flag fly you know like the mask comes off and i i want to be myself and i'm like just oh you know you guys mentioned thailand Thailand we were actually in soy cowboy which is a pretty well-known bar area and I went out the front and there was a couple sitting there having drinks and I was like hey sat down started drinking and then I was like hey by the way I'm in a consensually non-monogamous relationship my name's Kate how are you guys doing um yeah you just which is really really weird it's weird yeah I get that tess is out ass grabbing celebrities and i'm getting dragged over the coals for telling people about my sex come on you know wine is involved in both of those scenarios there may be there may be something to go there yeah i could have some right now yeah well uh i mean given the time zone difference we are actually having wine at the moment so um this is standard practice for us when dealing with the youth folk over in the u.s is that generally the people we're talking to are drinking coffee while we're drinking wine or the other way around one's a lot more fun than the other for sure yes definitely except tess she puts baileys in her coffee yes i always do oh wow um i just had my parents here to stay i probably should have done that actually would have um would have made life a lot more interesting so this year um test the theme nights what's in store for us this year i haven't actually looked um kate does all the bookings generally for us.

Well, no, the schedule and everything is still a work in progress, so you're asking for a bit of inside intel. Sorry, okay, I didn't realize that. Well, we have announced three of our themes. There's still one more to announce, I believe.

We are going to have a Space Odyssey ball, anything to do with space it should be pretty uh interesting and hopefully we'll have some really creative uh outfits for that night uh we're doing uh we always do a color to make it easy for people and this year we're doing a blue bayou everybody dressing blue all different shades of blue and uh and of course always on saturday night we always have our mardi gras ball um mardi gras masquerade ball so that's just our signature uh one so there is one more theme that uh bob usually comes up with all the themes um and then i either veto them or agree with them so uh i'm waiting for the last theme to come out of his head so that we can get that announced soon.

I'm waiting for that too. You might have to dig it out at some point, just in there with a spoon. Either that or I'll have to come up with one. Well, I love that sexy Space Odyssey theme though. I mean, in my head, I'm like thinking sexy Jetsons. Kate's totally nerding out right now. Yeah. It really is for the nerds. We do an annual space ball parade here in New Orleans called Chewbacca's. And, you know, it's everything. Everything. It's inspired by Star Wars and Star Trek and, you know, all these different. It's all the nerds. It's awesome. It's amazing.

They're so creative with the costumes and the floats and you know all these different all the nerds it's it's awesome it's it's so creative with the costumes and the floats and everything it's it's a lot of fun do a live uh facebook live session from chewbacca's this year so people can see it and get inspired by the amazing costumes people wear that's awesome no i was just saying i in my head instantly i was like i can go as seven of nine from star trek sorry i already have my outfit now playing in my head i gotta say catherine uh captain catherine janeway is still pretty hot yeah she's pretty hot for different reasons barbarella exactly exactly guardians of the galaxy is my favorite i'm trying to think if i can come up looking like that guy.

Yeah. I'm going to need to spend a lot more time at the gym for that. Well, they make these fake washboard abs that I'm thinking about wearing. Oh, there you go. Yeah, that's probably about the only way I'm going to get them as well, I think. Unfortunately, my love affair with pizza and wine comes before my love affair with the gym. We just wanted to, I guess, wrap that up with saying thank you so much. You guys have got some awesome events obviously coming in 2019. And as you said, you know, you're starting to go down to Mexico and you've got the cruises coming up.

So we'll make sure we put a link to all that on our show notes. But we can't wait to come back.

You know, as I said before, we were overwhelmed last time because it was so i mean let's just let's just say it was more me that was overwhelmed than it was you yeah given i come from country boy yeah given i come from a hometown with 15 people yes that's one five um you know to walk into a room full of swingers of that sort of uh that sort of event was a little bit overpowering for me yeah but i'll tell you one of the big takeaways um from us in in 2016 was actually some of the friends that we've made along the way you know we we met some amazing people at uh 2016 that we've kept in contact with that we've flown internationally and internationally to see now yeah um and that's the biggest takeaway for us i mean an event is is amazing and and the seminars and everything else that goes into it is fantastic over the course of the the convention but you know actually creating those uh connections that are going to last you know a lifetime uh is is really special we tell people that we don't gauge the success of an event that we go to on how many times we have sex at the event we gauge the success of the event by how many friends we make at the event yeah i like that uh i like that motto it's a very good way to go for anyone who's listening and is going along as well if you can we were we were lucky enough to stick around for one day after your event when we were there in 2016 as well and actually a couple we met at the event were kind enough to take us around New Orleans and show us you know some of the some of the side of New Orleans that you don't necessarily see as a tourist and it was you know that was actually one of the one of the best days while we were there as well because we got to see the true you know again you you get a tour guide to take you around a town you've never been to before and and um they just happen to be roasting hot as well so uh so it was good visual production as well as um a good tour around the the um the city itself it's a phenomenal city on friday we do a industry tour for people that have podcasts and websites and travel agents and clubs and i hope you can come with us on that actually get to take a tour of our house and some very interesting off the beaten path places you would never find on your own uh tess and i turn into tour guides for a couple hours on friday and uh make sure you save your schedule for that and jump on the bus with us and we'll show you some interesting things absolutely you know we're keen for that we're this year well we're actually going uh via dallas and austin this year we're going to hang out with jay and angie first and then we're all flying down so i i'm a bit concerned about that american airlines flight with the four of us on there.

But we're flying all in on Tuesday morning, and we're not heading out again until Sunday night. So we are definitely there, and our schedule is free. We want to really just soak up the environment and just party, to be honest. Last time they came to New Orleans, Jay passed out on my couch.

We'll have to rhythm about that next time he comes can i say he does that after two years i was about to say i'm sure yours is not the only couch that has experienced jay's passing out yeah i think we've had some skype calls with him on the way home from events where he's um he's already passed out but he's still managing to communicate in some way god love him he's awesome's awesome. We love those guys. Yeah, they're great. Thank you again, guys. We're going to put all your links up here for people to come out.

If anyone out there is listening and doesn't know Naughty Events, jump online, have a look. Well, we look forward to seeing you there and everybody else. And if anyone has any questions about any of our vests, please don't hesitate to call us. There's one last question here from C and D from Swinging Down Under. And that is, when can they expect Naughty in Singapore to kick off? That's hilarious. Well, we appreciate what you guys do. We think you guys really do a good job. We've listened to several of your podcasts. We definitely need more people like you guys out there.