Naughty in N’awlins – P26

Transcript

This is C. D. And this is Swinging Down Under. Well, folks, we've had an interesting couple of weeks. Well, month. Yeah. Interesting month. Absolutely. We've been overseas in the US and Mexico. And Mexico. For the last month, basically. Eating our way around the country, basically. Yes, yes. We've certainly come back a little bit more rotund than we were when we left. Well, I like to say that my pants are tighter but my pockets are empty. Yeah, exactly. It's the best way to be. So, yeah, thank you for tuning in or downloading or whatever the cool cats are saying these days.

Obviously, so you're not one of said cool cats. I never suggested I was. So tonight we're actually going to talk about a recent trip to Naughty in New Orleans. But first, before we get on to that, we have an announcement to make. We do. That's a drum roll for all of you at home. I had this brilliant idea to actually download an app on my phone that would play sounds because obviously one of those would exist. And I was thinking about that while I was not sleeping last night and yet I failed to do that. So here we go. Oh, stop. Please make it stop.

So the announcement is that swinging down under is not as much down under as it used to be. Still down under, just not as far. Just not as far. Kind of nibbling around the belly button at this point. That's right. So you might be interested to know that we have actually moved to Singapore. Relocated to the big Singapore. Well, it's a very small Singapore, actually. We've moved up here for C's work. She's picked up a new job, director of the world. Because I'm awesome.

she tries to take over the world every day that's correct yeah and uh and i have tagged along which means that i am currently working on an ass groove in the couch it's coming along nicely although we took four weeks out of it so um the cushions have sprung back up i'm back to stage three of five Hmm. Good job. Good work there, darling. Yeah. Look, that's what I try and do. But anyway, back to the main reason for the podcast. Okay. So, Naughty in New Orleans. Naughty in New Orleans. For those out there that don't know what it is, give us a rundown. Okay.

Naughty in New Orleans is the largest swingers event on the planet, I believe, or at least that's how they marketed it. In the universe. And certainly I have to say it was the biggest swingers event I've ever been near. Lifestyle event, they say, though. Yeah, lifestyle swingers, call it what you want. Basically what it is is 1,800 randy couples all in one spot. And, yeah, I mean it's a really interesting event. We'll cover off quite a lot of it on the way through this cast.

But, you know, I think the kickoff is really just in the air getting from, because we were in the U.S., getting from, where were we? New York. That is a valid point. We were in New York, yeah. Getting from New York to New Orleans. Yeah. How do you like to say it? And just doing some swinger spotting on the plane. Oh, attempting to.

You know when you know that everyone's cascading into this town and you are looking around at the airport, you're looking on the plane you're thinking who else is a swinger who's here for the same reason as we are and um we were there the day before the event started and i don't know that we actually spotted anyone on the aircraft i would say we didn't that we then saw again during the weekend which was kind of shit because we were hoping to pull the piss out of them. And for all our American friends who we spent some time with at Norty, you'll all know what pull the piss means.

Yeah, so we were looking forward to having some fun with some people that were on the plane. Unfortunately, there weren't any. Except for us. Yeah. We had a few reservations going into this event, I've got to say. First one, first one probably being what is the hotel going to be like, you know, given that it's a, you know, it's a full hotel takeover, we're kind of, let's just say we're a little bit sceptical that the rooms would be to a decent standard. Well, I just don't imagine the Versace, Palazzo Versace just saying, sure, have our entire hotel for a swingers event convention.

I just don't think. I don't imagine the Versace, Palazzo Versace just saying, sure, have our entire hotel for a swingers event convention. I just don't think. Well, I think if you were willing to pay the $10,000 a night for the room. Probably they wouldn't care. I think they'd probably be okay with that. Hey, I'm Hugh Hefner. Can I have your entire place? Sure. Yeah. Not really a swingers event though. That's more of a Viagra digesting event. Well, I was just trying to go for the grandiose kind of. Yeah. Yeah. So definitely had some reservations. I mean, we haven't been to this event before.

I think it's in its 18th year though. We'll put a link up on our website when we do this podcast in case you guys want to have a look at it. I love the way C just throws me in on that. She'll say, we'll put a link up. What she really means is, D, we'll put a link up. They know that. Now they do. They're okay with it. They're on board. Just so you guys can have a look, but I guess, you know, 18 years, it's quite a few events. There's seminars. There's night events. There's day events. You know, and so the idea is that you kind of go along, you meet other swingers, you attend seminars.

You kind of missed the room and everything in the hotel and where I was headed with that conversation. Just to allay any fears, it was actually really good. Would you agree, Sue? The room was acceptable. Acceptable? Well, there was no fridge. Oh, yeah, us stupid Aussies. Well well every hotel we've ever been in has had a fridge well every hotel we've been in in australia has had a fridge it doesn't seem to be as common in the u.s which explains why there's an ice machine on every floor which just doesn't exist here in australia or singapore for that matter yeah that's correct.

Or anywhere in Asia, really. No, no. So we found that a little weird. We were wondering exactly what you guys did with all the ice, what the US guys did with all the ice. And now we know. Now we know. It's for keeping beverages cool. Right. Or cooling beverages once they've hit said beverage glass. So, talking about beverages. Beverages. So we check in. We check in.

We head down to find some liquor and some well hang on hang on you've missed a i think an important part of the check-in process where you decided to be funny and we all know how that works yeah it doesn't so she decided to be funny and push in front of um jay and anj from average swingers and i think she may have taken anj a little bit by surprise because she didn't know who we were at that point well here's the funny thing she knew that there was some Australian swingers coming she knew that those Australian swingers were blond and bald and we fit that descriptor yeah but we also look a a little bit different than the other Aussie swingers.

The Aussie swingers, that's right. And so there was, you know, confusion written all over her face. Now, Jay, he was on the ball. He knew what was going on. And that was quite a funny play out because I walk up, push in front, say, oh, is this the start of the line?

Can I just, I'm just going in here and joke went sour joke went sour south anyway yeah but we introduced ourselves and look there's a lot more story to come on that so we head down to get some liquor and some nibbles and of course where do you do that you do that in a pharmacy at a pharmacy that's what happens you know that's what happens in norlands New Orleans is all about the booze right next door pharmacy and well there were actually three pharmacies on the other three corners yeah from the hotel yep and interestingly none of them ran out of condoms which says to me that all of the swingers came pre-prepared or there was a hell of a lot of unprotected sex happening yeah i'm gonna go with the first one me too just purely for sane purposes sanity sanity yeah yeah absolutely sorry i started getting a visual and i just kind of lost track of my my thought process we got ourselves some booze some booze and some nibbles very important ran into jay and angie again down in the uh the the walgreens walgreens they uh decided to give to give us a bit of some tips, some tips.

There were some kick-to-death eskies there. Do you want to explain to the people what a kick-to-death fine? Well, not really. I'm just going to want people to Google it now so they can figure it out of their own accord. Right. So anyway, so we basically get upstairs. We set the room up is the point we're trying to make here. So, I mean, the key to any swingers event, really, for us is kind of having some drinks, having some nibbles and having a bit of fun. So, you've got to set the room up. Yes. Your guts to do it. Stock the room with water, beverages to go without.

I mean, we bought vodka and, well, that's it. We bought stuffs. Yeah, we bought stuffs. Many things with many monies. Most importantly, though, after we settled in, we showered all the rest of it. We got ready for dinner. We did because we had dinner with... We had a hot date. We had a hot date with some people that we'd been longing to meet for a very long time. And they are the Joneses. Yeah, and you've heard about, if you've listened to our podcast previously, you've heard about us, we've heard us talk about them. So the Joneses, we're keeping up with, are... We Got A Thing. We Got A Thing.

Yeah. They are probably one of the favourite podcasters for us actually. Good content, interesting, I mean, have good have good stories yeah there's only three or four that i listen to constantly although we've been exposed to a couple more since we went to new Orleans some of those later yeah we will some of which we haven't well i haven't downloaded yet we've only been back for a few days and uh yeah we will be um getting hold of those as well absolutely so so hot hot date and we caught up with the Joneses in the lobby and then walked to the dinner location.

Which was actually coincidentally the venue that they were having their meet and greet at. Meet and greet the next night, I think it was. Next day, yeah. Yeah, which was good. We got to pre-sample the food and booze. But it was nice to talk to people face-to-face and kind of discuss some of the topics of the swinger world and I guess expectations because the Joneses had been three times. It's their third time. Third event, yeah. So two previous events and kind of, again, just filled us in on expectations of the week.

And I guess, yeah, we just sat there and, I guess, chatted generally about swinger topics, as you do. I've got to say, at this point, we were probably, both of us, well, certainly I was, I was still a little bit, I don't know, settling into the mood of the event, I suppose, would be the best way to put it, after two weeks of traveling through the rest of the U.S. So, yeah, it was good to sort of find some bearings with some guys who'd had some previous experience with the event. And I might add the Joneses are just, well, I mean, they're fucking awesome. They are awesome. Yeah.

So shout out to you, Pear. Actually, and just real quick before we move on, but I got to see The Stupid Card Game. Yeah. Which I was pretty excited about. And for those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, go listen to the podcast. You've got about, I think, about 30-odd casts that they've done that you've got to catch up on. Well, but The Stupid Card Game is mentioned in quite a few of the recent ones. Yes, and it's not that stupid. It's not stupid, but that's Mr. Jones. He thought it was stupid. He was wrong. And he freely admits that. Thank you.

game is mentioned in quite a few of the recent ones so um and it's not that stupid it's not stupid no that's mr jones he thought it was stupid he was wrong and he freely admits that yes that it worked no he still says it's stupid but it works still works yeah yeah but that's okay they're stupid if it's stupid and works then hey hey you know no one's finding that outcome absolutely which is cool it was really nice to meet them it was um unfortunately that, well, not unfortunate, I shouldn't say that, but we had some of our very good friends from Australia coming in as well.

So, the law and baby doll from our secret spot in Sydney, their flight was delayed. They ended up coming in quite late, 11, 11.30? Yeah, something like that. I don't know what it was. Anyway, so we excused ourselves. So we ran out on the Joneses and went and caught up with those guys because we hadn't seen them in four months because we actually moved from Australia or from Sydney to Singapore. Well, I hadn't seen them in four months. You were about three. Yeah. So, yes, we wanted to catch up with those guys. So we went out for a quick bite to – well, not a bite to eat. They ate.

We just sat there and drank. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's what we did. Yeah. Which was fun. Nice to see them. It was good to catch up with them. And, again, we kind of spoke about the week and kind of planned things out, talked about what things we might want to go to and started to kind of get the idea of how things would shape up, I guess. Yeah, absolutely. So it was really nice to catch up with those guys.

And again, if you're in Sydney, and I know the Laura and Babydoll did their best to let anyone know who was interested or who may have been coming down to Sydney what the best swingers club in Sydney is, and we will fully back them on that. And drop them an email, jump on the website there. They'll respond to you. I'll see, next day. So we were in the background also kind of tweeting to all of the other people that were attending the event, all the podcasters mostly, it started out as. Yeah.

And there was a Twitter group happening, and so we did a shout-out that we were heading to breakfast, basically, and does anyone want to join us? And, well, Jay and Angie were the only two other people up at this point in time, I think. Some people hit it pretty hard on the first night. Yeah, you've got to be careful not to overshoot night one. Yeah. Some people were out until, like, 5 and 6 in the morning. Yeah. And you could certainly tell. They weren't getting out of bed until three the next day. Can I say, though, that seemed to be a fairly consistent thing.

People were – well, generally people were out until very late and didn't get out of bed until also very late. But that's okay because nothing really started until what was – Yeah was 10 10 10 a.m there was some stuff but if you were looking if you were there to party then realistically it was sort of three o'clock right right so you would kind of skip forego the morning sessions yeah but anyway so what happened then was we had the opportunity to actually hang out with uh with Jay and Angie and we went for breakfast and then we kind of walked around.

They came back to our room and we had some drinks and joking around. And we spent a lot of time just talking shit. Just chewing the fat. Yeah.

So there's actually – so I know Jay had their microphone or their recording device set up basically from when we sat down and then we did a bit of a we did a bit of an interview on our side um which so we'll see who gets around to editing their uh their recorded items first because well i mean we have three hours of of rambling i'm gonna say it's rambling yeah there's a lot of rambling you well you said you were going to edit that one i i don't recall that yeah and i don't. And I don't believe there's any proof of such a statement. But it was good, actually.

And we kind of then just followed on from the drinking and having lunch, but essentially then... Hang on, we forgot that we educated them. Did you? Well, maybe de-educated? Maybe they kind of know what happens in a sack. Oh, sorry, you were talking about something else? Yeah, just the Australianisms. Uh-huh. But that's okay. Right, okay. Well, after lunch, Angie, we basically... There was a long silence there. Yeah, it was. We were heading to, there's a ladies meet and greet, and for the life of me, I can't remember what the, do you know what it is?

Oh, ladies uncorked event and that was just basically, as the name suggests, it was just ladies in the lifestyle getting together and having a wine. Now, we went to the event and I had to line up, I'm going to say, for like 20, 25 minutes just to get a glass of wine. Yeah. um i think I think the ladies uncorked event and the male version of that, which is where the guys just got together and drank and waited for the ladies to finish. How long did you wait for a drink? Well, I didn't. Yeah, see? Because half the men didn't go. True.

Yeah, I mean, when you go to a swingers event, generally the guys don't want to stand around in a group of... Gaggle. A gaggle of men? Yeah, just because it sounds funny. Okay. So generally the guys don't want to sit around in a gaggle of men that, you know, generally wanting to be involved with perhaps... The ladies? Yeah. Right. So needless to say, I had one beverage and actually Babydoll at this point had arrived. Quite timely of her, actually. As I arrived at the bar, she just appeared out of nowhere in a cloud of smoke. So, quite strategic on her behalf. And so, we actually left.

We caught back up with you and decided to just go for another bar. And there was an interesting bar. Yeah. Well, it was actually one of the bars later in the week that was an event bar, a takeover bar. Which we had no idea about. Which I cannot for the life of me remember the name of. I do. Bourbon Cowboy or Cowboy Bowboy. Bourbon. Bourbon Cowboy. Yeah. Except that it has a… Bucking ball. Bucking ball in the back. in the background. Mechanical bull.

Which the guy, the host there, was desperately trying to get somebody up on the mechanical bull, and he ended up taking one of the other ladies who happened to also be part of the Naughty in New Orleans event, up onto the bull. So she had a bit of a ride, and then I actually bought. Well, the thing is, though, I've been wanting to try riding the bull now for years. Yeah. Years and years, over 10 years. Yeah. And I never had the guts to. Yeah. See, I knew you wouldn't, so I just bought you and babyoll tickets. So I got up there. The law hadn't arrived yet.

He was elsewhere, but then he was coming, so we wanted to leave Babydoll to ride the bull until he got there. We both did pretty darn well, but I guess we actually spotted another couple, a Canadian couple, leaning against the bar. And, you know, I mean, you have to include some people sometimes. Well, you've got to remember that I suppose something we didn't explain is that everyone involved in Nordic New Orleans has a lanyard on because you can't leave – well, you can leave the hotel, but you can't get back into the hotel. Or into any of the seminars, bars.

Or any of the events or bars unless you're wearing the lanyard. It's a quite identifiable one too. It was purple, so you can kind of see it quite clearly. Which is good, I think. Yeah, yeah. So we noticed them and, you know, some people don't necessarily like to be the first people to walk over and interrupt a conversation. So I actually went over there and asked them back to our table. And the funny thing about that was they had assumed that, well, Dee had miraculously managed to have a girlfriend and a unicorn and that we were in some sort of polyamorous lifestyle.

So they actually had been talking about us for the half an hour previous and discussing how bloody awesome Dee must be to have two hot women by his side. Which is totally the case. Dee is awesome. Mm-hmm. That is all. See, this is where I need that sound app again so I can play the crickets. I'm going to download that before this podcast is over. Well, didn't you... I mean, you just told everyone how you happen to be one of the hot women that Dee was hanging on to. I mean, you know... Yeah. Okay, sweet. Now, that was an interesting night because obviously many, many drinks were had.

Now, this particular night was actually the March. Yes. The Swedish March. So it was Dressed to Impress Night. Parade. Yeah. March.

march yeah tell me what you thought about that well look i gotta say that the event that particular event itself was i'm gonna say reasonably unorganized okay now the reason i say that is is when it started it was it was just basically us walking down a road dressed to impress now were there that is is when it started it was it it was just basically us walking down a road dressed to impress now were there at any point did you at any point have a have a pull the piss or have a go at somebody about the dress to impress i did and it's really funny because the law's not here but um He said I was on fire that night.

Somebody walked up and complimented you, and I may have said to them, well, it is dress to impress, but the way the law said apparently that I did it was dress to impress, dress to impress. Well, that was probably more, that's probably closer, more aligned to the truth. Really. Okay. Yeah. So there was, there was, there were people that were in tank tops and cargo pants. Yeah. I mean, I wasn't impressed. Some people might've been impressed.

Look, you've got to say the majority of the, majority of the group was in Dress to Impress, I think, but there was certainly a lot of people who, there was certainly a minority who weren't.

Now they may have taken D taken dress to impress in a different manner to what we did in terms of showing off more of their bodies as a dress to impress which is fine i mean i don't think a sexy dress to impress would have offended anybody it was more the people who just hadn't put any effort in at all yeah right um but i mean to your point though the parade it did feel a little bit unorganized i think think actually at the end of the parade, our little group was standing there, I'm going to say for 15 minutes. Yeah, just wondering what was going on.

Not realising the parade had actually finished and it was time to move into one of the bars because there was no one really directing traffic. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, that was, look, that was probably exactly what I was talking about when I was saying it felt a little unorganized. The rest of the event, though, felt quite organized. I think, you know, the... The club was busy. The club was busy. The club was too busy. Crazy busy. But look, to the guys' defense who organized this, I think they've got more than one club now that they organize these events in. So they've realized that, you know...

One venue's they generally have one possibly two overflow venues going and different different things all happening too so on this particular night there was one venue with oh some hot djs remember those two guys yes i remember i remember you talking about them yes yeah and uh and then the other venue was doing some karaoke. So kind of, you know, mixing it up for people who want different things. You, for some reason, decided to get a temporary tattoo on your ass, which didn't come off for like three days. Yeah. I can't remember what that was. Do you remember what it was? Quiver.

Quiver, that's right. Yes. Nice, nice. It was really quite difficult to get off.

So well done to the quiver folk out there you did well i could not get it off my ass for the next three days actually it was longer than that it was about probably four days but yes ended up getting getting it off um but yes so we stayed there for not long actually because it was it was too full it was too busy for us And frankly, know you guys don't know this but i'm i'm of country folk origin so um 1800 swingers in one location where there's no room and you're really moving as one humongous jelly i mean it comes down to ease of ease of access to drinks um actually having some room to move as well people people running into you spilling their drinks on you because other people are pushing them i mean that just got too hard that's where it was like but um at this point i don't know that we realized there were two other locations that we could have went to that night no and so actually um lauren babydoll said you know we're getting it out of here let's all go go.

So we started making our way back to the hotel with the idea that we were going to the swingers club. Yeah. And then so we ended up getting back to the hotel basically and this was the night, if I do recall, correct me if I'm wrong, but that basically we didn't make it back out of the bedroom. No, that's right. Is that the night? Yeah, it was. There was a lot of... Do you want to run us through that night? Well, there'd been a lot of sexy talk and a lot of... You know, groin pushing. Grinding and rubbing.

You know, you can get away with a lot more inappropriate grabbing of both C and potentially other people in the room when there's uh when it's a swingers event so um all consensual of course all last first if there was grabbing just to clarify but um yeah so we ended up going back up to the room and frankly um i just wanted to shag the pants off you and that's what happened not a not a bad way to go no i think it was quite a good way to go you certainly my favorite way to go no detail for the listeners no detail at all oh okay i'll give you something Jesus. So that. That's a ta-da.

I got that downloaded. So we went up to the room and C was also obviously feeling a little splooshy judging by the. The DJs won me over. Yeah. Judging by what happened that night. So we had brought some stuff with us, some toys with us and also a a flogger, a small aluminium-handled whip, which is actually designed to be a dildo as well. So we were – C actually bent over the bed and asked to be whipped with the flogger, which I was happy to oblige. So there was a little bit of that going on.

And then, you know, we got obviously from there, there was a little bit of movement more toward the sex. I went down on C and then she, as she quite regularly does, says it's time for you to get a condom um i've i've found some one thing i have learned about my partner over the over the two weeks is that she is typically the first person in the group to be sick of foreplay and ready to get shagged so um we uh at that point c said get the condom so i went So I went and got the condom and then we decided that that night might be the best night for anal sex. So I proceeded to slip myself.

So this is where I want to interject. At the time, I was thinking this is a good idea.

let's go with some sort of like double penetration deal with the whipping dildo like whipping whipping slash dildo item and d now that was not exactly the most comfortable thing in the world so I just want to throw it out there for any ladies considering it maybe get something that's not so straight shaped uh if you want to kind of have some some of that play because um yeah it just wasn't really working for me so backed right out of that scenario and um just kind of continued to have a really raunchy crazy night together actually so yeah absolutely i mean um i think the like you said the the dildo that we were using was too too straight too firm yeah but we did have a little bit of uh dp there but not not um what you're hoping for i think so um so we actually i don't know what time we ended up in bed that night but uh basically we sent any sent a message to la and Babydoll saying that, yep, we are out for the count.

I think the wording was, we were going to come back out, but Dee pounced me or Dee cornered me. Yeah. Yeah. Now, the next morning, though, was, I think it was the early morning. Actually, it Yeah. We had an early morning start, and this was actually one of the seminars that we attended, and it was hosted by the Joneses. Yes. And we were – I mean, we're intrigued by it mainly because it's the Joneses, but then secondly to that, they had titled their seminar or their talk, it was about rules and boundaries.

which we thought was also quite interesting content and of course we you know you go along and um and listen and participate as an audience and i'm sure that they're probably going to be talking about this they've just released a new podcast tonight about naughty new ones i haven't listened to it yet but um i'm sure they'll probably be talking about the rules and boundaries uh on there but do you know what i thought was interesting from that first event that we that we sort of figured out throughout the rest of the the time in naughty the joneses seem to attract the most attractive attractive people oh my god you guys i mean high five yourselves yeah i mean you're seriously magnets to um to hot people i would say like 80 percent of the people in the room were the only people that i was attracted to out of the whole event yeah there were some hotties in there um and i might add some hotties some lovely people some of which we'll cover off soon as well in terms of the fact that they were nice enough to show us around New Orleans after the event.

But, yeah, it was really spectacular to see that group of people all in one room. Yeah, and I don't want to give the game away, but what they talk about is that rules are your hard and fast rules there. They're non-moving, non-changing. Non-negotiables. Whereas your boundaries are perhaps things that might be changed, adapted, grey areas where perhaps they would flux based on conversations and communication that's occurring. So some really, really interesting stuff. Again, I don't want to overshadow the fact that that's their topic and I'm sure they'll be covering that in their podcast.

Yeah, really well thought out. Really well thought out. I mean, we were lucky enough to get a bit of a precursor to it the night before when we caught up with them. They gave us a bit of a rundown on what they were covering.

But, yeah, it was really – actually, all of the seminars we went to, I have to say, the ones we went to were all very good, very well thought out, interesting content, interesting people, well- well spoken um you know individuals that covered that off excellent yeah so i i enjoyed that i really enjoyed that and that gives an opportunity i guess to start meeting some of the other people as well um just just briefly i think i've actually got my timelines mixed up now though why is that about which seminar came first um i can't remember if actually the meet and greet was first the meet and greet was after the bucking bull yeah it was bucking bull meet and greet march yeah so we actually went to the joneses meet and greet as well so yeah a lot of the again a lot of the people throughout the the period whenever the joneses were the room, there seemed to be a lot of attractive people in that room.

So, yeah, there's something going on there. But that was a fun event. A lot of their listeners came along to that event, you know, got to talk to them and ask them questions and kind of just a bit of a coming together of people. So, look, Joneses listeners are hot. So, you know, if you manage to run into any of them, they're generally all quite attractive, which is great news for anyone who listens to the Joneses. Because if you are listening to the Joneses, by default, from what I just said, it means you're hot. I'm going to say it. I'm throwing that out there. All right.

Well, I'm going to stick with seminars because clearly I can't keep my timeline straight.

So, what I'm going to do is I to stick with seminars i'm going to talk about the night events separately yeah we're rolling from there because otherwise i'm just going to be wrong well the night events are all very similar right we went out we we um generally went to a the location that was specified as part of the tour yeah yeah um and we had drinks so we also had a podcasting q a panel um which i think was friday morning because we were all laughing about the fact that you know they've put the podcast as q a panel on a friday morning are they almost setting us up for failure we weren't actually on the panel um we we got up and actually got some coffee um for the jones has actually and delivered it because of the early nature of the panel but that too um listening to tna from the curious couple had also grown in style the joneses said it had grown in size yeah absolutely so i think year prior and i have listened to the podcast and i think it might have been jay and angie yeah they mentioned there was six people yeah there was only maybe six or eight people there um but this year uh there would have been i want to say 30 to 40 maybe even 40 and for that time of the morning that's a pretty impressive turnout for an event like this it is um there are a lot of people that said a lot of awfully kind things about the podcasters who were up presenting.

Yeah. I mean, I think everything that was said in that room was really well said also. You know, there's a lot of interesting takes on the different people and how they podcast the different podcasters themselves.

You know, and everyone seems to be carving out a little niche that seems to work for them and uh yeah we well certainly for us there was we were quite starstruck i'm gonna say with the people that were in the room i mean we were starstruck when we first saw um jay and ang in the lobby and then we were starstruck when we caught up with with um the joneses after that as well well like everyone i guess that, when you listen to people's podcasts, you're kind of listening to their life and their intimate details and their stories.

So you do have, I mean, you feel like you've got a sense of them as an individual. We also learnt that I have no game when I'm in a room with people that I admire. Yeah, no game. No game whatsoever. It's the first time I've ever seen him game free. And the problematic thing for that, for me, is that he normally has to lift my game because I suck at game. And so he's there kind of lifting the game up for both of us. Oh, my God, it was terrible. Overflow of his game into my game, which kind of gives us on par. Yeah, I'm normally 150% game, which gives you 50%. Right. Maybe 70%.

And then we have this level off. But I was game free. Anyone that I admired. Or that you found very, very attractive. I'm going to throw that out there. I was absolutely game free with. The other thing to keep in mind, though, this event for me was quite overwhelming.

It was a big event'll cover something off in a minute i had a bit of a bit of a brain yeah a bit of a brain explosion we're 30 minutes in we need to start kind of get into some interesting parts as well none of this has been interesting well i don't know people will be the judge of that as as jay and i spoke about when's the hate mail coming? Yeah, absolutely. Another interesting day event we went to was the bondage, so bondage for beginners. That was a really good seminar.

That particular guy who hosts it, again, we were picking seminars where they weren't really about people selling stuff to us. Of course, you can go to other seminars where the host wants to sell their particular brand of ropes or whatever the case may be he was actually just doing it because that's what he likes to do he likes to share his knowledge with everyone and he had an interesting spin on it that it was more about the safety and security um during the bondage beginning bondage and i i'm i bet there was people in that audience that were thinking they were going to see somebody spanked.

Yeah. And there was no spanking to be had. No, no spanking nor really any binding. It was more just how not to fuck up. And also, you know, he showed us some of the things that he uses. So, I mean, I thought it was quite informative and quite well done. Yeah, I would agree. Absolutely. As I said, all the things we went to were quite good.

Now hypno session let's talk about that real quick that was a night sessions but I'm going to talk about it anyway there was a um a hypnotherapist would you that's I'm pretty sure that's what they call them um yeah I'm gonna say hypnosis magicianists I don't know so there was I'm just gonna say hypnotist because I'm pretty sure he's not a therapist. Okay. So this hypnotist came in and actually he needed a sidekick, so Babydoll actually had volunteered for that. Well, can I say that Jay had put a lot of effort into finding said sidekick for the event.

And Babydoll was up there, so of course we were going along to watch her more so. I mean, I wasn't at that point particularly interested in seeing the show. I just wanted to go see Babydoll and kind of support her. Your mind changed fairly quickly once you got to the show. Oh, God, it was hilarious. Yeah. So they had a panel of people, would you say 15 people up there? Yeah. About 15. Some volunteers, others hadn't volunteered up front. They had meditated during the session and had gone into a sleep-like state. The law. The law. At which point they were then taken up on stage to participate.

The law was fully passed out. All right. So at this point you've got Babydoll and the law, a couple. Babydoll's volunteering and is quite clear and can see everything that's going on. And the Law is under a spell, I guess. Yeah, under hypnosis. So it was really interesting to see what happened with him when, for example, his penis was lost. Yes. His penis got cut he... No, I don't think it got cut off. It went missing or something. Yeah, your penis has gone missing. And actually, the funny thing to me about this scenario was that... We figured out who we want to be in a zombie apocalypse with.

Yes, so there was two standouts during that particular situation and one of them was kind of also hanging around with our group and they're another couple that we met at the event. I believe they're called Swapping the Suburbs on Twitter. And his reaction was to quite literally bound off his chair, fall to his knees, throw the arms up in the air and scream out no. Whereas the law very calmly started to walk around the room and search for his missing penis.

Now, he came up to our table, looked underneath the tablecloth, but the next funny thing was that he actually looked under a dress of the Swappin' in the Suburbs wife and then proceeded to ask us where his penis was. We suggested it was across the other side of the room and again, quite calmly started going and searching around the other side of the room.

So TL made it to the, sorry, TL, the law made it to the door, the exit door of the building at the other end of the building by the time the hypnosis, hip hypnosis i don't know whatever yeah by the time by the time he was dragged back in okay yeah and then that's the point we want to make about the whole zombie apocalypse thing because that just goes to show you who can deal under pressure in a stressful situation. When zombies are attacking, we want TL in our corner because even if he loses his penis, he's still not going to be running around, arms flailing. Exactly.

He'll just be still killing off the zombies. Now, also, the stop in the suburbs had a bit of a raw deal on this particular event because next thing, he was a world-famous stripper and worth ten thousand dollars for a strip and another gentleman was from the crowd was actually caught up on stage and he was working it oh man from what i was working it he was twerking it but he was uh he got fully nude he got buck naked buck naked he was pelvic thrusting like no one's business. And even doing the, what would you call that, the lasso movement where you wave your penis in a circle. So good event.

Yes, great event. A little bit sexy as well. I mean, there was a talk about, you know, show how you would give head, I think was one of the other things. You know hilarious hilarious kind of swinger swinger related topics or lifestyle sexual related topics I think it was certainly for the time I was in the room it was a very good very good event so what did we do that night? when did we catch up with T&O? Was that that night? No. No. Next night. That was the blackout night. Oh, that's right. And this was also where we were going to go to the club Colette in New Orleans. Yay.

See, remember the name. It's Colette. But this is where you might want to... Sorry, Colette. Let's... This is when you had your freak out.

Yeah freak out yeah so i'm gonna let you take the field on this so at this point with 1800 people in the room generally and later on after the event we found out 150 mattresses in in one room um i was feeling a little overwhelmed i actually had made the decision that i didn't think the event was for me and it was time for us to leave the reason behind that was i was twofold um i suppose we we'd only run into a small number of people that we're interested in i would say and the other thing is well actually it's threefold the other thing is we like to get to know people before we run off into the bedroom with them and it was very hard to do that in this environment because you're typically you're running around between people trying to um trying to talk um and you know you're hearing everyone's background story and they start to become convoluted overlapped and you know you start embarrassing yourself when you when you go back through what you believe their background story was and the um so what was that that was two reasons the third one has totally slipped my mind but um mainly the the problem was it was just too many people in one location well i mean you also you you went to the point of actually thinking that the lifestyle was no longer for us it wasn't just the event you started to think the fact that we hadn't played with anybody else up until this point um and you were kind of wondering whether or not it's for us yeah well look i i think we we discussed this at the event, I actually came out and said that it wasn't due to the fact that we hadn't played with anyone else.

But that's your thought on it. You do believe that it was because we hadn't played that I thought it was... I think it made it seem bigger.

If we had some play time, I i think certainly the fact that we hadn't hadn't even been involved in the lifestyle for four months up to this event yeah didn't help us because neither of us yeah we just kind of went to the deep end there and we went straight into the deep end and that really didn't work for me yeah i didn't like it took a bit to get up and running i think yeah and um perhaps that's that perhaps that explains somewhat why i had no game when i was in yeah yeah people that all you know that were well not all there to shag but certainly were interested in shagging but yeah the the um the event overwhelmed me there's no doubt about that um and because of that because of the size of the event, I can say that I will never go back.

And that's my take on it. I mean, I know you feel somewhat differently, but for me it's just too big an event. It's too big for me to swallow. Yeah, and I think also the demographic of the event as well perhaps wasn't where we would normally like to see it be. Well, I think it was just an older group. It was an older group at the event. Now, there's no issue with that, please understand. It was just more that we were, you know, we went into this. Interestingly, it's something we have missed. We went into this event, certainly you, with predefined age limitations.

Yeah, and we've spoken about this before, how my age brackets have flexed quite substantially. Well, yeah, substantially. And I think, again, they've stretched or they've changed again. I'm not going to say stretched, but they've certainly changed again from this event. Well, yeah. And so for me, I mean, it's also taking care of yourself, making an effort when you're out. I mean, in life, in everything that you do. I think that was probably the biggest thing.

Rather than the age bracket, let me clarify, because I think I've actually gotten it wrong there when i first said it's not it's nothing to do with the age what it typically had to do with is that the ladies were typically very well dressed size whatever size they were whatever shape they were they were well dressed they were melt well manicured they'd um you know they'd either either put some tan on or or had some or been out in the sun for a while they had their makeup on the hair done everything to look really nice and then the guys majority of them i've got to say didn't appear to put any effort in whatsoever looks lazy they looked lazy you know you see a lady in a i'm gonna say say middle late 60s walking through a group in a nice black dress, black heels, hair done, makeup done.

And then a guy following her in sandals with socks, cargo pants and a ratty old T-shirt.

You know, I mean, frankly, I couldn't put C in the position even though I was even though I looked around at this point I'm just contemplating stealing the lady away yeah I mean I look around the room and I see I see many ladies that I find attractive of all age groups and the men that typically were following them were not and I wouldn't put you in that position which is interesting actually because i don't know whether whether it was just because there was a larger population so you saw that more or whether would you say that that happens in australia would you say that absolutely i would say i wouldn't say it's the norm but it's certainly um it's a higher prevalence than the equally balanced couple.

But I wouldn't, it's a higher prevalence than, you know, the equally balanced couple. Okay. But I wouldn't say it's anywhere near that level. I mean, I would say that the grouping that was there, 70 odd percent of the entire group, the lady was significantly more well put together.

And I say that because I don't just mean more attractive, I just mean more well together had made an effort than the guys were so guys i mean shit pull up your socks no don't pull your socks off stop wearing sandals put together an outfit make an effort make an effort and not just for actually i'm gonna go off on a rant here but not just for my sake but for your wife's sake i mean spark that relationship up you know you should you should be doing that for each other making each other feel loved sexy and and you better damn well be telling your woman how attractive she is because i can tell you what the rest of us are yeah the the people that we found in in the group that we ended up you know i suppose hanging out with they were the balanced couples yeah and there were the guys who put in the effort you know the girls and guys who put in the effort don't get me wrong there were there were ladies they hadn't put in the effort as well but in the like you're talking majority yeah a very small minority versus the guys so i throw this challenge out to all the men on the planet step up your game you know if you're if you're with an attractive beautiful intelligent lady um you best look somewhere near similar that otherwise at some point she's going to get sick of your badly dressed dumpy and find somebody else that'll do the job for her.

Right. So that concludes the rant today, the rant portion of the podcast. I actually want to talk about just two of the other parties as well. So we actually managed to make it to a day takeover, and that was the Swamp. We went to the Swamp party. Now, Ellie from the Aussie Swingers was was there hanging out beads if you exposed your breast? Or let her wrap it around your penis. Or let her wrap it around your penis. They were big beads. I've got to say that up front. Uh-huh, sure. Big beads.

Well, look, I said to her when she was doing it, I said, you know, she went three wraps in her hand before she grabbed said penis to put it on. And I said to her, she was going to go another one. I said, if you go another one, you're going to have to actually do some work here to get the fourth set of beads on. And if you do enough work, you'll eventually get a few more runs of beads on. But that was it. We got to set four. So you were wearing beads around outside your pants for the rest of the was, uh, that was, that was it. We got to set four.

So you were wearing beads around, outside your pants for the rest of the evening? Yes, I was. My favorite event though would have to be this. Oh, well, you got your tits out as well. I said that. Well, no, you didn't. I did. You said that they were giving them out. You didn't say you'd actually done it. Okay. By the way, I might add, I also may have put a set of beads around A's neck that evening. Okay. I saw her boobs. I didn't know that. There you go. No, sorry. I actually forgot to mention that. I don't know why.

I don't know how you managed to forget that considering that you have a little bit of crush on lovely A. Yeah, look, I mean, can I say that that's at least one of the couples that I was in a room with and had zero game. Zero game. My God. Yeah, so my favourite night was actually the superheroes night or superheroes and villains night. Yeah. So we had fun getting dressed up. Everyone was looking real sexy that night though, I have to say. People put in effort. I had contact lenses in. Yeah, you did – so I went as Riddick.

If you don't know who that is, then you need to step up to this millennia when it comes to your movie choices and your villain slash hero choices. I'm being bitter and twisted. Okay. Let's bring it up a notch. Let's kick some positivity back into this podcast. So I had contact lenses in that are actually mirrored. Now, what this did was polarize any woman in the room. They were either like, oh, my God, your eyes are awesome. Let's go to the room right now or get the fuck away from me. Get the fuck away from me and stop trying to steal my bag and or rape me, basically.

So certainly Ellie from the Aussie Swingers fell into that, oh, my God, get away from me. Oh, yeah, she was not great on that at all. She was not okay with it at all. She was very black and white on that whole situation. Actually, I'm just thinking about it now, and all the women that I found attractive at that event, they all hated it, so I'm not really sure what I was doing. I was dressed up as like a super girl. Slutty super girl. But the next thing is actually embarrassing slash funny. I met Holly and Michael from Playboy Swing or Playboy TV or Playboy Radio.

And Angie was nice enough to introduce you to them. Yeah. Now, I don't know for anyone who's been listening to us ramble now for a year on our podcast two years you would know that actually watching playboy swing is how we kind of started working our way into the lifestyle so for me having, having seen these people and listened to them and kind of taken hints and tips. You can just smell the fangirl on her right now, can't you? Well, it was exciting. Oh, my God, wasn't it? And they're really, really lovely people. I'm going to say double sploosh. It was a double sploosh for you.

You nearly slipped over in your own sploosh. They're lovely. They are. So I got to talk to them. I was pretty happy about it. Well, they talked to you. You didn't really say much in return. It was more like a... That's not true. I had a good conversation about baking and the country and so forth. She was really struggling to round out her sentences. Yeah. In the fact that she couldn't make any. No, that's not true. It's true. It's totally true. It was awkward for everyone. Although Thank you. It was awkward for everyone.

Although it did get a lot more awkward a little later on when Babydoll decided to drag Holly around the room. Babydoll may have had one or two beverages. Yeah, she's only teeny tiny.

Yeah, and she was dragging Holly around the the room there was a little discussion on apologies later that week and i'm pretty sure they managed to get the apologies done it was a funny night it was a great night yes now other than that um so for us i mean just we enjoyed meeting people and the sense of community my god leaving that place was horrible the last night the last night so we actually we weren't going to go to the last event by this point in time we're actually evented out we're done with events but we had a talking to ourselves and we went only for one reason to catch up and say goodbye to the people that we'd met the people that we'd met there and i can tell you it was a little bit of a heart stringer yeah it was it was certainly um it was a lot tougher than i was expecting we we'd met again you know you hear the names and podcasters and stuff that we run through there that we'd met during the event and additionally there were a number of other people that we've we've sort of you know breezed over here uh couples who were you know really nice really fantastic individuals that we would have liked to have spent a lot more time with in fact what we would have liked to have done is taken the people that we enjoyed the company of and brought them to desire for the next week yeah and Yeah, and kind of met them earlier in the event and just done our own thing as well.

I mean, I would have been equally happy with that. Which is why I think if you were to do this event, first year is going, it's always going to be, you're going to be a flower on a wall. You know, you're going to be a wallflower because you just don't have the time to meet the people, get to know them, especially if you're socio-sexuals. Right, so that's what I'm saying. It depends on what you want. If you're a bedpost notcher, good Lord, go nuts. Yeah. You know, there's 1,800 people there that all want – well, not all, but a lot of them want to notch their bed as well.

So certainly there's a lot of – it's a target-rich's a target rich environment let's say that yeah so saying goodbye was hard um on the last night that we also got to spend a little bit more time with a podcasting couple yeah two couples actually so podcasting couple and another couple but that we hadn't that we hadn't um spent a lot of time with and um they are that couple next door their twitter handle is that cpl next door they're fairly new to the podcasting uh realm but um from listening to some of their five in i think listening to some of their podcasts on the way home they're definitely doing a bit of a raunchy take on it though yeah we like it um but they're great people and sexy and intelligent and why didn't we meet them properly on the first day?

That's absolutely right. Such a shame. He's into cars like I am as well, so that kind of helps. And he has a sexy wife. Yeah. Like he said, you can shag my wife but you can't drive my car, I was a lot. Yeah. That was actually probably it. But yes, we do look forward to catching up with those guys again. We do. At some stage in the future. We met another couple, or properly again that night, got to spend some time with them, a local New Orleans couple. And actually, we were lucky enough the next day for them to take us around New Orleans and have a couple of beers and a lovely dinner with.

Yeah, it was really nice. Swap stories as well. Yeah, but understanding again, no game. You had no game? No game. I was game free. Game free. Yeah, it's weird. Well, certainly I know C did as well. We certainly, the last two couples we've spoken of, we certainly enjoyed their company and probably would have liked to enjoy their company a little more. I'd like to enjoy their company naked. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So unfortunately, though, it was not to be. And we got on our plane to, well, we got on our plane to Mexico. Mm-hmm, Exactly. Yeah. Now, during – Boo to that shit.

We've kind of just grazed over a bit. We actually managed to interview T&A from The Curious Couple, and we're going to edit that and put that up online as well. Curious Couple also, I don't know, do you want to tell them about the history with The Curious Couple? Well, I mean, Curious Couple was the first podcast, I think. First one that you haven't downloaded. Yeah. So with those guys, again, certainly I was a bit starstruck. We played tag quite a lot to catch up because, you know, I think it was their first event as well, First Naughty.

It so we're all all over the place trying to trying to cover out off everything that was going on um so yeah that it was it was great to finally catch up with them it was really nice to interview them they are sexy yes they are like really sexy and they've both got great smiles as well yeah it. It's a little bit intimidating, actually. Yeah. That's probably why you had no game. Why? Because they're too sexy for me. They're too sexy for your shirt. Thankfully, we now do have, C has downloaded a noise maker thing. I do. So we no longer have to put up with her relentless singing.

So there was, yes, so T and A as well were great to catch up with Also we had breakfast with Ellie and Al Ellie and Al You always muddle your vowels there Ellie and Al There you go It's the Australian version From the Aussie swingers Also came over from Australia So we got to catch up with just so many great people and again I'm going to bring it on back to the fact that it's a really good community and the fact that there's no judgement you can say what you feel or think you can talk about stories share stories, have a laugh it's all very sexy even the ones that aren't sexy Jane and Angie are just an absolute blast to hang out with as well, they're funny as hell love them cunts I don't know.

I mean... Even the ones that aren't sexy. Jane and Angie are just an absolute blast to hang out with as well. They're funny as hell. Love them cunts. Where's the beep on this thing? I'm sure there's like a beep button and I can take that out. There's a whole back end to the dropping of the C-bomb. But yes, we enjoyed everyone's company while we were there. One interesting takeaway. What is it? What do you got? We did not play with anyone the entire event. No. There was one night as well, which is funny because this has happened quite a few times recently actually. Yeah.

Where I've woken up in the middle of the night, not been able to get back to sleep and have decided that I'm just going to pounce you. Yes. Not too bad on your end. We played together quite a bit. We didn't involve anyone else. Now, I think that personally that had a lot to do with me in terms of my headspace at the time. I wasn't really ready for that to be the case, mainly because we'd been apart for a month prior to this. I just wasn't ready to give her up. Fair enough. As T would say, I had the keys to the Ferrari and I wasn't giving them to anyone else. Oh, that's good.

So that's it for Naughty New Orleans. You said before you wouldn't go back for the sheer size of the event? Yeah, look, I think it would take some – if I was going back there to Naughty New Orleans, it would also involve some other things. Again, the trip to Desire was good afterward, and we'll cover that out in our next podcast. Yeah. If you lived in the States, would you go back? Oh, yeah, absolutely.

Yeah, so something to take into consideration for the guys out there listening is that, you know, when we come to these things, it's a $15,000 to $20,000 investment, you know, while we're over there. And it's a long flight. It's 24 hours on the plane. It's a debacle. Australians or Singaporeans don't come to the U.S. for a week.

So when we take that into consideration, that's where we're like, well, weigh it up, measure it up up would we love to see the podcasters again absolutely and uh actually are we considering trying to get back to the states and get everyone into an area just so we can all catch up with the sexiness yes we are trying to we need to wrangle wrangle an event where we get everyone back together just because we all seem to talk immense amounts of shit so once you get us all together it's just a you know it's a shit fight that sounds delightful sign up now get your tickets the best i can do but yes it was um it was a if we were living closer certainly we would i think we'd attend probably every year.

But having to make that commitment to come from Australia or Singapore, 20 hours, 24 hours, it's just, it's a tough one for us. Yeah. And I think there's other ways that we would rather, other events, other locations that we would rather go to that perhaps had some people, more percentage of people that were our kind of people. Yeah.

So I feel the i feel the same way actually i don't think that i would go back unless either it changes or we lived in the u.s or you know which which you know we're saying in the next few years may be the case as well we may actually live in the u.s so you never know you do never know but we a couple of things we firstly we have we did an interview with uh tna from the curious couple um which we've discussed here we will well when i say we i will be editing that hopefully in the next couple of days it's not three hours of footage for jay and angie but it's actually about an hour and a half because we just left the microphones on.

But wheels, that also had a spontaneous, I guess, walk in from the law. So I'll see if I can get some snapshots out of that and piece them all together and, you know, put that up in the next 10 years for you guys. And additionally, we've only covered our first sexy week in the US. We have one more to go.

We have one more to go, which we will cover cover out very shortly and that will be all about desire so thanks for listening we know this is a really long podcast but we just wanted to give you guys an idea of i guess what this event is like um especially for those people considering going you know our followers from south of the equator um that's our experiences of course yours may be different but um hey and if you've got any questions about the event i mean as you always know that this is just a broad brush understanding of what happened at the event you know we didn't cover out everything that we did because some things would put everyone to sleep but um yeah if you've got any questions you know are.

Yep. So email is cnd at swingingdownunder.com. You can get us on. That's our group one. That's our group one, yeah. Or go to the website. Go to the website. Swingingdownunder.com. The whole thing. Have a look at us there. Grab whatever email address you'd like from there and flick us one so we can help you understand it. But otherwise, again, thanks for listening and we'll chat to you all soon. This is C. I forgot one thing before we do our sign-off. You can't, but I did the This is C. No, I know, but I'm cutting it.

So we got an email from one of our listeners with a theme song that I have not yet actually um uh i have not yet actually incorporated into this into our um podcast we will do that at some stage in the future and a shout out to him thank you very much for the theme we'll um we'll get that up sometime soon now go well i feel like it's already gone now just no this is c this is d and this is swinging down under