Inside a Swingers Hotel Takeover: Real Couple Stories, Playroom Nerves & First Timer Tips

Transcript

Speaker1: You're listening to the Wanderlust Swingers podcast with Aussie hosts Kate and Daryl. If you're curious about exploring your sexuality or the swinging, hot-wifing and non-monogamous lifestyle, you've definitely come to the right podcast. Or maybe you just love travel adventures. Either way, we share our personal, sometimes juicy, sexy stories as well as Swingers Club and event reviews, interviews with other sassy people and of course our global swinging adventures. We try to bring you a look into the Wanderlust Swingers podcast with Aussie hosts Kate and Daryl. the diverse lifestyle that the swinging and non-monogamous community has. We hope you enjoy. Now let's get into the episode. Gita guys and welcome to episode 210. Today we're going to be talking about our recent event in Texas but with a spin. I've interviewed a few of the attendees to talk about some of the sexy play they had at the event, some of the challenges they had, going to any event in the lifestyle, 12-handed massages, we've got pole lap dances, floating classes, and more. So I just want to thank everybody who joined me for this next episode. I'm going to roll straight into each of the different conversations I had with some amazing people on the lifestyle. They're going to give you advice. You can hear it from them, not me. So I'm going to get straight into the interviews. Thank you so much for listening. is based out of Atlanta and I might be going next year and I'm under strict instructions that I have to actually reach out and say hello. Welcome to the show. Thank you. Thank you so much, Kate. And yes, please come to Atlanta. Done deal. It's a direct flight. So happy days. Now you came to Texas and this is not the first time you've been to a Libertine events takeover before. How many have you been to now? Four or five? I believe that was my seventh. Holy moly. All right. So you basically should be running the joint now. I'm always I'm happy to help but I could never do what you do Kate because you're just too awesome but I just think it just speaks to how much I love your events and the people I like are at those events and they're so rudely scattered around the rest of the country for the rest of the year so yeah I have to go where they are I've actually seen you guys in Jamaica too I know you guys get a casual swing a week I've spent a bit of time with your partner and you and your dynamic and the lifestyle I know personally has adapted and changed over the years maybe can you give us a little bit of a rundown on and how you guys do the lifestyle? When we started out in the lifestyle, it was to satisfy my bi curiosity. My curiosity was satisfied and I'm bi. And then as Hubman traveled a lot more for work than I did and the children were a lot younger because we've been in this for over 15 years. He had a lot more solo adventures and then we do things together. And then in the past couple of years, I started having solo adventures because I found people I was comfortable enough with to go off and do that and I had the emotional bandwidth as the children got a little older to get involved in that because otherwise I was like no I just want to go do things at parties or do things at events because it can be a lot of work to build those friendships and connections and now we do like to do things together but if the opportunity arises we will go off I call them side quests we'll go off on little side quests I love side quests I've actually been wanting a hat for a while now. I saw it actually in Jamaica the last time we were there together. And it was one of the ladies and it says, horribly on a side quest was the hat she was wearing. And I was like, that is the best hat I think I've ever seen. And I've been on the hunt for one ever since. Playing a little bit solo every now and then, but still as a couple. How was that kind of shift in dynamic for you? Do you feel like that was an easy shift? Was it difficult? Did you feel with their jealousy? Was there compersion from the get go? So as a couple, when we first got involved, I would be concerned that, you know, he was having a good time and he would be concerned that I was having a good time. And sometimes that led to some awkward moments where we kind of not focus on who we were playing with to pay attention to each other. But we kind of worked through that. And once or twice, I've had a little jealousy come up. But at the point we started, we had been married about 15 years. And I was like, well, he's not going to run off and leave me not after all this time. And now, of course, we've married over 30 years. You know, for me, everybody kind of stays in their lane. So when he's had girlfriends in the past, you know, I was like, oh, yeah, go spend the weekend with your girlfriend. Go do this. Go do that. And then one day he took her to Home Depot. And I was like, no, that's wife shit. Home Depot's wife shit. I love that. It's like you can do all these sex things and you can have dinner and everything. And he was helping her around the house because she'd been recently divorced. because, as you know, Hubman is a very helpful man. I was like, no, that's why you can't do that. And it was all good. And he's not with that woman anymore. And actually, she and I are very good friends. We joke that I have primary custody of his ex-girlfriend. That's funny. That is hilarious. I'm trying to get her to come to one of the events, but I'm sure I'll talk her into that. And, you know, and he doesn't have any issues with my friends because at the end of the day, we just actively choose each other. you know I'm always like I'm here with you because I want to be here with you and these things that we do with other people whether they're people we've just met or they're people that we're deeply emotionally attached to it doesn't take away from what we have together. Yeah you're right about actively choosing each other I think that is something that when you are monogamous it is quite mind-boggling especially if you start this journey this this concept of you're doing that every day. And I think we forget that as we go into relationships and we become adults. I think we just, we kind of forget that. It just almost feels, oh, that person's here every day. Well, they could be somewhere else. That is an active decision. So I absolutely love what you're saying there. Shifting gears to Texas and events in general, what do you think makes a good event for you and Hubman? What is it that when you go to an event and you walk away and you go, that was great, what is that for you guys? Well, it's the people. You know, like they say, real estate's location. These events are people. And I love the mix that you have of where you have the party at night, but then you have things during the day where you can connect with people if you're not necessarily a big party person. So it's that. And I love how you have the different websites set up. You know, you have the app off of Mighty where we all get to connect before the events. which I find is really helpful because I know if we have people we know we want to be with, we'll schedule that before the event and we'll try to have some things organized. And then this last event, we just took a day for the two of us and we walked around and we went sightseeing and stuff. And then we try to leave room for something spontaneous to happen because, you know, we don't want it to be super focused. When we leave the event, we're like, did we have a good time with each other? Yes. Did we have sexy time with each other? Yes. Did we have sexy time with other people? That's a bonus, but we're always happy when it happens. And then did we meet and connect with people that maybe we'll get to know better at another event? Because the thing that people forget is the weekend goes so fast. When I'm talking to newer people, you need to go in there organized and be Like, what do you or who do you want to do Friday, Saturday? And don't be the people Sunday night. You're scrambling through the playroom trying to hook up with somebody because, oh, my God, we're out of events. Yep. Speaking of playrooms, then when you come to these events, you go to my events, you go to other events, you go to clubs and, you know, you're in other communities, of course. When you go to these events, then because playrooms are a little bit different, do you like to play in the playrooms or are you in Hubman more of a let's make those connections and maybe go and have some personal time in our room? What is your preference? Me? We are more personal time in the room. We will go to the playrooms and we will play. But I find I get a little overstimulated if there's a lot going on. And then I can't really can't really focus because when I'm when I'm fucking somebody, I like to focus on who I'm fucking and not be like, oh, what's going on over there? And what's going on over there? I kind of like to focus, but I do like the sexy vibe of the playroom. And I love how you do all the kind of different theme-y playrooms. I really love that. Where there's all the different vibes going on. And then Hubman is not really a big, oh, I'm going to fuck in front of everybody kind of person. He's a little more introverted. So we kind of work that out. But I do enjoy the, you know, probably the privacy more. And I know also I am more of a late morning, afternoon sex person. If I'm having sex after midnight, it's like a special occasion because I'm normally asleep at that point Yes, I know that I do remember us having a conversation about you kind of being more of a let's play in the afternoon and then let's go and do all the things and have drinks and dance and everything like that which I love I love a good afternoon play session Now you have, if you don't mind me talking about it undergone a little bit of a body transformation over the last few years you've been really focusing on your health and really your just well-being in general. How has that changed how you approach events these days? You know, if you're looking back on Veronica three years ago to today at events, what do you think is going differently for you, if anything at all? Well, I'm a lot more confident and I remember when I first really finished my makeover. So for people who don't know, I lost 50 pounds and then I had my boobs, done and I had a tummy tuck. I had the whole mommy makeover and I was more confident or hitting on me now and they didn't hit on me before. I'm not like, oh, well, was I not good enough? Because no, I didn't think I was good enough. So if I didn't like myself and I didn't think I was sexy, I am not going to blame you for thinking the same thing. It's hard because like sometimes I'll look in the mirror and or I'll be working out and I'll just be like, oh, my God, I look so gross. I look so fat. And then like I was doing hot yoga the other day and I caught a glimpse in one of the mirrors. I'm like, oh, that girl's hot. And then I'm like, oh, that girl's me. Wait, you know, and then also just being more comfortable with myself, you know, where I'm over 50. And as you age, you give a lot less fucks. And then as I finished menopause and my libido all came roaring back because that's really a thing. I kind of did all those things at once, but I just find that I'm a lot more self And if you're self-confident and you like yourself and you think you're sexy, other people are going to think you're sexy too. And am I everybody's cup of tea? No, but this is a visual thing and people like what they like. So if I'm not what you like, I'm not going to be mad about it. Would you have gotten up on the catwalk a couple of years ago? Would you think that played a part in you doing that? I would have done that because you had asked and I like to please people. So I might have not had a But yeah, I probably, you know, probably would have done it. And well, I'm always an open book. If you ask me questions about anything, I'm not going to lie to you. And I've, you know, talked to people about my journey with, you know, losing weight and being more attractive because, you know, at the end of the day, like some of my weight loss was spurred. I had a hip injury when I was lifting and nothing makes you feel older than a hip injury. Yep. But then also it's, well, I want to, I want to be sexy and I want to look sexy. and I want the way I feel on the inside to match how I look on the outside so you know I put the work in and then you know as you age and you have some children it's oh yeah things are not quite where I left them let's let's go pay and kind of put them back. Well I love that you did the catwalk and you know obviously everybody that does a catwalk they get to keep the laundry pieces but I what I liked was afterwards you actually took a few photos in that particular piece and you had some great shoes to match it and that was I think a bit of a keepsake you know I do like to collect things myself from my events if somebody gives me a token or something and I just I just love that I saw you in photos after that because then I'm like oh you wasn't on the catwalk but now you're you're obviously going to wear it again which just makes me feel super happy. I won't bring it to Hedo because it's latex and I will melt but you know I will absolutely bring it to another weekend and I'll probably when we do the Christmas pictures I will probably throw on a Santa hat and be like, I'm Mrs. Claus. I'm Naughty Claus. I'm Naughty Claus. I love that. Now, before I let you go, I do want you to tell the cock blocking story for the listeners because I feel like I need a shirt made, maybe a button. You know how some people like to get the buttons that say, talk to me, I'm introverted. What I need is one that says, if I'm cock blocking you, please tell me. So what happened? We had this couple that we had seen at other events. And, you know, we've been making out in the pool during the day and stuff. And we decided we were going to play. And we're like, all right, because also it was getting towards the end-ish of the evening. And it's, I also want to go back to the hotel. So it's like, all right. So I'm talking to him and just talking to her. And then you, and we're like, all right, we're going to go into the playroom. And I'm like, you know, the media room is quiet. We can go there. So we're all, the three of us are all ready to go. And the wife is just, chatting with you and chatting with you. And I'm sitting there looking at him. I'm looking at her husband and I'm like, you know, two more minutes and I'm just going to pick her ass up and carry her to the playroom. I'm like, this is why I worked out. I'm like, is she not into it? And he's no, this is her at every single event. So you were not necessarily cock blocking. You were more like the squirrel for someone's ADHD there. Yeah, the whoops, squirrel. But I did apologize and I bought you and Hubman breakfast next day to say, hey, I'm sorry about that. We appreciate that. But no, it was more like you were not cock blocking us really. And it was more like us saying, hey, you know, if you want to fuck, we got to do it. Yeah, it's time to go. Let's go. It did make me reflect, though, on the number of times because I'm obviously there on my own. Yeah. And so I'm wanting to, one, I want to talk to people. Two, I want to check in on you guys. How is the event going for you? Plus, I like a lot of you as well. So I'm wanting to have conversations because you're genuinely good and interesting people. And then I started to really reflect and I'm like, shit, how many times have I busted into a conversation where I'm like, hey guys, what's going on? Everybody want to drink? You guys want to drink? What's going on? And then I've, I thought, shit, how many times have I accidentally clock blocked or delayed, delayed some of the people at the event? I don't know, because the thing is at events, everybody wants a piece of your time. And, you know, I've done corporate events and Hubman's done corporate events. And we know, how precious your time is. So it's, oh, Kate wants to spend a few minutes with us. We're so special. We totally, you know, want to chat with you. And I think everybody feels the same way, like the same way when we're, you know, all at Hedo and Mickey and Mallory. So we're getting attention from Mickey and Mallory. Yeah. You know, it's one of those things. I'm also like, I'm a grownup, so I do have to use my words, but I'm also really polite and I don't want to be rude and break up the conversation. So it was all good. We, we had a really good time and, you know, hopefully we'll see them at another event. It's good. And I don't know if you accidentally cockblock people. You can maybe put a poll up in the Libertine. How many times has Kate cockblocked you? Have I ever accidentally cockblocked you and see what kind of response you get? Maybe just hand out tokens to people. I do have a really fabulous memory and it's not often that I get downtime of an evening and certainly downtime enough to have decent amounts of drinks with people, you know, because I'm also, I try not to get like crazy drunk because the reality is I'm up at six. But one of the great times I had personally in Texas was hanging out in the pool on Saturday night. Oh, that was fun. It was such a great energy. I really felt like people were just there to have a good time. You know, we were kind of letting loose and joking. There was a lot of jokes and we were kind of giving people shit as they were walking past on their way to their rooms and the playrooms and hoo-haring at them. But that was a really special moment for me and I actually was reflecting on that with my partner, Daryl, when I got home. And he was like, how's the event? And I said, you know, here's all these times when I actually got to spend time enjoying my event and enjoying the people around it. It was just such a great. So thank you to the both of you for being part of that. It was such a fun time. And I can tell you my side quest found getting catcalled that night, one of the event highlights for him as well. So it was so good. He greatly, greatly enjoyed that. But no, it was great getting to see you getting to enjoy your events. And, you know, anytime we can and help you with that so you can enjoy your event. You just tell us. Will do. It's been great talking to you, Veronica, and thank you so much for coming to the events. And I won't get to see you now until like March next year, but I will get to see you in Jamaica. So that is not something we can be sad about. Thank you for joining me on the podcast. No, thank you for having me, Kate. I appreciate it. You have a good day. And welcome back, everybody. I now have Sherry and Jay from Texas joining us. Welcome to the show. Thank you. Thanks for having us. Maybe tell us a little bit about yourselves. How long have you been in the lifestyle for? We're empty nesters. We raised our kids and then someone decided our life needed to be spicier. So about, I don't know, June of last year, 2024, we kind of just made the decision that this is something we were going to do. We found out that we had been lifestyle adjacent for probably 10 or 15 years. And we wondered where all these fun people would be. And then we figured out where they were and went, oh, there they are. The people that talk back. Now, when you mean lifestyle adjacent, are you talking maybe like you were trying new things in the bedroom or sex toys or role play? What made you feel lifestyle adjacent? I think it was like we did a bunch of rallies. Well, yes, we rode motorcycles for a bunch of years and you end up at motorcycle rallies. And that's kind of like NASCAR meets New Orleans for Mardi Gras. It was okay to be topless. So I embraced that early on and just kind of felt comfortable with that, I think. Wow. Okay. We had a bunch of, you know, fun lake trips where Somehow people are topless on a boat or naked neighbor in a hot tub or something like that. But never anything sexual with anybody. Just had fun. Just freeing. Well, yeah. And where are these fun people? And then about two years ago, we went to Temptation for a couple of days. But Sherry wanted to check that place out. And we hung out with people in the lifestyle and they couldn't believe that we weren't. And then we realized that they were fun. I have a great question actually for you, Sherry. Then when you were going topless, then when you joined the lifestyle, Do you think that kind of gave you almost a leg up in terms of body positivity? Did that make it easier for you to dress a little bit more provocatively or even go naked at events? Yes. I think because Jay encouraged that from me early on when we were young in our marriage, all the way through the marriage, he was like, you just, you have such a beautiful body. If you're comfortable, embrace it. You know, there's no reason to be shy or anything like that. So I kind of, in my 30s, after having kids, I kind of took over my body and said, okay, you're different now, but you're still beautiful. I like it and he enjoys it. So I just did. And then when the kids moved out of the house, he gave me a ultimatum that no tan lines. It was a task. It was a task. Yes, it was a task. So that was two years ago was to get no tan lines. And clearly by my photos, I have no tan lines. and I'm going to keep up with that as long as I can. So many people do struggle. I think that's one of the biggest hurdles is, oh shit, now I've got to, I've got to dress provocatively and I've got to be naked in front of people. You know, that's a big step for a lot of people. And so the fact that you were already kind of halfway there, you know, like Jay, you know, you were saying like, oh, you know, he was encouraging you and he's just shrugging his shoulders and smirk and he's, who would it be? I don't, what's the question? Why are we talking about this? I can't imagine why. Now I got a question for you, the two of you then, having now been to Temptation and been to, and things of that nature. What do you think most couples fail at when they're attending their first hotel takeover? I think back, we went to a floor takeover for a hotel. It was totally not like your event at all, just a party. We had no idea what to expect. We had only been in the lifestyle, I don't know, like four months or so, and we hadn't seen any of these types of things. So I think that just watching people and then some of the interactive stuff that were at your seminars, the introverted people, just they don't know how to talk to people socially anyway. And so I think like Most people are afraid that someone's going to drag you into a room and tie you to a bed and make you participate in an orgy with people you don't know. That doesn't happen. I think a lot of people would struggle with having a fear of uncertainty and doubt and the unknown. And then if you're an introverted person, then you're not going to step out of your comfort zone and say, hey, we're Jay and Sherry. Yeah. On that then, if a couple is introverted, what advice would you give them to make sure that they're meeting other couples, making the most of the event? I think just deciding like whatever steps and boundaries a couple would have. Like we did one of the, one of the podcasters had a seminar on flirting and it was a brand new introverted couple in our group. And the host had suggested saying, Hey, we're going to be over here in the playroom. Why don't you join us? And they faces turned white. They were scared to death. And I looked at them and I'm like, we don't actually do that. We just encouraged them to say introductory things like, you know, we're Jay and Sherry. We're from Texas. Where are you guys from? Have you ever been to a Libertine event before? Just the basics. I have something to say on before you attend an event or any play session. The communication of all the scenarios and what are you okay with? What are you not okay with? What are you ready for? What do you think you're ready for? Do you want me to encourage you if you're scared? Because sometimes I will get more nervous and anxious and Jay will be like, wait, we talked about this. Are you not comfortable anymore? And if I say, yeah, I need you to lead this. that helps take that nervousness away and say, okay, I know we want to do this. So you be in charge or whatever, you know, just the anxiety of, I think I'm ready and I'm curious and communicating that up front that it's okay to kind of push that boundary in a safe space. Yeah. Being, being a wing person. Right. We've always met people easily. So it's like that, that's not a struggle for us. It's more for us. It's just how, like what Sherry was talking about being the communication of, you know, is, is she interested in, seeing where this might go or is she afraid of seeing where this might go and then I'm less fear-based in that category where it's we're not saying yes to anything specifically we're just saying yes to opening the door yeah taking a step forward do we want to step into this room or not and not you don't have to do anything in that room but do we want to go in there it might be sexy speaking of rooms did you guys have a chance to use the playrooms on site so we did so I'm I'm not a lifestyle club playroom fan I don't I don't know it's not something I have got Yeah, I've not gotten excited about that. She's made me, and I have. But it's not my favorite way to enjoy the lifestyle, if you would. By going into each of the playrooms, we were kind of pushing some boundaries for ourselves. And we went into each one of them. And, you know, even if it wasn't our scene, we tried to hang out for a few minutes and kind of see, does it change our minds or something? We found ourselves in the massage room. Oh, yeah. So, yeah. Well, one is our room was directly across the wall from it. So you just kind of step out of our room and go, oh, look, there's... There's that room. But we ended up having a good time in there both of the nights. We did. Yeah. I think they were all very well thought out. Everyone was different from each other. And it was neat to see couples move from different areas and scenes. So it was neat. Yeah, that's always interesting to me. Which one's going to be the most interesting or most heavily used? I forget which night. It had to have been the second night. I think one of the ladies counted. And I think 22 or 23 people total in the room. Oh, wow. Wow. Yeah. That is impressive. Yeah. It was busy. I had a 12 hand massage. Oh, wow. How was that for you? Were you doing sensory deprivation at the time? Or were you looking or? You just had her eyes closed. I just had my eyes closed. Jane, I've done a little bit of that before. Our first hotel takeover, we went into a room and there was a lady on the table. Her husband was behind her. Oh, okay. And one of our female friends grabbed me and said, come with me, come with me. There's this sexy female on the table and she only wants women. And I went, okay. So we went in there and her husband had the whipped cream shots. Yeah, the alcohol. Yeah. The adult whipped cream. And so he kind of picked who he was going to allow to her take and his wife, per se. She was tied up and blindfolded. Yes. Face up on a massage table. Yes. It's an open room with people waiting for whatever. Yeah. So that was our first sexy experience to go through that and kind of be part of that. She had no idea who it was. And then when she finally got off the table and unmasked herself, she looked around the room and she was like, you and you and you. It was so cute. So that's when I kind of was like, I want that. I would love that. So I got to have your last event. There we go. That is amazing. It's 12 hands. Wow. That is. Minus the whipped cream. Yeah, no whipped cream. Minus the whipped cream. No pH imbalances here. That's what I always say. Did you two have any surprising moments of your time at the event? I think you had a bus dance that was kind of hilarious. Yeah, there was a lady that took particular interest in flirting with me all weekend long. And on the bus ride over, it ended up being standing room only. Being raised in the south, if I'm I'm sitting in a lady standing and I'm not going to be sitting so I offered my seat next to Sherry away and I ended up standing and where I was standing was where the stairs were getting on the bus so there was room there and this lady made her way from the front of the bus to the back of the bus given I guess birthday lap dances to several people back there and I was kind of in the middle and so then for the remaining balance of the bus ride I got a very lengthy pole dance. Oh yeah. It was entertaining. Very much so. Yes. You made everybody laugh. It wasn't me. It's red cheeks made everybody laugh. That's awesome though. It's always funny with those because I never get to ride the party buses. It's so rare because I'm trying to get there first, make sure everything's going okay. So we have these party buses and I hear these crazy stories and I'm like, damn it. I never get to ride on them and kind of be part of it. What about fun stories? Anything fun that you want to share with people that happened at the event? It happened exactly like I'm going to tell it and it was not on purpose. So we did the classes on flirting and we were in a little group of six. And they gave us a scenario to practice flirting. And it was, if you were to accidentally bump into somebody, how do you turn around and make something sexy? We were joking about that. And then either that night or the next night, Sherry was wearing a dress and it touched the ground. And so we're just walking through the dance floor. And this lady happened to step exactly on the bottom corner of her dress. And so Sherry does that, you know, like that whole rubber band whoops. And so I just turned around and I just kind of slid my arm at the, the waist of this lady, like a side hug. And I said, Hey, can I get you to lift your left foot for me? And her and her husband are looking at me like, are you trying to see my shoes? What is happening here? And I said, well, actually you're just standing on her dress. And so then we move and we laugh. And so then I said, well, we just came out of this flirting class where they were talking about if you bumped into somebody, how do you turn into something sexy? And so they thought we were playing a game and it's no, but you really are standing on her dress. And then we covered that. And then Sherry just turns her shoulders square to them and goes, Hey, so where are you guys from? And each time we were just laughing and laughing and laughing. So we ran into them at the pool the next day. It was cute. It was like, oh, it's this easy. Hi, how are you? We're from Texas. This actually happens. But I'm going to put you on the hot seat. At this event or any other event, have you ever come across a couple where one of you really want to play with them and the other person is not interested or is kind of vetoed the play? Has that happened to you guys yet? Yep. How did you handle it? A lot of communication. Yeah, a lot of communication. So we had a situation where Sherry and the other lady were kissing and kind of warming things up. And, and the guy, he was talking about things that weren't sexy and he just didn't understand the shut up. And so my, my mind got pulled into opposite of sexy and the girls got up thinking, okay, we're either going back to girls room or back to our room. And they're all happy and excited. They were totally into it. They were all ready to go. And we stood up and I just looked at Sherry and I said, we're done for the night. And she just goes, Oh, Okay. And we went back to our room and she went, what happened? And I was like, oh, well, the conversation wasn't sexy. And it was just one of those things. It was like, it was late. That's a long way back. I had never been caught blocked from another man before. And that happened. He did it. It was fun. Oh my gosh. On the best night of the year. You said Texas is a very proud state. It's also a very argumentative state, competitive state when it comes to Texas barbecue. And so I always tell people that are coming into my Texas in particular, please don't talk about Texas barbecue in the playrooms. Don't get into this. Austin has it better. No, Dallas has it better. Houston is clearly the winner. I'm like, cause you all get into that. And then meanwhile, somebody's on the swing. Guys, stop talking about Texas barbecue. Get out of here. Yeah. Oh my God. Hilarious. So we, we had another, I guess it was a potential. It was at the club Sunday, but we had had from the, the lady that was extra flirty, we had had kind of a very sexy offer. Very sexy. And, and Sherry was excited. and I wasn't excited and I wasn't. So I was the wet blanket and she was kind of pouty about it. But I just wasn't, I wasn't interested in the playroom. So. Yeah. It happens. No. Yeah. It is always one of those things. I think that I don't quite know whether everybody's always on the same level with another couple or a match. Years ago, we spoke about taking one for the team and whether or not you truly do ever find a four way connection. And Daryl and I kind of argued backwards and forwards about this. And I think it's very hard to find somebody where the two people are getting on. The other two people are equally as interested. That is a very, very difficult thing. I think what you'll find is someone's like 100%, someone can be 80%. That's just kind of how things shape up. As we get ready to wrap up here, you've been to Temptation. You mentioned before you went to a floor takeover. You spent the weekend with us in San Antonio. Do you have any advice from people that are looking for events and how they can find one that matches their personality? Ooh, that's a good question. Thank you. We Got a Thing community would talk about how much they liked your events and how well organized they were. And then in contrast, at some of the other podcasts, like when they talk about their events, they're maybe focused heavily on drug use, drug management, and what kind of drugs to have and how to be partying with them. And for us, that's not exactly what we're looking for. We understand people are going to do some things, but as long as it's different, that's fine. As opposed to the whole theme is all the drugs are here and let's do all the things and get wild. So I think for someone looking for an event is, listen, like to your podcast and listen to what your events are about. How do you view the lifestyle? And then how does someone else view it? And what is that event about? The hotel manager at San Antonio, we were talking to him and he said that your group was the best group because there were several other groups that were there. And I asked different how, and he said, well, some of them are just partying, like hard partying. And it's like, oh, okay. Well, and you did that a lot better in our opinion. The summary of that would be our advice would be to just listen to how is your event and then if you have no idea what you want well then you got to go find out. You got to experience them you know. Yeah it is tough you don't know until you kind of some of the times and you know I got asked this the other day what they're asking about Scottsdale in particular and they said we've never been to an event before would this be a good event for us and I said well tell me about yourself. I don't know you from Adam I need to understand because to your point Jay if you are very much someone who's I want MDMA I want ketamine I want Instagram models. that's what I want. Well, I'm going to say our event's not for you, you know, and it definitely goes somewhere else. So, yeah, but it is tough until you kind of get out there and explore it. And it would have been super easy for me to be like, hell yeah, come to our event. But I'd rather you not because, you know, you're not going to really be able to mingle very well with other people. And I think like in following up to that, your event, if I think about it from someone who's never been to anything at all, say someone that's brand new in the lifestyle, and this is the first thing they're going to experience, the fact that you have seminars from a variety of people. Love it. We didn't go to all of them just because we didn't want to sit in there and we didn't want to be in class. We wanted to be in the pool, but we wanted to learn. Yeah, we felt like had we had that experience, like in the very beginning of our lifestyle journey, that would have been very, very good information to have been exposed to a group full of people ask questions. And because like in our little breakout sessions, sometimes we were the more experienced people. Sometimes we were, we were extroverted. Someone else was introverted. Then it worked because you got to see what's everybody afraid of. And then what's the information. There's nothing to be afraid of because you get to to choose what it is that you want to do. Absolutely. Yeah, you're in charge. Yeah. Oh, I love that. Well, guys, that's the end of your segment. So I just want to say thank you again for joining me on the podcast. But more importantly, thank you for joining me and trusting the other reviews. They are all paid people, by the way, the people that were telling you to come. Yeah, we pay them all. So thank you very much for coming and joining us in San Antonio. I really appreciate it. Well, thanks for having us. Look forward to the next time. Yeah, absolutely. Thanks, Kate. Bye, Kate. Now I have Jennifer joining me. Jennifer has a partner also, Don. Don can't join us today, but we do have the lovely Jennifer here. So thank you very much for joining me. It's great to have you on the show. Yeah, I am super excited to chat with you, Kate. I am like loving the idea of reliving San Antonio again. Well, I'm so happy that the both of you came down. I know we were emailing a little bit beforehand and talking about what to expect at the event. And I got to see the both of you really come out of your shells, the entire event and kind of culminating in the final night. But I don't want to get too ahead of myself here. So perhaps just for the listeners, for yourself and Don, can you maybe give us an indication? What is your dynamic? Yeah, so we've actually been together for 10 plus years in the lifestyle for maybe a year, maybe even more than that. But we didn't know it was called lifestyle. And even your San Antonio event just happened to be the perfect time and perfect place. We just jumped basically. So you're right. There was a there's a lot going on in that event. So would you actually classify yourself as swingers? I feel like it changes on our mood. Perfect. To be honest, it depends on the group of people. Sometimes it's just about connection. That's really it. And if it goes anywhere, sure. If it doesn't, that's okay too. It depends is my answer. I love that actually because I think fluidity is something that you're right my mood changes you know sometimes I like to be a hot wife sometimes we're into different dynamics sometimes we play as a couple sometimes I'm you know more dominant more submissive I think that having the ability to kind of talk to your partner and yourself and really decide what you want to do is a great way to go about approaching the lifestyle because then it kind of almost ensures that you're going to have a good time because you're not forcing kind of square peg round hole in so many words right Yeah, in so many words, exactly. When you were coming into the event, what was something that you were seriously stressed about? Maybe if you know something for Don as well, we'd love, I know he's not here, but we'd love to hear what maybe, maybe you can tell on him what he was getting stressed about. You are going to laugh at this because as we were leading up to the event, we were thinking, can we please have a schedule? Because this feels like a conference. I feel like I need a time by time. There's a little Like, please let them give us a booklet whenever we actually check in. That was what we were worried about. Because on the website, you see everything a little differently. And I guess we're old school and we like things on paper. It was just so many things to do. And we wanted to do everything, but we realized we couldn't. And we were feeling FOMO, not even being there yet. So yeah, that's where we were at. It's actually funny you say that because one of the lives I do for the attendees before the event and something I always say is you cannot physically do everything. It's just not possible so don't stress about it and allow yourself some downtime but there's always the couples and you know I'm this type of personality too that are like no I want to like there's all these things happening and I want to see and I want to do them and then you end up burning yourself out and you know it's a disaster by the end of the weekend. Oh my gosh. Yes. We were like, we're going nonstop. We need to take naps. Oh, wait, I don't normally take naps, but I have to take a nap just to have energy to go to the party at the end or just to talk to people because talking to people in itself can be tiring. So there's all these little things that you wouldn't normally consider or do in your daily life. But for this three, four full day event, you had to pace yourself with like even your food and your water and your electrolytes and everything. You're not wrong It's one of the most simplistic things I mean we're adults we've been keeping ourselves alive for decades and yet we get to these amazing circumstances and I swear that part of our brain just it just goes away because we're having such a great time but unless you replenish your stock and your energy bar you're you're fucked like you're not gonna make it the weekend you're like you said talking to people is exhausting you know especially if being an extrovert doesn't come supernaturally to you Yeah yeah I think it wasn't until maybe the second day. And there was only like three, four day event that I thought, I need a nap. And I never take naps. I hate naps. I really do. But it was very useful. How did you go in the end that we published the schedule on our app? We normally have a printed brochure. And this time I was attempting to be a little bit more environmentally friendly. But like you, there are some people who want a physical brochure and they want to be able to tick things and highlight things. Did that work for you? Or were you still walking away like, God damn it, I wish I had a brochure? That's so hard, Kate, because I want to be environmentally friendly too, but I really want them for sure because I'm totally that way. Like I color code everything. I mark yes, no, maybe so. And then here's another thing. And I guess the website is still there, but it's kind of like a keepsake. Granted, you gave the coolest keepsakes. We still have the don't be a thundercut little. And I seriously, I was like, I want more of these little buttons, little things like that. Even the little purple penis. All of these little things we have kept and every time you look at them it reminds us of it so I feel like I would have been that kind of person who kept even the little brochure to remind me what all we did and you know why it was fun and what we learned. That's really interesting I actually keep all the bracelets so I have all of the bracelets for all of our events now and that's something that I personally keep as my keepsake and when I'm kind of going back through all my event stuff I find them every now and then I'm like oh look There's the one from Dallas in 2011 and stuff like that. So I get it. I love that. What firsts did you have at this event? I'm assuming there was quite a few. We had some first experiences where I really feel, and there's no pun intended here, okay? Like we really got lucky. We got lucky with the people we met because everyone was just so nice and just so real and they were all from different states and countries and even that gives you a whole new perspective i feel like that was one of the biggest things we got in bed with a couple couple of others which we had no idea how that would be and that was like oh my gosh so fucking sexy i could not even i couldn't have guessed i really couldn't is it called an orgy i don't know at this point whether it is or not that was a first and that was just hot so hot and then oh your fashion show. My goodness, I don't think I've ever seen my husband be so open. That was so amazing to see as a spouse. Him just literally blooming, wearing, I don't know what he was wearing. It wasn't a thong. No, a little teeny tiny thing. Yeah, piece of manjaree, we call it. I was actually hoping that you would bring that up mainly because I wanted to talk about it. I was so excited that the two of you joined that. You know, when I I said, hey, would this be something that you're interested in? And you were like, oh yeah, I think so. And then when Don turned up and it was going to be the both of you, I was like, this is fantastic. I love it when women come out of their shell and that's great and it's amazing and beautiful to see. But men don't get enough ability, I think, to showcase themselves and they don't get all these beautiful, confident and amazing words that we give each other as women. And so to see Don actually get up there and do his thing, even from my perspective, I was like, this is your first time here. you're getting in the deep end. And I honestly, I love it. And thank you so much for joining that little kind of fun part of our event. No, and I have to tell you, there was one host in particular, John was wearing his outfit. And they come in and he's kind of a little shy. And this is after the runway show. She immediately came up to him and was like, why are you shy? You are in amazing shape. You are just amazing as a person. Like, don't cower. Be proud of who you are. And he just opened up something that he never knew about himself. He's like, you know, you're right. Why am I stressing about this? Who cares? If my wife is fine with it, if people I care about is fine with it, it's totally fine. So yeah, it was so amazing to see that side of him. Yeah. And getting that, like I said, getting those words of affirmation from other people as a man, I think is so, so important and something we as a community, I think need to do more of, you know, we, we don't give enough flowers to guys oftentimes. So I'm glad that that happened and I'm glad he felt. What was a surprising moment? I'm assuming, you know, we've spoken about the orgy, the catwalk. Was there anything that really took you by surprise over the event? So I feel like it's a little cheesy. There's a little session and it was all about your connection. Because usually you're in the lifestyle with another person, right? And it's purely based off of your connection. And, you know, for us, it really is exploring different sides of ourselves. But also with each other, with a safe space, with different people. And so that specific seminar, we literally stared into each other's eyes for five minutes. It was initially super duper awkward. But it worked. We were crying like midway in and we were trying to just own it. But I feel like we came out of that so much stronger. And it was such a simple thing. It made all the difference. And it made us kind of like, a relief or a reminder of why we're in the lifestyle. You know, we're not in it for others. We're in it with each other and to just learn about ourselves. So that was really surprising for us. Yeah, I know that. That was the flirty swingers with the love buzz. I think that's the session you're referring to. And they're fabulous people. They're super upbeat, really welcoming. And they're the kind of personalities that way they kind of do really get that more intellectual side of it, a more emotional side of it. and I really appreciated that. I had great feedback from the people that were in the session with you for the exact same reason. People walked out going, this is amazing. I'm so much more connected to my partner and now I'm ready to explore that with other people, which is absolutely fabulous. Did you go into the session perhaps with the electric play? Oh my goodness. So that was an eye-opening experience too in that what the hell is this thing? How does this work? What are you doing? Are you really going to electrocute me? Is there really a a method of how to do this exactly. And then, you know, after that session, fast forward, they were in the playrooms in the evening. And so for the events, I actually had added tinsel to my hair, right? And so one of the people that we met, and they're like, Oh, I want to do the electric play. I want to be there. And she's and so she asked me, Can you please graze me with your hair? Oh, wow. What? What? Why would you She's like, but tinsel, tinsel with electric play, you know, just, just try it. And oh my God, it was the weirdest feeling. I pulled my hair to the side, had it like in a ponytail. And I just grazed my hair up and down her back. And you could feel the electrical shooting. And for me, I was just the one like doing the very light movement, but I could feel it all over. And at a point it just got a little too much. And I'm like, I can't, I really can't. But she's like, this is the most saddest That's so crazy. And it's so funny because when you put those little tinsel pieces in your hair, you're just kind of like, oh, this is a really beautiful aesthetic. It's going to be fun. It's going to be playful. Maybe in the dance area, the lights might bounce off it. You know, you're not really thinking, oh, and then when I go in the electrical play session, like I'm going to be able to essentially, you know, graze my hair on somebody. That is so interesting and something that you just would not even think about when you got those done. Well, and the people that were actually hosting, right, the electric play, they were telling me that they would randomly just buy things that they would think would work really well with the electric play and test it out. So if anything, I gave them another thing that they can try because you can buy, like the tinsel stuff, crazy, crazy cheap. And when you buy it, you could probably put it in like a pom-pom and use it as a little, like a flogger of sorts, right? Yeah. Jason and Sarah, they're big fans of, you know, found material play. big fans of it. He'll go into a hardware store and he'll come out with some crazy stuff and then figure out how that can be used. And, you know, they're really into that kind of sensual but found object play as well. So yeah, there's no doubt in my mind he's probably already purchased some tinsel and is probably advocating for people to start wearing tinsel in their hair at other events. That would not surprise me in the slightest at all. Now, as we get ready to wrap up, not everything is going to be rainbows, lollipops and unicorns. Was there anything in the event that you struggled with or maybe some advice you would give to other people coming to an event for the first time. You know, a part of me was thinking I wouldn't have made the connections I did beforehand through the site. I don't know how our experience would have been. So I would honestly say being out there is really key because it's like if you're an introvert and going into the lifestyle and you're not putting yourself out there, I don't know how how well it's going to be for you. Right. Like because most people are there for specific reasons and they're going to go for it. Right. We actually met one couple that we actually live in town with. And they said they went the first day and they were so overwhelmed that they left. And I was absolutely shocked about that because I thought, I'm not paying all this damn money to leave. Are you fucking kidding me? I need to figure this out. I'm gonna try my best to do this. So I definitely, as far as advice suggests to you, really giving it your all, at least even in the beginning of it. I feel like those interactions definitely helped in the beginning, even after the event was super is still now like the connections there are there they're not going anywhere you need to foster these like a friendship whether lifestyle or not is a two-way street so you have to communicate and that is really really key i will say one thing that i'm kind of a little bumble but not totally is we didn't go out to the pool okay yep we went out once and i felt like one it was a little smaller right I wasn't super contained, but I also was intimidated by everyone there because they were wearing the most just nuts. And skimpy is not bad per se, but I was intimidated too. Like, look, I may look on the outside perfectly comfortable, but I'm not. No. And you know what? A lot of people I'm guessing are like that too, but you just get over it and eventually you do you. So. I agree. Relationships take energy, regardless of the type of relationship. It could be a work relationship. You know, your primary relationships take energy. But you're right. I think that going into that environment where, as somebody new, the pool party, for example, and you're right, it is quite a contained pool at the San Antonio property. Miami is significantly more open just by the way the resort's laid out. Thinking back 10 years ago when we joined the Lifestyle, for a first-time person to perhaps walk in at, I don't know, 3 in the afternoon when the music's going and everybody's kind of dancing and everyone's talking and it's pretty full, I can imagine most people coming in would be like, what the fuck have I walked into? And how do I even start by walking through those gates? You know, it would be very easy to kind of stand or it would have been for me to stand on that peripheral and maybe have a drink or watch or not go in. So I absolutely get it. And it's a good reminder that these new things that maybe I take for granted 10 years down the track are still there for some people. And having some of that nervous new energy, I think is really important for me to remember as well. Well, let me tell you something I just remembered. There was the other session about how to flirt. Oh, yeah. I expansive connection. And my goodness, that made so much of a difference too. Because we had the session. And then something happened where I thought, holy shit, they were flirting and I didn't get it. It totally like went over my head. I'm learning something and then finally putting it to practice. So I do want to say expansive connection about that too, because it's like, like there's so many obvious things but it's not until you outright spill it that it finally makes sense so even that simple but something that i think was really helpful for us down the line or now well i'm i'm so glad that you guys came so jennifer and don thank you so much for joining us thank you for putting yourselves out there thank you for joining the catwalk and thank you for being so positive about all the seminars that you sat in for the hosts that host them it's so important to have energy and interested people in the crowd watching them rather than just feeling like they're speaking at people. So thank you very much for your positive engagement with all the sessions you sat in as well. We really appreciate you. Thanks, Kate. You definitely, you have us hooked. We need to figure out how to get to your other events and we need to figure out very soon. Oh, thank you so much. And we'll chat to you soon and hopefully see you soon then. That's good. What looks to be Florida, but I know that they're based in Atlanta. Thank you very much for joining us on the show. Oh, thank you for having us. Thank you for having us. Palm trees kind of spells Florida. You know, back home for me, it spells Queensland, but they're in the States. Palm trees equals Florida. That's it. There is no other palm trees anywhere else in the entire United States. As I'm concerned, the same thing. Yeah, they're nowhere else. This is our future home, I hope, and our little piece of paradise. So we know you're from Atlanta, but how long have you guys been fucking other people for? What's the story between the two of you. About two and a half years. Yeah, yeah. And it just all started sitting at the fire pit in the backyard. And I'm so shortening this, but I basically like that. I'm like, I like girls. And your reply was? I know. Here we are. He's like, I've been with you for a while now. Like, I know, I get it. I got that vibe. Yeah. We jumped in and started with just some of the apps, dated some folks, you know, couples dates and things like that. And we just kept going. And how do you guys classify your dynamic? Would you call yourself a swinger or what is your dynamic? Yes. Yeah. I would say classify as swingers for sure. Yeah. And, you know, from a couple's dynamic, you know, same room, we full swap all those things. Our boundaries are soft and somewhat as they do over time. That's been really interesting too, how boundaries change. Yeah. Very much so. Yeah, they do. And we get a little more, more and more adventurous. And I think, you know, some of the early, not the diabetes, into the envy, jealousy topics, but that stuff resolves. It doesn't go away, but you have different ways to handle it. You learn from it. We learn from it. I think because we jumped in so fast, and I mean fast, we're like, okay, another date. Let's go on another date. Let's go on another date. We were able to work through a lot of things that I think a lot of new folks go through. Yeah, you're not wrong. It's not necessarily that those things completely disappear. What happens is you educate yourself on the tools and how to deal with them just based through experience. Now, listen, San Antonio, this was your first Libertine Events takeover, but you're seasoned in the lifestyle. You go to clubs, you go to other events, you go to other takeovers, you go to resorts. I know that about you. But are you nervous going to new events anymore? What happens there? You know, we're not nervous going. We're anxious and excited. One of the things we didn't talk about in the introduction is we also run a group in Atlanta and we have events with a group of Pineapples After Dark. And what I think is the nervous energy about it is we sometimes don't know how to behave. at events we're not throwing or takeovers that we're not we don't know how to relax we don't know how to relax yep so and we want to help like we're helpers we just we're gonna go in and do stuff and that's sort of how we got into what we do anyway and so i would say let's say what do we do now what do i do with my hands i don't know what they do with my hands that they're saying i don't know what they do with my hands yeah like what's next kind of thing not a nervousness it's more of like an excited anxious what to expect because all events are different and once we get comfortable and relaxed then we we actually can enjoy for sure and we'll make friends fast like we want to make sure we're there for a reason i'm not going to spend two days being shot so i'm going to jump in and learn who people are quick because we only have a few precious days yeah i do get a little bit envious i have to say because i'm i feel like a bit old hat and it's actually something daryl and i are going to talk about soon we've been in the lifestyle now for over 10 years and i see these new people especially coming to these events or having these kind of first experiences and i'm i'm envious because i don't get that gut what's going to happen now Whereas in the first couple of years, I used to, you know, we would be getting ready and I'd be listening to music. I'm like, oh my God, what if I see a big dick? Now I'm like, okay. You mentioned that you don't know what to do with your hands. And you also mentioned that, you know, you want to kind of get stuck in and start to meet people straight away because you know why you're there. So I have a question for you. Recently, you mentioned that you forget to do, and I quote, swing a shit. So you mentioned that you go to your local club and you forget to do swing a shit. So I'm curious, did you do Swinger Shit at San Antonio. And what advice would you give to others who also want to do Swinger Shit? You know, the forget to do Swinger Shit is I think because we're at our home club and we know so many people, we do a lot of glad handing the whole time. A lot of times they go off and do Swinger Shit and we're just tired. So we want San Antonio. Yes, we did. High five. We're so excited about it. We met a brand new couple. Ashley and Russ came with us or we came with them. I don't know how you want to put it. We travel so much with them. We don't do a lot of Swinger Shit with them. And So we all said we want to go meet new people. So we're so excited that we're able to relax, let our hair down. Yeah. Met a great couple hung out, but for a day and a half before. Yeah. We finally got to do swing shit, swinging shit. Super great couple. We've seen them once since then as well. Got to hang out for a little bit. So yeah. At another takeover. Yeah. And they weren't even supposed to be there. That was funny. Anyway. Yeah. So that was, that was good. Awesome. And do you have any advice for other people that maybe forget to do swing a shit? I say, just relax and enjoy and be yourself. If it's going to happen, it's going to happen. Don't put pressure on yourself. Don't put pressure on yourself. And obviously don't put pressure on others. We're kind of shy. Not really, but shy when it comes to actually pulling the trigger. Oh, yes. Lindsay's like, what? I'm like, we're shy? What? If Lindsay's ready, she's like, yeah, okay, we're going to take this next step. She'll usually say something like, I'm taking my husband back to the bedroom. We're going to fuck. So you can come with us if you like. It's like my transition. And I'm like, all right, I'm really ready to go play. You're welcome to join us, but no pressure. That's kind of a thing. I mean, it's good advice, putting it out there, but not putting pressure on the other people to join in. Absolutely perfect. What was a highlight memory for you both at the event? I would say riding scooter at night. I had a brand new nickname at that event. I did. Yeah. I'm getting shirts made and everything with chip. Yes. And if you do want to hear the story behind the scooter incident of 2025, head over to Ross and Ash's podcast. Hot Couple Chronicles and you'll hear why Lindsay is referring to herself as Chip. Exactly. Check that out. Highlights related specifically to the event. Going to Colette was a real highlight for me. Oh, that was a treat. Just going there. It was our club. It was wonderful to go visit another club. Meaning it was a buyout. It was a buyout. And it was so much, we had so much fun. It's a great club. And it was for me because we've got our home club and that's where we always go. It was so nice. to see something different. I really like the vibe there. So thank you for that. That was a great treat to get to go there and experience that. Yeah, it's not something we usually do, actually. We don't go off-site often at a hotel takeovers for a few reasons. You know, we've got the hotel. Why would we do that? But to the other side of it, logistically, party buses taking over a club like it becomes a nightmare. So that was a bit of a difference and a bit of a treat that we just don't normally do. So I love that. Now, I did have a question, which was what was something sexy that happened? And you mentioned there that you had played with another couple. So what else sexy happened with the two of you at the event? Oh, for me, getting to do the lingerie fashion show. I put that lingerie on. I mean, I loved what I wore there, but somehow picked out the perfect one and put it on. And I'm like, I am a badass bitch right now. And I just shredded my stuff out through there. And that was a sexy moment for me, just personally. And then seeing everybody else and just, oh, it gives me chills. I loved it. I don't know if I felt for me it was sexy, but I felt that I was encouraged to do it. And I was like, yeah, I'm going to go do this. Right. That was something I'm not usually comfortable in my own skin about. So we had another sexy thing. And that was the, your entertainers, especially the night with the fire. That was fantastic. That was just. Wow. That was. It was so hot, literally and figuratively, yeah. I just sat amazed watching that. It was very funny because they were obviously trying to get everybody to back up. And he was working around. He's like, no, no, I need you guys to back up. And in the way that crowds do and certainly lifestyle people do, they were like, yeah, yeah, cool. And he was like, no, no, seriously. And they're like, yeah, yeah. And then still dancing. And then he lit a fire and they went, oh, shit. And then when he did the Sparks show as well, they were like, oh. And he's like, that's why I was trying to get you guys to. I probably had a sexy moment out on the dance floor. There was another woman there and her partner, and there was sexy dancing and kissing, and it was very in the groove. That was really nice to watch. I just stood back and watched the two of them, and I'm like, oh. You were being a bit of a pervert, because I'm a big fan of perverts. I love them. Now, you guys had a slight open-door policy. And we'll get it from your perspective in a second why you do that. But what I wanted to share actually, something that you guys don't know, is that we went to an event, attended one in 2016, and we were in New Orleans. And we met these people in the line to get into the event. And they had a very similar kind of open door policy. We were actually down the hall from each other. So I think they were maybe five doors down or eight doors down from me. And throughout the course of the weekend, he would come or she would come and they would just knock or barge into our room. We would do the same thing. We would get up in the morning, go knock on their door. That was in 2016. And they're based out of Texas. And they are some of our best friends in the entire world. So open door policy works. It is absolutely great to form friendships. But you had this room that was quite visible. Why did you do what you did and what worked and maybe what didn't work so much for it? We like to decorate our room. We also are fastidious about keeping our room neat. Because how we host events, we've always kept the door open because people come and go, we have drinks, and everybody wants to come say hi. So it just is natural for us to do that. But what we found is we meet so many people. And the amount of time that we spent with you, you know, that was fantastic. All the other folks that filtered that came and went, you know, we got to say hi. Well, I love they'll come in, you talk for a few minutes, they might have a shot or a drink or something. And that few minutes, you then see them later on the dance floor. And you've already had that icebreaker moment. So it's like you go up and, You get to dance and vibe and hang out. It's cliche. It's just a great way to meet people and a great icebreaker for us. Unless we're getting ready or you want to take a nap or something. Pretty much. The door is usually open. And now I have a doorstop that goes everywhere with me. You know how many compliments we get on that doorstop? Yes, everybody loved our doorstop. I'm getting branded doorstops you can sell them. They're invaluable, the amount, because I only buy them in packs of like 20 as well. They're invaluable. You know, we need them for our room crawls when we do the room crawls. So it's just, I think I've got probably 10 in my spare room right now yeah so you said room crawls the other thing is we we also usually host a room crawl room yeah we go to secrets down in florida simi quite a bit and every time we're there with eye candy we're hosting one of the rooms for for room pro it's just a natural fit we enjoy it now if you were to come to another libertine events what would you do differently we walked away from the san antonio event going this this is the type of event that we only ever want to go to and And it is, for us, it was next level. It's the thing we've been dreaming about to have and do or go to. It's so thoughtful of everything. I was thinking about this, like, for the sake of ease, like, a daily schedule that's in the elevator for people. I don't know. Like, I'm rolling stuff out of my head. Because, I mean, everything from Arrival, the venue, the staff, those amazing-ass goodie bags. Like, the thought that went into those was, Just mind-boggling, next-level. I struggled. That was all I got. Put a piece of paper in the elevator. It's not bad advice, actually. Not bad advice. We have three elevators in Miami, and we do put little whiteboard plaques out of the two bars in the front reception desk, but you're not wrong. A quick piece of paper in the elevator with some tape on it, done deal. That was all I got. That's all you got. What about the two of you? Obviously, you had a slight medical incident with your tooth, and outside of that, did everything go? go well? Was there any kind of failed issues or things that, again, like on a personal level, the two of you might change coming into a new event? We always try to come early, a day early or more if we can. Like we're going to come to Miami. So we already plan on being there for the entire week. And I think for this event, San Antonio, we didn't do a good job of ensuring we'd have our rooms in advance. Like we had them in advance. It's like when we showed up, we wanted to get into San Antonio at a certain time. We got in early. And then we ended up, you know, wandering around. for three or four hours while rooms are ready. And that is what it is. We just didn't plan well for an interim time frame. Well, and I had to work. So that was part of it too. I work a lot when we travel. So if we go an extra few days, she'll work from wherever we are. I will say the only thing we had one, and this is a personal thing, but one just little miscommunication, miscue. It was. Oh, yeah. I mean, we, We're having some swinger miscommunications. I know. I'm trying to be delicate about it. Like, you know how you have your cues, you have your words or whatever with your partner and significant other. And he was missing a few. He was missing a couple of cues at one point. And that's totally OK. We talk about it after. And it has happened before. It's happened before. But I'm like, outside of me going. Yeah. You're like sounding the alarm with your hands. Just get a foghorn next time. Just be like, moi. That's exactly what I need. Hey, dickhead. Pay attention to me. I love that. Do you have any gold star advice for couples that might be going to the to a club for their first time or an event for their first time or a resort or a takeover? Anything that you want to impart on the listeners of Wanderlust? The first thing is if you haven't done anything lifestyle and you're like, hey, we should go be swingers and you're going to go to an event, don't. Go do other things first. Go date some couples, do some trial runs, go to a club, go to a house party, but work out some of your communications. and boundaries and other things before you invest in going to a takeover event. I would love to see new people, but I don't want to see new people have a bad time if they haven't worked out how to be swingers and how to be their swingers. Like they're going to be different than us. We'll be different than them in the next couple. Right. So they need to work that out. Yeah. Just make sure that you're on the same page before you get into a situation. No. Hey, this is my hard. No, this is a gray area. Here's, you know, if I, If I wink twice, there's a problem. Say my grandmother's name. Oh, God. That'll kill the mood. Yeah, I say my grandmother's name. I'm like, oh, okay, red flag, red flag. It's not a bad piece of advice, actually, kind of ironing out those kinks in a, I think, lower pressure, lower financial time commitment definitely is something that I probably, over the years, haven't really thought too much about. And when we talk to people about, like, going to your first event, normally I think in terms of choose, which event to go to, not necessarily, hey, get your shit sorted before you get there, you know, and how do you do that through experience? Yeah. And I would say not only for your benefit, but for those around you, too, because if people are more aligned and they're more mature in swinging, then I think that everyone's going to have a better time in general anyway. And don't bring your immaturity or drama. And I don't mean that in a negative sense. I mean, you know, build up to that so that way you know how to have fun there. Be a good newbie. Be a good newbie. And I hate putting it that way because newbies in the lifestyle, it's such a bad rap. So do single men. Because there's good, there's bad, there's middle. They're human, right? Everybody's different. Everybody's going to have good things and bad things. Speaking of which, I kicked down your door at one point and let myself into your room. So I just want to openly on the podcast, just thank you both for being so hospitable to the event organizer that was basically making your terrain and busting in and eating my leftover food on your bed and drinking your shots and just generally being a hazard so thank you very much for that another memory it was our pleasure thank you seriously thank you for for doing that it made us feel welcome so i hope so but you know i can be definitely a lot and my jokes my personality not always the american culture gets so it's one of those things where you kind of feel people out and you're like oh okay these are my people like they get i'm not being too serious you know but i did I have a fun memory to share with you. Rob, I don't know if you remember or not, but on the last night after the club, found my phone for me. And earlier in that evening, one of our guests, she had been playing at the club in the theatre room and she came to me when they were about to leave and she said, I've lost my phone. It's my work phone. She was freaking out. And I said, well, where was the last time you had it? She said, in the theatre room. And I was like, all right, I'm on a mission. And I went into the theatre room and it was on one of the couch's arms, like in clear, visible place. And then roll on further in that evening. You know, everyone wraps up at the club. You guys have already left. I head back. We party, hang out in your room at two in the morning. I didn't even know. I went to my room and then I came back and I'm like, fuck, I've lost my phone. Rob walks into my room. It's on my spare bed and goes, that phone right there, clear visible space. So that was instant calmer at play. And I just wanted to share that fun little memory with you. That was a core memory for me. You have no idea. That was awesome. downing me with all sorts of gifts and putting it into a very small outfit. It was absolutely great having the two of you join us. And I know that you're booked for Miami already. So we'll see you there. And I'm looking forward to seeing you guys out in the pool in Miami. It's a little bit of a different setup at the hotel. So I'm really looking forward to seeing you guys out partying with us at the pool in Miami. That is my personal goal for May next year. So just prepare yourselves mentally for that. Perfect. Thank you so much, Kate. Thank you. Thank you. All right, guys, that has been Rob and Linza. If you want to find them there, anything but vanilla, and I'll put their links down in the show notes. What about wraps it up for today's episode. Thank you so much for listening to those interviews. I hope that you enjoyed hearing some different dynamics on the podcast, different ways that couples approach the lifestyle and approach events. Hope that you enjoyed hearing their stories. And I hope that that was both entertaining and educational for your own lifestyle journey. So once again, thank you to all of the guests that joined me on today's episode. You guys were absolute rock stars, and I appreciated talking to each and every one of you. So until next time, guys, that has been the Wanderlust Swingers podcast, and we'll catch on the next one.