Wanderlust Swingers - A Swinger Podcast Hotwife Lifestyle Stories
Cocksucking Train, Electrical Play More with Jason and Sarah
Cate sits down with Jason and Sarah, a couple from the Upper Midwest, who share their bold journey into the swinging lifestyle after ten years of monogamy. From a surprising encounter with a stripper in Las Vegas to getting yanked into their first threesome, this episode covers all the bases of a wild and memorable adventure. Jason and Sarah get candid about how they embrace sensory play, including electrical stimulation, and why Jason calls himself an overthinker, but still manages to dive headfirst into all the excitement. Get ready for foam pits, sexy trains, and a few life lessons along the way!
Episode Highlights:
Their First Threesome: Hear the details of how Jason and Sarah were suddenly pulled into a threesome for their first lifestyle experience, and how it all went down.
Foam Pit Fun: A line-up of men, a foam pit, and a cock-sucking train—Jason and Sarah spill the details on this unforgettable experience.
Sensory Play Exploration: They open up about their love for sensory play, including using violet wands, flogging, and spanking, sharing how these experiences have deepened their connection.
Lifestyle Events in the Upper Midwest: How do lifestyle events in their region differ from others across the country? Jason and Sarah talk about hotel takeovers and their favorite sexy travels.
Sexy Stories Sensory Play:
From steamy playrooms to sensory explorations, Jason and Sarah give listeners a peek into their bold and daring experiences at lifestyle events, along with a few sexy mishaps that taught them valuable lessons.
Lessons Learned:
Overthinking in the lifestyle? Jason, the self-proclaimed A+ overthinker, talks about how to quiet those thoughts and dive into bold new experiences. Plus, the couple shares the importance of learning from your "oops" moments and how it has shaped their approach to the lifestyle.
Conclusion:
Would they recommend taking the plunge into swinging for other couples? Jason and Sarah offer advice for newcomers, and Cate wraps up with some great tips for those interested in sensory play. Join us for this wild ride and don’t forget to check out more upcoming episodes and events!
See more of Sarah and Jason here on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/SwingingDownunder
Upcoming Lifestyle Events Links:
Looking to experience a hotel takeover? Join Libertine Events for upcoming takeovers in the USA, UK, and Canada! Learn more at: www.libertineevents.com
Join us in Miami 16-19th May, 2025 https://libertineevents.com/miami/
Join us in France 8-13th July, 2025 https://libertineevents.com/france/
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Tags: Sensory Play, Cocksucking Train, Swingers Lifestyle, Threesome Experiences, Foam Pit Fun, Violet Wand, Electrical Play, Overthinking in the Lifestyle, Swinger Adventures, Upper Midwest Lifestyle, Hotel Takeover Events, Non-Monogamy, Swinger Podcast
Transcript
A lineup of men with hard cocks and a cock-sucking train in a foam pit, electrical play, being yanked into a threesome for your first experience, and how to be bold when you're an A-plus overthinker. Today's episode is all about Jason and Sarah, a mid-northwest couple from the USA who started their lifestyle journey by going to a particularly handsy stripper in Las Vegas. A big thank you to Jason and Sarah for joining us on today's episode.
To see more of Jason and Sarah, head over to our behind the scenes exclusive content on patreon head to patreon.com forward slash swinging down under or find the link in our show notes don't forget to give us a follow on social media subscribe to our podcast and if you have time guys we would really love and appreciate a rating or review thanks so much for listening to the wanderlust slingers now let's get into the episode. You're listening to the Wanderlust Swingers podcast with Aussie hosts, Kate and Daryl.
If you're curious about exploring your sexuality or the swinging, hot wiping and non-monogamous lifestyle, you've definitely come to the right podcast. Or maybe you just love travel adventures. Either way, we share our personal, sometimes juicy, sexy stories, as well as Swingers club and event reviews, interviews with other sassy people, and of course, our global swinging adventures. We try to bring you a look into the diverse lifestyle that the swinging and non-monogamous community has. We hope you enjoy. Now, let's get into the episode.
G'day guys, and welcome to another episode of the Wlust swingers this is episode 187 and i am here with jason and sarah all welcome to the show guys thank you yeah thank you very much you get to peek behind the curtain because it's not as glamorous as as what people might assume creating podcast is so welcome to my studio aka zoom well you get the fancy lights on the wall. We do. They can change color if you like. They can change with the tempo of my voice. Turn it off. It's too crazy. But today's episode is going to be all about Jason and Sarah.
We're going to cover their lifestyle experience, how they got into the lifestyle. We're going to talk about sensory play, sexy stories, mistakes they've made. Basically, we're going to run the entire gambit of Jason and Sarah. So we're going to peel back your curtain, if I may be so bold. Ho-hum. I'm sure there's a sexy pun in there somewhere. There is. Now, you've been in the lifestyle now for how many years? Three years. Three years. Right. And before that, you were 10 years monogamous. Yes. Yes. 10 years monogamous.
And we had slipped into the, you know, we'll get together and like once a month, we like, all right, let's bang one out. And sometimes we would forget it. And yeah, it was just one of those typical situations. Yeah. Relations situations. Well, let's talk a little bit about you two. How did you guys actually meet? Was this on a dating site? Was this at your local bar? How did you guys actually find each other? Sarah turned 18 and went to the bar to do some partying and dancing. Wait a minute. Hold on a second. You guys are in the United States of America.
Now, in Australia, when you said someone was 18 and they went to the bar, I'm like, tracks because we can drink at 18 what's going on is it is in america like a complete 21 plus back then i don't know how common it is now i guess there's some but we had a lot of 18 plus nights so if you were over 21 you would get a wristband and then if you were 18 to 21 you could still dance and party and flirt and have fun but you just couldn't drink right i got wink wink got you yeah yeah wink wink got you okay cool sorry sorry to interrupt you were going to a bar yeah and i was there because i was going out to the nightclubs uh five to six nights per week and i would get to the clubs i would have a place where i would dance and go up and do my thing.
And Sarah saw me there and then eventually tried to get introduced to me and ended up being introduced to, well, she introduced herself to her ex-husband who, well, future ex- husband who was one of my friends at the time. Yes. So I, he used to be the guy who was dancing on the speakers with the glow sticks and I thought he was super dreamy. So I had a big crush on him. We never really were single at the same time. We went on one date, didn't go well. And then after that, I got married to someone else. He got married to someone else.
Both of our ex-spouses were people that were part of the same group that used to go to the same clubs every you know several nights a week and so then we both got married we both got divorced we reconnected on Facebook and I guess the rest is history right but sorry you said you went to the club I can't remember if you just said four to five times a week or five to six times a week because I was just so just I was like what so this explains why I see you guys so frequently out on the dance floor absolutely this is it this is what I'm it's all coming together now for me like the shoes the dancing I get I get it now I get it now which is awesome I love that by the way now I don't know much about your story getting into non-monogamy all I know is that there was a particularly handsy stripper in las vegas that's that's as much information because i wanted you to share your story with me um and and kind of get a real life experience so who the hell was this handsy stripper in las vegas like because let's let's no i'm just joking consent matters that's all i'm going to say but uh tell us about your story into monogamy to non-monogamy okay so we'll step back a little bit so my friend was getting my best friend was getting married again or renewing her vows in vegas in front of elvis impersonator and i decided that if my best friend's going to get remarried and her husband's going to be there and i'm going to be in the wedding i should throw a bachelor bachelorette party so we did that at one of the local dance clubs strip clubs and when we were there we first get there we got there early because for reasons and shortly after we got there one of the dancers comes up to us starts talking to us she's putting in the time and the effort she's asking me all sorts of questions about our background about what we're doing and at one point she asks me so have you guys ever been in a threesome and I completely panicked and I turned to Sarah and I'm like Sarah have we ever been in a threesome and Sarah's like what no yeah so during this whole time he's talking to this dancer I was trying to make myself as small as possible because I was very much in like mom teacher mode I didn't show skin I didn't act or dress sexy at all and my our friend that was getting married was like this is our wedding week my wedding weekend you're gonna dress sexy at night in Vegas and I was like oh god so Jason picked out a couple dresses for me and I was very uncomfortable it was off the shoulder it was very fitted except for this big ruffle thing in the front and i was just trying to be small and not be seen so then when he asked me that i was mortified i was like freaking out why would you ask me that question right and after shortly after I did that i figured out some way to pawn the dancer off on sarah because she wasn't leaving she'd already been there like 20 minutes more than that probably i mean it wasn't busy so she ended up getting next to sarah and every when she was next to sarah every 15 20 minutes she'd be like so do you want to go on a tour do you want to go on a tour and so sarah was consistently nope nope not right now maybe later as as time went on and we had a few drinks to loosen us up a little bit we got to a point where the dancer was asked and sarah's like sure we'll we'll go on a tour and so going into this weekend jason had said i just want to see you get a lap dance oh and so i was like i had agreed okay i'll get one lap dance i had never been to a strip club before i'd never had a lap dance it was shortly after things were kind of reopening from covid and so we had been told that the only way to get a lap dance at the clubs was to go back in the vip room right so i I think the way he got her to come talk to me was she kept she was asking him if we wanted a tour and he's like that's a her question yeah and um but then we bonded over she had a kid and we started talking about her kid and suddenly we were best friends and I had enough to drink I was like sure let's do it so right and she brings us back and she's like here's the place where we can have a lap dance for an hour and we're like i know we're we that's that's more than we need yeah it's a long time yeah yeah it totally is and then she brings us over to the place where you can get a half hour lap dance and at that time we're like okay that's what we're here for guess that's what we got to do right and so that's what we start doing and we get into this little booth chair thing and i'm sitting in the back of it and sarah is kind of standing there and she's like so here the well you tell this all right so she says to me she goes this is how this is gonna work and she takes my dress and pulls it down and i was like okay and I was wearing shapewear like up to my boobs you know because this was my first time wearing a fitted dress I was not going to not have everything tucked in yeah so I so here I'm standing in this shapewear thing and she goes this is what we're going to do I'm going to straddle this leg're going to straddle that leg.
We're going to rub our boobs together and basically walked me through doing a double lap dance for him, which was really fun and really hot and reminded me that way back in the day when I used to go to the clubs, I really enjoyed dancing with girls and things like that. And so it was really fun and I was getting turned on. So I start making out with Jason. My hand goes up his shorts and all of a sudden there's another hand up his shorts with Thank you.
things like that and so it was really fun and I was getting turned on so I start making out with Jason my hand goes up his shorts and all of a sudden there's another hand up his shorts with me and it was really fun and I didn't really I mean at that point I was already kind of all in so I was like okay well this is fun.
So you had some reservations kind of leading into it but as you were experiencing this you started to drop your guard a little bit become a little bit more comfortable and that was what was running through your head at that moment like when you when you were starting to feel a little bit sexy obviously feeling a little bit turned on and then you felt this other lady's hand like up the leg of your significant other's pants when you were monogamous at this point and wearing a tight dress for the first time and now all of a sudden you're on next to a stripper and like what did you think when you're when when you realize that ham was there what went through your head I don't remember exactly I just remember going oh okay well this is kind of fun and then like she and I were just kind of like we were touching hands while we were touching him and we were just kind of like oh and I don't know just being silly and then after we were all done with the lap dance, like it didn't go any further than that.
But then after the lap dance, she's like, thanks for sharing your husband with me. And I was like, well, okay, yeah, no problem. And then after that, we're like, I don't know what that was, but it was really hot and we need to make that happen again. And then we had really good sex for like weeks afterwards. I've got a question for Jason now. When you realized she was putting her hand up your leg and you realized that Sarah was about to realize what was going on, like were you looking to Sarah, her facial expressions for cues? Were you thinking, what the fuck were you thinking?
I was thinking, don't screw this up. Don't screw this up.
Don't interrupt what's going on this is different not expected this is more than a lap dance don't screw this up right okay good so you were like don't get hard don't get hard don't oh it's sarah's hand get hard get hard oh my god that's hilarious going back to you sarah you said there like that was you know jason picked this dress out for you it was a little bit slimmer cut than you used to kind of off the shoulders i always look back and think back to the first dress that i wore to a swingers club and then now what i'll wear out even to a music festival here if you were to rate that original dress on like a zero to 10 scale of like sluttiness versus maybe what you wear now, where would that dress sit?
10 being like super, super duper slutty. I don't know. I dress pretty slutty sometimes now. Four. Okay. Four now.
I think all the dresses that I wore that week that were real risque for me at the time now are like, not frumpy, but like I would wear them to now and at the time were you thinking like this is the sluttiest thing ever in the whole world like was it a nine and ten back then and now it's a four oh yeah absolutely I mean I don't know if I thought it was slutty but I was like oh this is really tight oh it's really short oh you might see a little bit of butt cheek if I sit down what's gonna happen you know yeah definitely they would Yeah, definitely. They would probably be about a four now. Right.
That's amazing. I love thinking about that. Just that first, first moments, first few dresses that you wear that are feeling a little, you know, if you're a conservative or haven't worn something like that before that, and then you look back now and you're like, Oh my God, it was basically at my knees. But in my head, in my head, my pussy was just hanging out all over the place like that. That was what I was thinking. Yep. Last weekend, we were at local Gay 90s Club. It's called the Gay 90s.
Sarah's skirt that she was wearing for her back to school outfit didn't even cover up a third of her ass. And I was working the door at the event. Well, if Las Vegas girl could see you now. I know.
event so well if las vegas girl could see you now i know let's talk about your then your deep dive in lifestyle so you said you went back home had some amazing sex i'm assuming some dirty talk ensued how how did you then take that leap from you know exploring another lady's hand up jason's shorts to getting in the lifestyle what happened uh we got home and we started talking about how do we make this happen again because that was that was amazing and the the first thing we we decided on like we're going to vegas more yeah and sarah's like yes we can go to vegas like once a year and maybe something like this would happen and that did not compute and i'm like how what if we go to Vegas quarterly?
Yeah. She's like, yes, we can go to Vegas like once a year and maybe something like this would happen. And that did not compute. And I'm like, how about if we go to Vegas quarterly? Yeah. She's like, oh, yeah, maybe we could do that. Like, what if we went to a strip club here? Like, no, we can't do that in Minnesota. Somebody might see me. I'm like, OK, let's figure this out. And I didn't know what to call what happened. So I started looking at all the different things. I went out on Reddit, looked at some Polly stuff, ended up finding a Swinger Reddit subreddit.
I read a lot in there because the stories are hot. Found some podcasts. And as I was going through the podcasts, I would sample like three, four episodes and just then move on to the next one to kind of see if anything kind of hit yeah and i surprisingly stumbled onto the jones's podcast actually i had your podcast in there as well and jay and angie's and casual swinger those were the first four that i had in the mix the third episode which is a episode, I listened to that. We got a thing. I listened to that one. The jealousy part really had nothing to do with lifestyle.
And early in our marriage, I had lots of jealousy issues. Like if Sarah wasn't around and I couldn't get ahold of her, my brain started freaking out. Listening to that podcast, I was like, well this is actually super helpful and Sarah had not the degree of some of that jealousy but she had some as well when I wasn't available so I suggested to her hey you should listen to this and well at that point he had been talking about hey I've been listening to these podcasts about swinging and it kind of fits with what happened in Vegas. And I was like, I'm not interested.
I don't want to see you kiss somebody. I don't want to see somebody else suck in your dick, like not interested. And then we were on the way to Costco one day and he just happened to put on the episode about jealousy. And I was listening to him like this is pretty good stuff you know whatever and then it got to the little snapshots they do at the end and i was like oh this is kind of hot so then i went to episode one and started binging like all the episodes and about episode 60 ish we had had another trip so the first trip was over fourth of july that summer and we had had another trip.
So the first trip was over 4th of July that summer. And we had had another trip to Vegas booked for October. And somewhere between there, I got to about episode 60. And I was like, you know, maybe when we go to Vegas, we should just check out one of those clubs that they talk about. And he's like, oh, good. And he opens up, he has like five tabs open of different clubs. He had already been researching, but didn't know how to bring it up to me because I kept saying I wasn't interested. He's literally like, here's something that I've prepared earlier and just like whams you with these tabs.
Oh, my God. It was awesome. Yes. We chose one and we went there. And that kind of goes into some of how we got into some sensory play kind of happened there then. We do want to talk about that because, you know, coming up in San Antonio next month, you're actually going to be helping us out with some sensory play. And I know I've seen some of your accoutrements before, so I know you've got like the Violent Wand and stuff like that.
Yeah, let's talk about how you got into sensory play and kind of what took you then from couple sex, maybe some more even vanilla couple sex into exploring a little bit more with each other and toys and sensory play and everything else. So when Jason and I started dating, I had never had a vibrator, anything like that. And he had taken me to a sex store and I was shocked at all the things there and bought me my first vibrator.
So we had kind of exploring some some basic toys that way which was a big deal for me but then when we went to vegas that second time we went to a club called whispers so it's like a house party basically and then they have this kind of like a guest house i don't know what it is but they have a few more playrooms in there and one of them they call it the princess room because they can't call it a BDSM room. And they had a volunteer and his wife and they were flogging people all night long. And I was curious about it because I was like, what is happening here?
And the guy did a really great job of explaining kind of some of the rules of BDSM. They have the rules posted with the different colors and what things mean. And he did a really great job of going through all of that with us but I was not ready to try it but all night long we'd go dance a little bit we and they had clothing optional karaoke which is why we chose that place because we love karaoke so we'd go watch the karaoke we'd walk around check out what's going on in the playrooms and we kept finding ourselves back in that room watching what was going on.
And finally, towards the very end of the night, the guy says, you know, I really get the feeling that you want to try this. No pressure. We're going to be closing fairly soon. If you want to try it, I'm happy to do a demo on you. And so I agreed and it was really fun.
And I discovered I actually really liked being flogged And I loved he was doing some flogging and then his wife would come in and she had a little different style and she would come in with soft ones and I just really liked it so then Jason bought like I don't know it felt like a hundred floggers after that and I'm seeing a trend here of Jason being the prepared one seeking out information reading reddit, listening to podcasts, having five tabs open on Vegas, seeing that you're like a flogger going and buying 100 of them.
Is it fair to say, Jason, that you're the kind of OCD planner of the of the couple? Absolutely. Yeah, Sarah is is not big on planning more than the next thing.
she likes to focus on what's coming up next and when you're planning trips or planning events or anything like that you you need to be thinking almost a year in advance yeah so that's where i fit in i i fill up the schedule and put all the things in sometimes i go a little bit overboard last year we did 38 lifestyle ish type things over weekends yeah well you and i had a conversation over a coffee um in canada and you were like well i don't know about next year and gosh we really want to come but there's this the weekend before and this the weekend after and geez i really should talk to sarah and then i kid you not it was like a day later you were like yeah i just decided we're gonna to go.
And I was like, did you actually have the conversation with Sarah or where are we at with this conversation? Yeah, he did. Yes. I just can't do all the planning and focusing. Like I can't be planning of thinking ahead to Miami when I've got San Antonio coming up, you know, we're going to Desire with WGT in November. And I'm like, I'm not worried about my theme costumes and all that.
I want to get through San Antonio first and then I'll focus on that so how do we go from the floggers then into like the Violent Wand and I I know that Jason last time you used the words it helped in your approach to slow things down and and I really want to talk about that as well like what that means to you guys as a couple when you talk about your sexual exploration because you've gone from again i don't know about this podcast vegas oh flogging excellent yeah so for me the way that i've traditionally approached just life is just plowing right through getting the things done doing the things very task oriented and research and research so we did the flogging.
I went home. We at that time we were in WGT. So they had a few people recommended a site. So I bought a few floggers. And the one thing I did not want to do is do anything that left a mark sensor or anything like that. So it was always about being soft. And we adapted some of the techniques around where instead of actual flogging, it's a lot of dragging.
I might set the flogger, the leather flogger down next to her nose so that she can just smell the leather might come in with a flogger that's basically just plastic and beads and just dragging that because it's that's more of a it's smoother smoother, it's temperature. Or bouncing it on the skin. Right. They've all got their different textures and how they feel. Because I've got one that's three feet long. It's made out of rubber. And the first time Sarah saw it, she's like, you are never using that on me. I'm like, okay, hear me out. Right. Hear me out. It's made out of rubber.
Your skin's going to get a little moist while we're playing with this. So there'll be some dampness. It's going to catch. It's made out of rubber. Your skin's going to get a little moist while we're playing with this. So there'll be some dampness. It's going to catch, it's going to pull, it's going to pull itself and it's going to be cold pretty much all the time. And that wasn't what she was expecting.
And so I, we've played with it a few times and it's a very unique type of sensation and when we were heading out to a meet and greet in indy what two and a half years ago two years ago two years ago ish one of the people that were going there was talking about how they had this violet wand and they did this electric play and i was very very intrigued on what electrocuting a person is which is sarah gets antsy whenever i say i'm electrocuting people it does it does conjure up images you know specific kinds of images that are not so great when you're talking about this and then you try to say oh but it's a sex toy wait a second what right i just don't like the word electrocute because it's not electrocuting it's just playing with the electricity electrostim electrostimulating how can we try to smoosh some words together and create something fun do what's called e-stim because that's kind of where we've moved into is the violent wand and then some of the e-stim type things like the tens unit but as we're going to this meet and greet in indianapolis somebody has said that they have this violent wand and they were going to do some electric play.
And I was extremely intrigued, mainly because as a kid, one of my uncles used to actually electrocute me and my brothers. He had this transformer that his dad had built from my grandpa and he would have me and my brothers.
One would grab one end of the cord or maybe i would grab both ends of the cord and when he turned it on we could feel the electricity going up our arm across our chest back out the other arm like we could feel it and we would play around with it like who could hold it the longest like extremely dangerous so we went and we did it i enjoyed being on the bottom with that and he cranked it all the way up and that was a lot of fun. But then when it came to working with somebody else with it, it's not something where you can be fast and you can be intense, but you can't just be fast with it.
You're not just getting it over with. It's something you have to take time and find the places that the person enjoys, find the way in which somebody wants to be touched so that they enjoy it. Because you don't want them coming away of the mindset that, well, this wasn't fun. Right. You know, that kind of just continued to help slow us down. And so in that, he had mentioned that I was not at all interested going into it.
And the guy who was doing the demo was really good at explaining different ways and talking about the safety with it while he was going through and when Jason was laying on the table and he was kind of doing some things then he encouraged me to come and I was like I don't know and he's like I'll be right here right with you you, if at any point you want to stop, we'll just turn it off. No big deal. And so he helped me to get comfortable doing it to him. And eventually I also took a turn laying on the bed and having it done to me.
And I didn't like the like more zappy or things that, you know, because sometimes it can be zappy. It's electricity.
I liked it when it was more massage like and it just kind of made the skin vibrate because i like that kind of sensory the soft so then we ended up buying one that weekend on the way home yeah so you like more of that that tingling sensation as opposed to the zapping right interesting but other people that we know love the zapping he likes it a little bit more zappy sometimes right i have to i have to get built up into it but my tolerance is much higher than saracis yeah using sex toys uh especially on on man penis owners is something that i'm constantly telling people to give it a go are there any other aside from the violent one then i know this is completely off topic but are there any other kind of sex toys that jason now you are using in the last three years how much time do you have kate go ahead yeah so well in the last couple years there's been this explosion of male vibrators yes i have a collection of those of course because why not but when it comes to e-stem there are a lot of options there for men.
Because you can just take a typical TENS unit if you wanted and just where do you want to place it? You could place it on both testicles. You could place it on the base of the penis and on the tip of the penis. One time I put a pad on the taint and then right above the base of the penis.
And for whatever reason, it was in the perfect spot that as it was going and i had my orgasm it was going straight through the prostate wow it was the most amazing feeling you should you should sell these i'm like we should buy one now do you have a favorite male masturbator then um or recommendations for people that might want to for the guys listening or the ladies listening that might want to buy their spouse, like a favorite? I have a couple that I go back and forth on depending upon how charged they are. I don't know what they're called. Okay.
So one just kind of holds itself on the side and it's got a little vibrator on the tip and it's got a little massage thing that vibrates on the bottom that hits the testicles. And the other one just kind of wraps around and then it's got a second vibrator on the tip. Let's connect afterwards. I'll get those names from you and I'll drop them in the show links in case anybody's keen to find out more about that. Let's move off of off of toys for a little bit.
Let's talk a little bit about events and travel because you just said you did 38 events lifestyle type events last year which is a hell of a lot for people to do now you guys are in kind of the upper midwest so what events do you attend locally and do you think that within the united states given you guys travel so much that the approach to the lifestyle varies give us all the goss the local events that we go to are from a local website it's interesting because they work within the summer season because the in the summer everyone goes camping so there are no hotel parties in the summer right and then over the fall and the winter there's about a hotel party a month whoa and then sprinkled in there there are one night they call them mansion parties there's an old nightclub that has some hotel rooms in it that they take over it used to be a wedding venue for a while as well there is a bar that they do meet and greets on every month or so and so we did all those locally and and there's pool parties and there's pool parties during the summer there are a couple of those yeah so that's a lot of what we do locally and those are fun but we mostly just go there to dance and hang out with friends right we kind of call it like a sexy prom it's kind of the vibe like everybody gets dressed in whatever the theme is and that's just kind of the vibe it's like a sexy prom sometimes they even have a photographer taking pictures cool and but they've got dj you know dancing and they've got the bar set up and there was a club that was in ohio for a while and they they actually let the club go so that they could focus on parties and we've been to a number of their hotel parties and their hotel parties are amazing yeah because they've got the big public playroom feel free to drop the name man i mean we're all about sharing here yeah it's it's play champagne play champagne right i've never been heard great things not just from you guys but broader i know that the way that they used to run their club in terms of being consent forward was was great so yeah play champagne i've i've heard nothing but great things so it's embassy suites right they do embassy suites for their hotel and so it's the four levels up the the rooms wrapped around they've got these giant tarps that they pull across to decorate up the place giant wall of speakers the djs are absolutely phenomenal great music all night long during the day they've got a few classes they always have a new room massage going on so party pool parties they they keep sexy events going on throughout the entire thing so those are much more those really get you in the mood and they also have vendor like they have a whole section of vendors similar to what you do at your libertine events they've got vendors set up they've got playroom set up they even have a little um what do they call the impact room yes it's sort of like a mini dungeon so they have a cross they have a spanking bench they have a few things kind of set up around this impact room and then they've usually got volunteers that will come in and you know professionals that will come in and do flogging they'll teach people flogging at the last one they also had fire play which we had never experienced but jason had been very interested in and again i was not at all interested in until the guy is like i'll do it on your arm and then that night we ended up going back to the impact room where he was doing demos all night long and i had some fire play done they had a violet wand guy they do it right the local ones are more like i said more sexy prom because they don't have playrooms they don't have those things and then of course we've been to several three four libertine events now mm-hmm yep two in miami montreal and then we've got san antonio and miami coming up again so what's what's the major difference in between between maybe some of that that local stuff do you think do you think that people are approaching the lifestyle vastly different i mean i know that at events a lot of people travel to anyway so you're always going to get kind of people from other other states coming in but do you think there is a huge difference in the approach to the lifestyle i don't think so at all i think it's i think it's more to do with the people organizing the events how you set up the sexiness is how the event will unfold because there's a there's a second group here in the twin cities that is kind of rebuilding from where they previously were when they got sold to another set of people.
And theirs is very much following that play champagne type of setup. We were so busy, we haven't had a chance since the changeover to go to any of those, but they seem like they might be more of what we're looking for from a lifestyle perspective. Okay. So yeah, it absolutely is the organizers and how they're setting up the events and the people that go to the events so consent is very important obviously there are always going to be people that try to push that at any event and it and how it's handled makes a big difference in the experience for the people that go.
Other than that, the approach itself to the lifestyle really doesn't seem to be that different. There are always in any group, I think there are going to be people that are just looking for people to have sex with that night. And there are going to be people like us who are really just trying to make friends and have a sexy time. And if more happens, awesome to be more that social sexy side of things.
I think one of the beautiful things about where we are today as well is there are so many events right because for a few reasons I mean competition is healthy it kind of should it should technically keep everybody on their toes to do better to learn new things to keep up with the times but also if you've got people coming out with new events, different events, then that might be better suited for that particular individual.
So I always tell people like you can find your tribe kind of like what you said with the podcast earlier, Jason, where you would skim through a few and say, that's not mine. I'll bench that. Or I really like that.
I mean, events are the exact same way, you know, that one's seems to be a similar kind of dynamic to us or the the owners seem to be similar to us so therefore the attendees are probably going to be pretty similar to us and kind of just goes from there yeah yeah exactly let's talk about some sexy stories even though you've been and i won't say only but you've been in the lifestyle now for three years but i would say in terms of what you've experienced and the and the depth of what you, you know, going to 38 different things last year, traveling around the country, meeting all these people, I would say that that's a fair bit of experience just from seeing what's out there.
And I'm sure there's probably a sexy story or two. Maybe share a couple. What have you got for me? A couple, maybe one or two sexy stories that just pop into your head or feel free to share some masturbation material. I'm always keen to hear what's in your spank bank. All right. So the thing that pops in my head first is something that recently happened. We were at a foam party and there were not a lot of people at this foam party. Some of our friends are there. We're having a great time. People are dancing.
All of a sudden we look over and there's two people fucking in the foam right next to us and we're like oh well that doesn't seem like a good idea because you got foam you got infected I mean like yeah lots of lots of stuff happening there and so another podcaster and I were chatting and and we were just like I can't believe they're doing that blah well what I didn't know was they wanted to do this blow job thing at the phone party. So their friend, all of a sudden we look over their friend is getting his dick sucked by his wife.
And all of a sudden there's another guy next to him and his dick's out. And then there's another one. And what's funny is like two days before we were talking to our friend about blow job roles. And I'm like, yeah, I'm just not interested in, I'm not interested in like going down random guys, not my thing, but we had actually met them in Miami at your event. And then we had kind of hung out with them all week in New Orleans. So anyway, I, I really wanted to play with him. Well, we really wanted to play with them, but we knew we would never have the guts to ask them because we suck at that.
So all of a sudden he joins the lineup and I was like, here's my chance. So I thought I'm going to go and have a turn with him and then I'm just going to back up and then I'll have had my chance.
And so I go and I have my turn with them and they're doing this thing where they're blowing a whistle and when it was time to switch and I start to back up and the other ladies are like, ah, to go down the row and I'm like oh shit so I look at Jason and he just kind of shrugs and I'm like all right went in Rome and so down the row I went and it was really fun the guy who I originally wanted to turn with ended up going to the end of the line and I got another turn with him and it and that's when I told him I'm like this is not something I'd ever be interested in normally but I really wanted to play with you and I knew I wouldn't have the guts and I like spilled my guts to him perfect and it was it was really fun it was really sexy I only knew two of the four guys in the row and didn't really care it was just a good time so that's awesome that one that you you decided to just like shoot your shot and and just kind of go for it but then to that when that lady said to you like uh-uh get down the line you know that you weren't like oh no no you know that you just kind of went you know what i'm here fuck it i'm gonna have some fun and that you walked away going that was actually a really sexy fun enjoyable moment for you that's awesome yeah and i watched for the first couple but then i spent the rest of time with the one guy's wife and we were sidetracked yes we were we were sidetracked we were making sure that the foundational pole wasn't moving we were holding it up as we leaned for 10 minutes it was it was hot it was fun and it was equally as fun besides what i was doing that was so outside of my comfort zone but looking over and watching the two of them just making out and getting all hot and heavy was really fun for me.
Probably as much fun as what I was doing. I went from, you know, earlier I had mentioned I didn't want to see anyone suck his dick or kiss him to I really like watching him and somebody making out and having a good time together.
I know the phone party happens in the middle of the day yes it's in a bar but it's still an open ish type area what was it like for you literally sucking a cock broad daylight you know because a lot of a lot of the sex can happen like under the cloak of darkness you know at two in the morning but doing something like that so out in the open in the in the you know the harsh light of day like was that like? Was it just adding to your level of excitement? I think so. I've always been somebody that's kind of like, oh, I might get caught.
Like that's been exciting to me, more exciting than we're going to go in the boardroom in Montreal and the playroom and do it on this humongous table under the bright lights, which we also did. And that was really fun.
Maybe that's your little story, but it was exciting was exciting but there was also there was a tarp kind of going around keeping the foam in the area so it was somewhat closed off we were at the edge where the foam like luckily the foam wasn't really getting over there that probably would have been a deal breaker if i could taste it or anything like that no it was just fun and like i said it wasn't super packed so it was just And and it didn't fit your preconceived idea of what was going to happen no not at all so it's a bit of spontaneous fun too which can also just be super sexy in the moment yeah yeah so we have the way that we do things which is typically we get to know somebody eventually we go on a play date and you know that whole process right that whole process may take months and you know we really want to know people or i should say sarah's more on absolutely needing to know someone yeah and because of my background prior to even getting married i dated a lot i had relationships with lots of different women at all different times so i'm kind of more of like whatever we're gonna do let's do it and i'll let sarah guide what the rate of it's gonna be and there was one time we had gone to a meet and greet we had gone through met a bunch of people so we need people's names ish was that when there was speed dating yes sorry it was yes there was speed dating um so we did the whole circle thing and at the end of the dance we're walking back to the hotel um we're down by the pool there's a slime glass door that's next to us that's open and there's a really good time happening in there so we just go go over there and take a look and i'm standing in the you know in the doorway just watching not trying to get involved was pretty sexy to watch There's about like 12 people in the room at least after a minute or so.
One of the guys is like, do you want to put your cock in her mouth? Oh, it wasn't a do you want to. It was come put your cock in her mouth. And I just looked at Sarah. I'm like, yeah, yes, no. Well, like I was fine, but I had to make sure that we were going to be on the same page for that. And Sarah's like, go for it. And so we did that for a little while. And then, well, the room itself got weird because there ended up being too many people in there. And there was one couple that was brand new.
And that brand new couple was telling their hosts that they're going to leave because it's too much. So the host was like, no. And they kicked everyone else out.
And so were like okay this is done cool that was fun and that the couple that I was engaged with they're like no just our room is next door oh wow how convenient right and so we ended up in there Sarah ended up spending some time with the guy i spent some time with the woman the guy was kind of the porn director kind of style very much which if if i were to present that to sarah like absolutely not this is not what we're gonna do this is this is not the kind of situation but in the moment and ended up being kind of hot there were some positions that we tried before that didn't work out that he was doing that I was like okay I can see how that works so it was yeah and it was super hot so so some spontaneous fun you can't you're not going to get away without telling me what this position was though what is this position that it's that very very porn it's you know the on the bed.
She's on all fours. He's with the one leg on the floor, and he's got the second leg up on the bed, and he's got the whole, and he's going through all that. And I'm like, so it's the height of the bed that makes the difference.
So then on the way home, just like the violet wand, on wand on the way home you ordered a new bed well no but but when we were in miami they've got the little benches at the end of a lot of the beds yes and that's where we figured out where we could find the correct height well because that was the perfect height and we're like absolutely the perfect height yeah and we're like oh that was great if we could find something that height well up in the playroom mickey happened to have the the little wave things that fit together to make like a little bench and it was the exact same height as the benches at the end of the beds so we ordered one of those wow there you go there we go that's awesome well see both of those are spontaneous so it's interesting that you guys that both of your sexy stories are more on the spontaneous side because you've just said that you know you the way that you generally tend to do things but both of those kind of highlights are like fuck it let's get involved and let's have a bit of a soiree bit of fun and not really overthink it I actually said on a podcast just recently that sometimes a little just a little something different something new can be really very exciting.
And, you know, you don't necessarily have to go into deep, meaningful conversation and to do things that may be a bit too full on. You can just have a little bit of a twinkle and then kind of go on your way. So that's awesome. I love that. Thank you for sharing. Hot seat questions. So we're going to put you on the hot seat. We're going to do things a little bit differently. So normally when I put people on the hot seat, this is normally me asking them some questions that I'll see you next time.
hot seat questions so we're going to put you on the hot seat we're going to do things a little bit differently so normally when i put people on the hot seat this is normally me asking them some questions that are probably like a bit clickbaity a bit um taboo but instead we're just going to do these real quick so i want you to answer as quickly as you possibly can uh what you go to signal when you want to leave in a venerous situation we don't really have one yes but the only thing is the look on your face right now of just absolute shock like yeah yeah the only signal that i've ever used that actually worked is i did the hand across the neck where i was like no cut this off cut cut okay yeah and i used it once and i haven't used it since because there had been a line that had been crossed and i was more saying hey let's back up a little bit right but came across as a red and you know whenever you say red you're like roll out yeah right yeah and so that kind of were the night was done at that point but that's what you got a favorite piece a favorite toy or piece of sensory equipment sarah uh my favorite toy that we have is a DP toy.
It's like a cock ring, and then it has this little thing that comes up that kind of articulates. So then it ends up being a DP toy, and it's just the right size. And then when he's thrusting, it's also thrusting, and it's a lot of fun. All right. And yours, Jason? The magic wand with Sarah. Oh, okay. All right. I like that.
What's one fantasy that you haven't fulfilled yet i don't know that's tough but yeah i think just maybe more group situation maybe i don't know i don't know oh well that's a topic for you guys to think about later then maybe uh while you're having a coffee today what was one oops moment that you had during a scene event? Which one? Okay. So the first time we went to Desire, the very first night I decided I'm going to help Sarah out with her whole exhibitionism thing. And so we went back to the playroom.
We, we did all of our playing and you know, we're very early in the lifestyle where we go through our motions. We have our orgasms, and I'm at the point of, like, I'm done, like, there's nothing else. And during our entire encounter, our time together in there, there had been this other couple that had started at the edge, and they're kind of getting closer and closer. They weren't crossing any lines, but they were just getting closer.
I was paying but i knew that it you know in my head wasn't a big deal well when i orgasmed sarin was in the doggy styles position and so she started just reaching up afterwards to just grab the lady's hand because she thought she she saw the magic and i saw the magic too like she was going to touch the lady's hand explosive orgasm rainbows butterflies unicorns and it was going to be amazing but that's not what happened so she we had been making eye contact the whole time i was riding him and what all the things and as soon as my hand touched hers i got yanked over into a threesome with them and we had never played with anybody before so this is literally our first play experience and I'm in this threesome and I'm like I don't know what's happening and Jason had just come so he was done and he's just kind of laying behind me like pretending to go through the motions and yeah the guy kept like asking if he could fuck me and all this stuff and I'm like I've never even played with anybody before and we.
And we're soft swap only, I think. And I don't know what's happening. And it was, yeah, it led to some really uncomfortable conversations after that. Because it was kind of hot, but also, like, what the fuck just happened? And that was not how we wanted our first play experience to go. And I felt really bad about it.
And it just, yeah, it didn't set the best tone for our first week at desire ever god i bet obviously we go back twice a year so yeah yeah it wasn't too bad what's your top tip for couples looking to start in the lifestyle jason top tip just one that's all you got talk a lot talk a lot okay all right let's roll back uh as we get ready to close out, I to talk about some mistakes so it's not all as you just said it's not all rainbows lollipops candy canes and unicorns what mistakes have you made and what how do you think that might have shaped your how you've now approached things in lifestyle like has there been something that has been i guess a little bit fundamental a mistake that was made that now you kind of avoid that situation like the plague or you're much better at navigating it?
Is there something that kind of comes to your mind that would fit that? I think it's an ongoing thing where we just get better at talking about it and figuring it out is that I tend to get a little, in the moment, I tend to get wrapped up into the excitement and the sexiness and kind of swept away and don't always realize that he may be getting left behind or not as involved or whatever. And so we just every time that comes up, we just talk about it. And sometimes it leads to some tough evenings and tough nights. And we just keep talking about it and setting a plan.
So I would say as far as how it's changed, how we approach things is now we really try to be more mindful of we're just going to we're going to socialize, we're going to have sexy fun. And not so much like, are we going to be able to make a connection that's going to lead to play? It's more, let's just make friends, have fun, and then we're going to go have a really great time together. And if there's somebody else involved, awesome. And if not, that's okay. So, and I'm working on not getting wrapped up. Do you still, well, say you were getting wrapped up.
Say you were on the dance floor some, actually you're at Play Champagne, you've met a great couple, you're having a bit of a connection and you are interested you're getting maybe wrapped up is there something now that you would pause quite comfortably and go and have a conversation with jason because i know when a lot of couples get in the lifestyle they're like how do we how do we like start to talk when we're you know when we're in amongst this and we're already in a in a group situation how do we talk and i'm like you quite literally just stop and say i'm gonna go talk to my partner it's super easy and the other couples will be receptive to it and if they're not they can just fuck right off um is that what you do now i mean if you were at play champagne you had this couple what would you now do you're having a great time you're feeling it you're feeling the vibes you're getting wrapped up what would you do now we're actually still in the we're working we're working on that piece now right um kind of some of the things that we've worked through is we've we've spent time differentiating between somebody doing something intentionally versus something just happens right and so you know things that happen we're like okay well this happened let's do it a little bit different that but next time that's really helped us detach away from getting angry about how things have worked out or how things have turned out in the night i'm working on being more bold which has been helping out yes i'm more of a laid-back kind of guy there's a while where people were like oh jason doesn't play i'm like well actually i do i'm just not very in your face about it yeah so that's awesome it's a work in progress we're inching along not jumping yeah well i mean it's kind of like your example in the phone party before you know Sarah you went and you were sucking some cock and everything else and Jason was at first watching but then was bold enough to take the move with one of the one of the gentleman's uh partners so I get that it when you're going into these situations and Jason like do you have to are you hyping yourself up or are you just constantly in your head like do something out of character how do you how do you kind of do that what i found out actually on our very first desire trip is i had very high anxiety and in and one of our dinners i total panic attack came back got onto some meds for that and i after about a week i was like so wow like, so, wow, this is how I'm supposed to feel.
Cause I would do the, I would live with rage every single day. Right. And that's, and that was, that's actually probably the biggest thing I've gotten out of the lifestyle is that I'm not angry all the time because it opened that door for me to approach that.
And so I just kind of like look for something that I can do and that's something i'm actually really good at so if i decide that i'm gonna do something i can just do it okay sometimes i have to actually make that decision to do it yeah because if i if i decide i'll do it yeah so you're kind of more task task oriented then right but we both tend to get in our heads sometimes at events who doesn't actually probably there are there are probably people out there just blissfully living their life like happy as a clam and not overthinking things it must be nice definitely not here definitely not here i really appreciate you guys uh sharing your journey for us and i know you've got some travel coming up well i get to see you next month and then you mentioned before you've got desire in November so you've got a couple of awesome things on the radar already so I'm kind of keen to hear how that goes but I'm also keen to see you guys uh in San Antonio one of the things I always tell couples is like have something you're going to try and do so Jason every time I see you I'm going to be like have you been bold today oh that's going to be my my little thing have you been bold today um and see how you guys go any anything you want to leave the audience with today as we get ready to wrap up the podcast nothing I can think of I know we're really excited for San Antonio and actually we kind of think inside secret we kind of think that being in sort of a host or co-host mode is going to be really good for us because it'll kind of make us get out of our heads because we love hosting and we're great at that and it'll give us a different focus and we're really excited about it so awesome yeah and yeah and the only other thing i can leave people with is that even though sarah and i talk a lot about the things that have been challenging for us we're there for it for every single challenge because it's been the best adventure ever it's worth it even though there are some hard times there's also some epic ones as well oh yeah absolutely you too could suck some cocks in a foam pit you know don't sell yourself short take that first step get that tighter dress and uh in three years time you could be sucking some cocks in a foam pit you never know where your journey's gonna take you absolutely thanks very much for joining guys everybody else we'll see you on the next episode and for now have fun be safe and enjoy your life thanks kit
