Wanderlust Swingers – A Swinger Podcast Hotwife Lifestyle Stories
EP198 – Cap D Agde Desires, What’s in the Box and How to Small Talk
Cate’s fresh back from Miami (just her this time!) and while we only touch on that wild weekend, we’re diving deep into what’s really heating things up: our return to Cap d’Agde in 2025, a brand new sex toy, and Darrell’s spicy fantasy.
In this episode, Darrell receives a mystery box that leaves Cate both suspicious and very curious. Spoiler alert: it’s a new toy — but it’s not one we’ve ever used before. Unboxing it live kicks off a conversation about impulse sexy buys, techy pleasure, and how this toy might play into fantasy fufillment.
We’re also answering a great listener question from a hotwife couple in New Zealand: How do you make small talk in the lifestyle when talking about work and kids feels out of place? From flirting in loud clubs to deep connection at weekend events, we’ve got practical tips, sexy one-liners, and a few hilarious fails to share.
And finally — we’re going back to the Naked City! Cap d’Agde 2025 is on the horizon and we’re already fantasizing about beachside play, group massages, and balcony sex in the hot Mediterranean sun. This isn’t just a trip — it’s a sexual state of mind.
What you’ll hear in this episode:
Mystery Box Reveal: Darrell’s new toy arrives and Cate’s imagination runs wild
Lifestyle Small Talk: Flirty questions, fun energy, and how to connect without asking about someone’s 9–5
Cap d’Agde Desires: Why we’re going back and what (or who) we want to do when we get there
Darrell’s Fantasy: How we're fulfilling it without putting anyone at risk
Be A Better Swinger Tips: Mindset matters — whether it’s packing for Cap or chatting up couples at a club
Links:
Website: www.wanderlustswingers.com
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@WanderlustSwingers
Libertine Events – Texas Takeover: https://libertineevents.com/sanantonio
Email: [email protected]
Are you coming to Cap d’Agde in 2025? Do you have a fantasy you’re dying to try? Or want to see what was in the box? Drop us a line — we love hearing from you!
Tags:
Cap d’Agde, Swinger Podcast, Non-Monogamy, Hotwife Lifestyle, Sex Toy Reviews, Fantasy Play, Open Relationships, Swingers Club Tips, Lifestyle Small Talk, Hotel Takeovers, Ethical Non-Monogamy, Wanderlust Swingers Podcast, Libertine Events, Voyeurism, Group Play, New Sex Toys
Transcript
you're listening to the wanderlust swingers podcast with aussie hosts kate and darrell if you're curious about exploring your sexuality or the swinging hot wiping and non-monogamous lifestyle you've definitely come to the right podcast or maybe you just love travel adventures either way we share our personal sometimes juicy sexy stories as well as swingers club and event reviews interviews with other sassy people and of course our global swinging adventures. We try to bring you a look into the diverse lifestyle that the swinging and non-monogamous community has.
We hope you enjoy, now let's get into the episode. G'day everyone and welcome back to the Wanderlust Swingers podcast. This is episode 198, Cupdog Desires, What's in the Box and How to Small Talk at Swingers events. G'day Daryl. What's in a box? What's in my box? Yeah, maybe. Maybe. Who knows? Who knows? So there was a box, a mystery package showed up at our door. Daryl is being suspiciously quiet and I'm curious what's inside. I'm sure it's probably not safe for work, so we'll get into that later in the episode.
We've got a listener question from a curious hot wife couple based out of New Zealand, a couple of Kiwis. They want us to talk about small talk, which is going to be fun. And then finally we're heading back to the naked city in Capdard, France, and we're going to talk about expectations, desires, and fuckery.
Okay what's up and fuckery and fuckery i just got back from miami which was extremely in contrast to the weather that we're currently experiencing here in the netherlands because it was sunny and beautiful and hot and sweaty and glorious it was like that for a few weeks for us actually we had like had like six weeks of that. Yeah. Well, no, not six, but, yeah, it was, I think, again, I think the Dutch weather likes to gaslight us, you know. You mean the Dutch seasons like to gaslight us.
It's like summer's coming, oh, and Kate's about to take all of the jackets and everything off the hooks at the door and then, bam, we're just back's a bit of a letdown actually because going from clothing optional pool being topless drinking cocktails and talking to people and then coming back here and it's like overcast and raining it's cold man there's saunas man i also just want to before we get in the episode give a quick a quick sincere thank you and shout out to a few people.
Last episode, I had Miche on the podcast and we spoke about sexual trauma and how that might impact your swingers lifestyle journey. And it was obviously a very heavy episode, very personal.
And I had a few close friends that reached out before the episode went live because I was a little bit nervous and then directly after you know just thanking me for putting myself out there and thanking me for being so vulnerable and so I want to say thank you to everyone who listened to that episode I realized it was a hard episode to probably listen to hopefully some of you out there now see feel a little bit more seen as I do when my friends contacted me after and gave me that empowerment. So cheers, guys. Really appreciate that.
Do you have any questions, Daryl, about my time in Miami, perhaps? Did you enjoy it? I did enjoy it. Beside the heat? Oh, that was glorious. Do you want to know if I perhaps wanted to have sex with anybody? Because I did. Yeah. There were some hotties. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Okay. So that was it. So you had to keep the kitty to yourself. Yeah, she does get a little out of control sometimes. Rarely, but sometimes. Yeah. Oh, and a really funny moment. I haven't actually told you this, so I'm going to share this on the podcast live with you.
On the Sunday pool party, I was standing near dj booth standing just in front of it and i was walking to the pool and a gentleman walked past and he had what appeared to be some sunburn on his shoulders and of course i was tsk tsk i was in i was like hey hey my man my man did you say my man i was like hey hey dude my man my man come here i don't know why i was just why the fuck would you have said that because i was drinking cocktails and I was feeling the vibe. The music's playing. my man. I was like, hey, dude, my man, my man, come here. I don't know why.
Why the fuck would you have said that? Because I was drinking cocktails and I was feeling the vibe. The music's playing. My man. And there was like Ibiza vibes going. I mean, you might as well have bro'd him. Hey, bro. Anyway, and I stopped him and I was like, hey. Put some fucking sunscreen on. Do you have sunscreen on? And he was like, yeah, yeah. And I was like, because you're looking pretty burned, I've got to be honest.
And he said, Kate stop bothering me like I have sunscreen on and I knew he had something on his nipples but I was too focused on the sun on the on the sunburn so I really didn't think anything of it like my peripherals knew there was something on his nipples whatever later throughout I don't know how long a period of time later maybe 20 minutes or something I was then talking to another friend who was standing there a male in front of me naked and i was talking to him for a little while just chatting away and i think i was about to offer him a drink or something like that and then i realized he had something on his nipples and i looked down and it was my face so one of the guests uh had printed nipple pasties dnm is their initials they had printed no stickers of my face and they were walking around putting them on everyone's nipples.
Nice. And I think there was like 30 people walking around with my face on their nipples on the Sunday pool party. It seems legit. I just think it's funny though that I was. That's hilarious. I cracked up laughing. Fucking weird but hilarious. Everybody around was waiting for me to notice but I was obviously like just talking to people and looking at them in their face hole and I hadn't... Bullshit. They were naked. You were just looking, staring at their cock. That's all it was. You were just eyeballing the cock. For next time, D&M. D&M? Yeah.
Yeah, just put it on the heads of the penises of the guys and Kate will notice it immediately. The ladies were wearing them as well. On their nipples? Yeah. Yeah. You'd probably see it on the nipples more likely on the ladies. It was just so funny. They were all waiting and I finally caught on. It was one of those moments like, you idiot. This has been happening for 20, 30 minutes or whatever it had been. And it was just a little surprise that they wanted to throw out there.
And I'll show you a photo, but the day after our event, so I think it was Tuesday, I got a photo from somebody who'd been at the event and um one of my faces was one of my face stickers was like sitting poolside and shame in shame and they were like well still here in uh in spirit sitting there sadly beside the pool in shame but that's what's up so show us your dodgy cardboard box you've already seen the dodgy cardboard box what you want to know about is what's inside it's looking a bit beaten up but yeah what's inside show us your box darryl i'm not gonna not gonna tell you that yet first i'm gonna ask you some questions okay well hold on can i ask you how did you come to order this product or is that going to give the game away?
Not at all. I was sitting on the couch as you do. I had a glass of wine in hand. Ah, so it was a drunken purchase. Not a drunken purchase, no, but it was certainly a spur of the moment purchase. It wasn't, there wasn't a lot of thought put into it other than, yeah, other than some thought, I can't mention what the thought is right now, but we'll cover that later. But there is some thought into it, but not really solid thought. I half expect that this will either end up being thrown out. Well, I half expect it will end up being thrown out. Okay. But that's where I sit at the moment.
Is this something that is more in line with something that you have desires for more than me? I'm about to ask you a question. So what are some of Daryl's key desires that we couldn't celebrate, that we couldn't do because of comfort, safety, blah, other things? What's? Gimp mask. What?
When the fuck have I wanted to wear a gimp mask i wanted a gimp mask i don't know what what are my what are my desires well you like hot wifing you like me being a slut you like me being with multiple oh is it like some sort of cum thing well you're not guessing you're supposed to be answering the question that is, but you're not supposed to guess. You have a desire for – is that some dude's sperm in that box? Did you, like – Yes, I milked a man. Did you order sperm online? I ordered man milk online. Yes, that's exactly what it is. You have a desire for, you know, sex in dark alleys.
And this kind of all stems from – Sex in dark alleys. The hot wifing kind of scenario of me being a slut and me just being unapologetically sexual. And that has subsets and one of which is having a man come inside of me. So that could be in the box. Could be fake cum. Could be real cum. I don't know. Maybe there's realcum.com. That's a business opportunity. I'm sure there is realcum.com. I'm sure that's not a business opportunity. Do you want to look real quick? We don't need to. That exists. No, let's do it. I don't know why.
Because the people are at the other end now going, man, God, we've already Googled this before we came. We all know that the realcom.com exists. Realcom.com is coming soon. It's a domain that is currently held. Yeah, it's coming soon. It's come. Actually, no.
I think they've missed a serious opportunity there oh guys boring step it up step it up so what are your desires and how are they so dissimilar but how are they dissimilar to mine my desires are pretty similar ish in that like and we're going to talk about carp dog i like to be desired that's definitely a desire like that's a A desire fetish i don't know nobody nobody has that you're the only one ever to want to be desired that's because i'm special except for everyone ever i like to be desired that's nice and i like to be fantasized about that's nice yeah because we've been sharing stories backwards and forwards about being fantasized about lately we've been kind of sharing some erotica between the two of us and that kind of that's again that kind of stems and little things kind of stem off of that and sometimes that might include things like being being used but again like the reality of that and the fantasy of that are probably two different things can we get on to the box yeah of course we can can you give me a theme song for what's in your box what's in your box in, in your box.
No. What's in your box today? Hey, hey. What's in your box. Okay, that's enough because otherwise we'll get in trouble. Probably. 15 seconds, right? That is, what's that from? I feel like Sesame Street or something. No, I don't think it's Sesame Street, but it's something like that. It's like a kid's show. Yeah, which this is not. This is adults only. So, Daryl, what's in your goddamn box? Well, you've got to open it. Oh, you want me to open it? You're not going to open it and show me? No. Oh, okay. No, you can open it. All right, let me just rustle around with this.
This is beautifully packaged, I have to say. It's not a fucking present. Is it not? Well, I mean, it depends on how you feel about presents. Oh, my God, I was so fucking right. I'm right. Yeah. Jeez, I'm good. Yeah, but. I didn't cheat either. No, I didn't, but what's the. How do you know I didn't? Because I've had it in my possession the whole time. Yeah, but I'm pretty sneaky. No, you're not. Yeah. Yeah. So forgetting this one, because this one's a side note. Pass me this. You don't need this one for now. This is a side note. Okay. This is not a driver for that.
Oh, this does not go together. They do, but that's not a driver for it. Okay, this is fake cum. Yeah. So this is a side note okay this is not a driver for that oh this is not go together they do but that's not a driver for it okay this is fake cum yeah so this is fakecum.com no no it's artificialcum.com artificialcum.com not like the sugar we saw once that remember we were at a starbucks and it had fake cum a fake sugar sorry fake sugar was the you remember when we went to starbucks that time and was selling fake cum? Oh, man, Freudian Starbucks slip.
And that's why Starbucks has gone out of a business in Australia. No, I don't think so. I don't think they're serving that. Okay, so this is Lode Classic Hybrid Formula Cum Lube. Yeah. With extremely small font, either that or I'm… You don't need to read the whole fucking thing. I'm now over 40. I don't know.
one of the two definitely the second one i'm just curious about like its ingredients i've already looked at its ingredients and none of them are you know vaginally explosive all right so okay so we have uh we have come like lube which is white and creamy and what so it doesn't go with that so well it can but hang on but this is a side note this was bought as a side note what's so what's't go with that. Well, it can, but hang on, but this is a side note. This was bought as a side note. What's, so what's my interest in that? To simulate.
Yeah, but what, but okay, so give me a rundown of the beginning to end what you think, how you think I would like that to be used. I don't think you want to eat it out of my pussy. No, it's fake gum for starters and even real gum's not really on that list for me. So I'm going to cross that off immediately. I don't think that you're interested in eating it out of my pussy. I think what you would like is either for me to use a toy or to have it up there.
And I can imagine you wanting to see this running out of my pussy and then having some sort of storyline around you coming home and me having a man that's just like left and I've got cum in my pussy and then you want to either watch it run out of me while you fuck me or watch it run out of me over the top of my arsehole and then fuck me. Yeah, so, I mean, you've just covered the entire thing. Oh. Yeah. I'm so good. You are amazing. Where's my round of applause? Or could it be that I'm just communicating my interests, my sexual interests really well?
No, it's that I am a fortune teller person and if you call 1-800 Kate Fortune Teller, it's $9.99 a minute. Okay, so 1-800 doesn't work in any other country other than Australia, but hey, here we are. Is it really? Yes. Oh, whatever. 555, I know stuff. No, five is also not a thing. Whatever. Movie numbers. Yeah. That's it. Yeah, okay. I am amazing and give me your money. So there you go. That's the end game here. Right, what's the cock? You've got a king cock sitting on you. Well, I do, but this was kind of a side note, like I said, because I'm not sure that this is even.
So you went online to buy the come look. Yes. That's okay. So this small bottle was your primary purchase. Yes. And the cock that you have sitting on you was a upsell? It was a secondary purchase because. People who buy this also happen to buy this. When I searched for that, this came up as well. Okay.
And I would i would i be interested in seeing this happen yeah and would you be interested in doing this and essentially this is all for me of course this is this yeah fuck you kate we don't want any orgasms for you there's not a lot in i mean there's not a lot of um don't get me wrong there's not a lot of fantasy can you hear me the kingcock yep okay so Okay. So what I didn't realise is that the king cock came with also – What does it come with? Well, it comes with a baster, basically, a turkey baster and also a thing of cum lube. No, no, it doesn't come with cum lube.
It comes with jizzled juice. Yeah. Jizzled juice. I know. This is king cock. I refuse to say that. Jizzle juice. And it's real deal, life-like skin. Mm-hmm. And it has balls. Of course it does. I mean, it's got to come inside you when you're playing with it. Yeah. Do you want to open it up? I also thought this might be a delivery, potential delivery method if need be, if, you know. Oh, that is. Okay, so in, while I'm opening this. Hey, wow, you actually managed to open that ball. Do you want me to get into it like a savage raccoon like I normally do? Like you normally see human.
They obviously make these for very stupid people. That's why I can open it. What about those other ones that lay the eggs and stuff? No. That's too far for your fantasy then. No, I don't. I mean, I don't. Not too far. That's the wrong word.
You're just not interested in that kind of fantasy no i don't have an interest in in alien play like play this is this is not about alien this is about as you covered this is about you being somewhat uh slutty and used and me being able to then reclaim you essentially sorry about all the plastic guys this is um just opening it's not a very big thing of jizzle juice yeah i gotta be honest the um the load classic is a much bigger is a bigger i don't think you know i was gonna put this up on social media to show people what's in our box but i think this shit will get me taken down immediately without a shadow of a doubt i mean i don't think ah meta you're a hater unless you well you might be able to if you um you if you seriously blur the blur the large dildo that comes with it.
Yeah. I tried to do that one time with a toy and I put like a blurring on the top of the cock and they were still like – They're going to blow the whole cock. We know what that is. Yeah, but I feel like even if I put my jizzle juice up – I don't think so. Jizzle juice could be something that you sprinkle on ribs for a rub. For starters, this is fucking big. Well, I – Did you realise it was this big? No, it doesn't give... Nothing ever gives you girth. That is huge. I mean, it's heavy is what it is. No. It's not huge. Look at the thickness of this bad boy. Sweetie, you've been on bigger cocks.
Oh, fun story. While I was in Miami, the blow-up unicorn in the pool started to deflate and I was like, it's seen its days. And so I was lying on it trying to get the air out of it and then I was trying to push it into the bin and there was a bunch of naked people in the pool and they were laughing at me. They're like, Kate, what are you doing? It's not going to fit. And I said, hey, with some lube and some patience, anything will fit. It was close, nearly the quote. I know what your thing is but that's what I said and they laughed their asses off so you made me funny by default.
So you're half stealing my jokes. I'm half stealing your jokes. Because you didn't even get the joke right. Well, I don't like your version. My version's awesome. No, it's not really. But I was about to say, so is your interpretation that with lube and patience this is going to fit inside my pussy? It wouldn't even take that much lube or patience to get that to fit in your pussy. Let's try this today. Okay. Not the squirting bit. I just want to see you put this in my pussy. Okay. Because I feel like this is going to be no.
I feel like you should understand that beside the girth, it's the same length as my cock. This is big. Get your cock out real quick. No. Lame. We're not doing that here on a podcast. This is not a thing. You're not a team player, Daryl. I am.
I'm playing right now for the team on the other end of this podcast who doesn't want to hear i can almost not fit my my hand around this look at that okay that's huge it's not huge okay i'm gonna send a photo of this to mallory and i'm gonna say hey and she's gonna be like write it she's gonna be like that's that's tuesday that's tuesday It's not even Wednesday cock. All right, so you want to use that. And do you want to go through an elaborate storyline or are you just happy to – No, the storyline's the important part. Oh, so you want to come home from being out somewhere.
Either that or you've gone out and come back. Okay. So, yeah. Okay. I mean, that would mean you're leaving the house, though. Yeah, I don't like that one. It seems like a lot of effort. Yeah, and this is, I think, will be the – this is why I expect that this will end up more – likely end up in the bin. No, we can do it. It's the effort that's required. I was going to say, it is a lot of effort. That would be the thing. Like, fantasies generally tend to be more effort than your average.
Yeah, it's probably less effort to actually you go out and shag a dude and get going in your pussy than it is to actually. Nah, you're talking about finding single men. I know. All I'm talking about. That are tested and ready. I'm not talking about any of that. See, now you're adding all these caveats. I was just saying it's easier to just go to a bar, find a guy, get laid, come home. That's what you're saying.
Not find a decent single man in the lifestyle that knows etiquette and no because they're fucking impossible in the last two weeks or anything crazy like that that's we've never had a problem with that i'm just playing i know um okay so this is so you want a fantasy and you want to play this out and then you want to possibly well hold on a second the jizz the sorry the load classic then is just for that fantasy of the cum side of it but how did you see the big cock basting other fantasy it's not that's not that's not part of the fantasy this isn't part of the fantasy this is just an additional that was just like i said i did a search for that for the load and this came up as well and i thought that might be interesting right so i bought this works.
All right, I go. Okay. Well, we're going to try and push this into me later because I am hesitant to believe that this is going to fit. Hey, we've been talking about this, quite frankly, giant cock. I'm just going to put it on my desk. That's the what's in the box segment. Thank you very much for the Lode Classic Dizzle Juice baster. So I have a question or a survey for the group. Oh, for the audience. Yeah. For the listeners. I'm curious. I want to know the percentage.
Knowing what you know of Kate to this point, I want to know whether you think it'll end up in the bin being unused or… Sold on Mark Platt.
Or used once and then in a bin or never used i shall i shall keep that on my desk okay cool okay all right hey we got a we got a question from a listener they asked they actually sent me a message and said hey we're trying to find this specific topic in your podcast and i said we have almost 200 and i we ramble a lot so i have no idea if we have covered this before uh so here we are we're actually going to cover it so this one is from vna they are the spicy hot wife couple in new zealand which is pretty rare we hear from kiwis it's always lovely to hear from you guys in normal In normal life, small talk equals jobs, kids, weather.
That doesn't fit in a club. How do we connect with people in sexy settings? How the fuck do we make small talk in a swingist lifestyle? Dude, it's origin story always. Is it origin story always? Not always. I mean, that's always a good... Let's talk tips....good door opener is to ask about their origin story, how they got into the lifestyle. And then there's a follow-on to that, what they're into. And that gives you then, it's two things there, gives you an understanding of what they're into, which might come in handy later if you do decide to play with them.
The other thing is you can start to understand whether they're your cup of tea. Yeah, I was about to say because with that being like the second question, for those people out there who might want to figure this out sooner than later and aka not waste time, that's a good question to ask. Yeah, if you ask somebody what they're into and they say, we do nothing but anal fisting and that's not your thing. You can write them off or you can be like, fantastic, we've found our tribe.
We've found our anal fisting tribe we can do a circle circle of anal fisting all right so we're in a club you walk up to me and hey how's it going i mean wow that's what i'm saying like i've got the best fucking pickup lines hey how you going what's a crack come here often come here often fucking hell With hell. Yeah, I see now why. With any luck I do. I see now why. Oh, man, that's terrible. I see now why apparently I'm the only single guy in this room. You walk up to somebody and how do you start the conversation then? How do you create small talk? But this is about small talk.
This isn't about starting a conversation. Okay, fine. This is about small talk. When you started the conversation. So you're asking people about their lifestyle journey. Yeah, I yeah i mean obviously it not obviously but it generally starts a little further afield than you know what you're into i mean i always like to start with a compliment of some kind oh yeah that's always a nice one what about if you don't have anything complimentary to say then what are you talking to them for exactly my point yeah run away yeah i mean you Yeah.
I mean, you're doing generally fun, a compliment for most people. Yeah. No, I was actually digging for the answer that you gave. All right. Here's a fun compliment that happened in Miami. It wasn't directed at me. It was directed at Mallory. And it was, you know what I love about you? I love the way that you just dance like nobody's paying attention to you at all. Cool.
And she was like, wait, is that a compliment like a fucking weirdo so you're saying like is that a backhand here's the rule and compliments especially ones you're not sure of as as somebody take it as a compliment always take it as a compliment hell yeah because you can take anything you like as a negative if you want like oh my god as an God, as an example, oh, my God, you look like you've lost weight. Yeah. What's the response to that if you're on the negative side? Oh, thanks. Call me fat. Exactly. But that's not what the intent is. The intent is to say you look good. Okay.
Humans are just not good at giving compliments in general. I understand what you're saying about, you know, how do you get into the lifestyle, your origin story, but a lot of people use that. So would you try to deviate ever so slightly from that to stand out?
So some of the things that I wrote down was like what drew you to the lifestyle or what kind of nights, swing of the club nights do you like, what's your favourite theme night, something like that that's a little bit similar to what you're saying but steps aside a little bit from the standard like, oh, how long have you been in the lifestyle for, you know, your lifestyle origin story. You can also ask them what is the funniest lifestyle story they have. Yeah, that's a good one. What's the best? What's the worst? Because the worst typically aligns with the funniest.
Typically there are some horror stories out there as well. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. So that being the case, maybe stay away from the worst. Just go with the best. What's the best story? I approach it with curiosity, but flirting with curiosity because to your point, you can start learning a little bit about their play style. So a couple of other things I wrote down is what's been your favourite play experience so far?
Yeah, the way you word these though are all so cerebral like you're at a club meeting people you know it's not like what's your favorite uh experience in the lifestyle thus far it's just what has been your best experience yeah have you have you had fun what do you what do you do that's fun for you what do you enjoy yep now i want to talk to you about it's not an it's not an inquisition it's a conversation yeah okay so one of my points i asked I don. Ah. Hey, occasionally. Excuse me. Anyway, so how would you make that sexy?
Wanting to find out somebody's, like, are they into sexual, sensual, raunchy vibes? How do you phrase that? How do you ask them about that without it being creepy or clinical? What sort of play experience are you into? Do you enjoy laughing while you play? Do you enjoy... That seems a bit clinical, doesn't it? Hello, good sir. What kind of play experiences are you into? The way you've posed that question helps me formulate the answer, unfortunately. So for me, this is conversational.
So you're not there to ask questions you're there to chat and the chat may include a question like what are you into yeah but not what are you into probably more like do you like this type of play do you like that type yeah you know you can itemize down to things that you might be interested as well do you you know the theme night might give something away as well. Like we went to a – the last event we went to was a Sexperts night which is supposed to be for people who've been in the lifestyle for some time. Yeah. Right?
So you can immediately possibly skip some of the smaller lower end stuff and just work your way up into some higher end stuff if that's what you're interested in.
Now speaking of creepy one of the really easy questions that you could ask is you know have you been to this club before do you come here often um you know do you live nearby now some people might find that creepy because you're trying to like where they live might make them feel a little bit uneasy for some people but i think that's also another it's a good lead into a conversation because that can either go two ways yeah this is our favorite home club we come here all the time and then you can take cues off of that and ask questions about that or no this is our first time at this club because we're traveling but we really like our home club is xyz and you can take cues from that that's just an easy little segue to get into my question to you is do you modify your small talk behavior from a loud swingers club solo night where it's like everything's jam-packed into four hours between then a three four five day event do you modify your small talk behavior so i don't but this is a very big difference between you and i is that i don.
I get the information that I need as quickly as I would on a short night to see whether I'm interested in somebody, right? So you can move on. And then the rest is extension to that. Well, yes, there's two reasons to that.
The first one is, again, dissimilarly between you and I, I'd be happy to play with somebody on the first night, in the first few hours, because there's no difference to me being at that event being than being at a one night event at a club right so that's a big difference between you and i is that you when you go to longer events you then take longer to get to that point whereas for me it's i don't see the difference up front so that's one thing so so no i don't really change it a lot at all because i think it's important to know fairly quickly whether those people are of interest to you or not or i mean more importantly they gel with you on a moral moral basis which is the biggest one for me in terms of what i find interesting about people is that they're they're aligned at least morally to what i'm aligned to yeah so i think to wrap up the small talk thing i think take cues up the small talk thing, I think take cues from the club itself, the environment, possibly the theme.
Those are some of the three quickest and easiest ways to engage with somebody. Next, take your cues from their lifestyle journey. You know, how long have you been in the lifestyle for? Don't be scared to ask them about what they're wearing as well. Like, you know, if you pay the compliment on the lingerie, ask them where it's from. Oh, red really suits you.
if you pay the compliment on the lingerie ask them where it's from ask you know that that's oh red red really suits you do you wear red often super fucking clinical oh fuck you it is not i'd be like okay fine i'd be like hey babe like your boobs look amazing in that red dress red really fucking suits you you look super sexy in it do you wear a lot of red now we're into creepy damn it well hey babe nice red your boobs look amazing red I just got you look really you look really really sexy in red and then I would probably normally at this point I would probably talk to the partner as well and I bring them into the conversation we've learned from this question is that we're no good at small talk.
That's not true. Theme, club, experience, journey. Yeah, environment. Environment. Take those cues and then run with that.
And nervous energy as well because if you walk up to them and they become jittery, then it's probably likely that they're newer to this than older yeah you know if they just and and the other thing which is critical is understanding their relationship as quickly as possible and that's because if their relationship sucks or you can identify quickly in that small short period that that they've had you know had a fight before they came or not then the question is do you need this drama in your life well it's also then to your point the second section of the second part of this is then just really quickly qualifying their journey because i think again if we go back to some of our first play experiences would we have played with that couple that were only into him never playing and her only playing would we have played with them if we have known that up front probably not but they didn't know that either at the time so i think those are some of the examples where you can make those decisions of like okay does our play style is it going to match theirs or not and then quickly either make the decision and maybe it doesn't match and then you decide well well you know what this is a really great conversation they seem like nice people i'm going to carry it carry on carry on with it that's great continue to do that if you're wanting to play, that is a good time for you to start thinking about an exit strategy and then going and finding someone else to talk to.
Yeah. Let's stop on the small talk. Okay. Let's small talk. Okay. Let's move on. You're making it creepy again. Yeah. Capdug. Are you excited to be going back i am yes also somewhat terrified why so last time i was unsold on carp dark right i wasn't i didn't know whether i loved it or hated it and okay for people who haven't listened to us before daryl is not necessarily the resort kind of guy i'm definitely not the result and so going into carp dark we didn't know whether it was going to be very much a similar feeling as the resort. It isn't. It is not. Which is actually a good thing.
So to give people the background on that. But the reason that I'm not sure whether I love it or hate it is nothing to do with the resort part of it. It's because it's such an intense event and both visually, orally and sexually stimulating all at once. Yeah. So I'm not sure whether that excites me or whether I find it too apocalyptic. I'm fucking excited. Or post-apocalyptic, I should say. Yeah, but we go into events like this with different views as well.
Well, I have my expectations very often and with with all things in life yes but yeah but your expectations are high on the fact that it'll be a party event no i already know a couple that i'd actually like to fuck okay okay so there's that yeah okay if the if the opportunity presents itself presents itself i mean this is one of those if you this is, again, the difference between you and I. You're like, if the opposite – if they come over and they're talking to me and I'm in the mood right then, I'll say, hey, guys, you know. No, maybe they don't want to fuck me, babe.
I can't – how do you find that out? Awesome. Exactly. So you can do that in fucking three seconds. Hi, you know me. We know each other. Yeah. What a fuck. Would you like to play? Yeah. Yeah. But this is, again, difference. I am very excited. I'm looking forward to being naked. You know what? I'm going to run through the things I'm looking forward to and then you can do the same. I'm very much looking forward to being naked, being naked in the sun. I cannot fucking wait for it. I'm very excited because I'm feeling super excited because I'm very confident in how I look at the moment.
I've been going to PT twice a week, working, you know, and trying to do the right thing. So I'm confident in how I look, right? So I feel good about myself. So I'm super excited to be naked. I'm super excited to be around other naked people. And if there's any kind of similar bodies to what I saw in Miami, I'm very excited to actually be able to perv on people. That's nice. On naked bodies where I'm not being a creeper. So that's something I'm really looking forward to. And, yeah, I'm looking forward to dancing naked, swimming naked, partying naked. I'm really excited for all of that.
And I'm also excited to see all the sex and the fucking again okay so what's what's on your so all of that is all very um well not very but all of that is kind of non-sexual in nature you mean me sitting around watching people fuck each other in massive groups is non-sexual i mean sorry non-sexual involved this is what happens you're desensitized to all of this you're like yeah that's kind of boring okay no i'm not desensitized to it at all i find it highly highly interesting and highly erotic and this is part of the part of the potential concern for me is that i will find myself likely aroused the entire time we're there right and well whip it out we can go back and have a look whether or not it's as big as this king dildo thing.
King cock. So, yeah, I'm not sure. I would bring it with me, but it would overweight my luggage. Yeah, okay. Yeah, so this is actually both an excitement and a concern for me, is the differential between us with regard to that. Why? You think you're going to be so horny that you're going to be unable to control yourself? No, of course I'll never be unable to control myself, but I may become frustrated with just the lack of sex. Oh, you know what? I actually experienced somebody a little while ago throwing a full-on tantrum about not having sex at about midnight. Yeah, I'm not that person.
Oh, it was just so off-putting and um unattractive yeah fuck it was unattractive anyway sorry of course it's unattractive but that's not that's not my concern yeah that's i'm not gonna i'm not gonna do that you're concerned you're gonna get frustrated with me for not having sex no i'm gonna get i'm gonna get i think there's gonna be plenty of opportunities for us to potentially be involved in sexually exciting environments or sexual intercourse-y environments or play environments. There's a better way to say that, I'm sure. No, there is, absolutely.
But it wouldn't be a podcast if I didn't fuck it up.
So the interest is – the thing for me is that I always – I find myself always being the leader into these environments and i'm concerned that i will that i will potentially either annoy you by asking to be involved in asking us to be involved in some of these things or become frustrated because i'm don't feel comfortable in in asking you as often as i'd like to um yes i want to see all the naked fucking that's going to be you've covered that well i'm not clothes fucking because well no no naked fucking okay i'm excited to see all of all of that i am excited to revisit the nighttime club the one that we had been rejected twice yeah i'm excited to go back to that because we we were not particularly phased with it and i just don't know whether that was our mindset at that point because we were like fuck this club um and so i'm excited to kind of go back and and experience that because most of the sex we saw was daytime sex yeah is that yeah but that we weren't there late enough i think we're there till 1am yes yeah they open at midnight they open at midnight we were there a one.
So yeah, we weren't there late enough. I think we were there till 1am. Yes. Yeah. They open at midnight. They open at midnight. We were there at 1. So, yeah, we weren't there late enough. Yeah. So, I want to see if the vibe changes. So, sex during the day and, like, visually watching people have sex during the day. And I want to see whether or not the nighttime sex changes in its style, in its… What do you mean? What do you think? People start poking it in each other's eye holes or something. Like, what's the fucking difference here? They're like, oh, my God, only a 10-person orgy.
That's just... For chumps. That's for chumps. Let's turn it up a notch. Let's turn it up to 11 at nighttime. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah, I'm excited to possibly have, yeah, like a little slutty summer.
Oh, I actually had a bracelet made for me, by the way, which I don't know where that is where that is i had a bracelet made i think it's in my you think i keep going off fucking tangents but it says like slutty sexy girl summer on it okay and it was made and i've given it in miami it's like sexy slutty girl summer i'm keen for that i'm keen to i'm keen to dance naked and be a little bit more like open and out there and waiting for people to approach me that is something that I'm going into this with that mindset of like I want to be dancing naked and I want people to come up and like flirt with me.
Okay. And then I want to then assess whether or not I want to fuck them or not. Okay. Well, I mean putting yourself out there also means putting yourself out there the other way around, I thought. Yeah, it does. I know what I'm not going to be doing. What?
I will not be going in the hot tub and i will certainly not be fucking or having anyone play my pussy in the hot tub no i learned my lesson last time sorry yeah i'm not gonna do also there won't be any unprotected sex this time around no definitely not so that's also some that's also a learning yeah should i pack my jizzled juice just in case? Absolutely. Okay, great. Yeah, so that's not going to be something that we're going to be doing this time at all. So what are the other things you want to be doing? What are the other things? Because we didn't do a lot of things last time we were there.
Like we didn't go into the – I'm just throwing some examples. Like there's the foam area. We didn't do foam area. Because it was not working because of COVID, yeah. But there's a foam play area. There's other areas as well. Yeah, foam doesn't particularly, like playing in the foam does not particularly excite me, that concept. But again, I won't say no to it if I'm getting, if I'm there and I think this will be a lot of fun. And I say, hey, let's get this personal, let's go into the foam and let's play. But it's not something where I'm like gagging to go and play in the phone.
No, that's not what I mean. I mean it's something we haven't experienced before. So would we walk in there without – just for the understanding of the experience because that's a – what do we call it? Implied consent. Implied consent area. So that's something that we – yeah, anyway.
Again, I want to assess my feelings on the day and who's in there like i'd want to kind of watch a little bit and see who's in there first if i'm honest i understand what you're saying but the three people you see go in may not be any representative to the people who are in there that's what i'm saying i'm not saying that you should put yourself in a position where you don't feel comfortable at all because that's not real. But I just don't think that you can ever likely feel comfortable in an environment like that. Bay of the Pigs? Bay of the Pigs, a better caution. I don't know.
It feels like Bay of the Crackling to me. The Pigs, which actually sounds a lot more appealing. Crackling. I'd like like to watch it again would i like to participate probably not only because i don't really want 20 men fucking jizzing all over my hair and body like it's not my okay it's not my thing maybe you can go and participate in a jerk circle no i'm not interested in being in a jerk circle thank you very much oh okay would you be on the inside with another girl?
Like if there was a girl there who was like, I love, I absolutely love, I want all the cum all over my face, put it in my ear holes. Yeah, that would be interesting to me. I'm going to give you a blowjob in the surf. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, that would be of an interest. What about all the guys coming all over you as well? Are you happy with that? They know better than that. Okay. That's not their time. I would say the vast majority of the guys in that circle are hetero-focused individuals. Yeah. So they're not trying to get your cum on you? No. They're more interested in putting it on the woman.
I understand what you're saying, but there's going to be incidental cum. Yeah, no. I mean, incidental cum is incidental cum. I mean, that's a thing. That happens anywhere. Yeah. Just wash it off in the surf. Yes. Get a bit of sand, scrub it. Fuck yeah. Absolutely. My biggest problem about being in that bay would be being in the fucking salt water. Yeah. That's less enticing to me than being sprayed with some dudes gum.
I was going to say, I think if I can leave before I let you talk, one of the things that I'm going to be very highly focused on is staying healthy so i i do want to play and i i would say i want to play at least two to three times with other people i don't have a like i don't have a desire to go i want a 10 person orgy right i don't that's not what i'm putting out there again i'm not against it but it would have to be people that i find attractive and interesting that's all i don't know why you add that caveat that's always the caveat I'm not going in there with that as a goal, but what I would say is because I know that I want to play with you and possibly two to three other people or couples or what have you, two to three other times.
Yeah. That is going to require me to be quite healthy during this entire time. So I'm going to be extremely mindful of alcohol, sugar consumption, water consumption, like you just said, sand you just said sand and i'm like whatever foam fucking in the foam party could cause issues it would absolutely hot tub could cause issues so i'm going to be extraordinarily mindful of like remaining healthy because i refuse to be day two or day three and get like a uti or something going on and then i'm out of the game yeah that would that would be not ideal.
I'm also keen to see you get a head job, blow job, poolside. That would be fun. Okay. I mean, it's not really my thing, but yes. Well, I didn't care what the fuck you were saying. Okay, cool. All right, you, what are you excited about? I think just trying some new things again. What does that look like for you? So again, the phone party would be of interest to me just because I've never done anything like that before and this is an environment where we can be a little bit more less us, I suppose. A little bit more less us?
Yeah, a little bit less us because we generally are very – we're all about the brain when we're talking about playing with other people. You know, we want to know them as individuals and this is an environment where we can be a little less like that, which I think is kind of interesting. Less selective. Not less selective, no. Just less worried about what their intellectual stimulation is for us versus what their physical is or the environment is, right?
in these kinds of kinds of environment i certainly find people sexier just because of the fact that it could be a one-time thing yeah you have in these environments where it's a bit more sexually charged you have i don't want to say less standards because that doesn't sound right but you certainly have a more varied interest level yes in these in these environments if it's a sexually charged environment you're like environment, I think you would tend to play with somebody who you might not play with had you spent longer or an opportunity to look around.
One of the downsides of spending a lot of time with people is sometimes you figure out you don't like them. No, I'm just saying physically as well.
So if you were to spend two hours looking around a room and saying, yeah, I would fuck that person that person i think in a sexually charged environment say there was three people in that first scenario in a sexually charged environment like the foam foam pit i think you would probably look around and find maybe 20 people that you would fuck i think you have a misunderstanding misrepresentation of my interest in in having sex with people from what you've just said okay um so so it's I have a very broad standard for people. Yep.
Varying depending on not only their body, their intellectuals, the whole lot of things. You don't have like a, I go for this hair colour, this eye colour, this size, this height. My view on women and men with you as well is very broad.
i would argue that your view on men with me is actually more limited yes it is but that's because i'm trying to meet your standards not mine i don't know i reckon because your fantasy is more about anyway i'm kind of deviating it's it's your i'm trying to meet your standard okay which i've not managed to do yet so that's one thing trying something different trying different things. Do you want to go to any of the BDSM clubs there or go to any of that stuff there or no interest? BDM's not a big thing for me, BDSM, because I'm not a dom and I'm not a sub.
It just depends on my mood, whether I'm interested in being either of those, and that may change during a play session as well so so i'm not a good fit for that um but i'm always willing to go along if you because i know you have some interest in that i'd be more than happy to go along with you okay what else or the other option of course is that we've got friends there with us that we could that you could go with somebody else who's got more interest than me which i'd also find quite exciting what else What else are you excited about?
Yeah, I mean, of course, just the hanging out, the rampant sex, the fun that comes along with that, the laughs. This year, much less interested in drinks than possibly I have been in the past. So just again, because I don't want to walk away from this sunburned unhappy and, yeah, not feeling good. So anyway, that's going back to the negative. But on the positives, the Bay of the Pigs, I'd be interested in playing on the beach with you there just to see what that feels like to be surrounded, to have you surrounded more interesting to me than me being surrounded. Yeah, I think just new things.
Okay. I'd be interested in you taking a guy back to your room without me yeah just because that's something we haven't done before okay scenario we go to one of the babylon pool parties which is the fucking crazy sex by the pool i gotcha i remember i walk in and i'm like in the moving meat, hey, Daryl, can you get me a drink? And then you get me a drink, turn around, and then I'm fucking 15 people on a bed. Do you, A, cheer me on from the sidelines and sit there and drink or do you, B, kamikaze, jump in and – Cheer you on from the sidelines. Okay.
And see you – watch you fuck as many people as you feel appropriate to. And then immediately tell me go to the bathroom and go have a shower and then take some probiotics and drink some water. Yep. Great. Cool. Yeah. But now you've – see, now the problem is you put that in my head. Now I'm like, yeah, that sounds good. So overall you're excited? Yeah. Absolutely I'm excited.
I think it's – so the only reason I say I'm i have any concerns is just is just i don't want to get i don't want to fuck things up i don't want to fuck up your holiday either not mine okay so i've got a question for the listeners then if you haven't been to cup doug before but you know what it is what would be on your list of what would be your bucket list items yeah what should kate do what should kate do drop us email. Email at wanderlosswingers.com. So, how to be a better swinger. Quickie tips for lifestyle success. I would say small talk, necessary, needed, and easy to do generally.
I get the perception that when you come into this, you're normally talking to people about children jobs homes when you're not when you're not in the lifestyle coming to the lifestyle throw that shit out of the yeah i mean children children and stuff may come up in conversation but that's further down the track that's after you've gotten to know these people and likely played with them or figured out how you want to fit into their life or how they fit into yours so yep these are not things for the initial conversation initial conversations initial conversations is a little more raunchy about what they're interested in, you know, what they like, what they enjoy, what they want.
In a mystery box, I have another one for our quickie tips for success. I wrote this down. I think you're going to love it. Is mystery box energy a metaphor for the lifestyle? Stay curious and stay open. Could be.
So should people maybe stay curious and buy something for them and their spouse try something new try a new sex toy try a new fantasy try something new in the lifestyle yes in your own bedroom absolutely without a doubt and how what tips would you give to people to bring that up with their partner maybe uh i mean i think if you're if you're already in this lifestyle then then uh the best way to it up is to bring it up, just to have a conversation about it or to buy something that's within your budget and reasonably priced and knowing that it may not be of their interest and you can get rid of it if that's the case.
And don't push them to do it if it's not of their interest, yeah. Not at all. Or find alternates. So my interest here with you is actually you playing with multiple guys without protection, right? That's what my overarching interest is. I'm going to take. I have Mr. Lode Classic and Mr. Gizzle Juice. This is not feasible. This is not feasible for your sexual health or your potential long-term health. So what I've done is tried to find something that will work for me and work for you. And the third and final thing for tips for success I would leave people with is do what we just did.
If you're about to attend a club, a night, a resort, an event, talk about what you're excited about and talk about what you're nervous about and share that with your partner for a couple of reasons. One, because they can be a wingman, but then two, because they're then very well aware of maybe some of the nervous energy that you might be taking into that event. Yeah. And also recognize nervous energy is good. Yeah. And also, Darryl, get your cock out so we can measure it. No? No. God damn it. Hey, we got two new reviews. Yeah. That never happens. Okay.
So much so that I'm actually going to give him a shout out on the podcast because I was so excited to see we actually had two new fucking podcast reviews. Sweet. Go for it. Okay, so this is Adam and he's from the United States and he said, just found this podcast. I just found this podcast and found it so very interesting. Good to hear y'all's perspective and growing together. Very American. Y'all. Thanks Adam, you're an absolute gem and he did that on order. I think you're that's actually too big to say very American. That's just one part. That's just some parts of America. Y'all.
Y'all is not a total thing. Adam wrote that on Audible, which I didn't even realise our podcast is published there, so hey-ho, apparently it is. Thanks, Adam. Cheers, Guy. And what have we got here? Oh, good fun Aussies. Guess where they're from? New Zealand.
They're fromralia they wrote this on apple podcast they said thank you i'm amazed as to what information you are giving the community as we have just started in the swinging lifestyle and i'm learning so much to help me and my wife for in the future thank you so much for what you're doing awesome so that is from good fun aussies cheers guys really appreciate your leaving us review thank they sound like fun. They do sound like fun. And again, we never get reviews, so I was super stoked to actually see. That's in the last month.
I'm going to start starting email addresses and just giving you reviews. No, this is on the actual podcast. Yeah, no, no, I can do that as well. Oh, man, that's like two reviews in the last month. Add a new email address to start a new account. It's very exciting. Yeah. It is. It's cool. Thank you. All right. So we're going to wrap it up. I was going to say check social media to see what's in Daryl's box, but as we mentioned earlier, that's just not going to happen because of the sheer volume of it. Let me just put it down for you again. There we go.
So I suppose the interesting thing here is that we should know is that since for the last 20 minutes, Kate's been talking with it all on her hand like it's some sort of talking stick. It's also a telescope because you can see straight through it because it's got the hole for the cum to come out of. Not a telescope, just so you know. Yeah. Are you dreaming again of going to Carp Dog? Send us an email, email at wandalaswingers.com. I'm keen to hear what trouble you would get into if you were going and share your tips on small talk with us because we'll happily share them on social media.
But otherwise, thank you so much for listening, guys. Really appreciate you. Thank you. Have a great day. Give me a big, big outro. Thank you. You have a great day. Yeah, I guess Kate just spins and catches a massive dildo. This is Daryl signing off, getting ready to be naked in southern France. Yes. Now, we'll see you guys next time. Really appreciate you listening to us. And stay healthy, stay happy, and stay curious. Bye, guys. See you.
