Want to send us a message? Finding the right fit in the swinging lifestyle can be challenging. Swinging with others involves compatibility, attraction, confidence and preferences. It is very much like dating but waaaaay more complicated. You may have found that the swinging lifestyle can get very challenging to coordinate all four interests at the same time and we hope to provide a bit of insight on the right fit . SHOW NOTES:Compatibility TurtleBase JumperTrue FoursomeIntellectConfidencePhysicalAttractivenessKissing 4 DummiesWomen Are GatekeepersPreferences Stereotypes Support the showWant More?👀 Watch on YouTube: YouTube ShowFull video versions and interactive live episodes!Bonus episodes, exclusive content, and 🌶️Extras: https://www.patreon.com/SwingerUniversity 🛳️🎉Looking for lifestyle events in your area? T4P is the go-to directory for clubs, parties, and resort events. Browse now at Ticket4Play.com Custom SU T-shirts and gear: Our Amazon StoreSwingerLinks.com - live schedule, special offers*, and our 🌶️links!Our Website - Leave us a message, articles, and sexy products3 Ways to get your question on our show:RECORD it on our website at: https://swingeruniversity.com/contact/EMAIL a recorded voice note to: [email protected]: (916) 538-0482 and leave a voicemail.* We get a commission if you decide to purchase through our links, at no cost to you.
Transcript
We have to talk about something we've been genuinely excited about for months, and our patrons actually got a preview of this already. Jamaica! Yes, we are going back, and actually, we have a great offer for you guys. Yeah, it's Swingcation. It's October 11th through the 18th at Hedonism 2. And if you don't know what Swingcation is, it's pretty easy. Swinger plus kink plus vacation. It's a hosted group with real structure, workshops, lectures, real conversations with experts who are passionate about bringing and bridging that gap between the swinger world and the kink world.
And we're not just going as attendees. we're going as featured presenters, which is exciting. We'll be leading sessions. So if you come, we actually get to hang out with you. Which brings up something we should mention. When you use our code, yes, we got a code, you're not just getting a discount, you're getting the signature swing experience, which means $100 off per person, up to $200 per room, but it also means that we make time for you. An exclusive breakfast, lunch, cocktail hour, or one-hour and one time with us directly, plus more surprise benefits.
Here's something that's really unique. You could actually contribute by hosting a discussion or running a Skillshare. I know it's scary, but if you have something that you want to contribute, that's a big part of why this event is so special. Everyone there has something to bring to the table. All right, details. If you book before April 25th, you save $400. Plus, they gave us that special code that gets you an additional $200, and the special code is SWINGERU-VIP. So book through TicketForPlay.com forward slash Swinkie. That's T-I-C-K-E-T, the number four, play.com forward slash S-W-I-N-K-Y.
And use our code at checkout. And you guys, if you have any questions about the event, the resort, or what to expect, just reach out. I mean, we're here for you. We're happy to help. So once again, ticketforplay.com forward slash Swinky, the code SwingerU-VIP. We really want to see you there. You're listening to Swinger University, with Ed and Phoebe. Group projects were never this much fun. Here are your hosts, Ed and Phoebe.
Today, we're talking about finding the right fit it's kind of like the whole cinderella story of the shoe either fits or it doesn't fit especially when you start talking about swinging with couples married couples now if you're looking for singles much easier and we'll get into a lot of details about fours and threes and how this whole mix of things fits together but let's talk about finding the right fit and maybe let's start with some pacing stuff pacing pacing so some couples are kind of like turtles oh yeah takes a long time to get comfortable with the other couple a lot of conversation, a lot of interactions here and there around at different events and you think there's something and you're not sure it's like dating it's like trying to find a partner for some couples yes it's gotta be just right not too warm not too cold not too hard not too soft just right goldilocks problem yeah it could be a little frustrating yeah and honestly we don't have the patience for that many dates to go do they fit well maybe if we turn them a little bit and kind of fit them in that way maybe they'll fit right but in the beginning too it's kind of hard because you you don't really know what you like what you don't like how you and your partner partner interact and how they're going to respond so there tends to be more communication in the beginning without any assumptions at least for us and so you're kind of afraid to make a move or you make a move thinking oh it'll all work out because you don't know what you don't know so you end up making the best decision that you can and sometimes it's not always the best decision well and we always chalk that up to we tried it we didn't like it and we usually give a couple tries to make sure that it wasn't just an off night or a weird situation or right they were tired had a hard week right but i remember back when i was dating and i usually knew by the third date whether it was going to work out or not and i think with swinging i pretty much figure out by the second date yeah first date could be a little cold a little off second date if it's off again it's like yeah next yep check please sometimes it's the environment too where it just doesn't foster good or ease of conversation it's too loud or there's too many families around in earshot so you can't really have a nice flow a nice connection so you got to be careful with the spot that you pick for your date and our biggest issue has been on dates with couples where does the conversation go if the conversation is all about work kids pets pets then yeah it's not sexy no i'm not going to get the vibe from you we're not not gonna start getting all turned on because you're talking about spot spot and how horrible your children are it's just not gonna happen right and you're certainly you're throwing up all the wrong flags on that play so and that's an opportunity to turn the conversation and if you try to turn it and direct the conversation several times but they keep dropping the ball you serve the ball over and it drops on the other side it might be an indicator it's not a good fit we'll just call that crash and burn keep pulling the nose up and it keeps steering down and i i do want to say it may not be a good fit for right now maybe they're not on the same page maybe they're too new but don't discount them for a potential play partner in the future sure because people change over time absolutely they get more comfortable yes we were awkward as hell the first oh yeah two years i know we tried so hard not to be but it was if we were dated us six years ago, seven years ago, oh, yeah, I'm sure we would have turned ourselves down.
Oh, yeah, no, I'd pretty much still want you. I would have definitely wanted you. See, that doesn't work. I'd be like, yeah, she's a little awkward, but damn.
You can't't talk but i'm not really looking for a lot of conversation but that's the thing couples change over time their dynamic changes over time their dating style changes over time they get more comfortable comfort we'll get into this breeds confidence yep getting ahead so if you're not gonna be a turtle with your approach you could be a base jumper all those adrenaline junkies straight in both feet yep take the suit off jump straight in and those tend to be the people in the service professions like firemen nurses doctors yep military yep they're all like bam head, head first, all in.
It's the adrenaline. Yeah, we've met a lot of people in those careers that tend towards the more blood pumping. Instant gratification.
Well, and they've got this, they have less fear of the the unknown they've got this kind of like i'm always ready yeah kind of a mentality true that's a good point so they go in they're like no i've committed to doing this i'm going in yeah follow me yep and and that works and it works well for them and i was going to say that they'll jump in with both feet and they figure out whether they have compatibility afterwards so it's kind of like damn the torpedoes full speed ahead and it may work out it may not but they're going to give it not a lot of thought before they just barrel in right so our approach was very thought out planned as much as we could it was planned spontaneity and quite the opposite of the base jumper but both approaches have good communication when i say we had really good communication up front with a turtle approach and we've heard stories and have met good friends that have had great communication being a base jumper right they go head on they find that it didn't work some mistakes were made but because of the longevity and their relationship and the commitment and the communication they were able to make that repair right express their feelings adjust the course and continue on right so you know it's the course correction that in the heat of whatever just you know figure it out yep keep moving one One of the biggest issues that we've had being a couple trying to find another couple is bum the four-way connection the contrast is a three-way and a lot of couples start off with we're gonna find a unicorn right We both get to play with her and she's an accessory in the bedroom yeah that's great or he or he yeah i i the stunt cock yeah it's kind of 50 50 i think but we never chose to do that it was no for us for me that was very uncomfortable you were nervous about the single girl yeah and you didn't want another guy right which kind of ruled out the whole threesome thing for us i i did want another guy but i what i did but i didn't want it in the same room because it felt weird it felt like i couldn't it was weird if i was in a separate room it'd feel like cheating but if i was in the same room i i also felt like cheating it was very to me.
My brain couldn't separate or allow myself to relax. Well, you had two modes. You had the whole, I'm in dating mode, which means if you're single and you have a cock, you're in trouble. Because if she finds you, she will tear you apart. She's going to throw you in the back of a truck and just have her way with you now i just do that to you every day i know i know but when i'm in a relationship i am like, never cheated, trustworthy, dedicated, just rock solid. The best companion ever. Oh, yeah. To, it's that Roman Catholic upbringing. Right. Committed to the end.
That and my astrological sign of being a bull. Okay, can we talk about October for a second? Oh my God, yeah. I've been waiting for this. We were invited to be guest speakers for two engagements on a six-star crystal cruise ship with 310 lifestyle couples.
it sails from Montreal to Boston during the peak foliage season I'm super excited and honestly I'm really nervous yeah it's kind of a version of like a swinger TED talk that we're gonna have to do oh my god i know and more importantly if you know the brand it's llv luxury lifestyle vacations you may have seen them and they're sexy playmakers with their fun red hats this ship the crystal symphony is classy butler service for every single room Michelin rated restaurants, full clothing optional sensual playrooms like everything theme nights and international dj so it's luxury and nudity oh man this is gonna be great the bottom line is we want you there with us it's 310 couples And like all their vacations, they book up fast.
They really do. They're. Bottom line is, we want you there with us. It's 310 couples, and like all their vacations, they book up fast. They really do. Their vacations are extremely popular. So please come with us. And in order to find it, all you have to do is go to rswingerlinks.com and look for the LLV Sensual Voyage.
We hope you'll join us ah yes yes so threesomes work out for a lot of people because it's a triangle and it's much easier to find balance with a triangle than it is with four right anybody who's ever set up a tripod versus a chair or a table how many people have been to a coffee shop and had the table go and wiggle on you right you got to fold up the napkin shove it under the table leg why because it's not stable it's hard to find four legs that are the same. Three legs, always balanced, always works out. Got a lot less things to compare and figure out.
The true foursome, two couples getting together, compatibility all around.
around and and it's more than just husbands and wives swapping and being comfortable with the opposite accountability all around and and it's more than just husbands and wives swapping and being comfortable with the opposite spouse a lot of times the wives have to be comfortable with each other too because they're like you're gonna fuck my husband absolutely i i gotta be on the same wavelength with you or trust you to a certain degree that you're not just gonna drag him off to another room even though we said that's not allowed now look don't get all personal here that has happened that has happened it's completely awkward what did she just do did we were we not clear yeah and it's like no no no i want to go back don't come with me and uh yeah it's hard oh my god so it's hard to find that that balance between all four people yeah classic sexual compatibility the guy's a dud not a stud it's just not sexy they're they're not giving off the right vibe we've had that a couple times we've got on a date with a couple she is hot super sexy we're both like oh yeah we do her and the guy's like crickets this guy reminds me of my uncle yeah and not in a good way yeah and you know sexy it's that it's mostly not the physical it's the confidence and you know your personality you're that je ne sais quoi that yes that chemistry where everybody talks about the chemistry that the the sparks that fly and that's that's not a simple formula that's a complex interaction of conversation and physical appearance and yep and smell and yeah look like all that i know exactly so sexual compatibility between all four people that's kind of hard to come by yes and then intellectual compatibility which we were starting to touch on you know you've got for me you've got to have a little bit of mental stimulation there you've got to be able to carry on a conversation be a little interesting maybe a little humorous right humor's humor is fun i i struggle with humor i'm i'm not the most well i don't know i do make people laugh.
I guess it's just some people. But I like some humor, as does everybody. You know, you want to be able to like engaging with that person, right? They have to be likable. They've got to make you laugh. They've got to engage in conversation.
and in terms of like intellectual compatibility it's if they don't even have the same subjects that you like to talk about not to get political but that's one direction it could be hobbies or interests or yeah it's you know they watch sports and you don't there's there's just nothing to talk it's no different than dating it's basically the same thing you all know what dating is like and if you haven't done it in 20 or 30 years it's gonna be a little difficult roll back the clock yep remember it was like the guy was super boring you couldn't carry on a conversation that's the intellectual stimulation that's that incompatibility right and then attractiveness to all you know it that's difficult also but the more interesting or intellectually stimulating that you are, the more attractive you become.
So that's why I don't put a lot of weight on first impressions and this whole outward package. Or the first impression from across the room. Exactly. That lust at first sight. Yes. Yeah.
I mean mean because you could be america's top model and you know be drop dead gorgeous and open up your mouth and you sound like humperdue hi humperdue from what's that show preacher preacher oh my god It bad it's awesome so so yeah it's just like dating it's exactly like dating but it's more complicated because it's not one plus one it's two plus two sometimes means equals three or sometimes it equals two actually exponential zero yes that's hard it's pretty hard we talked about intellectual compatibility in a foursome so we kind of addressed that as well and we also started to talk about confidence and how, you know, that can be really sexy.
And, you know, somebody who isn't necessarily physically attractive, in other words, classically beautiful, like, stereotypically model-esque right underwear model right man like we can't all be calvin klein models you are or victoria's secret models i am but that's not everything no absolutely not and we found people who didn't fit that cookie cutter vogue definition cosmopolitan definition of sexy to be very sexy why because they carried themselves the way that they talk the way that they engage with you the eye contact the nasty things that they said in just the right way i know and i can't tell you how many times ed and i have gotten our vehicle after a party or an event and we go you know i would totally fuck him or her be because they were incredibly sexy like i wouldn't it you know who's going to be there you see their profile picture right of course we know how terrible you know a what do you call them it's non-dem it's not a 3d it's not it's not a real thing it's not a real thing yeah so even if you're a professional photographer your photo is just going to be terrible but you see them in real real life across the room and you're like and then you approach them and you have this great amazing conversation you're like I'll see you next time.
terrible but you see him in real real life across the room and you're like hmm and then you approach him and you have this great amazing conversation you're like wow i really want to fuck them right we've had a number of couples that fell into that category where it was like yeah they're they're okay their pictures are all right let's go chat with them and that's where that strategy came in. Go talk to three couples at every party. Right? And you're like, okay, let's go talk to them. And then surprise. Just like a jack-in-the-box surprise. Hot people. Oh, yeah. Hot people. Hot, fun people.
And I think that's the other thing.
If they're fun, if you're laughing, if you're laughing if you're having a good time if the conversation is just flowing you know you you finish each other's sentences so to speak it's just fun i know and that's what we're in it for mm-hmm we're in it for the fun oh yeah if it was purely for orgasms if it was just that then we just find the person that had the exact tempo and size and technique right but that's pretty hard to find yeah yeah especially just by looking at a profile or talking to somebody right you gotta you have to take it for a test drive to find out if they're good there right but this this kind of we've said this before conversation is foreplay And, you know, a lot of it comes down to that whole leading up to the bedroom thing you know you start tickling the right spots in people's erogenous zones their brain and you can get them to follow you back to your room it actually just lassos them ties them up and drags them down the hall i have a wagon for that now oh makes it much easier it's not as hard on my back I'll see you next time.
I have a wagon for that now. Oh. Makes it much easier. Oh. It's not as hard on my back. Oh. So. Physical attraction, obviously, is a thing. You obviously may have a type or a preference or a bucket list. You know, maybe you've never had sex with, you know, someone of a different color. You know, someone who's Asian, someone who's tall, someone who's short. You name it. If you haven't had it, you may want it potentially on your bucket list. Yeah. And that's fun. I mean, it's fun to have a goal. It's the variety, right? It's something different. I've never tried that before. Right.
I want to try that. Yeah. Someone with thin lips. Someone with large, voluptuous lips. Someone with big hair. Someone with long hair. Short hair. Short hair. Get your fingers in. Yeah. Maybe your husband has a bald head and you really want to have sex with someone like Fabio where you can, like, throw your hands in his hair and just grab it. Right? Pulling down.
Right down between your legs just just grab a handful and just make him eat it right i mean there's so many different things to to love and have preferences and you can break you can pretty much make anything oh yeah hot and sexy and list. And everybody's got their list. Yep. It's a little different person to person. But we're always adding things to our list because we're like, oh, my God, we've never tried that. All right. I'm game. I'm going to write that down. I haven't tried that yet. yeah and and honestly, not until a few months ago did I actually feel like I had a list.
And that was because of a certain couple that we felt really comfortable playing with. And they would delicately, you know, always ask, so, you know, what's on your list? Or is there anything that we can add to your list? Then they just started throwing out ideas and were like, oh, my God. Oh, that sounds fun. And I was like, okay, I like that idea. Let's try that.
And then it became really fun and exciting because it was something that we could all experiment with and experimentation is fun and we're all about sex is fun so let's experiment i've never done that let's all do this together that would be amazing absolutely and then a small list formed probably three items, maybe five. But it wasn't a large list for me. A dozen or two. You know, the list varies depending on, you know. I just open anything. I try not to structure myself too much. I mean, you don't want to limit yourself. No. I mean, bring it on. Bring it all.
all oh my goodness attractiveness we touched on that external versus internal a little bit right it's that classically attractive person versus the internally attractive person the person who's got the great personality engaging in conversation attractiveness varies and so finding a good fit is kind of going to depend I think it's a balance you can't be outwardly attractive and unattractive on the inside it just doesn't work and the opposite is true too you could be the greatest personality in the world but you know what there's a limit on the outside in terms of attractiveness for you yeah for you And For you.
And it varies from person to person. And everybody's kind of got this sliding scale of attractiveness. Right. And I was going to say, too, to go along with that, that confidence helps to factor in with that internal and external confidence. Because you could be a really attractive person, but not confident, physically attractive. Right. And that is a turnoff, just like someone who's maybe not externally attractive, but they've got a lot of confidence and they're funny and entertaining.
So it's this it's this really interesting chemistry of how it all fits together exactly i hate this topic oh the next one yeah it's it's horrible K-I-S-S-I-N-G I love kissing i know it's so much fun dummies 101 for kissing is needed yeah we've met some bad kissers i know i did not this was an issue. I didn't know that was a thing. Me neither. It really should get you a handicap plate or a special dispensation or something. Because it's kind of wrong to be a swinger and not be able to kiss. Like, how did you go from grade school through junior high?
Because some people started in grade school kissing into junior high with kissing and going to first base and second base. And then all through high school, making out in the back of of your car being married for 20 years being a swinger for 20 years and still not able to kiss at some point you'd think someone would tell you well but maybe not Here's why we sail on Virgin. It's adults only. No kids screaming at breakfast. No family buffet lines. Just champagne at noon. Late night pool parties and people who actually want to be there. The vibe? Think boutique hotel that happens to float.
Tattoo parlors, drag brunch, restaurants you'd actually pay for on land. Plus, when you're looking to connect with other couples who know how to have fun, let's just say Virgin attracts a very specific type of adventurous. No wonder Bread Cruiser's here. Just your people. I don't know. Unless they've just never kissed anyone else but that same person in high school. Maybe that's it. That's not possible. Especially in swinging.
10 swinging 10 000 hours to be an expert you'd think by then you'd be an expert at kissing but i guess if you've only been with one person maybe you don't know i was i'm baffled however i am we met a couple who had been together for a while it was their second or third marriage with each other before they found each other i mean maybe their second and they had been together for a long time and they had been in the lifestyle for a very long time and we were like this is terrible what the hell just happened i i actually felt violated it was that bad you were actually really traumatized i've had therapy to deal with it that's how bad it was oh my god i mean we're just not talking like awkward.
And so polite and so nice. It was horrible. So you got to know how bad it was if he's this. Okay, this is the best description that I can give you of it. Go into your kitchen.
Get a coffee mug or a mason jar and put your mouth on it make out with a mug or a mason jar oh my gosh and it rigid hard not moving no just whang right on your face and it didn't get better no like as the night progressed no you'd think okay here's my dance partner we're doing the two-step oops i stepped on his toes oh okay well now i get it oh oh i did it again oh but by the third time you start to kind of figure out the dance steps right and then you're like yeah now we're in lock and step no that never happened no uh no not not at all so she was she was definitely not following your lead and she was she's not some 18 year old girl who's lived in a convent her whole life.
She was a swinger. Like, way more experience than we had. That was our second year, first year in the lifestyle? Yeah, maybe. Yeah, second, third year. Yeah, relatively new. I've kissed a lot up until that point, you'd think and you'd be wrong so very wrong i know so so if you could tell kissing is a big thing for us we really like it it it sparks everything it's sensual it. It's fun. It gets all the juices going. Any sex therapist will tell you. You know, kissing starts everything. In fact, I recommend it. If you haven't had sex in your marriage for a really long time, start making out.
Like, time yourself. Chemical reactions start to happen in your body when you are making out with your partner. Right.
So, it gets everything started so i don't understand why i understand why it's a rule because it is intimate because it's very yes in your face and i get that and i get the people that have that that i i totally understand why that's a rule we can go into that later but if you can get past that um it's really amazing I know we should make out more I just love it oh my goodness all right so girls club girls club getting in with the woman first we have heard this so many times and we firmly believe it it was great advice and this is actually really solid marriage advice your Your wife is always right.
So if she's not into it, you're not going to get anywhere. If mama's not happy, nobody's happy. Right. Happy wife. Happy life. Happy life. Happy swinger wife.
Now we're in exactly so yeah let the ladies get familiar with each other talk to each other she's got to be engaged if the i mean the husbands could have all kinds of great you know harley hot rod whatever conversations where they get along with their favorite sports teams but if the wives don't get along or the husbands are more interested in the other wives that can kind of set things off in a really weird way so let the wives get into it be happy with the other couple everybody's got to be engaged in this conversation especially the wife yeah yeah you have to i always hug or greet the woman the other woman first whether it's a handshake or a hug or saying hello it to me it's a form of respect and um i i see her as the gatekeeper right so you know if i don't say hi to her first then that's horrible um that's just very disrespectful it's just you know she's a gatekeeper yeah yep all right here we go we're gonna venture down the dark alley here dark alley preferences and stereotypes right it's the elephant in the room i mean figuratively and size wise I'll see you next time.
stereotypes right it's the elephant in the room i mean figuratively and size wise cox you did say i knew how you're going with that there there's a lot of stereotypes and a lot of preferences for penis size and i think there's a lot of misconceptions and i think that there's a lot of stereotypes and a lot of preferences for penis size. And I think there's a lot of misconceptions and I think that there's a lot of preconceptions, if you will, about penis size. And, you know, people prefer things for different reasons. Yeah. Maybe they prefer it because it feels better.
Maybe they prefer it because they've never had it.
Maybe they prefer it because it feels better maybe they prefer it because they've never had it maybe prefer it because that's all they've ever known i've been now being in the lifestyle i know i'm extremely lucky to have had three dedicated partners that had that were very well endowed and I just thought that was normal spoiled I guess so yeah so being in the lifestyle I've encountered all kinds of variety and so it was a little it was not shocking in a bad way but it was it was definitely eye-opening i i had no idea because i mean look you go you watch porn and what kind of cocks do you see there like the biggest cocks ever right they get hired for their cocks so i just assumed that my partners were porn stars they just didn't make money in porn it's my retirement plan but i haven't gotten right so i'm like okay well you know i'm in that regard, but I kind of figured, I mean, now these guys in porn are a little longer, but the thickness thing was always there.
So I'm like, all right, hell, you know, but then in the lifestyle, you, you see that, that there's all kinds of variety and it feels feels different which is kind of fun yeah you've gotten to try some different try some strange and strange that doesn't sound right oh that's a thing it's not yours but it's it felt different not because of, it felt different, not because of size. It felt different by the way they used their equipment. Right. That whole motion in the ocean thing. Yeah. Hard, soft, or the sideways thing, or grabbing a leg, or doing this swirl thing.
And I'm like, oh, dang, that feels so good yeah right but it doesn't really matter what size cock you have at that point you could still have that technique and it would probably feel amazing sure i don't know so i guess we're saying is you might be surprised. Don't limit yourself to, you know, only one preference. Yeah. And you have your preference because of who knows what, right? Experience or that's the kind of porn that you watch. Or maybe it just really does something for you.
But, you know, sometimes you break out of that the variety is sometimes fun i feel like i rambled on with the whole cock thing did you get distracted thoughts of cocks running through your head i i did i was actually thinking about a lot of cock it was really nice yeah i know we should put that in there in this you know as an outtake definitely everybody's got their their preference or their stereotype or more specific they have a fetish or a desire to try a particular thing sometimes it's contrast sometimes it's the variety something different than what you normally have so there's the there's the black thing there's the the Asian thing.
Everybody's kind of got their personal fetish, if you will, that inspires them to try these different things. Yep. And it's different for everybody. I don't have one thing that drives me i have dozens so i don't have a preference i have a whole bunch of different preferences so um for me it's it's the variety like all of these choices they're all. I personally like women who are a little bit more voluptuous, curvy. Don't really have a thing for the super thin girls. But athletic girls, also very curvy, muscular.
Got a little bit more curve to them and of course i do have a range i have my preference that uh that i prefer right as do most people yeah and i don't i don't know i guess my preference is basically just sexy right i mean whatever sexy to you yeah it's that internal sexiness there needs to be some mental stimulation there there's obviously some physical um attributes but i'm not a You don't have a type i don't have a list i tend to gravitate towards men with dark hair but i wouldn't discount a you know a blonde or a black haired man or you know a red-headed guy.
I just don't run into them very often. Right. I just don't. Maybe because I just don't seek them out. But, yeah, I don't know. I'm not that picky. Now I am. I do gravitate to some bald guy bald-headed men especially if they look like vin diesel or the rock yeah if they're listening by the way you can contact us and reach out and phoebe would be more than happy to accommodate you i i actually am really fascinated by men that look like a tree aquaman yes yeah jason momoa jason momoa the rock i love the idea of just being able to climb all over them right because i do love being on.
And that would just be fun as fuck. Ride the crap out of that poor guy. Right? Just grab onto his pecs and just... Oh, yeah. She does that. Oh, my Lord. It's getting hot in here. All this talk about cocks and pecs and... I know. This is your episode. I know. This is all you, baby. I didn't know it was going to turn out like this. Sexy. So one of the downsides to having these preferences or being too specific in your preference. This goes way back in our, oh, I don't know.
i think it was year one year one year two we were looking through profiles a fit attractive couple about our age we at the time were in really good shape i've been a competitive athlete since high school i'm in good shape we were in extra good shape we were in really good shape then we're in fighting shape i'm i'm all right now i'm not as lumpy as as i have been not lumpy oh my lord but this couple the woman in particular was so specific about her preference i mean it's the one it's the whole they have to be a particular height particular weight their hair has to be a particular way it was extreme this was the most extreme i have.
Right? Because I've heard women who have the preference of, they must be taller than me. Which I kind of get, sort of. Same height actually works really well when you start thinking about kissing and penetrative intercourse at the same time. There's a lot to be said for being able to kiss and fuck at the same time i know and if they're too short or too tall that gets pretty awkward this particular person was so specific that she had identified a particular leg, the vastest muscle in the leg, that had to be developed to the point where in the profile pictures you could see it bulging out.
And Ed and I are like, what the fuck? We had to whip out an anatomy book. We're like, wait, wait muscle is this like i get it you know pretty damn fit what god i don't i got legs i'm a competitive cyclist i know i'm like yeah what muscle is that honey i think i would have been less offended if she'd said my cock wasn't big enough this was oh god this was so esoteric oh yeah that it just what does that do for you in the bedroom that's someone who and we said it back then i'm gonna say it again that's someone who didn't really want to play that's like no one one's going to match this criteria.
Oh, fuck no. Gold-plated anus. Nope. Yep. Sorry, you don't make my list. Right? You're like, oh, he really wants to swing, but she doesn't, so she's going to make this list impossible. Right. This is ridiculous. This is the princess and the pea. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. We have never seen them again. And we have never seen anything as ridiculous as that requirement ever again. I mean, we had a good laugh about it.
We're still laughing about it four years later but never holy crap talk about specific all right all right ed you better get busting ass because i need to see that vastest muscle on you because you're starting to get a little flabby well you know there's a very specific exercise where i i turn my ankle just the right way and i i lift just to work that muscle my calves are the size of peanuts but that muscle is huge peanuts your calves are not the size of peanuts no oh my god hilarious yeah well sadly we're done we're done with comedy hour finding the right fit is hard it's hard you're not it's hard to find yeah any four people who can sit in a room together and have a good time, let alone take their clothes off and have great sex.
It's hard. But when you can't find it, it's a lot of fun yeah so yeah keep your preferences simple yes go out with a positive attitude and have a good time yeah you'll have a good time and having a good time will inspire others to have a good time. And you never know, you might just find that four way connection. Absolutely. Before you turn off our podcast to take care of all the vanilla things pulling you away, please reach out and give us a review. I am the first to admit that it's much easier to give a five star rating, which we appreciate.
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