Want to send us a message? A review on Swinger Resorts: Temptations, Desire Riviera Maya and Desire Pearl. This review compares and contrasts the differences between the resorts by: demographic, food, entertainment, cost, resort size and percentage of swinger opportunity.SHOW NOTES:TemptationsDesire - Riviera MayaDesire - Pearl Support the showWant More?👀 Watch on YouTube: YouTube ShowFull video versions and interactive live episodes!Bonus episodes, exclusive content, and 🌶️Extras: https://www.patreon.com/SwingerUniversity 🛳️🎉Looking for lifestyle events in your area? T4P is the go-to directory for clubs, parties, and resort events. Browse now at Ticket4Play.com Custom SU T-shirts and gear: Our Amazon StoreSwingerLinks.com - live schedule, special offers*, and our 🌶️links!Our Website - Leave us a message, articles, and sexy products3 Ways to get your question on our show:RECORD it on our website at: https://swingeruniversity.com/contact/EMAIL a recorded voice note to: [email protected]: (916) 538-0482 and leave a voicemail.* We get a commission if you decide to purchase through our links, at no cost to you.
Transcript
We have to talk about something we've been genuinely excited about for months, and our patrons actually got a preview of this already. Jamaica! Yes, we are going back, and actually, we have a great offer for you guys. Yeah, it's Swingcation. It's October 11th through the 18th at Hedonism 2. And if you don't know what Swingcation is, it's pretty easy. Swinger plus kink plus vacation. It's a hosted group with real structure, workshops, lectures, real conversations with experts who are passionate about bringing and bridging that gap between the swinger world and the kink world.
And we're not just going as attendees. we're going as featured presenters, which is exciting. We'll be leading sessions. So if you come, we actually get to hang out with you. Which brings up something we should mention. When you use our code, yes, we got a code, you're not just getting a discount, you're getting the signature swing experience, which means $100 off per person, up to $200 per room, but it also means that we make time for you. An exclusive breakfast, lunch, cocktail hour, or one-hour and one time with us directly, plus more surprise benefits.
Here's something that's really unique. You could actually contribute by hosting a discussion or running a Skillshare. I know it's scary, but if you have something that you want to contribute, that's a big part of why this event is so special. Everyone there has something to bring to the table. All right, details. If you book before April 25th, you save $400. Plus, they gave us that special code that gets you an additional $200, and the special code is SWINGERU-VIP. So book through TicketForPlay.com forward slash Swinkie. That's T-I-C-K-E-T, the number four, play.com forward slash S-W-I-N-K-Y.
And use our code at checkout. And you guys, if you have any questions about the event, the resort, or what to expect, just reach out. I mean, we're here for you. We're happy to help. So once again, ticketforplay.com forward slash Swinky, the code SwingerU-VIP. We really want to see you there. You're listening to Swinger University, with Ed and Phoebe, offering you the naked facts about swinging. Here are your hosts, Ed and Phoebe. Hello, this is Ed. And this is Phoebe. Today we are comparing and contrasting the difference between three resorts.
Temptations, Desire Riviera Maya, and Desire Pearl. We talk about food, entertainment, cost, resort size, and the most important thing, the percentage of swinger opportunity. Absolutely. We'd also like to add that this is our own independent research and we're not being compensated for this review. God, I wish we were being compensated for this review or any of them, but no. We're going to go in order of resort, which is oldest to newest. It also happens to be more affordable to more expensive. And each review is going to have a section.
What the resort is like, what the demographic is like, the types of themes, entertainment and music provided, what the food, pool, hot tub and swinging is also like at each resort. So you'll be able to compare and contrast as we go along or if you're taking notes. Very cool. Yep. Well, let's start with Temptations. Temptations is the oldest resort in this group. It was the first one built, obviously, because it's the oldest. And I guess they call it the original resort. Like, that's the name for it, too. So people refer to it that way.
It was its original name, which is kind of funny that it was called the original resort. Right. It's much, much older. Now, how much older? Do we know how many years it is? That I don't know. Okay. So it's been around for a long time. I remember hearing about Temptations a long time ago. And I don't know that it started off as a swinger resort either no it was life uh lifestyle friendly lifestyle friendly and definitely clothing optional well this one now is topless only so i'm not sure if it was ever clothing optional maybe that's was. Maybe that's what it was. This one is topless only.
And you can get a membership. And I think you can get a membership to all of these. Do we know what the cost is? Well, the rooms are, no. I mean, you can look it up online. It varies. Right. Depending on the time of year and if running a special and whether you get like the deluxe membership or yeah the room the room size that you get or whether you want the garden view or not right so i didn't i didn't bother with that detail.
And I sure that by the time this publishes who knows what the resort prices are going to be they vary all the time so exactly your mileage will vary exactly but i have heard that because of the age they are intending to renovate soon so they'll be doing some upgrades yeah and they are intending to renovate soon. So they'll be doing some upgrades. Yeah, and that's because, in general, the rooms are small, old, and maybe not in the best shape. Yeah, they're just, I would say, dated. Yeah.
oh i don't know about that i don't know about that they're very clean and pleasant they're just you know a little dated sure so the demographic is 20 to 30 year olds so if you want to go a younger set yes if you want to go hang with the 20 to 30 year olds and party all night and into the early hours this is your spot to go the cultures are very blended so you have a nice mix of people and you know like i said young very hip very happening nice high energy nice fresh livers so probably lots of drinking right they can withstand all that yeah their entertainment each night they have a theme you will want to check the with the resort before you go they have it posted on the website but it is an example of what the themes are but they change all the time so if you're interested in bringing a costume for that event or for that that time frame that you're there call i would recommend call, find out what the theme nights are.
That way you can plan ahead of time. A lot of techno and EDM music, so nts. Oh, yeah. Get your boots and pants on. Exactly. Pool games are directed by the staff all day long. Really fun, sexy, titillating type of pool games. And they also have live entertainment and dancing in the evening. Very cool. Food. I like food. So the food is the same at Temptations, Riviera Maya, and Pearl. There's cafes. There's restaurants. There's an Asian fusion restaurant. Restaurant. There's a Mediterranean restaurant. Yeah.
So a variety of food and it's all inclusive so yes you can go to any of the restaurants that you want and i think they serve all the time the food is available or more so in the cafe the restaurants usually have reservations specific hours yes exactly and a dress code cafe, the restaurants usually have reservations. Specific hours, yeah. Yes, exactly. And a dress code, too, for the restaurants. And if you're interested in going to a specific restaurant while you're there, I recommend getting a reservation when you get there.
When you check in, book it, and then you have it because they fill up fast. Right. And again, same with all the other resorts. Now, the pool has a swim-up bar, which is super fun. I love that feature. It's very cool. and they have day beds that you can reserve around the pool, daybeds around the pool, lounges around the pool, but you have to put your name in to RSVP those.
Members are first served and non-members first come first serve right so you get a little perk there if you're a member of the resort now the pool closes at 11 p.m and this depends a little bit on the time of year i'm not sure exactly why but this pool at temptations stays open the latest all the other resorts close earlier again i'm not sure why maybe it's due to staff i i'm not sure maybe there's just they found that a lot of people aren't in the pool late at night because they've been in all day long and they're playing right right or they're in the hot tub or they're in the hot tub and the hot tub is there at the pool level yes they're right next to each other yeah at temptations yes for swinging typicallyemptations, there's not a lot of swinging.
You will get a lot of exhibitionists. And if you do get some swinging, it's more of an unplanned, drunken, swapping thing rather than a conscious decision to set out and swing. It one of those we happen to be in the hot tub we had a few drinks one thing led to another it felt good at the time oh it was crazy it was down in cancun what stays in cancun happens in cancun stays in cancun? Happens in Cancun. Stays in Cancun. Exactly. So. Accidental swinging. Yep. I just slipped and fell on his dick. My. All right. So that's Temptations for you.
Now we're going to go up a little bit in price scale to desire riviera maya and this resort is the second oldest it has 114 rooms it is clothing optional and it's a little more affordable than pearl so desire owns two resorts or there's two resorts with the name desire but one is riviera maya and the second one is pearl maya came first we're going to shorten that to rm so rm came first then pearl rm is a little bit smaller than pearl and they have two choices for room prices you can either have garden or oceanside i've heard both are fabulous but the price point changes a little bit this resort also has a membership option okay can we talk about october for a second oh my god yeah i've been waiting for this we were invited to be guest speakers for two engagements on a six-star crystal cruise ship with 310 lifestyle couples and it sails from montreal to boston during the peak foliage season i'm super excited and honestly i'm really nervous yeah it's kind of a version of like a swinger ted talk that we're gonna have to do oh my god i know and more importantly if you know the brand Thank you.
Kind of a version of like a swinger TED talk that we're going to have to do. Oh, my God. I know. And more importantly, if you know the brand, it's LLV, Luxury Lifestyle Vacations. You may have seen them and they're sexy playmakers with their fun red hats. This ship, the Crystal Symphony, is classy. butler service for every single room, Michelin rated restaurants, full spa, clothing optional, sensual playrooms, like everything, theme nights and international DJ. So it's luxury and nudity. Oh man, this is going to be great.
The bottom line is we want you there with us it's 310 couples and like all their vacations they book up fast they really do their vacations are extremely popular so please come with us and in order to find it all you have to do is go to our swingerlinks.com and look for the llv sensage. We hope you'll join us. Demographic. So the age group for Temptations was, you know, 20s, 30s. For Riviera Maya, RM, 30s to 50s, but we're kind of leaning more on the 40 to 50 side. That typically starts to make sense with the more expensive kind of destination, swinging, events, lifestyle, opportunities. Yeah.
Because as income goes up or responsibilities and costs go down, because your kids have moved out, you're older. Right. You've got more disposable income. Yeah. So they start taking more of your money from you at these resorts. Right. So it starts to kind of weed down the population to an older group. Right. There's a higher Central American and Latin population and not as many English speakers. So a lot of people from Mexico and South America and Central America come up to this resort as their destination. This is, it's in their neighborhood, right? They just kind of travel up.
Exactly exactly so if you're not comfortable speaking you know another language or you are or whatever your thing is i mean just know i like the challenge i would be on babble trying to learn spanish right before i right before I went. But that makes you a little nervous. You know, maybe not your thing. If you don't really care, you know, I could care less. A wink and a nod and a kiss and a touch. And that's all I need.
You don't need to talk the international language exactly we had we had a great time in costa rica with the couples that were locals yeah we didn't speak didn't understand a word hardly any spanish the spanish that i remembered was from like fifth grade so useless yeah and we had a great time with them yeah we did yeah it was fantastic it was fun vacation entertainment theme and music again very similar to temptations each night is a theme again check with the resort before you The nightclub is, I'm not quite sure about the nightclub for Temptations, but RM does have a nightclub and this nightclub is going to be bigger than Pearl.
It is bigger than Pearl. People tend to dance a little bit longer and the music is same so me i'm not sure why people tend to dance a little bit longer, and the music is the same. So, I'm not sure why they tend to dance longer, maybe because they're a little bit younger. But that's the way it was. When you say the music is the same, are we still talking techno, EDM, or is it a little more well-rounded? No. Same as the pool.
Boots and pants.rounded no same as a pool boots and pants now the food um not as pricey as pearl but the you know you can pay for some up charges and the cuisine is a little more cultural and not quite as gourmet as pearl so once again starting to step up but some tears here right uh quite as you know upper tier as pearl sensing a pattern yeah we're we're ascending up climbing the ladder climbing the ladder I don't know.
as pearl sensing a pattern yeah we're we're ascending up climbing the ladder climbing the ladder pool's got a swim up bar again it's a smaller pool than desire pearl and members can once again reserve lounges and daybeds by the pool. Non-members, first come, first serve. Members, first served. And the pool closes at 7 p.m., and that varies from time to time, depending on the season. So we started at 11, now we're down to 7. Because we're older.
Yeah, they expect most people to be asleep by nine i'm assuming we gotta get our sex on before the night is over hey and you know what if the pool closes down and that means other activities start kicking up i'm all in favor exactly i like the pool as much as the next guy, but sun's down. I'm not trying to stay cool. I'm trying to get hot. Speaking of hot, the hot tub, which might explain where everyone goes after 7 p.m., is at the top of a long flight of stairs.
so if you have any knee problems or balance issues because you drank a little bit too much that night that's never gonna happen i'm sure so it's great for watching the sunset and the rooftop view is phenomenal however it takes a bit of of a trek to get up there you gotta bring your backpack so drink moderately so that you can see the view otherwise you're not getting up there you just get up there sober you drink and then if i don't know hopefully somebody rolls you out of the hot tub i don't know find someone to carry you down that could be fun right I don't know hopefully somebody rolls you out of the hot tub i don't know find someone to carry you down that could be fun right hopefully he's sober yeah that's a million hits on youtube swinging so a lot of voyeurism a lot of exhibitionism with your own partner so it's kind of keep to your own watch it's sexy it's hot to watch it's hot to put on a show right oh live sex oh my god and groups or clicks kind of form and people often arrive with friends or groups and it's kind of hard to mingle when you go to this is true of any destination if a group of people have come together yeah you've got to like break in it's not impossible now trust us swingers like making new friends so don't feel awkward or embarrassed about going up and introducing yourself to a hot group of people right trust me they if they like you are going to be just fine with that right so they should be i mean i do know that a lot of people stay in touch over the years they've met once they stay in touch they coordinate the next time they're going to be there and one lives in california one lives in ohio and they just want to spend all their time with their new friends that they met a year ago and that's the place they reconnect absolutely so maybe they may not be as open to adding more people it's a possibility it's beyond me i can't imagine because more is better for me conversation or maybe a drink that's all i'm saying but some people just want to stick to who they know and i'm like the more the merrier yes we are definitely the more the merrier so you know you know just be aware you could run into that play areas yes apparently this play area is much larger than pearl it's a it's less intimate in the sense that it's bigger which is great more space more space you get a little more voy, and it tends to be more frequented because there are actually more people at the resort.
Which makes sense. You know, price comes down a little bit. More people can afford it. More people come in. More places to play. Exactly. And who doesn't like to watch? I love to watch. Desire Pearl. Now we're at the upper echelon. Mmm, creme de la creme. This resort is the most expensive of all three. It is clothing optional.
They do run daily specials on their website 24 hour sales so if you're interested in a sale i would say put it on your daily calendar to look every day as part as part of your normal routine get up brush your teeth check your email go to desire pearl check for the special right don't eat in that order don't even have your coffee just boom we'll get your coffee We'll be right back.
go to desire pearl check for the special right don't eat in that order don't even have your coffee just boom we'll get your coffee oh i forgot the bathroom you gotta have bathroom break in there yeah okay bathroom break teeth pearl then coffee in that order and stay away from the corn snowflakes oh. I've heard they put something in there. Right. And I think the other resorts also run these daily specials as well. A lot of places have daily specials. Right. They'll be us. You know, they haven't booked all their rooms. They try and push the sale. Airlines do this. Everybody does this.
Hotels.com created an entire business because of this. Yes. So there you go. They try and pack the place.
And just like a cruise ship, as far as food and entertainment, only on land with far less people so far less people yeah now while this resort is clothing optional you must be naked in the hot tub wait you can actually wear clothes in hot tubs i wasn't aware of this is this a thing yeah it's called a bathing suit i don't know what you're talking about oh okay yeah i thought hot tubs were always naked i know that that's what your parents taught you it's always been the thing i know even beaches and all yeah and most people don't leave the resort because you know you paid a lot of money to get there you paid a lot of money to stay there and you know you may choose to not get out and explore so decide if you're an explorer or a resorter if you want to see more of the country go for it if you don't then you know don't and i suspect if it's anything like the cruise if you do want to go on excursions that you go on a planned excursion and work with your travel agent work with the resort to find those because kind of venturing out on your own results will vary right you may or may not get what you expect right now this resort has 88 rooms much smaller, but they are more spacious and larger.
They are all ocean view, and that's part of the reason why there's fewer rooms, because of the way they designed the property. Every room on the bottom floor has a jacuzzi. Oh. Right? I know. I did get prices for Pearl. But again, it is going to change. Yeah. Specials.
Year-to-year specials year to year special year to year covid right it's all gonna be different so i got prices for pearl so that you can kind of see what the upper echelon price was and then figure out where you want to you know focus your so the cheap seat in the stadium yeah 6.75 a night yep more than a cruise more than a cruise and there's no option like an inside cabin versus a you know deck level cabin versus whatever right port was it a balcony view 675 it's expensive cheapest room not that's cheapest room most rooms are in the 700 to range. We would classify that as very expensive.
And then you can get a master suite for $8.50 a night, which isn't actually that much of a bump from the regular room. It might actually be worth the extra $50, depending on what the amenities are right spa services are available at this resort they do cost extra and they are the same as prices you would find in the united states so that's considered very expensive for Mexico. Right. Because if you go into, I mean, Costa Rica, Central America, Mexico, things tend to cost less. Exactly. Standard of living is lower. Cost is lower. Mm-hmm.
However, you are guaranteed a happy ending for both men and women. Oh, I did not know that. Uh-huh. Oh, that's nice. So it's kind of worth the price. You're paying for the service. Right.
Although, I guess you can get that here in the states it's probably get it downtown where we live but you know you run the risk of it being raided by the cops so arrested yeah yeah solicitation charges it's tempting but it's tempting spa service reservations do it early when you arrive because they fill up fast that's because of the cucumber water that they serve oh is that it yeah or that the happy endings one of the two that was the hot towel yeah the hot towel I don't know.
one of the two that was the hot towel yeah the hot towel that'd be a fun experience just the whole happy ending thing i know i think you'd like it i would no i'd hate it it would be terrible just torture you'd have to start out laying on your back because just the thought of it happening is gonna get you hard oh the second you walk through the door i'd be you're like i have a tent now hello where do i lay like let's just start with that again. Where should I put this thing? Premier membership. You can get a premier membership. Now, this is quite a bit more expensive than the other resorts.
It's a lot like a timeshare for $40,000 a year. You get a butler for your room every time you go. You're guaranteed a chair by the pool reserved for you. You don't even have to ask. You get 14 days in the penthouse and 300 guest nights in any other size room for the 40k got it so for 40k you can have a bunch of guests come on your dime i mean you you can yes I guess so 300 guest nights I mean, that's, and it's probably, like, if a couple came, that's two guest nights. So 150 nights, that's a lot. 40, yeah.
It's like, we'll have to do some math on that and then we're gonna have to do an internet search for people who are looking for friends and if you have 40k just sitting in your pocket right now yeah i'm sure you could figure that out yeah probably not a lot of people on that list. I'm not on that list. We just bought a house. But if you're on that list and you'd like to invite us, send us an email at swingeruniversity at gmail.com Because the more the merrier.
Hey, we're quite the entertaining couple here's why we sail on virgin it's adults only no kids screaming at breakfast no family buffet lines just champagne at noon late night pool parties and people who actually want to be there. The vibe? Think boutique hotel that happens to float. Tattoo parlors, drag brunch, restaurants you'd actually pay for on land. Plus, when you're looking to connect with other couples who know how to have fun, let's just say Virgin attracts a very specific type of adventurist. No wonder Breadcruisers here, just your people. All right. So then, if that wasn't...
We need like platinum music.
It's not like dramatic music it's not like dun it's more like cha-ching i don't know something right okay so so talk about the icing on the cake the crème de la crème exclusive rooms the villa private pool and hot tub so you got your own resort within a resort only eight rooms six figure income to stay there so i guess they check your tax bracket well usually people with a six figure income will kind of how do i say if you have a six figure income this won't be an issue an issue for you if you don't it's probably gonna be too expensive well yeah if you if you have less than a six-figure income don't even bother i get that but you can aspire there's nothing wrong to go for the dream go for the dream it's nice but it keeps you somewhat isolated from the rest of the group, right?
Like you're off in the VIP lounge. Everybody else is someplace else. They can't get in because... It's private. This is like... Yeah. Bada boom, bada bing, exclusive. It's like a resort within a resort. Right.
You have access to all the other amenities amenities but no one can come into your area where your rooms are your pool and your hot tub now you can invite guests back i'm sure but you can't mix and mingle right that the op that target opportunity not going to happen right the only mixing and mingling you're going to have is if you leave the mountaintop and go live with the villagers yes yes all right but it has some advantages so because a lot of people come with friends that they've met right right so they're Like hey joe and suzy and frank and and charlise what you know that's two four six eight right there we're all going you mean muffy miffy and yeah yeah and they set a date and they all descend at the same time and that's i mean that's their their thing yeah and then and it's great like if you can afford this and you've got a bunch of friends for a small group then you get to set up your own little exclusive party it's kind of cool i kind of i kind of dig that idea but it all depends on what you want right it the world is your oyster and i would dig having that much income to be able to just have my own resort within a resort that's already exclusive but if you choose to mingle with the rest of the guests, you're going to have to leave the palace.
So it really depends on how you swing. If you swing, what are you looking for? Are you looking for new? Are you looking for the strange? Something not the typical, like your friends, your close group that you hang with all the time. If you're looking for something different, it exactly it's gonna be a little harder right all right demographic mostly canadian american a lot of white people not a lot of cultural differences not a lot of brown not a lot of black not a lot of tan unless it's fake tan yeah so I suspect this is because of... Sadly, income. Yeah. And it tends to be a... Unbalanced.
Yeah. Yeah.
So your demographic will be 40 to 50 plus in age and more affluent people because of the cost of the rooms right entertainment music the themes all the same as the other clubs however the nightclub is a little different but before i talk about the nightclub the lobby does have music for about 9 to 9 30 and i believe rm does this as well and maybe temptations so there's more mingly kind of yeah atmospheric kind of music this environment where they're encouraging you to mingle so it's really nice in that regard it gets people to to get together to be active and engaged so pearl's nightclub starts after 9 30 when the lobby music has died off or is done and it's really tiny it's a very very tiny dance floor and honestly not a lot of people go because it gets too packed too packed people are too hot it's uncomfortable but what usually happens is they'll go for the show so there's a stage and the and the and a bar and those are really big but the dancers will start i don't know about shortly there after 9 30 9 30 to 10 and they put on a show for about 20 to 30 minutes and it's incredible it's sexy it's hot people love it and then after it's done everyone basically leaves and goes to the hot tub so uh-huh so they don't really dance they basically just go for the entertainment and get a little warm up now this could change based on when you're there right crowd's different crowd is different right right and all of this will also change if the resort has a takeover right so if you've got another swinger podcast that has booked the entire resort and they're doing a takeover oh yeah this is throw all this information out the window because that's a target rich environment for all swingers sure so your percentage of swinging is going to go up a lot oh yeah yeah because of the podcast and all swingers will go specifically to swing and to hang out yeah and and we've listened to those other podcasts um life on the swing set does it take over um they'll do all kinds of activities there's swinging down might do one as well it doesn't surprise me they they'll do things you know they'll do demonstrations they'll do sibbing demonstrations they'll do sporting demonstrations interviews all kinds of fun stuff and they kind of bring the party with them so anytime you see an opportunity with a takeover the group is going to be a little bit more i don't know active together yeah there's this different kind of synergy it's just like it's i don't know, active, together?
Yeah, there's this different kind of synergy. It's just like, I don't know, kind of electric. Yeah. Yeah. You get less random, if you will. Yes, yes. It's kind of like going out to a nightclub. When you know a band is playing, you know there's going to be more things going on.
Or you know that everyone likes that band, which is why they're're there so you're going to have more in common hence the takeover yeah so if you want to gear your trip to a takeover you can definitely contact the resort for when those times are set aside in the year yep they've got all that stuff listed exactly food is a little more gourmet you can check the menu when you arrive make reservation that day because once again restaurants are small things book fast yep it's a very transient community because people are arriving and leaving all the time so when you get there book your stuff yep don't necessarily follow the website for the menu it's a sample call ahead if you want to know about the week that you are going it to be a little bit more precise and the pearl restaurant different cuisine each night so they rotate french italian mediterranean they also have a is the name of the restaurant suki yep okay and.
And it's an Asian fusion, Chinese, Vietnamese blend. Mm-hmm. They have a buffet, which is always super handy when you're not sure exactly what you want to eat. You want a little of this, little of that. And then they have the Aphrodite, which is a casual grill environment which kind of sounds like the cruise right by the pool where they had hamburgers and hot dogs and it was very picnicky ding so if you just need that snack you want to have a little burger to tide you over aphrodite yep and then of course there's always room service yes I'll see you next time.
you want to have a little burger to tide you over aphrodite yep and then of course there's always room service yes which is very handy when you've had a very late night doing who knows what and you just need a little something in the morning pool music edm the pool is bigger than desire, R.M., Vera, Maya, and it closes at 4 p.m., which is even earlier. That's crazy. I know. I think it's because people get ready for dinner. They go to dinner. They go watch the entertainment, and then they all just head to the hot tub. It's just got to be the way they've got things scheduled. Yeah.
Hey there, podcast listeners. You've been tuning into our episodes, but have you ever wondered about the steamy details of our adventures or maybe hungry for some sultry, erotic stories? Well, guess what? We've got something special just for you. Our exclusive Patreon page. It's like a VIP pass to the saucier side of our world.
So if you're ready for an exclusive behind-the-mic experience, head over to our Patreon page now page now trust us this is where the magic happens see you there patrons the hot tub in this place is massive and probably one of the reasons why the pool closes because the hot tub is so big and everyone spends so much time in there in the evening it's literally the size of a small house it's huge it's designed to be very cozy and intimate so it has these little pockets where you can kind of you know go off into this little nook and chat it up with another couple. Canoodle. Yep.
You must be naked in the hot tub. Of course. Of course. There are day beds all around. Fucking is not. Oh, fucking is allowed in the hot tub. Sorry.
Fucking is allowed in the hot tub sorry fucking is allowed in the hot tub and on the day beds around the hot tub yes so there you go you can have fun at the hot tub yes but you know Typically, there's a lot of finger banging and jerking people off in the in the hot tub and one of my dear friends calls it swinger soup so she doesn't like to get she doesn't like to get in it because it's a little bit much a little biological little but yeah but a lot of people do it a lot of people have a good time and you pick your poison i mean with enough alcohol it cleans everything right right now obviously we're in the middle of covid so i'd rather probably take that over covid so yeah i try not to think about the swinger suit part of it too much but if i'm yeah if i get a random sperm on my arm that probably honestly died five minutes before in the chlorine i'm not gonna worry about it too much because i'm more concerned about covid yes all right ed are there swingers here are they there are they anywhere yes well we don't know if they're still out there if you're still out there i know let us know we haven't left our house in forever i know it's driving us nuts there are established groups people often arrive with friends groups we talked about the takeovers it's kind of hard for new couples that don't know anybody this is very typical on any kind of like established community whether it's a you know, regular hotel takeover or a destination resort where people all flew together to be there at the same time, you kind of got to break the ice and work your way into the crowd.
So if you're shy, if you're an introvert, you'll have a hard time kind of breaking into a new group, but time to put your extrovert hat on, go introduce yourself to a couple of couples and get in there. Didn't see a lot of people playing or swapping in public.
So kind of plays into that whole group dynamic where people are coupled up already they go back to their room they have their fun they come back to the pool to watch be excited titillated etc exactly 50 of the people rough statistics are non-players they don't play they're not swingers necessarily they're just lifestylers if you will they like the sexy environment and they just want to hang out and be naked around the pool they like to watch people being sexy it's like the vibe yeah it's very liberating yep but this is where it gets us you're paying 700 to 800 a night and you're not swapping so you went to a swinger resort with a big swinger tax on it but you're not going to swing a swinger tax yeah that's a good way to say it yeah because you could have just gone to temptations and seen topless right and gotten sexy right but not paid that much but i guess without the full swap or the the sex true it's going to be a little bit different.
You don't get the live porn. Honestly, I don't know. It's expensive. It's got its pros and cons. Some people will argue, well, why didn't you just go to a nudist resort? Well, there are kids there, and you don't see live porn, basically. Yeah, and they do all kinds of stuff to spray you with cold hoses and stuff to keep you calm. She does walk around with a whistle, though. Yeah. I don't know if she actually works there anymore. She may not. They called her the pool Nazi at one of these naked nudist resorts that we go to.
And she hasn't been seen in a while, so I think've retired her sent her out to pasture yeah she'd literally blow the whistle at you if you were like hugging someone you see a friend right across the pool oh hi jane oh you go over hug her tweet there goes the whistle yeah it was very i know abrupt and she and she wasn't the most polite person either which was a whole other thing but anyway we digress sorry 25 soft swap so 50 are non-players 25 are soft swappers we've got 25 left what what's left 5% hard swappers and and these are not actual statistics right I know because obviously this doesn't add up yeah because we're we're missing some percentages here hey we don't do math but but the hard swappers it's pretty low at pearl so if you're looking to you know fuck somebody on your seven to eight hundred dollar a night you had swinger event for a whole week you might have better luck in your hometown or one state over paying a lot less for a hotel room and a night at the club right so i i don't know again depends on what you want and how you want to spend your money and all absolutely and and there's advantage to this maybe you don't like boats maybe you just want to hang out by the pool in the hot tub and like that's your idea of vacation drink a lot watch sexy things and you just want to relax yeah it's relaxing sure i totally get that and you go home with great stories and it re-stimulates your relationship and that's just great absolutely i love it there are two play areas the hot tub which is very large and they do have a playroom there's one playroom here it's extremely tiny tiny it's smaller than a hotel room and it's just off the dance floor in the club there's no beds there's two couches and i've never seen anyone playing there no yeah the entire week so there you go special treats you can arrange for a dinner in the middle of the pool they set this platform up with a dining room table all that so you're literally floating in the pool you get the sensation that you're floating in the pool you're not i mean you are but you're not Thank you.
So you're literally floating in the pool. You get the sensation that you're floating in the pool. I mean, you are, but you're not. You're probably standing at the bottom. No. You're on top of the water, but it's so cool. Yeah. So that's pretty neat. Now, is this in the castle, or is this down with the villagers? No, it's down with the villagers. Okay.
Yeah, it's down with the villagers okay yeah it's down with the villagers of course that costs some money that's an extra cha-ching you can have a balcony dinner in your rooms so you know they it's like room service but better right right much better they have wine tastings and those can all of these things can cost up to about 700 per person oh my god so depending on Which one you pick, you might be spending $1,400 for you and your spouse okay so at the end of seven days we're up to $5,000 plus your airline plus your flight plus your parking yep plus your or uber yeah yeah, you know, throw in a few extras here and there.
There's another, you know, three grand. Three grand? Well, because you do that twice in a week at 700 bucks a pop. That's 1,400 and 1,400. That's almost three grand. Well, yeah. Well, you probably wouldn't do it twice. I'm not going to do it twice at that. Hey, there you go. No, you might do it once for a special occasion. Just for the thrill of it. You know, save up. That's what I got to say. If you want to do it, save up.
Don't't i got two cruises right here on my calculator okay wait so do some math for us ed so so let's just go what eight hundred dollars a night okay eight hundred dollars a night for per person uh-huh times oh is that per person? Oh, heck yeah. All right. Yeah. Times two. I think so. I don't think it's per couple. I could be wrong. Well, we'll go with that. We'll go with that. What's the number?
And how many nights seven uh a week so it's only eleven thousand dollars okay maybe it's not per person yeah i don't think it's per person it must be per couple i'm so sorry fifty six hundred dollars though oh that's so much easier we could just do that now. I've got cash right now that I can do. But then you've got to add about $1,500 for airline. And add another $300 for parking. Just say $300. Gas, parking. Okay. And then what you want this? Do you want to add some those that's 1400 1400 okay hey 8800 it's under 10 grand you're all good it's less than a new roof it's less than a car. Just.
It really depends on what kind of experience that you want to have. Identifying if you are a swinger or more of an exhibitionist or voyeur will help determine your choice as well as the place. all in all we have heard each resort offers plenty of entertainment food and a really really good time absolutely fun place good times it just depends on what you're looking for exactly before you turn off our podcast to take care of all the vanilla things pulling you away, please reach out and give us a review.
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