Want to send us a message? Today’s elective course is about the April 2019 Bliss Swinger Cruise. We’ll talk about what to expect, what to bring, and some sexy stories. Grab your sunscreen cause its a hot one. Let’s get sailing...SHOW NOTESBliss Swinger CruiseWhat to Bring Other Than ClothesWhat to ExpectMeet and GreetsDemonstrationsPool Parties and GamesPlayrooms: Types, Mood, Cleanliness, ProvisionsDining with Others Support the showWant More?👀 Watch on YouTube: YouTube ShowFull video versions and interactive live episodes!Bonus episodes, exclusive content, and 🌶️Extras: https://www.patreon.com/SwingerUniversity 🛳️🎉Looking for lifestyle events in your area? T4P is the go-to directory for clubs, parties, and resort events. Browse now at Ticket4Play.com Custom SU T-shirts and gear: Our Amazon StoreSwingerLinks.com - live schedule, special offers*, and our 🌶️links!Our Website - Leave us a message, articles, and sexy products3 Ways to get your question on our show:RECORD it on our website at: https://swingeruniversity.com/contact/EMAIL a recorded voice note to: [email protected]: (916) 538-0482 and leave a voicemail.* We get a commission if you decide to purchase through our links, at no cost to you.
Transcript
We have to talk about something we've been genuinely excited about for months, and our patrons actually got a preview of this already. Jamaica! Yes, we are going back, and actually, we have a great offer for you guys. Yeah, it's Swingcation. It's October 11th through the 18th at Hedonism 2. And if you don't know what Swingcation is, it's pretty easy. Swinger plus kink plus vacation. It's a hosted group with real structure, workshops, lectures, real conversations with experts who are passionate about bringing and bridging that gap between the swinger world and the kink world.
And we're not just going as attendees. We're going as featured presenters, which is exciting. We'll be leading sessions. So if you come, we actually get to hang out with you. Which brings up something we should mention. When you use our code, yes, we got a code, you're not just getting a discount. You're getting the signature swing experience, which means $100 off per person, up to $200 per room. But it also means that we make time for you, an exclusive breakfast, lunch, cocktail hour, or one hour and one time with us directly, plus more surprise benefits.
Here's something that's really unique. You could actually contribute by hosting a discussion or running a Skillshare. I know it's scary, but if you have something that you want to contribute, that's a big part of why this event is so special. Everyone there has something to bring to the table. All right, details. If you book before April 25th, you save $400. Plus, they gave us that special code that gets you an additional $200, and the special code is SWINGERU-VIP. So book through TicketForPlay.com forward slash Swinky. That's T-I-C-K-E-T, the number four.
So book through TicketForPlay.com forward slash Swinkie. That's T-I-C-K-E-T, the number four, play.com forward slash S-W-I-N-K-Y. And use our code at checkout. And you guys, if you have any questions about the event, the resort, or what to expect, just reach out. I mean, we're here for you. We're happy to help. So once again, ticketforplay.com forward slash Swinky, the code SwingerU-VIP. We really want to see you there. You're listening to The Swinger University with Ed and Phoebe, an educational podcast about swinging.
Nothing in life comes with a manual, so our intent is to provide a concise podcast to help make sense of the complex and fluid nature of sexuality and swinging as a hobby. You will hear about our growth, challenges, and excitement through our personal stories. We will offer our suggestions on what works well and what doesn't each step of the way. We appreciate the existing Swinger podcast community and hope our offering will enrich an ever-growing sex-positive society. This podcast discusses sexuality between consenting adults and is intended for mature audiences.
We are not licensed professionals and this podcast is for entertainment purposes only. Welcome back to our podcast. Today we are going to talk about the April 2019 Bliss Swinger Cruise. We'll talk about what to expect, what to bring, and some of our fun. Our ship hosted 1,500 couples which facilitated a lot of great conversations, connections, and copulations. So let's get sailing! So what is a Swingers cruise? Well, we weren't sure what to expect. We'd heard some good things about them.
We'd talked to couples over the years about various destination events the desire resorts the cruises hedonism and we decided to try a cruise and and i can't remember why we picked the cruise over anything else but it was just it it was just one of those spur of the moment things we were like you know what let's just do it let's pull the trigger and let's just go yes and we'd heard enough good things but we kind of went into it with almost a a naive anticipation of fun right we just knew it was going to be fun but we didn't know exactly what that meant right of course i had a lot of questions and i asked my friend some things but still as many questions as i asked it still didn't paint the picture that it was because everyone's experience is different yeah we were learning things about the cruise today when we were preparing for the podcast that we didn't even realize at the time so it doesn't matter how much research you do how much how many podcasts you listen to right etc you're still going to learn things and you're going to discover stuff after the fact and even on the cruise.
So, anyway. And the only thing I would say is that, you know, if you're going to go, just go with the intent that you're obviously going to be on there for five or seven days and make the best of it. If you start to freak out. Yeah, take a deep breath. Take a deep deep breath find a nice quiet place and and reconnect right so so let's talk about this a little bit so here's some basic facts about the bliss cruises that are going on right now uh first first fact there is a spring and a fall cruise now we did an april cruise so it was a spring cruise, and it's a five-day cruise.
And the boat that we happened to be on was about 1,500 couples. So that means that there's 3,000 people on the boat, quite a few people. There's also a fall cruise. Now, the fall cruises are seven days. You get two extra days, which at the time sounded like too much.
also a fall cruise now the fall cruises are seven days you get two extra days which at the time sounded like too much but after we were on day four or five we were like oh my god it's gonna be over yeah we just got our groove on i wish we had two more days i had so much fun it was it was a blast the fall cruises at least the ones that we've looked at and the ones we've signed up for are on larger ships they go for seven days you get the the two extra days and one of them that we were looking at has 3 000 couples now this is an absolutely massive ship so the 2021 cruise is going to be on something called the Oasis of the Seas.
And it's jibungus. That's overwhelming. We didn't even meet half the people on the cruise. I mean, you've got to figure meeting some percentage of 1,500 couples. Double that. So there's some good things there. One of the really cool things about having that many people of this mindset all in one place is more likely than not, you're going to find somebody who you can get along with, assuming that you can find them, which we'll describe in some of the pieces of this, how to increase your chances of finding somebody who is of like mind or at least, you know, like sexual preferences. Exactly.
The other thing to consider between the two different ship sizes are amenities. So what's on the ship?
The larger ships have rock walls and water slides and more playrooms and more pools and probably we haven't been on a larger cruise yet but probably more opportunities for different kinds of events going on all at the same time so typically on our ship there were three or four events going on all at the same time so there was always something going on at the pool there was always something going on in the this one forward area called the constellation room and there was something going on in the martini lounge and in this other bar area so almost, oh, and there was stuff going on in the conference room, which we didn't even realize.
We missed the whole conference room thing. I know. So just that gives you an impression of how huge this thing is.
I mean, it's an absolutely massive ship, and there's just so much to do, which is why we've booked two of the seven day cruises for the future because we don't want to miss out on anything exactly and it's one of those things where even if you stay up until three o'clock in the morning we still missed stuff yeah and i never thought i'd stay up that late and i did no we're like nine o'clock in bed in bed i like my sleep and and other things in bed yes but we're typically not the night owl stay up late party till the break of dawn kind of people to to not age us too much we're getting too old for that shit so anyway we prefer our sleep we prefer our our quality time and and we're not really big partiers but there's so much to do and there's so many people to meet yes anyway so and we liked spending most of our time in the playroom we we did and we opted a lot of times to to move to a playroom instead of hanging out in a dance club we like dancing yeah we like dancing a lot but well i'm there to we're in rome we're gonna be like romans i'm just saying yes so we were roman oh that was so fun can't wait to talk about that so and i'm using so a lot so i'm going to try and cut that out here are some of the things you want to bring on the cruise.
We had a suggestion about contact cards. We affectionately called hoe cards. And they're great to hand to people that you want to stay connected with on the cruise or off the cruise. And I'll go into those details in a second. but it is, I will say it is difficult to stay in touch with people on their cruise, even if you've given them a card. If they don't have the, didn't buy the internet package and they don't have their phone on them because then you can't text them.
And a lot of the apps like Kik or I think Facebook Messenger worked, but if they're not if they don't have the kick app or whatever app is going to work on the internet everybody's on a different app you're not going to be able to connect with them so and like i said a lot of people aren't carrying their phone they just left it in their room i stopped carrying my phone probably the second day in because nobody else had their phones i mean if you if you're at the pool, most people are not bringing their cell phones. You're dancing, you're drinking, you're splashing around.
Like getting in contact with people is hit and miss at best with a phone. Right. Okay. Can we talk about October for a second? Oh, my God. Yeah, I've been waiting for this. We were invited to be guest speakers for two engagements on a six star crystal cruise ship with three hundred and ten lifestyle couples. And it sails from Montreal to Boston during the peak foliage season.
I'm super excited and excited and honestly i'm really nervous yeah it's kind of a version of like a swinger ted talk that we're gonna have to do oh my god i know and more importantly if you know the brand it's llv luxury lifestyle vacations you may have seen them and they're sexy playmakers with their fun red hats. This ship, the Crystal Symphony, is classy. Butler service for every single room, Michelin rated restaurants, full spa, clothing optional, sensual playrooms, like everything. Theme nights and international DJ.
So it's luxury and nudity oh man this is gonna be great the bottom line is we want you there with us it's 310 couples and like all their vacations they book up fast they really do their vacations are extremely popular so please come with us and in order to find it all you have to do is go to our swingerlinks.com and look for the llv sensual voyage we hope you'll join us so but what the the cards do provide is a contact a way of staying in touch with people a face picture so our cards have a picture of our face on there they have our phone number they have our kick account they have our email account and what our profile names on all the different sites that we're on yes and on the back we included included the QR code so that people don't have – they can just scan it, and it goes – all that information goes right into their contact list.
Right. And you don't have to worry about typing it, mistyping it. So if they really desire to get in touch, they just scan it, and they have everything.
So we just try to to make it easy for people i thought it was great marketing because if you want someone to really contact you then make it easy absolutely give them give them everything that they need in order to get in contact with you the other thing that we put on the cards was a small spot to write in a room number now we didn't print our cards with our cruise room number on why because i knew i wasn't going to give out a hundred cards on the cruise and i'm going to use these again we're going to use these again at different events so when we do a hotel takeover or we're going to a party we can write our hotel room number on those exact same cards yep they're reusable we can use them in multiple places so there you go the other thing that people bring to are on the cruise are door decorations we heard a lot about this on several forums and we didn't go too crazy with that some people went super crazy they brought pictures uh whiteboards all kinds of magnet things and what we found mostly is that they're just entertain me entertaining uh some people would use a whiteboard to say where they're going to be and at first we tried that but then we were always changing our mind we'd run into somebody and we're like well we were going to the martini bar but we ran into this other couple and they wanted to go to the gelato bar so we followed them to the gelato exactly so it it's it it's difficult to communicate in that way but what i would say is for the door decorations, if you're going to do something, go big.
So if you're going to bring a couple back to your room, the biggest thing that we, the best thing that we saw was someone put a big red boa all the way around their door, which was fabulous. Because they forgot the number but they remember that you were on that their number started with a two and which meant you're on the second floor second floor all they had to do was walk up and down the length of the ship and look for the red big red boa yeah easy absolutely so that's what we're gonna do next year yeah so we'll pick something that's easily distinguishable from everybody else's door.
We'll find something. We'll find something that will be distinguishable from all the way down the hall. See, the advantage is someone steps down into this hallway, and they look down this long column of doors, and there it is. There's the, I don't know, dancing monkey. Who knows? Something fun hanging right off the front of the door. You can easily find that door. So we'll be like, hey, come to the Tiki Room. And they'll be like, Tiki Room? And there it is. Anyway. That's fun. Clothing. So we actually did really well with packing for this trip. We plotted out our clothes well in advance.
You even took photographs of all of the outfits. Oh, my God, ladies. This helps so much. I laid it out on the bed. I happen to have a black bed spread. So this really helped. And then I stood on a step stool and I took a photo. I tried to coordinate bottoms with tops. So bottoms you can typically wear a few days in a row and you just switch out your tops, you know, if they get smelly. So I laid out the outfits on the bed, took a photo, and then created an album in my iPhone called Cruise.
And that way I could just see what matched with each outfit, what jewelry I was going to wear, earrings, shoes, the whole nine. The whole ensemble. It was so easy. And there's another tip that I'm going to talk about.
Yeah, because the trick about this, and we've kind of launched into it without really explaining it there's a theme every single night so for example there was a 007 theme there was a glow night glow night bds no it was monster monster and fetish so some people dressed up in like halloween costumes and other people were just in leather and bondage gear right um but your crews will have different themes and so every night we'll have some kind of a theme for people to rally around and have specific costumes for and we had a blast oh my gosh with it so fun and we didn't go crazy with it we had some of this stuff or we've repurposed things that we'd done before.
Like glow parties are very common in our area, and we've been to several of them, and we've started accumulating outfits and accessories for these kinds of events. So for us, it was really easy to get some of this stuff together. So for your theme outfit, we'd kind of put all of this stuff together ahead of time because we, for a couple things, I needed some pieces that I didn't have for costume. There was a uniform night, for example, and I didn't have shorts that I wanted to wear.
So I ordered some from Amazon, which were these very tiny, sexy, sexy lace up over the crotch yeah like almost like a kind of reminded me of like a football they were kind of like football pants yeah but they were short very short sexy yeah so theme outfits you you should describe what your tip is for next year because you learn something after you did all this and you're going to try on this next year.
And by the way, while Ed had to put together things that he had in his closet and he only had to add a few accessories, I went a little hog wild and I got myself on Fashion Nova and I like shocked the heck out of it and found some fabulous very inexpensive outfits just be aware check the sizes because sometimes they don't quite fit the way you want them to anyway i coordinated all the shoes jewelry necklaces all the other stuff you know what, how I'm going to have my hair with that outfit. I laid it out on the bed and then I put it in a nice jewelry travel case.
But next year, it was a pain in the butt, like undoing everything and repackaging back in there. next year I'm just gonna get these little tiny bags and i'm gonna just put pin them to the outfit that way the necklace the earrings the rings whatever bracelet is all together in a little tiny bag pinned to the outfit then i just dump it out and i dump it back in because i don't have time to like coordinate and attach everything back into the finding it in the little attache yeahe. Yeah. It was just a little bit too annoying. I like to be organized, but that was a little too annoying for me.
I got things to do. This cruise was super fun. And the least thing you want to do is be in your room too long. Exactly. And that's the one advice that we had, or that was the takeaway that we had at the end of ours, which was we spent way too much time in our cabin. Well, most of it was sleeping. Some of it was sleeping and napping. But kind of the preparation and getting ready kind of stuff, we'd like to cut that down. Because I think we missed some valuable time hanging out with people.
But to help with that, one of the other things that we're going to recommend for cruises is keep it simple. Sexy and very little clothing and shoes goes a long way on a cruise. Oh, yes. The long and short of it is there were a lot of people who spent most of their time up at the pool. And it it was naked except for when we were in port. So when you're in port, you have to have clothes. Once you're three miles out to sea, everything comes off. And I can tell you, having walked through that pool area for five days, no one was wearing any clothing. Well, very few.
There were some people who wore clothing for, for those who are a little bit more shy or demure then they would wear something here's why we sail on virgin it's adults only no kids screaming at breakfast no family buffet lines just champagne at noon late night pool parties and people who actually want to be there. The vibe? Think boutique hotel that happens to float. Tattoo parlors, drag brunch, restaurants you'd actually pay for on land. Plus, when you're looking to connect with other couples who know how to have fun, let's just say Virgin attracts a very specific type of adventurous.
No wonder Breadcruisers here, just your people. Or like that bathing suit that they just spent $50 or $80 on. There is that too.
But for the most part part people were topless or naked right and just having a blast yeah everybody was dancing having fun and it was not a big deal so if you consider that this is for the most part a nudist event people who enjoy being naked you don't need clothes for that nope a swimsuit maybe a cover-up just to get back and forth down through the halls some flip-flops and whatever you're wearing for the evening and that's it and if you got if you're on a day excursion shorts and a top or whatever you're wearing to the day excursion absolutely so ours was in a in the caribbean and so the weather was in the 75 to 80s.
And so, you know, nice, breathable shorts, clothing, something like that for the excursion. If you're doing something a little bit more adventurous, plan accordingly.
we did scuba diving which was an adventure in and of itself um the we wore some uh sun shirts to basically cover up our our skin so that we didn't get burned because the worst thing to have happen is get sunburned oh yeah on a five-day cruise which we saw some people doing we don't recommend it so we've we've covered the excursion we've covered the bathing suits uh one thing that was on our boats which we't know, was there were robes in our cabin. So we didn't even need to bring robes, which was great.
The theme night stuff, you've covered shoes, basically heels, men, something to walk around on the excursions, something to dance in, and flip-flops. And that was pretty much it.
oh and of course if you're going to play in the playroom and you like in uh and flip-flops and that that was pretty much it the um oh and of course if you're going to play in the playroom and you like to entice and maybe offer a little bit of uh concealment before the unwrapping lingerie and and there were lots of women who wore lingerie yes even at the pool oh yes so it was pretty common to see women walking around in really amazing outfits and or lingerie all over the ship i know yes it was so cool we were sitting in the buffet one day and this woman walks by in this tight little knit red red.
Well, it really wasn't clothing clothing it was more of like an orange bag in terms of just being stretchy messy lacy yes oh delicious anyway lots of body beautifully yeah beautiful body lots of fun so let's talk let's talk about the first day on the ship and and what your experience was on that first oh yes so i i had been on one cruise before i will admit it was years ago probably good 15 years ago and and i honestly i don't remember a lot about it other than a few uh things about the entertainment on the ship and the excursions but I never remember boarding the ship like this particular ship and I realized that each cruiser is different on what they offer you some people drink some ships will offer drink packages that are included some some are not included, some offer this premium package.
It's all different. There's quite the array. Our ship offered your basic beverages if you wanted anything special, like a fancy coffee or a smoothie or a mixed drink.
Well, I'm sorry, there was an intermediate package for like special coffees and smoothies maybe i don't really know because i didn't buy the drink package and then you buy a drink package for alcohol the drink package for alcohol was 75 a day per couple and you couldn't share person i'm sorry per person couldn't share which which we figured out was about the drink was uh ten dollars a drink or nine dollars a drink you'd have to drink eight you can do the math about eight drinks a day to get your money's worth we've never drank eight alcoholic beverages in a day and we weren't sure how the pour was going to be so we thought we are going to wait to see how generous these bartenders are and what kind of alcohol they're going to have on the boat before we buy the package right because at the end of the week for two people that's an extra 750 and we're like oh my god yeah that was almost a that was almost one of the plane tickets yes almost well more of that a little bit more but yeah yeah so we we get on the ship they they are there are people asking you to you know book your dinner reservations for specialty restaurants there was a sushi on five so they had like naked sushi and special special sushi sushi restaurant there was a cuisine restaurant So it's like a 3d dining experience there was I think another steakhouse type of restaurant and we decided not to partake in any of that based on some other reviews that we we had heard of that the food was just okay so we thought well we'll save a few bucks and we won't do that so we weren't signing up for that we had already signed up for our excursion ahead of time because we were told that was a good thing to do and so we bypassed all those people which was fine they handed you a glass of champagne but then the people with the drink package were constantly bombarding and bombarding and bombarding, bombarding.
So what this ship, we realized quickly that they were making a lot of money on the drink package. And they were doing a lot of hard selling and constantly interrupting and asking. And for me, it was very unpleasant. So I had to go find a quiet place on the ship because after 30 times being asked, it wasn't my favorite experience of getting on the ship.
Once we got on the ship, we met a lot of the staff, the cruise personnel that were there to facilitate individuals wanting to sign up for excursions drink packages and the specialty restaurants so you have an opportunity to do that at that time or right before the cruise right we decided to do some of that before the cruise online so that we didn't have to do that at that time or right before the cruise right we decided to do some of that before the cruise online so that we didn't have to do that at that time so we bypassed all those individuals they gave us some champagne and then we headed off to go have fun and explore the ship right and one of the reasons why we chose to do something to to book one of our excursions ahead of time was one of the other excursions in one of the ports that we were going to be and we're going to be in I don't know.
And one of the reasons why we chose to do something to book one of our excursions ahead of time was one of the other excursions in one of the ports that we were going to be in. We were going to be in Belize. There was a clothing optional snorkeling expedition, and it was on a catamaran, and it sounded like a lot of fun, but it sold out. Yes.
And so we decided before the other one sold out that we were going to book it ahead of time because we want to do something on one of the shore excursions so we did we booked a scuba excursion and it was it was great i'm glad we booked it ahead of time because it it kind of took the worry out of it we didn't have to manage any of that stuff once we got on the ship but you can purchase or manage your excursions and these other packages that they have available once you arrive on the ship. Hey there, podcast listeners.
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Trust this is where the magic happens see you there patrons you can also do it after you're off the ship but it's not ship facilitated so right in other words non-cruise sanctioned events and excursions right and the cruise sanctioned events and excursions guarantee that they will get you back to the ship on time and since this was our your first cruise and i hadn't arranged that on my prior cruise i didn't want want to mess around. I don't want to get left behind. And the cruise lines will also tell you that they've vetted these excursions and the companies that are running these excursions.
Yes. Which is also a little bit of peace of mind. And they actually give you a little bit of a warning about doing things from expeditions or these excursions that aren't affiliated with the cruise line because they can't guarantee your safety. So they kind of give you this little scary warning speech about, right, bad things can happen to you. Anyway, all that being said, best thing to do, there's plenty of excursions.
You can book it through the cruise, just either take care of it ahead of time or do it through the cruise line and it's easy it's really simple and i there wasn't a marked cost difference between correct the the two different ways of booking excursions and so we just did ours through the cruise it was just easier the reason why you'll wander onto the ship is you won't have your baggage or access to your Thank you.
the reason why you'll wander onto the ship is you won't have your baggage or access to your room or access to your room these cruise ships dock and within what did we figure out it was like four hours yes they turn these boats back around and get them out so everybody disembarks all their luggage is taken off the next people come on and all of their baggage comes on they clean the rooms they prep them and they bring the luggage to the room in four hours fifteen hundred couples in four hours it could have been eight but i it maybe it was four but it was fast because even eight is because they disembark at eight at 8 a.m we have to be out of our rooms at eight and you can't board until 11 yes right so they're moving people on and off it's insane it's food it's alcohol it's luggage it's it's everything it's quite the ballet it's amazing in terms of getting all this stuff on so with that in mind you won't have your luggage you basically give that to them they run it through their security checks they run it through the the scanner just like at an airport you're going to check your bag but the bag checking process goes on to these these little shuttles the staff for each floor grabs the bags and they wheel them up outside of your room and they just they just prop your bags up outside your room so you will want to bring on with you a carry-on just like on an airplane with essentials so if you want to hang out at the pool or you just want to explore the boat you can figure out what you need to bring maybe some sunscreen cover up swimsuit and because you're in port you have to wear a swimsuit so that's right don't get all naked that's right they won't like that that's right so it's pretty simple now one of the other things that they gave us, which we were dumb and we didn't pay attention, they gave us a gift bag.
And it was a nice little carry-on bag, little satchel thing. It's like a grocery bag with a bunch of stuff in it. Some of it was brochures for other trips. Some of it was advertising. But most importantly, this particular cruise had a book it was a printed book it's absolutely fabulous we'd gotten a pdf version of it before the cruise and we'd forgotten that they were going to hand them out we had it in our luggage the whole week and it wasn't until we got home where we started looking through wow is really cool. I wish we'd read this before. Like I said, it was dumb.
Knowing that, we're informing you. Read the manual. It's right there. They're going to give it to you. It's really cool. They give you all kinds of tips and tricks. They describe the itinerary.
There's a, I guess we're going to get into the itinerary, the daily itinerary there's a i guess we're going to get into the itinerary the daily itinerary later but read the gift bag go through it see what's in there yes great tip the other thing that will occur prior to you getting to your room i think it happened prior to you getting your room or right after you're allowed to go to your room they all announce it by deck yeah they have to make sure that everyone's on the ship first before they do this yes they call it a muster drill it's an emergency drill you it's a safety training that you you watch a video you listen to someone speak and you learn about how to get off the boat in an emergency you're absolutely required to go if you do not go they will hunt you down i'm not kidding oh yeah international maritime law requires all passengers to participate in the mustard drill i almost didn't want to go i'm like they won't know and we went and they called your number like if you didn't if you weren't oh they scanned your card on the way they scanned your card on the way in and they called your name and if you were not present they went and found you yes and we've we've actually heard some horror stories after the fact where if you don't show up to these things and they can't find you on the ship they assume you fell overboard and bad things happen yeah we knew someone who actually got kicked off the boat because they delayed the ship yes so long and short of it is go to the mustard drill it's simple it's fun they they make it a little bit of entertainment because it is kind of a dry event but they don't want to reenact the titanic so they want people to be able to get off the boat safely in the event that you hit an iceberg not that there's any icebergs in the the tropics caribbean but yes bad things do happen and sometimes they want you to be prepared exactly lastly uh the first well we have this as on the first day of ship but you on this cruise we discovered that you'll find you'll find swingers you'll even find some non-swingers it may not be a high percentage but there are people on there that just like that sexy environment and they're thinking about swinging but they haven't gotten there yet right we'd actually met a couple that that had this was their third or fourth swinger cruise and they haven't they didn't swing with anybody not swingers at all not at all but they were just entertaining the idea they're warming up to it perfectly fine you'll have couples who are there together that aren't couples couples that they're like just roommates they're showing a room they don't play together but they shared a room but they go to each event as a couple or they go to each play room that requires you to be a couple right and then they'll play you won't play with each other obviously because they're not there other.
They're there, but they're not. So you'll find some bi people. I don't know if we found any lesbian or gay people there. No, but we did meet a lesbian couple after the cruise at one of the after parties.
And they will be on the next two cruises that we're going to be on, which we're really looking forward to they were amazing people very very sweet lovely women so fabulous personality leave funny and entertaining you just energetic personalities that you just want to cling to which really brings home the point that there are fun people on these boats yes and regardless of whether their lifestyle or not they're just fun everybody's there to have a good time and i've heard this about cruises this was my first crew so i didn't know what to expect but i'm hooked i loved it i loved the experience and i loved all the the amazing people that we met on that ship next thing we're going to talk about is room service it's amazing they're the the attendants that service your room are very attend attending right they they're on it they're on it i swear they have like the sixth sense or there's cameras or sensors of when you leave your room but they they always know, they time it perfectly, and they make your bed, and they turn down your bed, and they're always fresh towels, there's always fresh linens, your room is always spotless, and I just loved it, and we, some people will tip their, their attendant daily, it's not required, it's nice, especially if you're asking them to do extra things for you like bring you extra hangers bring your extra towels bring you take your laundry serve you know laundry to service we tipped our attendant at the end right yeah and it's uncanny like it's almost freakish because we would literally like go get something at the buffet we would come back and our room would be cleaned it's like magic it was like i said a bit freakish it was fantastic but amazing all at the same time they had this stuff timed down the other thing that they provide in your room each day is a daily itinerary and that comes in the evening i think usually the night before i think the attendant will bring that to you and put that on your bed after they do the turndown service right or when they do the turndown service and the daily itinerary something to to pay attention to so if there's been any changes in the schedule so that the book that we talked about that we didn't read it has an outline of everything that's going to happen during the week but there are changes sometimes there are last minute changes and there's more specific time schedules in this daily itinerary now the itinerary is great because you can plan out your day the night before and go oh great there's a there's a seminar or there's a class or there's a pool party or there's a meet and greet that we want to go to and what time is it?
And so you basically plan out your day and we circled the things that we wanted to go do. And we kind of had a better sense of where we needed to be at different times of the day. And it was fantastic.
It let us not have to worry about trying to get to places because we knew ahead of time where we were supposed to be and since you mentioned meet and greets yes those are very valuable to go to if you can you you may not be able to go to all them because some of them are going on at the same time or some of them are going on at the end of the week and maybe you did a bunch of them at the beginning of the week. So I would encourage you to go. It's a great opportunity to meet other people without a lot of music and a lot of other fanfare and distractions going on. They've got so many of them.
This particular cruise had the under 45 and over 40.
You one was an under one was an over 45 they had the non-swinger group they had the latin group the asian group french group just ladies uh the kinky group the sober and sexy group and the fun full versus soft swap group additionally there were three sex sessions offered and called a speed dating it was a couple speed dating we actually tried to go to one of them but they filled up so quickly and we were 15 minutes early for it that we weren't able to attend now we've done some speed dating stuff before with at a different event in costa rica and it was fantastic it was super really fun because it's not random they they facilitate it they force you to move from couple to couple and so it kind of pushes you outside of your boundary without feeling like you have to push yourself so speed dating absolutely recommended it's fantastic it a lot of fun.
And you get to meet people who you may not have actually gone up to meet before because they just didn't look like someone you wanted to go meet. But you learn something new about these people. And you may go, actually, they're kind of fun. I wouldn't have approached them.
But now that I've met them, I like and i'll i'll hang out with them or i'll look for them again they're fun it's a lot of fun except for the random guy in the speed dating in costa rica that kept asking me about my fantasies and he wouldn't give it up and i this is really annoying and i couldn't wait to move on to the next person your mileage will vary but we still recommend speed dating yes food oh my god so much food so much availability of food so i didn't gain any weight with all that alcohol that i drank it was amazing well we didn't drink that much that honestly but the food was available almost 24 hours a day yeah Yes.
The buffet was open all the time. There were times where they had shut it down, where they were kind of refreshing the food or switching from breakfast to lunch or something like that. But they always had like this small little section of just like snacks. Absolutely. So there really was always something, even when they were refreshing the food over. Yeah.
So we the specialty dining places which are regular sit-down restaurants uh semi-formal if you will napkin fork whatever and then there's the buffet but there's also a dining room which is not extra it's included with the package and there's some pros and cons to those two different ways of eating. The dining room versus the buffet. So in terms of seating, this is the first kind of pro and con. In the dining room, they pick where you're going to be seated. Now, if you come in with a group, they will seat you all together.
If you don't come come in with a group you're going to be in a random group that could be good that could be bad it's random so it's a blind date with people who you've potentially never met before right we'd heard from a couple that got seated with a group that was much older than them and they felt a little bit out of place we happened to be with a group of people who we knew and so we when we attended the dining room we were all sitting together for most of the meals yes so we didn't have that issue but i could see how it could go either way it could be a lot of fun you may be seated at a table of just crazy fun people that you wouldn't have met otherwise.
And you're forced to sit together with them at dinner. And they now have met you. And who knows what's going to happen after that. Now, the buffet, you control your own seating. You wander through the line. You pick up a plate. You load it up.
And then you can scan and peruse the dining area which is just a bunch of random tables and you pick your own target yep i like that the buffet was nice you do you shop for your food and then you shop for your people exactly and we we met some great people at the buffet and we had some good good times with that now the other thing to consider is time so the sit-down dinner the dining room it opens at a particular time and it closes at a particular time and everyone is shuffled in all at the same time and so it's like a restaurant where you can end up having to wait half hour 45 minutes to be seated if you're in for a sit-down dinner where you want the full you know salad fork dinner fork butter knife regular knife spoons dessert three-course meal thing then definitely do it our recommendation go early if it opens at six show up at six because if you wait you're going to be at the end of the line with everybody else we got there early with our group each time and we were seated fairly quickly like we walked in the wait staff actually lines the corridor as you walk in and greet you as you come in it's actually kind of fun experience once you everyone's seated then they're all running around being crazy wait people so you don't get that experience we saw that that was fun but even then you still have to kind of wait just like a restaurant for every else everyone else to be seated, for food to be brought out.
It comes in different phases. And so there can be a bit of a wait. It's usually about an hour to two hours to sit down and eat and then leave. And that includes dessert. And that includes dessert. Like I said, it's usually a three course there's usually a right an appetizer or a salad beforehand there's a main course and there's a dessert right they offer coffee and of course wine or any alcoholic beverages that you would like whether you have the package or not so that's available the buffet on the other hand, you control it. You walk in.
It's fast to pick up whatever you want, as fast as you can walk around and grab whatever you want. And you have the flexibility to stay there as long as you want or as short as you want. there's a couple other tricks with the buffet that we found out there's usually a special spot at the back of the buffet which offers a steak or an omelet bar we didn't know about this until probably about halfway through the week turns out in the morning there's an omelet bar and they'll actually make you custom omelets so instead of the prepared food you get custom food which is.
And with breakfast, they offer steak, but it's usually just pre-cooked. For dinner, though, you pick the exact slice of meat that you'd like, how well you'd like it cooked, and they cook it for you right there. It's kind of cool. So if you're a big steak eater, not a bad way to go. You basically get a custom steak to order, and you're not eating in the typical buffet fashion, which is like a heating tray of food. The food was great at the buffet. There was Indian food. There was desserts. There was always a selection of desserts. We weren't big on the desserts, but there's always fruit.
There's always bread. There's cheese there's various meats there's there's all kinds of different ethnic foods and usually there's a theme that they offer but there's usually several kinds of things going on all at the same time so even if the main theme is mediterranean they'll also be kind of complementary or or opposing meal choices available at the same time. So much good food. And like I said, it was great for us because we got to nibble a little bit when we were hungry. We didn't have to overeat. It wasn't like we had to eat three times a day.
You know, when we were hungry, we would have some food. The other thing that the ship offered were demonstrations and classes. There were fun classes about the G-spot.
There was a class on erotic massage there was a blowjob workshop and a sexual energy workshop and one of the classes well it wasn't really a class was like a private appreciation party for signing up with you know one of the travel agencies and so they had this appreciation event and so you got some free alcohol and we they had two lovely ladies laying on this you know nice chaise lounge and they had a variety of candies strategically placed all over their body so that you could, you know, nibble candy off their body, which was super fabulous. Super sexy. Lots of fun. I know.
So there's a lot of classes and demonstrations that you can go to. We didn't go to any of them, but we had heard some really wonderful things. We did go go to one class and we may actually contact them later to see if we could do an interview with them it was a very interesting class about approaching and and basically meeting couples and and how you go through that process and it was great we learned a couple things but it seemed it was it was more like a meeting new couples 101 kind of a class. And it was a great class. I'm sure a lot of people learned something from that.
But the important thing to take away from this is there's lots of different things to do on the ship.
So if you don't like to hang out by the pool and you're very educationally minded or or you want to expand your horizons there's probably a class for it yes one of the ones that we missed out on which we regretted was a squirting class which would have been so much fun we'd heard stories about it afterwards and we realized that we could have gone there and had a lot of fun in that class because well phoebe's a bit of a ringer for that class right and we would have had fun just hosing people down anyway that was later in the playroom yeah oh so pool parties and games so one of the other things that happens on a regular basis there's a pool on ship many pools so many pools and depending on the size of the ship there are one or more pools right this particular ship had one pool it was a smaller ship but there were hot tubs pools and a dance area right next to it and basically a wooden deck surrounding the whole thing and there was always something going on there they did some of the nighttime theme parties outdoors at the pool but they also just had activities going on oh that's true the solarium was also a pool oh that's right yes so there were there were some party games there going on and different groups would kind of host these pool parties and they'd have these fun games now what was fun was there's usually a food area there there's music playing so there were like hot dogs Thanks for listening.
parties and they'd have these fun games now what was fun was there's usually a food area there there's music playing so there were like hot dogs and hamburgers being cooked it was like an outdoor barbecue thing kind of like a beach party yeah oh yeah and lots of people like i said naked dancing around the pool having a good time and vendors on the. There was body painting. There was a lot of stuff going on at the pool. Toys, jewelry, nipple jewelry, all kinds of fun stuff. Great stuff. Just lots of fun to be had there. There were some games that happened.
One of them was a balloon inflating contest, but it was a pump, and there was a men's version and a ladies' contest going on, and basically they had to grip the pump between their knees and stroke the pump to inflate these very long, curly balloons, and the person who inflated it the fastest and popped the balloon won the contest yes was fun to watch but it was also fun to participate in because these people were actually competing for prizes like legit prizes yeah like 750 off of a hito trip kind of prizes yeah we found out late that would have been fun to participate in but we didn't know about the prize part the prize part and we didn't know about how you entered into the contest i don't know if they just picked people at random or or what but we watched one of these contests they were hilarious they were a lot of fun one guy broke his pump another lady was amazing at what she was doing i don't know where she learned her technique but it was it was fabulous super fast and the the other thing that i'll point out about the pools is that they drain them nightly so if you're worried about the cleanliness of the pools they drain them and they clean them every single night and they refill them now they're salt water pools so they don't have that chlorine harsh harshness to them you you probably need to rinse your suit because it's got salt water in it but it's not nearly as bad as chlorine and they're fairly warm because there's they're heated and they're up on this top deck, and lots of people are in them.
So much fun at the pool. Oh, my goodness. Yes. So one of the other things that you may want to consider is figuring out how to approach others. Maybe come up with an elevator speech, something that's going to allow a quick introduction and let individuals know who you are, where you're at in your, you know, lifestyle and, you know, what you're into. And Ed came up with an elevator speech for us.
We didn't actually have the opportunity to opportunity to use it we this was one of the things we read in the book after the cruise and we thought oh my god this would have been perfect yes well and we already have somewhat of kind of an elevator pitch because we've approached a number of couples we we've we've kind of got some of this stuff down already, but this is a really good technique for cutting to the point and not either wasting your time or someone else's time if you're not on the same page. so here's an example hi we're ed and phoe.
We love couples for soft and full swap, and she loves ladies too. We thought you looked like a sexy couple and wondered if you'd like to get drinks and chat in the martini bar. So it states who we are, what we're into, and there's a closing statement. And that is, this is what we're offering. You can join us or not. Exactly. It's non-threatening. It's direct. And it basically sets you up to either move forward or to move on without taking a whole lot of time.
So an elevator pitch is something that you could throw at somebody while you were riding down in the elevator or just in that amount of time yeah so the the irony is there's actually several elevators throughout the ship and they were great places to run something like this because you're always running into new people in the elevators we met some very sexy people in the elevators and some people who didn't necessarily meet our tastes but great opportunity to meet new people I don't know. I don favorite part. I couldn't wait to get to this part.
This ship had a lot of playrooms um this ship had oh my goodness i think there were four total i think so it was the one they called the fetish theater oh five continue yes they had the conference room which sounded really boring we did there. The solarium, which we spent all of our time there. The rooftop, aft and forward. So that's five. Five. So the Fetish Theater was a no clothing restriction. So you could be clothed or unclothed. It didn't matter.
It was literally literally on the stage they had furniture they had you know bondage rack they had st andrew's crosses they had benches beds tie downs whips chains anything you want so they had staff on there to to fulfill your fantasy also to teach on how to use toys safely and with, you know, with your partner in a safe and, you know, fun environment. Exactly. Mentors, if you will. Exactly. So we went down and we observed that for about an hour one evening and it was exciting. It wasn't really our thing, but it was exciting. Yeah, there weren't that many people participating.
But the thing that actually kind of drew us into the theater was as we approached the doors to the theater, we hear this very pronounced. It wasn't even faint. It was very pronounced woman enjoying herself. Having, but sounded like an orgasm. For an extended period of time we were like okay this sounds like fun let's go see what's in there and we walked in it turns out she was it she was this was a regular sized picture it movie size theater or or your standard stage production theater for an orchestra etc and she was all the way at the back of the stage.
We were outside, walked all the way down the stairs, all the way down to the front of the stage. And she was at the back of the stage. So the acoustics in this place were fantastic for carrying moans all the way out the door. It was great. It was awesome. awesome very kinky very dimly lit um very comforting in terms of not bright lights or overly harsh lighting so it was conducive to sexy fun it was the conference room turns out there's there were no clothing restrictions.
you could kind of go in with street clothes and observe and i suspect that there was probably an observation area as well as a play area right in there like phoebe said conference room just didn't sound sexy they should have called it something like the forward fuck room or something i don't right but they didn't actually that would have been aft that would have been at the back so they could have called it the back room which would have been very sexy but they didn't they called it the conference room because it was in the conference room i know but it was it sounded very dry i know so we did not go there we didn't go but it was a room where some of the seminars for example the squirting seminar was actually done in that room so we should have gone but we didn't right competing schedules busy sleeping eating fucking i don't know something was going on so let's talk about the rooftops first before we talk about the solarium yes that's where we spent our time right and the we went to one of the rooftops.
Never found the second one. Didn't find the second one because, like we said, the ship is absolutely massive. We didn't even find the gym on the ship. We brought our gym clothes.
And we went to look for it, but we ended up having so many other things to do, people, things to do, that we just never we just never got there we had plenty of exercise i'll just say that yes we did go up one night i think it was the first night and the rooftop playrooms were nice because they were outdoors so you had the moon and the stars unfortunately there was also a 100 inch very large TV that was bright playing porn which lit the whole place up like daylight yeah and it was very harsh lighting yeah it was it was not sexy at all and there were probably 30 mile an hour winds up on the top deck so cold totally the wrong kind of blow job yeah not what you were expecting not what you were hoping for so clothing optional was perfect up there because anything you were wearing was probably being blown off and we watched we literally watched people leaning sideways trying to get in and out of some of the doors because the wind was blowing so hard anyway so the outdoor play rooms while they sounded fun probably would have been better during the daylight than they were at night but we did hear about people who played up there and they seemed to have a good time so i would say check it out check it out the solarium now our favorite the solarium now the solarium was an enclosed pool and spa and during the day they offered massages and spa treatments once nighttime came around they closed it down they brought in a bunch of beds with with curtains around all the way around yeah so you could have a very private discreet play area but still be in and amongst a bunch of other people who were having fun so you could hear sexy sounds you could see people walking by now the curtains were were sheer semi-sheer and some of the beds were in the darker areas and some were more in the lit areas so of course we chose the more lit very lit very open out in the yes and some of them had like no curtains they were just around the pool correct yeah they were and they were larger beds that were around the pool and those those were fun we played on one of those one night oh absolutely fabulous we could we drew people in who were just walking by because you you do draw attention when you're out on these beds So if you're shy, which I don't understand, but if you're shy, you probably want one of the curtained beds.
Yeah. We, of course, are not. We're voyeurs and exhibitionists, and we love being watched. And we love to pull random people into the lair.
And so several nights in a row we ended up in the solarium and we were on one of the large beds around the pool one night and we did we had random people who walked by we started off as a random person walking by watching two couples on the bed and we were watching them long enough and smiling at them that they said would you like to join us of course we said why yes of course and we did and they were fabulous and we had some great time with that those couples that have very very nice people and the other nights though we were on one of these other beds where there were curtains around it now like i said we're exhibitionists we get our freak on we pull the curtains back we don't need curtains i don't need no stinking curtains so we pull the curtains back we were also in the habit of peeking through to the other beds that were beside us the women can really get away with this i will say that's true you just kind of peek through and you're like i didn't do it but do a little smile smile wink wink and all of a sudden you know a little flirty flirt and next thing you know the curtains are thrown back and what was a twosome became a foursome which became a eightsome yes eight some eightsome.
Actually, let me do the math. Two, four, six, eight, ten, twelve, fourteen. Sorry, there were fourteen people. Yes, because there's two couples on each bed. There were a lot of people. Oh, my. And it was fun. We didn't interact with all the couples. There were only a few of the couples that we interacted with. But we could see everybody because we all threw our curtains back. And that's the hot part right there. That was the when in Rome. It was just like a Roman orgy. It was so hot. So fabulous. There was a little cross-pollination going on here and there. But so much fun.
A little bit of this.
A little bit of this a little bit of that absolutely i know outstanding it it was so good we had so much fun in the solarium meeting meeting random people and just absolutely amazing and and wonderful people uh very nice very sweet very enthusiastic very passionate people yeah that on the last night they were going to close down early because they had to clean up because they had to get everybody off remember the first part of the podcast they turned this whole ship around in like four hours yes so they weren't messing around they basically said look you got to get your suitcases out by eight o'clock the playrooms are shutting down at midnight we're up in the dance party and it's 10, maybe, 9.30, 8 o'clock.
The playrooms are shutting down at midnight. We're up in the dance party, and it's 10, maybe, 9.30, 10 o'clock. And we're looking around, and we're like, these people are all dancing. They're clearly enjoying dancing. Why are we hanging out with them? Because they're not going to get to the playroom in time to have any fun. That's right. So we said, screw these people, or not screw these people. Let's go downstairs where we really want to enjoy the last two hours of our cruise. Oh, no. And we did. So we went down to the solarium and had a blast. Oh, so nice. So much fun. So nice. So much fun.
nice so much fun so so fun the the most important thing to hear and the way that phoebe described it and that is to ask to kind of peek your head through to offer but watch observe and when people will give you the signal it's usually nonverbal communication. Sometimes it's verbal communication to participate. But the important thing is to get consent ahead of time. And we did. We found that the people who were approaching us and we were approaching them, they would always ask first. They would ask permission.
And if you were interested you would join we had one very nice couple offer to have us join them on the bed when we were first wandering around right she was very attractive he was not our cup of tea and so we chose not to play with them but they asked very politely and we very politely declined and that's the important thing with all of this ask first observe and get permission and get consent right and there was one thing i did want to talk about there was one couple on the bed that it was their first event ever first winger cruise first lifestyle event ever they invite he invited us to the bed and she seemed a bit i couldn't at first i thought oh she's just really into him banging her from behind and because she was somewhat non-responsive and we picked up on it we picked up on i was like there's something i just need to be careful and so i you know i was stroking her hair and and there was some conversation about he asked something and um she had her head down a lot she wasn't engaging so i thought okay well she's not real responsive she's not engaging so either she's very in the the moment, she doesn't want to play, or she's shy, or this is a new experience.
So when someone's not responding or giving you straight-out confident answers, there's a reason. And so you just pull back and you respect that space. Absolutely. He was more gung-ho, he was more confident, she was was less confident and later that came out in the interaction and then we pulled back you know got off the bed and gave him their space which which was a really important thing is to be observant and to be engaged with with the people who are around you and look for the non-verbal cues exactly it'll people sometimes will not tell you verbally, but they'll give off signals.
And it's important that you listen to these nonverbal signals and pay attention to what's going on around you. Be observant. People will respect you a lot more and you'll have a better time and you won't end up crossing someone's boundaries and potentially alienating them or even upsetting them and having other problems. Exactly. So we didn't have any problems. We very carefully backed away from them and let them have their fun. But they still kept the curtain open because they enjoyed the experience of watching other people around them.
But it was clear that she wasn't quite ready for that level of interaction right which was great and and we did we we were very respectful of that and uh i think they ended up having a good time as a matter of fact we contacted them afterwards and they did they they told us they had a fantastic time and it was great meeting us and we've kept in touch so two final things about this and that is the cleanliness so everybody's of course worried about bodily fluids we've all heard the the uh horrible urban legends about adult theaters these play areas are meticulously kept as a matter of fact as soon as a couple's done and they're up off the bed staff is like yeah it's like on it like it's like honeybees on on the hive they're just in there they have stripped the bed rubber gloves squeegees the whole deal they've cleaned it thrown down new sheets ready to go for the next couple yes they're fast they're efficient and it's really really clean when you walk into the room there's towels available and there are clean sheets on the beds at all times.
Amazing staff, and they did a fantastic job. Some of these people are—actually, some of—I think all of them are volunteers in some fashion or other for the ship. But great crew. They also provide lube, condoms, and there was water provided to you. Correct.
And usually it's like a dispenser with like water cups yes paper cups so you can you can drink water which is great um the other thing i'll point out is they give you a bag for your clothing so some of the clothing some of the rooms are clothing permitted the solarium that we were in uh you had to be in a towel or lingerie you couldn't be in street clothes yeah and they gave you a bag so that you could stow all your clothes and you can carry them very nice now we also bring with us our own preferred lube so if you have sensitivity issues or you like a particular type of lube or you need a particular size of condom bring your own because they'll usually provide the average condom.
Um, if you, if you need a larger model, you'll probably want to bring your own. Um, otherwise they usually will provide condoms there, but I still recommend bringing your own because there's all kinds of things that happen with condoms and there's preferences with them. There's non-oxinol nine, which some people are irritated by. I'm sensitive to. Latex versus non-latex. Yes, you've got those. So we tend to carry everything for everybody. But we also bring chapstick. And breath mints. Because we like to be prepared. Yeah. You never know. And I love my chapstick.
So if you can't tell, we highly recommend Bliss Cruises and all of the education, entertainment, and sexual opportunities to meet other like-minded people. We had a fantastic time on our first Lifestyle Cruise, and we hope that this podcast will help you prepare or inspire you to have your own adventure at sea. Woohoo! Yay! 2020, November. Can't wait. Oh my gosh, so excited. Thank you for listening. Thank you for joining us for this episode and listening to Ed and Phoebe at Swinger University.
Please send us comments, or if you would like to share a personal story, we would love to hear from you. You can contact us via email at swingeruniversity at gmail.com. Oh, one last thing before you go. If this episode helped you in any way, the single best thing you can do to support the show is leaving a rating and review. It takes a seconds and helps new people find us when they're searching for relationship education. And we've made it easy. Visit swingeruniversity.com forward slash review. All the instructions are there. Thank you for being part of this community we'll see you again soon
