Better Late Than Never

Transcript

Speaker1: Okay, so if I plug this in here, that's what happens, then you get, no folks, I'm not talking about sex here. We're talking about how to make a podcast.
Speaker2: hello everybody welcome to the first episode of the my secret seduction podcast i'm jay and i'm s and we are what you call some late bloomers when it comes to the lifestyle we've been doing this now for about two and a half years and we are in in our mid-50s. Yes, we are. Yes. Can't believe that we took this long, did it? Well, to be fair, we talked about it for a long time, but it just took us a while to finally say, let's give it a go. Took us a long time. I think it also took us a while to be secure with not each other. I think more ourselves. Yeah.
Speaker1: Maybe both. Maybe a little of both.
Speaker2: Okay. All right.
Speaker1: Cause I mean, you know, and I know you get annoyed sometimes and a little embarrassed. You say we've been talking about, we've been like planning things for a long time and then someone backs out. That's true.
Speaker2: You know,
Speaker1: either you or me,
Speaker2: whether,
Speaker1: whether it's an arrangements I make with another guy so we can have a threesome or you trying to talk me into hooking up with this other girl and you um it just never seemed to work out or there was that one party where the girls all started getting naked and you were like we're leaving and i'm like things might happen that's true you know but we always talked about it we always talked about our fantasies and what would be hot in terms of you being with guys or me being with other women and what we hope to see. So what was it that finally, you know, for us brought us around to this decision to dive into the lifestyle? Well, I think it was a couple of things. I think we had just come out of COVID. We had been kind of, you know, not doing much of anything for a long time. Even before COVID. Even before COVID, but COVID really kind of turned us into hermits. Yes. And our kids were getting bigger and older and not needing us around that much. And I think we just got to the point where we were like, well, it's now or never. If we're going to do something, we're going to do something. And it actually started with a dare that you gave to me. You dared me that I wouldn't have the nerve to go to a clothing optional beach. That's right. And I took you up on the dare and we went and I stripped all the way down and was very happy to be completely naked on the beach, much to your shock. Much to my shock. And I don't think I ever asked you this. When it comes to being naked like that, because there's other times I've suggested, let's get naked in certain things. And you're like, not now, not here. When we see other people people doing it what was it there that worked for you i think it was just it was just a beautiful day and there were other people that were naked and it just i don't know i just didn't feel pressured or i didn't feel like anybody i didn't really even feel like anybody was looking at. It was just kind of like just natural to do it. And it didn't really make a difference whether I was naked or not. And we've been back to that Clothing Optional Beach numerous times ever since. Yes. We sure have. And have had a great time. But there's a big leap between going and being on a clothing optional beach to actually going into the lifestyle.
Speaker2: Correct.
Speaker1: But that was kind of the turning point for us because we enjoyed it so much. And then we started saying, well, there are resorts we could go to that are clothing optional. We started looking into Hedonism 2 as an option to go and thought that could be fun and started to read know read up more on the lifestyle and getting you know interested in in what that could be like but then i think it was me that might have said well i don't want to go to hedonism and not have ever had any kind of experience at any kind of a club i felt like it would be just too overwhelming to go as complete newbies and we started looking into local clubs local yep that local local as in like local as in within like three hours of us right you know not much up where we are we were willing to travel like through a state maybe even up to two yeah to do it right you know based on where we're located and such um and you would come up with a bunch of options. There were a few, but they were all roughly between two to three, three and a half hours away. Right. But my one big thing was, oh, there's no hotels nearby. I mean – and when I say nearby, I meant like we could walk even across the street after we were done and go to our hotel room. And I didn't want to be in a situation where maybe I've drank too much, made some stupid choices, because I didn't know what was going to happen. And I didn't want to get behind the wheel. I didn't want you getting behind the wheel. So I was like, we have to find a place with a hotel. So I sat down at the computer. And that's when I came to you and I said, look at this place in Atlantic City. It is a lifestyle – I mean, the best way to call it, it was a lifestyle resort. Yeah. You know? Yeah. A huge old – and it was kind of like an old building in a way. It was an old building. And it had rooms you could stay in that were not great, but did the job. It was nice to crash. Exactly. You know, had a dance floor, had bars, had a beautiful open deck area that was secluded in the sense that nobody could look in with a clothing optional pool. Yep. And it was great. It was a really nice place. Unfortunately, it closed this past year. And this is going to be our first summer since getting into the lifestyle that we won't have this place as an option to go to. Because we used to like to go for the weekends in the summer. And that place? Well, you never mentioned the name. Oh, Saints and Sinners. Saints and Sinners in Atlantic City. Yeah, I know. that that when we went for the final closing and just seeing all the people, I mean, that was the most that place ever had packed was like 800 people showing up for the one final fling at Saints. And what we loved about that place, too, was, well, we love the DJ. We love the staff. DJ Ray Ray. DJ Ray Ray. You could say his name. And the staff, ghost hosts, the hosts of the club, and Ginger, who was a bartender there when we first started. And just the people that went. It was a very, like I would say, relaxed, kind of cool vibe. It wasn't a high-pressure place. But they partied. But they part they partied they had a great time yeah i would say out of all the times that we've been there the 50 50 was what was like as how often we played like half the time we we played at the other half it was just even you and me and sometimes even you and me because we were so tired, we would go pass out. Right.
Speaker2: But, you know, I had downstairs, had like a great big, what they called the red room, which was really cool, was just like a huge room with like a bunch of mattresses, beds. That was nice.
Speaker1: They had individual playrooms on the upstairs.
Speaker2: It was a really cool place. Yeah, it was.
Speaker1: It was. And it was where, you know, our journey began, because we saw it. We were like, all right, this is cool. Did we sign up for the year membership initially? I think so. Okay. So we signed up for it and then we probably made the first mistake. So we decided to go. So now granted, you know, in the summer we went to this clothing optional beach and it took us until around the holidays to actually planned to go out to the club. It was around my birthday. It was for my birthday. My birthday happened to fall on the same night that they were having their big holiday party. We went and we didn't know anybody. We didn't attempt to try and connect with Pete, even though they had a list that you could look and see who was attending they have like an online forum basically they they call it dirty facebook yeah and you could connect with people send messages we didn't think to do any of that so we showed up didn't know anybody and the place was packed and i immediately i'm generally not a big fan of huge crowds to begin with in any situation so. So this huge crowd there in this lifestyle club, I was completely overwhelmed, and basically wanted to hide in a corner the whole night, which we pretty much did. Which we pretty much did, because we didn't, you know, we'd been listening to podcasts, we'd been reading stuff up on the lifestyle. But in the end, the application of what you've read and learned is way different than what you've read and learned. So, you know, us even thinking about walking up to people and going, hi. Yeah. Just to even say hi and, you know. And you've seen – you probably – those of you listening, you've probably seen those people. You may even be them yourself at certain events and parties and you just sort of sit there and you're with your drink and looking around and stuff and it's like now what right so so anyway so we we hung out for a while and then um you convinced me to want to go and go down to the the red room and try it i figured if nothing else you and i would play so we started walking down there and in order to go into the red room you had to be completely naked and so when you get down there they give you a locker they give you a couple of towels and the idea being that you know you have your towel you could bring in with you but and you would think i would have been fine with it because i'd been to the the nude beach but for whatever reason when we started walking down those stairs and i could see in a little bit and i saw people taking off their clothes i had a full-fledged panic attack and i pretty much ran back up the stairs yes oh yeah i'm like i can't do this i can't do this i completely panicked and then i think we went to our room after that we did yeah and you were none too happy with me no you know one of those times where we didn't do anything? We didn't do anything that night because I was none too happy. So, you know, we went, you know, we left the next day. We talked a ton about it on the ride home. Three hours. Three hours. And that's going to be a topic of one of our upcoming episodes is going to be all about communication. But we decided to, you know, we communicated a lot about how we felt and the frustration and the anxiety and all of that and then we decided to give it another try and we did and that was a more successful visit and we'll we'll talk about that maybe on a future podcast maybe the next one but from that point on there was really no turning back for us i mean I mean, we – for the most part. For the most part. We had some hiccups along the way, but – We took a week off.
Speaker2: Yeah.
Speaker1: I mean, like literally, it wasn't like we were having a dry spell. We said, no, we're done, and we were out of it for a week, and then suddenly we looked at each other and went, nah. But it's been a lot of fun. We've, I think, learned a lot about each other and ourselves. We've met some really cool people that we we i feel have become friends with and you know whether we played with them or not and right you know it's been overall i would say a very positive experience and then that has led us to creating our group where we do events called my secret seduction and we've been running that now for about a year. We run them mostly through SLS, but we recently teamed up with another club that we've become connected with that's actually much closer to us called Wicked Fun Club in Terryville, Connecticut. So we had one big event there already, and we've got another one coming up May 9th, our May MILF Madness event. It'll be a Friday night. I mean, what do you think, folks? Fridays or Saturdays? Does it really matter if you want to get out and have some fun? Does the day really matter? Think of the Thursday night game night that we went to at Wicked Fun. And I won't say it was packed, but for a Thursday night, it was a good you know so i mean to me i'm just like it doesn't make a difference the doors don't open till nine anyway so people can come i think we will have a good crowd and it's already starting to shape up that way now so we'll see we'll see i'm a little bit more of the negative negative nelly as as you like to call me yeah i. I'm a little bit more of the negative Nelly, as you like to call me. I tend to be a little bit more of a half-glass-empty type of person.
Speaker2: And I try to be a half-glass-full. Yeah, so.
Speaker1: Yeah.
Speaker2: Yeah. So, we'll see. We'll see. Yeah.
Speaker1: But, okay. Now, speaking of which type of people okay how would you describe me describe you yeah um i never really thought about it before wow well i mean to actually put it into words well i can i can put words because i'll use testimonials from other men who've described my wife as a goddess oh stop who should be worshipped she's a dime i had to look that one up so uh what else was it um I don't know
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Speaker2: I don't know I don very handsome man. I find you very sexy. I also think you are very intelligent and have a great sense of humor and a lot of fun to be around.
Speaker1: I mean, I think that you're the whole package, baby. The whole package. I think so. S here. S here has got the curves. Yeah. So, you know, that's the big thing to take away from this. Because if you like curves, you got S for that.
Speaker2: Yeah.
Speaker1: So, all right. So there's a little bit about us and a little bit about our background. And we'll tell more in the Thank you. Thank you. Bye-bye. you got asked for the for that yeah so all right so there's a little bit about us and a little bit about our backgrounds and we'll tell more in the in the weeks and months ahead as we produce new episodes of the podcast uh what were we thinking about in terms of topics so i think one topic that would be um interesting would be you know basically when you are a late bloomer and you're a little older it's getting started in the the lifestyle. I think that's a little different than people who start a little earlier. Communication, I think, could be a good topic. Very good topic. Very big topic that we – even two and a half years later, you say communication. It's not only just that, even after a while and you feel comfortable enough, don't take it for granted. There should be communication. So we can definitely get into that. Because I think as you are in the lifestyle, you change. One topic I think is another good one would be setting boundaries. But I think boundaries also change. And that needs to be a mutual thing that you need to discuss and not just all of a sudden one day in the middle of a play session, decide to throw a boundary out the window while your partner's looking at you going, what? You mean like I kind of did? And, you know, I think that one thing, and for people who are listening, if you're starting out in this, there's, and even if you've been in it for a while, there's bumps along the road. This is, this is something that that's why communication important because you want to make sure that you're respecting each other and acknowledging each other and understand what the other is kind of feeling and looking for and supporting each other. Right. Right. Exactly. I would totally agree with that. Okay. So one thing we also want to do, because we said this, we have our own group called JNS Explorers My Secret Seduction. All right. My Secret Seduction, we're doing monthly events at Wicked Fun Club. And we've already mentioned our upcoming events, which is the May Milf Madness. If you head on over to wickedfunclub.com, you can sign up for free profile, and then you can get memberships. They range from a day to a year. And, you know, if you just want to come to an event, if you want to come to our event, you can get a day pass, you know, a day pass, I guess you could call it, and come party with us and such. That's Friday, May 9th. Some other events that they're also doing, they've got a murder mystery night coming up where they're actually going to act out a murder mystery among swingers. Someone dies and you have to figure out who did it among the swingers. That's May 17th, Saturday. They've also got an 80s party on the 24th of Saturday. So they're looking for, you know, your best 80s garb. And then finally, at the end of the month, May 31st, knocking boots, cowboys and cowgirls night there. So that's all happening at Wicked Fun. But one other thing we also wanted to bring up are our friends who run a group also on SLS called Paradise Mountain. And they've got a couple of events coming up. If you go over to SLS, they're there exclusively. You can find I don't know. a group also on SLS called Paradise Mountain. They've got a couple of events coming up. If you go over to SLS, they're there exclusively. You can find us on a number of other platforms, but they're there pretty much exclusively on SLS. They have the group called Paradise Mountain. They're out of Pennsylvania. They've got a prom night coming up on May 31st. It's a house party at their home, so you've got got to sort of be vetted by them first any newbies but you know get yourself on the list and reach out to them and they'll talk to you um we've sent a few people their way that they've had a good time so uh maybe we'll see you there because we will be there on that on that night as well i've got my actual prom outfit i didn't buy a cheap uh you know t-shirt that looks like a tux i actually bought a red velvet crushed velvet it looks almost like uh tux it's really cheesy that's and that's one thing i will say about you know the lifestyle and doing this with you i've opened up a lot more yes i dance now yes he dances he never danced before and he will wear like theme outfits whereas i never i don't think there was ever a time where i got you to dress up for even a halloween party a vanilla halloween party nope like maybe once in all the years we've been together so i've been the riddler i've been professor pineapple yep i Dressed in a kilt yep for our saint patrick's day party that we had there yep so so yep it definitely has opened you up a bit it has it has and that's a nice again like you said we change as we go along through the lifestyle we change as people i think for the most part for the better yeah i would definitely say i think i've become a lot more confident you definitely have become, for the better. Yeah. I would definitely say that. I think I've become a lot more confident. You definitely have become a lot more confident.
Speaker2: Absolutely.
Speaker1: You know, from that first time you ran up the stairs and then, you know, some of the things you do now, which we'll talk about. I do nothing. You do nothing?
Speaker2: Yes.
Speaker1: Don't tell them that. Don't tell them that. I am pure. You're pure? Yes, very pure you're pure yes very pure yeah you sound pure you're like ivory snow with a few tire traps wow okay i wasn't going there good lord all right anything else you want to add to this or should we just bring this to a close for our first episode just want to say hope everybody's having a great day and tune in Thank you. All right. Anything else you want to add to this or should we just bring this to a close for our first episode? Just want to say hope everybody's having a great day and tune in again. Yes, tune again. We will be back very shortly. I don't know if this is going to be every two weeks or every month. We'll have to see. Kids are out of the house. So that's what made it perfect to start this up today. But tune in, folks, and thank you so much for listening. You can find more about us on SLS, SDC, FetLife. We're all there and it's all J&S Explorers. So until next time, folks, keep swinging. Keep swinging. thank you for listening you sexy people if you have questions comments or topic suggestions you can email us at jnsexplorers at gmail.com we'd love to hear from you
Speaker2: this has been a My Secret Seduction production.