Send us Fan MailTuesday Talks: First time Hotwife - Clubs or Connection First? | Episode 104In this episode of The Swing Nation Podcast, the top-rated podcast about non-monogamy and swinging, Dan and Lacy are back with another Tuesday Talks, answering a heartfelt question from a listener stepping into the lifestyle for the very first time.After 35 years of marriage, this listener is finally ready to explore her hotwife journey—but isn’t sure where to begin. She shares her desire to connect with a bull on a more personal level, and wonders if a swingers club is the right first step. Dan and Lacy break it all down, explaining why a club environment might not align with what she’s looking for right now, and how intention matters when entering the lifestyle.They offer practical advice on where and how to meet single males, how to vet and build genuine connections, and what to expect along the way. And for those still curious about the club scene, they also share tips on how to make the most of the experience if she does decide to go.Whether you’re brand new or just navigating a new dynamic in your relationship, this episode is all about starting with clarity, confidence, and communication.🎧 Tune in now to hear Dan and Lacy’s advice and take your next step in the lifestyle the right way.Get Tickets to Electric Pleasures- The Swing Nation - Main Website Quick Navigation Website: -- (Find all our social media links more!)- Swinger Society - Our Website to meet, connect events Swinger Society Discord Our Facebook Group- Swinger Websites -Kasadie 90 day free trialUsername: TheSwingNation SDC 14 day free trial Username: TheSwingNation** Use code 36313 for 14 days free! ** SLSUsername: NorthernGuynSouthernGirl- Merch More -Order Your Merch Here!- Lacy’s Fun Links -VIP OnlyFansPREMIUM OnlyFans-- THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS --Wisp : Making sexual healthcare inclusive, cost-effective, and accessible—for everyoneUse Code SWING at checkout for 15% off your oder!Shameless Care: ED Medication and at home STD testingUse Code TSN at checkout for $30 off your order!Promescent® Make Love Longer, It’s Time for Great SexUse Code SwingNation for 5% off!- Thank you for the support! -
Transcript
Speaker1: This podcast is intended for adult audiences. Over the age of 18, it contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us, and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice. Welcome to the Swing Nation podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers, where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle. Come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe. Interview the experts, learn and grow together. Join the nation. Tuesday Talks. Just send your questions to Dan and they say. Tuesday Talks. Swing Nation got you feeling sexy. Tuesday Talks. Talking Tuesday with Dan and Lacey. Ooh, how about that high note? That was perfect. Hey there, pineapple people, and welcome to the Swing Nation podcast. We are your hosts, Northern Guy. And Southern Girl. And we are back with another Tuesday Talk episode. Yeah. Talking Tuesday. With Dan and Lacey. Wacey, the Waysinator. Oh, God. The Wacinator. Oh, my God. She's like the Terminator, but she's with dicks. Okay. The Dickinator. The Wacinator. Okay. Yeah, because you're like, destroy the dicks. I do like some dicks. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, let's just move along.astinator. Let's just move right along here. This week's Tuesday talk comes via text, via text because Lacey left the phone at the house. Yes. And we're trying to get these done. We have a busy secrets is like maybe this week. If you're listening to this, I don't know when this is going to get posted. And then we've got Bliskers right behind it. So we've got to start racking up, saving some files so we can get these out. Because you guys don't want to miss an episode. No. You don't want an episode where you go on YouTube and you're expecting to listen to Dan and Lacey and see our beautiful faces on your TV while you're drinking your morning coffee and have us not be there. They freak out if it does. It's not there. I we go yes um okay so today's question it says hey hi lacy my name is michelle my husband and i are 59 and very fit we have been married 30 hi lacy hi lacy no there's no dan there nope all right next question okay no we have been married i don't even get it i don't even get addressed you pick not even i'm not even part of this conversation i might as well just go sit down somewhere else i'm gonna get up and leave that's fine all right we have been married 35 years together 40 plus and he has always wanted to see me sleep with another man and i'm finally on board we tried to go to a club in dc last year there on business but we left because it was in a very bad area. We live in Florida on the West Coast and have looked into Miami-Fort Lauderdale clubs, but they are very Spanish and we don't speak that. Do you know of any other good clubs in Florida? We have never been with anyone since we've been married. I don't think we would hook up with anyone that night. I'd like to get to know them, but it's a sexy start. Thanks for your help. Just listen to another podcast of yours. Love them. Okay, so. It's a lot to unpack there. A few things. So let's go through it. Married 35, going on 40 years. Yeah. And her husband has always wanted to see her sleep with another man. Yeah. Congratulations on him for being consistent. well and that's not uncommon a lot of people get in the lifestyle because the husbands express they want to see yeah i think it's the top one right it's either the girl is curious about being with other girls yeah that's probably number one but number two is husbands want to see their wives get dicked down by other guys yeah uh you know lots of husbands do like it's more common than you think so before we deep dive into the next part let's kind of talk about that for a second we obviously don't have a ton of time but I think it's worth bringing up because this is something that so many men are into I think a lot of men say they want to see their wives get fucked by another man I don't think they really think about what that means so to to her husband let's talk about that let's have a talk with you you need to be prepared that your wife is going to come in ways that you've never made her come and you're gonna have to be okay with that because nine times out of ten she's she's gonna fucking love it she's going well if just think, just think about this. All right. They've been married 35, going on 40 years or whatever. He knows all of her noises. She probably hasn't had another man touch her for those 35 years, right? So even if this guy. Is mediocre. Doesn't know what the fuck he's doing. Just the excitement of a new guy touching her is going to put her in a different place where she hasn't been in 35 years right and so she might make noises that you've never heard her make she might squirt she might i don't know she might come in ways that you've never seen her and so before you engage in this you need to make sure that your manhood can handle that Because a lot of times we've seen this happen and the man is is not okay because he didn't he he in his mind it's porn right in his mind it's going to look so different but in reality it can it can be a little bit harder to digest yeah i think that's true i think we you don't know what type of jealousy or insecurities you are could experience until it gets triggered right so it's kind of you know this is an emotional state that you're going to be in and sometimes you get triggered and maybe you don't think it right maybe you watch all this hot wife porn and you think it's hot but then seeing your wife actually experience it it could trigger something with inside of you and this is So just be prepared prepared for that right have a safe word have you know something right and this is not to discourage you from doing this it's fucking amazing you know um but just emotionally just to protect you and your heart have a plan for that yeah have a plan for that going into it talk about hey if i get triggered by this experience what are we going to do yeah is there a word i can say is you know maybe even talk to the guy about it like hey we've never done this before i really want to see it i'm really excited but if for some reason i get triggered by it then we're going to say this word and we'll just we'll just all stop and most guys especially if they're an experienced bull have been doing this for a while totally will understand that yeah and if they. Then it's the wrong guy. Finding a better guy. So it sounds like they've been trying to go to clubs. They tried to go to one in D.C. It was in a bad area. Honestly, that's pretty common. Yeah. If you just get through the doors, it usually will be much. Like, for instance, we're going to talk about Trapeze Fort Lauderdale here. It's in a shopping mall. Yeah. It's next door to a pawn shop. If you pulled into trapeze fort lauderdale parking lot and left i would not be surprised yeah it is an amazing club yeah yeah you just got to get through the doors so let me miami velvet kind of similar it's kind of a little bit of a sketch area but great great club most clubs that we have been to from the outside don't look like much and that's kind of on purpose right you know they also have to kind of put them in these spots because it's very hard to put a swingers club you know in the middle of they don't get the best retail property for some for some reason yeah if you go to you know somebody that owns property and say i want to start a swingers club here you know not the most premier real estate rental companies rent to you so if you're wanting to go to a slinger club just know that going in you know don't judge a book by its cover walk through the I'll see you next time. the most premier real estate rental companies rent to you. So if you're wanting to go to a slinger club, just know that going in, you know, don't judge a book by its cover, walk through the doors. I mean, I have been to lots of clubs and know this. And when we pulled into Trapeze Fort Lauderdale, I was like, what the fuck? What is this? But get inside Trapeze Fort Lauderdale. We have a tour video on YouTube. Go check it out. Beautiful club. Honestly, if you're in that area, that neck of the woods, that would be the the one i would yeah so that's her next part of the question is they live in florida where's the best place so yeah she you are correct south florida there is a very like heaven lat latin spanish well welcome to south florida though yeah but trapeze is a mixed crowd though it is they do have latin night they do have so you obviously are going to want to find you go on like a Saturday night. You're going to have a good crowd. Yeah. But I'm going to say this. You sound like you need to get to know the person first. So I don't know if going to a club and just meeting someone and hooking up is your vibe. To me, you seem like you need to get to know somebody and have a good conversation. And it's, you know, and I'm assuming your husband probably does too. I mean, like if I, and I can't speak for your husband, but I know if I had been married to somebody for 35 years, I would have a hard time just like throwing them out to the wall. Not that that's what he's doing, but like, I'd want to like have a conversation when the music's not too loud and where you can talk and you can talk about boundaries and you can talk about protection. When was he last tested? That's kind of the vibe I get from her from reading this. You kind of agree?
And so as somebody that's kind of did this bull thing for a while and, you know, hot wives were kind of my specialty for there for a year or two. My suggestion to you, if you're trying to have your first hot wife experience, which is, that's what we call it. When a female engages with a single male, um, the way I've seen it work the best is, uh, have your husband like get on STC, SLS, Cassidy, uh, you're in Florida. I think that's maybe SLS country, SLS or STC, uh, the swingnet free links or theswingnation.info free links to all the lifestyle websites for free trial uh so get on sls get on cassidy um or i'm sorry get on sls get on stc try cassidy too if you want it's free um and then reach out to a few guys right there's all kinds of single mails on those websites just scroll hit, filter male single male scroll find some hot pictures uh look for guys that have good ratings right so there were two you know a couple other couples have been like this guy's the shit he showed up had a hard dick he was awesome find a couple of those guys that you're attracted to message them uh what you're going to want to do what i would ask to do if i was you is have your husband meet him for a drink just the husband right not even you're not even involved right so just have the husband and i've done this several times well he needs to vibe check right so he needs to look at how you have her look at he knows the kind of guys you're into he knows what you want i disagree but she needs to vibe check you're saying yeah okay either way all right so have your husband meet him or you meet him together no no he can meet him but letting you see the picture like right no no no yeah that's what i'm saying yeah yeah so look at the pictures find a guy that she wants to fuck then have your husband meet him for a drink or if you want to both go out and meet him for a drink some more public and then vibe check in person right so you go out have a drink with this guy or have your husband go out and have a drink with this guy however you're comfortable meet this guy just have a drink you know you don't it doesn't have to be long drawn out just beat him for a quick 30 minutes hour do a little vibe check make sure this guy is not an asshole he doesn't come around as a dickhead he's friendly he's somebody you can trust and respect right and then if that's green then set the date right so that's whether he comes over your house and you and him make out in the hot tub for a while then you go fuck whether you want to meet him out at a hotel whether you want him to pick you up and Thank you. date right so that's whether he comes over your house and you and him make out in the hot tub for a while then you go fuck whether you want to meet him out at a hotel whether you want him to pick you up and bring you to dinner and then bring you back to his place or hotel whatever this like fantasy scenario is for the two of you maybe your husband's watching maybe he's not watching maybe he's on facetime you know whatever the scenario that this fantasy this is your fantasy this is your guys right and the guys are going to try if there's a good bull he wants to give you whatever experience you want right so talk about what how do you want to do this turned on i don't know um this scenario is hot you like this yeah i do like yeah this is this is my life so oh it is whatever it is right so well it was my life so whatever the scenario is if he wants to be there if he doesn't want to be there if he wants to be in the other room if he wants to be on facetime right set all that up and then I'll see you next time. it is right so well it was my life so whatever the scenario is if he wants to be there if he doesn't want to be there if he wants to be in the other room if he wants to be on facetime right set all that up and then make it happen and to me that's going to be your best experience trying to meet some random dude at a club that you talk to over music for five minutes like that's not the idea to me that's not the ideal like hot wife experience yeah i really think for the hot wife lifestyle you do need that little bit a vibe check a connection and have a fantasy night especially when it's so new you know like after you've been doing it for a while you probably can right sure at a swinger club if you're like he's hot hey bro hey guy you want to fuck yeah and you take him back in the room and he fucks the shit out you awesome right but for your first time i think you kind of need to need to be a little bit you need to vibe check it you need to walk your way into it you need to have all the you know safe words and yeah and bug out plans and everything in place um so that's an option i also want to bring up that you are in florida and you're in south florida which i know orlando is not really south florida it's more central not far a weekend at secrets there's also caliente which we've never been to but we've know great things about you know the any one of those you're near hollover beach and you know miami anything like that where you can yeah you being in florida you are like florida and texas are like the two meccas for the lifestyle like you couldn't ask to be in a better place so um our favorite place in florida is secrets hideaway yeah um trapeze would probably be my second favorite caliente we've never been there but i've heard nothing but great things uh in miami velvet really isn't a bad club either um so all lots of great places um but yeah if you want to come to secrets we do takeovers go to these, I'm sorry, swingersociety.net. We're actually going to be there just coming up in like, I don't know if this podcast episode. This will probably come out after. Yeah. But check it out. We're doing one in September. But the cool thing about Secrets is it's a lot, you know, it doesn't matter when you go. Very diverse crowd, especially for takeover holiday weekends. You can hang out in the pool all day with your tits out. You can get to know people. And I would even say, you know, if your husband just wants to see you get fucked, you don't even necessarily have to go find a single guy. Yeah. You can find a cool couple and just say, hey, I really want to see my wife. Right. If you met us in a pool and this was your fantasy and me and you were attracted to each other, Lacey would be like, damn fuck her i mean i've done that to done that with a lot of girls so like uh i'm not trying to like advertise myself but other guys too yeah there's very common for that to happen where married couples will let you borrow their husband and the cool thing about something like a secrets and you know this can be had for like if you choose to go on a bliss cruise or hito or whatever like during the day it's a lot of like laying out in the sun and hanging out and like yes there's music your husband's gonna get to see a bunch of titties like yeah there's music playing but that's a lot of opportunities to really get to know somebody and then like if you hit it off like later that night then you're like dancing in the club and you know then that's those energies are sparking and then you can move on to like a playroom or whatever i mean hell if you hit it off during the day you can say hey we really like you we don't have plans tonight we are going to go to the club for a while but after how do you feel you know so it's like if you're vibing in the pool you can say hey you'll go back to the room real quick like whatever i'm just saying like that's an easier way to kind of make that transition especially when you're newer than it is just like walk into a dark club with clubs are hard i mean clubs are hard you know you don't get there till eight o'clock at night and you're out of there by 2 a.m most couples are fucking 11 midnight you know that's a couple hours yeah right to make that connection to make something happen it's hard it's hard yeah but it sounds like because you've sent us a couple of tuesday talks it sounds like y'all are really trying to like embrace the lifestyle and stuff you are in such a amazing area and it looks like you also travel a lot i would i would encourage you to go to all the clubs yeah you know make them date nights check out caliente i mean if they're they seem like they're maybe they're a little bit of an older couple if like you know club and loud music and edm is not your thing caliente i think is more like chill vibes and stuff like that so yeah you find find your whatever wherever you fit in and yes there especially because you are in south florida there is going to be you know definitely some of that latin culture but there's also going to be every other culture that's what's so cool about it and so you just kind of have to find who you're vibing with and you can even you know find somebody online that you met and then maybe say hey we're going to be at trapeze fort lauderdale if i was her i would check out trapeze first yeah probably the closest if that's not really your vibe go check out caliente if that's not really your vibe go check out secrets yeah i guarantee one of those three places you're gonna you're gonna love yeah and probably multiple of them you're gonna love yeah i agree so yeah that's it so hope that helps um go have a hot wife experience right uh it's it's that time of year right sun's coming out and people are taking their clothes off it's feeling sexy um you know there's no time you guys have been married 30 you've been talking about this for almost 40 years now um you know yeah you're still get it get it in while you're still young yeah uh there's no don't wait you don't have to wait any longer right if you guys are on the same page sounds like you're listening to the podcast you got some good information um set a date on that calendar go check out a club go check out one of the um the resorts or set yourself up a date go go check out sdc sls cassidy uh swingers the swing nation.net or swing nation.info has all the links that you need um to get signed up on those and check them out anything else for the swing nation listeners i think that's it i think that's it uh if you have a tuesday talk question i'd love to hear from you. There's a few different ways to get a hold of us. You can email us at theswingnation at gmail.com. You can send us an email. You can send us a voice note. Or you can send us a video. And we'll play your video on our TV in here. And you can get featured on Swing Nation Podcast's YouTube channel with your question. Or you can call or text, and that phone number is? 972-302-7716. And I was looking through those text messages. There was a lot of dick pictures in there. There is. Some of them were pretty impressive. I feel like I need to see, there needs to be boob or vagina pictures. I feel like it's a little off balance now you're getting too much attention um so send your boob and your vagina pictures to me i'll actually look at are you jealous a little uh no no i just you know i want it to be an equal opportunity um dirty pictures i wanted you to be maybe you have a hot wife and you want to send me pictures of her. Oh, do that. That's hot. Send it to me.
Speaker2:
Do that. For sure. Videos.
Speaker1:
I like videos, little clips and stuff for doing nasty things.
Speaker2:
All the things. I don't think...
Speaker1:
Is this... Can you advertise like this?
Speaker2:
I don't know.
Speaker1:
But I think so. There's no rules here on the Swing Nation podcast.
Speaker2:
All right.
Speaker1:
I think that's it. Anything else?
Speaker2:
That's it.
Speaker1:
All right, guys. In a world full of apples...
Speaker2:
Be the pineapple.
Speaker1:
Be the pineapple, guys. guys bye bye if you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us we have a five star review wherever you're listening if you want to see more of our content you can find links to snapchat twitter instagram only fans and more in the show notes come join the conversation with us and other swinger content creators on our swinger society discord server if you have questions or
Speaker2:
Thank you. instagram only fans and more in the show notes come join the conversation with us and other
Speaker1:
swinger content creators on our swinger society discord server if you have questions or feedback email them to us at the swing nation at gmail.com make sure you head on over to the swing nation dot net and keep up to date on all things swing nation we thank you so much for joining us and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.
