If there is no response, give it a couple of days. Once you make a plan go for option 2, because of radio silence, let the nonresponding couple know right away. If they complain, tell them you were willing to keep the commitment, but never heard back.
Swinging isn’t the most important think in the world to us, so we don’t tend to double-book. If plans fall through I get to have amazing sex with my husband, which... believe me, I’m winning.
If something is tentative, I would keep a hold on it for a couple I know well, but I wouldn’t do it for a couple we just met.
I’m a big fan of loyalty.
If I make a plan I keep to it, but if the conversation is about tentative dates, I say that I'm currently free, but that probably won't last long (because it won't). And if someone waits weeks and I've made other arrangements in the meantime, I apologize and repeat the process.
I'm currently on the hook for tentative plans Saturday night and there's also something that just came up that I actually want to do, regardless of other commitments, so I'm going to try to combine the two things. If Option A objects, I'll pout for about 30 seconds in the privacy of my own head and then go do just the first thing.
When reaching out in anticipation to receive an answer for a repetitive meet, you should politely put in a deadline, ie, blah blah blah blah ....... we really enjoyed your company, spending time with you two and would like to again, yet due to our limited adult time, please let us know before Friday Jan 10th.
~Allen
Okay while we try to make plans well in advance and not waiver between should we do this or that sometimes we have found it is sometimes not working as intended. In the past we or they have not always been available but we have been successful in communicating and working it out with others especially if not doing it at the last minute. We told someone we have met and enjoyed their company on several other occasions we would be available on a couple of Saturdays expecting them to let us know what worked for them if any did. Now one of those dates is coming up and no reply which is okay as the wife has come down with a cold so we decided to simply bow out today since nothing was planned (likely would have anyway or at least warned we might). That being said there is still the future date which we have had another offer for a first meeting. Now we let the other party know we needed to hear something back so we do not miss out on making other arrangements. We feel we "owe" it to them to not just make other plans since we said we were available however we also don't want to miss out on something else because we waited for nothing. The question is how long is appropriate to wait on a response before saying "Screw it lets go with the other plans"? I know this can vary depending upon who is giving the answer but we would love to hear how you would or have handled a similar situation.
BTW we do not want to ruin a good thing simply for a first meet that may not pan out but there is always the what if it does or would have? We never promised an "exclusive" relationship with others in the lifestyle but are not about the numbers either. We simply enjoy encounters with others when we can and as happens schedules do not always match up so being able to move to the next and then coming back later when you can meet up is nice. Thing is that takes communication and meeting folks to see if you want to add them to that small list.
