No interracial .

Nice! Love it. He will be a lucky dude. She is such a fun, smiling gal.

RonKathy,

It almost sounds as if I know this guy. Do I? It sounds like a fun weekend planned for sure. If all goes well, I am sure we will have stories to trade on Monday. :)
Rest up.

NICE!!

That is what I love to read about.

None last night for us, but a great 4some on Saturday, late.

This dopey post can go on for a few more years. IMHO, it died weeks ago!

WTF does it matter what people write as a preference? If they are not calling you out or harming you directly, move on. I am quite sure there are people on here who do not want to play with a pasty white irish/scottish dude, cool as he may be. I don't even know who is behind any such profile so why would I ever care? Additionally, this is 100% about fantasy, and if my white body, or my s&p hair, or your black cock-- big or not, or your afro does not fit in someone else's fantasy, so fucking what!

Hopefully the human race!

I dont think people are racist necessarily when they state "NO BBC" but it can come off that way for sure. People also state "play within our own race" which also sounds racist but i wouldnt jump to conclusions personally. People do have preferences and they should always be respected

@TheTravelVeteran
I have never put it on my profile but I have to say you were describing me in part of your post.

I avoid men that describe themselves as BBC (also those that call themselves bulls). It is the attitude involved with calling themselves something like that that is a complete turn off to me.

I'm not picking body parts out of a catalog I'm looking for men I can connect with who will turn me on. Men that lead with their dick size make me think that is all they have to offer me and that is not enough.
I also tell any man that wants to send me a dick pic that a dick pic doesn't tell me if he knows how to use it.

Do I see BBC or "no black men" and think that those people HATE black people? No. That would be stupid and completely unreasonable. I don't like certain things, it doesn't mean I hate them.

Do I think if they have "No BBC" on their profile, that it means they don't want black men? Of course I feel that way when I see it. First off, why doesn't it just say no big dicks? So, you'll take a white guy 10 inches but not a black guy? So, I'm supposed to send a message confirming I'm not a BBC, just to talk to you? When no one else of any size does. There's some reason you don't want a big BLACK dick and felt the need to announce it.

Maybe you think it sounds better than saying "I only play with my race." or "No black men"... So they use "BBC" as an alternate line. Maybe they have a stigma towards guys who run around screaming "I'm a BBC" and they aren't interested in those that carry themselves like that. Maybe they don't want friends or other partners to know... Maybe maybe maybe... But I won't just throw racist on them.

I can tell you two things I've NEVER seen on the same profile though. "No BBC" ...and any statement like "All races welcome." It's one or the other, but never both. I don't know what they do in their private life or at events, but that says "Don't try it here" to me.

So, if a profile says, “No BBC!”, then that means the “profile” is racist? So, by default, if a profile states, “Looking for BBC only!”, then that “profile” is also racist!

You can’t have it one way only. It goes both ways!

Personally, I think it’s all a load of crap! People are entitled to what they want when it comes to the most intimate of physical acts.

SLO

For real?

You've played in multiple states AND overseas?

I think you're one of a select few dozens of couples or singles to ever do that.

I thought it was illegal overseas. They throw Americans swinging in other countries in jail!

"we aren't racist but only play within our own race"

a tagline directs you to please read this last line

@Trainer

"When a profile says “No BBC”. Are they saying no to black men or no to black men with large penises?

When a profile says “No BWC”. Are they saying no to white men or no to white men with large penises."

I don't know. That is the answer. Some can interpret NO BBC to mean no black men or mean no black men with large cocks. The ambiguity of the phrase lends itself to multiple interpretations. It seems that you may want to lump the multiple ways that it can be interpreted into one.

A long time ago on another site, I got into a relatively heated discussion about this topic. The topic while not exactly the same, was fairly close. The OP had written that the NO BBC or NO blacks that people were racist. They extrapolated out of the statement that because the preference was for their same race that the person was a racist. I felt that was wrong. Just like I feel that this ambiguous phrase can be interpreted differently. The poor word choice by people can be intentional or it can be ignorance. I do not know.

On a weird tangent, on that other site OP proposition, I pointed out that if I were in the lifestyle with my ex-wife, we would more than likely have a No blacks on our profile. The person called me and my ex racists. I said, "You were not anally raped when you were 14 by a black man and had to spend a few years in therapy. You do not cringe when cornered by a black man and how it brings up the memory of that time. So the choice would be to not put ourselves in that position. It doesn't mean we are racists. It just means that it brings back a very bad memory." Now I bring that up because it can tie into what you are seeing here. Not only do we not know if BBC means no blacks or no black men with big cocks. We do not know WHY they have that restriction.

And if you are really concerned about people treating people as pieces of meat, get over it. People are denied sex with others because they are _____ (too old, too young, too tall, too short, has body hair, doesn't have body hair, black, white, latin, asian, glasses, no glasses, educated, non-educated, dick too big, dick too small, tits too big, tits too small, overweight, underweight, gym body, dad body, etc.) So the BBC is just one of a long list of reasons why people want to either fuck you or not. And to make matters even more fucked up . . . that situation whether they want to fuck you or not is something that can change depending upon a whole bunch of other factors. Just think of the old story that at the end of the night when you are at a bar, that person that looked horrendous when you got there 5 hours earlier looks good enough now.

If people are offended by the BBC phrase, fine. If you see it, just scratch the people off your list. It's pretty simple :)

8inchcable,

I’ve been in the lifestyle 7yrs
I’ve been on SLS 5 yrs total. This is my third stint.
Played in multiple states. Different countries.

I have yet to come across profile belonging to a couple/single female, that states BBC of any form in their profile, be it negative or positive, and it doesn’t explicitly refer to black men.

"When a profile says “No BBC”. Are they saying no to black men or no to black men with large penises?"

How long have you been in the lifestyle or on SLS?
It does NOT say no Black men. It says no Big Black Cock.

A woman will usually tell you if your dick is too big.
Whether by the pics or in person.

If you don't know if you're Black or if your dick is larger than what she wants, just ask her.

"Someone calling themselves a Queen of Spades or a BBC doesn't bother us. We would prefer other terms, but their use of those terms doesn’t mean that we’ll scratch them off our list."

I actually don't much mind a man referring to himself as a BBC. It's a winning strategy, you know? But I judge Queens of Spades and seekers of BBC hard and will race to scratch them off my list. I think it's the objectification without thought that makes the difference. Sure, be attracted to black men, I certainly am, but that's different than looking for BBC or styling yourself a Q of S.

In this lifestyle objectifying, and being objectified is accepted behavior.

For many, it’s just part of the fantasy fulfillment.

We are all already involved in some of the most non-politically correct behavior. Someone calling themselves a Queen of Spades or a BBC doesn't bother us. We would prefer other terms, but their use of those terms doesn’t mean that we’ll scratch them off our list.

EroticAmazon,

When a profile says “No BBC”. Are they saying no to black men or no to black men with large penises?

When a profile says “No BWC”. Are they saying no to white men or no to white men with large penises.

I am not lumping things together.

I am merely stating and bringing to light the reality.

Nothing is wrong with calling a big black cock a big black cock. The problem lies in referring to a man as an appendage.

Your answers to the first two questions will answer your own statement of who’s lumping what with whom.

Perhaps it is just my bias of growing up in South Florida and the massive latin population there. But there is an interesting irony from the OP. I found that a vast majority of latin married men would not let other men fuck their wife, but it was OK to fuck your wife. The concept was that the man was expected to have a mistress. One was the mother of his children and the other was the person he fucked.

So to complain that there is racial preferences and to have that as a latin cultural issue is pretty funny.

@Trainer

I think people have gotten a little too sensitive with words. No, I am not a person who wears a red baseball hat with a few words on it. I am actually the polar opposite of that. But let's play this hypothetical.

A black man is in front of me. The gentleman gets naked. The gentleman gets aroused. The gentleman has a very large dick.

Please, tell me what is wrong with describing it as a big black dick?

Now, let me flip that and replace the second word of the first sentence and make that white.

Please, tell me what is wrong with describing that as a big white dick?

They are three words that describe the object. They are not wrong.

I think your argument is that SOME people objectify people. You are right. Some people do. However, that doesn't mean that you have to let impact you. I don't think that everyone that states BBC is objectifying. I do think some may though. And to lump all of them together as being objectifying is, imo, wrong.

My wife repeatedly says she is the Queen of Jinx.

I think that has a nice ring to it and find it to be very positive

Queen of Spades

Does denote a preference for black men.

However, using “King/Queen of (insert derogatory term of the ppl you’re trying associate with)” praises you (King/Queen) and degrades them.

Many of the terms used in swinging are from the 1960s-70s. Terms that are deeply rooted in racial and social undertones.

Initially “Queen of Spades” was the equivalent of “_____ lover”

I shouldn’t have to fill in the blank

And, just maybe, “Queen of Spades” denotes a preference for having sex with black men. Who knows?

A LOT OF PEOPLE:

have a preference for a woman or man who is “just my type”, isn’t that right. It is for me.

SLO

That “Queen of Spades” mess is equally stupid. In my opinion.

Have you heard of the whole "Queen Of Spades" thing? Back in the 70s, "spade" was a racial slur, in a somewhat comedic way. I should address black guys in swinger clubs as spade. "Hey, SPADE, how's it going?" I wonder how well that will go over. Probably not as well as it does with the black guys who fuck the women who call themselves a "Queen Of Spades". ;)

Vabeachcouple,

Initially I was responding to CopNKitten. It seems they mistook my statement and stated the following:

"If black men are BBC, then all black men have large dicks."
not true in my experience. also not true that white men don't have large dicks. each man is different

The “if” statement was simply me making an hypothesis, that “if” black men are referenced as BBC (big black cock), then that means or validates that all black men are well endowed.

Which isn’t true by any means. So I was simply giving insight as to why referring to black men as BBC is incorrect.

The other question in regards to a couple excluding BBC and to what exactly they were excluding, was to validate, as cplofunswingers pointed out, the problem with using that term. The other example BWC, was used to make clear of how the lifestyle views the difference.

BBC = all black men
BWC = white men with large penises

Adoption of the terminology or not doesn't give reason as to why big black cock went from representing an appendage to representing a type of person.

In the end, as cplofunswingers mentioned, the black male is considered a tool or commodity rather than a person.

If you choose to use the term, while knowing the difference, then you are defending its use. The same goes for men who call themselves that.

I didn't mean "arguing" in a hostile way.

It just seemed you were trying to convince someone of something. Not sure who that someone was.