First Meeting Advice

Definitely begin with both of you together. MFM is a great way to test the waters because both of you get to see how the other is reacting. This way both of you also have the option to put a stop to play if either of you is uncomfortable. One of the huge pitfalls as mentioned is that you may never make it to playing together and that could tear your relationship apart. Jealousy will happen if she is doing only hotwife play and you never get involved. Start together and see how things go.

Okay there are pitfalls to doing it this way but they are about the same as if you were in the room as well. Personally I want to watch my wife enjoy herself and her comfort level is with me in the room. You two could be different. The big thing is how do you feel about her going off and having sex with someone while you watch the game or whatever? Of course the flip side is how would you feel watching another man have sex with her? Both involve jealousy issues for you and that could be her concern. She may also be concerned about her being jealous of you with another woman (seems to me you need to see how she feels about you finding a SF to go at it with alone). Then again a lot of couple swing separately and don't even go out together when looking for a partner so if that is what you want then have at it but go into it with an open mind. Of course you also deal with those jealousy issues on the first experience with a couple however if you and she have a partner and are in the same room it puts you both on equal footing in that department. My suggestion is if the "end goal" is both of you having sex with another couple then that is likely where you should start.

If you have interest in being a cuckold, then this is a good start. Otherwise, I can't think of a worse one than having your wife going off on her own.

Not sure I'd call it MFM if your wife is hooking up with a single guy without having to worry about you being in the room. I'd probably call that a hotwife playing alone with permission.

But I might be misunderstanding the scenario you have in mind.

The wife and I want to eventually get to swapping with a couple but want to try a mfm to get things started (to see if we like it). The wife is interested in hooking up with a SM for her first experience as she thinks it would be the best first step to trying this out, but without having to worry about me in the room.

Has anyone started out this way? How did it go?