[LOCKED]question for all

**I have feelings of jealousy, not of my spouse being with someone else, but of the other sex partner being far more attractive and better in bed.**

Our answer to that statement would be,,it's a normal fear from both husband and wife swinger virgins.Don't think it's just yours. Talking about it as a subject in depth before dipping your toes into the game is productive. Not talking about it is what those that are active swingers is what we call taking one for the Team.

It's really a normal swinger virgin couples question....talk about it together and/or don't do a meet and greet and/or forgetaboutit...lol ...it's all up to you as a couple.

Good reply MJ

PC you should ask your question in the getting started form, you would get a better response there.

But to answer your question, if it were me I would step back and not do anything now, you're not ready.
In life there is always going to be someone pretty, skinnier, tall and etc than you. You have to have the self confidence in yourself and your hubby and know that you are what he really wants and the other woman is just around for fun and fantasy.

Goodluck
Mrs. Voya

Hello Everyone,

We are new to this. My husband is ready to go, me on the other hand I am a little nervous and have some issues I need to deal with. This question is for the women. I have feelings of jealousy, not of my husband being with someone else, but of the other woman being far more attractive and better in bed. Any suggestions on how to get over this would be great:)

Try looking in your state forum. There may be club posting there. You can also click on the club link, to the left and see if any clubs are listed in your area.

Carrie

Does anyone no a swingers club in or around Saint Louis MO

I'm going to get grammer jock corrected fuk me with that last post ~grin` fuk it don't care forgetabout I say !!!

I swear I proofed it it must be the server....LMpirateAO I swear I'm not drunking rum & posting.

• snip* You never know unless you give it a try.

Write on dude...Just do it. But not just anytime "Whenever you see an attractive, married woman"

Now that would be idiotic and pathetic I'd add sad and stupid too.

Like I said in my post a couple of doors down the thread: A TASTEFULLY placed question works in the vanilla world as well as in the swinger world. Your invite to dare to ask the question or test the waters if you will would. lLke the thread starter stated in his post ...they where flirting with you in a vanilla world.

We aren't real big on swingles ourselves but I'm positive that Mrs. Finger would be turned on in a vanilla setting and that happened and a swingle used the V word to test the waters and see if we swang active that is.

You never know unless you give it a try. Just remember always sit across the table from the husband, how to duck & where the exits are. Never needed either of the last two yet but I still keep them in mind.

yawn...note to self forgetaboutit ~grin~

It seems in Nashville the couples all want a bi female for 3ways. As a mature sexy senior professional male I can't find a couple that wants to have a man kiss and lick her clit while he slid his cock in and out of her pussy. The 2 times I've done this the women absolutely loved it and wanted more> It seems the guys in and around Nashville are insecure in their manhood and are afraid to have a man as a part of a 3some. That or there are a awful lot of bi females that complain they can't find a bi female maybe hubby has not had his wish to see 2 ladies it might be inteesting to see how many wmen would like to see their man having sex with another guy to see if he enjoys sucking cock as uch as he enjoys sucking her clit! Anyone with any insight into this phenomenon?

A tastefully placed question works in the vanilla world as well as in the swinger world

Asking the husband if his wife is a good kisser works as good as the nekkid guy trick...lol...works two out of three times.

If the husband answers you need to ask her that question...ding...ding...ding we have a winner

If the husband answers give it a try and let me know what you think...ding...ding..ding we have a winner

If the husband answers that he is a better kisser then his wife...run forest run...LMAO

You let it get by, live and learn.

Female half here, I have been approached at a bar from others on the site, they ended up telling me they seen me on here after about an hour of talking. It all turned out great and had alot of fun. I feel that the couple may have seen you on here and for some reason didn't just come straight out and tell you after a bit. I am sure it happens all the time to people. So if one has pics on here then we have to keep that in mind when something like that happens.

I think they must have wanted you, after all they picked you out from the rest didn't they?

They wanted you

Wayne Gretzky said: "You miss 100% of the shots not taken."

Hi all,
As a newbie here, I'm glad the question was asked. It reminds me of back in the day when I would run into girls who didn't know the difference between flirting and FLIRTING.

Even here in the supposedly sexually open website I'm highly confused about how to approach anyone. I know everyone is different but it seems you have to have ESP to know who wants to go slow and who wants to just get to bed already.

I'll keep checking out the forums and taking my shots and maybe I'll learn something. :-)

Peace & Love!
DJ

SLOtowner makes a very good point.

An active single male needs to know when to take the lead. Many couples will contact you with the expectation that you are experienced, reputable, know what you are doing, and that you can guide them to the next step. They have come to you for these reasons, and you have a responsibility to deliver. What I would have done is assume that they wanted to play (it is pretty obvious that they do), and suggest that we go get a room.

You know, this seems very strange to me. NOT that the couple asked you to come over and sit and then became very suggestive, but that:

1. you were waiting for a direct invitation
2. you had to come here and ask "what should I have done?"

This is an old joke but here goes:
Guy walking down the street runs into a friend of his. His friend is all beat up, bleeding from a cut above his eye, his other eye is swollen shut, his lip is swollen and slightly split and bleeding and his clothing is all mussed up.

The guy asks, "Good grief, what happened to you!?"

His friend answers, "Well I saw this good looking chick and I asked her if she wanted to fuck. She beat the hell out of me! Must have had karate training or something!"

The guy says, "What? You just asked a strange woman to fuck? Do you do that often?" His friend nods yes. "Well, you sure must get beat up a lot!!"

His friend replies, "Yeah, I do get slapped a lot, mostly, but you'd be surprised at how much pussy I get, too!!"

So, the point is, you should have taken the lead and asked them if they could get away from their friends so you three could get over to their place and have some fun together. That's what they were waiting for. For you to say, "Hey yeah, let's do it."

Having a "social" card will allow them to contact you at a later date...if the feeling is right. The first guy to do that to me...ended up having me call him 3 months later.

M

One of the things we see all the time in the lifestyle is people who flirt, kissing touching, stroking, and talk about giving blow jobs when its safe and there is not way it could possibly happen. It's so hot that you know the party that night will be insane. Then when there is an opportunity like after the dance in the party rooms you can't find them anywhere. It happens all the time at swing conventions and events. You see the same kind of thing on here with people who send endless sexy E-mails but never show up in person. Women in the lifestyle have become very aggressive sexually. Most of them have no problem communicating their desires.

Picking up someone in a straight crowd is extrememly difficult at best. For that reason we prefer going to swing clubs or bars. That way at least there is some common understanding that you are there for a purpose not just hanging out talking about sports. There are a lot of people outside our lifestyle who like to flirt but if you ask the question they act offended.

Like all things in the lifestyle it's up to the women, well with the possible exception of the guy who drinks beer, eats hot dogs and watches sports while getting a blow job! I think the only thing a single guy can do in this situation is wait for the woman. If she is truly interested in a threesome she will let you know. She will find a way to stroke your cock and tell you she'd love for you to join her for a little fun. If you bring up the subject you could be the bad guy, very quickly.

There's a more direct way to figure this one out. Wait for the husband in question leaves the table...for a beer or what ever and follow him. Have a social card made up ahead of time with your name and e-mail address. You can put your phone number on it but I have both types. Only put your cell on it, never your home.

Tell him you are having a great time and would like to get to know them better. Express gratitude at their insistence that you join them. Tell him you have experience being the third wheel. And if that is that what they are looking for, you would be honored to help them out. If he says yes. Give him your card and set up another meeting.

I personally would be wary of going home with them. You have NO idea how experienced they are at this game. Someone could freak out and become violent. If he bites on playing that night, spring for a room. It's much safer to play at a hotel/motel than venture into another man's territory.

I would put in a "safe call" to a buddy. Tell him the names, car license plate #, and what hotel you are going to. Always leave a trail. Make sure you use condoms. It's always better to be safe. If they say you don't need protection, tell them you last longer with a condom on.. ;)

Good luck and plays safe.

Mischief (finds players every where.)

Boy, ya sure can tell when these threads spin off into never never land

so Then it's DA BOYS or the texans?