Tuesday Talks: Navigating Awkward Breakups in the Lifestyle

Transcript

Speaker1: This podcast is intended for adult audiences. Over the age of 18, it contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us, and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice. Welcome to the Swing Nation Podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers. We'll be right back. Welcome to the Swing Nation podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers, where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle. Come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe, interview the experts, learn and grow together. Join the nation. So Lacey, people are asking, how do they get to go to a party or an event with us? They check out swingersociety.net. You create a profile, you sign up for an event, and you come hang out with us. Super easy. That's right. If you want to party with us and the other faces and names that you know from social media and TikTok, head on over to swingersociety.net. Can't wait to see you there. Sexual health care can be so much more than STI testing. WISP offers services like emergency contraception, help in delaying your period, UTI treatments, and so much more. They even have a product called the OMG Cream that helps provide more fulfilling orgasms for women. WISP provides same-day prescriptions and can give you discreet treatment in the comfort and privacy of your own home. Check out the link in our show notes or go to HelloWiz.com and use code SWING for 15% off. Most people have unprotected oral sex, right? Be honest. Now think about your last STD test. Did your doctor tickle your throat with something that looked like a giant Q-tip? Probably not. Yet that's the only way to check for oral gonorrhea or chlamydia, which are often asymptomatic. You need a better doctor. You need shamelesscare.com. Use coupon code TSN at checkout. It's a vibe, it's a groove We're breaking the taboo Dan and Lacey in the house Bringing truth to you Questions on the table Let's talk, let's play Swing Nation Tuesday, light up your day Non-monogamy, let's dive in deep Breaking down the walls, no secrets we keep From the wild to the real, your stories, your confessions Let's turn it up loud with your burning questions Let's talk, let's vibe, let's swing, let's ride
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Speaker1: Tuesday talks, a place where no rules collide. Love, trust, freedom, it's all in the game. The Swing Nation podcast, changing the frame. Shake on the spine. So tune in, turn up, let's make this bold Dan and Lacey hear the stories unfold Swing Nation's your tribe, your podcast crew Tuesday Talkuesday talks a moment let's make a move in five four three two one hey there pineapple people and welcome to the swing nation podcast we are your hosts northern guy and southern girl and we are back with another rendition of Tuesday Talks. Yeah. Talkin' Tuesday. Talkin' Tuesday. Yeah, baby. What? I don't know what that was. We need some jingles. We do. So you don't have to listen to me sing. Yeah, it's not great. There's some cool apps out there. There's one called Suno, S-U-u-n-o it's like this ai app you type in some words you pick like a john a genre of music and it like makes a song for you yeah so if you're bored if you're you know maybe you're taking a poop or something and you need something to do is that what you do yeah when you're taking a poop you need you know you're just sitting're just sitting there. What else are you doing? Scrolling? Yeah, make a Tuesday talk jingle. Jeez. And send it to us at theswingnation at gmail.com. Save it as an MP3. Shoot it our way, and we'll get your little poop and jingle up on our podcast. Right? Yeah. Why is it so funny? I don't know. You're like a child. You're like a child every time i say the word poop you start laughing you're a child this is a serious conversation here yeah i'm just trying to give our listeners something to do okay free time okay you know i mean i care about i care about them what's our question today dear all right let's turn to the phone lines with this week's Tuesday Thought Question. make great relationships. Have you ever had a situation where you had to break it off with a couple or an individual? And if so, how do you handle those difficult conversations? I find myself someone who communicates very easily. However, when it comes to confrontation or drama and things like that, it can be difficult. However, I do want to be an honest person. I was wondering how do you navigate those difficult conversations if you have any tips or tricks? We would greatly appreciate it. And thank you so much for taking our questions. Bye. That's a doozy. It's like that TikTok thing. We listen and we don't judge we are not great with this one but we're gonna be i'm gonna be honest are you gonna be honest i'm always honest i'm brutally honest so i'm honest to a fault i don't like hurting people that i care about so i don't like having difficult conversations with people that i genuinely care about their feelings. So I find myself when it's someone that I've known or developed a relationship with on some level, I don't mean like romantic relationship, but a friendship, you know, something. I have a hard time saying no. It's easier for me just to kind of either distance myself or avoid a situation than it is to really like sit down and have those hard conversations. I know that the right thing is to be open and honest and straightforward because I would want someone to do the same to me, but I do definitely struggle with that. Yeah, no, I, I can agree. So if we, you know, what she's asking about is in this lifestyle you're going to have multiple relationships that you're kind of juggling right and sometimes you're going to have friends come into your life and you're going to get really close to them and you're going to feel like your besties or something and then something's going to happen and it's just not whether it's they get in a disagreement with you they get a disagreement with someone else maybe the husbands don't buy you know whatever it could like honestly it it couldn't like nothing could happen you could just maybe like go a different direction like that it doesn't have to be an event to like decide that maybe this couple isn't right for you and i can you know when it is an event right something happens i don't know somebody texts somebody on the side or you know something like that happens usually those there is nothing to say like everybody knows what happened yeah it's awkward it's weird and you just kind of distance yourself right and those aren't the hard ones i guess the harder ones are i can try to think of a time when it's like oh man i'm kind of kind of not feeling what's their names anymore like we used to but i don't really want to tell them that i'm not feeling them so i'm just going to kind of avoid them agreed most of our times where we've had to like distance ourselves from the couple we all knew right something happened everybody we all knew and we just kind of went our ways it really there really wasn't anything to talk about we all knew and we just kind of like okay well that was a fun run but we're gonna we're gonna move along and to be honest with you we've even been in circles with those people and just because we don't actively want to sleep with each other and hang out and text every day we have no issues being around those people and you know them being in the same area hell they can be in the same warden and that's not really going to affect us. We are totally fine with that. I think we do a really good job of like understanding that it's okay if we don't all get along and it's just not all going to happen. I don't want to interrupt you, but it's interesting, you know, this take on this is interesting. And I think for us, because we never, it's not like we go to the same club every weekend right we go to a different event usually we're in different cities every month a different party and it's always a different group of people right correct but then there is some that go to everyone that go to a lot but then usually it's you know 95 other people and then like five percent are Yeah. Most people see those core groups on the internet. And that's, I think we hang out with the same people every time. And they do, they are correct. A lot of the same people travel in the same group, but there's a lot more too. Yeah. So the only reason I bring that up is because for us, it's like, okay, if we have a falling out with somebody, no big deal. We're going to see a whole, you know, we're going to see different people next month. Yeah. Or be around, you know, it's easy for us to be. But if you went to the same club every Saturday night. That's what I'm thinking. If this listener is going to the same club every weekend or once a month or whatever. It might just be easier to sit down. And seeing the same people. How do you, how do you avoid them? Like, how do you, you'd have to say something. You don't. You just have to talk. I think you just have to be an adult and say, listen, I, you know, this was great, but now it's not. And I respect you and I respect you to this club and I want to still come here and I still want to be, you know, in this environment. So can we agree to just be here and be cordial and not be enough and not be OK? I think that's kind of what you do. Right. Really? And that's I think I see you have two options. You have the first option, which is you just distance yourself without saying it right so without having the awkward conversation of like hey you know this is weird but you know we'll all be well we can all still be a quarter but we don't have to be friends without having that conversation you can just not answer their text just kind of not go to the same parties just kind of try to avoid them right yeah and then you not have the confrontation but if you're going to the same club with them and you have the same friend group as them you're almost you're almost obligated to have this now awkward conversation and i think the answer that the conversation is just be honest hey guys you know we feel this way because of xyz we we understand you have a different perspective we don't this we don't have to make this weird i know we have the same friends can we just be cordial when we're around each other and that actually happens a lot i'm not gonna lie we see it all the time um it it's it's not uncommon but i think this is a friend group thing like it is it is it's a friend group thing it it's it's any group thing it's a baseball mom group thing it's a bunch of dads that watch football maybe not them because they're usually so laid back it doesn't matter but you know what i mean like there's well and this is um this is going to be controversial it's usually the women yeah it is right unless it's like the man who very rarely have issues with each other it's usually the women where the friction points are yeah women getting along with each other for whatever reason you're not wrong in my experience i'm not trying to be sexist i'm not trying to be sometimes the men get involved in it so then you know but yes you're right for the most part if men just hung out but men fucking women caught you know like we're just happy to be there what i don't want to why would i want drama i'm going to parties and fucking all these beautiful women what is there to be upset about like i don't know but i can think of a lot of guys that are upset in the lifestyle yeah and think about it but i mean i don't know if it was just guys with i don't know then it wouldn't be be lost. So, but yeah, I mean, it's a hard one. I will say, um, that for me, and this is like kind of a sub answer to this, but for the most part, all the women and people that I've met in my life outside the lifestyle, I've always pretty much got along with everyone. I've never had any falling out. You know, I've had friends that we've grown apart over the years years but i've never had like something that happened and we're no longer friends anymore that's just not i have friends that i've known for 30 plus years we may not talk every day but we're still really you know like if i needed them they would come um in the lifestyle i find that it's been kind of cutthroat for me which is crazy because we talk so positively about this lifestyle and how accepting and love and you know rainbows and sunshine and unicorns and but truth be told people can be mean in their lifestyle and i don't know if it's social media i don't know if it the podcast i don't know if there's an added layer to it because of the platform that we have um or i don't know but it's it's been hard for me personally to navigate these emotions and these feelings around kind of distancing ourselves and or someone distancing themselves from us in the lifestyle because i guess maybe because we fuck them i get not attached but it's hard for me when things don't go well and we we lose that friendship okay so i mean we've kind of said so do you like honestly do you think there's more friction in a lifestyle group of people than there would be like like you said at the with the baseball moms well we're fucking pta moms or you're fucking yeah there's got there it's it's a different level i don't know if it's if it's more but when you're you're actively fucking my husband and you piss me off that yeah that's there's a different emotion there than if you just piss me off at the baseball field because you said something there those are two different things so when they there you see what you're i think if i'm hearing you what you're saying is when there is a friction point within the lifestyle it's usually a bigger deal than if it was there was a friction point at a pta meeting or baseball mom meeting or yeah to me it is yeah and i get that but i'm also a very sensitive person um and this is not like for the faint of heart and and being public and having on social media all of that just probably amplifies that well i think yeah even without that i think though like what you said okay people are complicated so you know socially mingling with people and maintaining a bunch of different different relationships dynamics all at same time, that is difficult without fucking each other. Yeah. Now you add in the, you're getting romantically involved with multiple of these people within this multiple of people. Just complex it. It just makes it 10 times more complicated. Yeah. And I know we tend to say like, hey, there's not a lot of drama in the lifestyle and we try to be drama free. And that is true we try we try to do all those things but when you really think of all the dynamics that are at play in this community it's going to happen it's just going to happen yeah and i think you know from my perspective it's not i don't even think i don't have a problem with friction points happening or with disagreements happening or with people getting their feelings hurt or people you know crossing boundaries they didn't know that happen yeah i think where we need to get better is when those things happen how we handle it right how we respond to that i think the communicating our way through that is where we can really improve because those things are going to happen and us included i think you know like just like i said in the beginning uh like we listen and we don't judge i think that that this is one area that you and i could do a lot better in yeah right tell me how you feel yeah okay i understand that we tend to avoid right here's my perspective yeah okay maybe we can't resolve this but we can at least be in common spaces and and not and act like adults yeah um so that was kind of a tangent but i do it was a tangent it was only a 13-minute tangent though so it's not that bad it's not that bad yeah uh but to answer your question i think everybody's going through this um i think the best answer is to have those hard conversations yeah i think she knew because she said you know, you know. And be direct. Yeah. Tips on how to do that. Just talk to them. Just try to be honest. Be open and brutally honest. I've always said that I'd rather somebody be mad at me for, like, the honest, you know. If I'm honest, then if I make up some, like, lie and, like, create some story. And then they're mad at me for that that lie and that story it's just better just to be honest now with that said we we've done it all you know we've probably made up stories we've avoided we've done we've done all the bad things so it's definitely something that we will work on with y'all right i hope that helps i'm not sure if it did or didn't but i hope that helps. Okay, so if you have a Tuesday talk question that you want to call in and ask us and hear us fumble our way through and not actually answer. I think we answered it. We tried to answer it. You can call us, and that phone number is? 972-302-7716. One more time. 972-302-7716 Or if you do not feel comfortable sharing your beautiful voice on the airwaves, you can always email us your question at theswingnation at gmail.com, theswingnation at gmail.com. We definitely like hearing your voice more. We do. So, at least prioritize the he does the voicemails over the emails i i put my neck out for those emails so sometimes i'm like no we're doing this email um before we go a couple of big events that we haven't talked about lately bliss clues 2025 is pretty much sold out if you really want to go um you can always email us at admin at swingersstudy.net. We can help you get on the waiting list. But 2025 is pretty much done. So let's start talking about 2026. They're going to have three cruises. So if that's something that you're interested in, we'll be on all three. We can't wait to have fun and party with you. You can go to swingersstudy.net and book those. The cruises are where it's at. It's a lot of fun something you should do you should do the cruise and you should do hito which just so happens in 2025 we're going to hito and we'll go we'll probably go in 2026 but this 2025 we're going in july and it's going to be a lot of fun party march is going to be there a bunch of hot groups it's it's going to be a blast and hedo is like you know it's like home what do they say when you get there welcome back welcome home yeah pretty much uh yeah and then you said they added the third cruise for 2026 and so real quick that's a weekend cruise basically right no like a four day no it's not a weekend it's like monday through friday but um so that's a short yeah but back to bliss um normally the cruise are like saturday to saturday or like sunday to sunday this one is you leave on a monday and you come back on a friday so it's four nights or sorry four days three nights or something like that it's a shorter cruise it is a shorter cruise which means it's cheaper it's a little bit cheaper which means you don't have to get your babysitter and your dog sitters and all that for as long yeah um so if you know and it's a little lighter on the budget yeah payment plans are available so if you're not sure if the bliss cruise is something that you want to try this is kind of a they're calling it like a sampler cruise yeah and honestly like i booked it for us and it's 500 down and i think like for us and we did not get the cheapest room, but not the most expensive, and it was like $250 a month. I don't think that's that bad. I do get that people were on limited budgets. You got a somewhat bougie room, too. Yeah, we did. We got a balcony room for that price. You got a year to pay for it. I think the final payment's like December 1st to January 1st, this time next year. All right. So if you're interested in any of the cruises or hito or any of our events coming up at secrets we got club takeovers happening all across the country go to swingersociety.net and check out our upcoming events we'd love to see you whether that be in jamaica or on a cruise or at a club somewhere yep all right guys i think with that you know world full of apples be the pineapple be the pineapple guys bye bye if you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us leave a five-star review wherever you're listening if you want to see more of our content you can find find links to Snapchat, Twitter, Instagram, OnlyFans, and more in the show notes. Come join the conversation with us and other Swinger content creators on our Swinger Society Discord server. If you have questions or feedback, email them to us at theswingnation at gmail.com. Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up to date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us, and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.