Send us Fan MailTuesday Talks: Is the Lifestyle Only for Fit and Attractive Couples? | Episode 35In this episode of The Swing Nation Podcast, the top-rated lifestyle podcast about non-monogamy and swinging, Dan and Lacy dive into a heartfelt Tuesday Talks question from an anonymous listener.After following Dan and Lacy on social media, this listener shares her concerns about whether the lifestyle is only for fit and conventionally attractive couples. As a plus-size woman, she worries about not being desired or fitting in within the community.Dan and Lacy address these fears with compassion, discussing the importance of inclusivity, body positivity, and the diverse beauty celebrated in the lifestyle. Tune in for an empowering conversation that shows the lifestyle truly has space for everyone!- The Swing Nation - Main Website Quick Navigation Website: -- (Find all our social media links more!)- Swinger Society - Our Website to meet, connect events Swinger Society Discord Our Facebook Group- Swinger Websites -Kasadie 90 day free trialUsername: TheSwingNation SDC 14 day free trial Username: TheSwingNation** Use code 36313 for 14 days free! ** SLSUsername: NorthernGuynSouthernGirl- Merch More -Order Your Merch Here!- Lacy’s Fun Links -VIP OnlyFansPREMIUM OnlyFans-- THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS --Wisp : Making sexual healthcare inclusive, cost-effective, and accessible—for everyoneUse Code SWING at checkout for 15% off your oder!Shameless Care: ED Medication and at home STD testingUse Code TSN at checkout for $30 off your order!Promescent® Make Love Longer, It’s Time for Great SexUse Code SwingNation for 5% off!Sing it Bikinis: adjustable one-size styles, thoughtfully crafted to flatter every body type.Support the show- Thank you for the support! -
Transcript
Speaker1: This podcast is intended for adult audiences. Over the age of 18, it contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us, and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice. Speaker2: Welcome to the Swing Nation Podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers. We'll be right back. Welcome to the Swing Nation podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers, where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle. Come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe, Speaker1: interview the experts, learn and grow together. Join the nation. So Lacey, people are asking, how do they get to go to a party or an event with us? They check out swingersociety.net. You create a profile, you sign up for an event, and you come hang out with us. Super easy. That's right. If you want to party with us and the other faces and names that you know from social media and TikTok, head on over to swingersociety.net. Can't wait to see you there. Sexual health care can be so much more than STI testing. WISP offers services like emergency contraception, help in delaying your period, UTI treatments, and so much more. They even have a product called the OMG Cream that helps provide more fulfilling orgasms for women. WISP provides same-day prescriptions and can give you discreet treatment in the comfort and privacy of your own home. Check out the link in our show notes or go to HelloWiz.com and use code SWING for 15% off. Most people have unprotected oral sex, right? Be honest. Now think about your last STD test. Did your doctor tickle your throat with something that looked like a giant Q-tip? Probably not. Yet that's the only way to check for oral gonorrhea or chlamydia, which are often asymptomatic. You need a better doctor. You need shamelesscare.com. Speaker2: Use coupon code TSN at checkout. Tuesday Talks, just send your questions to Dan and they say, Tuesday Talks, Swing Nation got you feeling sexy, Tuesday Talks, Talking Tuesday with Dan and they say, hey there pineapple people and welcome to the Swing Nation podcast. We are your hosts, Northern Guy and Southern Girl. We are back with another rendition of tuesday talks we are talking tuesday we didn't let's see we got a lot of questions in in our uh inbox we did but no jingles yeah i think i think you you i think that's past the jingle thing's over yeah Yeah, I think so. It's run its course? Speaker3: Yeah. Speaker2: But didn't that guy say he's got another one? Speaker1: Yeah, but, and we'll, like, I like his.
Speaker2:
You like his?
Speaker3:
Yeah.
Speaker2:
So the same guy, do you remember his name? I put you on the spot.
Speaker1:
Swinging something.
Speaker3:
Yeah.
Speaker1:
His apart, yes. I can't remember, damn it.
Speaker3:
Oh, yeah. Anyway.
Speaker1:
He's from Southern California, though.
Speaker3:
I know that.
Speaker1:
He was in your TikTok a lot, but he said he had another one. Yeah. He's working on another one. That's cool. Alright. Well if we go to the phone lines we actually have a question. Oh we do? You don't know. You haven't heard it. You haven't listened to it. You have no idea. Are you ready? Yeah. Okay. Here we go. Here's this week's Tuesday talk question. Hey hey guys i have a quick question for you my partner and i are brand new into the lifestyle and we are seeing that a lot of people on for instance euros tiktok's and your stories and we follow you on all of the platforms are all very very good looking have really nice body shapes that are either toned or fit um not so much for me i have a lot of weight that i'm trying to get off and so i'm trying to decide my place and it seems that a lot of people may not be as interested in someone who's heavier and i'm wondering what your thoughts are on that and if that's really true in the lifestyle because we are still brand new or is it just something that i'm seeing because that's what i'm looking for because that's my insecurity i would really like to know what your thoughts are on plus-size people in a lifestyle. Is that normal and common, or is it not so much? Thanks, guys. That kind of makes me want to cry. To be fair, Lacey's in an emotional state. We've had a rough week with family and dealing with cancer patients and all that. So you are a little emotional. I am. But that kind of hurts my heart because we can't – social media is fake. Let's just be real. It is. But we can't super fake it. we can't make people come out as swingers if they're not. And we can't make people come out and be public on social media if they don't want to, right? Like we can, that's just not how it works. Um, so the, what happens is that the people that are comfortable with being on social media is who we are like, Hey, let's doiktok together right you know and honestly i feel like they kind of come in all shapes and sizes um but i don't know what her version of plus size is because that can be a relative term you know i mean i don't know which her version is but there's been times that I was in a 14 pushing 200 pounds on TikTok. But people have called me fat when I was a size six. So I don't know. I'm kind of rambling. I'll let you. No, that is an interesting question. It's interesting to me because you see what people from the outside see, right?
Speaker2:
So I think when we think of ourselves, when we think of our friend groups, I wouldn't describe us or our friend groups as super fit, super model type people.
Speaker1:
Quite a few of them have had weight loss surgery or have naturally lost a significant amount of weight. There's quite a few that have had extra skin and skin removal surgery or the shots. Oh yeah. I've done the shots, done tummy tugs. I mean like there was kind of a little bit of all. Um, yeah.
Speaker2:
I think quite a few in our friend group, if we actually think about it, have gone through some type of a weight loss journey in the last few years. Yeah. Um, which I think, you know, that's probably a little significant of America because I think quite a few in our friend group, if we actually think about it, have gone through some type of a weight loss journey in the last few years. Yeah. Which I think, you know, that's probably a little significant of America because I think with these new shots and pills and stuff that are out there, quite a few people are going through that. Obviously, I know that those are expensive and, you know, you're coming from somewhat of a place of privilege to be able to even afford to do that stuff. Yeah, and I don't want to even glorify that, to be honest with you, because that's not what the question is. The question is, are people of all sizes accepted? And the answer is 100% yes. You just do not have a whole lot of representation on social media of people of all sizes. There are there to be, I can think of a few, and I'm not going to like call people out by names. I'm not going to say this person is plus size but i can think of a few people that are on social media um that are would fall into would fall into that category um i would think that the vast majority of lifestylers are not super fit model-y types i think when you go on social media that's just kind of what you're seeing yeah yeah i feel like i'm struggling answering this question no no well i think the answer is you know her real question is you know when she sees our tiktoks and our our friend group posts and our pictures is that a true representation of the lifestyle i think the answer is yes um i think but we're not super fit right and i i think what you're seeing if i had to take a guess is you're seeing our pictures where people are posing a certain way yeah when people are using a certain filter um you know some of those pictures we're putting ourselves in the best light possible there might have been a hundred pictures taken and some of them showed stretch marks and and flab skin and this and that, wrinkles and all that stuff. We've deleted those ones, picked the one or two where everybody's kind of standing perfect and right. We've put a filter on it. We've brushed it up, and we've posted it, right? Yeah. And maybe that's not fair, right? Maybe we shouldn't do that. Maybe we should try to be more authentic. But the truth is we're all just like she's saying she's insecure about her i'm extremely insecure when these people most of the people that we know that are social media influencers and stuff have their own insecurities and especially hard when you're posting yourself and a million people are commenting on it and are looking for that one you know flaw so that they can point it out to you a thousand times over and over what happens in this kind of toxic machine is that people you know tend to over filter their pictures or find the best pictures or put themselves in the best light um that's probably not the right answer you know i mean yeah and like what you said really the answer is social media is fake yeah i think our friend group is a pretty good representation of all body shapes and sizes we have big people we have little people we have young people we have old people we have people that are super fit we have people that have never seen a gym in their life in our group me uh but what you're seeing on on social media is most of us are posting and and posing in a certain ways that oh yeah we probably look our best in those situations just like anybody anybody that's posting like you don't have to be public swinger you could be posting on like a private page that you know only a slope you give you know the authorization to look at you're going to put your best pictures there it's the same kind of concept except for ours is on a much bigger scale now i will say when you go to events when you start interacting with groups you're going to see people of all shapes sizes races ethnic um yeah but i think it's also worth mentioning that different groups bring different types of people and it might take you a few different parties or um or clubs to really find your people and I don't mean like your people as
Speaker1:
in the size of their bodies because that's not what I mean I mean it might be ages it might be it could be a number of different things there's some like some parties pull like a lot younger crowd a more rave crowd that might not be what you're into you might be you know I don't know how old she is but let's say you're in your 50s and you like more like top 40 hits I mean you You have to do it.
Speaker2:
You have to do it.
Speaker1:
You have to do it.
Speaker2:
You have to do it. You have to you like more like top 40 hits i mean you have to find the type of party and the type of people that you want to hang out with and so i think that's worth mentioning that not one you know they're all a little different right yeah no 100 i think some groups are more like you're saying ravey party some groups are more about having sex and orgies some some groups are it's a fashion show it's all about how you look what you wear there's a little bit of everything some are more social you know um and less focused on sex so there's all types of groups all over the country and yeah it definitely is i think this the how you find success in the lifestyle is finding a group that you you vibe with finding a group that you click with find your community find your friends and you'll be successful but the truth is that there's people of all shapes sizes colors ethnic creeds religious backgrounds political backgrounds every career field you can think of it's all going to be represented in the swingers lifestyle and we try really hard to try to represent that the best we can on social media and i guarantee we've fallen short obviously by her comments that's what i was going to say this is not directed to her but i know that this is something that has been brought up numerous times and i guess if we cannot make people be public but we all can agree with that it takes a a person to come forward and say, I'm comfortable with everyone knowing I'm a swinger and I'm comfortable being on social media. Outside of making people do that, how do we do a better job? Because I think that's something we need to look at. We want everyone to feel comfortable we want everyone to feel welcome so how do we make our tick tocks we also get this about race because there's not a lot of openly people in the lifestyle that are not just like caucasian right um people of color yeah yeah like pretty much all of our friend group that is public there's actually quite a few that are come to our parties and show up at events. There's just not a lot of influencers that are people of color in our group. And we really don't see a lot on social media in the swingers' lifestyle. But we want to do a better job of that. We want to do a better job of showcasing all body types, all colors, all the things. So I guess if anybody has any suggestions, how do we, we can't force anybody to be in our tiktoks um so how can we do a better job of representing that because we want everyone to feel like welcome we have um we have made our flyers and posters i don't know if you noticed but they are they have all sizes all colors they've got males and females which is very uncommon most clubs and stuff have like white females skinny very skinny white females on their posters and we've tried really hard to branch out and and add all kinds of different shapes and sizes and colors um but i want to do a better job i hate that she feels that way it hurts my heart. Yeah. No, and I think it is a few things. I think you're seeing our best foot forward. Some of it probably is your own insecurities that are manifesting at the people you're seeing and the pictures you're looking at. And I also think it's hard to represent the whole group when you only have a limited amount of people that are willing to be public and kind of share their stories yeah so it's a combination of things but it is something that we're aware of it's something that we're very i think knowledgeable of it's something that we're we're actively seeking um to make our group more more diverse and a better representation of who truly shows up um to the events and groups but like you said um we're limited by how we can we can do that so definitely if you are a person who wants to be public who wants to make tiktoks who wants to be in these pictures and in these promo videos and things like that uh definitely if you come out to an event and you want to take part in that we do do you know do tiktoks and pictures and things just everyone's welcome every event and we would be more than happy to have you um featured in some of our stuff so just um if you see us at an event and you say hey let's take a picture yeah go ahead post my picture i'm fine with it we might have you sign a model release or something like that so you don't come back later and sue us but um we'd be happy to have you so yeah definitely a good question i i do i think what you know and the reason i wanted to pick this topic is because i do want i think it's worth putting out there that this is not the pretty kids club it's not the popular kids club it really swinger events swinger parties swinger clubs i do think are some of the most diverse places that i've ever been in and socialized and some of the most welcoming and accepting people of all they don't care you know who you want to fuck we don't care what you look like we don't care what gender you are as long as you take a bath that's pretty much like our only like take a bath you respect people respect boundaries right and are clean um we'd be happy to have you in these places i think that's the bottom line alright so if you have a Tuesday talk question for us you can email that to theswingnation at gmail.com theswingnation at gmail.com or you can give us a call we definitely are trying to pick the phone calls over the text because I think it's good to hear people's voices and their inflection and kind of, it makes it a little more human, a little more authentic. So you can call us at number. 972-302-7716. One more time. 972-302-7716. So please call us with any of your questions. We'd be happy to answer them. And I think that's it. You got anything else for the Swing Nation listeners? I think that's it. All right. Well, you're definitely a diverse group, and we want you guys to come out. Please don't feel ashamed or don't feel like you won't fit in. I'd say I think what matters most is the attitude you come with oh for sure i mean i've seen some some girls that are definitely big girls out there naked as a jaybird partying it up i'm envious of them and they're sexy that is hot to me to me it's always more about the attitude than it is about the the body you know for sure it's you know personality attitude will get you very very far in this community in this lifestyle yep i agree all right i think with that
Speaker3:
Let's do that. the body you know for sure it's you know personality attitude will get you very very
Speaker2:
far in this community and this lifestyle yep i agree all right i think with that in a world full of apples be the pineapple be the pineapple guys bye if you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us leave a five-star review wherever you're listening if you want to see more of our content you can find links to snapchat twitter I don't know. If you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us, leave a five-star review wherever you're listening. If you want to see more of our content, you can find links to Snapchat, Twitter, Instagram, OnlyFans, and more in the show notes. Come join the conversation with us and other Swinger content creators on our Swinger Society Discord server. If you have questions or feedback, email them to us at theswingnation at gmail.com. Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up to date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.
