Send us Fan MailTuesday Talks: How to End a Play Session Without Climax | Episode 22Join Dan and Lacy on The Swing Nation Podcast, the top-rated lifestyle podcast about non-monogamy and swinging, for another Tuesday Talks segment where they answer listener questions. In this episode, Dan and Lacy respond to an anonymous listener who wants to know how to gracefully end a play session if they don’t orgasm. They discuss the importance of communication, managing expectations, and ways to navigate these situations without awkwardness or hurt feelings, ensuring that everyone leaves the experience feeling respected and satisfied.Tune in to learn how to wrap up a play session with grace, respect, and mutual understanding, and remember that every encounter can still be a positive experience, orgasm or not.Hit play now and join the conversation on this often overlooked aspect of the lifestyle!- The Swing Nation - Main Website Quick Navigation Website: -- (Find all our social media links more!) Follow us on Facebook! The Podcast Website- Swinger Society - Our Website to meet, connect events Swinger Society Discord Our Facebook Group- Swinger Websites -Kasadie 90 day free trialUsername: TheSwingNation SDC 14 day free trial Username: TheSwingNation** Use code 36313 for 14 days free! ** SLSUsername: NorthernGuynSouthernGirl- Merch More -Order Your Merch Here!- Lacy’s Fun Links - VIP OnlyFans PREMIUM OnlyFans-- THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS --Wisp : Making sexual healthcare inclusive, cost-effective, and accessible—for everyoneUse Code SWING at checkout for 15% off your oder! Shameless Care: ED Medication and at home STD testingUse Code TSN at checkout for $30 off your order!Promescent® Make Love Longer, It’s Time for Great SexUse Code SwingNation for 5% off!Pinaq Liqueur; The Official Drink of The Swing NationUse Code TSN at checkout for 15% off!Support the show- Thank you for the support! -
Transcript
Speaker1: This podcast is intended for adult audiences. Over the age of 18, it contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us, and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice. Welcome to the Swing Nation podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers, where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle. Come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe, interview the experts, learn and grow together join the nation so lacy people are asking how do they get to go to a party or an event with us they check out swingersociety.net you create a profile you sign up for an event and you, and you come hang out with us. Super easy. That's right. If you want to party with us and the other faces and names that you know from social media and TikTok, head on over to swingersociety.net. Can't wait to see you there. Sexual health care can be so much more than STI testing. WISP offers services like emergency contraception, help in delaying your period, UTI treatments, and so much more. They even have a product called the OMG Cream that helps provide more fulfilling orgasms for women. WISP provides same-day prescriptions and can give you discreet treatment in the comfort and privacy of your own home. Check out the link in our show notes or go to HelloWISiz.com and use code SWING for 15% off. Most people have unprotected oral sex, right? Be honest. Now think about your last STD test. Did your doctor tickle your throat with something that looked like a giant Q-tip? Probably not. Yet that's the only way to check for oral gonorrhea or chlamydia which are often asymptomatic you need a better doctor you need shamelesscare.com use coupon code tsn at checkout hey there pineapple people and welcome to the swing nation podcast we are your hosts northern guy and southern girl and today we have another tuesday talks episode for you we do do you have a do we have a question oh i thought you were gonna do the jingle what jingle god so you're just not gonna do it anymore you're letting all the guys i feel like it's played out like the jingle is like it's kind of run its course now so should i come up with my own one for next week your own jingle yeah you know i was actually thinking about this um i thought about the phone number we have for a swinger society yeah giving it out and like let people leave jingle voicemails oh yeah and then we could just like put that in there they could also leave us a voicemail jingle voicemails. Oh, yeah. And then we could just put that in there. They could also leave us a voicemail and ask questions. We could, yeah. We have to find that phone, though. Speaker2: Yeah. Speaker1: We don't charge it enough.
Speaker2:
We don't.
Speaker1:
We have to find the phone, set up the voicemail, and then maybe we could do that. And people will call and sing a little song. What do you think? Should we do that, people? Let us know.
Speaker2:
Okay.
Speaker1:
That was a rhetorical question. Well, I mean, like. I get what you're saying. Yeah. Just tell us if you like that's a rhetorical question well i mean like i get what you're saying yeah just tell us if you like that idea that's what i meant yeah okay so today's question is um she said hey it's from a lady hey guys tuesday talks question idea here no name please we are a lifestyle couple from outside the u.s although we've been to h few times and, of course, clubs and parties at home. How do you end a play session if the guy doesn't orgasm? I either get in my head that they might want it over but are keeping it or keep going just to please me, which is super distracting, or I actually am happy, done, but they're still going. It's hard without the obvious end point. This is a really good question. It is. I don't think I'm a, I think that I'm probably, I mean, I have my opinion, but I'm curious if other women feel the same way I do. I think I'm unique. You think you're unique? Kind of. But then I think about our friends, and that's kind of how everybody does it. Yeah. So, okay. Let's, before we get into answering this question, let's pause for a minute, because I think some people might not fully understand why this is even a question, right? So, what she's basically asking is, if the guys don't come, how does sex end? And I think if you think in most vanilla settings, if I think about sex throughout my lifetime, usually the sex ends when the guy comes, right? That's pretty typical, normal, hetero, monogamous sex, right? A guy and a girl have sex until the guy comes, and then it's kind of over. In my younger days, maybe I'd come a couple times oh that hasn't happened in a long time um we actually have friends that are capable of that though yeah male friends yeah uh but it is very normal in the swingers lifestyle um that most guys are on some type of male enhancement um ed medication type pill some guys even go as far as to use like trimax and the shots um and it's very typical when you're on that kind of medication at least for me specifically and i know some of our friends are like this too it's hard to have orgasms yeah on the medication one and then, it's hard for me to orgasm in the settings that we are in in the lifestyle. So in a room with a bunch of people when there's a lot going on, it's just sometimes it can be hard to relax and focus and achieve orgasm. yeah and for me because i know that you typically don't orgasm in like lifestyle settings i don't think twice of men not orgasming because i know like i'm only used to you and that's how you kind of handle things and then typically we go back to the room and that gives us an opportunity to kind of reconnect even if we don't have like actual sex like you know usually yeah i'll jerk you off with dirty talk we'll do some stuff but it's kind of like our way to reconnect and like put a cap on the night and kind of finish things out so for me when i'm playing with a guy it is not my goal to make them come. Lacey's goal is to make herself come. No, I mean like, because i know that you don't most guys that i play with don't don't finish um it's almost rare that guys do finish 10 of the time yeah maybe no those 10 i feel like a rock star when they finish but and maybe that's our friend group. I don't know because I only know, like, on personal experience. But it just seems like most guys don't finish in those settings. Now, there are some that do. Like you said, we have a couple of friends that can come multiple times in one play session, and we all kind of know that that's what they do. And I can see if you have a husband who you've been married to for 20 years and he can come multiple times or at least one good time every time you're having sex like that, I could see how you would worry about making someone come. Because we've played with women that really want to try to make you come. Yeah. Well, again, if you go back to heteronormative monogamous sex, that's what you're used to. So I can see once you enter the lifestyle space, especially if you're newer to the lifestyle and a female and you're used to making guys come, you kind of get it in your head that that's what know that's what you're that's what's supposed to happen yeah um and so when it doesn't happen i think a couple things maybe you feel inadequate or you feel like you didn't do a good job or you know you you didn't complete your task or whatever the the case may be um and i can understand why that would could you know could hurt somebody's feelings so it's kind of so to speak uh but i think that's why this is such a good question that we got uh from this listener because i think it's worth talking about that kind of everybody should know that it's very very normal in lifestyle spaces for males not to not to orgasm yeah okay so like the second part of her question is how do you end the night like how do you kind of cap the night without there being like a grand finale honestly you know i you know i've been thinking about this since we read this question earlier today or i think i screenshotted it and sent it to either today or last night or sometime when i when i saw it i was kind of like huh like what is the answer to that and when i think back on it if i think of all the play sessions even you know the place that we just got back from an and had several orgies, it's basically like either one. When we're just tired we're just done we're just everybody's like and i do think that in the lifestyle like a lot till you're exhausted yeah true but a lot of people overthink things like if you notice a lot of the questions that we get are people like really thinking really hard and it's usually not that big of a deal it's just kind of like sometimes i'm like i'm done you like you guys aren't keep going yeah y'all are badass i cannot fuck like y'all y'all fuck for hours i'm good for like maybe one to two after that i'm done good job high five but i'm going to bed you know or i was just gonna say the funny thing about that is so we're gonna talk we're gonna do a tempted episode we just got back from club tempted one of our takeovers but you literally went and got dressed i did yeah you had clothes on oh yeah yeah last night we were there having an orgy and lacy was like okay i'm done she got up when it got her drink got put her clothes on and came back and was like hanging out like yeah until until me and a couple other people finished yeah and i'm totally okay with that we get questions a lot of times like what happens okay let's see another example is like we're like in a four-way swap and the other guy comes but you don't and people like what do you do well you might sit there and watch you might get up get a drink go to the bathroom wipe off change your clothes like it doesn't have to be a big thing it can just be right if one guy comes and he's like if i was to come and i was done and the other guy wasn't like, I would be totally okay with you and the other girl having a threesome basically with that guy while I just kind of watched it, you know? And maybe if that continued long enough, I might get hard again and jump back in. You know what I mean? Or it depends on the vibe. So I think really the way it ends, you know what I mean? The way you kind of wrap it up is when everybody says they're done. Like when everybody like okay i'm exhausted i need to take a break i need to go get some food i need to go get a drink of water the club is closing you know whatever the thing is or i need to go to bed i'm tired like and everybody doesn't have to like if there's if it's a true orgy and there's multiple like some people can leave and some can stay that's fun too yeah it's not it's uh it's actually quite Especially in an orgy, it's very normal for like me or you. Like, oh, I'm going to go, I'm going to go, I've even like gone and taken a quick shower or gone and rinsed off or gone to the bathroom and, you know, came back and checked on you. Especially if I leave you with, you know, I wouldn't do that in a public orgy where we didn't have a bunch of friends there. But if we're in a-knit group where i trust everybody that's in the room like i'll totally go take a shower and come back and be like if you're still fucking or yeah or i'm not you know and i'm done or something like that and you you do the same way thing the other way around correct uh yes i think it really is just when you're done you're done and it kind of just go with it now i can see the i don't know if he's gonna come he's still fucking me i don't want to tell him to stop if he's trying to come like so just communicate you know just ask and i think that's okay too you could say like hey i'm good but if you want to come like yeah you could say like you could even use your spouse as an example he never comes in lifestyle sweating settings do you do you want to keep going like i'm totally down to make you come if i can you know like i am good but if you want to come i'm here for you yeah yeah and sometimes like the wife may have to come in and kind of if like they really if he really wants to come and you want to be a part of it like the like we've done stuff where dan's like fucked a girl and i like whisper dirty shit in his ears and then he would come you know like if we really yeah i can't even think mike and daphne like should be like on top of me fucking me and be like man i'm not sure if i'm gonna come like wait see come over here and like tell me some dirty shit yeah while she rides my dick and see yeah and sometimes i come and sometimes i'm like no it's not gonna yeah but i definitely in a lifestyle situation i wouldn't take it personal if the guy doesn't come it's pretty common no yeah i 100 agree with that but i think it is you know this is a good question it was a good subject something i don't know if i've ever really thought about before like talking you know so i love tuesday talks and listeners questions because something like this i don't know if we would have ever been like oh you know what we surely talk about how guys never come yeah in play settings we probably we might have mentioned it nonchalantly in some other um episodes but it's not really something we've spent a lot of time on talking about but i do think it's it's a setup for hurt feelings or it's a setup for confusion and i think putting it out there that um you can have great sex and the guy cannot finish yeah because you know i think even some girls i know there's you know we've focused a lot on the guy here but i know there are some girls that having orgasm especially from penetrative sex is difficult for them and and they are okay with not orgasming they're just enjoying the experience yeah correct i think it that's why i think it applies to both both partners so great question we appreciate it very much and i hope that helps answer it um i don't know there wasn't really like a definitive answer though it wasn't like after 15 minutes and 20 seconds and it's everybody needs to stop yeah the answers just go with the flow and if you are concerned or just communicate ask questions it's okay to be honest um and ask and that's okay right and if he's fucking you forever and you're like starting to get sore and you want to tap out it's okay to say i'm done like yeah i pretty much say that every play session i'm like i'm done literally goes until she's like okay i gotta tap out you guys yeah you're not breaking me i need to take a break yeah i know my vagina lemons i know when it's time to call it right but i think that's important to know that it's okay to communicate that to people and people and honestly if they get upset then fuck them fuck them and you probably shouldn't play with them again right yeah if somebody got mad about that like oh i'm not oh, I'm not done yet, it would be like, okay well, we are. And then that would be the last time we played with them. But most people are very understanding. It's probably not an issue you're going to encounter. Alright, I think that wraps it up. If you have a Tuesday Talks question, please send us an email at theswingnation at gmail.com We would love to hear from you. We we're gonna work on getting that voicemail and that phone number set up so you can sing us your tuesday talk jingles i think that'd be kind of fun i mean i think that phone's in the trailer still from from the weekend so we'll dig that out get it charged make sure the voicemail's set up and then next tuesday talks i guess we'll put out the phone number um maybe we'll post it on social media and stuff too and, too. I think it'd be kind of fun. We'll hold the phone up and let people sing their songs. What if nobody calls, though? I'll make one of our friends call. Like, Mike, call the number and leave a jingle. I'll call and leave one. So we don't look like we have no friends but yeah okay that's the plan if you have a question you would like for us to answer you can email us at theswingnation at gmail.com or drop us a DM on our social media email is the best because those tend to not get lost but we'll take them however we can get them alright I think with that in a world full of apples be the pineapple be the pineapple guys bye bye if you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us leave a five-star review wherever you're listening if you want to see more of our content you can find links, Instagram, OnlyFans, and more in the show notes. Come join the conversation with us and other Swinger content creators on our Swinger Society Discord server. If you have questions or feedback, email them to us at theswingnation at gmail.com. Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up to date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us, and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.
