Send us Fan MailLifestyle Education | Spice Up Your Bedroom: Great Sex Without Swinging | Episode 163In this episode of The Swing Nation Podcast, the top-rated lifestyle podcast about non-monogamy and swinging, Dan and Lacy offer advice to “vanilla” couples who are looking to add some excitement and adventure into their relationship without fully diving into the swinger lifestyle. Whether you re curious about spicing things up or just looking for fresh ideas to reignite your connection, this episode is packed with practical tips on how to introduce new experiences, increase intimacy, and keep things playful in the bedroom.Dan and Lacy also share the details of their perfect sexy date night, offering a glimpse into how they keep the passion alive in their relationship. Tune in to discover new ways to add a touch of thrill to your love life, and take your relationship to the next level without stepping fully into non-monogamy!- The Swing Nation - Main Website Quick Navigation Website: -- (Find all our social media links more!)- Swinger Society - Our Website to meet, connect events Swinger Society Discord Our Facebook Group- Swinger Websites -Kasadie 90 day free trialUsername: TheSwingNation SDC 14 day free trial Username: TheSwingNation** Use code 36313 for 14 days free! ** SLSUsername: NorthernGuynSouthernGirl- Merch More -Order Your Merch Here!- Lacy’s Fun Links -VIP OnlyFansPREMIUM OnlyFans-- THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS --Wisp : Making sexual healthcare inclusive, cost-effective, and accessible—for everyoneUse Code SWING at checkout for 15% off your oder!Shameless Care: ED Medication and at home STD testingUse Code TSN at checkout for $30 off your order!Promescent® Make Love Longer, It’s Time for Great SexUse Code SwingNation for 5% off!Sing it Bikinis: adjustable one-size styles, thoughtfully crafted to flatter every body type.Support the show- Thank you for the support! -
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This podcast is intended for adult audiences. Over the age of 18, it contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us, and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice.
welcome to the swing nation podcast a podcast by swingers for swingers where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe interview the experts learn and grow together. Join the nation. So, Lacey, people are asking, how do they get to go to a party or an event with us? They check out swingersociety.net. You create a profile, you sign up for an event, and you come hang out with us. Super easy. That's right.
If you want to party with us and the other faces and names that you know from social media and TikTok, head on over to swingersociety.net. Can't wait to see you there. Sexual health care can be so much more than STI testing. WISP offers services like emergency contraception, help in delaying your period, UTI treatments, and so much more. Thank you. health care can be so much more than STI testing. WISP offers services like emergency contraception, help in delaying your period, UTI treatments, and so much more.
They even have a product called the OMG Cream that helps provide more fulfilling orgasms for women. WISP provides same-day prescriptions and can give you discreet treatment in the comfort and privacy of your own home. Check out the link in our show notes or go to HelloWiz.com and use code SWING for 15% off. Most people have unprotected oral sex, right? Be honest. Now think about your last STD test. Did your doctor tickle your throat with something that looked like a giant Q-tip? Probably not.
Yet that's the only way to check for oral gonorrhea or chlamydia which are often asymptomatic you need a better doctor you need shamelesscare.com use coupon code tsn at checkout hey there pineapple people and welcome to the swing nation podcast we are your host northern guy and southern girl and today we're going to mix it up a little bit we're doing an episode for the vanillas out there we are for the non-swingers yeah this is the non-swingering swinger episode yeah does that make any sense no i think it does i think it's also for also good for maybe people that are thinking about being a lost self but are not quite there yet.
Right. So this is how to spice up your relationship with swinger-inspired tips. Yeah.
So we get messages all the time that are like, hey, me and my husband or me and my wife, we're not swingers, but we listen to your podcast and we love it and we like we like hearing your stories about the events and it's just we think it's really cool but we're not necessarily interested in swapping and becoming swingers we just like listening to your podcast yeah um and i do think you know there's a lot of things that once you open up and you become a swinger that you kind of realize you're like man why did I never do this or why have we never had these conversations or why have we never talked about this stuff before so I think if you are a monogamous person if you are a vanilla person I think there are things that you can learn from swingers and apply it to your life and maybe have a better more fulfilling sex life without necessarily doing the swapping part yeah all All right, so what we're going to talk about okay so when we say vanilla is just to kind of clarify that a little bit well if we say vanilla person or vanilla that means somebody that's not a swinger yeah uh and you'll hear the word vanilla in other lifestyles like bdsm people might say that um you know kinky people might say that uh you might hear that from like the lgbt community as well but when we say it basically we're just saying somebody that is not a swinger yeah that's what we're calling vanilla okay so lacy if you were going to take something that you've learned while being non-monogamous something that you've learned while being a swinger and recommend that to somebody that's not um what are the kind of things you think of when you think of that definitely our communication and how open we are with each other and how we're just comfortable sharing pretty much anything with each other about what we're into what we're thinking about all those things yeah it's funny our relationship kind of started that way um you know without going all the way through back it me and lacy met on a lifestyle app um and we lived over 500 miles apart at that time and so i both of us i think at the time but more so me was like hey this we can't be a serious relationship even though we had that spark we had that energy because just the practicality of it wasn't there um but because of that because we weren't looking to pursue an actual relationship we kept talking to each other and having long phone conversations i actually had like an hour drive to work and i'd call lacy every day and we'd talk on my drive um and because i wasn't thinking like i need to dupe this girl into falling in love with me, I told you everything.
Yeah. Like, all kinds of crazy stuff. I told you what I did, or who I fucked, or what my fantasies were, what kind of kinks and things I was into. We did some of those things. Yeah. Via text and video calls and things like that. But we started on a very open playing field.
Yeah, because we didn't think we were going to be together so we just like all the crazy things i was doing or things that i had done normally in a relationship if i was wanting the guy to like really like me i'm not going to tell him all my deepest dirtiest um things but with you i was just able to do that and so we started our relationship really based off of communication and i think that's really I'll see you next time.
things but with you i was just able to do that and so we started our relationship really based off of communication and i think that's really helped us throughout our relationship yeah so i guess why do we not feel comfortable sharing that kind of stuff with our partner normally well i think society at least i grew up in the south here in the south girls you know you don't want to have a lot of sexual partners you want to be you know i guess pure in some ways have some experience but not too much because you'll be a whore you want to be sweet and kind you don't you don't tell the guy oh i fucked four guys last night and it was really hot you keep all that hidden or at least that's how i was taught anyway and so i just think when we're getting into relationships it's not something you typically share yeah but even you know so if we're talking about vanillas so people that don't want to swap and fuck four guys but that could still be things like i want you to choke me yeah or i want you to pull my hair or i had a threesome in college you know but yeah so if you're fantasies i guess you're right if i think about why we don't talk about those things is from a very young age we're kind of taught taught you don't you don't talk about yes no i mean i grew up that way i never talked to my parents about sex it was just not something we talked about you learn just a little bit in health class and then it's like like you know you you start coming to those ages where you want to fuck somebody you just kind of figure it out you know i mean and we are the internet generation you know we probably could google some stuff and saw some stuff online but nowhere near what kids probably have access to nowadays but i always never understood that like why why do we pretend like this doesn't exist and just let people figure it out?
Yeah. And then what happens is what we're saying is now you don't even feel like you can talk to your partner. The person you love and the person you care about, the person you're sexually active with, you still feel like you have to kind of shelter yourself or pull a little bit of yourself back and not be completely honest with that person. Yeah. No, I totally agree. And, like, let's say we quit swapping and we quit being swingers. Thank you.
be completely honest with that person yeah no i totally agree and like let's say we we quit swapping and we quit being swingers all the fun things that we do we could still do we would just do it you and i like having sex in the woods or we had sex in a cave one time i'm trying to think of all the like fun kinky things that we've done throughout our lives it doesn't include someone else, just communicating about those things would be a huge step towards kind of fucking like swingers do in a way.
Yeah, so I think if you're a monogamous, one of the things that you need to do is work on your communication. And I think if you are in a loving relationship and this is your partner that you want to be with for the rest of your life you should be comfortable sharing your fantasies with that person so i would encourage you to sit down and say hey ask your partner what what are your fantasies and then and then tell your your partner what some of your fantasies are um you know what are some things you'd like to explore these are some things to explore. Oh, cool.
And have that not feel like, feel like you are free from judgment in that conversation. And maybe to start with one thing, like Dan and I have done podcasts where we both pick five fantasies and we come and we tell them to each other on the podcast. I've always been floored by that. But we usually plan it out. Like you'll say, okay, I need you to think of five fantasies before tomorrow. So that gives me like a day or two to really think hard about the things that I'm into. Maybe like give each other that assignment.
Like say, okay, this weekend, Saturday night, let's tell each other one thing we've always wanted to do that we've never done before. Or exchange a list or something.
Yeah, or fun you know give yourself some time don't just like ask them and then expect them to be able to like drop one at the top of their you know like right away we maybe give some time so people can like they can think about it and then it's you know it's always fun once you have those things to try to work on trying to do them right once you get that list together then once you both have your list kind of sit down and be like okay are these things we both consent to do and then are these things that we actually can do and maybe work towards checking off your that's what we would call a fuck it list yeah which i get like in this i don't want to jump ahead or anything um but life gets busy.
It gets busy for us. And so when you have like not a lot of time, but you have a list of like intentional things that you want to do, it's kind of fun to make those happen. Like if one of yours is to, I don't know, fuck on the beach or make out on a balcony. I don't know. It doesn't have an obviously. Like if you know you have a beach trip coming up, you can kind of like plan. And again, that's hot in itself, just like planning and communicating about those plans. No, I agree. I agree. Okay.
Now another thing that I really enjoy about the swingers lifestyle that I don't know if people in monogamous relationships do this enough, but it's the flirting aspect of it i know this is something that you you really enjoy i very much do but swingers you know they start group chats with other couples and so we're constantly like sending text messages and you know taking little nude photos when we get dressed or get out of the shower and send it to other couples and things like that. I think when you're in a long-term monogamous relationship, you sometimes forget to flirt with your partner.
You just take your partner for granted as this is somebody that I can have sex with when I want to, and I don't necessarily have to woo them or flirt with them or get them excited.
So I think monogamous couples could still do that yeah it always like i love like a good morning text some of that like we have worked long distance for years so the bulk of our communication was through like texting and flirting and that's one thing even now i really miss i love that and we could do a better job of that but definitely swingers do awesome at especially group messaging and messaging each other but you basically are wanting to date your spouse again yeah no so i think you know if you're a monogamous person um you know if your partner is you know if you go to the gym without your partner or something like that and you're getting in the tanning bed or you know about to get in the shower taking a little sexy photo and oh i'm thinking you know thinking about you or can't wait to get home or you know those kind of things um i think that could be could be kind of fun yeah no i totally agree leaving little notes by your bed trying to think of other things like a note on the the mirror with some lipstick you're trying to think of things a couple sub dunks we literally yeah we don't we're not very good at this i'm trying to think of things i've done in the past to be honest with you i've been betting better at it in relationships better at flirting with other men than you are yeah i think i was is it because we spend so much time flirting with other people um i think that i'm confident in our relationship and neither one of us are very we just don't have to do that and there's been relationships in the past that i felt like i really had to do that to kind of keep like i had to basically like drag sex out of somebody you No, so I like always trying to like figure out how i can yeah and i just feel comfortable and safe with you i mean if we have time great um there's you know i've like slipped a note in your suitcase when you traveled before and especially when you you're gone and come back i try really hard then but if you're just like always there yeah it's kind of hard but we sold a pair of panties into their suitcase yeah we've done that before that's a good trick that is a good trick yeah but i think um remembering to flirt with your with your partner with your spouse um is important and i think those those little texts i actually it's funny because now that we live together we used to text a lot we did and i really miss it yeah and honestly like when you're apart like that and you're texting it just you're more deliberate you're thinking about each other more you know i mean like for us it's you know we're in the same house together but you're doing laundry and you're cooking and you're cleaning and you're feeding the dogs and you know you're doing all that stuff um you don't really get that opportunity to lay in bed at night missing your partner you're like i'm thinking of you or give up the next morning to a good morning text yeah yeah i love that yeah you should do more than that you should text me more i'll try okay yeah all right what would be the third thing that you would recommend to a monogamous person um coming from non-monogamy what about like just adding things in like variety so like toys lingerie i mean just again more intentional things in your sex life yeah it is funny and i don't even think you know this is part swinging but i can even think um of us being content creators and doing like only fans videos and stuff we're constantly thinking of like what's something different we can do and we're thinking of that because we're like oh these people are paying a subscription each month to see videos they probably don't want to see the same thing every month right so how can we make change this up how can we make it a little different yeah sometimes that's bringing in a toy you know something like a motor bunny you know what's that the thrusting dildo toy what do you call it like a sex machine uh you know things like that um vibrators like you said lacy loves i mean lacy uses a vibrator almost every day uh so that's not really wouldn't be a new thing for us but if you're a couple that hasn't experiment with toys i think that could be i think coming from a previous vanilla person i think a lot of women use sex toys but not a lot of people use it together together yeah it's more of uh we're not having sex so let me take care of myself yeah yeah i think so or a single person but i will say if any ladies aren't men um bringing toys in the bedroom like when you're fucking as a couple is really amazing i love to be penetrated and come like with my clit at the same time and a wand with sex is like a whole new experience for me yeah that's how you you get to that like uh exorcism yeah it's just a different level of orgasm and there are so many really cool um toys that are out there i mean y'all could research that's again another way of like flex texting and flirting like research find toys that you're interested in um also, again, up in the beginning, we talked about fantasies, you talk about you, maybe you want to have anal sex, but you're scared, you know, showing anal toys to kind of help you get there, just stuff like that.
And then planning a date night, like maybe when your kids aren't there, like, we're gonna have a glass of wine, we're gonna try this new sex toy, or, you know, just anything like that, just to kind of keep it new and fresh, I think is a lot of fun.
No no i agree um there are other things you can do um you know like some bdsm things maybe you know maybe you're somebody that might be one of your fantasies you know when you guys listed them out might have been like to get tied up or to be restrained uh so i think you know yeah let's go out to dinner let's have a few glasses of wine I'm tying you up. You know what I mean? And then, like you said, I'm going to tie you up and then we're going to use this new toy. I just got off, um, Adam and Eve or whatever, whatever sex site, um, could be fun.
I think like you're saying, you know, here's a lot like, oh, you should plan something, being intentional about your play. And I think that's hard.
Even, even for us, it's hard to be like, okay, next Friday night, we're going to go on a date and we're gonna have amazing sex it's a lot of pressure yeah it is and then like one thing could fuck that up like you know you're stressed out you whatever you got in a fight you you know you name it um you scratch the car door on um something or you know whatever the case may be yeah um i think that can kind of derail that so i think you do have to be like plan a b c and d you know yeah but i do i do like that idea of we're going to plan a date night and this next friday date night and i'm going to tie you up we like going to the strip club that's kind of our go that is kind of there's not a lot to do in our town like sex wise so we'll go out and have like a nice dinner and then go to the strip Thank you.
a strip club that's kind of our go that is kind of there's not a lot to do in our town like sex wise so we'll go out and have like a nice dinner and then go to the strip club and spend like a hundred bucks um and tip or a couple hundred dollars and tip girls and then we talk about all the things that we would do to such girls later than not yeah yeah not in front of them no not in front of them but like you know but like sometimes we'll whisper you know we'll kind of like she's so hot we never have taken a stripper home like that we never even really talk to them that should be on our bucket list we then we don't even talk to them like we just kind of talk to that one about only fans yeah um and then we usually are like half fucking on the way home but that does it for us it kind of brings the spark back for us i don't feel like swingers or swingers i don't feel like strippers know what to do with a couple they don't know what to do with us we don't get like really approached much no especially not me they always talk to you yeah they do they probably learn that because they're probably used to jello like wives getting jealous and getting upset and so they always try to be super kind but i don't know i think i might scare them a little yeah because it's like we'll sit there and like we're like the only ones tipping like some other random dude will come up and give like a dollar and they're like all over this dude and i'm like are we like invisible like do they not even see us but i think it's because they're worried that they might they might piss you off i think that's what it is you went off on a tangent next time we should we should go strip.
This is a tangent. But next time we should go on a strip club together and you should go like sit away from me and like let me just go up by myself and see what happens. Oh, like let you go. And then come in. You know what I mean? Yeah. And see if it changes the way that you are. I don't know. But that's a good idea. Like that's something to do. Yeah. See? I know Daddy Mike and Daphne love going to restaurants and her flirting with the bartender or flirting with the people at the bar. You know, just kind of like they never take anyone home, but it just it's hot to them.
Like anything like that, whatever works for you would be super hot in this situation. Yeah, they're all about that. Yeah, they are.
She always likes to flirt with the young guys young guys yeah behind the bar well she's a cougar what do you expect okay i think now it's a terrific time to take a little break and hear from the partners and sponsors of the swing nation podcast and then when we get back we got a few more tips for you All right, guys, we'll be right back okay ladies there is this company called wisp and they're amazing you do not have to be a swinger to enjoy their um ease of use if you have a uti a yeast infection if you need birth control pills if you need face cream, like the prescription strength, anything like that when it comes to women's health, you can go on their website and literally do it from your phone.
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Part of keeping it kinky and fun in the bedroom is having all the right supplies promessant has my favorite lube that we've used it's the aloe vera base it's wonderful they have a ton of products that will make your sex life so much easier massage oils yes massage oils that would be a kinky way to start it yeah if you want to check out promessant products go to theswingnation.info and look for the promessence icon all right guys welcome back welcome back we appreciate you listening to our sponsors and we love our sponsors we do and our sponsors are good for vanillas they are there's plenty of you can get you some lube some massage oil get you some stuff from the wisp i mean there's all kinds of things that vanilla people can use our sponsors for uh okay i think another thing that we need to talk about if we're talking about things that we've learned in the swinger lifestyle that we wish more monogamous people um could take or could like learn from i think body positivity is probably up there on that list yeah i agree i've even had people say like we see like we're vanilla but we see how like confident and uplifting everyone is and we love that and we wish we had that i get that a lot from women yeah i think it's something about when you're in a community where sex is on the table for almost everybody that's like at an event you know you're like Thank you.
i get that a lot from women yeah i think it's something about when you're in a community where sex is on the table for almost everybody that's like at an event you know you're like you're everybody goes in with the mindset that like everybody in this room i could possibly have sex with it makes you a lot more nice it does it does and i think the women know how hard it is to sometimes walk out naked or pretty close so i think a lot of the women build each other up i think a lot of the men are super complimentary to the women because obviously they want to fuck up so i just think in all it's a great it's a great little situation they got yeah i think um and because you're kind of in this constant state of dating people and meeting new people, you're always trying to, like, impress them, you know what I mean?
So I think you do maybe, you know, take care of your body a little bit better. I know we need to actually go to the gym. We've been talking about that. We need to get a little healthier than we are right now at this moment, but that kind of stuff is always on your mind.
And I do think, you know, I've been, I was in a long-term monogamous marriage and we you do tend to kind of get comfortable maybe let yourself go a little bit yeah but i think that's normal it's 100 normal but just like any relationship when you're like wanting people to want to fuck you or you're wanting to date and look around you're gonna you're gonna try and make yourself look good i mean that's just kind of it. Yeah. So I think I've seen a lot of couples that have like gone on body transformation journeys together or made that a focus together. And I think that's all great stuff.
And I do think that like sharing pictures with each other, you know, complimenting each other's body, you know, maybe part of the reason if you, you know, are in kind of a sex slump, part of the reason it might be that you don't feel sexy yeah you know i mean because it's hard to have sex when you don't feel sexy um so i think it you know one setting some personal goals and going on a personal body transformation journey might be something that you can do but i also just think maybe something as simple as taking a picture and sending it to your partner and have him say oh my god you look so hot in that picture oh my god you're so beautiful could do a lot for somebody in the way that they view themselves um so i definitely think that's something another thing i think that um vanilla people can do um is these photo shoots yeah we hear all the time you know we're good friends with wings of glory who's a boudoir photographer um and that can almost be its own like life-changing event right yeah yeah i mean you hear people that that go to those and and really like you said it's almost it's almost like counseling or something and you can do a couples one so men if you're listening to this i know it's like well one what the hell do you do with those pictures and and two i'm i'm sure men especially are probably like oh hell no but it really like it's really amazing to see couples that that do these it's it's really hot and you might just be able to save those on your phone you might not be able to like hang them or do anything with them but um it's the experience in itself is really wonderful no i agree and you know you can post them i see not all of them are like x-rated no they're not but some people are very conservative you know like we even have in our house in our bathroom we have two pictures of me i'm like have more on than i would wear in a bathing in like at the pool but so you could you maybe could hang some or do something with them but it's it's really a confidence boost to go and have those pictures made yeah i think another thing if we're talking about bodies and visual and seeing each other um that we've kind of discovered in the swingers lifestyle that i think should be more universal is mirrors yeah right it's like when you fuck your partner and there's a mirror on the ceiling or there's mirrors on the wall being able to see almost like watch yourself have live porn that is that is pretty yeah arousing well question what about recording it like i hate to say that because i don't want anybody to get anything leaked do not come back at us and say well you told me to take a nude or told you to take a video but like hot little stuff like that will make you feel confident and then again it maybe you do it like you take a little video of yourself when you get out of the shower and your husband's already gone to work and you send him that like that's a huge confident boost no it is it's funny you know you talk about recording yourself um you know we're content creators now we make porn videos or whatever you want to call them um but i've found myself rarely watching porn anymore you know i mean like even if i need to like you know whatever we've been busy and i need to jerk off then come because i'm just feeling horny and i used to go to like you know one of the the porn sites and do that nowadays i usually open my camera roll and find some videos that we made and like let me watch that shit yeah it is a different level of sexy when you know the person in the video like or you know i mean like when you're like oh that moan i know that moan or that you know it just it's sexier to me so yeah it is funny that um i don't find myself watching other porn anymore it's usually all porn yeah that makes total sense to me okay so while we're on the subject of porn that's another way to enhance your sex life without necessarily going and fucking other people yeah have you ever watched we've watched porn together yeah yeah i've watched it in a couple relationships actually and that can be fun no it can be very very sexy nowadays you can stream it right to the big screen tv and yeah um so you know another way to talk about fantasies and stuff like maybe if you're not ready to do that maybe you could find a porn that incorporates some of those fantasies and watch it together and like kind of lead it into your sex for the night that could be hot yeah we've had you know nights where we've been like you know what like we got no kids in the house tonight like let's put on let's you know put on a little porn and and have and have some fun yeah and we do it like right in the go down on the couch put the screen that thing right to the big screen tv watch it it usually doesn't last very long usually we're fucking like for sure pretty quickly but uh it can be hot yeah i can so for the listeners lacy if you were to watch porn oh god and you were to go into the search what would you type now everybody's gonna say this to me what would you type in i watch rough lesbian porn you always always not not it's like exclusively what you watch when you watch porn yeah unless i open it and like something just you know like when you open it there are a few videos for you page yeah if something there grabs my attention i might just click on that but if i'm sorry like i usually kind of go down and if nothing jumps at me and i have to like search something that's what i type in i like watching girls being like ate out and i don't like soft little simple like because you know you get these like porn girls that are not real lesbians and they just like barely lick i want to see a girl like go at it that's what i like so you want like and it's the oral is that you like it's the oral yeah so you like watching rough lesbian oral porn and that's what gets you off it is that's interesting what would you type uh i usually do i do do group sex and stuff like that uh i do watch a lot of like rough like the kink stuff yeah i do like if i don't type in lesbian i'll sometimes watch like real like man and woman rough sex right yeah like little kinky yeah like the girl's tied up and has like a you know see i don't want bdsm i just won't like they're it's like a passionate fuck like a forced orgasm, that kind of thing.
Yeah, kind of, yeah. Yeah. Or fucked up, babe.
I can watch this about anything though i basically scrolled that for you page and just find something that like yeah i don't really have like a go-to i just knew that you have like that is your so now everybody's gonna be like oh you want to watch some lesbian porn maybe you'll get a girl that wants to give you some rough oral i mean that sounds good to me i don't know i support it i support it we went off on a tangent again that's okay uh okay what about mutual masturbation we do this quite often and actually i thought about it after we passed the sex part and i almost brought it back up there's some nights that I don't want to have a whole lot of sex.
Like, I just really want to come and go to bed. Yeah. And that's okay. You know, it doesn't always have to be this, like, grand, huge thing. Wow. So, a lot of times, we'll lay, like, almost in a 69 position, and we will masturbate and come together.
No.'ll like i'll come a bunch because it's easy for me to come and then i'll help you finish i like when we're doing the mutual masturbation thing i want your pussy like in my face like i want to see you touching that's kind of why we're in that position when you're coming i want to see like you contract i want to see i want it like 3d like all up in your business we do that quite often that makes me come usually pretty quick sometimes we'll even even have sex and then finish that way just because there's a lot going on you're right um so they're you know talking about mutual masturbation if you're somebody that's like exhausted when it's time to go to bed there are times you're like i don't want to get on top i don't want to get on top i'm too tired i'm exhausted but you're like i'm still horny you're like i just want to come it's like okay let's put some porn on the tv let lacey put on a rough lesbian sex and then just kind of jerk off together you know i mean um that's that's kind of sexy that's hot that can be a good time yeah no i totally agree um what about like coming up with like new ways to have sex like watching podcasts reading books stuff like that just to kind of like kind of help introduce new ways of doing it i think all that's good i think because you kind of if you don't know you don't know right you know if you've only had missionary or doggy style sex and you don't know there's all these things out there you definitely can look them up and I get not everyone wants to google this shit on the internet we do we google all of it um but it can really open your eyes to some of these really cool things even like like a tantric massage something like that where you are learning about your bodies and how to put them in different ways no yeah i can't remember there was a couple that you know um was new to swing and they said the way they got into it is listening to our podcast and they were literally like laying in bed every night and put an episode on they would listen through the episode and then after the episode was over they'd like talk about it together okay like what did you think about that what did you think about this and they They would listen through the episode.
And then after the episode was over, they'd talk about it together. Like, what did you think about that? What did you think about this? And they would just talk about the episode. And they said they did that for a while. Oh, wow. Before they actually came to the first event. Decided that this was for them and things like that. I always thought, wow. I thought, one, that's really cool. And what a great relationship you guys have.
That you put that much time and and that much effort into it we're that deliberate about it um so like that i think you could take something like that and maybe you know if you're not interested in swinging you don't want to listen to our podcast but there are several other sex positive podcasts there's several podcasts on how to like reignite your sex life and how to do you know different sexual acts and sexual things so i totally think you could listen to one of those podcast episodes and then maybe at the end either do it or talk about it or you know whatever the thing may be but uh could definitely help spice up your sex life for sure and you can make it even like you could even say okay we're each going to find a new position this week and then this weekend we'll try them like figure out which one you want to try so you can make it fun and you can like flirt and use it throughout the week so like or be like come up with i could find something that's like crazy that i don't really want to do and like flirt with you by like sending it to you i'm like oh yeah we're gonna do this like jokingly okay so what's if we were to plan let's plan've been married now, how long have we been married?
It'd be four years. Four years, all right. Like 10 days. And we got our parents living with us now. Yeah. We're basically nursing assistants. We clean up all the things. Our regular life can be very, very unsexy.
So let's plan a night me and you all right next friday okay we're gonna go out and we're gonna have we're gonna set up a sexy time what does that look like all right what do you want to do next friday first i want to go to dinner like a nice dinner okay what's not like red lobster no um like a local not like logan's but like a local like like seafood steak yeah but not yeah not red lobster you want yeah not a chain like a local restaurant i can think of a few yeah we're not gonna say them give away where we live but okay yeah and then and i want to dress up but not like fancy because i don't want to stress you know i don't want to wear a dress and dress and heels.
I don't want to do any of that. But I do want to like look nice and dress up a little bit. So when you say dress up but not fancy, what is that? Like maybe jeans and heels. Jeans and heels? Yeah. What? Like some kind of shirt? Yeah, like a bodysuit, sweater or something. But sexy but, you know. Low cut? Yeah, sexy but still covered.
Okay i can envision i can envision that what i'm wearing just like jeans and a polo that's what is ideal for your night well i don't know i'm trying to look good for you oh yeah that sounds good yeah jeans and like a polo yeah all right so we're gonna go i'm probably gonna get steak yeah you're going to get like crab legs. Maybe. Shrimp. Fried shrimp. Maybe. Chicken. All right. Okay. That's going to cost me 150 bucks. Yeah, for sure. Okay. Now what are we doing? And then I want to go to the strip club because I love going. We go like maybe five times a year. So we don't go that often.
But it's so much fun. It is fun. Like it's kind of cheap and kind of redneck. You almost never see couples. Well, there's a few couples. We've seen a few couples, but you don't see couples in there a lot. I think strip night, date night should be more of a thing for couples. It's fun. I like to talk, you know, like when the girls talk to us, which is very rare, they talk to me more. I like drinking the shitty alcohol and.
The Smirnoffs, isn't that what terrible they don't sell out liquor um but i just i don't know it's just fun for me it kind of gets me going like it like starts the night for me and there's boobs yeah no but they can't can they take their bottoms off here i don't know i can't remember i don't think i've seen too many pussies at the strip club here i don't know i don't honestly i don't know but i mean they're basically wearing g-strings i mean yeah you can almost yeah but you kind of get you going get your blood flowing a little bit gets you kind of turned up okay all right so we go to strip club then what what then what's gonna happen go home and go right right straight to it yeah like i like this is not safe but like pretty much like making out like passion like we're making out i've got my hands in your pants while you're driving right so the last time we went to the strip club i believe you gave me a blowjob on the way yeah that's what to say you wanted to try to fuck me yeah and i'm like i feel like a little road head and probably my truck is it's got like that high console in the it's not the best, like, blowjob or sex truck.
No. They need to bring back the bench seats. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like, a bench seat in the front seat of a truck, that's a sex truck. Yeah. That's meant for. Well, just, I like the passion. The, like, we can't get to the bed quick enough situation. I really like that. So, blowjob on the way home, we get home, and then we're fucking. We're basically fucking as we're walking through the door. Okay. And now, when we get home, and we fuck, what, is there, like, a position you want? All of them. We're fucking on the couch, we're fucking in the bed, like, where are we going?
Yeah, no, I think we start fucking as soon as we walk through the door. Right, so couch, probably. Kitchen counter? I mean, anything, you know? Kitchen counter is hot.
Our kitchen counter is a little bit hot for us though like yeah i feel like i have to get like up on my tiptoes a little bit it's not like ideal height but it's definitely doable i'm a little turned on a little turned on okay now another one i like is the couch but like you bent over the side of the side yeah that's a good like yeah doggy position yeah just like all the things like we're throwing clothes as we're walking through the door it's just like passionate you know we fuck all the places we might even take a break we have cameras in our living room so like i love going back and going back and watching it yeah that's really hot we should do an only fans video that's just we should we should do this yeah this date night thing that we have planned here and then sell that and then sell the actual only video that's not a bad idea um but yeah just like and not rushed like because i'm not like i don't mind having a lot of sex but i need breaks you know like maybe get a little snack and drink wait a while put some porn on maybe put some porn on and then and continue a little more okay until you're just until we're exhausted yeah or i come yeah and then we'd like sleep naked around arms around each other all night that sounds like a good that sounds like a good friday night yeah i like it i sound like a good friday night i.
I am down for that. And there was no third person. No. There was no swingers. There was no orgies. There was no, I mean, those are all good things too. But that, okay. I can dig that. That sounds like a good sex night. Maybe like a new toy thrown in there that we already had on the counter waiting for us. What is it? I don't know. Oh, okay.
I'm'm just saying maybe we had prepared is there any toys that you don't have that you'd like to try um i saw that toy that um what is their name i can't think i can't think of it anyway it's a couple she sent us a video and it's like a butt plug and then it like sucks her pussy or something yeah that was very interesting yeah yes was that new swingers on the block that sent that no i don't know who it was i know what you're saying but yeah it was yeah yeah it was super hot um so like i was like that like can you be the one because it was like a butt plug and then the butt plug had an attachment that like came up and ran was just it just on her pussy on her clit i don't know but it seemed apparently like when you the butt plug vibrates but when it vibrates it like vibrates your clit too i did but to me and you to have sex with that yeah no it'd be like more of a foreplay thing like you get me you know it'd be hot is if you wore that to the strip club like i'm on all fours you're leaving it up you're putting it in me we should have you wear a butt plug next time to the strip club that's actually really hot okay it'd be even hot if it was a remote like vibrator yeah i don't know if we have one of those i don't think we do um but like you kind of do it for me but like any any toy like maybe we haven't used it yet but we have it there stripper to push the button i bet they would yeah but they would that would be a fun thing like let's see if we can talk when you push my button like just don't tell them what it's for they'd be like oh what's that for and be like yeah just push it and i'm like oh babe what we're a little fucked up okay so what's next that's it that's it well you said toy and oh okay but that's it for our day night yeah we'd fuck until i came or you tapped out yeah and we would uh go to bed yeah uh perfect that sounds like a great night All right.
We got a little bit of time left. Let's talk about some of our upcoming events. So that kind of concludes our, if you're not a swinger, if you're a vanilla and you want to have a sexy date night, you know, maybe take our idea, right? Go out to food, go to strip club, come back and fuck each other. Make sure you get it caught. Catch it on your security cameras so that you can.
Watch it back the next night and fuckive that moment yeah uh okay i hope that helps hope you if you're a vanilla you got some some good advice for that um i will say i think we had a homework assignment uh written on our our list here when we did our show notes oh we did and our homework assignment is um to encourage you to make a fantasy jar yeah where each of you writes down a few so maybe do like two or three like three write down three of your sexual fantasies put them into a jar and then on some random night when you have some free time when you're in the right mood when the kids haven't been driving you crazy and you don't need to you're not you know you're feeling sexy reach into that jar pick out a thing and then give it a try yeah um i think that's a good idea i think we should do that i think i think so too i like that make a little little sex fantasy jar yeah i like it okay is it i think we would struggle to make keep ours monogamous though yeah we would so like how who are we gonna do this with right yeah which makes it a little more difficult you'd have to plan it out a little bit but either way uh all right so we got some some upcoming events so if you are a swinger or maybe you just want to come on a date night to a lifestyle event you do not have to be lifestyle people to come out to lifestyle parties they definitely are a safe place they are sex positive they are body positive but you don't have to be a swinger to attend correct so our next big event is going to be at club tempted in louisville kentucky it's december 13th and december 14th and it is our winter wonderland weekend so the themes are frozen fantasy and glacial glow so a lot of white a lot of glow think snow boots um like sexy like white fur sexy winter wonderland yes correct a sexy winter wonderland friday night is literally just like the sexy winter wonder yeah and then saturday night night is sexy winter wonder.
It's like. But make it glow. But glow. Yeah. Which the cool thing is like pretty much everything white glows. So that's pretty easy. If you've never been to Tempted, it's a pretty awesome club. It's got a little bit for everyone. And it's a huge club. Like it can fit like 400 plus people. Yeah. It's huge.
No, I'm super excited about that party dj life of spice is djing um we're probably gonna put the stage on the dance floor again i think we're gonna do it again yeah uh we got a bunch of fun stuff planned we have the bdsm people are gonna come in the dom life um i think they're actually gonna do a some kind of a um vlogging demonstration on the dance floor that's cool on saturday night so lots of fun things planned definitely um if you ain't got much going on in december go to swingerside.net get those tickets that event's going to sell out they always do um so get your tickets now get them early um and we look forward to seeing you there um we got some more stuff We do.
Our big trips trips for 2025 they've been announced but it's we're kind of closing out 2024 in the next you know few months so if you are wanting to go on the bliss cruise hedo some of those major trips next year now is the time to purchase those they make great christmas gifts men wink wink um or maybe the ladies want to buy it um we will be at on the april bliss cruise and then we will be at hito in july in july i was looking for the exact dates it's like the last week of july so the 26th through of july through august 2nd it is young swingers week so there's a lot of really cool groups going now if you're 50 you are still a young swinger we're 40 it's more about the vibe not necessarily your actual age yeah yeah because i'm i was a little afraid that might scare people off it's that doesn't mean like 20 year old young at heart young at heart yes if you're cool with like edm music and dancing and partying and that kind of thing then this is definitely going to be your vibe if you are more of like sit in a lounge smoke a cigar and have whiskey this is probably not your vibe although it's hito so then there's a cigar lounge there is true but i just true but i just hito's big enough of a resort where you can do whatever you want yeah that's true that's true but i just don't want people to think that because they're 40 50 that they're not 60 70 80 bring them all bring them all if you're young at heart and you want to come party with us we would love to have you come to our hito takeover and most of these trips you can make payments they have a little way or payment plans so definitely i will say we just had friends book the april bliss cruise and there's only they only could find interior rooms yeah and not many interior rooms so that cruise is about to sell out so yeah definitely if you're thinking april bliss and you haven't booked yet um go to swimmerside.net put down your down payment start your payment plan um lock it in now because you wait another couple months you might you might not be able to get on that ship yeah uh and if you can't make it april definitely november on bliss cruise come on out and party with us um january we're going to be in collette's in dallas you you texans have been asking us to come to texas for three years now yeah all right so we made it happen we got with john and jackie and said we need to come to texas we need to throw a swinger society party we love colette clubs they're they're some of the best lifestyle clubs with some of the best reputations in the lifestyle um can we work something out and they're like hell yeah on out here.
We had a little sleepover with them in Houston. We did. Worked out the details and we're making it happen. So mark your calendar. Do you have the dates on that or sometime in January? Yeah, it's in January. Check out swingersidey.net for everything that we have listed. You can book it right through there. All right. Well, we can't wait to party with you.
Vanillas, I hope this Swinger Tips and Tricks helps Spice up your book it right through there so all right well we can't wait to party with you um vanillas i hope this swinger tips and tricks helps uh spice up your sex life yeah um you know if you try some of the things maybe maybe you like it maybe you want to venture a little further and uh you know maybe maybe come to an event or a party uh i hope you do that yeah we'd love to see you there we would i think with that in a world full of apples be the pineapple be the pineapple guys bye bye if you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us leave a five-star review wherever you're listening if you want to see more of our content you can find links to snapchat, Twitter, Instagram, OnlyFans, and more in the show notes.
Come join the conversation with us and other Swinger content creators on our Swinger Society Discord server. If you have questions or feedback, email them to us at theswingnation at gmail.com. Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up to date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us, and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.
