Send us Fan MailThe Swing Nation PodcastReal-Life Swinger Stories: The Swing Nation Story | Episode 71In this swinger podcast episode, Dan and Lacy recap how The Swing Nation Podcast came to be. They reminisce posting one explosive Tiktok, transforming them from a private lifestyle couple to public figures and advocates in the swinger community. From producing a top-rated podcast, managing one of the largest online swinger communities, and hosting lifestyle events across the country, this is the wild ride of The Swing Nation Podcast. _______________ - The Swing Nation - Main Website Quick Navigation Website: -- (Find all our social media links more!) Follow us on Facebook! The Podcast Website_______________ - Swinger Society - Our Website to meet, connect events Swinger Society Discord Our Facebook Group_______________ - Swinger Websites - SDCUsername: TheSwingNation** Use code 36313 for 14 days free! ** SLSUsername: NorthernGuynSouthernGirl_______________ - Merch More - The Swing Nation Merch The Swinger Pride Flags Swinger Society Merch_______________ - Lacy’s Fun Links - VIP OnlyFans PREMIUM OnlyFans _______________ -- THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS -- Shameless Care: ED Medication and at home STD testingUse Code TSN at checkout for $30 off your order! Promescent® Make Love Longer, It’s Time for Great SexUse Code SwingNation for 5% off! Pinaq Liqueur; The Official Drink of The Swing NationUse Code TSN at checkout for 15% off! Non-monogamy Couples Course and Single Guy Mastery CourseUse Code ATLANTA for 50% off!Support the show- Thank you for the support! -
Transcript
This podcast is intended for adult audiences. Over the age of 18, it contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us, and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice. Welcome to the Swing Nation podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers, where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle.
Come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe, interview the experts, learn and grow together. Join the nation. Lacey, we get approached by couples all the time and they want to know, like, where can they learn the one-on-ones of non-monogamy? Yeah, I totally get it. You want to get in the lifestyle, but you just don't know where to start. We recommend Sex by Sue's class on non-monogamy.
i totally get it you want to get in the lifestyle but you just don't know where to start we recommend sex by sue's class on non-monogamy she really helps couples learn how to communicate and do the lifestyle the correct way yeah i think this lifestyle you know it's crucial not to to step on the landmines that a lot of us do yeah and you kind of learn the hard way you know so having a class can take online, you know, in the privacy of your own home and kind of learn the ins and outs, learn, you know, how to approach the lifestyle, how to communicate with your partner about it.
You know, I think it's something worth taking and we highly recommend it. Yeah. So click below in the show notes. You'll find this link for that course. Check it out, guys. Bye. Most people have unprotected oral sex, right? Be honest. Now think about your last STD test. Did your doctor tickle your throat with something that looked like a giant Q-tip? Probably not. Yet that's the only way to check for oral gonorrhea or chlamydia, which are often asymptomatic. You need a better doctor. You need shamelesscare.com. Use coupon code TSN at checkout.
So Lacey, people are asking, how do they get to go to a party or an event with us? They check out swingersociety.net. You create a profile, you sign up for an event, and you come hang out with us. Super easy.
That that's right if you want to party with us and the other faces and names that you know from social media and tiktok head on over to swingersociety.net can't wait to see you there hey there pineapple people and welcome to the swing nation podcast we are your hosts northern guy and southern girl in today's episode we're gonna do a little little swing nation recap we are so we know that not everybody has listened to this is our 71st episode 71 yeah yeah so we know that not everybody is like that's a lot for somebody to find us and go back and listen to 71 episodes to kind of know our whole story and i think sometimes we forget that that people just know all the things about us so for like an end of the year kind of like to tie up 2022 i thought it would be a good idea to just do a podcast on like who the heck are these people right so this is episode one re rehashed yes so if you if you're just coming in and you're just founding us this is kind of an hour-long version of who we are and why we're here and how we stumbled upon this crazy yeah and i, and I think that's a good idea because I think it's changed since episode one.
It has. It's been quite the journey. I mean, it's only been like a year and a half, but dang, I feel like there's been a lot of stuff going on. There's been a lot of changes. Yeah. I don't think when we recorded episode one, I don't think we ever thought, I don't think we envisioned this. No, I didn't even know if anybody would ever listen to a podcast. Right, at that time you were like, Dan's crazy, but I'm just going to go with it. That's kind of our personality. You come up with these wild and crazy ideas, and I tell you you're crazy, but I kind of go along with it.
Kicking and screaming sometimes, and it usually ends up successful. It does, it does.
my batting average is pretty decent it is you are yeah i'm trying to remind myself of that as i'm kicking and screaming i'll do it for you if you forget oh he will trust me all right so question one who who are you my name is lacy i am a swinger i'm your wife um i'm a mom how old are you i'm 38 where are you from ish southeast u.s we don't um say our exact locations because there's crazy people out there so few hours from nashville let's just what i said yeah i feel comfortable with that yeah um 38 um i started swinging i would say probably six or seven years ago so roughly 31 32 somewhere in there um so yeah that's me who are you who am i my name is dan yeah i'm also 38 years old yeah a little little info about us we are one day apart 36 hours to be exact so my birthday is one day and yours is the very next she's the first older woman i've ever oh hush it you like older women everybody robbed the cradle of this one oh by 36 hours yeah uh and i'm from the north from new england is usually what i say when people ask me but about, you can't get much more north than where I'm from.
Yeah. So we kind of had two different upbringings. Yeah. So how did we meet? Yeah. So I have also been in the lifestyle for six, seven years.
And that's actually the story of Dan and Lacey is somebody mess somebody messaged me on a swimmer app i did so we were both on sls which is swing lifestyle if you're not familiar it um and i saw his profile picture i couldn't see his face it was just like his chest shirtless and it was that was probably a few a few pounds ago yeah we're married now um so i messaged you which i didn't typically message a lot of guys on the app really i was a unicorn and there was a lot of guys that a couple's got single guys couples i mean i was popular what can i say so i didn't have to, but I did see your profile.
I did happen to see that we were the same age in the same city. And that's kind of what I went in with. I was like, Hey, what stood out to you? So what, like why with all the people, all the dudes, all the couples on that profile and you showed me your profile once you had like 500 or a thousand unread messages. Yeah. I had a lot of it.
I don't know don't know what was there wasn't anything that where you're like well you were not overweight you are not hairy um you you know you were my age which you know a lot of the guys were either really young or really old like that middle like that mid 30s because at the time we were like young 30s yeah yeah um there wasn't a whole lot in that age bracket i don't know just something about you just kind of stood out right um so i messaged him i shoot my i shooted my shot how do you say i shit my shot you did not shit your shot now i'm trying to think of it in my head you have me so messed up from the way you said it i.
I shooted my shot. You took a shot. You took your shot. You took my shot. And I messaged you. And you responded back. And then we quickly went over to kick. And I can remember very early on that you were, appeared to be like very dominant.
And you even asked me, I don't know if we've ever talked about this publicly but you even asked me what like my limits were and i was like googling what limits were yeah and like like paraphrasing it like into a kick to to try to impress you well it's funny because i thought you were fake like when you messaged me you know if anybody's been on sls or any of these Swinger websites before, you know, or any social media platform. When a cute chick messages you nine out of ten times, it's like spam or a bot or somebody trying to get you to buy. First of all, you couldn't even see my face.
So, how did you – you didn't know if I was cute or not. Literally, all you – it was – my profile picture was me and, like, a white tank top. Yeah, but it was – I don't know if it was wet or you could kind of see through it. You could see through it.
I mean, it was my profile picture was me and like a white tank top yeah but it was i don't know if it was wet or you could kind of see through it i mean it was a hot physique yeah so nine out of ten times when a hot physique messages you it's somebody trying to scam you in some way shape or form is there that many scammy people i don't know about well there are on more so on open social media but yeah there's some on there too as well. Yeah. At least back then. So we kind of hit it off immediately. Yeah. Would you say? And I went to your hotel room night one. Which is, okay, ladies.
If you're a unicorn, this worked out for me. But like maybe don't do what I did.
But I went to your hotel room in my pajamas yes but i was a gentleman and i said we're not gonna we're not gonna fuck on our first day well and the reason why is we had both fucked other couples that day that makes it sound less gentlemanly but so when you invited me over to your hotel room i was like i can come well we weren't gonna meet we were like planning something for later in the week and then somehow it came up like like what are you doing tonight and i think we were both very honest and it's like well i kind of have something going on today yeah yeah we both had plans with other couples but we were like we still kind of wanted to see each other so we ended up ended up you came out over to my hotel that night yeah late like it was totally like a booty call hour it was like 11 o'clock and i ended up staying the night with you you did and you had to get up because you so a little backstory he was in my town for working work so he had changed his profile location to my city and i had no idea like i just thought you live there it all came out in conversation yeah but come to find out you were there for work um so you actually had to get up and go to work the next morning pretty early and you were like well you can say the night don't rob me no i said you can sleep i have to get up early and go to work you can feel free to stay and sleep in you don't have to get up and leave when i leave but But don't rob me.
Just don't steal my shit. You did say that. Don't steal my shit. Mostly joking, but a little not joking. I mean, really the only thing I had was a computer. I mean, I did open your wallet and look at your ID at some point. I know. You didn't. Well, I was going to say, there's no way you did that after I left because I had it with me. No, I did it like, I don't know, when you were in the bathroom or something. Like, I wanted to see what your real name was. See?
And this is why I was skeptical of you because apparently you went through my wallet when i wasn't looking but we honestly just had like a really great week um there was never any plans to like like either like be in a relationship or anything like that it was very much we had a good time and if you ever came back to the city, we would meet up again. Yeah, I don't think we had. I mean, we knew we were both lifestyle people that were single, and we knew that basically the lifestyle for us was fun. And that was kind of the way we interpreted, I think, our time together at that point. Correct.
And I was very much like, oh, well, he'll probably come into my city a few times a year, and can meet up and have a week of hot sex and then he'll go about his way right that was the plan i was just going to use you so that's how we met come to find out like long story short we ended up staying in contact even after he left and really formed a friendship yeah because we were both single in the lifestyle and we were both were trying to navigate you know we had been divorced um and we were like would we ever get remarried not to each other we were not talking about that but just you know like what does the future look like for us individually and because of that i think we were able to really like share like deep feelings outside of relationships it was more friendship level and truth be told I really fell for Dan um he took some convincing because we did live eight hours like five six hundred miles apart like he had pretty much written me off for a relationship like this is not gonna work you know, live too far um and i agreed with him but i guess maybe i was a hopeless romantic and he wasn't but i was like we can make this work yeah well so you know we both had come out of long-term marriages i was married for 13 years you were married for what seven years something like that yeah i truly at the time i think we connected you know i was a single lifestyle and I was really like you know I had been married for 13 years and I just want to have fun and I think part of me was like because this marriage had failed I was almost like I'd given up on that and I wasn't looking for that I was very like I don't I don't know like you know I mean like yeah you told me you never wanted to be married again and I was very honest that I did want to get married I didn't know what that looked like I didn't know if that meant like a swinger marriage if that was non-monogamous if that was I didn't know and I was like us talking and getting to know each other you know I was kind of trying to figure that out for myself you know I was in I was in therapy at the time and I was like you know what what does future look look like for me?
Because now I've embarked on this amazing lifestyle. And honestly, I couldn't imagine my life without it. So I was like trying to figure out how to do it. And at the time you had like an hour drive to and from work. So usually on your way home from work in the afternoons, we would chat for your whole drive. And it became very much like a really fun time in my day. Like I would look forward to you driving home because I would get to spend an hour chit-chatting and we would just talk about everything and anything. Yeah. And I think that's, what's unique.
You know, if I had to go back and say kind of, how did we form this unique relationship? It's because we, we both went into it with no expectations.
So, you know you know normally when you court somebody you kind of put your best face forward and maybe you kind of skip over some of the the nitty-gritty you know some of the details you you know that aren't so flattering in your life yeah and I think because we had no real expectations of having a long-term relationship together we just kind of laid it all out there and we're brutally honest with each other at times especially I think from my side yeah um and I think it it allowed it allowed us to connect in a way I think you know you don't normally connect when you're courting somebody no I totally agree and over the months um because the next time I saw you was like four or five months later like so over these months i really started to fall for you and typical for our relationship i was like so can i have your phone number because we were communicating via via kick yeah so i was like can i have your phone number can i be for you on facebook like i slowly slowly clawed your way into my life my life is what you did and somehow we we met um we we met back up so it was pretty September so we're talking about four or five months and I think that when we finally saw each other again I think we just kind of knew I think I told you I love you then you did yeah you had already told me I had already told you that um but it just something clicked and i think we just kind of knew this was gonna be hard but we were gonna have to just figure it out somehow and so that's what we did we just um we honestly just rearranged our lives um to make it work and two years later we got married yeah and to be fair you know i say you clawed your way into my life and it wasn't because I wasn't interested in you it was it was more because you are realistic I had this practical like this isn't gonna work I don't want I don't want you know I don't want to hurt you I don't want to hurt me like realistically there's no way for this relationship to it doesn't make sense it doesn't make yeah because I wasn't willing to move you couldn't move um so there was a lot of a lot of hurdles in our way and we knew that like we were very realistic okay this are these are all the things that are going to keep us apart but we really worked hard to overcome each obstacle and we did we did it um two years of dating we got engaged in a load within like a month or two of each other and uh we lived in las vegas nobody knew it was a great time we were married by elvis presley it's a great time yeah now here we are what five four five years later and we're finally of moving in together we are so you are new we are literally this month is um we've now been together for like three weeks full time so um that now we're in a whole new adjustment we made it though babe we did it yeah we'll see if we make it oh hush it it's not over yet okay so that's the story of us um what how the hell did we get into this this media social media world like how did we go from just like a regular swinger couple to here right and this you know i think we're going to tell the true story of this right and we've always told we've told this many times before but um it wasn't like we had some epiphany someday and we're like we are going to become lifestyle advocates and we're going to try to change society to make um swinger swinging more acceptable you know we didn't come into it with that mindset or goal it's actually much much a much cheaper version if we had tried to do that we would have never been successful no you know uh so what what happened was I was away for work i was uh overseas so um for a job and i was gonna be gone for four months and so at this time me and lacy um you know we'd been together we were married yeah we were married uh you know and so we had been swingers and we knew we were both very sexual people and sex is a big part of our life we have sex almost every day you know we're swingers we go to these parties and stuff um and so we we were kind of looking at this us being apart and how we were gonna navigate that as far as you know right finding enjoyment with each other um while being separated yeah because we only play together so we knew that um this was going to be for basically four months of no sex with other people only ourselves right uh and we were very open you know i said hey if if you think that you need to have sex with somebody you know that's something we can talk about if you ever get to a point where you feel like you need that we can have a conversation and you know i wasn't really in a situation where i could do that but if there was an opportunity and i felt i needed to do that you kind of told me the same the same thing so but we we didn't want to do that we really wanted to somehow connect with each other virtually um and so at the time you know this is uh you know during covid yeah only fans everybody was starting only fans it was kind of like a thing and a trend that everybody was doing um and we're like well that could actually work because essentially you can upload and post pictures and make little sexy posts and then well and i was already doing that because you were gone so at this point you had already right you were messaging me you were you know emailing me or texting me whatever different videos and messages and stuff like that trying to keep the spice alone right so we were like well if you do you can put it all on only fans not only can i enjoy it but other people you know couples guys girls whoever will enjoy it we we can both see that and get some enjoyment out of that as well as you know kind of share with each other and actually i started only fans too shortly after you did it just like three people signed up and so it was too much work and we stopped it but so that's really why we started you know that's why we started OnlyFans and then because I was bored and had a lot of time on my hands I started researching like how to get subscribers on OnlyFans and that's when the concept of TikTok came up which we were both on TikTok because you know like during COVID that's what everybody did you just scrolled so like i was super familiar with tiktok but not actually making videos i just watched everybody else's yeah so this is what early 2020 so like my idea of tiktok was like this is something that like my kids are on like teenagers are on it's not like an adult app but we did start using it and we actually did find a couple swingers that were on there talking about the lifestyle yeah i think i found them and i kept telling you i'm like there's you know there's like a whole different side of tiktok like swing talk like that and i felt like we could do it better and i mean that no disrespect to anybody that was on before us but i just kind of was like i didn't relate to anybody that i saw on social media on tiktok they didn't look like me they didn't talk like, you know, they just, they, I didn't relate to anybody that i saw on social media or on tiktok they didn't look like me they didn't talk like you know they just they i never saw kylie and christina which i know they were on tiktok prior to it um i was talking about other people because i could i could have related to them on some levels um i was talking about people that were you know 10 15 years older than me and stuff like that like their content didn't relate to me and i felt like for us we could do a little bit better than them yeah so we we decided hey this kind of goes along you know we can talk about swinging which is something we've been doing for years now um and then also drop some links for only fans maybe they'll get some people there and just we'll just kind of see what happens correct so um i can remember like one of the first videos that we made um you know i posted it and i put my phone in my purse because i had to go to baseball or something from with my son and like literally my phone was like blowing up we immediately i think it was either the second or third video you posted We'll be right back.
and like literally my phone was like blowing up we immediately i think it was either the second or third video you posted when what we thought was viral at the time but it got something like two 300 000 views which we thought oh my god you know we have we have made it yeah and i think it was like overnight or something you know it started pretty instantly but throughout the night you know by the next day that video had whatever a couple hundred thousand yeah because i can remember you like called and woke me up because we were on a pretty significant time difference and you called and was like look at your phone um and we thought like two or three hundred thousand views was just like major and then i don't know what video it was um we had a video hit 11 million views, which, I mean, I don't even know.
That's I mean, that's still by far our biggest video of all time. We've gotten close, but not gotten over 11 million. Yeah. And so without getting into it too much, everybody found out. They did. You freaked out. I did. We took everything down. We deleted everything. I begged you. I cried. I was like, oh, my God. Because, you know, people were calling me, messaging me, family members. You're welcome. I love you. I love down. We deleted everything. I begged you. I cried. I was like, oh, my God. Because, you know, people were calling me, messaging me, family members, I guess.
And this is where I don't think we we we had a conversation. OK, what if you will find out? We're putting this on social media. We were very private about the lifestyle prior to this. So like we had the appropriate conversation, but saying people may find out and then your family.
out prior to this so like we had the appropriate conversation but saying people may find out and then your family members calling you it you you cannot prepare for that and I don't think that me personally I understood the vast reach that TikTok had I thought maybe somebody would hear And like maybe some people would whisper i wonder she's a swinger you know i kind of thought that i never in a million years thought that like everybody in my town would know yeah but it happened very quickly what happened um so we quit we started back with no faces we went through a whole up and down of are we going to tick tock are we not going to tick tock um from my perspective through all that i kind of developed the the feeling that this is bullshit like yeah like this is who we are this is how we who we are and how we've been this way for you know at the time six years or so like this is not something i'm not ashamed of this like you know this is a very big part it's how we met it's a big part of our relationship it's something that's a part of us i'm not ashamed of it and it's it's i didn't want to let people bully me out of expressing that side of our lifestyle no i get that i guess for me i am a southern girl raised and i live in the same town that i was born and raised in.
I know all the same people. You know, I had a young child who I didn't want this to affect. I mean, like, there was a lot of things. Also, the fact that I was bisexual was being brought up. People were asking me, are you bisexual? Are you not bisexual? Well, I had been with lots of women at this point, more women than I could even count, but I had never said out loud, I'm bisexual. So like all of a sudden I've got all these people asking me all these questions and I'm like, I guess by according to paper, I'm bisexual, but I've never said those words out loud.
So now not only is everyone finding out that I'm a swinger now, you know know, my sexuality is being brought up. And it wasn't so much that I was embarrassed about our lifestyle choices because I really, I really wasn't. I was more, it hurt me more that, like, people knew that I didn't tell. Like, I didn't care that people knew I was a swinger, but I wanted to be the one to tell you. And I feel like, or I didn't care that I was bisexual. I was proud of who I was. But the fact that somebody was telling somebody and then that person was telling that, that was what was hard for me.
And it also caused a lot of tension between you and I because you don't live in the town you grew up in. You don't hang out with the people that you grew up with. So you weren't feeling the backlash that I was getting. I was having to walk to the dollar store, go into the dollar store and like hold my head up high and be proud of myself. Even on the inside, I was like, holy shit, everybody knows. Oh my God, I'm so embarrassed. You know, you are off in another country not having to deal with any of this.
And I was a home alone, kind of trying to navigate this by myself and it was just a lot it was a lot yeah so i mean it was a roller coaster of up and down and and you know eventually we came out of it as kind of united in the front as fuck it like yeah at some point it really came to the point of it it was too late like yeah correct so like you kind of left it to me because obviously i was the one getting affected by it so much so you kind of let me make call the shots as far as what we put up and what we didn't and i finally was like and it took me you know a couple weeks to come to the conclusion but at some point everybody fucking knew you know like everybody knew quickly i could not put that cat back in the bag i mean like everybody knew and so you know one of two things i could hide and be ashamed or i could say fuck everybody and just be me and so that's kind of what we did i think i finally we were posting tiktoks without our faces you could still tell it was us everybody knew i think i came to him you and was like, fuck it.
Just put our faces back. I mean, like everybody knows my face is really cute. My face is the moneymaker. Just post the shit, you know? So that's kind of how like our TikTok journey has came.
Of course, if you've, if you're a follower of ours, we get taken down offiktok all the time so we are i don't even know we could probably guess how many tiktoks we're on now who knows we probably lost it's been over 10 yeah we've probably lost close you know between 500,000 and million followers if you add it all up i don't know we should have kept up with it but we've lost multiple accounts over 100 000 some close to 200 000 so it's been quite the roller coaster it has yeah and so you know okay we start only fans that leads us to starting a tiktok how did we get into the podcasting world well i used to go live a lot um live is lot.
Going live on TikTok is a really good way to interact with people. And people would ask me the same like 10 questions over and over and over again. You know, what do you do about jealousy? What about STDs? How can you share your spouse? Where should we go to find hotel takeovers?
You know, just like the same 10 questions over and over again and i think you kind of came up with and i think people would suggest it even people on the live would suggest so you guys need to do a podcast you should make a podcast yeah and so um that was kind of your baby you started doing research and so we started to talk in like april and by september we had the podcast so um that's kind of how the podcast came and you came up with this name the sweet nation where did that come from uh i think so i mean we we kind of threw names out there and you know i don't do you remember any other i don't remember any other options i kind of wanted to name it northern guy and southern girl right yeah okay yeah and that's so my big thing was i don't want it to be and this has really been our thing i think we both kind of embraced that at this point is i don't want it to be about us right it's not the dan and lacy show yeah it's really building a community right like building you know including everybody trying being bigger than just me and you yeah um and that's kind of the swing nation you know a nation of swingers a bunch you know a community of people um you know that i thought that kind of encompassed that and obviously you kind of i think i was against it at first like normal like you can see a trend here i was kind of against the swing nation at first but eventually i just kind of let you run with it and it worked and i now i love the swing nation i think it was a great name so i guess to piggyback on that where did northern guy and southern girl come from so you hear us at the beginning of each podcast say northern guy and southern girl um so we both individually had our own sls profile and um when it was time for us to make one together you were like just do it just figure it out and so i was sitting there i was like what the hell is our name gonna be so if you're not familiar you know on those profiles everybody has something catchy that's their name and it just dawned on me northern guy and southern girl because he's from the north I'm in the south so that was our name on SLS and when we made our first TikToks I was southern girl southern swinging girl some version because again we've had so many tiktoks so many um there's just some version of southern girl and yours was always some version of northern guy so if you found us in the beginning before the podcast that is how all of our social media handles were i think even our twitter still technically is that um because we've kind of cycled everything out and a lot of it is now just northern i think i think the only reason twitter is still that is because it's the only platform that we haven't been banned on oh yeah yeah um so when we decided to do the podcast we opened it up with northern guy and southern girl so right's where that came from and even but like my only fans is still southern girl so if you follow me there that's where that came from 100 all right i think now we take a little break and we hear from the partners and sponsors of the swing nation podcast and then when we get back we're gonna go over um what swinger society is and kind of some of what has grown from from um from all this yeah all right stay tuned we'll be right back guys we here at the swing nation podcast are proud to partner with promessant listen guys we've all been there you're having a hot night with a hot chick maybe a few hot chicks but you need to kind of delay the time before you pull that trigger that's where promessant comes in they have this awesome product called the delay spray you literally spray it on and it delays the time that you orgasm so you can make sure that your partner is well taken care of.
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Make sure you join the Swing Nation SDc group and send us a message all right guys welcome back thank you for listening to our sponsors we love our sponsors we do so moving right along what the heck is swinger society so if you followed our podcast for any amount of time, you hear us talking about Swinger Society and events and stuff. And you're probably like, okay, do you own it? Where, what is your affiliation with it? So I thought this would be a good time to just kind of explain the Swinger Society. Right. Okay. So as we got into TikTok, we started meeting other TikTokers.
And really, when we got on TikTok, Swing Talk was a hashtag, but it wasn't a community. You know what I mean? There was a couple people. It was very individualized. Right. And so when me and you came onto the scene, so to speak, we started reaching out. You did. You very much unified Swing Talk.
You kind of kind of pulled people in together right i started finding anybody that was posting essentially i went out and looked on tiktok for anybody that was posting swinger related content um and i would dm them and message them and email them and be like hey you know we're you know dan and lacy we're northern guy and southern girl we're other tiktokers you know would you like to you know start a group chat with us we just want to talk about you know yeah kind of best practices or you know like kind of just talk about stuff and just to be fair like almost everybody was very open to it they were like yeah absolutely you know very it was a very good community yeah so we'd start kit groups and like share no so we started a hashtag swing talk kick group yeah we brought in five six creators uh which were probably majority of the creators at the time and really all the at least all the big creators it was bella uh vista wife snm christina kylie just some of the bigger names life of spice yeah so was kind of some of the bigger names on there.
And it was just like a really cool way for us to share, like, why do you get banned? What can you show? What can you not show? Yeah. And that's how we weren't getting banned a lot, but a lot of videos were getting taken down. And so it was like, oh, you know, you can wear a tank top, but don't wear, you know, lingerie. Or, you know, we're just kind of going over all that stuff. Yeah, because, I mean, let's be honest. We're 38 now, so we were probably like 36. Like, we're an older generation of TikTokers. So, like, we were having to learn what was okay and what was not.
So, it was really nice to, like, get information from other people. Right.
And so, because, and then we did start getting banned and things like that um banned off tiktok banned off instagram um you were getting banned on snapchat and so uh we discovered discord um and we didn't know you know this is a if you don't know discord's like a chat platform very popular in like the gaming community um but they have discords for everything now right it's definitely growing growing i see more and more discords that are not gaming related daily i think yeah but at the time there was most of it was gaming um and so what we decided is there wasn't really there didn't seem to be many rules on discord you could kind of do whatever you wanted so we're like hey if we as swing talk all funnel our followers to discord and then if we get banned essentially we can we can drop in there like hey this is our new tiktok this is our you know it's essentially a place where they can follow us and keep up with us kind of form one swing talk community but on on discord yeah because at this point we are very early in on like web like our own website so like Now we have, we everything you know um but at this point we didn't have anything so when people would when we would get banned or you know our accounts would go down people didn't know how to find us unless we just happened to come back on their fyp right so this gave us a place where we could tell everybody hey this is my new account i was banned come follow me here right okay and so so because initially what I built the the discord server it was the swing nation discord because I was building it just for us and then I kind of you know pitched this idea to the rest of the creators like hey do you guys want to join us here and we can we can funnel all of our followers to one spot we can we then we can each put out our information and that way we don't have to run like five different servers we can all be kind of together yeah uh and several of them are like yeah that's a great idea that's that's good let's do that um and so we needed a name um that wasn't the swing nation because that was just me and you it wasn't everybody um and that's where we came up with swear we actually had talked about it being like swing talk discord or something like that oh yeah but we're like we don't want to just limit it to tiktok we don't want to associate it with just tiktok we want it to be kind of its own community um and that's where swear society came from i actually think uh for our play or foreplay bellow yeah we got a bad review because you say for our play it's foreplay yes uh i think be think Bella was actually the one that suggested that name first.
And I was like, yes, that kind of sounds kind of fancy. Yeah. I was like, yeah, 100%. Let's use that one. So that's how Swinger Society was born. It was a Discord channel. I thought, or server, I thought, again, oh, my God, this man is crazy. I tried use this cord if i was so confused but the you know surprise it's super successful now have over 20 000 uh lifestyle lifestyle people in that server um it's a whole it's a whole community it's its whole thing i mean like its whole thing. I mean, like, it's insane, the community that has been built there.
And not just, we cannot take credit at this point. It's taken a life of its own. Right. And. Well, and to be complete, it's been a group effort from the start. Yeah. Because, you know, it was us and Bella and Christina and, you know, Life is Vice and a few others that joined initially. And then, now it's even grown. We have role, we have different, you know, hosts and influencers.
and uh you know life of spice and a few others that joined initially and then it now it's even grown we have role we have different you know hosts and influencers and more creators have joined us and here's kind of a whole process to kind of you know become a creator on on discord and become an influencer and it's really grown into its own community but you know in addition to the influencers we have safety patrol which are you know making sure they're keeping the community safe and people aren't know, bullying and body shaming.
We have ambassadors that are really just trying to help, you know, answer questions and point people in the right directions when they do have questions.
I mean, it's an entire, entire community of its own, you know, and to be, to my knowledge, it's the largest chat server for lifestyle people in existence in the world that I know of.'s insane which is is kind of insane if you even if you know if you go on like you know we're affiliates with sdc and sls and some of these other platforms and they do have chat rooms associated with them um and you can you know go on there on any given day there's probably like 100 or so people chatting on their platforms um you can go into the swinner society discord server on any given day, and there's usually 400 to 500 people actively engaged and chatting on that server at any time of day, which is, again, to my knowledge, the biggest group of people that you can find out there that identify as pineapple people.
That's awesome. That's kind of crazy, yeah. Yeah.
So yeah so to switch gears um swinger society is discord but it also is our events um a lot of people say they're just in it for the money which is really funny because we've only ever had two technically two events right yeah correct i mean that we've actually successfully thrown we have we have more planned for 2023 but two that we've actually done where we sold the tickets where we sold the tickets i think a lot of people get confused because we go to parties i think they assume that there are parties and there's a very big difference so um right we promote for a lot of we do different events we do so um a lot of places will reach out to us and be like can you come um sometimes they'll give us a free room sometimes they won't and i try really hard when we do our podcast on those events to give you that disclaimer um for instance last week we went to or not last week's episode we went to lifestyle connections we paid for our own room right um but the one before that was pigeon force eye candy they gave us our room for free they did um so i try really hard to be up front and honest but right but to be you know when we promote for events most of the time those events do end up you know they might comp us a room but we buy our flights or pay for our travel oh yeah for sure generally speaking on events that aren't our events we lose money so to speak because always always because we've got to travel there you know if sometimes they'll give us a free table to set up to sell merch well then we have to fly someone out to sell that merch or set up the table so it definitely is costy so like the people we view it more as a promotional for the podcast yeah yeah except losing money you know we're not in it to make money but the people that say oh my god they are just in it for money like this this part makes me laugh because i'm like you have really no idea you i would assume that too if i saw us yeah i get it okay so swinger society january of last year we all went Secrets and just a big group of us.
And we had a blast, right? We had so much fun. We didn't make it. We actually spent a ton of money. We had so much fun. And then we got home and Secrets reached out and was like, hey, we want you to come back. We want you to do that again. We want you to do it again. And this time, we want you to make a little money. And so I think at that point, we had to decide, okay, what direction are we taking this in? Right. Are we going to throw events? Are we just going to like go and kind of host things? But we like the opportunity.
We love secrets and we like the opportunity of doing a takeover there so that is how swinger society our party planner party event portion was created right so now we have officially made an llc that is swinger society we actually have a business partner in that we are planning and organizing our own events across the country at this point in time even doing some you know a know, a Hedo trip, a Bliss stuff, where we do have our own, you know, affiliate links for that stuff and have the potential to make money. We're just not there yet, guys. As of right now.
But thanks for having so much confidence in us. Yeah, as of Swingersidey LLC, I'd say we're probably pretty far in the red on that whole venture.
whole venture it's definitely a labor of love um so when we we actually do get a lot of we have a lot of wonderful feedback from y'all like so many people love us and care and love what we're doing but on the flip side of that we do get a lot of pushback we do we get you know even from other podcasters from other creators um so I think this is why it's important for us to chat about this stuff yeah we just we just want to be transparent yeah and i don't you know like it is frustrating to hear that kind of criticism but at the same time i think if you're on the outside looking in you would make some of the same assumptions that most people do make yeah i get it uh and so you know the complete transparency the whole way we're able to do any of this is because lacy's so successful on only fans that really is you know if we only did that platform and didn't do all this other stuff we would be so much more success or not more successful but we would be yeah so our bank account would look so much better our only fans has definitely it's pays for it all we now have three employees one through swinger society and two through just you and i personally the podcast yeah um and my i mean well now swinger society pays for one employee but the two for us my only fans 100 percent pays for that and we kind of in in the situation you got to spend money to make money and it's so far it's worked out for us well i think you know if we're being completely transparent about all this is we don't want to just be only fans creators right no so my goal was would be to eventually be able to drop only fans i mean not that we don't enjoy it i mean i mean okay i'll take that back i would like to continue to have one but it'd be at on my it is on my terms now but i know that we have that we have to be a reliable correct correct yeah i'd like to just make like cutesy pictures and little videos i think that would be ideal because i feel like in a lot of ways having the only fan takes away from our credibility from our podcast and stuff like that even though it absolutely shouldn't it should not matter but i don't like the fact that people can hang that over my head like people well you're only on tiktok because you have an only fans and you need people to go to your only fans you only have a podcast for so i would like to remove that piece but it is also very very hard we are making very good money yeah on it well i have mixed feelings so i agree with what you're saying is i think if we didn't have the only fans you know it would Thank you.
also very very hard we are making very good money yeah on it well i have mixed feelings so i agree with what you're saying is i think if we didn't have the only fans you know it would people wouldn't be able to use that against us and say oh you're just doing this for to make money there right but on the flip side i genuinely support creators on that platform oh 100 and think maybe what we need to do is just end that stupid stigma and not necessarily quit the platform you I mean? So I'm very torn on how I feel about that. No, I agree with what you're saying. You're completely correct. Right.
It's really they're wrong for making that assumption. It's not – we're not wrong for having that platform. Yeah. It's just me dealing – I think like as a female, like in the Bible Belt, as a mother, I think there's a lot of shame. it's society yeah making you feel you know you've been raised to think yeah i agree and so um and then you know like we get the comments oh do you only have sex if it's recorded you know do y'all only like have sex with each other at swingerman stuff? Stuff like that. Like, I hate that. Like, absolutely hate all of that, those comments.
And then also, I think people treat me less than they should. They like, because I have an OnlyFans. Like, because even like on Snapchat, people will message me. Or even on TikTok Live, and they're like, how many people do you sleep with at the last Swingerman?
Well, that's, one, none of your fucking business and two like that's i you're not allowed to speak to me that way and they're like well you have an only fans or you're a swinger or whatever that doesn't give you the right to talk to me that way yeah again i think you know my perspective on it is instead of changing what we're doing you know i'd rather change the perspective of what we're doing Agreed. Yeah. Okay. All right. So. That's who we are.
That's all of our information so there's something that we didn't cover about us um there's a lot we didn't cover but well it was supposed to be just more of like a quick one hour long review a recap yeah get you up to speed yeah so you don't have to go back and listen to all the ones even though there's some really good ones in there there was all right so if you had to look you know on our show notes it says back at 2022 but i think really if you had to look at our lifestyle journey and really more so in the since we've gone public um what are the highlights for you i've like 2022 or just everything since we start since you posted the first tiktok oh gosh Let's get started.
one of the highlights for you i've like 2022 or just everything since we start since you posted the first tiktok oh gosh um or posted the first only things hito is up there um if you've never been to hito you should go with it to me because we're going but it's hito is like in my opinion like the super bowl of swinging um hito is up there what about you well okay so i think it's twofold for me right so i could look back at you know oh so i'm just being selfish no no you're about to say something inspirational and i'm over here like going to jamaica is my top thing no i think there's a few so i think you know i can look back at secrets when me and you were on stage and you know really through our first you know event and you know had a sold out event and you know you know looking out of the crowd and have kind of seeing our community you know because i think you know we do tiktok lives and we have 50 000 people on it and that's that's one thing but when you when you have three or four hundred people come out to an event um it really you know it makes it more real i think We'll be right back.
do tiktok lives and we have 50 000 people on it and that's that's one thing but when you when you have three or four hundred people come out to an event um it really you know it makes it more real i think um so there definitely are some highlights especially especially our our one-year podcast bash at secrets there's been a couple of private moments that you and i've had we're not private they're very public but we kind of whispered in the other two years like wow i can't believe we did this or i can't believe we're here yeah um one two i'd say the other thing that really stands out for me in the last you know since we've started this um is the times that we've connected with couples that are new so you know i'd look at like jersey couple i'd look at like j and j you know charlotte charlotte couple um and really like my answer sucked by the way i'm saying connected with them and and you know even all these messages we get in emails and on social media where people are like thank you so much for your podcast and your platform because of you you know we're going to try this and you know especially with like jersey couple you know like they're like we're so thankful for you that you were able to kind of grab our hand and walk us through this and then you know from kind of their first event all the way through their first full swap um you know i think when you see how it affects couples and how it affects their relationship and you see how i mean i truly believe the lifestyle can transform people right and kind of can kind of give people the opportunity to be themselves and in a situation in a place where they don't have to you know feel ashamed for things um when you have those moments it's i think it's a powerful thing and we've had i couldn't count how many of those over the last uh 18 months or so yeah i mean i just want to go back to jamaica we're going babe i'm just joking no i'm just joking no those are all like wonderful i totally agree there's been so many moments where we've like paused and just looked at each other like oh my god also my own personal growth i think i've grown it's like in my self-confidence and you know breaking all the barriers that i was raised with owning who I am um a lot of those I've seen tremendous growth of myself no I agree you know me witnessing you yeah you know you think a year and a half ago you were you didn't want to be naked you know places um you were afraid to speak up when people would you know be pushy with you you know you've really found your voice and found your confidence and I think that's you know that's it's an amazing thing to see you know went from a year and a half ago you you wouldn't even say you were bisexual or you know had some issues about being public and being a swinger now you'll put a swinger society shirt on and walk through walmart with an upside down pineapple in your cart oh yeah and like when people look at you weird you just smile and say like how are you having a great day you know i mean like yeah and i think that's really the transformation that you know well i think i didn't mean to interrupt you i'm sorry but like it's one thing to say i'm a swinger and i'm proud it's another to walk through walmart in your hometown with a swinger society shirt on and be like fuck you bitches you know i think like we were saying all the right things on tiktok you know like we came out you know we were saying what we were supposed to say but i think we've kind of had to learn how to live what we say does that make sense and it's it's definitely been a journey it changes all the time you know like some days i might not be feel confident and then the next next day I'm like, look at me, I'm hot, I'm swinger, and I make a ton of money on OnlyFans.
So fuck all y'all, you know, so it just kind of depends, you know, it depends on the day of the week. But I think if anything, I've learned a lot about myself. And I'm grateful to have a partner who has encouraged all of that and, and all your crazy visions. I give you shit all the time. Like I never thought that we would be TikTok successful. I never thought any of this would ever work out and you pretty much nailed every single thing. So I'm super grateful for that. Yeah. And I truly think, you know, like I want other people to experience it. You know what I mean?
Like I'm not trying to push. I don't think everybody should be a a swinger i know it's not for certain people and that's perfectly fine but i almost feel like we've like learned this trick or like you know i mean have found this thing and it's like yeah it's like man if people only knew if people only you know like if people only knew you could tell your partner what your fantasies are and then go out and do them and then come back and laugh and joke and and reconnect and like it all be OK. And you don't have to get divorced and hate each other and be jealous.
Like, you know, I mean, like to me, that's a very self-rewarding thing. It's very it's very positive in our relationship. It's very positive for our mental health. I mean, it's positive in so many ways. And the fact that people act like it's some terrible act and it should be shunned from society, you know, it just makes me want to push back against it that much more. Yeah. No, I totally agree. All right. Thank you.
it's some terrible act and it should be shunned from society you know it just makes me want to push back against it that much more yeah no i totally agree all right so what does 2023 have in store for us babe well we have a new studio if you don't know if you're if you're listening to us we have a recorded version i'm sure dan will put it somewhere a video but we created a brand new studio it's not quite done right it's it's better than the uh table in the rv yes correct um so um the podcast is super successful so we just want to make it even more successful in 2023 we're still competing with front porch swingers but yeah you know we're ahead of them um more days than we used to be so that's they're a stiff competition we love you guys yes absolutely um we have so many events planned um swinger society is is happening we're going full force ahead uh we have an event in nashville like we said we're doing hito we're basically have a national level event that we're participating in monthly ish minus like two months yeah there's a couple months we don't have anything for 2023 but we really tried to fill our calendar and our goal was to get our calendar out to everyone before the end of the year so that way you could look at it and say okay i can go to this one or these two or hell i'm gonna go to them all you know 2022 we were just trying to figure what the hell we were doing so we were just throwing events up or going to places or you know kind of as they came a lot of it was less than a month out yeah so this year we tried really really hard to be able to get that all out so everyone can we really have we have the next six months for you.
Yes. Like I said, Hedo, a Bliss Cruise, Nashville. Secrets. We have two secrets. One in March, one later in the year that hasn't been announced yet. We have Splash, Naughty in New Orleans. And much more. Much, much more.
It's gonna be a crazy year yeah um we're doing this now full time yeah both of us yeah so uh you know um we're looking into other platforms yeah streaming on platforms like twitch platforms like instagram and facebook i'm gonna do a lot more going live universally across all those platforms at the same time um a lot a lot of i think we're going to try to standardize our routine a little bit more where you can know when to expect to see us um streaming and on what platforms and kind of get that information out to you guys ahead of time and have a more of a routine for you guys uh so i think we're gonna start taking this little since it kind of is both of our full-time jobs we've taken a lot more seriously and really really investing in all this and this is kind of what the studio and stuff's about so yeah so there's a podcast that you want us to do we're all ears um the swing nation at gmail is our e our email address please send um any suggestions over we try to pull from what's currently going on in our lives to make Thank you.
our email address please send um any suggestions over we try to pull from what's currently going on in our lives to make episodes that we feel like people really want but we're always open to suggestions yeah well we like interviewing people especially if you're like an expert if you're you know a medical professional or a club owner or an event coordinator or you know you name it if you're somehow involved in the lifestyle in some way or fashion and have a story to tell reach out to us we'd be happy to promote that on our platform yep that's pretty much it that's it what else babe i think that's all i think that is it so everybody has a happy new year yeah and not you know i think the way to end this is really to say we appreciate you know this, this last year and a half.
I think we feel very blessed. You know, we wouldn't be in this situation without everybody out there that's listening and watching and following us repeatedly every time we get banned and coming back and everybody on Discord who is just doing amazing work for the community, you know, the different advocacy groups out there in CSF, Woodhull, the people that are out there fighting for the community. We appreciate all you guys. We're going to try to tie all that together and kind of keep you guys in the loop as much as we can for all things swinger and non-monogamy. So stay tuned.
We're going to get a lot more of that coming. Yep. All right. I think with that, in a world full of apples. Be the pineapple. Be the pineapple, guys. Bye. Bye. If you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us, leave a five-star review wherever you're listening. If you want to see more of our content, you can find links to Snapchat, Twitter, Instagram, OnlyFans, and more in the show notes. Come join the conversation with us and other Swinger content creators on our Swinger Society Discord server. If you have questions or feedback, email them to us at theswingnation at gmail.com.
Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up to date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.
