Send us Fan MailThe Swing Nation PodcastLifestyle Interview: Overcoming Low Libido with Dr. Angela Stoehr | Episode 84In this swinger podcast episode, Dan and Lacy take a deep dive with Dr. Angela Stoehr into the root causes of low libido in women and some simple treatment options that you probably don t know exist! We talk about this complex sexual instinct and how it varies from person to person, and what you can do to get your groove back. While it s common to have a dip in your sex drive, there are things you can do about it! Tune in to get the low down on libido in this episode of The Swing Nation Podcast! - Please Nominate us for the ASN Awards in the following categories:BEST CONTENT CREATORLACY - SWING NATIONBEST EDUCATORLACY - SWING NATIONBEST SUPPORTING BUSINESSSWING NATIONBEST ENTERTAINMENT PODCASTSWING NATIONBEST SOCIAL MEDIA INFLUENCERLACY - SWING NATIONBEST EDUCATOR WEBSITELACY - SWING NATIONASN Awards_______________- The Swing Nation - Main Website Quick Navigation Website: -- (Find all our social media links more!) Follow us on Facebook! The Podcast Website_______________ - Swinger Society - Our Website to meet, connect events Swinger Society Discord Our Facebook Group_______________ - Swinger Websites - SDCUsername: TheSwingNation** Use code 36313 for 14 days free! ** SLSUsername: NorthernGuynSouthernGirl_______________ - Merch More - The Swing Nation Merch The Swinger Pride Flags Swinger Society Merch_______________ - Lacy’s Fun Links - VIP OnlyFans PREMIUM OnlyFans _______________ -- THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS -- Shameless Care: ED Medication and at home STD testingUse Code TSN at checkout for $30 off your order! Promescent® Make Love Longer, It’s Time for Great SexSupport the show- Thank you for the support! -
Transcript
This podcast is intended for adult audiences. Over the age of 18, it contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us, and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice. Welcome to the Swing Nation podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers, where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle.
Come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe, interview the experts, learn and grow together. Join the nation. Lacey, we get approached by couples all the time and they want to know, like, where can they learn the one-on-ones of non-monogamy? Yeah, I totally get it. You want to get in the lifestyle, but you just don't know where to start.
We recommend Sex by Sue's class on non-monogamy yeah i totally get it you want to get in the lifestyle but you just don't know where to start we recommend sex by sue's class on non-monogamy she really helps couples learn how to communicate and do the lifestyle the correct way yeah i think this lifestyle you know it's crucial not to to step on the landmines that a lot of us do yeah and you kind of learn the hard way you know so having a class can take online, you know, in the privacy of your own home and kind of learn the ins and outs, learn, you know, how to approach the lifestyle, how to communicate with your partner about it.
You know, I think it's something worth taking and we highly recommend it. Yeah. So click below in the show notes. You'll find this link for that course. Check it out, guys. Bye. Most people have unprotected oral sex, right? Be honest. Now think about your last STD test. Did your doctor tickle your throat with something that looked like a giant Q-tip? Probably not. Yet that's the only way to check for oral gonorrhea or chlamydia, which are often asymptomatic. You need a better doctor. You need shamelesscare.com. Use coupon code TSN at checkout.
So Lacey, people are asking, how do they get to go to a party or an event with us? They check out swingersociety.net. You create a profile, you sign up for an event, and you come hang out with us. Super easy.
That that's right if you want to party with us and the other faces and names that you know from social media and tiktok head on over to swingersociety.net can't wait to see you there hey there pineapple people and welcome to the swing nation podcast we are your host northern guy and southern girl and today uh dr store is back to talk to us again this is her third appearance if i'm counting right really i feel like it was more than that yeah it's only i think it's her third right is that that's right right yeah i think that's right yeah i think we talked aboutirting, and then we talked about pregnancy prevention, and now we're here today to talk about female libido.
Yeah. This is a question. Oh, you know what? It's number four. Yeah, we did an STD. We talked about sex and transmitted infections. Yeah, we did. Man. That's a good one. You can't forget that one. Yeah, that was a good one. Yeah. All right. So our fourth episode with Dr. Storr. You're becoming a staple here on the Swing Nation podcast. I like it. Yes, we're here to talk about libido. Yeah. Specifically female libido, since that's kind of your area of expertise.
Lacey gets asked all the time, you know, she's on TikTok and different social media platforms about, like, you know, like, I'd love to be a swinger. You know, this is women that are asking these questions. They say, well, all that swinging sounds fun, but I barely, like, have enough sex drive to have sex with my husband. Like, how do you find the energy or time to want to have sex with other people? Yeah. Are you asking me that question? Are you asking Dr. Stover that question? What do you normally say when people ask you? I don't know. And not always do I want that.
I mean, like, sometimes I'm like super into it. And other times I need to like a little encouragement and I'm into it. And other times I'm like, no, I'm good. So I mean, it kind of varies. Yeah, if it's after like 11pm, she's usually not super into it. But no, I mean, I think I have a high sex drive, I guess. I mean, I don't know the answer to that, I guess. But I genuinely love you and I'm genuinely into you. And so I think that also helps as well. Okay. So I guess the question for the doctor is, is there a normal, like, how many times does the average couple have sex?
And is there a normal, what's the baseline for this libido question? Okay. So there's actually two very different questions in there. What is normal and what is the average amount of times that people have intercourse? Okay. So what's normal actually varies from person to person. There are some people that are normally asexual. They do not want to have sex at all. Never have, never will, don't want to. And there's not something that you can treat there. That's considered a variant of normal. And everybody's natural sex drive varies.
Some people are like hypersexual and want to have sex once or twice a day. Some people are less hypersexual and they're kind of like once or twice a week. And there's some people that are like, you know what? I could have it once a month and I love it when I have it, but that's all I really need. So normal actually is a huge variation, like huge variation. Now, how often is the average? So the average married couple in the United States has sex once to twice per week. So that's a pretty recent statistics. Not too bad. No, not at all. And that's a pretty average couple.
Now that doesn't include couples that are currently undergoing therapy because they're fighting, people who are in process of divorce, but currently married, people who are newly married. It kind of rules most of those out when you're looking at the statistics. So people that are like average, middle, after, I think it's four years of marriage is when they start like asking the question up until like age 58 or something like that the last time I looked at the stats. So about once to twice per week is considered average. So average and normal are two very different things. Okay.
OK, so I guess then is how do we determine, you know, if I'm a female listening to this and I'm like, OK, I only like having sex once a month and maybe my husband likes it once or twice a week like you're saying and they're wondering themselves, well, do I have a low libido or is that okay for me? I guess how do you determine that somebody has a low libido as opposed to that's just normal for them? Okay. So the definition of low libido is actually a little nebulous.
And I know that sounds sort of weird, but the way we decide for something like hypoactive sexual desire disorder or low libido would be if it causes marked interpersonal distress, which basically means if it is causing issues in your marriage and it bothers either you, your partner, or both of you, then it is considered low, low libido or abnormal. Now, usually the way I start digging into it is I ask my patient, when was the time that you had the most libido in your adulthood?
Because, I mean, your teenage years don't necessarily exactly count because most of us are pretty energetic sexually when we're experimenting as young people. But yeah, like when you were like in your early mid twenties or when you were newly or married, you know, were you a little bit more, Hey, you know, receptive to sex. Were you a little bit more engaging? Were you wanting to have sex three, four times a week? That's probably what your baseline is. And if you're less than that, then it is considered abnormal for you.
Um, and again, it has a lot more to do with the interpersonal relationships that it may be affecting that it actually has for the person themselves. Like if both partners were totally okay with once a month, we wouldn't need to do anything. We wouldn't call that low libido, but if one partner's once a month and the other partner's twice a week, you can see where the problem may happen there. Right. So yeah, it really seems like the, whether or not it's medically diagnosed as low libido depends on the relationship, not necessarily the person. Okay. Or the individual person themselves.
Like if they're like, Hey, because I have a lot of single women in my practice as well. And they're like, Hey, you know what? I used to want to use my toys like three or four times a week. And now I'm kind of like, eh, like, well, let's dig into it. If that's bothering you, that's something to do. Okay. Yeah. So it could be an individual. If there's a marked change, I guess would be the, yeah. Marked interpersonal. Yeah. Mark, marked distress is what they call it. Okay.
So if, if somebody is listening to us and they're like, Oh, actually when I was maybe a little younger or maybe when I first got married, yeah, we were having sex multiple times a week and now I'm only, you know, comfortable doing it or only want desire it once a month. My partner wants it still to be at that multiple times a week. Um, what, what are some of the possible reasons that they might have experienced this change or this shift? Okay. So how I counsel my patients for this is actually maybe a little bit on the funny side, but it gets the point across.
Men or penis owners in general, they need a naked person and the ability to have an erection. That's it. That's all they need, and they're good to go. Most males with those two things can have sex and will have the desire. Now, there is a little bit more nuance to that. You have to have the right testosterone levels. You need to have the right blood flow. You need to not be on blood pressure medication. So there's more nuance than that. But it's kind of, you know, men are sort of a microwave and women sort of aren't.
Women have to have a lot of things going right in order to feel the desire to have sex. One of them, they need to be comfortable in their situation. It's comfortable in their interpersonal situation. So if there's a history of any type of abuse, sexual abuse, any type of verbal abuse, physical abuse by their current partner, that will affect their libido. If there's a history of childhood sexual abuse, that will affect libido. If you're taking antidepressants, that's one of the things that Lacey brought up.
That's definitely a thing as well, taking antidepressants, certain types of medications other than antidepressants. I typically say you have to have your hormones in the right balance with each other. They don't just need to be certain levels, but they need to be in balance. So if your estrogen is really high and your progesterone is really low, that screws over your libido. If you don't have enough testosterone floating around as a female, that really screws up your libido. The kids need to be at sleep. You don't need to have any dishes in the sink.
You need to find your spouse attractive and, at least alluring whether or not they're actually physically attractive to you, but emotionally attractive somehow. There's this whole like huge chunk of things that need to happen correctly for women to have the desire. Um, and a lot of it winds up being psychological and females, you know, yes, we need to be able to lubricate our vaginas and we need to get blood flow to the clitoris. But we also need to feel safe. We need to feel loved. We need to feel wanted and desired.
And then on top of that, our hormones have to be right and there has to be little to no distraction. So lots of things that can go wrong in females. Yeah. And so I know you specialize in like sexual pain issues. Is that something that affects women? And that's, you know, I guess some people might not even realize, I don't know if you, you know, if it hurts when you're having sex, there's probably an issue other than just your libido there, right? Yes, correct. That's actually one of the big things that I usually discuss with my patients is you have to be able to have painless sex.
Um, when you have painful sex, that obviously makes you not desire it. Um, it's pretty logical, but I mean, like you wouldn't hit your thumb over and over with a hammer, right? Even if you thought that you might get a thousand dollars, you're like, yeah, I'll hit it once, but that's enough. Um, I joke around with my patients that if you've ever known a child who was bit by a dog and they don't like to play with dogs anymore, if your vagina has been bit by a penis, it doesn't want to play with one of those either. Yeah.
And another thing, you talked about a lot of the mental aspects of it and stuff. It seems like there's a lot of good diet and exercise is the cure to so many things. It's like if you start feeling bad about yourself or about your body, that really feeling sexy and wanting to have sex is maybe the furthest thing from your mind.
Um, so I think, you know, from my perspective, it seems like people are quick to like, want to find a magic pill to fix these things or like, give me a drug that'll make me feel better and make me want to do all these things when a lot of it is, you know, putting in the hard work to kind of work on your personal health to get to a place where, where you feel. Yeah. I will tell you when women, um, working towards the personal health part gets actually really complicated when your hormones you feel. Yeah.
I will tell you when women, um, working towards the personal health part gets actually really complicated when your hormones are out of whack. Cause when you don't have enough testosterone floating around, you lack what I like to call that's the desire to get up and go. Um, women in their late thirties to like mid forties, when they start going through perimenopausal changes, start dropping their testosterone levels. And then they all of a sudden lack desire to do anything, not just to have sex. like you're like I know and it's not a Thank you.
start going through perimenopausal changes, start dropping their testosterone levels. And then they all of a sudden lack desire to do anything, not just to have sex. Like you're like, I know. And it's not a depression type thing, but it's like, you know what? I know I need to go to the grocery store. I just don't want to. And like the desire to get up and go do things that you used to have starts lacking. So it's not just a matter of, hey, I don't want to go to the gym. They don't want to do anything.
So getting the hormones corrected actually helps with the chutzpah to get up and go to the gym and work on themselves personally as well. And I will say it's actually a lot more in males that they feel like they need to look a certain way or feel a certain way to be sexually attractive than in females. Women are much more likely to say, hey, if you would just do the damn dishes, I would have sex. Yeah. So they don't have to feel – I mean, yes, they want to feel comfortable in themselves and they want to feel beautiful, but that's not as important in females as it is in males.
That's really surprising, but it makes so much sense to me. Yeah. Well, it makes sense to me too because, like you're saying, there are lots of males out there looking to have sex with women. And a lot of them aren't super picky about necessarily you don't have to be a supermodel or, you know. Yeah. Well, we talk about that in a lot, though. If women desire sex, they can probably go out and find somebody that wants to have sex with them. But what you're saying is, you know, so it's not necessarily how attractive they feel.
It's whether or not, you know, they feel comfortable or feel, you know know, safe. If they feel safe. Yeah. Yeah. Safety is a big thing for females. If you don't feel safe in a certain situation, you're very unlikely to be able to, um, to be able to get going. You won't, you'll lack the, the sexual like crescendo if you don't feel safe. Okay. And, you know, and I want to hold off a little bit to talk about specifically about treatment options, but if treatment options. But if somebody is listening to this and they're like, okay, I relate to what Dr. Storer is saying.
I used to be more sexually active. I'm less sexually active now. It is creating issues with my partner. I guess what are the next, what are the options for them? What are some steps? What should they do to start with before we get into specific treatments, they just go talk to their doctor about that. They get their hormones checked. Like what, what do you do? A little bit of everything. So yeah, the first thing I would suggest is talking to your partner. If your partner is unaware that you're having drive issues, then they're probably going to be thinking, Hey, it's me.
Something's wrong with me. I'm not good enough, especially males. No offense, fragile egos. If the woman's not feeling like having sex with them, a lot of males are like, oh, well, obviously it's me. I've gained weight. Or I haven't gone to the gym as often. Or maybe my breath is bad. The guys get very into themselves about there's something wrong with me. When a lot of times for women, it's not necessarily that there's anything wrong with the partner. A lot of times what's wrong is their own natural balance.
And so a lot of times the communication just like, Hey, babe, it's not because I don't love you. It's not because I don't find you attractive. There's something going on with me. And I just like, I'm lacking the natural drive and having that communication is super important. Um, so I would definitely talk to the partner first. There's also a lot of, um, you guys are probably pretty good about this and a lot of swingers are, but there's a lack of communication a lot of times between partners about what is desired.
So for instance, um, if the male is wanting to have sex three times a week, but he's naturally submissive and the woman is only wanting to have sex once a month because she wants to be the submissive, you can see there's a problem there. You know, like if he would just get a little rough with her, she would want it more often. And so sometimes there's the communication as well between, Hey, you know, I, I would like more oral or I would like you to spank me or, Hey, why don't you blindfold me? Why don't we do something that's not, you know, lights off, eyes shut missionary position?
Sometimes it's a lack of being creative in the bedroom that's causing some of the problem. Now, again, swingers don't necessarily have quite the problem with that, because a lot of us are very vocal about what we want, but it can happen pretty much in any situation.
Even in a very healthy swinger set marriage, you can have people who just don't communicate well with each other about what they want yeah it's you know you talk about that we just were on the uh the horny housewife podcast um and that's basically her whole podcast is about um you know dealing with sex in in a long-term marriage and she talks a lot about being intentional with it and you know like making time and like planning and you know put on some lingerie and like plan to fuck your partner and make it fun and interesting because i think there is a lot to be said you know kind of what you're i think alluding to is you know if you're married to somebody for 10 20 30 years sex can kind of you know be one of those things that kind of gets put aside and you kind of forget you not forget about it but like you just don't put in the effort or energy into it.
Yeah. We said it at the same time. Yeah. Putting in the effort is, is really big. And a lot of that, again, if, if you're finding a lack of desire, it could be because you're getting bored, you know, with women, we, we want things interesting too. And if it's always been lights off missionary position and we're like, Hey, you know, I, I'd like to maybe try something different. If your husband or your partner is good with that, then you may find, Oh, Hey, then now I'm going again, because we got excited about the idea of doing something new.
So yeah, communication is the first thing that I would really dig into. If you guys communicate and everything's going really well and you're like, Hey, you know, we've, we've tried a couple of different things. And still, when he smacks me on the high knee dude, it just makes my skin crawl. And see, you notice your wife's nodding her head because she's felt that way before. Yeah, I have. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know if people are just listening to this or they can see us too, but they can. She was nodding her head, everybody.
So most women at some point can relate to be that kind of like, Oh God, it just touched me. I don't want to do that right now. And a lot of times that's not something that you can overcome with just a little bit of communication. And it could be that if you guys just had a fight, yeah. And he's trying to smack you on the high and you're like, Oh fuck off. Um, but you know, like it's, it's because you're mad, but if it's really just because like your hormones are in the right position, yeah, that's, it's going to make your skin crawl and that will make you undesiring of having sex.
And one of the bigger problems with that is over time, if you continue to decline, he will stop instigating because again, no offense, males, fragile ego. When they instigate a couple of times and you say no, a couple of times, they're not going to ask again because they don't want to get their feelings hurt. Yeah, no, I agree with that. Yeah. So I guess if, if that's the feeling you get and your skin is crawling, that's, it seems to me like that's what you're saying is there's, that's a sign that there's an issue somewhere.
Most somewhere most likely yeah um i would say if pretty much every time he instigates or even like the idea of him instigating and the reason i say that is um i had a patient once who every time her husband would send her flowers at work she'd start getting just grouchy and like irritated and she's like i just don't want to he's like i know what he's doing i what he's doing. And I was like, Hey, look, he is trying. God bless him. But like, she would know that that was the beginning of instigation for him. And when she, you know, her hormones were completely out of whack.
She had like zero testosterone floating around. And once we fixed it, she'd send him flowers and she was like, Ooh, Ooh, look what he's getting into tonight. So it's, if you have that sensation of like, just, it literally is skin crawling when your spouse or your loved one is instigating. Yeah. There's probably something more to it than just, Hey, things aren't going well in the relationship. Right. Okay. So at that point is the time to go have a conversation with your doctor is what I'm hearing. Absolutely. Okay. Yeah.
I would definitely say if you're there or if there's interpersonal difficulty and you guys have chatted it out and you're, you don't really get the skin crawling, but you're still like, hey, he wants it four times a week and I'm just not into it. And we can't, you can't figure out between the two of you maybe what might help with that. Yeah. Go to your doctor for sure. Okay. And then this is, this is the next, it's interesting to me. And we had a little bit of a conversation about this, you know, prior to recording.
But if I go to my doctor and I say, oh, when I go to have sex with my partner, I have a hard time getting an erection. He's going to be like, no problem, Dan, I got you. Here's some pills. It's going to fix it. Everything's going to be great. And that's that's kind of the solution. If Lacey goes to her doctor and says, hey, when my husband tries to be intimate with me, I don't necessarily feel it.
What you know, it seems like the common response to that is like oh well you're getting older that's normal or like oh try going to the gym more you know or some kind of answer like that is that what you've experienced oh yeah that's typically what I get in fact I get patients all the time that come into my office and they're like well you know I saw my primary saw my primary care doc and we talked about it. And they said, well, there really isn't very much to do about this. It's just a normal part of aging. I'm like, oh my gosh, seriously.
If a male were to walk into a urologist's office and say, hey, I, you know, I'm having a hard time getting an erection. The urologist wouldn't just look at them and say, hey, that's a normal part of aging. Sorry. Yeah. I mean, like that's ridiculous. Of course they wouldn't do that. But is difficulty getting an erection at 50 a normal part of aging? Absolutely. The thing is, it's become acceptable for males to be treated, but it's not yet acceptable for females to be treated. And for me, that's just asinine, but it is what it is.
So what I typically tell my patients, I'm like, look, if you come into my office telling me that you are having trouble having sex, you're having trouble getting aroused, my response should not be, hey, it's a normal part of aging. Is it? Yes. Is it treatable? Absolutely. There are things that we can do for this now. And there's lots of different options for treatment, but for sure getting into like, you know, talking to your doctor, checking your hormones, that sort of thing, and also learning with intermediary how to communicate with each other sometimes can be super helpful as well.
I would never tell a patient coming in saying, hey, I'm having trouble with libido, and just tell them, oh, that's a normal part of aging. You're 45. Sorry. I guess the follow-up question that is, okay, so if somebody goes to the doctor and that's the answer they get, what can they do about it? Or how should they address that with their doctor? What should be their follow-up to that? Yeah. Get a new doctor. God bless. Well, honestly, usually when a doctor says something like that, it's because they don't know what to do about it. Doctors really, really hate feeling like they're inadequate.
Think of us all like, you know, high school teenage boys, like everything we do must be perfect. But we are also kind of expected to be perfect by the population and we're put up on pedestals. And so when somebody comes in with something that we don't know how to treat, we tend to deflect or we'll put the blame on them, you know, like, oh, well, you're just getting older. It's your fault. You're doing something wrong instead of saying, hey, there's something that I can do about this. It's not necessarily because they're a bad doctor.
It's probably just because they don't know how to treat that particular thing. And so if they say, hey, you know, this is a normal part of aging, my response to that as a patient would be, okay, I understand it's a normal part of aging. If you're not sure what can be done about it, do you know somebody that can treat me? Do you know that anyone that knows more about this? And a lot of them will be like, well, yeah, I'm sure there's probably some type of a sex med group in the area. Sex med specialists are actually a lot more common than sexual pain specialists.
So if you're having problems with libido or what have you asking to see if there's a sexual medicine group in your area or somewhere close by is probably your next best bet okay so you're really looking for that referral to a specialist from your your primary care if they don't know how to treat you and it seems to me like it's pretty common that that's going to be the case for most primary care doctors, that they don't specialize in it. Yeah, they're probably not going to be sure what to do about it.
There are a lot of different primary care specialists now that are dabbling in stuff like hormones. And so sometimes they'll throw you on hormones without necessarily doing the appropriate workout for that, which makes me nervous as a gynecologist. But yeah, there's definitely specialists kind of all over the area. And if your primary care doesn't know who to refer you to, you can start Googling around and look for a sexual specialist in your area. A lot of them will take patients without referral. Without referral? Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Unfortunately, sexual medicine for women is very rarely, if ever covered by insurance. So you're going to be out of pocket to pay for it. But if you get somebody who knows what they're doing, it's worth it. So is this a thing that you keep saying primary care? Is this something you go to like your normal family doctor or you go to your OBGYN? You're probably going to get less pushback at an OBGYN, but not necessarily. A lot of OBGYNs also are not super familiar with sexual medicine. I know that sounds absolutely crazy.
A lot of what our training was in residency is how to deliver babies and how to take care of abnormal uterine bleeding. I mean, like those are the biggies. If you, if you could do a hysterectomy and you can deliver a baby, you can graduate. And granted, that's a little basic, but not a lot of education about sexual functioning.
You know, like we know the sexual cycle, your regular gynecologist will understand, you know, that there's clitoral stimulation needs to be involved in the type of blood flow and the anatomy, but they're not necessarily going to be aware of what does and does not affect your libido unless they're a sex med specialist. Okay, good to know. But that also gives you two options too.
Like if you go to your regular family doctor and you don't get the answer you want you tried your ob-gyn maybe you'll get a little bit better answer or if not then you take the other route i don't know if not yep then a sex med doc yeah just what i would say is if you go to your doctor and say hey i think something's wrong with my libido and their answer is anything other than hey hey, I know what to do with that or I know who to send you to, then you need to look it up yourself because there are treatments for this and there are people who know what to do with libido even in really complicated situations.
Okay. Good to know. Okay. So I think at this point, we take a little break and hear from the partners and sponsors of the Swing Nation podcast. And then when we get back, I want to get into some of what the options are out there and if we could kind of touch on that and educate people so they kind of know what to look for if they're having these kind of issues. Okay. All right. We'll be right back, guys. We here at the Swing Nation podcast are proud to partner with ProMessage. Listen, guys.
guys we've all been there you're having a hot night with a hot chick maybe a few hot chicks but you need to kind of delay the time before you pull that trigger that's where promessant comes in they have this awesome product called the delay spray you literally spray it on and it delays the time that you orgasm so you can make sure that your partner is well taken care of and as swingers we're all about making sure our partners are well taken care of and promescent delay spray is the perfect product for that click the link in the show notes below to get yours today anxiety can cause ed like the kind you get while watching your partner with someone else.
You're having the time of your life, yet are having stage fright. Most men in the lifestyle use prescription ED medication for this reason. Shameless Care should be your provider. Shameless is less expensive than other companies and has a 50-state network of physicians who are lifestyle-friendly. Use coupon code TSN for $30 off. ShamelessCare.com. The Swing Nation podcast is proud to announce an official partnership with SDC.com. SDC stands for Seek, Discover, Connect.
And with over 3 million members in over 50 countries, it's the world's largest lifestyle community and a great place to link up with open-minded couples, singles, and kinksters from around the globe. Whether you're just starting your lifestyle journey or you're an old pro, SDC has something to offer you. With chat rooms, live cams, groups, and blogs, there's always naughty fun to be found. SDC.com also has expert advice, professional articles, and entertaining content to enhance your erotic lifestyle journey.
With information about parties, events, clubs, and businesses, SDC is so much more than just a hookup site for swingers. It's truly an epicenter that can keep you plugged into the pulse of the lifestyle community in your area. We personally love the website's ease of use and amazing customer support. They have supported us in our podcast and giving generous donations to our charity fundraising efforts. So if you're looking to connect with like-minded people, click the link in our show notes and sign up for STC using our affiliate link and receive full access for 14 days completely free.
Make sure you join the Swing Nation stc group and send us a message all right guys welcome back we're still here with dr store talking all things libido all right so there you're saying there are options right so they go to the doctor you know the doctor says you're just getting old um you know uh good luck with that you're saying insist on going either you know educating your doctor on some of the options or go to a specialist um what once they get to a specialist what are the kind of things that the specialist is going to be doing or looking for or what are some of the treatment options that exist out there so the first thing any good sex med doc is going to do is get a really thorough history.
So I fairly recently had a patient that I was kind of digging through and I just had a feeling something else was going on. And eventually I asked her, I was like, is there any history of sexual abuse in your childhood? And she's like, yeah, how did you know? And I was like, was it under the age of 13? She's like, oh my gosh, yes, it was. I was like, this is what's affecting your natural drive. Because she always had a low libido from the time she very first started having sex, even as a teenager, she had a low libido. And it's because she was sexually abused as a child.
And so sometimes a lot of it's just kind of figuring out where the details lie in the history. And probably about 75, 80% of the time, the history is enough to give me a good indication as to what's going on. A lot of times I don't even need to do an exam on these patients. So that's one thing. The first thing they're going to do is get a really, really good history. Figure out all of the details of your history, of your past, of your current sexual encounters, who you're having sex with, when when the libido issue started.
Um, you know, there's like classic times, well, you know, I haven't had a libido since the birth of my last child. That's kind of a, I get that all the time. Like I was doing fine before that we've got two other kids and all of a sudden we had number three and here we are three years later and I still have zip for drive. And so sometimes it's an instigator getting the details of that. Usually the next thing we talk about is making sure that you guys have a good communication. When there's not good communication, you need a counselor. I highly recommend marriage counseling and sex therapy.
So they're different. They're very different. Sex therapists are much more comfortable talking nitty gritty of everything sex than a regular counselor will be. It's kind of like going to your primary care doctor versus going to your gynecologist to talk about sexual pain. So like do the primary care docs know about that? Yeah. Does a regular counselor have some education about sex problems? Yes. But a sex therapist is going to be infinitely better at working through sexual problems with couples.
So if there's like any interpersonal difficulties, like, hey, we're fighting a lot, we're not communicating well, or heaven forbid, you know, I often find that people have sexual libido issues after one of the partner's cheats. If there's a situation like that, marriage therapy is going to be important and sex therapy. So the sex therapist will kind of guide you through what you're comfortable with, what your partner's comfortable with, where the drive change is not meeting.
So like if he's got a really high sex drive and you've got a really low one, figuring out, hey, she wants to be sub and he wants to be dom or vice versa, or she just wants to be more creative and he doesn't. Those things are figured out. There's also things that the sex therapist will do with like psychological history. A lot of us that grew up in really conservative households where sex was not talked about, not introduced, um, not encouraged.
And then all of a sudden you get married and boom, you're supposed to be able to just have like, you know, steamy sex in the bedroom and you don't even really know your own genitalia, that kind of stuff. Sex therapy will help with. So sometimes getting rid of these old perceptions of sex, like sex is dirty. Sex is wrong. Sex is evil. Um, sexual fluids are gross. Sex therapy kind of helps work through some of that psychological background. So sex therapy and counseling are like uber important. The next thing I would do is check hormones. Hormones are a biggie and it's not just the sex hormones.
So people typically think like testosterone, estrogen, progesterone, but there are several other hormones that have a pretty big impact on your drive. And one of those is thyroid. If your thyroid's off, you cannot fix a sex problem until the thyroid's corrected. Your thyroid hormone, the one that your brain uses to control your thyroid called TSH, looks very, very similar to something called FSH, which is what stimulates your ovaries to produce hormones.
So your thyroid's not working properly it will fiddle with your ovarian hormones so if your testosterone's low and you give him give a patient testosterone but their thyroid's not working it does nothing does that make sense yeah yeah i see what you're saying okay yeah so trying to get thyroid checked making sure that your estrogen progesterone and testosterone are not just at quote unquote normal levels but that they look good in ratio to each other so in a female after the age of like 28 or so your normal level of testosterone and the level of testosterone where you feel good are not the same number.
So a natural testosterone level for somebody, say 42, which is my age, would probably be about eight. A normal testosterone for feeling good is where it used to be when I was 26, which would be anywhere between like 28 and 60. In peri and postmenopausal patients, we actually will float you all the way up to about a hundred. And if we get your testosterone to a hundred and you still don't feel good, it's not the testosterone that's causing the problem. So estrogen and progesterone, I'm going to get into testosterone a little bit more detail in a second.
Estrogen and progesterone normal levels are also different when you're in perimenopause, but it's actually more important for the estrogen to treat stuff like hot flashes and mood swings and night sweats than it does really help with libido. Estrogen doesn't do a lot with libido, but if the estrogen and progesterone ratio are off, that can affect libido.
So you don't want your estrogen too high and your progesterone too low or vice versa, because of that's going to offset how your brain reads testosterone kind of interesting details there all right so testosterone you guys want to dig into testosterone you guys yeah we're with you we're still there we're here we're listening we're taking it all in it's it's a lot of information when i give this counseling to patients like their eyes just get bigger and eventually i'm like okay are okay, are we on overload? Let's take a second, take a breather. All right.
So testosterone has never been FDA approved in females. It probably will never be approved in females because the FDA is a bunch of males. No offense. It's very frustrating for me because there is a plethora of literature showing both the safety and efficacy of testosterone in females for libido. Hundreds and hundreds of studies. There's, I think, near the same amount of evidence for testosterone in females than there is for Viagra in men. So it's safe, it works, but it's not FDA approved.
So it will need to be done through typically a compounding pharmacy, and it won't be covered under insurance. Most of the data that we've got for female testosterone is doing it topically. So I know pellets are like super popular, and a lot of people get the pellets. Pellets make me nervous. There's a couple of reasons for that, not the least of which is that it's never been studied outside of the company that makes it as far as I know. So we don't know that doing it through an injectable pellet is safe.
I also fairly often see patients that have been on pellets or are currently taking pellets and they're very overdosed because the people that are doing them aren't really well-versed in what they're doing. So when you start getting your testosterone levels too high in females, you get side effects. And some of those are permanent. So stuff like acne and hair growth in places you don't want it, like on your chin and around your nipples, typically starts when a female's testosterone hits somewhere between 120 and 150. And once you get above like 200, 250, you start getting stuff like aggression.
So it gets super moody and angry. Yeah. And when you get too much higher than that, you can start actually getting stuff that I can't fix, like deepening voice, changing of the bone structure of the face and something called clitoromegaly, which is clitoral growth. So your clitoris starts turning into a penis. The problems with that is clitoromegaly is not good because it doesn't mean that it's any more sensitive. And in fact, sometimes it becomes hypersensitive in a bad way. So growing the clitoris is a bad deal. And again, bone structure and deepening voice cannot be fixed.
Once those start, they're permanent. Oddly enough, the hair growth is permanent too. So once you make a, what we call a terminal hair or one of those dark hairs, it's like stiff, you have to laser that bad boy off or else you'd be plucking it the rest of your life. So making sure that your testosterone levels are being done by somebody who knows what they're doing is really important. Most of the data, like I said, is topical. And so that's how I do it. I typically go through compounding pharmacies to do the topical dosing because that's the cheapest route to go.
I'm a little picky about which pharmacies I'll send to. It has to be one that I'm familiar with and that I know well enough to fairly comfortably say, hey, I think this is being done correctly. And that's the route that we go. The level should be checked at least six weeks after initial dosing for testosterone because some women absorb it really good and some really don't. And it's impossible to guess on the front end who's going to be who. So checking it about six to eight weeks later is the best timing because that's when testosterone hits what we call steady state.
So it kind of rises slowly over time, hits a peak, and stays there. And then we check it, and we kind of know at that point how you're absorbing it and know where to go on the dosing. Okay. So backing up a little bit, the pellet thing, so how does that work? They put a pellet where? Like it's under your skin? Yeah.
Typically, they're actually given into the fat of your buttocks yes they they take so it's almost like a literally like a pellet a pill or something like that that they inject into your butt and then it just slowly releases not into your butt hole but like she's a child i'm sorry i'm sorry and that And that just dissolves over time and releases testosterone. It does. Yeah, it's supposed to dissolve slowly over time, releasing whatever they put in it, testosterone, estrogen, progesterone, what have you. And it's usually about every three to six months that they will swap those out. Okay.
But you're saying that's not super well documented or studied to your knowledge. It's not well studied outside of the company that makes it, which is what makes me nervous. The other thing is, like I said, there's a lot of practitioners that are doing it that have had, you know, one four day training with the company and that's all they know about hormones. And so they don't really understand the nuances of it, which makes me a little more nervous. They also tend to do a lot of labs that are potentially unnecessary and really expensive to the patients and it's all out of pocket.
And the provider is the one who makes the money off of that. And for me personally, I don't want to be guided on a decision making for a patient because of something that makes me money. So I try really hard to stay away from that kind of thing. Um, if the pellets were proven to be like super great outside of the company itself and that we could show, Hey, these dosing protocols are really, you know, work well, et cetera, then I, I would be less like resistant to it. But it's not like I'm saying people shouldn't do it. It just makes me uncomfortable. Okay. And then the topical, is it a lotion?
Like what, what is that exactly? So you get it. It's usually compounded in some type of an ointment. Okay. Yeah. And then you just apply it to your skin anywhere? Apply it to your skin. Yeah, anywhere you want to. Or do you put that on your butt too? You can put that on your butthole if you want to. There you go, Lacey. Usually what I recommend for where to place it, upper inner arm is kind of a good spot.
There's about 10% of when they do topical testosterone may grow a hair patch where they put it and your upper inner arm doesn't have any hair follicles so that's kind of a nice spot put it in at night make sure that right before you go to bed put it on and rub it in until it feels like it's pretty much absorbed which is usually like three to five minutes i know that sounds like a ridiculous amount of time so if you just sleep naked that makes it easier because then you don't have to rub it in all the ways it'll just rub it on its own overnight well that might help with your libido too if you're sleeping naked maybe you'll get turned on it's like a twofer twofer right how do you do you met like how do you measure how much cream you put on your arm so they actually have what we call meter dosing so when I send a prescription for testosterone to a compounding pharmacy, I tell them how much to put into the compound.
And then I tell them how much the patient should be putting on every night. And so it's typically either like one pump or two pumps or one click or two clicks. So the pharmacy will put it into a device that gives them a specific dose. I'm good at three pumps.
That's like the sweet spot for's like the sweet spot I do have some patients that'll fiddle around with their own amounts that cracks me up well I did two pumps for about three weeks and then I tried one pump and then I did a half a pump and I'm like oh god and now I can't figure out what your testosterone is doing based on how I prescribed it you're getting funny that's funny so do whatever that the right amount of pumps that the doctor tells you. Yeah. Don't do your own pump. Exactly. Right. Yeah. Don't pump on your own there. Okay.
And then you go back and you check their testosterone and you're just trying to make sure it's at a good spot. Make sure it's where I want it to be. I usually underdose my patients at the beginning on purpose. So I base it a little bit on where they're starting. Like if a female has a testosterone of two, I'm going to give her a little bit of a higher dose and guess on it. If somebody shows up at my office with crappy libido and their testosterone is like 25, they may not need as much.
So I kind of guess based on that, but I tend to try and underdose because I would much rather not give them really bad acne and terminal hairs in the six weeks that they're waiting to see me back. That's a good call. Yeah, I don't want hair on my nipples either. You already have hair on your nipples. Come on, Dan. I shave it. I don't like it. You should wax it or get it lasered off much better. That sounds scary. I don't know about that. You'll be okay. Waxing hurts like a mother. Lacey waxes my eyebrows, and I'm not a big fan of that. I don't know about my nipples.
That would be a little rough. Okay. You can man up. You can do this. Yep. All right. So other treatments besides testosterone that is out there? Yes, there are other treatments. So for males, you guys have a lot of stuff. Us females, we have two options.
i like to tell my patients that there's two areas of the female brain that have functioning for sex one of them sees a naked partner and says oh that naked partner looks nice and the other part of your brain says there's dishes in my sink and my kids are awake fuck no so the two medications that we have one makes that naked person look a lot sweeter and the other one makes the dishes disappear. Does that make sense? Yeah. Okay. So the one that makes the naked person look better, it's called Vilesi. It is a injectable medication.
So if you want to want to have sex, typically we say no more than two doses a week. And typically eight doses is what you get in a prescription. The way that stuff works is you inject yourself with it. It is an auto injector. The needle's really tiny. It's like the size of an insulin needle. So you barely feel it. But anywhere between four and 24 hours later, you'll start getting a little jiggy. So you get the desire, you get really kind of tingly, you start getting moist, you start getting the desire to have sex.
So, and the reason I say four to 24 hours is because it literally can take that long. Now it's supposed to happen between four and six hours after you take it. But in the studies, there were patients that were all the way out to 24 hours and that's just downright inconvenient. So I usually tell my patients the first time, you know, fair warning, we don't know exactly when this is going to kick in. So maybe use it when it's just date night and not your anniversary. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah.
So you give yourself the injection and then somewhere around four to six hours later, you start feeling like you want to have sex because your body starts responding as if it's getting aroused, which typically will kind of kick your brain in gear. And that, that's one medication. So when you want to want to have sex, that's your deal. The other medication is the one that I prescribe infinitely more often. And because most females, when they're having a libido problem, that's related to something other than testosterone, it's because they're distracted. Again, there's dishes in the sink.
It's been a long day. My kids are awake. I didn't sleep enough last night. And they get into sex and they're receptive to being instigated. So they'll be like, yeah, well, we had sex, but the entire time that he was fucking me, I was like, God, I just want to go to sleep. Or God, I could be doing laundry right now. That stuff is running through their heads. So they can't focus on sex because they're having a hard time enjoying it because everything else keeps popping into their head.
It's sort of like the same type of anxiety type symptoms when people are trying to get to sleep, but their brain won't shut up. Like I saw a meme today and it said, this is my wife. And she was like sleeping. And then her eyes popped open and said, where the fuck is my birth certificate? Yeah. Right. It's the random shit that pops into your head. It's that kind of distraction during sex. This medication is called Addy, A-D-D-Y-A-D kind of distraction during sex. This medication is called Addy, A-D-D-Y-I or flibanserin. It was the first libido medication put out onto the market for females.
And it is a really interesting medication. It was originally being developed by a company, I think in Germany as an antidepressant. So let me give you a little quick didbit on antidepressants. There are three different targets for antidepressants. Most of the antidepressants target one or two of those targets. This one, they were trying to target all three. So they were doing this for depression to begin with. They got partway through the study and it leaked that the women were all getting horny on this medication. And a company in the United States says, uh, can I buy that from you?
And so they stopped the study and another company bought it and started checking it for libido. So it works like an antidepressant. And now everybody else knows as does Lacey that antidepressants typically shoot your libido. This medication turns up the volume and it cranks it pretty hardcore. About 70% of patients will respond to this medication and it takes about six to eight weeks. So think of it kind of like an antidepressant. It's sort of got to build up in your system.
What I usually tell my patients is the first week that you're taking Addy, when he smacks on the hiney, your skin doesn't crawl anymore. The second week when he smacks you on the hiney, you think, hey, you know what? I actually didn't mind that. The third week when he smacks you on the hiney, you're like, hey, let's go. Yeah. And by the fourth week, you're smacking him on the hiney. I love it. So somewhere between four and six weeks, most patients will start noticing a difference. If you don't get any difference by week eight, it's not going to work for you.
It has the best side effect profile on the market. I'm not joking. It is an amazing side effect profile. So the first thing is you have to take it at night because it makes you sleepy. It will make you tired. In fact, you will have the best night's sleep on this medication. It is amazing for this. But I always have to warn my patients, it may give you a hangover in the morning until you kind of get used to it. So first couple of weeks, expect you might be a little sleepy in the morning after. The second thing is it reduces anxiety and depression.
Yes, that's a side effect of the medication because it hasn't been studied for that. Yeah. I know, right? Oh, no, it gets better than that. It actually may make you lose weight too accidentally without having to work for it. So those are the three most common side effects, sleepiness, reduction in anxiety and depression, and weight loss. So why isn't this as big as Viagra? That's my question. Like why doesn't everybody know about this? Because this is the first time I've ever heard about it. It's for women and not for men.
And most of the insurance companies won't pay for it yeah it should be out there everybody should know about this stuff i think it should be in the water i mean like this looks great everybody should be taking addy do the men not realize that they got to work on the women to get laid like the men need to approve all of this stuff so they can get laid it would be so much easier right okay so my thought is is that most men just assume they can find another woman that's already jiggy yeah and in the lifestyle that that might be true but you also may end up divorced and that sucks so yeah no it's it's the best medication out there i really really do like love this medication um and a lot of patients do really well on it there are some caveats to it you're not allowed to drink alcohol within two hours of taking it per the recommendations now the reasoning for that is actually kind of um what's the word i'm looking for debatable that's being very kind the way they actually studied it initially is they made people drink an entire bottle of wine and Thank you.
um, what's the word I'm looking for? Debatable. That's being very kind. The way they actually studied it initially is they made people drink an entire bottle of wine and then take the medication and see how they felt. And they discovered that their blood pressure dropped. What's funny enough is the people that they tried this on were mostly males and not females. So yeah, it's kind of debatable, but you're not supposed to drink alcohol around the time of taking it because it may drop your blood pressure. That's kind of like the biggest caveat.
And the other one is that you've got to take it at night. Because if you take it during the day, you will pass out. Like out. Yeah. That sounds like amazing though. More people should know. Yeah. People should know. People should know about this stuff. It's so sad.
It's so sad that people don't know about this yeah and if they're wanting to google it it's commonly known as the little pink pill so viagra is the little blue pill this is the little pink pill yeah all of their marketing is in fluorescent pink i'm sure i mean how expensive it like you said it's expensive is it expensive or how expensive is it affordable ish it's definitely affordable um there's a coupon, at least in our area, which I'm pretty sure the coupon is nationwide, that you can get typically three months for $200. So if you divvy that out, it's about $70 a month, which isn't awful.
No. Yeah. So it's more than Viagra, but not like – Oh, hell yeah. But I assume if they got – You do have to take it every day. Yeah. Yeah. It's not like Viagra where you have to take it right before you have sex. You're supposed to take this medication daily. Yeah. So it would be more expensive. That makes sense. If you had to take Viagra every day, it probably would be about that cost. Yeah. Probably. Yeah. It would be less cost effective if you were having to take it monthly. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, that's good to know. Okay. Is that it? Is Is that any other treatments that are those?
Yeah, those are the medical treatments that are like FDA approved and ones that have been studied in the literature. Now there's a lot of people that, um, swear by a lot of different types of supplements. Um, and I, you know, I, I hate to speak to supplements because I just don't have enough data on them. And I am a doctor at heart.
The, the doctor in me wants enough data to be like, for sure i know this works before i throw it out there but there's a lot of you know kind of common things that people say help with libido not the least of which is pineapples yeah pineapples and eggplant for two of them really yeah we hear a lot about what these ox oxygen boosters what do you call it? What is that? Some kind of supplement that's supposed to boost? Antioxidants? Yes. Antioxidants. There you go. Is that, is that real? Is there anything to do? Antioxidants are just good for you in general.
Antioxidants do a couple of different things. They sop up what's called free radicals. Free radicals in your system is typically what causes stuff like your vessels to constrict and be hard. So they increase risk for heart attacks. Um, they cause blood pressure problems. They're typically released by like eating crappy food, like fried stuff. So taking antioxidants reduces risk for cardiac disease and that sort of thing. Anything that will improve blood flow will help with stuff like erections and clitoral stimulation.
So it's never a bad for those purposes um but like technically taking antioxidants for the purpose of libido hasn't really been studied okay gotcha that i know of a lot of people ask me about supplement like the things that you can just buy at walmart like there's a lot of different brands um that you can buy and i've even taken those before but honestly haven't really noticed the big difference so i'm all when people ask me, I'm just like, I don't know the answer to that. Yeah, I mean, it's not going to probably hurt to take it, I guess. I don't know. You're the doctor. What do you think?
Most of the supplements aren't dangerous, thank goodness. The supplements that people are taking to attempt to treat libido, most of them aren't dangerous. They don't have like blood thinning qualities and that sort of thing. Um, but I would, I would say we don't have a lot of data on them for libido. Now, if you're having problems with like hot flashes and night sweats, yeah, there's some supplements that we've got good data on for that, but will it help with your libido? We don't really know. Gotcha.
But if you're not having high night sweats and hot flashes, you're probably more likely to want to have sex though.
point good point and typically if you have problems with those things you're also having testosterone issues and you won't get that over the counter without a prescription sadly yeah okay well as i said that was a lot that's a there was a lot of good information in there a lot i learned a lot i didn't know there was a pink pill that that is news to me i mean i've heard about it i'm going to i've heard about it on my website yeah i mean i've heard people talk about i just didn't know if it was a real thing i didn't know yeah it's just or yeah it's like you hear about stuff like that and you're like is this a supplement that people you know yeah i didn't know over the counter like you know miracle supplement that this is a real legitimate miracle prescription yeah this is a real prescription you get a doctor to prescribe it.
And gosh darn it, that stuff's amazing. And if a woman's never had her hormones checked, at what age or what is there? I mean, I know you said if her libido is low, but if she's doing pretty good, is there an age that she should have these things checked, like preventative just to kind of see or just kind of wait until something happens? You got to wait until you're symptomatic. And the only reason I say that is women's hormones fluctuate minute by minute. Okay. So it's not like in males where you check testosterone and it's going to be the same today, tomorrow, and next Tuesday.
Women, our estrogen levels change by the minute and by the hour, by the day. So just checking levels when you're asymptomatic is kind of useless. Now when you're symptomatic, then we treat based on symptoms and you don't necessarily even really need to check hormone levels unless you're going to replace something like testosterone or if they're having libido issues, in which case I like to check and see if my estrogen progesterone ratios are off. Okay. Awesome. That's all good information. Very good. All right. Well, I think that covered all of the libido stuff.
I think I learned more about libido today than I even knew I needed to know. Me too. And I'm a woman. I should know some of this. And I feel like I learned a lot. All right. Good.
Hey, you're not the first woman to said like, hey, the only thing I know about libido is that my antidepressants are shooting it that's really i mean honestly that's what i know i mean that's what well that's the other thing i mean if you're going to be on antidepressants why not be on the antidepressant that makes you horny like i mean i agree amen okay so the main reason is because we don't know for sure that Addy, it's not been fully studied as an antidepressant. Does it work for that? Yeah.
Have I been able to wean my patients off their antidepressants after I put them on Addy all the time? But it's not technically FDA approved as an antidepressant. Yeah. Somebody might be talking to her doctor here soon. Although I don't know if a more horny Lacey is a good idea or not. I know, I was going to say 70% more horny. That's a lot, babe. Are you ready for that? He's going to need a more Viagra. Yeah. I need a bigger, better Viagra prescription. Okay. All right. Is there anything, Dr. Store, that you'd like?
Do we have anything in Discord or any questions that came up over the last six weeks or so that we've talked to you that you wanted to address near in the last 10 minutes? I was about to say the last couple of things that have been on discord for me were actually libido related. So, um, or ones that I've already kind of addressed or were like particular personal issues that wouldn't necessarily be like grand information. But yeah, no, um, libido has been a hot topic the last couple of months on the discord as well. I've gotten several questions about that.
So, so if somebody wants to ask her a question and they're, they're in our discord, how do they go about doing that? Yeah. So if you're in our discord, which is a swimmer society discord, which you can find links to that in all of Lacey's socials, whether you're on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram, um, there's in the link tree, you'll find a link to discord. You just download the discord app and then you click on that link and you'll find our website discord. Um, Dr. Store actually has her own channel, uh, in there now and you can go and you can, uh, you can message her there.
Um, and I think you, you've given permission for people to DM you if it's a private question and they don't want to ask in the public in the channel. So, um, you there and ask her all the things. And we take those. Go ahead. I'm sorry. I was just going to say also, if you guys haven't been going for the magazine, you guys need to read the magazine. I'm contributing to that too. And this time they asked me to do penile fracture. So even though I'm a gynecologist, I tackled a male issue.
And if anybody wants to know know about penile fracture it's coming out in april we don't talk a lot about the magazine here yeah that's actually a great plug so alt life magazine if you don't if you haven't known that our discord server is publishing their own magazine now we have a whole editorial staff dr store is part of that um and it comes out monthly we have monthly articles and it's I think it's Alt Life Magazine or thealtlifemagazine.com. We'll tag it below. Yeah, we'll put that in the show notes so you can get there. And did you know, Dr.
Soar, Alt Life Magazine is in the running for an ASN award. ASN does lifestyle. Really? Yep, the best lifestyle. It's like the best of the best in the lifestyle. So they have Best Magazine, Best Podcast, Best Buy Event, Best Club. And Alt Life Magazine is in that, in the top 10. Which means they're in the top 10 right now. That's exciting. Oh, my gosh. Yay. Congratulations. I know. So the top five actually get the nomination. So if you haven't voted for Alt Life and the Swing Nation podcast, we will link that below. And you can vote every day until April 15th. Yes.
That's our little shameless plug there. Great shameless plug for bringing that up. You're welcome. You didn't even probe me for that one. I just pulled it out of my ass. Yeah, you did so good. You did great. All right. So if people want to find you, you're in Discord, but you have a website now. And how do they find your website? It's SwingingSafe. I think it's SwingingSafe.com and.org. Go to the same spot. But SwingingSafe.com is the website. And I'm slowly but surely getting extra stuff up there.
We just started downloading some videos that you can get access to, um, that are like really specific to specific topics. So we're working on that. Right. And then you're also, you do YouTube videos. What's your YouTube handle? Oh, um, it's linked on swing. It's linking on swings. Yeah. It's linked on swinging safe.com. Um, it, I think it's, um, Curiosities. Okay. We'll link it. It's the name of the YouTube. Yeah. Link it. Yeah. I got on TikTok recently, too. I got baited onto TikTok. So if you go onto my TikTok, you'll find me. Yeah. That's Angie Stower, MD. Gotcha.
The baiting, you'll see what I mean by that when you get in there. I got dragged into it because of a personal issue in my my family so well you can find her at all the places i it's good to see you you know when we first talked to you you were i think you were on youtube with your your one platform so you're you're growing you're going everywhere yeah yeah i'm kind of i'm trying to spread out i'm not much of for social media to be completely honest and my husband's kind of making me do it. We don't blame you. Yeah, we get it. We feel you on that. All right.
Well, anything else you want to say before we go? No, that's it. You guys are great, just in case you didn't know. Somebody hasn't told you recently. Thank you. We appreciate that. Well, we're hoping to see you here soon at Naughty in New Orleans. This is right around the corner. So Dr. Storr is in the running for a guest speaker spot there. And so we hope to finally meet you in person at Naughty, if that works out. Yep. All right. I think with that, in a world full of apples. Be the pineapple. Be the pineapple, guys. Bye. Bye.
If you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us leave a five-star review wherever you're listening if you want to see more of our content you can find links to snapchat twitter instagram only fans and more in the show notes come join the conversation with us and other swinger content creators on our swinger society discord server if you have or feedback, email them to us at theswingnation at gmail.com. Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up to date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.
