Send us Fan MailThe Swing Nation PodcastLifestyle Interview: How to live a Life of Spice | Episode 45 In this swinger podcast episode, Dan and Lacy finally get a chance to sit down and talk with their good friends and fellow content creators Life of Spice. They discuss everything from how they got into the lifestyle to why they decided to go public and start sharing their lifestyle so openly to the world. If you love Life of Spice as much as we do, this is a must listen episode! DJ Life of Spice_______________- The Swing Nation -Main WebsiteQuick Navigation Website: -- (Find all our social media links more!)Follow us on Facebook!The Podcast Website_______________ - Swinger Society -Our Website to meet, connect eventsSwinger Society DiscordOur Facebook Group_______________ - Swinger Websites -SDCUsername: TheSwingNation** Use code 36313 for 14 days free! **SLSUsername: NorthernGuynSouthernGirl_______________ - Merch More -The Swing Nation MerchThe Swinger Pride FlagsSwinger Society Merch_______________ - Lacy’s Fun Links -VIP OnlyFansPREMIUM OnlyFans_______________ -- THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS --Shameless Care: ED Medication and at home STD testingUse Code TSN at checkout for $30 off your order!Promescent® Make Love Longer, It’s Time for Great SexUse Code SwingNation for 5% off!Pinaq Liqueur; The Official Drink of The Swing NationUse Code TSN at checkout for 15% off!Non-monogamy Couples Course and Single Guy Mastery CourseUse Code ATLANTA for 50% off!Support the show- Thank you for the support! -
Transcript
This podcast is intended for adult audiences over the age of 18. It contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice.
welcome to the swing nation podcast a podcast by swingers for swingers where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe interview the experts learn and grow together join the nation so lacy people are asking how do they get to go to a party or an event with us they check out swingersociety.net you create a profile profile, you sign up for an event, and you come hang out with us. It's super easy. That's right.
If you want to party with us and the other faces and names that you know from social media and TikTok, head on over to swingersociety.net. Can't wait to see you there. Lacey, we get approached by couples all the time and they want to know, like, where can they learn the one-on-ones of non-monogamy? Yeah, I totally get it. You want to get in the lifestyle, but you just don't know where to start. We recommend Sex by Sue's class on non-monogamy. She really helps couples learn how to communicate and do the lifestyle the correct way.
Yeah, I think this lifestyle, you know, it's crucial not to step on the landmines that a lot of us do. Yeah. And you kind of learn the hard way, you know. So having a class that you can take online, you know, in the privacy of your own home and kind of learn the ins and outs, learn, you know, how to approach the lifestyle, how to communicate with your partner about it. You know, I think it's something worth taking and we highly recommend it. Yeah. So click below in the show notes. You'll find this link for that course.
it out guys bye hey there pineapple people and welcome to the swing nation podcast we are your Guy and Southern Girl. In today's episode, we are sitting down with some of our, I would dare say, close friends at this point. Yeah, I agree. For a podcast, which I think it's been a long time coming. We've tried to connect with them a few times, but I think we always get caught up partying and always forget to break out the podcast gear. This is're here with Mr. and Mrs. Spice. Welcome, guys. Hey, guys. How are you? Thank you for having us. Thanks for joining us. We appreciate it.
And they are remote, but they're here in our hearts, I think. Yeah. Always. Yes, always. All right.
So I think where we wanted to start out with you you guys is kind of where we start out with with most um lifestyle people we talk to is can you give us kind of the story of how you guys met and then kind of how you found your way into the lifestyle absolutely well first off thank you for having us and we really miss you guys i think we've been doing like all the events with you guys for like past like handful of months and stuff and i know this last month we divided and conquered and went to two different events so we miss you guys and we're excited to catch up with you guys soon in august for uh podcast uh anniversary so that'll be super fun um i'm gonna let wifey kind of tell the story i like the way she tells the story of how we kind of got into it okay well we've been together now for 11 years and I'd say a year into dating we watched this movie and I can't for the life of you remember the title of the movie but basically it's about a group of friends going on a trip together and eventually they were exploring their sexuality and like it just turned into like a big orgy and after the movie we kind of looked at each other it was like how do you feel about that yeah we're like that was a really hot movie and mind you we're in college we're 19 and 20 we're we just moved away from home we're just in that exploration stage but um we really liked each other so we were like let's see like where this can go and I kind of just took off from there um I think like a couple weeks later we hooked up with my roommate yeah oh wow because that that concept of exploring together I guess I that didn't even cross my mind i kind of thought hey you know when you are in a relationship that's your focus and that's what you do and you know you're kind of done out there exploring and all that so after we watched that movie and had that conversation it's like well we can explore together like how cool is that that kind of just never crossed my mind so um that was mind blowing to me to be like, I could partner up with this awesome person, have her by my side and explore together.
So that's kind of what got us started in the lifestyle. Well, I also wanted to explore my bisexuality, but I was like, I don't want to miss out on dating this awesome guy. So it kind of worked out in my favor. And I do not mind. Most guys don't. Yeah. And so like you said, like, okay, the first hookup with a college roommate or somebody like that. Did you, you know, was it you were just finding people in college and kind of exploring? Like at what point did you figure out like there's a community of people that this is like a thing for?
There's a lifestyle of people out there that are doing this. Did you guys stumble into that? That's a really good question because it actually took us quite a while to even know that we were in the lifestyle because we were in college. So we were kind of just exploring with our friends, other couples, maybe some parallel play, maybe playing with some unicorns.
But mind you, at the time, we didn't know any of of the terminology we just thought we were wild and we were having fun we just knew we were different than our vanilla friends um so all these we were just hooking up with our friends for like the first seven years um none of them are in the lifestyle now i think they were just exploring maybe it was a one and done for them but it stuck with us we were like no we're in this forever And that just kind of became part of were just exploring. Maybe it was a one and done for them, but it stuck with us. We were like, no, we're in this forever.
And that just kind of became part of our dynamic exploring together. And we love that. I think that's one thing that kind of like brought us even closer at the time. So it probably took us a couple of years until maybe we went on social media and saw people using terminology. And I'm like, babe, I think we're swingers. He's like, really? I'm like, I think that's what we are. I'm like, swingers? Oh, that, you know, I'm not sure about that. What's a swinger? And, you know, you have maybe your preconceived notions of what that is.
And then we kind of just started finding similarities and, you know, terms and stuff that kind of described what we do.
And that point was really awesome a few years into it because that opened the door to a whole new world of, oh, wow, there's a whole years into it because that opened opened the door to a whole new world of oh wow there's a whole community of people like-minded individuals um and then we really begin got to begin exploring maybe um going to some clubs um going to events and meeting new people so that was a breath of fresh air to for us to realize oh we're we're not just crazy yeah there's other people like us and it feels good yeah and so that's i've i've we've kind of talked about this a little bit a few times but we've never really delved into it how like what you know you say you guys are swingers how would you describe your relationship because i've heard you guys say things like you're open to poly you know do you have a term a term?
Do you, do you know kind of what your, where your limits and boundaries are? Or are you guys just kind of open to exploring more? Well, we're definitely open to whatever life brings our way. I would say for the most part, we're, I'm going to steal this from Bella Fourplace. She talks about being like emotionally monogamous. So I have, me and her have this, that bond emotionally, that intimacy, that emotional intimacy where I don't share that with, with anybody else. We're definitely non-monogamous in the sense of playing with different partners and all that stuff.
But in the past we have had relations with other individuals as well. Yeah, we have. Well, like I said, for a while, we didn't know the terms of what lifestyle we were living. We just knew we were open emotionally, physically, just to whatever attracted us at the time. So we did form emotional connections with a couple of females and um one, one really close male friend too. Um, my husband is not bi, but he did form an emotional connection with his, with his best friend. And it was a three of us for a while. So we've tried the girlfriend thing. Um, it was pretty great.
Um, I'm, I'm open to it again, the future, but we're not actively looking like we were in the past i think that was maybe a goal for us before we were i was like i really want us to have a girlfriend um but now we're just kind of like enjoying the swinging part more i feel right so so currently you'd say you're more of swingers than you are a polyamorous couple but yeah yeah could you could be swayed if you found the right people exactly if connections form more we would just talk about it with the other person or people and see where that goes we're not we're not like against it but also not actively looking for it so exactly just open to whatever life brings our way and that's that mentality we try to have for kind of anything we come across.
Yeah. Me and Lacey, you know, we talk about you guys all the time. But it's something we like about you guys that you just you're such a go with the flow and kind of, you know, you know, very in tune with your emotions, very in tune with kind of, you know, vibes and feelings. And it's just it's very interesting to see a couple like that, that is just, you know, you don't have hard limits. It's just kind of like, let's see what happens and we'll talk about it and we'll communicate through it and we'll just, we'll just go with it.
I think it shows that how long you've been together and been in the lifestyle.
You definitely seem like a seasoned couple who have kind of seen a little bit of everything and probably worked through it where a lot of our friends are probably more newer in the lifestyle, I say would you agree yeah no i think you guys just have a much i don't know more open approach i think to it than i've seen with a lot of other couples that are very hard you know these are our rules these are our boundaries we don't do this we don't do that you guys are kind of like well we'll just see what happens and we'll go with it and we'll communicate through it and you know we're open to seeing what happens sure and I think that's the cool thing about the lifestyle is every couple can kind of play it and have it as they like, you know, every couple can have a different set of boundaries, a different set of rules, a different set of preferences.
And that's one thing that attracts me to the lifestyle is you have so many people with different mindsets, but everyone's open-minded under the, exactly under this huge umbrella. And you can kind of find other like-minded couples that fit your preferences and your boundaries and what you're looking for. So just, just that openness in general is something that really appeals to us. And I think that's why we love the community so much. Yeah, it's, it's interesting.
We just had a conversation with Robert from shameless care and that episode isn't even out yet, but, uh, we were talking to him with kind of about similar things. And he was saying he, he isn't sure if it's good communicators that find the, if, uh, good communicators find the lifestyle or if being in the lifestyle makes you a good communicator. But it seems like people in the lifestyle seem to be more in tuned, uh, with the, each other and emotions and also better at communicating those, um, emotions to each other and others. Absolutely. All right.
So the next big question is what made you guys kind of go public on TikTok and social media and share with the world this non-monogamy that you had discovered? It all started during quarantine.
Yeah, I was going to say, I think during quarantine, a lot of people got bored and I heard about the app tiktok and i heard it was very addicting but i was like i'm just gonna go for it i'm just gonna download it i'm bored and i found myself on the non-monogamy side of tiktok and i was like babe this is where we need to be i'm like this is where we find our people like this is gonna be so great for us and um you sound like Dan right and we at the time too we were like you know I we want to make some extra money like I think maybe starting an OnlyFans would be a cool way to show how spicy our sex life could be I feel like people would be really interested in seeing that and um that so it kind of went hand in hand we we were sitting at the kitchen table and we're like okay if we're gonna create a profile we need to come up with a cool name and that's kind of how life is spice was born we're just we always talk about keeping life spicy so that just kind of just came off the cuff and we ran with it.
And I guess here we are today. We just wanted to share our journey because for years and years, before we even started creating content and all that, when I first met her many, many moons ago, she loved recording our playtime. That was like totally one of her kings. I loved it.
At first, I was like, it made me a little nervous, but was so much fun like we would we would have some fun like low-key sent to our friends yeah we'd like watch it back i think that's like all swingers you know like if you think about it yeah i mean we have got a lot of flack for recording both of us have um are recording you know us swapping with couples but swingers as a whole tend to record themselves and send it to their friends they're just doing it for free yeah like it's just it's just hot well we're typically like sex positive and we like to share experiences give each other new ideas maybe a sweet brag look at this hey that open-mindedness and that fun it kind of has always been something on our radar so when she proposed this idea that hey i maybe want to start an only fans and share you know our spicy sex life and meet other spicy people it wasn't so far-fetched because we've kind of already been doing that for many many years so it was kind of like a natural transition i'd say and you know it's funny one of the ways i would like lure our our girlfriends into the bed was to actually dress up in lingerie and be like hey you want to take pictures in the room and like start to feel like sexy and it's funny because when we do collaborations that's exactly what we do now we dress in lingerie and we take pictures and then we film and I'm like I always get flashbacks I this is what i used to do when i was like 21 just like dressing up with girls in lingerie but not just to have yeah that's always in my move and i'm just like laughing now i'm just doing it as a job yeah we can totally relate to the the moving to only fans being a very easy transition because it's the same for us.
We were taking pictures. We were making naughty videos. So really, there wasn't a whole lot of extra work because we were already doing that. It was just a matter of putting them on a website and selling them. So again, totally can relate. That was exactly our mindset going into OnlyFans as well. yeah i think it it makes a lot. And it's funny that a lot of our friends, most of our friends are on OnlyFans and swingers. It does seem like one goes very in hand with the other. I mean, we already like to share. I think that's part of it. Exactly. Share content.
And you get inspiration from others' content too. You go, oh, wow, that looks fun. I want to try that. So the sharing kind of, you know, gives you some ideas and start the wheels start turning inside the brain. Oh, I think we'd like that, too. So you keep learning. And that's what's fun about the lifestyle, too, is you're always learning something new about your relationship, about yourself and other things you can maybe want to try and stuff. So it just keeps life spicy all the time. Yeah. So once you guys got on TikTok and social media and started kind of sharing, did people find out?
Did people start recognizing you? I mean, you guys have pretty big accounts. Was there any repercussions from that? Well, we're lucky in the sense that our reputation precedes us. So it wasn't much of a surprise to any of our friends for us, you know, kind of being non-monogamous or, you know, being on TikTok sharing that. So it wasn't too much of a surprise in that regard. As far as family, wasn't too much of a surprise for them either.
they kind of had their their hints and whatnot yeah and if you want to talk i could probably lead into the story of like my dad and stepmom how they're also swingers um and when we actually told them they were like oh we've known for years and i'm like how how did you know for years and like oh we just we just knew um and it was kind of cool to connect with them in that way maybe extra flirty with the friend here with the friend there going on trips and stuff i think swingers can pick up other swingers like i think we can see lifestyle people i mean even down to like what they wear i mean dan and i were walking at the like the like, a month or two ago, and there was a couple walking by, and we both looked at each other and were, like, totally lifestyle.
So I can see how if your parents were swingers, they could pick up those habits that y'all had.
So at what point, you know, this is this whole your parents being swingers is an interesting thing to me because it's one of the, you know know and you probably know the same thing uh we get questioned a lot on what if your children find out like it's going to scar them it's going to ruin their life like how could you do that to them your poor children um you know you coming from the kind of the other side of it finding out that your parents are swingers I mean how did that affect you when did you find out were you already in the lifestyle before you figured it out or did you find out younger like at what point did you discover that I probably found out about eight years ago um I always knew like they always had hot friends around like and they were all always couples and I knew like when they would start to drink they would be a little touchy and I would always go to my husband and be like babe do you think that they like they like hook up for something?
And he's like, nah, that's your dad. Like, don't look at it that way. And I'm like, but I feel like maybe, I don't know. So I overheard him say a couple of stories to their friends while they were partying and some like sexual stories.
And I'm like, I think that they are swingers I don't know so I think fast forward maybe years later I saw on Facebook one of their friends tagged them in a picture and it said like bliss cruise in the background of one of the pictures I was like bliss cruise so I googled bliss cruise and the first thing that comes up is swingers cruise I I was like i knew it i knew they were swingers so that's kind of how that happened yeah and i finally told them because i didn't want to run into them at events and so yeah you can go ahead and say the rest of the story we were gonna go on the bliss cruise because it sounded like a really good time but we kind of had an an inkling that they were going to go.
So we had friends, mutual friends that we all have, Bill and Jace from Foreplay, and they were going on the cruise. So we were like, hey, if you, I think she sent them a photo of her parents and said, if you see them, you know, say hi to them. These are our parents.
So they actually met her parents on the Bliss Cruise before we ever met Bill and Jace, which a great segue for us when we saw her parents um maybe a month or so later um and that opened up the conversation because hey you saw our friends over there yeah they were really nice it was really good meeting them how do you know them yeah my dad goes wait why were your friends on that cruise i'm like we're swingers too and he's like no way and it was like a really cool connection perfect segue and we spent the rest of the night i think we were playing rummy we spent the rest of the night talking about events and appropriate stories showing us videos of their vacations and you know group photos of their friends and we spent the rest of the night just connecting on that and it was honestly really beautiful it was really cool to finally speak with that so at our wedding my dad invites like 40 of his friends and i was like dad all those people at the wedding were they all swingers and he's like yeah they were that's why they were so much fun they were the most fun group of people at the wedding it was so true about it like lifestyle friends are the best right you know i don't blame your dad for wanting to bring him to your wedding.
Yeah, if we have another wedding, you guys are all invited. Let's just do a big vow renewal and we'll all get re-named. We're going to do a swinger's wedding for Kylie. I mean, that's going to be the next day. Oh, Kylie and Brad's wedding is going to be the next big lifestyle wedding. It sounds like a good time. Yeah, it is. Lifestyle wedding.
So when you discovered that they were swingersers you weren't a swinger yet or you didn't know you were a swinger is that or you had inklings no you what we didn't know we were swingers okay we just like we were playing with our friends at the time like we were kind of like open i guess but we didn't know the term so were you taken back i mean you were obviously living a non-monogamous life, but you didn't realize you were a swinger. So when you found out that your dad was a swinger, did that affect you negatively in any way?
I mean, imagine not because you were already kind of living that life and obviously sexually open, but still when it's your parents, that's a different, that's a whole different ballgame.
No no I honestly like thought it was amazing I was like my dad and I have so much in common I was like I I guess like this is where I get it from I don't know it was actually really cool to it took a lot of courage to just tell him that we were swingers but I think that when we finally did it brought us so much closer than we ever were and so I was actually really excited that I'm like to learn that they were swingers and it was really nice because a lot of the friends that they have around they've had these people around for years like my whole relationship with her for over 10 years I've seen the same couples and all the trips and stuff they go to and we had a really nice conversation about how it's it's so much more than just playing of course you know playing is an aspect of it and all that but it goes so much so much further beyond that the relationships that you make with people in the lifestyle because you can have your guard down these people are open-minded it just kind of creates a and we talk about this all the time when we're at events ourselves and all that like the bond that you create with with people in lifestyle is is something special because you know you can put your guard down and you can kind of be let your hair down be yourself be a little flirty kind of feel free so i i can totally see why their bonds with their friends are are so strong like that and they travel the world together they go on all these trips and vacations and you know support each other emotionally and and all that it's just it was very nice to kind of piece that together and see it from their perspective and when we found you guys we were like i think this is our group of friends like that my dad has and it is really special to see that connection it is dan always said like when we got together, that his goal was to find a group of people that we could travel and go to parties and go to all these events together as a group.
And, I mean, we really have found it. You're absolutely correct. We really have found it with each other. And then, of course, all of our other friends as well. It's kind of amazing. And you're right. You can just be yourself. I think that so many people think it's all about sex. And don't get me wrong. The sex is amazing. But it's just being around like-minded people that is so rewarding. You can just truly be yourself. Absolutely. Okay. I think, Ray, this is a perfect time to segue to a break.
And then we'll take a word from our sponsors, we'll come back and I want to talk to you guys a little bit about, you know, if you have advice for people that are considering this lifestyle, maybe some of the misconceptions that are out there about this lifestyle, we can address some of those, and then kind of maybe talk a little bit about this, this movement that seems to be forming on social media, you know, in the non-monogamy world. So we'll take a little break and we'll get right back. The Swing Nation podcast is proud to announce an official partnership with SDC.com.
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And as swingers, we're all about making sure our partners are well taken care of. And Promescent Delay Spray is the perfect product for that. Click the link in the show notes below to get yours today. All right. Welcome back, guys. Thanks for sticking with us. So we're here with Mr. and Mrs. Spice, and we want to talk a little bit to you guys about what you guys would, you know, we get a lot of listeners that are new. You guys probably encountered a lot on TikTok.
People that are kind of, you know, they've seen a TikTok video or they've, you know, maybe heard the podcast, but they're not really lifestyle people, but maybe they're considering it. So what would what would you say to them? What's a good advice for people like that? The first place I would start, and as cliche as it is, and we all say this all the time, but have an open avenue of communication. First start working on your communication where you are comfortable speaking with your partner about your ideas, your desires, and you can have no shame or no guilt in expressing those.
I say this often, but if you're curious about the lifestyle and you want to bring it up to your partner or you want to try something and bring it up to your partner, a suggestion I throw out every now and then is maybe pick their brain about how they feel about that circumstance or that situation. Um, in the sense of, Hey, I, you know, I saw this, um, how do you feel about it? Or asking exactly. Instead of asking them because permission or exactly. Cause, um, instead of asking them, Hey, can we do this? Or would you do this? Because it could be a tough position being the other partner.
Um, you don't want to say no, because you don't want to deny your partner of trying an experience or something, but you might not be comfortable. So maybe you don't want to say yes, because you're not comfortable with it. You also don't want to say no and, you know, break their heart about it. So one suggestion I throw out often is pick their brain, see, hey, how do you feel about this? Or I saw something, you know, how does that make you feel? Have you ever thought about this? Opening up the avenue of communication, I think, is a great first step.
And once you're in a place where you're comfortable to kind of discuss everything, and you feel like you can throw all your thoughts on them and vice versa, then maybe that's a good place to say, hey, let's check out some some apps in the what do we usually suggest? For what? Finding others. Well, what's been our best one? I always say TikTok because that's where I found all my friends. I would have thought, honestly, that TikTok is where you met some of our greatest friends. It's, it's unbelievable. Yeah, the TikTok thing is weird.
It's because we, and I don't know if it's because we all were kind of trying to do the same thing, right? So we, we all had kind of the same goals. We all have kind of the same, you know, morals and stuff like that. But we're all very, very different people, I think. But with a lot of the connections we've, you know, formed with the influencers and stuff off TikTok, I mean, truly that now I would consider those some of our best friends. Yeah, for sure. In our real life right now. Absolutely.
I think a lot of people don't understand, like, our day in and day out of making TikToks, being public, the things that we are going through. So when you find like-minded people like on TikTok, like Mr. and Ms. Spice, it's, they get it without having to explain it. And I think that's important and nice to have. Absolutely.
Especially with, you know, the creation of content, because sometimes those two worlds, the content creator world and us being in the lifestyle world you know they they kind of venn diagram overlap over each other and you know admittedly those those two worlds can affect each other um but just because you know we create content doesn't mean we're any less lifestyle and and vice versa um so it's really nice to connect kind of connect with all sorts of people and, and everyone kind of has a different balance of, of content to lifestyle, um, or how much discretion they use.
Um, you can be in the lifestyle and like we say all the time, you don't have to be public about it. You can be as discreet as you like about it. And that's something that's like very well respected. So you kind of, you know, you run the gamut on, on all of that, whether you're out publicly or, you know be very discreet, and we all respect that. Yeah. So what would you say are some of the biggest misconceptions that people have about the lifestyle?
One of the biggest misconceptions I see, kind of makes me a little sad, is that it's a solution for a sad marriage or to try to repair or without we're just covering stds oh i hate that comment on tiktok same that we get a lot i feel like we are the most tested yeah community i agree my my response is always what about that like 22 year old that's on Tinder. That's fucking everybody who doesn't ever get tested and probably doesn't wear protection. Like we're actually the opposite. We always use protection. We're tested more frequently than your average person. So we're probably, I agree. Yeah.
Yeah. And I agree. That's it's just, it's just a misfortunate stereotype because your lifestyle, um, doesn't implicate how, you know, prone you are, how dirty you are with any SDs. You can be a single male, female or whatever lifestyle you live. It's really on you, how much you get tested and take care of yourself and make that a priority. I know for our case, making content and whatnot and going to events, we are very adamant about being tested almost monthly. Just religiously, just give us peace of mind. And also it just as a courtesy to anybody else we play with.
But that's a misconception that we hear that it's, it's kind of a bummer, but what's, you know, on the ST, on the STD thing, I'd say, I think what people don't realize is we are all friends, right? And we do care about each other.
So that, that getting tested and taking care of your health is you nobody wants to hurt their friends or spread diseases to their friends right so so taking that extra time and getting tested and then having you know conversations about that using protection i think that's all it all goes in hand in hand with you know we are all friends we want to make sure we take care of each other that's a really good point actually if anything i'm like extra motivated because i would never want to hurt my friends in any manner um maybe more motivated than if i you know was going out and playing with random people that i might not see again so if anything i think we're a little more motivated to protect our friends and take care of them and i think vice versa them for us yeah no absolutely and then uh what was the next comment you were making of Spice?
Oh, I was saying that we get that comment a lot where, oh, you're just going to ruin your marriage. Good luck getting a divorce in a few years from now. And I'm like, dang, like we've been doing this for like almost 10 years and it's not a solution to our relationship. We just, it enhances it. It's something we like to do together. And I think that comes from a misconception, a place where people can't fathom that you can be in a relationship with somebody, but still explore your life and your sexuality.
And I do understand that because, you know, you're brought up and raised in a certain manner where, hey, when you're in a relationship, this is what you do. These are the rules. These are the boundaries. And when you see other people living outside of those, it can be confusing. And well, that must be something wrong, because I was taught that that's not what you do, or I wouldn't do that. So you shouldn't. And, you know, that that's not the case. There's all sorts of types of relationships and styles and dynamics.
And there is no one size fits all, whatever works for you, as long as everyone's consenting, everyone's brought joy and happiness. Yeah. No, I agree. I agree 100% with everything you're saying. I think it's people, like you're saying, we live in a society where we're taught that relationships look a certain way. So if your relationship looks different than that, then you draw all this judgment. Um, and I, and I will say, you know, swingers aren't immune to divorce or aren't immune to cheating. Non-monogamous people can do all those things.
And it doesn't, it does happen within our community, but no more than a monogamous community. And if I had to make an argument, I'd say it's probably less. Yeah. Yeah.
I mean, we're human like everybody else but i do see um a lot of strong couples in the lifestyle and it because it takes a it takes a strong relationship to be in the lifestyle you have to you have to be thick as the ears swinging isn't for the week for the week it's definitely we gotta have really strong bond um that confidence in each other um and be able to express all your thoughts emotions and feelings and do it efficiently so what we notice couples like you guys and a lot of our other friends we always gravitate to couples that are have a super strong bond yes they're like best friends couples that both of them want to see each other have fun pump each other up um so we that, that we kind of like tend to gravitate to couples like us with a similar dynamic.
And that's refreshing. Yeah, where there's no ego. Everyone's vulnerable. It's really refreshing to see. Yeah, we've talked about that on our Red Flag podcast. The couples that you see that barely interact or you don't see a connection between them, we tend to kind of go the opposite way. We tend to not like to play with couples like that. So I completely agree. Totally. Yeah. We see that a lot where a lot of the couples that we kind of hang out with, you could, you can feel that, uh, both the people in the couples see each other as equal and that, and that's really important for us.
Very much so. Yeah. So I got a question from Mr. Life of Spice. This is a question I've been, you know, I've been trying to get you on, on audio for a while. Oh, really? How do you, you know, how do you share your wife? Right. Why is that? Why is that? Okay. With you. Yeah. Don't you care about her? Don't you, don't you love her? How could you possibly share her with another man? This reminds me of an awesome conversation that you and I had at a hot tub in Seacrest. You remember? I do remember. Which gets me excited to go back.
So I totally understand that when someone might make a comment or have the thought of, well, how can you share your wife? You know, that she's precious to you. You got to protect her at all costs. And I could never share my wife. And I do understand that. I understand where people are coming from that. But this is how I see it. If I were to have a really nice luxury car, let's call it a Bugatti. I love that Bugatti. I worked really hard on it, you know, to keep it in good shape, take great care of it. And I love driving my Bugatti. I'll do anything for that Bugatti.
Well, I have a best friend or two that, hey, he's really interested in my Bugatti and he would like to take it out for a spin. I trust that best friend and I know that that best friend will take care of my Bugatti, not going to harm it or hurt it in any manner. He's going to enjoy driving it. My Bugatti would like to be driven by somebody else. It's a mutual agreement there. That doesn't mean that I care about my Bugatti any less. It doesn't mean I take care of it any less. It means that I trust my friend and I want to share that experience with them. But there's no wrong way.
Some people might not want to share their Bugattis and that's cool. I'm the kind of person that if I had a Bugatti, Dan, I'll let you take it out for a spin. I want you to try it out. Let me know how it feels. Yeah. No, I think it's a great way. Cause people do have a hard, a hard time, like comprehending, you know, being okay with sharing something that's so, that means so much to you.
to you right and it's I think when we think of our wife or our spouse like it's very you know for people that aren't in the lifestyle it must be very hard for them to imagine wanting to share something like that but I think most people can understand like hey if you had some food that was really really good or if you had you know like saying, a nice car, you get joy out of seeing somebody else enjoy that thing also, right? Like that, that compersion, the whole concept of compersion, right?
And, you know, I think people outside of the lifestyle, many of them, and even people inside of the lifestyle have never even heard that word. That's a, it's a foreign concept to them, right? We all know jealousy. We all know you know uh you know vulnerable and you know uh you know hate we all you know we all know those feelings right but the idea of sharing something and getting you know getting joy out of sharing that thing um you know i think it's a foreign concept to a lot of people and i think it's something that a lot of non-monogamous people absolutely understand. Yeah.
And that's how I feel with my husband. I think he's the best person I've ever met. He's hilarious. He's so cute. He's so fun in bed. I kind of feel selfish if I kept that all to myself. And that's why I love to share him with friends. And I love to see that joy that he gets when he's being flirted with or being loved on and being appreciated by whoever it is. I love seeing him happy.
And that's possible because we've, you know, it's been many years of building a foundation where we are solid in ourselves and our relationship where we both know that an interaction with somebody else isn't going to jeopardize or threaten our bond at all. It's not going to take away anything from ourselves. If anything, like we were talking about compersion, it's going to make us happy to see the other one, you know, receive joy, pleasure, happiness.
And one thing I did want to mention when we were talking about, you know, the sharing of the Bugatti era of the food, too, is I do understand that that can be a lot for somebody because sex is synonymous almost with with intimacy. And that's understandable.
But the intimate the the intimacy, like romantic intimacy and love, that's something that is just between her and I when we're dancing or when we're having playtime um when we're playing with other people um that playtime it's it's fun it is intimate but it's it's on a different level it's it's not so much the romantic love intimacy it's more like dancing with a fun partner you know we got a group going we're enjoying each other's company it's really fun but I dance differently with my wife than I would with another dance partner.
So that kind of helps differentiate when we are sharing or playing kind of how, how the boundaries are there from a mental side anyway. Yeah, no, I think that's a good, it's a good way of, of putting it. And it definitely, you know, it does get confusing, right? And we, we had a conversation with, you know, John and Jackie from Colette's about, about, you know, and I think Lacey used the term, well, I, you know, I'm, um, uh, you know, uh, monogamous with my feelings and stuff like that. And, you know, and Jackie actually, you know, questioned that a little bit.
Like, well, yeah, I understand what you're saying, but, but truthfully you, you have feelings and emotions to, to, with every person that you engage with. It's just different with your primary partner than it is with other people. And, you know, you can kind of start, I think, you know, the more you dive into this, the more it kind of opens your mind to, you know, saying like, okay, well, it's okay. I can say I love Mr. and Mrs. Life of Spice.
That doesn't necessarily mean I want to be in a polyamorous relationship with them and live in the same house with them and pay bills together and do all that stuff, right? Because I don't want that type of partnership with them, but I can care about my friends and I can have sex with my friends, but that can be separate from the relationship that I have with my wife. And I get, once you start blurring those lines, it can get confusing for some people. But for me, I think the more I've gotten into this lifestyle, the more I've been kind of okay with some of those lines getting a little blurry.
Is that similar to you? Yeah. I think it's a difference between loving and being in love. I feel like that's a huge... And there's so many varieties, so many forms of love. You can have different love between so many different people. I love so many people in my life. I love them very much. I might love each of them in a different manner, but I love them nonetheless. And I think kind of what you were going on, being in Lifestyle helps me explore that. I love all my friends and, you know, all of our people and her.
And just it's a unique type of love for every partner and every friend yeah no I agree uh so I guess you know kind of the last question I had written in my my notes here is do you think we're is there a movement are we changing things us you know all these silly tiktoks and podcasts and being out here and talking about things is that is that making a difference um what do you think i i'd hope so i i'd hope so i i would say undoubtedly so because um you know we we do receive a lot of amazing feedback and messages from from our friends online say hey you know um you guys maybe motivated us to go try to local club or we had some spicy time after watching some of your content.
It opened the conversation to this or that. And those are our favorite types of messages when a couple message you and say, hey, you inspired us to think about this or try this out. because that's that's what we're all about as cliche as it is keeping it spicy is kind of always been our thing to keep life exciting, keep your curiosity up and keep always have something to look forward to. So receiving that feedback, I hope that's indicative of that there is some sort of movement in some manner and to destigmatize the lifestyle because it's it's not as scary as people might think it is.
And it helps you discover a lot about yourself and your relationship. Um, but that's never our, our main aim. We're just, we just want to, you know, share our lives with the world. And I think by what we're all doing, all of us here, that kind of comes kind of comes naturally, honestly. Yeah.
I think us going to all these events together is fantastic because every time we go we meet a bunch of people that are like this is our first time at a club and you inspired us to be here we want to meet you guys but we also wanted to explore the lifestyle because of you we're here and we're exploring and i think that that's amazing especially like there's a difference between yeah exactly like getting those messages online are fantastic but seeing it come to fruition in person when they're like I'm here because of you this is our first time at a club ever and I'm like hell yeah like that's amazing like I think that's so cool they're actually taking the steps with their partner to be more open.
Whatever that might look like, I think it's just super cool. And I think that we should just keep going to events and doing this. Let's keep doing it. Yeah. No more separate events. No more separate events. We missed you guys so much. I think we, like, FaceTimed and went live. We even did TikToks together from two separate sides of the country. We did.
Obsessed a good obsession well you know i think it's worth noting people that haven't been following us that maybe this is the first podcast they've listened to or something like that um you know life of spice and in us and a few other creators were kind of the first not the first but we were the you know we kind of melded the word swing talk and we kind of started pushing it we kind of formed this kind of alliance yeah there was only four you know, we kind of melded the word Swing Talk and we kind of started pushing it. We kind of formed this kind of alliance. A small group of us, yeah.
You know, there was only, you know, us and you guys and for our play and a few others. You know, we're kind of the originals that kind of really started pushing this thing on social media. And it is amazing to me, you know, in the last year how much it exploded.
You know, I mean, I think there was 100,000 Swing Talk views, you know, when we we started posting with that hashtag there's almost two billion at this point in time you know i mean two billion in a year like it you know i think undoubtedly there's some type of movement right i don't want to get you know too up in arms about it but there definitely are a lot more people that are open to the idea of the lifestyle and i see new faces on tiktok you know posting non-monogamous videos every single day now it seems like where a year ago when we started I knew every one of those faces and they were probably in a group chat with us you know I mean so I definitely think things are changing I love that when we see some new faces um we'll be like yes more people to the team more people you know embracing.
That makes me happy every time I see, you know, a new couple or new count go up and they're embracing lifestyle. Um, and they're out there in the open. Cause I know it takes a lot of courage, um, to be on the open. Um, and again, you don't have, you can, you don't have to be on the open if you want to be in the lifestyle. You can be as discreet as, as you need to for your circumstance.
Um, but when we do see somebody go out there and embrace the lifestyle, it is really appreciated and it's like getting a new team member so we're happy yeah that's a great way of looking at it and you know and i think you know are we the new generation of swingers where it's finally going to be okay to say yes i'm a non-mongongous person and i'm proud of that you know i i feel like for our group you know it And I don't think, you know, I don't think there was many people that would do that.
I can think of a handful and we, we know a lot of them, but you know, that's kind of a new concept I think in the lifestyle to be able to put your face out there and say, this is, this is me. I'm part of this community, you know, and I love it. And these are my friends and it's okay that we do this.
I think we are the new generation because going back to my dad for an example oh i had to make sure i'm like dad what app are you on and he's like i'm on sdc i'm like okay cool because i'm on sls and i was like do you have you guys have your faces on there and he's like no we just have our bodies and see like and that's what i noticed a lot on profiles is just they they had their faces but like for us for example we have our faces out there so i would Thank you. There's nothing wrong with being.
We're very blessed to be in a position where we are independent, you know, financially and career wise, where we can put ourselves out there. And it's not going to jeopardize our careers, our jobs, or our relationship with our family or friends because we are open about it and everyone supports us on that. So we are very lucky to be in that position where we can be open about it. So we are happy to do that because we know there might be some people that would like to and they can't. So we do that for them too. Yeah. And I think that's the key, right?
So if, if we're the new generation and we're okay, you know, showing our faces, I, you know, I'm very vested in the fact that we need to do everything in our power to make sure that we can change things so that anybody that at least wants to be, um, can have that without fear of, you know, repercussions from, from making a decision. Um, and I'm not sure how, how we do that yet, but, uh, uh, you know, we're working on it. We're working on it. Stay tuned. Please support us. Just keep being ourselves and genuinely share a journey. Just keep doing what we're doing.
We'll show the world, you know, we are normal people. We just live a little differently, but it's not so different. We just live life a little spicier, right? Yeah. Right. That's what it's like. Keeping life spicy is what it is all about. I, there's a quote that I always remember. Most men, maybe women leave, they live lives of quiet desperation. And I don't, I'm very lucky that with my partner, I don't have to live a life of desperation. I can express my, my deep, my deepest desires and curiosities with her. Um, and we hope to inspire that in other relationships as well.
Yeah, no, you know, it's somebody that, you know, you guys have been together forever, but you know, somebody coming from a previous marriage and have gone through divorce, having a partner that you can share anything with and not, and not have, not be afraid of judgment or not be afraid that they're going to think less of you. That, that is a powerful, a powerful thing.
And I think, you know, that's, that's something pretty unique to us in the community that, you know, there's a lot of other monogamous people out there that, you know, have maybe kinky desires or spicy desires or however you want to list it, that they just, you know, they have to go hide in the bathroom and look on some of these websites to, to kind of, you know, embrace that and that they can't openly do that with their partner. So I think that is something that, you know, is great to have in a partner. Yes.
Sometimes after we'll have a fun night or something, we'll, we'll go back to the room and we call it bro now and be like dude this part was awesome that was crazy and we'll go to like we're best friends like this is so fun I love my life I like high five I'm like you're my best friend and then I get sad and be like I would I want everyone to have this like I wish everyone could could have what we have and and just have that like best friend that romance that everything in one and um i i just i wish everyone can have that that's a it's a great mission uh to be on so as we kind of wrap up here any final thoughts that you'd like to share with the the swing nation the nation of swingers uh all the people that are listening right now to life of Spice, any last words for them?
Be yourself. Life is too short to not be yourself. That's the gist of it. Well, always try to live a life of spice, no matter what that may look like for you. Love it. Just try, because life is too short. Just try to spice it up.
it spicy keep it spicy i love that um and if people are interested in you and your content and learning more about you where's the best place they can go to find this beautiful sexy couple i might add life of spice info all right so uh head over to life of spice.info check out mr and mrs spice um we love them we do you know these guys are professionals they don't they don't mess around they taught uh me and lacy a thing or two they have um both inside and outside the bedroom yeah so keeps us on schedule too yeah we're happy to have the project coordinator you are we need one in every group happy that you're there for that it's a it's always a pleasure doing business with y'all yeah we couldn't think of a better couple to be part of this team and we you know i think we've really been on this journey over the last year together with you guys and it's it's nice it's nice to be able to have that it means a lot to us so we say thanks for taking the time out to sit down with us.
I know there's lots of people that have been waiting for this podcast episode. So we're excited to get it out there. Thank you. Thank you very much for having us. And thank you, everyone, for your support. All right. And I think with that, folks, remember, in a world full of apples, be the pineapple, be the pineapple guys. Bye. Bye. If you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us, leave a five-star review wherever you're listening. If you want to see more of our content, you can find links to Snapchat, Twitter, Instagram, OnlyFans, and more in the show notes.
Come join the conversation with us and other Swinger content creators on our Swinger Society Discord server. If you have questions or feedback, email them to us at theswingnation at gmail.com. Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up to date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.
